WHY. NOT. ASK. THEN?
Doctor seems unprepared for a confrontation they should have been expecting, seeing as they stole a wheel barrow full of wood THROUGH THE SNOW

So these harvesters, they don't happen to wear masks do they? Like the one you're wearing?

"...Fine. Pay me for the wood. I'll order takeout."

>>1088432

Do they have cell service out here in the godforsaken snow-covered backcountry?

Medicine's fine anyway. But you're going to have a hard time surviving the winter without any wood. So he's curing one critter, by dooming two more. You can't just cut more wood either; that stuff needs to dry for a year at least.

He did take all the wood right?

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/16(Tue)17:47 No. 1088976 ID: 15a025
File 171331484566.png - (7.25KB , 800x800 , 19.png )

>Do they have cell service out here in the godforsaken snow-covered backcountry?
Cell service? Are you trying to say shell service? We have a shell station couple miles down the road. I mean, I guess if we got cold we could gas up and stay warm in George’s truck. Not gonna help warm up a stew for dinner though.

>could've just ASKED YOU.
>dont they teach you how to knock at plague medical school
>you clearly didn't think to ASK like a halfway decent being?!
>WHY. NOT. ASK. THEN?
Gretchen: “Then why didn’t you just knock on the door and ask!?”

Plague Doctor: “If you had several dangerous folk hunting you down, would you knock on a random stranger’s door for help?”

Gretchen: “I…”

It’s a shitty point, but I don’t think I can really argue against that.

Plague Doctor: “I only took a wheelbarrow full of wood to get through the night. If you need it back, then take it. If you want to be a stickler about the wood, I have a small bit of cash but you’re not getting it back. I saw how much you had stored.”

Gretchen: “MY SHED IS EMPTY!”

Plague Doctor: “Maybe you should invest in getting a lock for your shed then. I only took one load. Don’t have the time or safety to keep running back and forth hauling wood.”
Plague Doctor: “Every second I’m outside, every set of tracks I leave, is more time and clues they have to catch me.”

>Do harvesters like circus masks?
>So these harvesters, they don't happen to wear masks do they?
Gretchen: “Okay, what do these assholes even look like? Do they run around wearing creepy clown masks?”

Plague Doctor: “Well, they do conceal their faces. Clown mask? Why do you ask?”

Gretchen: “Some clown dog bozo attacked me with throwing knives on my way here.”

Plague Doctor: “I can’t say for certain, but consider yourself lucky to make it here.”

>Also you want to see the patient, so you know he's telling the truth.
>Lets see this patient.
Gretchen: “Alright, I want proof. Show me the patient, doc.”

Plague Doctor: “See to them yourself if you desire. I need to keep watch on my stems.”

Gretchen: “Where are they?”

Plague Doctor: “Just walk downstairs into the basement.”

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/04/16(Tue)17:50 No. 1088977 ID: 15a025
File 171331501416.png - (8.23KB , 800x800 , 20.png )

I grumble to myself and start stomping down the stairs. Not too bad, could make a decent storm shelter down here or something.

I find deer in rough shape sitting on a bed.

Patient: “I-who are you? ”

Gretchen: “Just an angry wife looking to get her fire wood back. I take it you're the patient?”

Patient: ”I- wait are you an actual doctor?”

Gretchen: “I-no? Do I look like a doctor?!”

Patient: ”Look, I don't know why she let you down here, but you need to get me out before we’re both trapped!”

they look to be in pretty rough shape to be running off anywhere. Ask them trapped by whom, the doctor or the harvesters?

>>1088977
Bite wounds. She's probably delirious from whatever it is. Go back upstairs immediately, ask what she's infected with.

I think it's worth asking for the patient's story now. The plague doctor is confident enough to give you free access to the patient, so let's make good on it, and confirm their stories jibe. The bite marks might suggest there's truth to the risk of predation tonight.

Bummer about that firewood, though. If we really want it back, then talking to these strangers is turning out to be a dead end. If there are theives still out there, they're getting away, and we should leave now to pursue a different set of tracks in the snow.

>>1088977
Theres a good chance you're about to hear a door close and lock behind you now gretchen, so you might as well ask for her story.
Lets hear from the deer.
Find out who the buck stops with.

