>>705703
>Why does our finance belenos take steroids?

Maybe he just works out and has a natural tendency towards being a big dude, Kappi. Aren't belenos who do take steroids usually even bigger? Like Jells?

Anyway, tell him you want to talk to him about something that shouldn't be talked about out in the hall, and ask if you can come in. You may need to offer the drink as a bribe.

... Have you guys not interacted before? I'd have assumed you would have, at least professionally.

Also sheesh Kappi we never said go talk to Itcher now. You probably just woke him up! Or woke him up when Rokoa called Jess over, since they sleep together. Actually Jessica's probably still in there behind him.

... This might not be the best time actually.

Ok uh just ask him if there'll be some time later when he'll be free to talk during the day!

>>705701
Hahaha, poor Jess. So many mixed signals and mood whiplash. She had to worried about what Rokoa might be calling her over for after last night, and then she gives her chocolate. Only chocolate means something completely different coming from Rokoa.

You're gonna leave her so traumatized she'll need Kappi just to recover!

>Why does our finance belenos take steroids?
He's not that big. And if he does, the answer is probably because he was a mobster.

>>705703
Uh, look, I don't know if it's really my place to say this, but you don't have the benefit of empathy on your side. You know she's interested in you, right?

I don't think Jess would be there, she's already stopped round for the chocolate, and since Kappi mentioned her covering for him work-wise, I'd assume she's doing that.

Gonna agree with the >>705706 here, since well this is kinda awkward, and this approach gets it the point across quickly.

Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)15:19 No. 705719 ID: dd338c
File 145652879580.png - (17.09KB , 800x800 , 181.png )

>Also sheesh Kappi we never said go talk to Itcher now
Rokoa and I already exercised! Jess is at work. It's like 8 AM now since breakfast took awhile. It shouldn't be that early for him!

>Maybe he just works out and has a natural tendency towards being a big dude, Kappi. Aren't belenos who do take steroids usually even bigger? Like Jells?
Well, yes, but... this guy is really big to be a natural belenos. Like, it's possible I guess, but the chances are really tiny - he's not really tall for a belenos, but he is beefy. I guess it's not too much steroids though, cause then he would end up like Jells or other meatwall belenos, it's just that most belenos don't have much for side effects, so if they use it, they use a lot. Then again, I hear it's kinda expensive to keep it up.

"Can I come in to talk?"
>"Yeah, it's not like I was busy or anything."
"Sorry, it's just - "
>"No, give me a damn break from the numbers. I'm in a real curious mood why you're up here." he says, guiding me in.
"So, uh... okay, neumono aren't good at tact or sublety to aliens or anything without empathy or overcommunication or whatever. So, um.... are you aware that Jessica is romantically interested in you?"
>"What. Seriously?"
"Yeah, she really doesn't know if you're aware of it or not."
>"Gee, I really wasn't, here I thought that she just liked squishing her tits on things while I was looking. And that all those nights where she hugs me tight and starts grinding the back of my tail with her crotch, I was just thinkin' that she had a real itchy groin and figured that I should live up to my namesake more often. It all makes sense now. Ya really opened my eyes, blue guy. Any other mind blowers you wanna spill?"

I guess the alcohol could be a mind blower?

>Any other mind blowers you wanna spill?
Well, I've learned aliens are apparently terrible at communication too, if you picked up on that but couldn't manage a simple "yes" or "no" in return, and left her wondering if she was just that bad at leaving a hint.

>I guess the alcohol could be a mind blower?
He'd probably be upset if you spilled it, though.

But booze might make the bro-talk more amenable, sure.

