1/3 Buckwheat 2024/03/28(Thu)19:40 No. 1087343 ID: 15a025
File 171168003288.png - (7.09KB , 800x800 , 1.png )

“George! George! We’re outta wood for the stove!”
Ugh, he’s on the sofa watching football.

“Oooh! Down all the way on the ten yard line! So close!”

“George! Do you want dinner or not! Go chop some wood for the fire.”

He starts to turn up the volume.

“The home TEAM ISN’T TAKING THAT ONE LIGHTLY! COULD THEY-“

“GERORGE I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR-“

Oh who am I kidding. That lazy good for nothing is going to be glued to the tube all night.

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/03/28(Thu)19:40 No. 1087344 ID: 15a025
File 171168004776.png - (7.90KB , 800x800 , 2.png )

I go outside and grab the ax. Fine by me if doesn’t want to eat, I’ll do it all myself. Should be some dry logs to chop in the shed.

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/03/28(Thu)19:41 No. 1087345 ID: 15a025
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I go to pull out my key and notice the doors open. That fool forgot to lock up again. You know someone’s gonna steal -

“OUR WOOD!”

Some filthy crook stole all our wood!

Recall why you can't divorce your husband.

Put a cover on the ax, though. You don't want to go to jail for manslaughter.

Alright, thats the last straw. Time to cut the tv wire to get his attention and have a screaming match with your husband.

Afterwards, we'll call the police.

Who steals wood?! Well, either start chopping a tree or start chopping the shed

Just how angry are you exactly?

Well woodn't you know.

Who wood do such a thing? I'd say log a complaint with your husband, but he'll just stick to the couch. You'll just have to solve this yourself. Investigate for clues so you can catch the punk (wood so decayed as to be dry, crumbly, and useful for tinder)

>>1087345
Hi there!
We're probably the voices of your rage induced psychotic episode!
It's likely we're here to help, or at least try!
Oh neat, you've already got an axe!

Lets see, what to do... what to do...
Oh!
>>1087347

This is a good one!
But maybe he'd just drive to the nearest bar and watch the game.
So!
Get every car and vehicle key you have, get the one you're going to use, start it up, cut the tv cable two times and take the bit you cut free with you as you drive off.

He'll be left at home stewing and you'll be hunting down the dumb asses who stole wood from the wrong doe.

Say.
Whats your name?

>>1087354
>Say.
>Whats your name?

I hope her name is Jane...

Jane Doe...

I think George might want to hear about this one. It's gonna be cold watching the end of the game if there's no wood for the stove. Sounds like it's about time he started helping out, too, and this gaffe of his might be a good impetus to rattle his bones.

>>1087345
"GERORGE WE HAVE BEEN ROBBED"

See any unfamiliar tracks in the snow? Tell George to follow them.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/03/29(Fri)17:12 No. 1087408 ID: 15a025
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>Recall why you can't divorce your husband.
Till death do us part….as tempting as the thought might be some nights, he has his qualities. Hell if I can remember them right now.

>cut the tv wire to get his attention
I think George would cut me right at the neck if I tried to pull something like that. No way we could afford a new one either.

>call the police.
They don’t run the phone lines this far outta town.

>Whats your name
>I hope her name is Jane...
>Jane Doe...
Oh Jane Doe was my Grandmama, bless her heart

My name is Gretchen.

>See any unfamiliar tracks in the snow?
> Investigate for clues so you can catch the punk.

Well I see some weird lookin boot prints. Certainly not mine or George’s. Weird lookin thin line going out in the woods.

…

“THEY STOLE THE DAMN WHEELBARROW TOO!?”

> I think George might want to hear about this one.
> Tell George to follow them
Ugh, all he probably wants to hear is the home team win tonight.

>Just how angry are you exactly?
ANGRY ENOUGH TO TRACK DOWN THIS WOULD BE WOOD THIEF!

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/03/29(Fri)17:12 No. 1087409 ID: 15a025
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There’s two sets of tracks… One’s head north west-ish. The other’s going north-east with my wheelbarrow. Which one we after first?

Wait. Wonder if I should at least tell George what I’m up to first though?

Oh they're wily foes, but no matter. Nose to the ground you can follow their scent!

Well one track is going TO you and the other is leaving with the wood and the wheelbarrow!

logically, the left tracks are the person who went to the shed, and the second is after they left with the WHEELBARROW.

Don't tell your husband. He's not gonna listen. It'd be a waste of time. But you're definitely not gonna make him any dessert tonight.

Take your axe with you. Thief could be armed.

But if you have a shotgun, take that instead of the axe. You feel like the type of person who's household has one.

If you have a shotgun as another suggested, it would be a good idea to bring that along, otherwise, an axe is pretty formidable.

Definitely follow the wheelbarrow trail too, the other set of tracks is likely the thief's original tracks towards your shed, shaped that way too.

Just shout to George from the door to let him know where you'll be. Then follow the barrow trail.

>>1087409
Well, keep the axe at least.

Shout through the doorway
"Be right back deerest, im going to reclaim our property and defend our home. Catch up if you FIND YOUR RACK YOU SPINELESS COUCH HOG! My mother was right about you!"
I mean, i dont know if your mother said anything about him, but she probably did and shes probably right.

Which tracks...
Well, youll catch up with the wheel barrow thief quicker. Theyll be burdened and you do need to find it.
The other tracks will be their origin point.

Yeah, we must focus our rage on calling out George on being a lazy sissy.

Tell him that other men are encroaching on his territory and he is letting them touch his wood. That'll make him eager, I mean angry!

>>1087409
Tell our husband we have been robbed

>>1087409
Follow the wheelbarrow. Worst case scenario, you get the wheelbarrow.

If George is really so uncaring, then he won't mind if you just step out for a while--no need to say anything.

It looks to me like the tracks without a wheel rut are pointed this way, and the tracks with the wheel rut are leading away. If your goal is pursuit, then follow the set that took the wheelbarrow with it.

Buit be careful. You don't know if this thief is a bold or a coward, and how dangerous the thief might be to a pursuer. Consider also motive: who would be stealing firewood? You need to recover the wood, but there may be room for compassion for the thief.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/03/30(Sat)22:28 No. 1087498 ID: 15a025
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>Just shout to George from the door to let him know where you'll be.
>"Be right back deerest, im going to reclaim our property and defend our home. Catch up if you FIND YOUR RACK YOU SPINELESS COUCH HOG!”
>Yeah, we must focus our rage on calling out George on being a lazy sissy.

I take a quick jog back to the front door and shout out to.
“George my deer! I’M GOING OUT TO DEFEND OUR HOME AND RECLAIM OUR WOOD! FEEL FREE TO COME HELP WHEN YOUR RACK GROWS BACK YOU LAZY SOFA SLEEPER!”

George: “What!? Speak up or come inside woman!”

Gretchen: “WE’VE BEEN ROBBED AND I’M GOING OUT TO TEACH THEM A LESSON! FEEL FREE TO HELP OUT WHEN YOU DECIDE TO GROW SOME ANTLERS AND GET OFF YOUR ASS!”

George: “Yeah yeah! If you’re not home after the game I’ll come pick you up, have fun and shut up deer! Game’s back on!”

>f you have a shotgun, take that instead of the axe.
>If you have a shotgun as another suggested, it would be a good idea to bring that along

I don’t have a shotgun, but George does. He keeps it locked in the gun safe though, and I’m not to touch it. Not like a could anyway, don’t know the combination. I’ll have to carry on with my axe.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/03/30(Sat)22:30 No. 1087499 ID: 15a025
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>logically, the left tracks are the person who went to the shed, and the second is after they left with the WHEELBARROW.
>the other is leaving with the wood and the wheelbarrow!
>Follow the wheelbarrow. Worst case scenario, you get the wheelbarrow.

Makes sense. Even if this is two different crooks, I should go after the wheelbarrow! Hopefully when I find it, it’s got my wood in it still.

I start walking through the woods and follow the trail. Start to recognize where they’re going too. There’s a little river up head-

*Snap*

I freeze in place, only to realize it was just me. Stepped on a twig.

Wait, there’s someone up ahead by the river…

What in the frozen hills is that thing!

I take cover behind a tree and look down. Damn it, the tracks are going right pass them!

Can’t tell what they’re doing either. That creepy lookin mask is hiding their expression pretty well. Are they alerted? Did they hear me? What are they standing around for anyway! Looks like they got a knife out.

No use in pondering, more time I waste. More time they have to do find me. What should I do?

Oh lucky you. Looks like you're getting in on the ground floor for the Legend of the Clown Mask Killer.

Don't do anything hasty. Is this the sort of thing the local youths would do as a prank? Or should you be going back for that shotgun right about now.

Arm yourself with the axe, and tell them to put the knife slowly on the floor.

you have a longer ranged weapon, you should be fine if he comes at you.

A couple other things: what if they murdered someone and used your wheelbarrow to move the body? Wouldn't explain where your wood went though...

Also, just so you know, if they were able to leave tracks, you are likely leaving tracks too, and they are most likely leading to your hiding spot. You're most likely going to be spotted if you stay here, unless you want to confront them.

Oh, crud. It's the local evil cult here to get recruits again. They probably took the wheelbarrow to indoctrinate it.

Do the wheelbarrow tracks go past the masked fellow? If they do, we may have to just go up there and ask about it. Jeep the axe at hand, though.

Axe it a question: do you want summa this?!

>>1087499
Well, youve still got your axe and youre also armed with a lifetime of untapped fury, so no need to worry.

For all we know this is some local kid obsessed with circuses practicing their knife throwing in secret.

"Nice scarf. Really makes the whole juggalo of the woods look come together."
Heft the axe, casually as they respond just to remind them its there, then ask if theyve seen a deadman with your stolen wheelbarrow.

CULT OF THE TREE

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/03/31(Sun)11:28 No. 1087527 ID: 15a025
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>lucky you. Looks like you're getting in on the ground floor for the Legend of the Clown Mask Killer.

Yeah, lucky me. Hopefully I want get the role for dead body six feet under the ground.

>Is this the sort of thing the local youths would do as a prank?
>For all we know this is some local kid obsessed with circuses practicing their knife throwing in secret.