Buckwheat 2024/04/28(Sun)14:14 No. 1089933 ID: 15a025
File 171433887469.png - (8.69KB , 800x800 , 21.png )

>She's probably delirious from whatever it is. Go back upstairs immediately, ask what she's infected with.
Gretchen: “I’m gonna go grab the doctor, you don’t look like you’re doing too well.”

Patient: “N-don’t! Please, get me out of here!”

>they look to be in pretty rough shape to be running off anywhere.
Gretchen: “You don’t like you’re in shape to be running anywhere. Look, the doctor upstairs is-“

Patient: She’s not a doctor! Not the kind that’d help anyways.”

>I think it's worth asking for the patient's story now.
>you might as well ask for her story.
Gretchen: “Alright then, what’s the story here? Door wasn’t locked or anything when I came down. If you wanted to leave, why haven’t you?”

Patient: “I-I’m too weak to run or resist; I’m starving and thirsty. She let’s those wolves in here and takes my blood! They bite me- and- and..."

They get down on their knees and start begging

Patient: “YOU GOTTA GET ME OUTTA HERE!”

>>1089933

So.... blood harvesters? Vampires? People who think they are vampires due to being insane?

The plague doctor guy warned against 'harvesters' though. He trying to play both sides or something?

Sneak back upstairs and knoc the doc out. Hold out here for the night.

No way is that story true. This patient is a recently-turned vampire and the doctor is trying to cure vampirism. If the patient's story was true the doctor would not have let you down here. Let's just go get the wheelbarrow and the rest of the wood.

She has bitemarks aplenty.
That could back up her story or indicate an attack and infection.

No one is being completely straight with you gretchin.
Thats gotta be making you angry.
Angrier.

Dont let her close to you.
Just incase.
Time to see doctor snootmask.
What theyre doing when you sneak back up should be interesting.

Ask what her "treatment" entails.

God dammit you didn't come here for all this shit. Where's you wheelbarrow and the rest of you wood!

Now if she's telling the truth then the only reason the doctor would let you down here is to trap you. So if you can just walk right back up then this lady is probably suffering paranoia or schizophrenia or something. Either way you're not a doctor, so nothing to be gained yammering down here.

At this point, if you stay here any longer, you're gonna need to be ready to stay here for the rest of the night, because your wood is getting away. You can go up before you get locked in here, too, and ask the "doctor" to comment on the patient's story, but you don't have to stay any longer than you feel like, if you can't get any more wood back here. I'm curious to know if the wolves the doctor lets in here wear masks, though; ask the patient about that before ditching to go back upstairs.

Whatever's wrong with them, they need a real doctor. Some quack in the woods isn't curing anything.

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/05(Sun)19:09 No. 1090402 ID: 15a025
File 171496136557.png - (194.05KB , 500x500 , 22.png )

>So.... blood harvesters? Vampires? People who think they are vampires due to being insane?
>No way is that story true. This patient is a recently-turned vampire and the doctor is trying to cure vampirism.

There’s no such thing as vampires. Though that doesn’t really stop others from believing in them I guess.

Gretchen: “This isn’t some kind of vampire bullshit going or-“

Patient: “No, vampires aren’t real. They’re not real, right?”

Gretchen: “No.”

>Time to see doctor snootmask.
>What theyre doing when you sneak back up should be interesting.
>you didn't come here for all this shit. Where's you wheelbarrow and the rest of you wood!

Gretchen: “I’m heading back upstairs and getting to the bottom of this. I ain’t leaving without my wood.”

Patient: “P-please! Take me with you!”

I march back upstairs.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/05(Sun)19:09 No. 1090403 ID: 15a025
File 171496138220.png - (8.59KB , 800x800 , 23.png )

Gretchen: “Alright doctor snootmask or whoever you are. What the hell is going on here. I come here for wood and my wheelbarrow, and you show me patient with bite marks saying your friends with some wolves and taking his blood.”

Doctor Snootmask: “And now you’re here to stay under my care!”

This crazy quack comes out of nowhere and tries to jab me with a damn needle! I jerk my arm out of the way just in time.

>>1090403
I mean. There's only one real reasonable response to someone trying that stuff with you isn't there?
SHUT THEM DOWN.

