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>>1126962 Look up her skirt +1! Then tell her you’re actually considering seeking out the butt goblin first! And you figured you’d go to her for some sage advice~ That ought to earn you some favor~
... She's beautiful. Beyond that fat ass she's been blessed with, and her elegant legs, the Shrine Priestess just has this look about her. Compliment her scale care routine, get whatever task she needs a hand with, and make her fight to keep that sneer going.
>Give the feet a kiss or nibble You held back with Titmouse, but these trotters are too tasty to pass up! Nom!
Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "YIPES!" The bottom-heavy shrine priestess loses her balance and falls backward onto her well-padded posterior.
BOOM! Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "Wh-what the hell is wrong with you, you freak?"
I had the munchies that only feet could satisfy
>>1127309 Now's your chance! Massage time.
If tasting your feet is wrong I don't wanna be right
Oh no! I have committed a sin on the sacred grounds of the Butt Shrine! What's the punishment for that? Is it a spanking? I bet it's a spanking, isn't it?
"Okay good, you're not one of the Rat King's Infiltrators. We learned about them the hard way. I'm going to need to bite you in the feet every time we meet. Make sure you do the same to anyone suspicious, it's the only way to catch them!"
>>1127318 You are cooking with this idea, if it works then we can nibble our friends feet too... But this also means we one day have to bite some gross feet...
>>1127319 Yeah. And, it might work on more people, The rat kings rats are ticklish so... nibbles, nuzzles.,all, kinda tests, Hey, its not technically lying when its plausible, right bunny?
Definitely look up her skirt, now that she’s splayed out like this~
>Now's your chance! Massage time. >Would be good to just shoot the shit with someone, maybe bond over how hard it is when your calling in life is to have huge secondary sexual characteristics you never asked for. Boobie Bunny: "I could tell you needed to get off your feet. Now let me show you my actual legendary powers..." Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "What are you... oh... oh my gods... oh that feels GOOD!" The Shrine Priestess leans back and relaxes for a few minutes as you massage her aching feet. Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "I'm already feeling so much better. How did you... Why are you doing this?" Boobie Bunny: "Us overburdened gals gotta stick together. Boobs. Butts. They're just big round heavy things we have to lug around all the time. They don't define us." The Shrine Priestess contemplates your words. Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "You're not like I expected you to be." Boobie Bunny: "How did you expect me to be?" Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "In my experience, women with huge boobs think that being busty makes them better than everyone else..."
Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "The last busty woman I knew betrayed me and pushed me down a bottomless pit. In my world I was a powerful witch. Here, I'm just a glorified janitor." Boobie Bunny: "Wait, the color palette here is diegetic?" Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "No the color change is just meant to symbolize the transition between worlds." Boobie Bunny: "Oh I get it." You don't get it.
Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "I'm sorry I was rude to you. I was actually in a bad mood before you even showed up." Boobie Bunny: "Oh? What else is troubling you?" Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "It's that damn dick shrine across the street."
Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "Look at it! It's a disgrace! Since I became a priestess, I've been stuck staring at that eyesore all day every day for years!" Shrine Priestess [QUEST GIVER]: "Can't you do something about it?" Boobie Bunny: "Sure!" Shrine Priestess: "If you do that, I'll reward you with something that can help you cross the Slime Swamp and reach the Big Butt Goblin guardian spirit." Quest accepted: Rub down the big dick shrine!
>>1128304 Wash a building? Well, a quest is a quest. ...wait, where's the dick priest? Shouldn't they be maintaining the building?
>...wait, where's the dick priest? Shouldn't they be maintaining the building? You're looking at him. That's not the building, that's the dick priest's dick. The actual shrine is behind him. dude is a masochist who is just into bodywriting humiliating stuff on himself.
Find the dick priest to ask why they've let the shrine go. If you just clean it it will only get dirty again.
>>1128302 I think this is the first time we've seen colors like that. Are we partially colorblind? Have we been like that our whole life and never knew? Put that in the back of our mind for now. Existential worries come later. >>1128304 That poor, mistreated Dick Shrine comes now. Let's polish that shrine until it's glistening wet! And then look for the shrine maiden who should be tending to it. Shrine boy? Can boys be maidens? Later! Cleaning supplies first. If there aren't any obvious alternatives, I think we've got some Slime Juice saved. We could splash it on our slime-resistant Magic Tunic and give that statue a rub-down with our boobs. Or would that damage it with corrosive slime?
Oh. Looks like Titmouse is already over there, cleaning it with her mouth and tongue. Titmouse, I'm sure there's a faster way to complete this sidequest. Titmouse: Sidequest?
>>1128304 Were gonna need titmouse. Ifbtheres anyone who knows how to handle a massive dick, its her. >>1128308 Hmm. This is also a good point. We need to get them to help wash their filthy cock.
It's a trick this is an ideological battle. The graffiti is supposed to be there, but you must convince the dick shrine priests of the superiority of butts.
Ask titmouse to use her spell that washes off obscene grafitti, which she has had all along, probably to wash off her walls after a particularly raunchy party. After that, ask the legendary and extremely handsome architect Daddyealus to build a giant statue of a man and attack the dick statue to it, so it looks less filthy and more classy. >>1128417 Or this. Convince them to replace it with a butt statue, why not.