Can’t say there’s really a local anything living out here. Town’s ‘bout an hours way drive. I guess it’s a good spot for some circus guy practice in secret, if they wanted to.

>Axe it a question: do you want summa this?!
>Arm yourself with the axe, and tell them to put the knife slowly on the floor.

I ready myself with the axe and jump out.

“Alright clown, drop the knife! What are you doing out here on my property!”

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/03/31(Sun)11:29 No. 1087528 ID: 15a025
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They stand perfectly still, unmoving. No motion at all. Completely unchanged. They’re still holding the knife.

“I said, DROP THAT KNIFE, CLOWN!”

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/03/31(Sun)11:29 No. 1087529 ID: 15a025
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They quickly toss it, but I manage to dodge!

Looks like he’s got more too! How am I going to close the range between us?

Uh oh. I think this might not be a clown. It's a mime!!

He tried to kill you. Hack him until he can't move.

Plenty of trees to duck behind to block knives. Just need to circle around and get behind progressively closer trees until you're within leaping distance

nail him in the face with a snowball to blind him long enough to get close.

>>1087537
Aye, disrupt their sight so you can close distance.

>>1087529
Smack tge nearest tree with the back of your axe.
The impact shpuld dislodge a cascade of snow for initial, immediate cover then you can duck behind a tree and arm yourself with a snowball from the ground while in cover
What the others said is true.
Something to throw back and let you close distance is important.

>>1087529
Use the trees as cover to approach. Use the flat of the axe to hit him, see if you can disable him and get that mask off in case it's some kind of mind control device.

It doesn't matter if this guy is a clown or a mime or a dancer or a prancer, don earnest fury and blitz him. Imagine he's your husband: rude, often neglectful, and spitting in Cupid's face to ignore his wife for all these years. A vixen like you deserves better, and you know it. Show how your powerful legs make you a swift dasher, and rush in to bring your righteous anger down like a comet upon him.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/06(Sat)15:19 No. 1088091 ID: 15a025
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>nail him in the face with a snowball to blind him long enough to get close.
>Smack the nearest tree with the back of your axe.
The impact should dislodge a cascade of snow for initial, immediate cover

Might be a bit tricky to pull off, but I’ve got no better alternatives.
I take the flat end of the axe and bash it into a tree. A big pile of snow crashes down and I take cover to the next.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/06(Sat)15:19 No. 1088092 ID: 15a025
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I’m able to pull this off once more and I knock the fucker out from behind!

>>1088092
Let's unmask this fiend!

This is distracting you from the wagon thief! What's this joker up about anyway?

Take their knives away and see if you recognize their face.

>>1088091
Beautiful work.
Prance over through the snow and buck him up...

>>1088092
...just like that!

Pull the mask of, but dont forget to get their knives away from reach.

Now that he is knocked out, drag him to your shed and tie him up. We are going to interrogate him.

If this isn't the thief that took your wheelbarrow, then maybe don't spend too much time bothering with him. Take the mask off, sure, but if it's no one you recognize, just leave him in the snow and keep after the wheelbarrow tracks.

Buckwheat 2024/04/07(Sun)18:02 No. 1088214 ID: 15a025
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>Let's unmask this fiend!
>Take their knives away and see if you recognize their face.

I grab the knocked out clown dog and rip the mask off.
No idea who this is, but it looks like I ain’t the first one to rough’em up. I pocket one of his knives and start scattering the rest in the snow. Have fun looking for those, jerk. Hope you poke your pads on one.

>If this isn't the thief that took your wheelbarrow, then maybe don't spend too much time bothering with him.

More time I waste on this clown, the further the real wood thief has to get away. Oooh when I catch up to whoever tried pulling this ‘heist’, they’re gonna wish all I did was knock them out with an ax!

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/04/07(Sun)18:02 No. 1088215 ID: 15a025
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I keep following the trail and the tracks stop over by some makeshift house. Well, more of a shabby cabin than a house. Where’s the wheelbarrow though! Tracks just end with none of my stuff in sight!

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/04/07(Sun)18:02 No. 1088216 ID: 15a025
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Oh. Oh is that smoke coming out of the chimney! THEY BETTER NOT BE BURNING MY WOOD!
How am I going to go about confronting this jerk?

Completely reasonably. Break down their door with your axe.

Axe the door open and scream "HEEEEEEEEERE'S GRETCHEN!"

You see a shabby cabin, I see getting your wood back plus interest.

Axe that door and glare inside.

>>1088216

Best peek througn the window before you go all jack nicholson.
Youll feel bad if its, i dunno, a pack of vagrant orphans or some other desperate folk.

Still getting your wood back but need to know how much gretchenrage to tap for the job.

>>1088226
This, basically. They also might be armed or something.

>>1088216
If the wheelbarrow isn't here then you can't guarantee this is the house of a thief. Let's not do any permanent damage. Knock on the door rudely and demand they let you in.

Looks like whoever this is is used to dealing with deer. Discretion will be the better part of valor here, I think. There might not be much chance for sneaking, though; if there's a fire already lit, then it must be someone cozying in to hunker against the cold. Once the target is alerted to your presence, there's no going back; when you enter, enter with gusto, prepared to fly straight at your adversary.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/08(Mon)18:31 No. 1088319 ID: 15a025
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>Best peek through the window
Looking at the window up above the door, they’ve got the curtains closed. I see another window on the side of the cabin, but they got that blocked with curtains as well.

>Looks like whoever this is, is used to dealing with deer.
Now why’d you have to go an put it like that. Those antlers are lot more chillin now.

>Break down their door with your axe.
>Axe the door open
>Once the target is alerted to your presence, there's no going back; when you enter, enter with gusto, prepared to fly straight at your adversary.

I’d rather charge in aggressively on the off chance the thief does end up being hostile. If it’s someone desperate for help, I can at least apologize and explain later.

I get a quiet feel for the door knob first. It’s locked as expected.

I smash my ax as close as I can into the side with the opening, pry as much as I can and crack the door open.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/08(Mon)18:32 No. 1088320 ID: 15a025
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I rush in to see another creep in a mask. They have a big knife and almost throw it at me before I can get a word out, they slam it into the counter though.

???: “Shut what’s left of that door and sit your ass down. It ain’t safe out there.”

I-what?

???: “Shut the door! You’re letting the cold in damn it!”

Not exactly sure what’s going on yet, but I let my hoof slip behind my back and try my best to close it.

Looking into the room, they’ve got a stove going. Something awfully bitter smellin boiling in their pot.

Lots I want to say and ask, but I get the feelin I better be careful with my words.

“did you take my wheelbarrow of firewood?”

>>1088322
What else is there to say?

>>1088320
"Where's my goddamn wheelbarrow. Where's my firewood. Why are you a plague doctor?"

If youre mad enough, ask them if theyd think it was cool for you to hang plague doctor scalps all over your house because those damn antlers are really insensitive.

Nice stove he's got there. Plenty of wood in it.

>>1088320
>>1088335

Oh.
And ask why its dangerous out there.
Or, if you feel like racking it up a notch
Respond with "I know it was dangerous out there but im in here now too."

>>1088320
Ask where your wheelbarrow is, and all your wood.

Nyaah, what's cooking doc?

"What's with you people stealing wheelbarrows and throwing knives at me?! I'm so angry, I'm going to show what for!"


Rip the bandaid on this guy's leg off!

Don't rip the bandaid off. That's just cruel.

Buckwheat 2024/04/09(Tue)18:21 No. 1088412 ID: 15a025
File 171271206968.png - (7.49KB , 800x800 , 18.png )

>ask why its dangerous out there.
Gretchen: “It’s dangerous out there? Well it’s about to get dangerous in here!”

Plague Doctor: “If you think you pose a threat to me, you’re mistaken.”

Plague Doctor: “To answer though, there’s a group of harvesters lurking around these parts.”

Gretchen: “A harvester? You mean a combine.”

Plague Doctor: ”This really is the sticks… They’re a group of ruthless carnivores who- hmm…“

Plague Doctor: “Who… ‘harvest natural products’ from us herbivores.”

Gretchen: “What do you mean by ‘natural products’?”

Plague Doctor: “Skin and blood, bones if things go south.”

Gretchen: “Then just say they eat us! Don’t pussyfoot around the question.”

Plague Doctor: “Oh no no. That would-“

Gretchen: “Look, I don’t care about some violent wolves or a bear running around.”

>“did you take my wheelbarrow of firewood?”

Gretchen: “Did you run off with my wood and wheelbarrow?”

Plague Doctor: “Yes. I needed wood for the stove to-“

Gretchen: “To what? Shack up inside and hide?”

Plague Doctor: “Well, to an extent. I have-“

Gretchen: “I don’t care what you have to do or need. I want what’s left of my wood so I can go home and make my stew!”

Plague Doctor: “I am trying to-“

Gretchen: “Trying to give me back my wood and wheelbarrow? You’re not doing a good job at that.”

Plague Doctor: “INJURED. PATIENT. MAKING MEDICINE!”

>>1088412
Tell him you still need your wheelbarrow. Where is it.
Also you want to see the patient, so you know he's telling the truth.
Also if it was that important he could've just ASKED YOU.

...wait, ask how much wood he took. Maybe that other set of footprints was another thief who grabbed a bunch of wood by hand.

>>1088412
Do harvesters like circus masks?
Cause i might have met one.

Lets see this patient.

Oh, and dont they teach you how to knock at plague medical school or is it a silly mask heavy curriculum?
He could have asked and maybe got some help instead of a doe with an axe and a vendetta.

>>1088412
...And you clearly didn't think to ASK like a halfway decent being?!

Ugh.

WHY. NOT. ASK. THEN?
Doctor seems unprepared for a confrontation they should have been expecting, seeing as they stole a wheel barrow full of wood THROUGH THE SNOW

So these harvesters, they don't happen to wear masks do they? Like the one you're wearing?

"...Fine. Pay me for the wood. I'll order takeout."

>>1088432

Do they have cell service out here in the godforsaken snow-covered backcountry?

Medicine's fine anyway. But you're going to have a hard time surviving the winter without any wood. So he's curing one critter, by dooming two more. You can't just cut more wood either; that stuff needs to dry for a year at least.

He did take all the wood right?

