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File 126515947866.gif - (8.07KB , 800x600 , 960.gif )
123921 No. 123921 ID: c593ec

Once, after my exile, when I lived alone in the woods near Iniziare Citta, I witnessed a man stalking through the forest.
His eyes were moist with tears, focused on some distant thing beyond his mind, a deadly stare with no present recipient. He wore upon his tired frame tattered old clothes all stained with a wash of crimson ripples, and his boots were worn through to nearly nothing. Across his throat he bore a scar like a collar, a defiant band standing against the force of death itself. And in his arms he carried a weapon like an axe, and this bit of glimmering steel which caught the light as a zephyr's hair shone high above his ragged countenance, the only item on his person fresh and clean.

And I asked the man, "What are you doing in these woods?"
And he replied simply, "Hunting bears."
334 posts omitted. Last 100 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 128484 ID: 5a2e05

>>128465
BADASS
>>
No. 128486 ID: 8f1880

>>128465

Holy shit you're in color now!
>>
No. 128487 ID: afefc4

Muschio in color...on Update number 1000!
>>
No. 128488 ID: c593ec
File 126568977885.gif - (8.39KB , 800x600 , 1001.gif )
128488

>"You? Ha! You couldn't be the ruler of my hairy ass! Now fuck off! I ain't tellin' you again, asshole!"
"You are making a most unwise decision."
>>
No. 128489 ID: 3416ec

>>128488

That does it. You kick his ass.
>>
No. 128490 ID: 67c611

If he makes a move knife his wrist to make him drop the knife. After striking him there put it up to his neck to make a point. Make him bow to you before he leaves.
>>
No. 128491 ID: 0e252b

>>128488
It's clobberin' time.
>>
No. 128492 ID: aa5284

You look like a mugger, honestly. Oh well. Just cut him and take the girl. She's flat as a board, but you wouldn't want to sex the fat guy.
>>
No. 128493 ID: 632862

>>128488
"Especially since while talking to me, the woman has run off."

When he turns around, smash him in the back of his head with the dagger pommel.
>>
No. 128494 ID: c593ec
File 126569038295.gif - (8.58KB , 800x600 , 1002.gif )
128494

The man is clearly drunk, and stumbles at me with all the coherency and aim of a paper airplane in a maelstrom.

I slam him in the back of the head with the dagger's pommel and he goes down like a load of bricks.
>>
No. 128495 ID: 8ce2bf

>>128494
Strip him of his clothes while asking the girl about the nature of the medicine.
>>
No. 128496 ID: 632862

>>128494
Well that was easy. Now find the woman.
>>
No. 128497 ID: c0f3bf

Now find that girl.
>>
No. 128498 ID: 3416ec

Nice!

Now address the girl about this "misunderstanding."
>>
No. 128500 ID: d97d76

Poke him just to be sure. These hostile characters have a way of regaining consciousness at the most inopportune of moments.
>>
No. 128501 ID: 67c611

A reminder guys. We want loyal subjects, not corpses. If we can get him to accept that we are stronger and agree to serve us then we gain more than killing him would.

Establish dominance then show compassion.
That is how you get subjects.
>>
No. 128503 ID: 476456

Play a little good cop, make it look like you're on her side, the elicit the truth from her.
>>
No. 128504 ID: d97d76

Someone drunkenly accosting a little girl does not strike me as a prime specimen for a reliable follower.
>>
No. 128506 ID: 67c611

See if you can wake him up and make sure he is ok. Tell him that we could have killed him and chose not to because we would rather be his friend. Reiterate that we are his lord whether he likes it or not. We will not forgive him if he attacks us again. Send him back to town and tell him to remember our name.

Before all that answer this: Are you a good lord or a bad lord? Will you serve the people as your father did or will you suck the land dry like a parasite?
>>
No. 128507 ID: 817cd3

>>128506
I don't think we should honestly care about this fellow's opinion of us before we have dealt with the lady. He likely is alive for now, if he wishes to remain so he will not test our patience.
>>
No. 128508 ID: 934ef5

>>128507
I just don't want this drunkard going around saying he was accosted by "Muschio Malto", he isn't yet quite in the position to be making a name for himself under THAT name.
>>
No. 128510 ID: 2dd482

>>128494
a paper airplane in a maelstrom.

but how does muschio know what airplane is?
>>
No. 128511 ID: c593ec
File 126569145753.gif - (7.58KB , 800x600 , 1003.gif )
128511

The drunken catfolk is out cold, so I approach the little woman, who looks relieved at the way the situation is resolving.