>>1090403
really

Ok, enact violence upon the crazy person. You got your axe? Use it. Try not to inflict an immediately fatal wound, you probably want to interrogate her a bit to see what she was trying to do.
First target is her arms/hands so she can't inject you.

slap him in the face and sternly say NO!

smack that syringe with the flat of the axe. It will drop or shatter, and then its time for a mask pull.

Oh no! He was a mime all along!

Another experience in favor of clocking anyone wearing a mask on sight. Defend yourself, and clobber this cook. Might as well let that "patient" free when you're done up here, but you can't stick around. You've got wood to find and burn.

>>1090403
Axe is too unweildy for close struggles.

Time for the old angry one-two gretchin!
Grab their snoot and yank it so the eyeholes arent aligned right then Kick for the crotch,

Then grab nearest object and chuck it right at them.

Then get the distance to decide your next move.

You are a svelt, agile deer and doctor snootmask has robes and a restricted field of vision.

Use mobility.

I think they must not have heard you the first time, you're not here to stay under their care, you're here for your wood and wheelbarrow.

Maybe make that clear to them with your axe. You feeling choppy or smashy?

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/12(Sun)18:21 No. 1090819 ID: 15a025
File 171556329486.png - (156.90KB , 500x500 , 24.png )

>Axe is too unwieldy for close struggles.
>Time for the old angry one-two gretchin! Grab their snoot and yank it so the eyeholes arent aligned right then Kick for the crotch.
Right, lifting that thing up is leaving me wide open for needle jabbin. I ain’t putting my arms out to get jabbed either.

>You are a svelt, agile deer and doctor snootmask has robes and a restricted field of vision. Use mobility.
>Try not to inflict an immediately fatal wound, you probably want to interrogate her a bit to see what she was trying to do.
>grab nearest object and chuck it right at them.

I quickly prance over to the stove and chuck the pot at them! It makes a very satisfying clunk when it hits. I can hear the needle shatter too.

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/05/12(Sun)18:22 No. 1090820 ID: 15a025
File 171556333921.png - (6.88KB , 800x800 , 25.png )

Gretchen: “What are you trying to pull here? What was in that needle, you mangy bag of robes?!”

Doctor Snootmask: “Heard your little conversation down there and had to act fast. Didn’t realize she was starting to come to already.”

Gretchen: “What was in the needle, and where’s my property?!”

Doctor Snootmask: “A little something to make you sleepy dear. You saw how my other patient is, she probably ain’t lastin much longer. Without her, I’ll have nothing left for the harvesters!”

Gretchen: “I- so you’re actually working for them? You know what, I don’t care. I just want my wood and wheelbarrow. Where’s it all at?”

Doctor Snootmask: “Out in my shed. Keep in mind, as night draws closer. So too will the harvesters.”

Not exactly dark out yet, still got an hour of light left maybe. Question is, am I just letting this quack off scotch free? Do I take their patient with me too?

Who cares about them. Just take the wheelbarrow amf wood. Then you can get back to dealing with your main problem: your husband

You just KNOW that you're going to encounter those 'I'm so crazy I think I'm a vampire and am also a dangerous, violent criminal who is in a gang of people just like me!' dumbfucks. Ugh. Might as well go get your property and return home, the sooner you can get you, your rightful property, and your dumb husband on one side of a bunch of locks and barricades, and leave all of this madness on the OTHER side, the better! Eyes and ears on a swivel, stay away from obvious ambush spots, move swiftly and with purpose, keep your weapon at hand.

>>1090820
The anger were feeling towards snootmask is justified.
Their victim isnt a patient.
Theyre being dispensed to the harvesters one bit at a time.

My initial instinct is to suggest that you:
Knock the doc out.
Tie them to a chair facing the door to the outside.
Rescue the victim.
Have them help start to recover the wood and cart.
Break the hinges of the front door with the axe sufficiently that the door hangs open.
Finish cart recovery and hustle back home.

Doc snootmask had someone trapped, without hope and knowing things were coming to feed on her.
Its only fair she experiences it too.

On a more practical side, when the harvesters turn up, theyll want their meal.
If left alone and secure doc will point them after you and ring the dinner bell.

Also, the patient will slow you down, and be a liability and someone you have to protect in your inevitable violent confrontation with this harvester gang. Besides, when you deal with them (because no one else around here seems competent, ugh), that removes the whole 'I must appease these criminals by doing crimes of my own rather than anything actually reasonable!' dynamic the quack has going on with their victim. Ugh. Aren't you supposed to live in a country with LAWS? And people with a monopoly on force to enforce them?!