>>705719

"Ok, sure, it's obvious what Jess' feelings are, but it's your feelings I'm thinking about! I'm just gonna be blunt, like probably rude blunt but you seem like you appreciate straight-talk, despite the sarcasm. You know I'm with Rokoa, right? Well, Jess met us yesterday and we got to talking about her romantic life, and long story short Jess is pretty pent-up and wanted someone to blow off steam with, someone who she could like and be friends with but who wouldn't get attached to her, and since I was focused on Rokoa and Rokoa didn't mind and I definitely didn't mind, she asked if I would help her out. But I was wondering whether or not you had any feelings for Jess and Jess said she couldn't tell, and so I want to to know how you feel about the whole thing because I don't want any bad feelings to be going on, in anyone's corner. So what's the deal, Itcher?"

Ah, sarcasm, I think.

If he knew, why didn't he let her know whether or not he was interested in return?

So he's not an idiot. Which is weird, because then he should realize Jess not having a straight answer is messing with her real hard.

>>705719
Jeez, tell him to lessen up with the sarcasm already. Ask what he's gonna do about it. So far you've heard he's doing nothing about it, which is really not fair to her.

Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)15:44 No. 705734 ID: dd338c
File 145653028233.png - (12.97KB , 800x800 , 182.png )

"If you know, then why don't you give her a yes or no in return? She's been having trouble lately, not knowing for sure how you feel, and if it's obvious to you that she's into you, then you should know that not giving her a straight answer is messing with her hard!"
>"Yeah, so now I guess I'll tell a random neumono on my doorstep all about what I haven't told Jess."
"... will alcohol keep you from being so sarcastic?"
>"That how it is, huh? Well, yeah, it will. My tongue doesn't get slippery with booze, but let's have it." he says, taking it from me and drinking straight from the bottle.
"Do you know I'm with Rokoa? Apparently Jess needs attention enough to practically ask me for help, even knowing that! I mean neither Rokoa or I mind so I would help, but I want to know where you and Jess stand before I get into that."
>"Oh, that it? Sheesh, I don't mind, fuck her brains out if you want."
"No, that's not it! I want to know what you think about Jessica."
>"If I was gonna go talkin' about my feelings like that, it'd make more sense for me to just talk to Jess about it, yeah?"

Yeah, it would, so why aren't you? You know if you just shut her down, she'll be ok, we're all adults and she'll still be your friend and all. Or is it just that you don't know your feelings?

Wait. Hold, on maybe I've figured it out. I heard you had a thing with some other belenos. You're hoping to get with her, right? But you don't know if it's going to work out. So... dude, are you hedging your bets? Like if you do get the girl you're after now, then you'll drop Jess, but until you do then maybe you won't and if you don't then you'll feel ok to get with Jessica?

Because if so, man I guess I understand but if Jess is hanging as your backup you should at least let her know that's how it stands.

Heck do you even know if this other girl your after would mind you being with Jess too?

Well if you were willing to talk to Jess about your feelings I would not be here.

If you want to be just friends with Jess that is fine. If you want to be lovers that is also fine. But don't keep her in the dark like this.

Neumono can usually tell instantly what someone is feeling. But with aliens we have no idea what might be going on upstairs. So Jess is just going to get more and more nervous and desperate and scared.

All the while hoping that you might like her as more than just a friend but being scared that she might push to hard and ruin your friendship. Which might happen if you let this go on much longer.

Please don't be that creepy guy who just leads women along and never commits to anything. Even that's not your intention that is what is happening.

Figure out your own feelings and let her know one way or another. And if you need someone to talk to you can always look me up.

>>705734
then why haven't you?

Well this got weird, fast.

>>"If I was gonna go talkin' about my feelings like that, it'd make more sense for me to just talk to Jess about it, yeah?"
Sure, it would. Were you planning on doing that at any point?

>>705734
Yeah, except you haven't, because you're worried about screwing it up, right? Well you can't screw up talking to me about it.

Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)16:23 No. 705748 ID: dd338c
File 145653258047.png - (17.57KB , 800x800 , 183.png )

"If you were willing to do that, I wouldn't be here! Okay, hold on, I heard you have another belenos girl you might be into. But that's kind of really iffy. Are you stringing along Jess just in case it doesn't - "
>"Gonna stop you right there, asshole. I'm not keeping her around for the rebound potential."
"I'd hope that's not what you're trying to do, but it's what's happening because of whatever it is you are doing!"
>"Eh, she should've said that. She knows full well I was playing dense, but I figured she was fucking guys as needed. I didn't ask, you know."
"I don't think she knows whether or not you'd be okay with that."
>"What, for my sake? That girl can be dumb as a brick, I got no place as her not-boyfriend to tell her she can't do that."
"She doesn't know what topics she can push without messing up the friendship."
>"Well it ain't that one! Fuckin' hell, I didn't think she was one of those 'afraid to ruin the friendship' types and just go for it. Always gotta be so complicated."

He dials his phone.

>"Hey, Jess..... yeah whatever. Blue guy's here. Had a chat. Real bro-talk. You seriously into me?.... no, you idiot, I know about the damn tail humps, I was there! I meant into me as a serious thing. Yeah, hey, would you be happy if I gave up Alia and settled for you? Cause we both know that's what it is. Settling cause I didn't have the balls or ability to go for Alia. You honestly telling me you'd be okay with that?... yeah, you bitch, we both know it's the 'reasonable' thing to do, but we also both know that the courting game is anything but that. You wanna know where we stand? On weird shifting ground. You know what, though, I just told blue guy that I got no place to tell you who you can and can't sleep with - that's right, I don't have a problem if you fool around with other 'mono, cause that's how you guys work - but that also means Alia's got no place telling me who I can and can't sleep with. If we - Alia and I - get together, then maybe we won't fool around anymore, but till then, if Alia's got a problem with it, maybe it wasn't gonna work out for more down to earth reasons. And don't give me that 'not attractive' shit about yourself. You guys are weird and stocky, but if I just wanted the humps to stop, I would've told you to stop. But I kicked you out of bed cause you really wittle down my self control, and - fuckin' hell, the blue guy is still here. How many damn words did I just say? That's why I didn't want to explain all this shit, this isn't some easy standing on clear ground, we've got a lot of bullshit to go over and I swore to myself like a year ago I'd never get into that. Well that and I didn't know you were goin' fuckin' chastity cause you seriously thought I'd hate that. So yeah, let's get smashed tonight and talk the shit out of each other. I'm hanging up."

He flips the phone off and faces me.

>"There. Done. Simple. Now get the hell outta my house."

>>705748
Bye, Itcher. Thanks.

Mission Accomplished. He seems alright. Maybe bro it up for real in, like... months. For now, skedaddle.

Wish that had gone a little more smoothly, probably best to do as he asks. Hopefully he won't hold a grudge or something about us being blunt.

>"There. Done. Simple. Now get the hell outta my house."
Sure, no problem. Enjoy the consolation booze.

...does resolving stupid domestic problems like this actually count as doing your job as quartermaster?

Sorry our first real meeting was like this. Let's just chock this up to culture-psychic social shock and maybe make a better first impression later when this meeting is the furthest from our minds.

>"Well it ain't that one! Fuckin' hell, I didn't think she was one of those 'afraid to ruin the friendship' types and just go for it. Always gotta be so complicated."

To be fair, she was going to go for it. Kappi pushed to talk about it because he wanted to help sort things out more clean and and honest-like.

Well, Kappi, assuming he didn't just bullshit you by speaking into a phone that didn't connect - which he probably didn't, since Itcher's a smart guy and would know how easy it would be to figure that out - then you're free to go. Just say "No problem, Itcher. And since you can't read my empathy, let me tell you I'm not being sarcastic when I say I'm happy to help! Call me up if there's anything you need. Bye!"

Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)16:42 No. 705761 ID: dd338c
File 145653377271.png - (14.87KB , 800x800 , 184.png )

"Uh, yeah, thanks. Sorry for butting in, we'll probably talk later on work terms later which will be better."
>"Work, better? That's real optimistic."
"Still, uh, happy to help. Goodbye, enjoy the booze."