>"Jeez, thanks! You really saved my ass!"
"I'm not done here. Can you tell me more about what this was about?"
>"Oh, sure thing! Yeah, I sold this guy and his friends some herbs. They were having a party, see? And they wanted something to give 'em... you know, sort of an extra kick. See? And anyway they were already drunk, so when they didn't feel anything right away, they all turned on me for givin' them bunk drugs. But I would never!"
"Are you an herbalist?"
>"Well, no. Actually, I'm a witch doctor!"
"You mean witch doctress?"
>"Eh, I don't think that's a word."
>>
No. 128512 ID: 67c611

What species is that?
>>
No. 128513 ID: c0f3bf

"Can you do anything about... burns? Possibly missing eyes?"
>>
No. 128515 ID: aa5284

>>128512
Mudkip.
>>
No. 128516 ID: d97d76

That's not a smoke bomb or something she's taking out of her bag, is it? Best to err on the side of caution here.
>>
No. 128517 ID: 3416ec

>>128513

"I see. Would you happen to know of anything that could cure severe burns and scarring? I am willing to compensate."
>>
No. 128518 ID: 817cd3

"Should have used Nanroot... it mixes well with alcohol in my alchemical experience."
>>
No. 128519 ID: 67c611
File 126569182927.gif - (36.59KB , 421x544 , mudkip1.gif )
128519

>>128511
>>
No. 128520 ID: 632862

>>128511
We could also ask her about the Fang Necklace, or any magic users she knows of. If her skills seem suitably impressive, we could even offer her a job.
>>
No. 128522 ID: c593ec
File 126569222256.gif - (8.39KB , 800x600 , 1004.gif )
128522

I draw my blade again, in case of a surprise attack. She startles.

>"Whoa! Calm down, mister, I'm just getting my hat."
"I apologize, but I try to remain cautious."
>"Well, yeah, I understand. Anyway, hey, thanks again. If you need anything -- y'know, ipspim, weezleaf, nanroot, hopweed -- I could return the favor."
"Actually, do you know anything about treating burns? Rather severe ones."
>"Sure do. There's a reason 'witch doctor' contains the word 'doctor', you know."
>>
No. 128523 ID: 67c611

We've got a girl who is missing half her face. Can you work with that?
>>
No. 128525 ID: 3416ec

>>128522

"Excellent. Perhaps you can return the favor sooner than later."

I'm more concerned about the 'witch' part, actually.
>>
No. 128526 ID: d97d76

>>128510
Those dwarves, my friend. Those dwarves.
>>
No. 128527 ID: 3416ec

>>128526

Well said.
>>
No. 128528 ID: c593ec
File 126569282511.gif - (8.25KB , 800x600 , 1005.gif )
128528

"Very well. I have an ally who has been grievously scarred by burns in a recent accident. If you'd come along, perhaps you can repay the favor sooner rather than later."
>"Oh hey, sure thing. I'm always lookin' for work. This isn't one of those rape things though, is it?"
"...what?"
>"You know. 'Oh hey, I got a sick friend. Come into my windowless hut so you can take a look at him'. That sort of thing."
"...I assure you, it is not."
>"Okay, well, I'm good to go then."
>>
No. 128529 ID: d97d76

>>128528
WHAT DID I JUST FUCKING SAY
>>
No. 128530 ID: 632862

>>128528
Kick behind you.
>>
No. 128531 ID: c0f3bf

Kick behind you to the left.
>>
No. 128532 ID: 67c611

Pissed guy behind you. Cut that asshole's throat.

[ponder rape scam]
>>
No. 128533 ID: 9d07d9

Jump to your right.
>>
No. 128534 ID: 3416ec

BEHIND YOU!
>>
No. 128535 ID: 784974

>>128528
do not lower your guard, watch your back
>>
No. 128536 ID: a1ac99

>>128528
Guy behind you, kick your left foot straight backward.
>>
No. 128537 ID: 817cd3

>>128528
Sidestep, stomp!
>>
No. 128538 ID: aa5284

So, uh... you get raped a lot?