Tie her up, let her 'patient' keep watch on her.
Hunker down here for the night. Wait out the rest of the night.

Later, since all this was the property of a mass-murdering quack anyway, you can sell it all on dbay and take a vacation!

>>1090824
I like the way you think. Leaving the fake doctor behind as a "meal" should allow us to shelter for the night elsewhere and avoid retaliation. Is there any rope anywhere though? If not, straight up killing the quack is what we'll have to settle for.
We can carry the patient in the wheelbarrow with whatever wood is left.

I don't think that killing the quack is necessary. Just knock the quack out and leave the unconscious body on the floor with its lumps. Take the wood, take the prisoner, and wheel them back home. If the harvesters show up there, they can answer to George. Either he shoots them, or they eat him and leave with full stomachs, and either way we come out ahead.

Inject him. Take his clothes. Replace the 'patient's clothes with his. Swap their places. Take the wheelbarrow and go back to your house as a ''prisoner''.

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/05/29(Wed)18:02 No. 1092050 ID: 15a025
File 171703096922.png - (295.14KB , 500x500 , 26.png )

>Knock the doc out.
>Just knock the quack out and leave the unconscious body on the floor with its lumps.
>Leaving the fake doctor behind as a "meal" should allow us to shelter for the night elsewhere.

Gretchen: “Time for a taste of your own medicine doc.”

I bash’em in the head with the blunt end of the axe. Should keep’em out cold for a bit.

>Tie them to a chair facing the door to the outside.
>Is there any rope anywhere
>Doc snootmask had someone trapped, without hope and knowing things were coming to feed on her. Its only fair she experiences it too.

Conveniently there is! I take a quick moment to tie this jerk to a chair.

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/05/29(Wed)18:03 No. 1092051 ID: 15a025
File 171703099576.png - (9.81KB , 800x800 , 27.png )

>Rescue the victim.
>Have them help start to recover the wood and cart.
>We can carry the patient in the wheelbarrow with whatever wood is left.

I don’t waste anytime, I yell down the stairs for them to come up and meet me outside.
They don’t protest, and by the time they’re outside I’ve already got what’s left of my wood in the wheelbarrow.

Gretchen: “Think you can get in the wheelbarrow and hold my ax?”

Patient: “I-what?”

Gretchen: “You wanna get out of here or what? You don’t look like you can run for long, so I’ll just have to push ya in the wheelbarrow.”

Patient: “With all that wood? H-how am I gonna fit?”

I groan and I lift her up in the wheelbarrow, and give her the ax. I grunt as I lift up the wheelbarrow and get a move on.

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/05/29(Wed)18:03 No. 1092052 ID: 15a025
File 171703102043.png - (6.36KB , 800x800 , 28.png )

As we make our get away, I start to notice the wheelbarrow tracks are fading. It’s getting harder to see.

Patient: “Oh, umm… excuse me. A-are we almost where you’re going? I-ah-ah’m-“
She let’s out a loud sneeze

Gretchen: ”Bless you…”

Patient: “It’s really cold.”

Well, if there’s anyone after us that sneeze probably alerted them. This poor sick deer probably isn’t going to last long in the cold either. I gotta get home quickly, but how am I going to find my way back?

>>1092052
If it hasnt snowed, your tracks should be visible.
Follow them back.

Just be careful the closer you get to the spot with the masked juggler you beaned on the way in.

>>1092052
You've got wood. Do you have anything that can light it on fire? She'll be able to hold the makeshift torch.

If you have even a little light you should still be able to find your way. Just keep an ear out for anyone stalking you.

In the Harvesters are anything to be worried about, then lighting a beacon may not be the best idea. Hightailing it home in spite of the patient's weak condition might be the best ticket, following the tracks while they last. I'm sure you can get at least to your backyard if you hurry, and from there you can go from experience.

If the patient is cold, maybe you can tuck them under some wood? Just pile it up on top? Might help keep a body in the wheelbarrow, too, instead of popping out on the first bump.

Let's burn a couple logs.

But we won't huddle next to them, oh no.