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/16(Tue)17:47 No. 1088976 ID: 15a025
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>Do they have cell service out here in the godforsaken snow-covered backcountry?
Cell service? Are you trying to say shell service? We have a shell station couple miles down the road. I mean, I guess if we got cold we could gas up and stay warm in George’s truck. Not gonna help warm up a stew for dinner though.

>could've just ASKED YOU.
>dont they teach you how to knock at plague medical school
>you clearly didn't think to ASK like a halfway decent being?!
>WHY. NOT. ASK. THEN?
Gretchen: “Then why didn’t you just knock on the door and ask!?”

Plague Doctor: “If you had several dangerous folk hunting you down, would you knock on a random stranger’s door for help?”

Gretchen: “I…”

It’s a shitty point, but I don’t think I can really argue against that.

Plague Doctor: “I only took a wheelbarrow full of wood to get through the night. If you need it back, then take it. If you want to be a stickler about the wood, I have a small bit of cash but you’re not getting it back. I saw how much you had stored.”

Gretchen: “MY SHED IS EMPTY!”

Plague Doctor: “Maybe you should invest in getting a lock for your shed then. I only took one load. Don’t have the time or safety to keep running back and forth hauling wood.”
Plague Doctor: “Every second I’m outside, every set of tracks I leave, is more time and clues they have to catch me.”

>Do harvesters like circus masks?
>So these harvesters, they don't happen to wear masks do they?
Gretchen: “Okay, what do these assholes even look like? Do they run around wearing creepy clown masks?”

Plague Doctor: “Well, they do conceal their faces. Clown mask? Why do you ask?”

Gretchen: “Some clown dog bozo attacked me with throwing knives on my way here.”

Plague Doctor: “I can’t say for certain, but consider yourself lucky to make it here.”

>Also you want to see the patient, so you know he's telling the truth.
>Lets see this patient.
Gretchen: “Alright, I want proof. Show me the patient, doc.”

Plague Doctor: “See to them yourself if you desire. I need to keep watch on my stems.”

Gretchen: “Where are they?”

Plague Doctor: “Just walk downstairs into the basement.”

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/16(Tue)17:50 No. 1088977 ID: 15a025
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I grumble to myself and start stomping down the stairs. Not too bad, could make a decent storm shelter down here or something.

I find deer in rough shape sitting on a bed.

Patient: “I-who are you? ”

Gretchen: “Just an angry wife looking to get her fire wood back. I take it you're the patient?”

Patient: ”I- wait are you an actual doctor?”

Gretchen: “I-no? Do I look like a doctor?!”

Patient: ”Look, I don't know why she let you down here, but you need to get me out before we’re both trapped!”

they look to be in pretty rough shape to be running off anywhere. Ask them trapped by whom, the doctor or the harvesters?

>>1088977
Bite wounds. She's probably delirious from whatever it is. Go back upstairs immediately, ask what she's infected with.

I think it's worth asking for the patient's story now. The plague doctor is confident enough to give you free access to the patient, so let's make good on it, and confirm their stories jibe. The bite marks might suggest there's truth to the risk of predation tonight.

Bummer about that firewood, though. If we really want it back, then talking to these strangers is turning out to be a dead end. If there are theives still out there, they're getting away, and we should leave now to pursue a different set of tracks in the snow.

>>1088977
Theres a good chance you're about to hear a door close and lock behind you now gretchen, so you might as well ask for her story.
Lets hear from the deer.
Find out who the buck stops with.

Buckwheat 2024/04/28(Sun)14:14 No. 1089933 ID: 15a025
File 171433887469.png - (8.69KB , 800x800 , 21.png )

>She's probably delirious from whatever it is. Go back upstairs immediately, ask what she's infected with.
Gretchen: “I’m gonna go grab the doctor, you don’t look like you’re doing too well.”

Patient: “N-don’t! Please, get me out of here!”

>they look to be in pretty rough shape to be running off anywhere.
Gretchen: “You don’t like you’re in shape to be running anywhere. Look, the doctor upstairs is-“

Patient: She’s not a doctor! Not the kind that’d help anyways.”

>I think it's worth asking for the patient's story now.
>you might as well ask for her story.
Gretchen: “Alright then, what’s the story here? Door wasn’t locked or anything when I came down. If you wanted to leave, why haven’t you?”

Patient: “I-I’m too weak to run or resist; I’m starving and thirsty. She let’s those wolves in here and takes my blood! They bite me- and- and..."

They get down on their knees and start begging

Patient: “YOU GOTTA GET ME OUTTA HERE!”

>>1089933

So.... blood harvesters? Vampires? People who think they are vampires due to being insane?

The plague doctor guy warned against 'harvesters' though. He trying to play both sides or something?

Sneak back upstairs and knoc the doc out. Hold out here for the night.

No way is that story true. This patient is a recently-turned vampire and the doctor is trying to cure vampirism. If the patient's story was true the doctor would not have let you down here. Let's just go get the wheelbarrow and the rest of the wood.

She has bitemarks aplenty.
That could back up her story or indicate an attack and infection.

No one is being completely straight with you gretchin.
Thats gotta be making you angry.
Angrier.

Dont let her close to you.
Just incase.
Time to see doctor snootmask.
What theyre doing when you sneak back up should be interesting.

Ask what her "treatment" entails.

God dammit you didn't come here for all this shit. Where's you wheelbarrow and the rest of you wood!

Now if she's telling the truth then the only reason the doctor would let you down here is to trap you. So if you can just walk right back up then this lady is probably suffering paranoia or schizophrenia or something. Either way you're not a doctor, so nothing to be gained yammering down here.

At this point, if you stay here any longer, you're gonna need to be ready to stay here for the rest of the night, because your wood is getting away. You can go up before you get locked in here, too, and ask the "doctor" to comment on the patient's story, but you don't have to stay any longer than you feel like, if you can't get any more wood back here. I'm curious to know if the wolves the doctor lets in here wear masks, though; ask the patient about that before ditching to go back upstairs.

Whatever's wrong with them, they need a real doctor. Some quack in the woods isn't curing anything.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/05(Sun)19:09 No. 1090402 ID: 15a025
File 171496136557.png - (194.05KB , 500x500 , 22.png )

>So.... blood harvesters? Vampires? People who think they are vampires due to being insane?
>No way is that story true. This patient is a recently-turned vampire and the doctor is trying to cure vampirism.

There’s no such thing as vampires. Though that doesn’t really stop others from believing in them I guess.

Gretchen: “This isn’t some kind of vampire bullshit going or-“

Patient: “No, vampires aren’t real. They’re not real, right?”

Gretchen: “No.”

>Time to see doctor snootmask.
>What theyre doing when you sneak back up should be interesting.
>you didn't come here for all this shit. Where's you wheelbarrow and the rest of you wood!

Gretchen: “I’m heading back upstairs and getting to the bottom of this. I ain’t leaving without my wood.”

Patient: “P-please! Take me with you!”

I march back upstairs.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/05(Sun)19:09 No. 1090403 ID: 15a025
File 171496138220.png - (8.59KB , 800x800 , 23.png )

Gretchen: “Alright doctor snootmask or whoever you are. What the hell is going on here. I come here for wood and my wheelbarrow, and you show me patient with bite marks saying your friends with some wolves and taking his blood.”

Doctor Snootmask: “And now you’re here to stay under my care!”

This crazy quack comes out of nowhere and tries to jab me with a damn needle! I jerk my arm out of the way just in time.

>>1090403
I mean. There's only one real reasonable response to someone trying that stuff with you isn't there?
SHUT THEM DOWN.

>>1090403
really

Ok, enact violence upon the crazy person. You got your axe? Use it. Try not to inflict an immediately fatal wound, you probably want to interrogate her a bit to see what she was trying to do.
First target is her arms/hands so she can't inject you.

slap him in the face and sternly say NO!

smack that syringe with the flat of the axe. It will drop or shatter, and then its time for a mask pull.

Oh no! He was a mime all along!

Another experience in favor of clocking anyone wearing a mask on sight. Defend yourself, and clobber this cook. Might as well let that "patient" free when you're done up here, but you can't stick around. You've got wood to find and burn.

>>1090403
Axe is too unweildy for close struggles.

Time for the old angry one-two gretchin!
Grab their snoot and yank it so the eyeholes arent aligned right then Kick for the crotch,

Then grab nearest object and chuck it right at them.

Then get the distance to decide your next move.

You are a svelt, agile deer and doctor snootmask has robes and a restricted field of vision.

Use mobility.

I think they must not have heard you the first time, you're not here to stay under their care, you're here for your wood and wheelbarrow.

Maybe make that clear to them with your axe. You feeling choppy or smashy?

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/12(Sun)18:21 No. 1090819 ID: 15a025
File 171556329486.png - (156.90KB , 500x500 , 24.png )

>Axe is too unwieldy for close struggles.
>Time for the old angry one-two gretchin! Grab their snoot and yank it so the eyeholes arent aligned right then Kick for the crotch.
Right, lifting that thing up is leaving me wide open for needle jabbin. I ain’t putting my arms out to get jabbed either.

>You are a svelt, agile deer and doctor snootmask has robes and a restricted field of vision. Use mobility.
>Try not to inflict an immediately fatal wound, you probably want to interrogate her a bit to see what she was trying to do.
>grab nearest object and chuck it right at them.

I quickly prance over to the stove and chuck the pot at them! It makes a very satisfying clunk when it hits. I can hear the needle shatter too.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/12(Sun)18:22 No. 1090820 ID: 15a025
File 171556333921.png - (6.88KB , 800x800 , 25.png )

Gretchen: “What are you trying to pull here? What was in that needle, you mangy bag of robes?!”

Doctor Snootmask: “Heard your little conversation down there and had to act fast. Didn’t realize she was starting to come to already.”

Gretchen: “What was in the needle, and where’s my property?!”

Doctor Snootmask: “A little something to make you sleepy dear. You saw how my other patient is, she probably ain’t lastin much longer. Without her, I’ll have nothing left for the harvesters!”

Gretchen: “I- so you’re actually working for them? You know what, I don’t care. I just want my wood and wheelbarrow. Where’s it all at?”

Doctor Snootmask: “Out in my shed. Keep in mind, as night draws closer. So too will the harvesters.”

