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File 140969062371.png - (135.71KB , 800x800 , 304.png )
592224 No. 592224 ID: d470e9

CHOP'S DREAMS roll throughout his mind like LAVA down a CRAGGED SLOPE. That is, UNTIL IMAGES of ARMS WOVEN AROUND SLEEPING SURFACES and PUNY PRINCESS PUFF PUPPETS pop the STEEL COATED BUBBLE OF FORMER IMAGES that are now FOREVER LOST like CHOP'S MERCY TOWARDS THOSE WHO AWAKEN HIM.

>"Do you think he's asleep?"
>"....Is that rhetorical, Princess? I don't think he's asleep. I don't think he sleeps, ever."
>"Oh come on! We're here so early, though! The moon has a ways to go before getting to the horizon, and the candles here aren't even lit. And... d... do you wanna draw on his face? Oo, or check out his bedroom?"

....

>"... okay, maybe he's asleep. And yes. Yes, I would like to doom us to some kind of painful, probably coal-related fate. Still, there's gotta be other people here. This place is always trashed at the end of the day, and everyone leaves, but when we come back? Spotless."
>"Oh my god I thought I was the only one who noticed that."
>"And breakfast? Can you imagine Chop with an apron, toiling over the stoves here?"
367 posts omitted. Last 100 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 662083 ID: ab7529

>>662082
Carefully remove the "do not disturb sign", flip it over so it reads "please enter" and then do so. With gusto.
>>
No. 662084 ID: d90668

Listen at the door for party sounds.

Then quietly open it to sneak in or loudly knock it down depending on what you hear.
>>
No. 662088 ID: e114bc

>>662082
Enter.
>>
No. 664215 ID: 2f5cb5

it Says "do not disturb", Not "do not enter"
>>
No. 664239 ID: 1a0c40

Also, it says 'please' and you clearly aren't here to please anyone.
>>
No. 664455 ID: dd338c
File 144026576156.png - (150.84KB , 800x800 , 402.png )
664455

Chop finds that the NOTE REQUESTING NO DISTURBANCE is VASTLY UNDERMINED by the UNLOCKED DOOR.

CHOPLUMEI'S VISION beholds the SLEEPING SWAP MAGE and a MAGE OF HEALING.

"Oh um excuse me but this one is really sick right now!"
>>
No. 664456 ID: bac0ea

Inform them that you are here to aid in not only the healings, but continued health of tiny mages
>>
No. 664459 ID: dd338c
File 144026657579.png - (76.53KB , 800x800 , 403.png )
664459

"CHOPLUMEI is here to ASSIST IN HEALINGS and the CONTINUED HEALTH of ALL MAGES."
>"O-oh! Okay, um, first please uh lower your volume. Secondly, how are you going to help? I really think he'll be fine just with some rest!"
>>
No. 664461 ID: bb78f2

>>664459
You will PUNYFY US and we will go into his BODY and PUNCH ALL THE GERMS.
It is the ONLY WAY.
We need him well NOW!
>>
No. 664462 ID: e114bc

>>664459
Are you saying he has the COMMON COLD? ...he caught it from Lumei didn't he.

Ask the swap mage when he will be able to swap you back. Is it true it'll be permanent in a few days?
>>
No. 664475 ID: ab7529

>I really think he'll be fine just with some rest!
Give healing mage a strong stare to determine truthfulness. Give the swap mage another stare to determine state of physical health.

Also assess the cleanliness / filthiness of both.
>>
No. 664481 ID: dd338c
File 144027353402.png - (139.20KB , 800x800 , 404.png )
664481

"CHOPLUMEI shall be PUNIFIED to enter the BODY OF SWAPMAGE to PUNCH ALL BODY-AILMENTS."
>"Um... we don't have anyone that can punify that much. Alsooo we're pretty sure that's just a bad idea maybe?"
"This that AILS THE SWAPMAGE. Is it called the COMMON COLD?"
>"Ah, yeah! Seems like it. It's been going around a lot, but it's harmless as long as they don't get overworked."
"And the PUNY MAGE BEFORE ME says it shall be DEFEATED in a FEW DAYS TIME?"
>"Usually, yes, as long as he gets rest!"

>Assess CLEANLINESS
LUMEI'S EYES report to CHOP'S MIND that the SWAPMAGE has recently been MARGINALLY WASHED, and the MAGE OF HEALING has WASHED HERSELF to EXISTANT YET SUB-ADEQUATE LEVELS.
>>
No. 664482 ID: e114bc

>>664481
Ask about the two days time limit. Maybe THAT is the lie the doorman told us, not about the swap mage being sick.
>>
No. 664484 ID: ab7529

>>664481
Cleaning time, then!
>>
No. 664493 ID: 3663d3

bring in the portable baths
>>
No. 664530 ID: ad936f

The CRUSADE OF CLEANLINESS shall not be dissuaded so easily!
>>
No. 664546 ID: 91ee5f

>>664481
Lumei's body's ears are missing! Chop, did you rip her ears off or something?!?! DX
>>
No. 664547 ID: bb78f2

Intimidate the cold right out of the swap mage. Let the germs know your intent. PUNCH THEM WITH YOUR EYEBALLS, YOUR SOUL!
>>
No. 664579 ID: dd338c
File 144030773689.png - (176.52KB , 800x800 , 405.png )
664579

>Intimidate the cold right out of the swap mage. Let the germs know your intent. PUNCH THEM WITH YOUR EYEBALLS, YOUR SOUL!
The BODY AILMENTS are COLD, UNFEELING, and CANNOT UNDERSTAND the PERIL THAT IT LIES IN. It shall NOT BE GRACED WITH EYE CONTACT.