We are setting up an ambush. When the daddy-long-legs or whatever they were called come to investigate, we lay in hiding nearby and get them.

>>1092240

not a bad idea... waiting in ambush from some thorny thicket so they can't come at you from behind. You and the other deer can use your body heat to keep each other warm while you wait.

Makeshift torch works for keeping girlie warm. As for navigation… Follow the tracks as long as you can? They might be fading, but they’re all you have until they’re gone. Make that torch fast and then start hoofing it. (Y’know, cuz deer have hooves?)

1/2 Buckwheat 2024/06/29(Sat)21:40 No. 1093603 ID: 15a025
File 171972245846.png - (8.05KB , 800x800 , 29.png )

>You've got wood. Do you have anything that can light it on fire? She'll be able to hold the makeshift torch.
>If you have even a little light you should still be able to find your way.
>Makeshift torch works for keeping girlie warm.

YEAH! Had to take George’s matches away because he won’t quit smoking his pipe in the house!

I stop pushing and have her hand me a log and the ax.

Patient: “W-why are you stopping?”

Gretchen: “Getting hard to see my tracks back home and you’re gonna freeze at this rate.”

Patient: “Thi-this d-doesn’t look like a safe place to camp!”

Gretchen: “We ain’t camping out here, are you nuts? I’m chopping up a little torch for you to hold.”
I dig around my pockets for a match.
Gretchen: “You’re just in luck too, last one in the box.”
I run it across one side of the makeshift torch and light it.
I lay the ax back on her lap and give her the torch.
Gretchen: “Now careful not to drop it, last thing I need to be pushing is a burning wheelbarrow.”

I push on and on and on and on and on and on and on…

2/2 Buckwheat 2024/06/29(Sat)21:42 No. 1093604 ID: 15a025
File 171972254790.png - (135.72KB , 500x500 , 30.png )

Until finally we make it home.

I open the door and hurry her inside.

Gretchen: “George! George! Get in here and help!”

George: “Yeah yeah, I’ll get up when they cut to comm-HEY! Hey what did I say about surprise guests! Damn it, that better not be one of the in laws!”

You know what, I don’t have time for George’s whining. I gotta figure out or find something to patch this poor thing with. Now let’s see…what kinda remedies can I mix up to treat her? She's got bite wounds, gashes, maybe a cold?

>>1093604

Bite wounds, gashes... got any whiskey?

>Hey what did I say about surprise guests
Yeah well we're gonna have more any minute, there's a buncha nutjobs out tonight.

Just clean and bandage for now, disinfectant if you have it.

>>1093607

A bunch of psychopathically violent criminal nutjobs that think they're vampires! GET YOUR GUN!

>>1093604

Blankets. Heated blankets if you can get them heated quickly. Get some warm but not scalding mild herbal tea with honey in it for her. Clean and disinfect her wounds. Clean and bandage her. Get a fire going in the fireplace, set her in front of it. Get her a bunch of tissues and a bin for them. Get her a comfy chair she can relax and maybe doze in.

>>1093604
Clean out the wounds with high proof alcohol, and make sure you use CLEAN bandages too. You got a first aid kit? She may want some pain relievers too.

Oh, and you might want to think about barricading the doors and windows.

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:50 No. 1093616 ID: 15a025
File 171977703758.png - (1.26MB , 836x784 , 31_CRT.png )

>Yeah well we're gonna have more any minute, there's a buncha nutjobs out tonight.
>violent criminal nutjobs that think they're vampires! GET YOUR GUN!
SHIT! They could easily be following my tracks still!

Gretchen: “Damn it George! GO GET YOUR GUN! CRIMINAL NUSTJOBS COULD BE ON THE PROPERTY ANY SECOND NOW!”

George: “I SAID I WILL HELP OUT, WHEN IT’S COMM-“

Sports Announcer: “This is Patrick Stagg with ESDN, and we’ll be seeing you for the final quarter. Right after these sponsored messages.”

He mumbles to himself…

George: “Alright alright, I’ll go get the shotgun. If I don’t see anyone out there by the time the games back on I’m getting back in me chair!”

I whisper to the poor roughed up deer,
Gretchen: ”’Bout time he got up off that chair. He’s always like this on football night.”