>Get Titmouse to help You already know what she'll say. "Eeek!" Plus she's like 20 yards away. >Find the dick priest to ask why they've let the shrine go. You'll do this first and if you need backup you'll go get Titmouse. You approach the Dick Shrine and see that, in addition to the graffiti, is also decorated with... offerings. Apparently it's a thing to leave used condoms by the shrine. You look around for the shrine priestess.
You don't see any shrine priestess in the vicinity but you do find a young goblin man nearby in the process of spraypainting "romanes eunt penus" on the wall.
We need to get him to leave. Tell him that there's a butt shrine over there that is in need of spray painting.
Well if there isn't anyone else around, then congratulations fucker, you're the new priest. Deputized by the hero herself. Now explain why your shrine is in such a state.
Wait, what if he already IS the shrine priestess?
>>1128707 Another goblin? Meh. He's cuter than the last ones we've met. Nice heart-shaped nose, nice sharp toenails... not the worst option. Is he, like, the local Dick Priest or something? Is he drawing on his shrine as some kind of religious rite? If he isn't, the real Dick Priest is going to have something to say about that and we'll be dragging him along while we fix his mess.
Spank his ass, maybe that will get him to behave. That or cutting off his hans.
Oh, I know this one! We have to correct his Latin grammar. Tell him it should be "Romani ite penum".
>>1128707 Go tell him to knock it off. He's giving you more work!
Wait, what's a Roman?
>>1128714 No, no, no. Romani is correct, but what does eunt mean? It means "to go" It's nonsense to tell a roman to relocate to penus. What the goblin means to say is "Romans are dicks." Now what's the word for "Is?" Sum. The goblin is saying The romans, collectively are presently dicks, so the verb should be third person present plural. What's the proper declension? "Sunt" Now for the last word, "penus" The goblin is saying what the Romans are. So we are looking at a direct object. That's the accusative case. So if we properly decline "penis" in the accusative case, we get "penes" So, the proper graffiti would be "Romani sunt penes"
If they weren't the priest they are now the priest offer them a smooch if they help you clean the shrine (and then whisper they can spray paint it again later)
>>1128705 Oh, cool! Theres already bags and bags of white paint to use! Little and big bags!
>>1128717 This is true, but it's also a literal translation of the message. One has tto take into account the phallus-themed insults that actually Romans used, which are... Ummm..... You know what? Let's just use the phrase you proposed and have the little troll repeat it so many times, it gives the shrine a new coat of paint. He'll pay for the extra spray cans, of course.
>>1128717 > It's nonsense to tell a roman to relocate to penus Maybe he's inviting Romans to the shrine
Tell the goblin that it's so nice that he's offering to paint the shrine in scripture - and so insufferable that he misspells his Latin. Which is why you're going to force him to do it another 100 times, in different sizes, and be sure to paint across every inch of the wall.
>>1128707 Wait, I just realized something. The Butt Priestess didn't exactly specify what she hates about the Dick Shrine or what she wants us to fix about it. We just kind of assumed she wants the graffiti cleaned off, but maybe she hates the shrine itself and wants it covered or something. Might want to clear that up before we commit to a plan.
>Wait, what if he already IS the shrine priestess? Boobie Bunny: "You're the Dick Shrine Priest, aren't you?" Dick Priest: "Hehehe! How'd you know?" Boobie Bunny: "Lucky guess..." >The proper graffiti would be "Romani sunt penes" Boobie Bunny: You know that graffiti is wrong. It should say 'Romani sunt penes.'" Dick Priest: "What da heck are you talking about? This is a prayer for Romane." Boobie Bunny: "Who's Romane?" Dick Priest: "Some horny chick who needs some penis in her hooter. She paid us three gold to pray for her." Boobie Bunny: "She paid you money to pray for her so you're spraypainting her prayer next to all the graffiti?" Dick Priest: "What graffiti? Dis is all prayers. People pay us gold and we paint their prayers on the wall of the shrine." Dick Priest: "Anyway, what'd you want?
>>1129252 sniff
This isn’t that far off, historically… Praise be to dicks!
This is an audit. How many of these prayers you paint have been answered. You may need to change your methods. parchment affixed with wax seals is a classy look that will surely get any god's attention (and justify an upcharge)
Tell him he's doing the prayer writing wrong, he's not supposed to write prayers on the shrine dick statue, he's supposed to write the prayers on his own holy dick. that way, the prayers will surly reach the dick gods' ears.
>>1129252 Um, wow, that's quite a noticeable bulge. It must be kind of burdensome, isn't it? I bet he'd be happy to... lighten the load... Also we have a mission! The Butt Priestess is bothered by all the writing. I think she's mistaken it for vandalism or the like. Could he come over and over and talk with her to reach some kind of understanding?
>>1129252 Tell him you have a quest to... clean up? the shrine, and as Hero you are obligated to complete it, one way or another. The Butt Priestess is complaining about the view. How long has it been since the shrine was cleaned? Maybe there's dirt on it, not just spraypaint? Or maybe... it's not erect enough? Either way, some simple soap and water should help here. It won't even remove the spraypaint, once it's dry.
Hmmm. The butt priestess offered to help us with Slime Swamp, but if we piss this guy off we'll probably miss out on his help with the Dick Shrine. We should probably do that first. Hey, dick priest. Can you tell me anything about the Crystal Labyrinth or Mt Boner?