Not exactly dark out yet, still got an hour of light left maybe. Question is, am I just letting this quack off scotch free? Do I take their patient with me too?

Who cares about them. Just take the wheelbarrow amf wood. Then you can get back to dealing with your main problem: your husband

You just KNOW that you're going to encounter those 'I'm so crazy I think I'm a vampire and am also a dangerous, violent criminal who is in a gang of people just like me!' dumbfucks. Ugh. Might as well go get your property and return home, the sooner you can get you, your rightful property, and your dumb husband on one side of a bunch of locks and barricades, and leave all of this madness on the OTHER side, the better! Eyes and ears on a swivel, stay away from obvious ambush spots, move swiftly and with purpose, keep your weapon at hand.

>>1090820
The anger were feeling towards snootmask is justified.
Their victim isnt a patient.
Theyre being dispensed to the harvesters one bit at a time.

My initial instinct is to suggest that you:
Knock the doc out.
Tie them to a chair facing the door to the outside.
Rescue the victim.
Have them help start to recover the wood and cart.
Break the hinges of the front door with the axe sufficiently that the door hangs open.
Finish cart recovery and hustle back home.

Doc snootmask had someone trapped, without hope and knowing things were coming to feed on her.
Its only fair she experiences it too.

On a more practical side, when the harvesters turn up, theyll want their meal.
If left alone and secure doc will point them after you and ring the dinner bell.

Also, the patient will slow you down, and be a liability and someone you have to protect in your inevitable violent confrontation with this harvester gang. Besides, when you deal with them (because no one else around here seems competent, ugh), that removes the whole 'I must appease these criminals by doing crimes of my own rather than anything actually reasonable!' dynamic the quack has going on with their victim. Ugh. Aren't you supposed to live in a country with LAWS? And people with a monopoly on force to enforce them?!

Tie her up, let her 'patient' keep watch on her.
Hunker down here for the night. Wait out the rest of the night.

Later, since all this was the property of a mass-murdering quack anyway, you can sell it all on dbay and take a vacation!

>>1090824
I like the way you think. Leaving the fake doctor behind as a "meal" should allow us to shelter for the night elsewhere and avoid retaliation. Is there any rope anywhere though? If not, straight up killing the quack is what we'll have to settle for.
We can carry the patient in the wheelbarrow with whatever wood is left.

I don't think that killing the quack is necessary. Just knock the quack out and leave the unconscious body on the floor with its lumps. Take the wood, take the prisoner, and wheel them back home. If the harvesters show up there, they can answer to George. Either he shoots them, or they eat him and leave with full stomachs, and either way we come out ahead.

Inject him. Take his clothes. Replace the 'patient's clothes with his. Swap their places. Take the wheelbarrow and go back to your house as a ''prisoner''.

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/05/29(Wed)18:02 No. 1092050 ID: 15a025
File 171703096922.png - (295.14KB , 500x500 , 26.png )

>Knock the doc out.
>Just knock the quack out and leave the unconscious body on the floor with its lumps.
>Leaving the fake doctor behind as a "meal" should allow us to shelter for the night elsewhere.

Gretchen: “Time for a taste of your own medicine doc.”

I bash’em in the head with the blunt end of the axe. Should keep’em out cold for a bit.

>Tie them to a chair facing the door to the outside.
>Is there any rope anywhere
>Doc snootmask had someone trapped, without hope and knowing things were coming to feed on her. Its only fair she experiences it too.

Conveniently there is! I take a quick moment to tie this jerk to a chair.

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/05/29(Wed)18:03 No. 1092051 ID: 15a025
File 171703099576.png - (9.81KB , 800x800 , 27.png )

>Rescue the victim.
>Have them help start to recover the wood and cart.
>We can carry the patient in the wheelbarrow with whatever wood is left.

I don’t waste anytime, I yell down the stairs for them to come up and meet me outside.
They don’t protest, and by the time they’re outside I’ve already got what’s left of my wood in the wheelbarrow.

Gretchen: “Think you can get in the wheelbarrow and hold my ax?”

Patient: “I-what?”

Gretchen: “You wanna get out of here or what? You don’t look like you can run for long, so I’ll just have to push ya in the wheelbarrow.”

Patient: “With all that wood? H-how am I gonna fit?”

I groan and I lift her up in the wheelbarrow, and give her the ax. I grunt as I lift up the wheelbarrow and get a move on.

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/05/29(Wed)18:03 No. 1092052 ID: 15a025
File 171703102043.png - (6.36KB , 800x800 , 28.png )

As we make our get away, I start to notice the wheelbarrow tracks are fading. It’s getting harder to see.

Patient: “Oh, umm… excuse me. A-are we almost where you’re going? I-ah-ah’m-“
She let’s out a loud sneeze

Gretchen: ”Bless you…”

Patient: “It’s really cold.”

Well, if there’s anyone after us that sneeze probably alerted them. This poor sick deer probably isn’t going to last long in the cold either. I gotta get home quickly, but how am I going to find my way back?

>>1092052
If it hasnt snowed, your tracks should be visible.
Follow them back.

Just be careful the closer you get to the spot with the masked juggler you beaned on the way in.

>>1092052
You've got wood. Do you have anything that can light it on fire? She'll be able to hold the makeshift torch.

If you have even a little light you should still be able to find your way. Just keep an ear out for anyone stalking you.

In the Harvesters are anything to be worried about, then lighting a beacon may not be the best idea. Hightailing it home in spite of the patient's weak condition might be the best ticket, following the tracks while they last. I'm sure you can get at least to your backyard if you hurry, and from there you can go from experience.

If the patient is cold, maybe you can tuck them under some wood? Just pile it up on top? Might help keep a body in the wheelbarrow, too, instead of popping out on the first bump.

Let's burn a couple logs.

But we won't huddle next to them, oh no.

We are setting up an ambush. When the daddy-long-legs or whatever they were called come to investigate, we lay in hiding nearby and get them.

>>1092240

not a bad idea... waiting in ambush from some thorny thicket so they can't come at you from behind. You and the other deer can use your body heat to keep each other warm while you wait.

Makeshift torch works for keeping girlie warm. As for navigation… Follow the tracks as long as you can? They might be fading, but they’re all you have until they’re gone. Make that torch fast and then start hoofing it. (Y’know, cuz deer have hooves?)

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/06/29(Sat)21:40 No. 1093603 ID: 15a025
File 171972245846.png - (8.05KB , 800x800 , 29.png )

>You've got wood. Do you have anything that can light it on fire? She'll be able to hold the makeshift torch.
>If you have even a little light you should still be able to find your way.
>Makeshift torch works for keeping girlie warm.

YEAH! Had to take George’s matches away because he won’t quit smoking his pipe in the house!

I stop pushing and have her hand me a log and the ax.

Patient: “W-why are you stopping?”

Gretchen: “Getting hard to see my tracks back home and you’re gonna freeze at this rate.”

Patient: “Thi-this d-doesn’t look like a safe place to camp!”

Gretchen: “We ain’t camping out here, are you nuts? I’m chopping up a little torch for you to hold.”
I dig around my pockets for a match.
Gretchen: “You’re just in luck too, last one in the box.”
I run it across one side of the makeshift torch and light it.
I lay the ax back on her lap and give her the torch.
Gretchen: “Now careful not to drop it, last thing I need to be pushing is a burning wheelbarrow.”

I push on and on and on and on and on and on and on…

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/06/29(Sat)21:42 No. 1093604 ID: 15a025
File 171972254790.png - (135.72KB , 500x500 , 30.png )

Until finally we make it home.

I open the door and hurry her inside.

Gretchen: “George! George! Get in here and help!”

George: “Yeah yeah, I’ll get up when they cut to comm-HEY! Hey what did I say about surprise guests! Damn it, that better not be one of the in laws!”

You know what, I don’t have time for George’s whining. I gotta figure out or find something to patch this poor thing with. Now let’s see…what kinda remedies can I mix up to treat her? She's got bite wounds, gashes, maybe a cold?

>>1093604

Bite wounds, gashes... got any whiskey?

>Hey what did I say about surprise guests
Yeah well we're gonna have more any minute, there's a buncha nutjobs out tonight.

Just clean and bandage for now, disinfectant if you have it.

>>1093607

A bunch of psychopathically violent criminal nutjobs that think they're vampires! GET YOUR GUN!

>>1093604

Blankets. Heated blankets if you can get them heated quickly. Get some warm but not scalding mild herbal tea with honey in it for her. Clean and disinfect her wounds. Clean and bandage her. Get a fire going in the fireplace, set her in front of it. Get her a bunch of tissues and a bin for them. Get her a comfy chair she can relax and maybe doze in.

>>1093604
Clean out the wounds with high proof alcohol, and make sure you use CLEAN bandages too. You got a first aid kit? She may want some pain relievers too.

Oh, and you might want to think about barricading the doors and windows.

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:50 No. 1093616 ID: 15a025
File 171977703758.png - (1.26MB , 836x784 , 31_CRT.png )

>Yeah well we're gonna have more any minute, there's a buncha nutjobs out tonight.
>violent criminal nutjobs that think they're vampires! GET YOUR GUN!
SHIT! They could easily be following my tracks still!

Gretchen: “Damn it George! GO GET YOUR GUN! CRIMINAL NUSTJOBS COULD BE ON THE PROPERTY ANY SECOND NOW!”

George: “I SAID I WILL HELP OUT, WHEN IT’S COMM-“

Sports Announcer: “This is Patrick Stagg with ESDN, and we’ll be seeing you for the final quarter. Right after these sponsored messages.”

He mumbles to himself…

George: “Alright alright, I’ll go get the shotgun. If I don’t see anyone out there by the time the games back on I’m getting back in me chair!”

I whisper to the poor roughed up deer,
Gretchen: ”’Bout time he got up off that chair. He’s always like this on football night.”

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:52 No. 1093617 ID: 15a025
File 171977712521.png - (167.64KB , 500x500 , 32.png )

I take the poor thing into the other room and start digging around for anything helpful…

>got any whiskey?
No, that’s George’s. Not allowed to touch it, like I would anyway. Course it would be helpful now.