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:52 No. 1093617 ID: 15a025
File 171977712521.png - (167.64KB , 500x500 , 32.png )

I take the poor thing into the other room and start digging around for anything helpful…

>got any whiskey?
No, that’s George’s. Not allowed to touch it, like I would anyway. Course it would be helpful now.

>Clean and bandage her.
>make sure you use CLEAN bandages too.
What, you think I’m dumb enough to give her used and dirty bandages? I get the first-aid kit and carefully dab over her snoot gashes with a alcohol soaked cotton ball.

Patient: “Oou! Ah! Ssss! Tha-that stings!
”
Gretchen: “Sit still just a bit more, now lemme git a big bandage on that.”

Hm, can’t exactly wrap gauze around that. Less I wanna end up muzzling her with’em. Guess sticking a few small ones will have to do. Then I get her arm wrapped up and take care of her bite marks as well.

Gretchen: “They sure did a number on you. Poor thing.”

Patient: “I-i-don’t remind me.”

Gretchen: “Oh, sorry. Well...here come on now, let’s get you warmed up by the fire."

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:52 No. 1093618 ID: 15a025
File 171977714972.png - (235.09KB , 500x500 , 33.png )

I get the fireplace and stove going and wrap her up in a bundle of blankets.

>Get some warm but not scalding mild herbal tea with honey in it for her.
Gretchen: “Do you like tea?”

Patient: “I-uh…sure!”

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/06/30(Sun)12:52 No. 1093619 ID: 15a025
File 171977717464.png - (323.01KB , 500x500 , 34.png )

I get a kettle on the stove and start boiling some water. It’ll take a bit before the water’s ready. Is there anything I should talk to her or George about? Maybe I should get something else on the stove too…

> with a alcohol soaked cotton ball.

Better hope George doesn't find out!

No really, isowhatever alcohol is fine too, if whiskey isn't an option.

Can't hurt to put on a pot of soup.

>>1093630
Yeah soup. Its a long night ahead

>>1093619
Thin soup.

While it simmers check all your doors are locked.
Then sit and while she eats ask her name.
Where shes from.
Smallest of small talk.
If you see george tell him to keep that gun close even when the game is back on.
The things out there are dangerous.

Is it physically possible to get George to acknowledge the seriosity of this here situation? As insufferable as he’s being right now, I’m guessing we *don’t* want him dead. Show him the girl, emphasize what state she was in when you FOUND her. Shit is getting real, and if he doesn’t get his shit together, his shit will get eaten alive by whatever the hell is out there.

You should ask for her name. Kinda rude to just keep calling her patient.

...George already got eaten alive, didn't he.

My one recommendation is to make sure that wherever you're hunkered down, George is between you and the doors. Let any interlopers run into him first, and with any luck, the business end of his shotgun will take care of them.

Let's go talk to George and say something short but impationated, like "George, what's happened to us lately? We barely care about each other anymore. You were even willing to let our house be broken into if it let you have a few more minutes of game Time! What made you lose interest in everything else? Was it me? If we live through this, I want you to know that I miss you, I miss what we had, and I wish we can have it again." *handsqueeze*

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:47 No. 1093890 ID: 15a025
File 172032763027.png - (347.42KB , 500x500 , 35.png )

>Can't hurt to put on a pot of soup.
>Yeah soup. It’s a long night ahead
>Thin soup.
My stomach starts to rumble, reminding me of why I went out in the first place. Maybe if George behaves and stays on watch, he can have some too. It’ll have to be carrot stew though, about all we have left.

>Is it physically possible to get George to acknowledge the seriosity of this here situation? As insufferable as he’s being right now, I’m guessing we *don’t* want him dead.

As much as I’d love to bash his head in, especially today, I’d be devastated and lonely without him. As for taking it seriously, well… he’ll probably shoot anything or anyone that interrupts the game that isn’t me.

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:47 No. 1093891 ID: 15a025
File 172032766483.png - (323.84KB , 500x500 , 36.png )

>Then sit and while she eats, ask her name. Where shes from. Smallest of small talk.
It’s going to be a bit before that stew’s finished. I sit down for a moment and chit-chat with our guest.

Patrick Stagg: “And we’re back! This is Patrick Stagg bringing you here for the final quarter!”

Of course you are, and here comes George stampeding back to his chair, gun in tow.
Gretchen: “George be careful! You’re gonna end up-“

George: “Zip it, games back on.”