>Well, Kappi, assuming he didn't just bullshit you by speaking into a phone that didn't connect
It would've been impressive, because I did hear Jess on the other side. I mean, I couldn't make out what she was saying at all, but it did sound like her chatting at him.

>Does resolving stupid domestic problems like this actually count as doing your job as quartermaster?
No, but I am friends with Jess, so, this kind of counts as my job as friend I guess.

Well, I guess that's it. I mean, the rest of the day is pretty much planned out for me for when Rokoa is around, the only other thing I think I might do is talk to Pilon about Rokoa's wants. I don't know if I should, though.

>he only other thing I think I might do is talk to Pilon about Rokoa's wants. I don't know if I should, though
That feels like a subject for when Rokoa isn't around. When she's gone, you can bother other people for insight you might be missing. When she's here, make the most of it. Learn what you can about her by being with her.

Well, ask the CAI where Rokoa is, where Pilon is, and if Karri's anywhere near him. If Rokoa's not come back out to play yet, Pilon is somewhere convenient, and Karri isn't anywhere that she'd hear you talking about Rokoa, you could try have a word with him. It wouldn't take long to just to shoot a few suggestions of what it could be, for him to shoot down if he can.

Otherwise, go meet up with Rokoa.

You do have to start thinking about finding things to help you figuring out what Rokoa wants, though. It's going to be really hard to find out from just watching her, and the quicker you can pull it off the more impressed she'll be.

Hmm... I wonder who the most recent rogue from her hive is. I know you don't get friendly with each other just from coming from the same hive you're not part of any more, but you'd be willing to talk to each other, right? With enough of a bribe you could maybe get them to offer insight from what they could remember, if they'd interacted much with her. It's a slim chance, though.

Charming Itcher as always, well it's sorted now.

Talking with Pilon would probably help, but I agree with >>705762 in that it's better to ask when Rokoa's not here.

If we do ask though, I'd advocate not being direct, she said it wouldn't be impressive if she just told you, so I'm guessing she wants you to work it out on your own. That isn't to say you can't ask Pilon for some stories so you have more information to think on though.

Ask the CAI for a helmet. Cause Rokoa's gonna take your other ear.

If she wont tell you directly you have to find out somehow.

A quick trip to Pilons should not hurt. He might give you some insights at least.

Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)17:02 No. 705769 ID: dd338c
File 145653493685.png - (22.06KB , 800x800 , 185.png )

No, I'll wait for a better opportunity for when Rokoa isn't around, if I can't get the information from Rokoa directly. And when Karri isn't around Pilon, which is probably trickier.

I show Jess around the programs that she still needs help on, before I return to Rokoa, who just arrived in my room.

>Ask the CAI for a helmet. Cause Rokoa's gonna take your other ear.
Well, a helmet would be cheating! That might just get her to be rougher with me to make it fair.

She's in her - oh damnit I forgot to put on my huge nerd shirt. She's definitely feeling intense, and there are no other neumono in empathy range at the moment. I think the CAI is going to give me a room even further away from normal residences.

"Hi Kappi. I'm going to take your ear now."

RUN, FORREST! RUN!

>>705769
Oh no.

Remember, you have the advantage of agility and probably speed from being so much smaller than her. Make it hard for her to get a grip on you by using her size against her, and never let the situation become a battle of strength.

Yell oh my god is that Polo? Then point over her shoulder and then run for it.

Or put your fists up and defend yourself.

I warned you bro, warned you about helmets.

I think you're going to have to DODGE!

Well, at least she's getting this out the way so you don't have to be paranoid all day.

You probably don't want to turn this into a contest of stamina or strength. I'd suggest to try turn your knowledge of the area to evade her. You can't hide because of empathy, but you might wear her down by forcing her to spend more effort than necessary to locate you.

Look for rope or something to tie her up with. Unless you can manage to subdue her she wont stop fighting.

Also you need to watch her hands and mouth, as those are the easiest ways she'll get you.