>Clean and bandage her.
>make sure you use CLEAN bandages too.
What, you think I’m dumb enough to give her used and dirty bandages? I get the first-aid kit and carefully dab over her snoot gashes with a alcohol soaked cotton ball.

Patient: “Oou! Ah! Ssss! Tha-that stings!
”
Gretchen: “Sit still just a bit more, now lemme git a big bandage on that.”

Hm, can’t exactly wrap gauze around that. Less I wanna end up muzzling her with’em. Guess sticking a few small ones will have to do. Then I get her arm wrapped up and take care of her bite marks as well.

Gretchen: “They sure did a number on you. Poor thing.”

Patient: “I-i-don’t remind me.”

Gretchen: “Oh, sorry. Well...here come on now, let’s get you warmed up by the fire."

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:52 No. 1093618 ID: 15a025
File 171977714972.png - (235.09KB , 500x500 , 33.png )

I get the fireplace and stove going and wrap her up in a bundle of blankets.

>Get some warm but not scalding mild herbal tea with honey in it for her.
Gretchen: “Do you like tea?”

Patient: “I-uh…sure!”

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:52 No. 1093619 ID: 15a025
File 171977717464.png - (323.01KB , 500x500 , 34.png )

I get a kettle on the stove and start boiling some water. It’ll take a bit before the water’s ready. Is there anything I should talk to her or George about? Maybe I should get something else on the stove too…

> with a alcohol soaked cotton ball.

Better hope George doesn't find out!

No really, isowhatever alcohol is fine too, if whiskey isn't an option.

Can't hurt to put on a pot of soup.

>>1093630
Yeah soup. Its a long night ahead

>>1093619
Thin soup.

While it simmers check all your doors are locked.
Then sit and while she eats ask her name.
Where shes from.
Smallest of small talk.
If you see george tell him to keep that gun close even when the game is back on.
The things out there are dangerous.

Is it physically possible to get George to acknowledge the seriosity of this here situation? As insufferable as he’s being right now, I’m guessing we *don’t* want him dead. Show him the girl, emphasize what state she was in when you FOUND her. Shit is getting real, and if he doesn’t get his shit together, his shit will get eaten alive by whatever the hell is out there.

You should ask for her name. Kinda rude to just keep calling her patient.

...George already got eaten alive, didn't he.

My one recommendation is to make sure that wherever you're hunkered down, George is between you and the doors. Let any interlopers run into him first, and with any luck, the business end of his shotgun will take care of them.

Let's go talk to George and say something short but impationated, like "George, what's happened to us lately? We barely care about each other anymore. You were even willing to let our house be broken into if it let you have a few more minutes of game Time! What made you lose interest in everything else? Was it me? If we live through this, I want you to know that I miss you, I miss what we had, and I wish we can have it again." *handsqueeze*

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:47 No. 1093890 ID: 15a025
File 172032763027.png - (347.42KB , 500x500 , 35.png )

>Can't hurt to put on a pot of soup.
>Yeah soup. It’s a long night ahead
>Thin soup.
My stomach starts to rumble, reminding me of why I went out in the first place. Maybe if George behaves and stays on watch, he can have some too. It’ll have to be carrot stew though, about all we have left.

>Is it physically possible to get George to acknowledge the seriosity of this here situation? As insufferable as he’s being right now, I’m guessing we *don’t* want him dead.

As much as I’d love to bash his head in, especially today, I’d be devastated and lonely without him. As for taking it seriously, well… he’ll probably shoot anything or anyone that interrupts the game that isn’t me.

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:47 No. 1093891 ID: 15a025
File 172032766483.png - (323.84KB , 500x500 , 36.png )

>Then sit and while she eats, ask her name. Where shes from. Smallest of small talk.
It’s going to be a bit before that stew’s finished. I sit down for a moment and chit-chat with our guest.

Patrick Stagg: “And we’re back! This is Patrick Stagg bringing you here for the final quarter!”

Of course you are, and here comes George stampeding back to his chair, gun in tow.
Gretchen: “George be careful! You’re gonna end up-“

George: “Zip it, games back on.”

Gretchen: “George you need to keep watch-“

George: “And who is this disgusting, sickly looking creature you’ve dragged into the house anyway?!”

George: “Come on now, your nose is running like a faucet! Wife gave you a box of tissues, use the damn things!”

She looks over and blows through a few tissues.

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:48 No. 1093892 ID: 15a025
File 172032768670.png - (7.94KB , 800x800 , 37.png )

Patient: “S-sorry. Uh… My name’s Gretta. Gretta Grismiller.”

George: “GRISMILLER? You? You’re a Grismiller?!”

Gretchen: “Who? George we don’t know any-”

George: “Gregg Gristmiller! You know, only the owner of the biggest lumber yard and hardware store in the state Gretchen!”

Gretta: “Oh! Y-you know my father?”

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:54 No. 1093893 ID: 15a025
File 172032806269.png - (7.75KB , 800x800 , 38.png )

George: “Well, not personally. I just shop at one of his stores is all.”

Gretta: “O…oh.”

Gretchen: “Something wrong deery?”

George: “Yeah! Quit yer yappin so I can hear what’s going on!”

Gretchen: “I wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to Gretta.”

He turns the volume up on tv again.

Gretta: “I-it’s nothing.”

George: “Don’t you have dinner or something cookin? That skinny th- I mean... your guest is probably starving!”

...Is your husband a hardcore religious zealot?
Ask Gretchen if she's on... good terms with her dad. Because the serials who captured her would be pretty stupid to intentionally mess with the richest asshole in the state.

>>1093893
ETA on the soup?

This George is a real piece of work, Gretchen, and if he's the only thing between you and a devastating loneliness, then I hope you've been considering expanding your support network.

But more immediately, you have a lumber magnate's daughter in your house, and she may be hotly pursued by maniacs who are willing to kill. Does her dad's company log these woods? Is that why she was kidnapped, to be a bargaining chip with her father's company? How was she kidnapped,anyway? It might be a good thing to ask about.

>>1093893
She sounded worried he knew her father...
Run away taken advantage of maybe...
Poor greta.

Soup for her.
Maybe an extra blanket over the shoulders.

Let her rest a little and eat before figuring out what to do next.

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/07/17(Wed)19:32 No. 1094393 ID: 15a025
File 172126996720.png - (214.25KB , 500x500 , 39.png )

>Does her dad's company log these woods?
Gretchen: “Does your dad or his company log in these woods?”

Gretta: “Hm…no I don’t think he does. Maybe not yet anyway.”

George: “Ain’t no way I’d be selling our trees to some flapjack munchin wood jockeys. Not even to another man I respect."

Gretchen: “No one asked you George, go back to your football game.”

>How was she kidnapped,anyway? It might be a good thing to ask about.
Gretchen: “Gretta. I know it’s a hard question to ask, but how did you get kidnapped in the first place?”

Gretta: “Well, I was back on campus heading to my night class, when something went over my head! I freaked out and fell over. Things were pretty hazy after that. Last thing I remember was waking up in that basement.”

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/07/17(Wed)19:36 No. 1094394 ID: 15a025
File 172127018538.png - (335.79KB , 500x500 , 40.png )

TV: “OH! INTERCEPTION, and just before the ten yard line!”

George: “WHAT A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT! Come on get your act together!”

Gretchen: “George! Don’t interrupt our guests. We’re still up a few points anyway…”

George: “Wait, what was that?”

Gretchen: “Nothing dear.”

George: "No not you! Ah never mind. Must be windy outside, receptions getting a little fuzzy."

>ETA on the soup?

Maybe some warm food will help everyone here. Wait, soup? Oh no! I started making a stew not soup. Ah well, not like George’ll know either way.

The tea kettle starts whistling, so I take care of that first. I carefully pour a cup for Gretta and dip a tea bag in. I check my carrots for the stew but they don’t seem ready yet-

*THUMP*

I freeze in place. A single knock?

*THUMP*

*THUMP*

No, it almost sounds like it’s coming from abo-

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/07/17(Wed)19:37 No. 1094395 ID: 15a025
File 172127023849.png - (44.35KB , 500x500 , 41.png )

George: “ARE YOU KIDDING ME! RIGHT IN THE FINAL QUARTER OF THE GAME!”

Gretchen: “George be quiet! There’s some weird noises on the roof!”

George: “TV SIGNAL IS CUTTING OUT RIGHT AS IT HITS THE LAST FIVE MINUTES!”

"It's probably the insane wannabe-vampire violently homicidal criminals destroying the antenna or something. Why they care about the TV antenna... well, I did say 'insane', didn't I?"

"Great, the 'doctor' cut our fuse box. George, please murder whoever did this with your shotgun."

They stole your wood and now they're after your antenna! George's turn to deal with these hooligans.

>>1094395
Oh.
NOW hes motivated...

Reassure your guest. She's going to be worried.

Then you can tell your hubby that first they came for the wood, now they want his gametime.
It sounded like one was on the roof, so warn him.
If he does go storming out there he may get ambushed so watch his back from the door. If he forgets the shotgun, you remember it.

Oh no! Its a trap to get George outside and leave you and Gretta defenseless. Fire shots at the roof to scare them.

Santa?!

>>1094434
That big jolly bastard probably likes curling. Damn him and his deer enslaving ways.

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:58 No. 1094597 ID: 15a025
File 172160988414.png - (16.84KB , 500x500 , 42.png )

>Reassure your guest. She's going to be worried.
I ignore George for now and bring Gretta her tea.

>They stole your wood and now they're after your antenna! George's turn to deal with these hooligans.
>you can tell your hubby that first they came for the wood, now they want his gametime.
Gretchen: “Have some tea and warm up a little bit. George’ll go outside and get the antenna fixed. Won’t you George?

He grumbles and fumbles with his gun out.

Gretchen: “First it was our wood, and now it’s the antenna. When are you going to do something about this George!”

George: “Now listen here woman! If there’s anyone up on that roof messing with my antenna, I’m blastin them off to Hell! I also want a play-by-play report of what I missed.”

Gretchen: “George, I’ll write verbatim what the announcers and coaches say. JUST TAKE CARE OF THE DAMN CRIMINALS ON OUR ROOF!”

He gives me a pen and pad.

George: “About time you offer to do something useful.” He then stomps out the front door, gun in tow.