CHOPLUMEI does not CARE for WHERE THE LIES CAME FROM.

There is only CLEANLINESS, NOW.

"BEHOLD THE CAULDRON OF ANTI-SICK MAGIC."
"Oh my gosh is that boiling water?!"
CHOPBODY shall now PLUCK THE SWAPMAGE from its FOUL RESTING PLACE and place it UPON ITS FINAL RESTING PLACE. OF SICKNESS.
>>
No. 664580 ID: dd338c
File 144030774917.png - (179.78KB , 800x800 , 406.png )
664580

The SWAPMAGE is INEXPLICABLY FILLED WITH VIGOUR as it makes a VALIANT ATTEMPT at FLEEING WITH HIS SICKNESS.
>>
No. 664581 ID: e114bc

>>664580
See? He's CURED! The ANTI-SICK MAGIC worked!
>>
No. 664582 ID: ab7529

>>664580
Glare. That'll get the germs out faster!
>>
No. 664587 ID: 7aa334

Give him THE SOUP.
>>
No. 664603 ID: ad936f

>>664587
yes, fill him with valuable germ fighting sustenance.
>>
No. 664612 ID: d90668

Wait do they assume that any water heated to over river temperature is boiling? No wonder everyone around here is filthy and sick.

Get him all soaped up and scrub the filth off.
>>
No. 664618 ID: 7aa334

Perhaps these sicklings could benefit from some ACUPUNCHTURE. You simple do the same thing as you do when punching people in their vital pressure points, only in reverse, so it causes HEALTH instead of HURTYTIMES.
>>
No. 664651 ID: ea0ad9

>VALIANT ATTEMPT at FLEEING WITH HIS SICKNESS.
Are you sure he isn't trying to climb out while the sickness is trapped in the cauldron?
>>
No. 664944 ID: dd338c
File 144047912851.png - (119.08KB , 800x800 , 407.png )
664944

"The SOUP CAULDRONS shall now FEED ALL WHO ARE SICK. The SOAP CAULDRONS shall now BATHE ALL WHO ARE SICK. DO NOT CONFUSE THESE TWO CAULDRONS."

Despite that, the SWAPMAGE'S BODY STILL FIGHTS with as much CALMNESS as a KICKED WASPHIVE DURING AN EARTHQUAKE THUNDERSTORM.
>>
No. 664945 ID: dd338c
File 144047914343.png - (148.06KB , 800x800 , 408.png )
664945

CHOP performs SECRET TECHNIQUE: ACUPUNCHTURE TO CALM THE SWAPMAGE.

>"Uh, how long does a bath take?" CHOP'S BODY ASKS.
>>
No. 664946 ID: e114bc

>>664945
Like 15 minutes. Scrubbing should be involved.
>>
No. 664947 ID: 57dfcc

>>664945
It takes the time it takes to sing "happy birthday" to wash just your hands. So the swap mage obvious needs to sing happy birthday as many times as he is pairs of hands big to be clean.
>>
No. 664976 ID: 3663d3

scruba dub dub.
>>
No. 664977 ID: ea0ad9

>>664946
For somebody who hasn't been keeping clean, probably more like 45 minutes.
>>
No. 664979 ID: 974a6c

Are we literally curing him with our fist magic?
Chop is best muscle wizard!
What we need now is herbs and medicines.
>>
No. 665609 ID: dd338c
File 144089190858.png - (112.77KB , 800x800 , 409.png )
665609

"The KOBOLD STANDARD for LENGTH OF WASHING HANDS is the time it takes to SING THE SONG OF BIRTH. LUMEI'S MIND. How LARGE is this KOBOLD in PAIRS OF HANDS?"
>"... like, these hands? Of yours?"
"NO, as CHOP'S BODY shall not be the one SINGING THE SONG. It must be HIS HANDS."
>"...Twwweeeenntyyy?"
"SO IT SHALL BE. The SWAPMAGE shall SING 20 ITERATIONS OF BIRTHSONG while SCRUBBING."
>>
No. 665610 ID: dd338c
File 144089191963.png - (93.81KB , 800x800 , 410.png )
665610

>H... happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to... uh..."
"ME."
>"Chooop, happy birthday to youuu."
"19 TIMES TO GO before he has SUNG THE SICKNESS AWAY. ADD THE HERBS AND MEDICINE TO THE CAULDRON."