The important thing is to make sute she doesnt grab you in a good hold.

>Hi Kappi. I'm going to take your ear now.
Uh. I want to suggest resistance or running but Kappi's almost right in front of Rokoa and she's fast. He's not getting far.

Might be able to use your smaller size to get to spaces she can't follow easily, but you don't have enough of a lead.

...do I get a head start?

https://youtu.be/fjHGTeTtaac?t=22s

Well, time for the same advice Polo got. She's bigger than you, so she takes longer to speed up and slow down. Get sprinting, take lots of corners, and in your case Kappi, take advantage of your knowledge of the terrain!

1/2 Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)17:42 No. 705790 ID: dd338c
File 145653736236.png - (25.17KB , 800x800 , 186.png )

I almost ask if I get a head start, but I know the answer. It is no.

I leap for my bedroom, because I've already shut the door, and I might have some bedsheets or maybe even rope or something to subdue her with.

She runs at me and is way faster, and throws her hand out to either block me or catch me. I manage to keep from getting grabbed like that, but she puts her arm in front of her, slamming it into the wall. It makes such a loud thud that I swear she nearly punched a hole through the wall! I still manage to duck underneath, and start running for the bedroom.

She leaps after me, and I don't have any room to evade while she's taking up the whole hallway!

Dating A Murder Neumono END Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)17:43 No. 705791 ID: dd338c
File 145653739466.png - (14.68KB , 800x800 , 187.png )

Daaaaamnit that did not go well at all! She yanks my ear off with way too much ease.

"Good. Now roll over. You are going to be on your back, and I am going to get even for what you did to me yesterday. And then I will keep going, so that you have something to revenge back on when you aren't such a wuss."

Well. This is my life now. It probably looks bad from the outside, but.... I feel good.

Well Kappi, you did better than expected. In some ways, a lot better.

... Which means the bar's that much higher again.

Good luck!

Good job buddy. You got the girl and life is sweet.

Keep on improving cause we expect big things out of you next time we see you.

Epilogue 1/2 Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)18:13 No. 705797 ID: dd338c
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Later on... we go back to the dance machine. It takes a lot of tries, and Rokoa seems like she might overdo it again. However, she's also feeling like she has more energy this time around to spare on it.

I hold her hands again while she plays it, and eventually, we get it. A perfect score, twice in a row, to beat Hok.

Epilogue 2/2 Kappi 2016/02/26(Fri)18:13 No. 705798 ID: dd338c
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>"Hey Kappi and hey Rokoa, nice ears. I'm back from adventures. You two lovers up to any - oh hey it's this game, and oh hey Rokoa you beat my record. I knew it was easy! I kept telling people this game wasn't hard at all but if you can get perfects on a silly video game then it must be."
"Errrr hey Hok do you know of any cheap ammo? I want to be able to practice firing guns."
>"Well I mean you're in an arcade and there's basically a realistic gun simulator. It's got a VR helmet to give you accurate vision and the gun has artificial recoil and everything. That should actually be about on par with a firing range for just shooting the things."
"Have you played it?"
>"Oh yeah that games easy too, I have the high score on that one."
"CAI. Modify that game so that the moving targets are Hok running. I am going to get the high score."

>I swear she nearly punched a whole through the wall!
Aren't the walls made of metal? Damn.

>Well. This is my life now. It probably looks bad from the outside, but.... I feel good.
That's the spirit Kappi! You can do it! Look how far you've come already! You'll be someone Rokoa can rely on in no time.

I wonder what kind of lewd thoughts the CAI is thinking right about now.

>>705799
...
It happened again.

Mr. C!!Z5AwqwMwxj 2016/02/26(Fri)19:53 No. 705818 ID: 8013df
File 145654521223.jpg - (58.56KB , 296x195 , 145653919682.jpg )

Am I the only one who thinks Hok is stoned. Look at his eyes.

>>705818
I think Mikliks just look like that, Pomi too sometimes.