...Do you... do you MIND?
>>
No. 128539 ID: 632862

>>128528
psst, that hat looks to be a familiar shape, but I can't tell for sure. We should get a good look at it before leading her to the Vault.
>>
No. 128542 ID: f44349

>>128528
Kick behind you very sharply with your left leg.
>>
No. 128545 ID: c593ec
File 126569359263.gif - (10.81KB , 800x600 , 1006.gif )
128545

"Fantastic. Let's move along then. But first, I'd like to introduce you to my associate, Ashedel."
>"Hiya!"
>"Nice to meet you, Ashedel, Mister Malto. My name's Marjani Openda, but you can call me Ona."

"Well then. Shall we be on our way?"
>>
No. 128546 ID: e050d6

stick your dick in ona
>>
No. 128547 ID: 67c611

Kill him. He doesn't know when to quit. You should show him when.
>>
No. 128548 ID: 3416ec

Be on your way.

But keep Ona at an arm's length. Also, don't show her the amulet.
>>
No. 128549 ID: 632862

>>128545
Hmm, maybe I was wrong about the hat. Proceed to the Vault, then.
>>
No. 128552 ID: aa5284

Threesome.

Or, ride Ash bareback to the cave.
>>
No. 128558 ID: c593ec
File 126569496319.gif - (8.79KB , 800x600 , 1007.gif )
128558

"This is it."
>"...you live in a dungeon?"
"Yes, quite impressive, isn't it?"

>"...are you sure this isn't one of those rape things?"
"Yes!"
>>
No. 128560 ID: 67c611

>>128558
If you'd like, I can make it one of those rape things. But otherwise.....no.

[ps you are lying about the no.]
>>
No. 128561 ID: d97d76

She's going to walk in on the Princess and get a VERY wrong impression, isn't she.
>>
No. 128562 ID: d6a592

how often does she fall for that rape trap thing she keeps talking about
>>
No. 128563 ID: 476456

"It would be rude to ask if you often get accosted but uh.."
>>
No. 128564 ID: c0f3bf

Tell her nobody will try to rape her. Seduce you can't promise.
>>
No. 128565 ID: 34470e

>>128558
Uh, what will she think of Dompag?
>>
No. 128566 ID: 632862

>>128558
Let's make sure she doesn't find out about the prisoner.
>>
No. 128567 ID: aa5284

>>128558
Do you WANT it to be?
>>
No. 128569 ID: aa5284

What's her name, anyway?
>>
No. 128570 ID: 3416ec

"Look, I'll leave the door ajar if it makes you feel any better."
>>
No. 128571 ID: c593ec
File 12656955004.gif - (12.84KB , 800x600 , 1008.gif )
128571

>"Say, this place is a lot nicer on the inside. Real homey."
"See, I told you there was nothing to worry about."

>"So, you just need me to take a look at this one burnt friend of yours? If that's all it is I won't charge, on account of you saved my ass back there."
>>
No. 128572 ID: c0f3bf

Nudge her off the trapdoor a little...
>>
No. 128574 ID: 67c611

"Now that you mention it that ass does look worthy of saving."
>>
No. 128575 ID: 8ecfd4

>>128571
Try to convince her to stay longer. Having a witch doctor on your team gets you both magic and a doctor. And Mushio, try to learn some more magic, if you can learn the fire trick you should be able to learn other stuff. One never knows when they could be useful.
>>
No. 128577 ID: 632862

>>128571
That, and maybe she can help identify the Fang Necklace, or tell us where we can find leads on practitioners of whatever the guy was doing.
>>
No. 128578 ID: 3416ec

Lead her to Tislomer. Don't ACCIDENTALLY LEAD HER TO THE PRINCESS THUS SCARING HER INTO RUNNING AWAY REALLY FAST BUTTERFACE.
>>
No. 128581 ID: c593ec
File 126569598963.gif - (13.35KB , 800x600 , 1009.gif )
128581

"Well, depending on how things work out, we may be able to offer you a more permanent sp-"
>"WOW! Check out this room, it's huge! Hey, how many people live here?"
"Let's see... in addition to myself and Ashedel, we have one goblin, two kobolds, an ogre, and -- er, a few others. Mostly workers. About a dozen total."
>"Nice place, but the tile could use a little work. It's a little loose, and I bet some polish would make it look great."
"Well, we do our best to keep things in order as it is."
>>
No. 128582 ID: 67c611

Yes, polish her ass good.