>"Chop, Chop!" I hear a SOLDIER OF CHOP'S say.
>>
No. 665611 ID: dd338c
File 144089192774.png - (107.32KB , 800x800 , 411.png )
665611

"What does SOLDIER have to report?"
>"We have a situation, one of the mages got more sick after the treatment."
"What? EXPLAIN to CHOP the ERROR OF CHOP'S CLEANING WAYS."
>"Well, it wasn't yours, but we weren't quite keeping an eye on one, and he, uh.... confused the two cauldrons."
"You say he BATHED IN THE SOUP and DRANK THE SOAP?"
>"Yes."
>>
No. 665613 ID: 57dfcc

>>665611
Then perhaps he has learned a lesson in FOLLOWING DIRECTIONS CORRECTLY and in the POWER OF OBSERVATION.

Really, though, just send the healing mage to him after he throws up the soap, wash the soup off of him, and then see about getting some soup in him where it will do actual good this time.
>>
No. 665614 ID: 3663d3

dang it, you are the strongest but are you also the smartest somehow? you thought mages were all about being brainy.
>>
No. 665616 ID: bb78f2

LABEL all the CAULDRON's STAT.

If WEAK-MINDED MAGE'S have POOR READING EYES, then I MUST take on the task of LITERACY TRAINING. What does it say when OUR MAGE'S CANNOT READ?
>>
No. 665620 ID: d90668

Well how clean was the soup and how nourishing was the soap?
>>
No. 665621 ID: e114bc

Rinse the soupy mage off and see if you can get the soap out of him.
>>
No. 665622 ID: 46df9e

Why was one of the sick left unobserved if he were in a state to make such a mistake?

As for a solution we must simply punch all the soap out of his gut to make room for the soup; then bath him for twice the length of a regular bath to clean off the soup in addition to the regular dirt and germs.
>>
No. 666086 ID: dd338c
File 144106948168.png - (99.65KB , 800x800 , 412.png )
666086

"The CAULDRONS shall be TRANSFORMED to be CAULDRONS WITH LABELS, starting IMMEDIATELY. WHY has the SICKMAGE been left UNATTENDED, as CHOP MUST ASSUME IS THE CAUSE OF THIS MISTAKE."
>"Correct. We take full responsibility and I offer no excuse. I will correct this mistake immediately."
"GOOD. No other MAGES shall CAST SELF-DISASTER. CHOP and LUMEI shall SOLVE SICKMAGE'S SICK, while YOU SHALL REMAIN AND GUARD SWAPMAGE."
>>
No. 666087 ID: dd338c
File 144106948807.png - (125.00KB , 800x800 , 413.png )
666087

SOON after CHOP-LUMEI'S DEPARTURE, SICKMAGE IS SPOTTED.
>>
No. 666088 ID: dd338c
File 144106949776.png - (185.81KB , 800x800 , 414.png )
666088

>Rinse the soup off of him
>>
No. 666089 ID: dd338c
File 144106950539.png - (178.60KB , 800x800 , 415.png )
666089

"THE SOUP IS EASILY RINSED, BUT THE SOAP HAS TRANSFORMED INTO SICKESS WITHIN THE SICKMAGE."
>>
No. 666090 ID: dd338c
File 144106952186.png - (204.88KB , 800x800 , 416.png )
666090

>Punch the soap out of his gut
"CHOP'S MIND CASTS: PURGE ILLNESS."
>>
No. 666091 ID: dd338c
File 144106953054.png - (190.70KB , 800x800 , 417.png )
666091

>"hurk"
>>
No. 666093 ID: dd338c
File 144106963655.png - (212.15KB , 800x800 , 418.png )
666093

>Apply healing mage

"MAGE STATUS: CURED."
>>
No. 666094 ID: e114bc

>>666093
I think mage-abuse time might be over. Lumei is getting upset.

Oh well the cleaning and feeding is probably done by now anyway. See if the swapmage is feeling healthy enough to fix things.
>>
No. 666170 ID: 57dfcc

Right. Let's see if the swap mage is fixed yet.
>>
No. 666173 ID: dd338c
File 144108262769.png - (131.32KB , 800x800 , 419.png )
666173

Upon CHOP'S RETURN to the SWAPMAGE, word comes in that THE MAGE CAVERNS have been SUCCESSFULLY SUBDUED, and shall shortly be THE CLEAN CAVERNS.

"SWAPMAGE. Are you ABLE TO SWAP?"
>"If.... if I do, will you guys go away?"
"SO LONG as the MAGES REMAIN CLEANSED, YES."
>"Then... yeah. Yeah let's do this."
>>
No. 666174 ID: dd338c
File 144108264060.png - (118.02KB , 800x800 , 420.png )
666174

CHOP'S MIND AND BODY ARE ONE AGAIN.