Gretchen: “George you need to keep watch-“

George: “And who is this disgusting, sickly looking creature you’ve dragged into the house anyway?!”

George: “Come on now, your nose is running like a faucet! Wife gave you a box of tissues, use the damn things!”

She looks over and blows through a few tissues.

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:48 No. 1093892 ID: 15a025
File 172032768670.png - (7.94KB , 800x800 , 37.png )

Patient: “S-sorry. Uh… My name’s Gretta. Gretta Grismiller.”

George: “GRISMILLER? You? You’re a Grismiller?!”

Gretchen: “Who? George we don’t know any-”

George: “Gregg Gristmiller! You know, only the owner of the biggest lumber yard and hardware store in the state Gretchen!”

Gretta: “Oh! Y-you know my father?”

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/06(Sat)21:54 No. 1093893 ID: 15a025
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George: “Well, not personally. I just shop at one of his stores is all.”

Gretta: “O…oh.”

Gretchen: “Something wrong deery?”

George: “Yeah! Quit yer yappin so I can hear what’s going on!”

Gretchen: “I wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to Gretta.”

He turns the volume up on tv again.

Gretta: “I-it’s nothing.”

George: “Don’t you have dinner or something cookin? That skinny th- I mean... your guest is probably starving!”

...Is your husband a hardcore religious zealot?
Ask Gretchen if she's on... good terms with her dad. Because the serials who captured her would be pretty stupid to intentionally mess with the richest asshole in the state.

>>1093893
ETA on the soup?

This George is a real piece of work, Gretchen, and if he's the only thing between you and a devastating loneliness, then I hope you've been considering expanding your support network.

But more immediately, you have a lumber magnate's daughter in your house, and she may be hotly pursued by maniacs who are willing to kill. Does her dad's company log these woods? Is that why she was kidnapped, to be a bargaining chip with her father's company? How was she kidnapped,anyway? It might be a good thing to ask about.

>>1093893
She sounded worried he knew her father...
Run away taken advantage of maybe...
Poor greta.

Soup for her.
Maybe an extra blanket over the shoulders.

Let her rest a little and eat before figuring out what to do next.

1/3 Buckwheat 2024/07/17(Wed)19:32 No. 1094393 ID: 15a025
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>Does her dad's company log these woods?
Gretchen: “Does your dad or his company log in these woods?”

Gretta: “Hm…no I don’t think he does. Maybe not yet anyway.”

George: “Ain’t no way I’d be selling our trees to some flapjack munchin wood jockeys. Not even to another man I respect."

Gretchen: “No one asked you George, go back to your football game.”

>How was she kidnapped,anyway? It might be a good thing to ask about.
Gretchen: “Gretta. I know it’s a hard question to ask, but how did you get kidnapped in the first place?”

Gretta: “Well, I was back on campus heading to my night class, when something went over my head! I freaked out and fell over. Things were pretty hazy after that. Last thing I remember was waking up in that basement.”

2/3 Buckwheat 2024/07/17(Wed)19:36 No. 1094394 ID: 15a025
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TV: “OH! INTERCEPTION, and just before the ten yard line!”

George: “WHAT A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT! Come on get your act together!”

Gretchen: “George! Don’t interrupt our guests. We’re still up a few points anyway…”

George: “Wait, what was that?”

Gretchen: “Nothing dear.”

George: "No not you! Ah never mind. Must be windy outside, receptions getting a little fuzzy."

>ETA on the soup?

Maybe some warm food will help everyone here. Wait, soup? Oh no! I started making a stew not soup. Ah well, not like George’ll know either way.

The tea kettle starts whistling, so I take care of that first. I carefully pour a cup for Gretta and dip a tea bag in. I check my carrots for the stew but they don’t seem ready yet-

*THUMP*

I freeze in place. A single knock?

*THUMP*

*THUMP*

No, it almost sounds like it’s coming from abo-

3/3 Buckwheat 2024/07/17(Wed)19:37 No. 1094395 ID: 15a025
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George: “ARE YOU KIDDING ME! RIGHT IN THE FINAL QUARTER OF THE GAME!”

Gretchen: “George be quiet! There’s some weird noises on the roof!”

George: “TV SIGNAL IS CUTTING OUT RIGHT AS IT HITS THE LAST FIVE MINUTES!”