Gretchen: [smal]”Alright, no dinner for George it is then.”[/small]

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:58 No. 1094598 ID: 15a025
File 172160990882.png - (180.71KB , 500x500 , 43.png )

I go back to my stew, trying to ignore the loud footsteps on the roof.

George: ”YOU LITTLE SCUM BAG! YOU DON’T GET BETWEEN A MAN AND HIS HOMETEAM ON GAMENIGHT!”

A gunshot booms from the roof. Hopefully that’s the last of-

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:59 No. 1094599 ID: 15a025
File 172160994270.png - (7.18KB , 800x800 , 44.png )

The front door slams open, a very muscular bear with a mask is standing on my porch.

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:59 No. 1094600 ID: 15a025
File 172160995530.png - (34.28KB , 1000x1000 , 45.png )

He has my ax.

Step 1: Ask him to put the ax down.
Step 2: Flash your tits.
Step 3: Bolt for Gretchen.
Step 4: Escape out the window.

That stew is scalding hot. You can probably just throw the stew at him, drench him in it

Did the other masked dude even react to injury? Burns might not work. You probably have other items you could use here, like throwing pots and pans at him.
The axe is a problem though; if he swings that at you, you need to either not get hit, or put something sturdy between you and him.

You should call for help from George, and look around for something to trip the masked man up, like some oil or something else he'd trip on like a bunch of marbles.

>>1094603
stew blinding is a good plan, but you'll need to wait till he approaches close enough.

>>1094603
This
.
Back away.
Let him get close,
then its dinner time!
And while hes reeling, beat him around the head with any pan you have.
Just imagine hes george in those angry fantasies you sometimes have thatd youd never really do.

He has your axe!

Hold a pan for defense, as it will probably make for a better shield than nothing, even if it is an axe.

Picture these weirdos as the football players and that awful, awful Patrick Stagg from that stinkin' ESDN that keeps your husband hooked to the boob tube.

Then grab the boiling pot.

He has your axe? Your axe, that you gave to Gretchen? How did he get it, where did she put it?

If he's that prime a specimen, you'll have to fight smarter, not harder. Scalding him might give you a second, but it won't stop him, especially if these maskers can shrug off things that would make most people recoil. You're burning the wood you recovered in that stove, right? Would it be worth it to try setting the intruder on fire?

>>1094708
And risk getting the house on fire? Not smart. Scalding him with the stew is a good way to get him to stop for a moment. After that, I don't know, shove a poker in his neck? The biggest knife we can find? Even if he's tough as shit, boiling stew is boiling stew.

1/5 Buckwheat 2024/07/31(Wed)18:21 No. 1095066 ID: 15a025
File 172247529392.png - (7.65KB , 800x800 , 46.png )

>He has your axe? Your axe, that you gave to [Gretta]? How did he get it, where did she put it?

I needed it to chop wood for the stove! Must have left it outside when I was done.

>Hold a pan for defense, as it will probably make for a better shield than nothing, even if it is an axe.

I start slowly backing up to the stove. Pan…pan…where’s the pan!

The crazed bear roars and starts charging at me!

2/5 Buckwheat 2024/07/31(Wed)18:21 No. 1095067 ID: 15a025
File 172247531572.png - (5.59KB , 800x400 , 47.png )

>That stew is scalding hot. You can probably just throw the stew at him, drench him in it
>stew blinding is a good plan, but you'll need to wait till he approaches close enough.

I grab the pot of hot stew and toss the whole thing at him!

There’s a grizzly snarl of pain, but he’s still holding onto the ax.

3/5 Buckwheat 2024/07/31(Wed)18:22 No. 1095068 ID: 15a025
File 172247534099.png - (252.83KB , 500x500 , 48.png )

>Bolt for Gretta.
>Escape out of the window.

Crawling up and out the window is too slow and awkward. There’s the back door though!

I dash to the living room, grab Gretta by the arm, and exit out the back.

4/5 Buckwheat 2024/07/31(Wed)18:23 No. 1095069 ID: 15a025
File 172247543288.png - (133.77KB , 500x500 , 49.png )

Gretchen: “George! George get down here we need to leave!”

George: “Damn straight we do! Some delinquent drug addict busted my antenna! Get in the truck, I’ll be right down.”

Gretchen: “Well hurry there’s-“

George: “Yeah I know! There’s not enough time to drive into town to catch the end of the game.”

HE'S STILL WORRIED ABOUT THAT F- You know what, as long as it gets him to drive us into town I won’t argue. I don't care.

5/5 Buckwheat 2024/07/31(Wed)18:27 No. 1095070 ID: 15a025
File 172247566601.png - (344.06KB , 500x500 , 50.png )

We make a run for the truck.
Gretchen: “You’ll have to sit in the middle Gretta, It’s a bit too tight of a squeeze for me to sit next to George.”

We buckle in and hear another gun shot echo in the distance.

Gretchen: “George?!”

George: “I’M COMING!”

a few moments later he gets in and starts the truck.

George: “What, are all the thieves coming out of the wood works today or something? First they steal my wood, then they try to steal the antenna, and then some bear is helping himself to our dinner. Shot him too by the way. Oh, and you forgot to put out the stove. Took care of that for ya too.”

Gretchen: “For the love- step on it George!”

George: “Yeah yeah, I’m going. Get the radio on, maybe I can at least listen to what happens.”

Gretta: “So…where are we go-“

George: “Quite!”

Radio: “-Slight delay in the game. Gerald D. Antler’s antlers punctured the last football on field. The team’s are currently waiting for the replacement ball to be delivered.”

George: “Oh yes! YES! We just might make it in town to catch the end after all.”

Gretchen: “George, don’t you think-“

George: “Oh right, it’s your turn to pick the bar or restaurant we go to. They gotta have a tv though!”

Oh for the love of- well, maybe at least we can get a meal or something out of this. It'll be nice to have someone else do the cooking for once. What kind of bar or restaurant should we go to?

How about that castle themed sports bar in the strip mall? The one with those ridiculous crenelations on top. And it's right next to the gun store too.

How about that one bar your friend Virgil works at? They sometimes has a band playing music over there, hopefully they'll have people playing after the game ends. Plus you havent seen virgil in awhile. Does he still work there?

Okay seriously I think your husband has brain damage
Maybe you can live at The Gretchens' for a while.

>Diner
The It's Al(an)-Wake Eggs
24-hour small cafe; egg breakfasts and breakfast burritos are always available, or you get a coupon for ice cream.

Is George always ignorantly unaware of things like this, or is he just that obsessed?

Does George maybe have some kind of mental or behavioral or neurological condition? ... Or with your luck, he does, but it's one doctors won't have a name for, for decades, probably?

>>1095070
Hes so invested in this game.

Say.

George hasnt got a bet riding on this, has he?

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/08/10(Sat)23:11 No. 1095686 ID: 15a025
File 172335666412.png - (351.09KB , 500x500 , 51.png )

>Does George maybe have some kind of mental or behavioral or neurological condition?
No, normally he’s just a wonderful hard working husband. You’d never know that though if you sat with him for Sunday night football.

>How about that castle themed sports bar in the strip mall?
Gretchen: “How about we go to that castle themed sports bar at the strip mall? You know, the one with the really good crouton salads.”

My stomach is growling just thinking about it.

George: “Hey! For once I can agree. Mead there is pretty good.”

Gretta: “A-aren’t you the driver though?”

Gretchen: “Yeah George, or are you actually going to let me drive the truck for once.”

George: “Ah that’s what taxis are for!”

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/08/10(Sat)23:12 No. 1095687 ID: 15a025
File 172335672913.png - (252.31KB , 500x500 , 52.png )

After narrowly escaping a speeding ticket, we arrive at the mall and head to Shattered Helmet Keep. Despite the old nerdy castle theme, they have a few tvs up on the wall with various sports channels playing. George’s attention snaps over to the one airing the home game.”

>Hes so invested in this game. Say. George hasnt got a bet riding on this, has he?
Gretchen: “Say George. You’re a little more invested in this football game than normal. Perhaps….financially invested?”

George: “What, like stocks in the team? I ain’t no wolf a wall street.”

My tone takes a stern shift.
Gretchen: “George, how much money is riding on this game?”

George: “I ain’t bet nothing.”

Gretchen: “Don’t lie to me George. How much did you bet?”

George: ”termemrhm- hundred.”

Gretchen: “Quit mumbling and spit it out!”

George: “THREE HUNDERED!”

Gretchen: “W- what. What were you thinking! That’s two house payments! H- how-could-you- I.”

George: “Now you’re the one mumbling.”

Gretchen: “George, we can’t recover from a loss like that! If you lose this bet, we’re going to lose our house!”

George: “Now you listen here! This is the home team playing on the home field against the second worst team of the season. It’s is the most guaranteed bet anyone could have ever made in their life.”

I cannot believe what I am hearing right now.

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/08/10(Sat)23:13 No. 1095688 ID: 15a025
File 172335683572.png - (377.46KB , 500x500 , 53.png )

A server walks over and interrupts us.

Gallop: “Uh, hi I’m Gallop, I’ll be your server today. Is there anything I-“

Gretchen: “Nows really not a good time ma’am.“

Gallop: “Ah-that’s okay. I’ll check back in a few minutes then.”

Yes, and in a few minutes I’ll be finding out if we’re going to be homeless. What can I even say or do at this point? What if he is right though and the team does win?

I don’t know what to do.

tell your husband if his team loses, you're divorcing and moving back to mother's. you're tired of his shit.

this because he has to know how much of a stupid decision he is doing, and has to know for sure what he is losing so he doesn't pull this again.

Oh dear, for lots of reasons. Gambling, for one. But…

Second worst? He didn’t bet on the first worst, did he?

Also, he tried to lie to you. That’s the absolute most horrible part.

If it's that much of a sure bet then the odds must be terrible. Just how much would he make if he wins?

>>1095687
If he loses, you're getting a divorce and moving into Gretchen pad as her maid.

Nononono you're not angry! You're the angry deer wife! how could this happen this is a disaster!

>>1095688
Im sorry to be right.

It does explain a lot though.
Not the forest crazies but the, uh, im mentally gesturing in the vague direction of george.