"LUMEI. CONFIRM THAT THIS MAGE DID NOT ACCIDENTALLY SWAP YOU WITH AN INNOCENT BYSTANDER to lead to FUTURE MISADVENTURES."
>"Nope, nope, I'm okay! I mean, weak, but..."
"INCORRECT. IS CHOPBODY'S VISION INFERIOR? NO. You have SEEN THE STRENGTH THAT LIES WITHIN, it is your AILING BELIEFS THAT BRING YOUR WEAKNESS."
>"Y.... yeah, I guess so. I-I mean, yeah, you're right!"

It is time to either CONTINUE CHOP'S ARMY VERSUS REMNANTS OF MAGICAL RESISTANCE, or begin SHEEMUS VERSUS INSTRUCTOR OF THE WEAK.
>>
No. 666176 ID: e114bc

>>666174
Witness the HUMBLING of your RIVAL.
>>
No. 666177 ID: 57dfcc

Lumei: hug self like a silly person, because you're happy to be you again.

>It is time to either CONTINUE CHOP'S ARMY VERSUS REMNANTS OF MAGICAL RESISTANCE, or begin SHEEMUS VERSUS INSTRUCTOR OF THE WEAK.
Choparmy v mages is a forgone conclusion. We know they're getting cleaned no matter what.

On to Sheemus and suspense.
>>
No. 666252 ID: bb3898

Just remember that the INSTRUCTOR OF THE WEAK is not really our rival he's just another trainer in the caverns, just like how there are more then one mage there can be more then one trainer. This is about getting our students back not getting rid of the instructor.
Who knows, maybe his style if instructing will encourage others to start training and some of them might wont a tougher challenge and come to our dojo.
>>
No. 666254 ID: d90668

The mages have been cleansed nicely and while you might have to stop by occasionally it should be good for now.

So off to deal with the other instructor.
>>
No. 666353 ID: dd338c
File 144115080888.png - (83.47KB , 800x800 , 421.png )
666353

"CHOP and LUMEI shall leave the MAGE SCRUBBING DUTIES to CHOP'S ARMY." CHOP states, DOING EXACTLY THAT as he ENTERS THE DOJO.

"SHEEMUS."
>"Ah?! Oh gosh I didn't lose my name already! Yes?!"
"You shall be my RECRUIT OF CHOICE to MEET THE INSTRUCTOR that has PULLED THE FELLOW RECRUITS IN as BABY BEARS TO BABY BEE HONEY."
>"Oh, what am I gonna do with the instructor?"
"BATTLE."
>"OH. Oh... okay! I guess!"
>>
No. 666354 ID: dd338c
File 144115081750.png - (167.80KB , 800x800 , 422.png )
666354

CHOP, LUMEI and SHEEMUS have ENTERED THE LAIR OF FEEBLENESS.

"Where have the RECRUITS GONE TO?"
>"Ah! Chop! Chop! It's you! Hello! I mean, - okay, yeah, some of your recruits came by, sorry about that, I didn't actually mean for them to come but the chieftain was talking about how before I can teach any villagers I should see if I can get the recommendation of some of Chop's pupils and - er, sorry, let me slow down. You're an idol of mine! Your recruits were let off for the day, actually, so I don't know where they are. What can I do for you? Have you come to beat me up maybe?"
>>
No. 666355 ID: e114bc

>>666354
Why, would you enjoy that? I am here to test your strength against SHEEMUS!
>>
No. 666357 ID: 57dfcc

>Have you come to beat me up maybe?
Chop does not BEAT PEOPLE UP. He BATTLES ENEMIES and TRAINS STUDENTS. You are currently NEITHER.

>recruits gone
Hmm. Loses some impact without an audience. Maybe we should arrange for them to be here.
>>
No. 666361 ID: d90668

We need to make this guy one of your students so you can teach him the ways of strength personally.
>>
No. 666390 ID: ea0ad9

>Chop does not BEAT PEOPLE UP. He BATTLES ENEMIES and TRAINS STUDENTS. You are currently NEITHER.
However, Chop has decided to GAUGE THE TINY TRAINER'S STRENGTH in the art of TEACHING STUDENTS by having one of his students DUEL THE THIN TEACHER. Chop's expectations are NOT HIGH for the TRAINER OF FLAPPY ARMS.
>>
No. 667524 ID: dd338c
File 144149388876.png - (111.44KB , 800x800 , 423.png )
667524

"Does the SHEER IDEA of DESTRUCTION BY CHOP sound IDEAL? NO. It shall by by SHEEMUS. CHOP shall merely be the JUDGE, and LUMEI and LOVEGNOLL the GRAND AUDIENCE. The BATTLE BEGINS NOW."

SHEEMUS and the INSTUCTOR meet on the ROCKS OF FIGHT, and engage in GRUESOMELY DETAILED POLITENESS.
>>
No. 667525 ID: dd338c
File 144149389711.png - (131.38KB , 800x800 , 424.png )
667525

This BOWING OF FRIENDSHIP molds into HALF ENTHUSED FIGHTING. However, upon A VARIOUS NUMBER OF SECONDS, this then TRANSFORMS ITSELF into a MILD TUSSLE.
>>
No. 667530 ID: dd338c
File 144149478238.png - (155.11KB , 800x800 , 425.png )
667530

LOVEGNOLL claims they are on EVEN GROUND.