[wave of inappropriate thoughts being sent your way. Enjoy :D]
>>
No. 128583 ID: 632862

>>128581
...the storage room is open AGAIN. Do go check in there to see if the invader came back again.
>>
No. 128584 ID: f44349

>>128581
Somebody left a door open.
...Why does that feel so foreboding?
>>
No. 128585 ID: 3416ec

>>128584

FORBOOOOOOOODE.

Investigate open door. We shall not have drafts in out magnificent lair.
>>
No. 128592 ID: 67c611

DAMNIT MUSCHIO, RAPE THAT BITCH ALREADY SO I CAN GO TO BED!
>>
No. 128595 ID: 3416ec

>>128592
Shaddap.
>>
No. 128597 ID: 817cd3

>>128592
Hey now we are running a nefarious lair here... not a bordello or some harem.
>>
No. 128601 ID: 1d375b

We could have a rape cave installed off to the side. A few chains and some oddly shaped furniture would set the mood. Also could pass it off as a gym.
>>
No. 128604 ID: c593ec
File 126569726321.gif - (5.39KB , 800x600 , 1010.gif )
128604

"Babrakus! What's that door doing ajar?"
>"I'm just installing th -- BOSS? Oh god -- boss! Don't move! The entryway's trapped!"
"What are you talking about?!"

click
whk
KHKHHH
WHOM


>"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"
>>
No. 128605 ID: 1d375b

Quick disable the new rape pit!
>>
No. 128607 ID: 632862

>>128604
OHGOD. Freeze and look to see if anyone got hurt.
>>
No. 128608 ID: 34470e

>>128604
FFFFFFFFFFFFF WE FORGOT ABOUT THAT! APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY!
>>
No. 128609 ID: 817cd3

>>128604
Fuuuu...
>>
No. 128610 ID: 44ca1b

whoops!
>>
No. 128611 ID: 67c611

STATUS RAPEORT! I MEAN SEXES REPORT! FUCK.
>>
No. 128612 ID: c593ec
File 126569745916.gif - (11.30KB , 800x600 , 1011.gif )
128612

>"AAAAAAAHHH! OH GOD! RIGHT IN THE TACO! HNNNNGH!"
Oh dear.
>>
No. 128614 ID: e53249

>>128612
I hope she got medicine for that!
>>
No. 128615 ID: 632862

>>128612
"...I'm gonna have to pay you for the treatment now aren't I."
>>
No. 128616 ID: 817cd3

>>128612
Well... at least you didn't walk into that ehh Muschio?... I think the lady is going to need a place to lay down (make sure Dompag doesn't bother her) also... find out what the new trap layout is.
>>
No. 128617 ID: 75b578

A giant swinging fist at dick punching height? Compliment Babs.
>>
No. 128618 ID: 1d375b

Oh right we did mention needing one of those awhile back. Compliment Babrakus on a job well done.
>>
No. 128619 ID: aa5284

Nothing a home remedy of RAPE can't cure!
>>
No. 128621 ID: d97d76

Might as well offer her a lie down.
>>
No. 128623 ID: 34470e

>>128612
Um um tell her that someone tried to steal something that was in here, so Bab made a trap for people who would try and steal stuff. And tell her not you. Then apologize profusely.
>>
No. 128624 ID: f44349

>>128612
No more working on projects without TELLING THE BOSS ABOUT THEM.
Agreed?
>>
No. 128625 ID: f5c892

You should probably inspect her taco to make sure it's alright.
>>
No. 128628 ID: c593ec
File 126569809563.gif - (4.58KB , 800x600 , 1012.gif )
128628

>"YOU JACKASS."
"Um... would you like to lie down somewhere?"
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