Eat a salad.
You need energy whatever happens and you could check on greta.

Try not to get invested in the game.
He'll interpret it as support.
Distract yourself with gretta.
Win or lose, you have every reason to be angry about this but however it plays out, knowing the stakes, george and you wont be able to navigate those rapids just yet.
So, talk to gretta.
Ask if she wants to go home or does she have reasons to stay away.
Youre not going to make her do something she doesnt want to but youre not going to stop helping her now of all tines.

Thrte is a little self preservation here though.
Losing yourself in someone elses problems can help distract you from your own.
Not healthy to do long term but in this moment it might just stop you seeing if any of the decorative weapons in this medieval funpub are functional enough to geld a reckless husband.

>>1095688
That's a pretty shitty thing to do, innit? I'm not so sure about divorce, since that usually just ends...like a whole other mess. But uh, pretty bad, no?

>>1095692
>>1095696
Maybe not full on divorce if he's normally a good enough husband, but definitely stay at mothers (without him) until he gets the house back if he loses and we end up homeless.

I guess it's a weird comparison, but you know that one guy from Season 2 of Kaiji? He gambled away his house, so his wife and daughter basically just fucked off until he got it back and they resumed being a family.

>>1095703
yeah, good point. But yeah, you're still staying at mothers until he fixes things himself. Be prepared to have mother say things like "I told you so"

>>1095703

Separate bank accounts would be an idea. That and having only her name on the deed of whatever housing they can get. If he's got a gambling problem, setting boundaries is important, but it doesn't mean you have to leave him.

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/08/11(Sun)19:25 No. 1095713 ID: 15a025
File 172342950855.png - (306.00KB , 500x500 , 54.png )

>Second worst? He didn’t bet on the first worst, did he?
I don’t even want to know.

>tell your husband if his team loses, you're divorcing
>If he loses, you're getting a divorce
Gretchen: “George I hope you realize the stakes in this game are about to get a lot higher.”

George: “Seeing the easy chance to make some cash yourself too eh?”

I take off my earrings.

George: “What are you doing with your wedding rings?”

Gretchen: “Now our marriage is on the line. If your team loses this game, I’m leaving. We’re getting divorced and I’ll- I don’t even know where I’ll go. I hope it was worth it George. Come on Gretta, lets go sit elsewhere and get something to eat.”

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/08/11(Sun)19:26 No. 1095714 ID: 15a025
File 172342959110.png - (336.11KB , 500x500 , 55.png )

We find a booth and Gretta waves the server over.

Gallop: “Oh hello again! All set to order now?”

Gretchen: “Yeah, can I have one of those crouton salads and some of those little ranch dressing packets to go with it?”

Gallop: “Sure, and what about you Gre-uh…“

She worriedly looks at Gretta. She seems a bit distracted at first, but quickly shoves a menu at Gretta.

Gallop: “Uh, H-here, why don’t you take a look at our specials today?”

There’s an awkward moment of silence while she looks over the menu. The server has an obviously concerned look. What, is this her first day on the job or something? Wonder why only she was offered a menu.

Gretta: “Oh- no. Thank you miss, but she’s with me. You can just put our orders on my father’s tab.”

She’s looks over at George for a moment.

Gretchen: “That guy is paying for himself though. He can lick his own salt.”

Gallop: “Very well then. What can I get you?”

Gretta: “Whatever you can get out here the fastest please.”

Gallop: “Be back in just a moment then!”

True to her name, she gallops off into the kitchen with our order.

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/08/11(Sun)19:27 No. 1095715 ID: 15a025
File 172342965788.png - (158.89KB , 500x500 , 56.png )

Gretchen: “What was that all about?”

Gretta: “Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

Gretchen: “Is your father really okay with putting our dinner on his tab?”

She lets out a little laugh.

Gretta: “I dunno now, that bowl of salad just might bankrupt the company. Might have to lay off a few employees to hide those losses.”

Gretchen: “Hey, last thing I need is to invoke is the wrath of an angry father tonight.”

Gretta: “Think of it as a treat for saving me today then.”

>Ask if she wants to go home or does she have reasons to stay away.
Gretchen: “Are you gonna be alright though Gretta? Do you want to go home after this, or…are you on good terms with your father?”

Gretta: “Sort of, I’d rather not talk about it though. I would like to get home and see him when I can, probably worried about me.”

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/08/11(Sun)19:28 No. 1095716 ID: 15a025
File 172342972488.png - (329.94KB , 500x500 , 57.png )

Gretta: “Are…are you really going to get a divorce if he loses that bet?”

I let out a sigh.

>Maybe not full on divorce if he's normally a good enough husband,
>Separate bank accounts would be an idea. That and having only her name on the deed of whatever housing they can get. If he's got a gambling problem, setting boundaries is important, but it doesn't mean you have to leave him.
Gretchen: “Okay, maybe I’d consider giving him a second chance to fix things. Setting some stronger boundaries, So help me, marriage counseling if it comes to it. He’s done a few stupid things in the past, but this really is the cherry on top. If he loses, we’re probably going to lose our home!”

Gretta: “Well, I can’t exactly speak for my father on this one. He might be able to help you out if your husband loses his bet.”

Gretchen: “How so?”

Gretta: “There were lots of trees out on your property. Sell a chunk of them and I can put in a good word for you.”

Gretchen: “Gretta, that’s a tough call to make.”

What George did was awful, but could I really go behind his back and do something like this?

>>1095716
Maybe wait for the game to end to decide such a thing? Even if we agreed, we'd need to make a contract later.

The way i see it, wait for the game to end. If we win, then there's no need. If we lose, and George finally realizes the pit he's dug himself, we make it clear that the only way he's not getting promoted to bachelor is if he
- Agrees to some SERIOUS changes to his behaviour
- Agrees to the deal

The former is gonna happen even if he wins, of course, but if worst comes to pass, then let him know that if he doesn't fall in line, he's going to be jealous of the freaks he shot in the face.

Why would it be behind his back? Win or lose he's got a lot to make up for. If its sell the trees or lose the house he's not really in a position to object.

>>1095716
By the time youve finjshed eating youll know whether you need to or not.
Whatever the result let george stew a little while before throwing him a lifeline lime this.

Overboard? Maybe, considering we had to deal with a bunch of violent people today which added to our frustration, but something needs to be done about George after putting up with his antics for so long, and this is what came to mind out of the accumulated frustration.

>>1095716
Not behind his back. If he loses the bet then you can tell him about the proposed deal, then if he agrees you go along with the deal, taking out a loan to cover immediate expenses if the money doesn't come immediately.

Why would you need his permission? You didn't give yours for the bet.

why is EVERYONE after your WOOD

We won't need to do anything behind his back.

We need a house to live, and he certainly needs a house to watch the games. If he loses, we will be selling. Either wood or the land it grows from, but we cannot afford to let his pride run us out of house and home.


Now go up there with him and his beer belly for good luck! (And hoots and giggles)

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/08/18(Sun)19:27 No. 1096040 ID: 15a025
File 172403447225.png - (214.55KB , 500x500 , 58.png )

>why is EVERYONE after your WOOD
It’s a cold, cold winter. Wood’s a hot commodity around this time of year.

>Maybe wait for the game to end to decide such a thing? Even if we agreed, we'd need to make a contract later.
>By the time youve finjshed eating youll know whether you need to or not.
>Whatever the result let george stew a little while before throwing him a lifeline
Gretchen: “I’ll wait and see how the game ends first. If he wins, we won’t have to sell.”

The server comes back with water and a bowl of berries, nuts, and corn,

Gallop: “Here’s a little appetizer for you two. It’ll be about five minutes for the salads.”

Gretta is already shoveling mouthfuls of food. She tries to talk but I can’t understand a word she says. In mere moments the bowl is empty and mess of food is scattered about the table.

Gretchen: “I think you got more on the table than in your mouth somehow.”

Gretta: “Oh, sorry. I- I couldn’t help myself. At the uh, “doctors” all I got was a stale tasting food bars. It felt like forever between them too.”

Poor thing, sounds like they were starving her.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/08/18(Sun)19:28 No. 1096041 ID: 15a025
File 172403449140.png - (150.26KB , 500x500 , 59.png )

She gets a worried look on her face.

Gretta: “What if they followed us back to town though Gretchen? T-they came back to your house for me. What if they try to take me again?”

Well there's more people here that can help, and you can call the police while doing your best to delay them so that the police can handle it. Shooting dangerous-looking things is one thing we can count on police to do.

They wouldnt dare come and pull something here in public. Also, We could probably get the police involved. Worse comes to worst, she may have to go into a witness protection program. Gonna be a pain yes, but better than having stalkers trying to kidnap her again

They followed a wheelbarrow trail through the snow, following a car on roads will be much harder.
And if worst comes at least we are somewhere with food, fuel, and a castle themed roof you hold up in.

>>1096041
Well...I probably wouldn't stay alone for a while, but I imagine that with three witnesses, we can probably contact the police.

Let's just hope this isn't one of those horror movies where the police is also in on it.

"Your dad has mercenary guards, right? If we can get to them, we'll survive."

>>1096041
Point out the solid doors, staff, any other customers.
Remind her youre at a central, public location.

Its understandable to be wary.
Afraid even.
Her mind is probably only just starting to catch up with her body thats been running on instinct and short term survival thinking for too long.
Situations like the one she was in dont leave much room for anything else.
Now shes got enough quiet to afford some mental energy to worry.
So, reassure he.
Shes been through a lot and it will catch up with her a bit at a time, but youre out of the woods now.
Literally and figuratively.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/08/26(Mon)17:41 No. 1096530 ID: 15a025
File 172471928076.png - (246.02KB , 500x500 , 60.png )

>They followed a wheelbarrow trail through the snow, following a car on roads will be much harder.
Gretchen: “Wheelbarrow tracks in the snow are a lot easier than trying to follow a car. Not to mention, we’re in a ‘castle’ with lots of food and eyes around. No one is busting in to take you away here.”

Gretta: “Well… what about after we leave? What if they’ve got someone waiting for us in the parking lot?”

> you can call the police while doing your best to delay them
> I imagine that with three witnesses, we can probably contact the police.
Gretchen: “We should probably call the police and report what happened. Come on Gretta, lets get to the payphone.”