HOWEVER. With CHOP'S SQUINTING TECHNIQUE, it can be seen that SHEEMUS is SLIGHTLY LOSING. She does not have the heart for BATTLES OF SPECTATION, only the BATTLE FOR LIVES. At the current BATTLEPACE, SHEEMUS shall be the LOSER.

>"What's the point of this anyway, Chop?" the SO CALLED INSTRUCTOR remarks MIDCOMBAT. "Even if I win this fight, I know your recruits are strong, you wouldn't allow it any other way! You didn't have to get them to beat me up to prove it."
>>
No. 667537 ID: 57dfcc

>At the current BATTLEPACE, SHEEMUS shall be the LOSER.
Perhaps she needs to be inspired?

>What's the point of this anyway, Chop?
The battle is as much a lesson for Chop's students as it is for the instructor.
>>
No. 667540 ID: 3663d3

you fight and lose until you win. training makes you strong but you can only learn to fight by fighting. to shy away from the low risk fights puts you in danger of the real ones.
>>
No. 667543 ID: e114bc

>>667527
The teacher should always be stronger than the student! This is to demonstrate that weak teachings cannot produce strong students. Tell him that Sheemus is not your strongest student, and if Lumei were fighting here, he would have lost already.

Speaking of which, SHEEMUS, WIN. Treat it like a battle of LIFE OR DEATH. He is the ENEMY, you must DESTROY HIM.
Threaten punishment for losing. Like maybe she has to eat breakfast that you prepare for the next week.
>>
No. 667549 ID: d90668

Its not about proving my recruits are strong. Its testing you to make sure you are strong enough to be trusted with training our people.

If you do no know enough about fighting and physical training its means that any training from you would be worse than nothing.

Its better for pupils to think they are weak and run from danger than to have a false sense of confidence and run into fights that will get them killed.
>>
No. 667556 ID: bb78f2

>>667530
CHOP is APPLYING MEASUREMENTS.
MUSCLE SCIENCE CANNOT BE APPLIED when one SIDE of the SCALE is NOT ACCURATELY MEASURED.
BEHOLD, STUDENTS! Your first lesson in MUSCLE SCIENCE.
>>
No. 667569 ID: dd338c
File 144150366411.png - (113.19KB , 800x800 , 426.png )
667569

"To PROVE to the INSTRUCTOR OF FLABBY ARMS that the INSTRUCTOR CANNOT TEACH THAT WHICH CAN BEAT HIM, as well as APPLYING MUSCLE MEASUREMENTS."
>"That's not actually true, Chop! But nevermind that, I didn't really want to teach your recruits anyway!"
"Then why has THE VISION OF CHOP'S RECRUITS INSIDE OF THIS VERY ROOM met with CHOP'S EYEBALLS?"
>"I actually just wanted to teach the villagers! But your Chieftain said that I had to prove I could get the good word from your recruits first before I could teach normal cave denizens here."
"And you wish to RECEIVE THE GOOD WORD of THOSE WHO BEST YOU IN COMBAT? SHEEMUS, treat this battle as LIFE OR DEATH, as LOSING SHALL BE SUBMITTING TO CHOP'S PUNISHMENT."
>"I don't make the rules! You once visited my town, and you were really strong, but we couldn't be that strong! We had to farm and hunt and do all kinds of stuff, and I started teaching there to maximize our fighting power for what little training we could afford in a day. And we got pretty decent, you know? We can't match up to fighters here, but we're way stronger than the average cave denizen here, too! And that's who I wanted to train!"
>>
No. 667572 ID: dd338c
File 144150393751.png - (93.08KB , 800x800 , 427.png )
667572

SHEEMUS pins the INSTRUCTOR with NEWFOUND VIGOR.

>"So, I don't think you proved anything to me! I'm not here to get your recruits, I'm here to make the average cave denizen able to at least defend themselves if it came to it!"
>>
No. 667581 ID: d90668

I have no problem with that plan. I just wanted to test your capabilities and see what your training was like.

If you want you can join my students and learn from me. Then you can take my training methods and soften them so that the normal bolds will not run away in fear.

Plus any of your students can come join my dojo if they want to continue there training and take it to the next level.
>>
No. 667585 ID: 845d4d

The point, as in all fights, is to test oneself and one's opponent! If one intends to ever enter battles with lives on the line, one must know oneself, one's capabilities and limits, to their utmost. The only way to know these capabilities and limits is to have been pushed to them, and thus every fight, even one such as this, becomes a fight for the knowledge that may save yourself and your comrades.

Every fight is not only against one's opponent, but against oneself! You must know if your arms cannot lift a certain weight, if your legs will collapse after a certain effort, if your heart will not bear with you against a certain amount of fear! For if you do not know these things about your body, then one day your body's failings will be the end of you or your friends. A warrior's weaknesses are their deadliest enemy! So, when a true warrior trains, they train like they mean it! And when they fight, even if one of their opponents is only a friend helping them to learn about themselves, then still they must fight with all their strength against the other deadly enemy who is always with them!