"It's probably the insane wannabe-vampire violently homicidal criminals destroying the antenna or something. Why they care about the TV antenna... well, I did say 'insane', didn't I?"

"Great, the 'doctor' cut our fuse box. George, please murder whoever did this with your shotgun."

They stole your wood and now they're after your antenna! George's turn to deal with these hooligans.

>>1094395
Oh.
NOW hes motivated...

Reassure your guest. She's going to be worried.

Then you can tell your hubby that first they came for the wood, now they want his gametime.
It sounded like one was on the roof, so warn him.
If he does go storming out there he may get ambushed so watch his back from the door. If he forgets the shotgun, you remember it.

Oh no! Its a trap to get George outside and leave you and Gretta defenseless. Fire shots at the roof to scare them.

Santa?!

>>1094434
That big jolly bastard probably likes curling. Damn him and his deer enslaving ways.

1/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:58 No. 1094597 ID: 15a025
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>Reassure your guest. She's going to be worried.
I ignore George for now and bring Gretta her tea.

>They stole your wood and now they're after your antenna! George's turn to deal with these hooligans.
>you can tell your hubby that first they came for the wood, now they want his gametime.
Gretchen: “Have some tea and warm up a little bit. George’ll go outside and get the antenna fixed. Won’t you George?

He grumbles and fumbles with his gun out.

Gretchen: “First it was our wood, and now it’s the antenna. When are you going to do something about this George!”

George: “Now listen here woman! If there’s anyone up on that roof messing with my antenna, I’m blastin them off to Hell! I also want a play-by-play report of what I missed.”

Gretchen: “George, I’ll write verbatim what the announcers and coaches say. JUST TAKE CARE OF THE DAMN CRIMINALS ON OUR ROOF!”

He gives me a pen and pad.

George: “About time you offer to do something useful.” He then stomps out the front door, gun in tow.

Gretchen: [smal]”Alright, no dinner for George it is then.”[/small]

2/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:58 No. 1094598 ID: 15a025
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I go back to my stew, trying to ignore the loud footsteps on the roof.

George: ”YOU LITTLE SCUM BAG! YOU DON’T GET BETWEEN A MAN AND HIS HOMETEAM ON GAMENIGHT!”

A gunshot booms from the roof. Hopefully that’s the last of-

3/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:59 No. 1094599 ID: 15a025
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The front door slams open, a very muscular bear with a mask is standing on my porch.

4/4 Buckwheat 2024/07/21(Sun)17:59 No. 1094600 ID: 15a025
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He has my ax.

Step 1: Ask him to put the ax down.
Step 2: Flash your tits.
Step 3: Bolt for Gretchen.
Step 4: Escape out the window.

That stew is scalding hot. You can probably just throw the stew at him, drench him in it

Did the other masked dude even react to injury? Burns might not work. You probably have other items you could use here, like throwing pots and pans at him.
The axe is a problem though; if he swings that at you, you need to either not get hit, or put something sturdy between you and him.

You should call for help from George, and look around for something to trip the masked man up, like some oil or something else he'd trip on like a bunch of marbles.

>>1094603
stew blinding is a good plan, but you'll need to wait till he approaches close enough.

>>1094603
This
.
Back away.
Let him get close,
then its dinner time!
And while hes reeling, beat him around the head with any pan you have.
Just imagine hes george in those angry fantasies you sometimes have thatd youd never really do.

He has your axe!

Hold a pan for defense, as it will probably make for a better shield than nothing, even if it is an axe.

Picture these weirdos as the football players and that awful, awful Patrick Stagg from that stinkin' ESDN that keeps your husband hooked to the boob tube.

Then grab the boiling pot.

He has your axe? Your axe, that you gave to Gretchen? How did he get it, where did she put it?

If he's that prime a specimen, you'll have to fight smarter, not harder. Scalding him might give you a second, but it won't stop him, especially if these maskers can shrug off things that would make most people recoil. You're burning the wood you recovered in that stove, right? Would it be worth it to try setting the intruder on fire?

>>1094708
And risk getting the house on fire? Not smart. Scalding him with the stew is a good way to get him to stop for a moment. After that, I don't know, shove a poker in his neck? The biggest knife we can find? Even if he's tough as shit, boiling stew is boiling stew.