I dig a dime out of my purse and make a call. I explain the situation to the operator; they assure us an escort and lookouts will be dispatched.

Gretchen: “Right, okay then. We'll watch for them to come in then, thank you.”

As I hang up the phone, I hear an cacophony of cheering, chanting, and booing at the bar. Guess it’s time to face the music.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/08/26(Mon)17:46 No. 1096531 ID: 15a025
File 172471960549.png - (318.09KB , 500x500 , 61.png )

I squeeze my way around the crowd and sit next to George at the bar. He’s sure cheering up a storm.

George: “YES! YES!!! WE WON! WE WOON! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!"

Gretchen: “I take it someone's happy now?”

George: “You bet! Ah, the ol home team always puts on a good- oh, it’s you.”

Gretchen: “What do you mean ‘Oh it’s you’?”

George: “So you’ve come crawling back for me now that I just won my big bet. I see how it is.”

I grab my wedding earrings from him and put them back on. Part of me has hard time looking him in the face still, but I still end up shooting a dirty look his way.

I don't even know what to say or tell him.

>>1096531
Tell him you meant what you said. You're not going to leave him but that doesn't mean you're happy about what he did. He cannot do it again, and whatever winnings he made were not worth the risk of losing everything.

Why the HELL did you forget the five golden rules of gambling?!

-Don’t forget that if you play, you can also lose.
-Don’t spend more money than you can afford
-Set yourself a budget and don’t exceed it.
-Never borrow money to be able to gamble.
-Do not gamble to win back money you have already lost by gambling.

>>1096531
"Next time you think about betting on a game without telling me then atleast don't bet enough to screw us both over"

>>1096531
Tell him to look you in the eye and stop being an idiot for a singular second and really, really think about these events. I mean *really* think about how he's treated us.

Is he drunk?

>>1096531
There is something seriously wrong with your husband's mind.
Stay with Gretchen for now. When the time comes, have him knocked out and use Gretchen's money to scan an MRI of his brain.
I suspect these woods are cursed - with lead and mercury.

A bet's a bet. You said you wouldn't leave him if they won, and they won. You and him are going to have a talk about betting other people's lives away, but you two need each other together more than ever now, with all those masked lunatics on the loose.

Since he bet the house, he better be getting two houses out of this, in his winnings.

Buckwheat 2024/08/27(Tue)19:26 No. 1096586 ID: 15a025
File 172481201720.png - (235.27KB , 500x500 , 62.png )

>A bet's a bet. You said you wouldn't leave him if they won, and they won.
>Tell him you meant what you said. You're not going to leave him but that doesn't mean you're happy about what he did.
Gretchen: “I meant what I said earlier with that beat. Don’t think I’m going to be happy about what you pulled though George!”

George: “What part of sure fire bet do you not get? The home team creamed those losers!”

Gretchen: “What if their quarterback got injured? What if the fastest runner on the team broke their leg? Literally anything could have happened.”

>Tell him to look you in the eye and stop being an idiot for a singular second
I give him the most wretched Gretchen look I can possibly muster up.
Gretchen: “I want you to stop and think, and I mean THINK, for a moment. Do you even realize how you’ve been treating me tonight?”

He slams his fist on the table,
George: “How about you shush woman! I’d say shooting off two robbers in our house and taking you out to the bar is quite the treat.”

I can’t tell if he’s trying to dance around his gambling issue here or what. I hate to say he isn’t making a bad point, but that doesn’t excuse risking our livelihood and home on a football game of all things, or disrespecting me like that! Treating me like I’m just being an annoyance to him instead of taking this more seriously. It’s just making my blood boil but maybe this isn’t a good time or place for an intervention. Maybe I shouldn't even bother pressing it further for now.

Great, now I'm tearing myself up about it. What should I do? Is it better to keep pressing him or should I walk away from it for now and try to find out what happened to my order?

>>1096586
If you let up on it, he won't learn...this is serious here. Maybe see if he's not just being awkward in public, but if you're in private enough, just...try to really get through to him? I wouldn't know your full history, but really try to make him understand how many years of marriage he almost ruined. For serious. And i don't just mean "be angry". I mean summon every ounce of depth and history.

Unless he's drunk. If he's drunk, there's no use.

There's no use talking if he's not in a headspace to listen. More immediate concerns, like weather a cult is targeting you, or where your salad is.

But you should be planning what you can do to support yourself, because this relationship is not looking healthy.

Time to put this anger to good use. Let it flow through you.

Does he worship his friends?
I'm worried he might worship his friends and treat their 'advice' as gospel.
In the late stages, God is his friend. Who he worships.

>>1096586
Are you really sure hes a good guy underneath or is that something you started telling yourself more and more as the years went on?
What was the last thing he did that reminded you that you love him?
Maybe...
Maybe its just been a crazy night.
Maybe hes a good guy like you say but youll need a drilling team to dig deep enough through the compacted asshole layer and fossilised totalfuckingdickheadium to reach the good right now.

Give yourself space from him and any sharp objects that might just end up planted in his forehead.

There are thousand, dare I say a million better ways to adress the issue, and we likely should do it at a much less pressing time, especially with the police on the way.

But publicly emasculating your big meanie husband might still teach him a lasting lesson is way funnier.
KICK HIM IN THE UNDERBELLY!

You have a counterpoint about saving his wood. Without you, you'd be going back to a cold house with no way to stay warm. Actually, will you be returning to a warm house? Having run off to town, there's nothing stopping the harvesters from harvesting your wood again.

But you can totally make a loud, emasculating joke about this. "Yeah? Well, if I hadn't spent all that time looking for it, I wouldn't think you had any wood at all!"

This isn't about me George. You have a problem. I need you to help me fix it, so we can get past this and maybe survive the night. Just think about it! We can talk later.

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/10/30(Wed)19:23 No. 1099223 ID: b6ea64
File 173034143164.png - (453.09KB , 500x500 , 63.png )

>What was the last thing he did that reminded you that you love him?
Well, he bought me the very ax I use to chop wood for my birthday. He’s a very thoughtful gift giver when he uses that thick skull of his. Wait, no that’s a bit materialistic…

Okay, I’m not sure it was the ‘last’ thing he’s done to stoke our feelings for each other; it certainly is a fond memory.

Last spring, George invited me out for a walk one night. It was dark and chilly, but he insisted. He led me all the way up this hill about a mile away from the house. When we reached the top he laid down onto his back and asked me to join him for some stargazing. It was stunning; the stars were so bright and beautiful. I wish I could describe it better but it felt like we were the only couple left on the whole planet. Just the two of us admiring the vast beauty of the outdoors.

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/10/30(Wed)19:24 No. 1099224 ID: b6ea64
File 173034145615.png - (7.03KB , 800x800 , 64.png )

Gallop: “Sorry for the wait, here’s your salad Gretta and…friend?”

Gretchen: “Oh thanks!”

I think to myself while I chew on my salad…

>Does he worship his friends?
No, at least not like he worships football.

>More immediate concerns, like weather a cult is targeting you.
That’s a concerning thought. Seems like they’re after Gretta, but now that I’ve interfered they might be coming for me too!

>Having run off to town, there's nothing stopping the harvesters from harvesting your wood again.
That’s the least of my concerns now! They know where I live, instead of wood, it’s me or George that could be harvested next! We might have to move into my mother or sister’s house after all.

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/10/30(Wed)19:25 No. 1099225 ID: b6ea64
File 173034150642.png - (263.69KB , 500x500 , 65.png )

I don’t have time to worry though, not even enough to finish my salad! A group of officers escort us to the parking lot. Gretta and I sit in the back of the cop car and George stays behind to wait for a cab.

At least he’s being responsible in some form tonight.

It’s a long drive and I lose track of time. I’m knocked out of my daze as a loud crash thunders through the night and the car comes to a screeching halt.

Gretchen: “Huh?! What’s going on???”

Gretta: “There’s a big tree in the road blocking the way!”

Gretchen: “What?! Ah shit!”

Nope nope nope get the fuck out of there this is an ambush for sure.

"This is an ambush. Back up and stop wayyyyy becore the tree, see if we can spot where it will come from "

>>1099228

Under no circumstances do we get close to that tree, that's the killzone for sure. Are there binoculars in here?

Well, let's make a U-turn and let's look for a different road. Do you know any that is more in the open and not through the woods?

>>1099223
A sweet moment.
Proof he still has a hart.
There's hope for the buck yet.

>>1099225
Oh hell.
Eyes on swivel deer.
If the officer tries to step out, tell him you can see things in the treeline, moving into position.
Whether you do or not.

Spare a glance for gretta.
Where is she looking?
How is she reacting?

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/11/01(Fri)19:00 No. 1099271 ID: b6ea64
File 173051282324.png - (7.53KB , 800x800 , 66.png )

>If the officer tries to step out, tell him you can see things in the treeline, moving into position.
Gretchen: “Don’t get out of the car!”

The front seats are empty.

Gretta: “Should have said that before they got out to move the tree.”

This isn’t good.
>Are there binoculars in here?
I can’t reach for the front to look. There’s a partition blocking our access.

>get the fuck out of there this is an ambush for sure.
>make a U-turn and let's look for a different road.
I reach for the door handle aaand of course there isn’t one. I slam my hoof against the window in frustration.
Gretchen: ”Fuck…

Gretta: “W-what’s wrong?”

Gretchen: “There’s no way to open the door, we’re stuck inside!”

I pound on the window and start shouting,
Gretchen: “Get back! Get back in the car and turn around! It’s an ambush!”
Gretchen: “Hey! AMBUSH! WATCH OUT!!”

Gretta: “G-gretchen!”

Gretchen: “Gretta, we’re getting out of this. Don’t worry. We’ll figure something out.”

Gretta: “Gretchen they’re gone! It’s gone!”

Gretchen: “What?”

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/11/01(Fri)19:00 No. 1099272 ID: b6ea64
File 173051285416.png - (158.15KB , 500x500 , 67.png )

We need to get to the front seat and pull out of here NOW.

>>1099272
Um... well, you can try kicking the window out?

>>1099274
Arent cop cars specifically designed against that?

Seems simple enough. Get in the front seat and pull out of here NOW.