Which means that EVERY FIGHT IN WHICH YOU DO NOT TRAIN, LEARN ABOUT OR TEST YOURSELF is ONE IN WHICH YOU HAVE LOST. And if you did not put forth your full effort, you are BOTH LOSERS.

CHOP already had the notion that the instructor could teach those who lack the time or inclination to become TRUE WARRIORS. It is clear to Chop, however, that CERTAIN PEOPLE in these caverns had begun to wonder if this lesser training would also be capable of creating TRUE WARRIORS, and that therefore if it would be possible to NOT TRAIN WITH CHOP. It was the intention of CHOP to make it clear that this is not the case.

Also Chop was OFFENDED THAT ALL THIS TOOK PLACE WITHOUT CHOP'S INFORMATION OR CONSENT. The instructor could have MET WITH CHOP AND HAD THIS LESSER TRAINING PLAN APPROVED WITHOUT ALL THESE SHENANIGANS, and the fact that CERTAIN PEOPLE went BEHIND HIS MIGHTY BACK indicates both their GUILT and their LACK OF RESPECT.
>>
No. 667586 ID: e114bc

>>667572
Tell him you agree with his hopes. This training competition was pointless and misleading.

However he really should put a little more physical exercise in his regimen.
>>
No. 667603 ID: 57dfcc

>>667572
I doubt my recruits will be entirely pleased you were less than fully truthful with them.

Tell him you have no complaint with the cave bolds getting better, but your students are ordinary cave denizens.

Instruct Sheemus to explain all the ordinary cave denizen stuff she does in addition to her training.
>>
No. 667676 ID: ea0ad9

>"So, I don't think you proved anything to me! I'm not here to get your recruits, I'm here to make the average cave denizen able to at least defend themselves if it came to it!"
A teacher should be STRONGER than those he considers his STUDENTS. Chop will TOLERATE SUCH TEACHING if the teacher TAKES THE TIME TO ADVANCE HIS STRENGTH. Whether he does so with CHOP'S TEACHING or HIS OWN ROUTINES is of NO CONCEQUENCE to Chop, so long as he ALWAYS SEEKS TO MAINTAIN HIS STRENGTH.
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No. 667744 ID: 840526

That sounds fine to me.
And at east your honor is intact, that is important too.
But what he is planning is good, it will save you the time of having to put everyone through basic training as well. So you can focus on the training of real warriors instead...
(And maybe if they've already gone through basic training they won't be quite so feeble when you get them.)
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No. 668466 ID: dd338c
File 144176247163.png - (141.28KB , 800x800 , 428.png )
668466

"CHOP'S STUDENTS are CLASSIFIED as ORDINARY DENIZENS. Perhaps even CAVE MAGGOTS."
>"Well, sure, they - er, are ordinary denizens, now, but you're going to make them into tough warriors!"
"CORRECT. Perhaps CHOP can AGREE to this IDEA OF BLASPHEMY of HALF WARRIORS. BUT. Did the INSTRUCTOR OF ILL FORESIGHT not think to ALERT CHOP TO ITS PRESENCE?"
>"That, uh, that surprised me. I mean, to do this, I'd go to your chief, right? And I mean of course you'd want to know too definitely for sure! But I would have thought that your chief would have let you know! Or your students, for that matter."
"And the LESSON OF TODAY IS THE INSTRUCTOR BEING INCORRECT. Now, CHOP SHALL PRESENT EXTRAORDINARY ISSUES, and the INSTRUCTOR shall DEFEND THE HONOR OF THESE ISSUES. ISSUE ONE. The INSTRUCTION that the tiny one before me supplies has LITTLE TO NO PHYSICAL EXERTION."
>"I was thinking about that!"
"DO NOT THINK ABOUT THAT. DO ABOUT THAT."
>"Right, right! This place is different! At my home, we were all so tired at the end of the day, it was all we could do to train any more. Or at all. But here, even as though things get, there's more room for physical exertion! I could include more."
"This COMPROMISE shall create CHILDREN instead of BABIES. TOLERABLE for the PRESENT TIME."
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No. 668467 ID: dd338c
File 144176248298.png - (98.23KB , 800x800 , 429.png )
668467

"ISSUE TWO. The TEACHER must be STRONGER THAN THE STUDENTS."
>"Oh, yes! Well, no. I still disagree, but! I'm willing to deal with that and fight anyone who wants to graduate. But even if I can't beat a single one of your pupils, I can beat the various villagers who might want to train."
"ACCEPTABLE. ISSUE THREE. COMMUNICATION should be that of LOUD GIANTS, not PEBBLE lost in CENTER OF GROUND. AS A RESULT, CHOP'S HONOR has been SUCCESSFULLY DEFENDED after requiring NO DEFENDING, amongst OTHER SURMOUNTABLE INCONVENIENCES."
>"I don't have any excuse for that, I'm sorry, Chop! I'll be sure to let you know personally about anything that is even a little related to your dojo in the future."
"ACCEPTABLE IN THE FUTURE. FINAL ISSUE. AVERAGE CAVE DENIZENS may FOOLISHLY BELIEVE that the NEW INSTRUCTOR'S HOBBY TRAINING can create FULL WARRIORS without undergoing FULL CHOP TRAINING."
>"No, no, no! Not at all! I was going to finish on that note, but now I'll say to everyone right away, that it won't be any kind of replacement for Chop's training, it'll just be manageable for the people who want to learn how to defend themselves as best they can while also devoting their best to other stuff in the day."
"CHOP contains FORMIDABLE APPREHENSION. HOWEVER. It is a FULLY KNOWN FACT that CHOP does not perform INSTANT DENIAL of that which RAISES HIS EYEBROW. CHOP shall ENTERTAIN YOUR IDEA>"
>"Really?! Ye-"
"AT THE AGREEANCE THAT CHOP CAN SMASH THIS HALF TRAINING AT ANY POINT."
>"That's fine, that's fine! I just want one chance, and I'll give it my best! Anything else you'd want me to do?"
"PROVE YOUR WORTHINESS by ENGAGING IN CHOP TRAINING."
>"Are you kidding? That's basically my life dream outside of teaching myself! As long as I get some time off to teach myself, I'll be sure to work twice as hard when I'm learning from you to make up for it."
"THESE WORDS of yours have PROVEN THEIR STRENGTH to LIFT CHOP'S EYEBROWS BEYOND PREVIOUS ELEVATIONS. HOWEVER. ACCEPTABLE."

With this RARE OCCURRENCE OF CHOP GENEROSITY, the TALKING has NOW DIED, and CHOP must engage in FUTURE ACTIONS for any REMAINING DUTIES.
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No. 668468 ID: 57dfcc

>>668467
Well, I guess remedial training for babbies is now a thing. Welcome to kobold kindergarten kiddos.

Hmm. Is there anything to do besides continuing training? Now we roped rockeater and puny instructor into it too.
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No. 668544 ID: e114bc

>>668467
Did we decide on a specific magical training schedule for Lumei? Also, do a strength test right now to see if she can break through her psychological barrier now that she's experienced being stronger than she is.

One issue, if Basic Instructor participates in Chop Training, won't he start to get too strong for his students to beat him and thus graduate? Or was that like, for students that want to graduate early?

Lastly... get some recipes for your own use that use your ingredients but don't taste like fire. Because variety.
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No. 668596 ID: 78923e

I think the CHIEF needs to be given a sound LASHING to provide him a lesson on ADEQUATE RESPECT, as well as ADEQUATE PROVISION OF INFORMATION TO HIS PROFESSIONALS on MATTERS OF THEIR PROFESSIONAL SUBJECTS.

This lashing shall be METAPHORICALLY GIVEN WITH TONGUES, but should still metaphorically STRIP THE FLESH FROM HIS BONES. He should by now heard of all SHENANIGANS, and should be vulnerable to the knowledge that they stem ultimately from his NOT CONSULTING CHOP before SUBVERTING CHOP'S AUTHORITY to permit something which EVIDENTLY CHOP WOULD HAVE PERMITTED HIMSELF. The Chief appears to be under the impression that the mighty Chop is somehow UNREASONABLE.

WHERESOEVER THIS MYSTERIOUS IDEA CAME FROM IT MUST BE DESTROYED.
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No. 668627 ID: 91ee5f

>>668467
I think Lumei should get an increase in rank, because out of all of the new recruits, she's the one with the most experience and deserves a rank increase! She'll be one rank above the new guys, but still far below Stasrubis and Chop.

(Like how in real life, some martial arts have belt colors to show rank. I think Lumei should get the next color up! Or whatever Chop's idea of "next rank up" is.)
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No. 668629 ID: 91ee5f

>>668627
Also, don't forget about the agreement you had with Shabin!
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No. 668686 ID: 840526

That sounds fine to me! And you get to teach the teacher, so everyone should know the proper order of things. As is only proper.
Sounds like it is almost all sorted out...just a loose end or two to clear up right?
You have to help a certain rock eater now I do believe.
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No. 668719 ID: dd338c
File 144184810270.png - (102.69KB , 800x800 , 430.png )
668719

>One issue, if Basic Instructor participates in Chop Training, won't he start to get too strong for his students to beat him and thus graduate?
There is NO GRADUATION from INTENSE STUDY AND EFFORT.

ONLY QUITTING.

>I think the CHIEF needs to be given a sound LASHING to provide him a lesson on ADEQUATE RESPECT
This LASHING shall be in the form of INTENSE CHOP TRAINING.

>Increase Lumei's rank
By VIRTUE OF VALIANT EFFORT, LUMEI and SHEEMUS are now known as LUMEI AND SHEEMUS instead of PUNY AND DAINTY NAMES that CHOP shall NOT EVEN BOTHER TO RECALL.

"The EVENT known as TODAY shall now COME TO A CLOSE. TOMORROW. The ROCK EATER and the INSTRUCTOR shall meet alongside the RECRUITS to be TAUGHT IN THE WAYS OF TEACHING at MORNING."
>"Okay! I'll be there."
>"By the way, when he says morning, he means about an hour before dawn." LUMEI whispers the STRATEGIES of NON-TARDY WARRIORS.
"LUMEI shall have a SPECIAL TRAINING REGIMENT involving THE SAME AMOUNT OF PHYSICAL LABOR as well as MAGICAL MUSCLE TRAINING."
>"Yes sir." LUMEI RESPONDS.
>"Yes sir." PRINCESS RESPONDS
"BOTH SHALL SAY SO AGAIN with less than the EIGHTY PERCENT FEAR CONTENT THAT LUMEI HAS SENT TO DIE WITHIN CHOP'S EARS."
>"Yes, sir!"
>"Yes, sir!"

CHOP is under the impression that the CHIEF believes CHOP to be UNREASONABLE.

OTHER PRIORITIES REMAIN, but at a FUTURE TIME, CHOP shall SHOW THE CHIEF an UNRELENTING ONSLAUGHT OF BEING REASONABLE.
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No. 668720 ID: dd338c
File 144184813032.png - (131.42KB , 800x800 , 431.png )
668720

The next MORNING that is the HOUR BEFORE DAWN has arrived. ALL RECRUITS and NEW RECRUITS are ON TIME.

"Is the ROCK EATER PRESENT?"
>"Uh, yeah, I'm right behind you."
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No. 668721 ID: dd338c
File 144184817960.png - (163.84KB , 800x800 , 432.png )
668721

"ONE HUNDRED PERCENT INCORRECT. Is the INSTRUCTOR PRESENT?"
>"Uhhhhhhhhhh yes? Sir?"
"TWO HUNDRED PERCENTAGES OF INCORRECT. The two PILES OF MALLEABLE FLUFF that LIE BEFORE CHOP'S EYES neither INSTRUCT NOR EAT ROCKS WITHIN THE DOJO."

What shall their NEW TRAINEE NAMES BE, such that they may EARN THEIR TRUE NAMES WHEN THE TIME COMES?
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No. 668724 ID: ea0ad9

>What shall their NEW TRAINEE NAMES BE, such that they may EARN THEIR TRUE NAMES WHEN THE TIME COMES?
PUPPY and SASSFANG.
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No. 668725 ID: bb78f2

>>668721
The INSTRUCTOR will be known as LAMBCHOP for being a SOFT SHEEP WANNABE CHOP

ROCK EATER will be known as... actually I have nothing. She's tough. I mean, she has some HAMLEGS but CHOP does NOT CALL OUT HAM-SHAPED LEGS. FLUFFYPANTS I guess.

But no seriously, damn girl, she got the ham legs.
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No. 668727 ID: 7debe0

LAZYBONES, who believes gratuitous resting should be part of one's training regimen, and FUSSYFEET who loves to get into other people's business and cause them great inconvenience.
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No. 668728 ID: 57dfcc

>>668721
Rock eater shall be FLUFF EARS.

The instructor will be WHISPERWEIGHT. He has not yet earned the right to be even a LIGHTWEIGHT.
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No. 668793 ID: 13fcf9

Wannabe 1 and wannabe 2, the first one wants to be a trainer and the second wants to be a knoll.
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No. 668795 ID: c54703

I support SASSFANG for former Rock Eater. The instruction aspirant shall be the SNOOZETUTOR.
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No. 668928 ID: 136820

I see we have our two new recruits, DORK SOFTPUNCH, and SORE ROCKSMASH.
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No. 669330 ID: dd338c
File 144211994078.png - (110.07KB , 800x800 , 433.png )
669330

"THIS ONE wishes to LAY INSTRUCTIONAL PATHS towards becoming SOFT SHEEP-LIKE WARRIORS. THEREFORE, it shall be known as LAMBCHOP. THE ONE with FLUFFY PANTS shall be called SASSFANG."
>"That is a really lucky name to get." I hear the WHISPERS from the PEANUT GALLERY OF OLDER RECRUITS.
"There is NO LUCK. Although it OWNS THE ESSENCE OF MAGGOTS WITHIN THE DOJO, it is known that the DOJO is to SUPPLY WARRIOR WORTH TO THE CAVERNS. Since SASSFANG has proven OVERALL WORTH to the CAVERNS, it is WORTHY OF DOJO ACKNOWLEDGEMENT. Furthermore, SASSFANG CLAIMED TO OWE CHOP A FAVOR."
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No. 669331 ID: dd338c
File 144211995494.png - (135.47KB , 800x800 , 434.png )
669331

>"Yeah, because I forgot I was already doing a favor with increasing the size of your recruits' shitty rooms."
"ACCEPTABLE FAVOR. As such, TRAINING FOR NEW AND OLD RECRUITS BEGINS NOW UNTIL FOREVER."
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