4/5 Deem 2026/01/29(Thu)10:24 No. 1120511 ID: 84d23c
File 176968227703.png - (45.85KB , 750x750 , big_breakfast.png )

I am having breakfast. I don't feel refreshed at all. I am plagued by stupid worries.

Something isn't right.

"Look Deem, it was just one batch of silly potions." Hin says to me. "No-one's going to be judging your whole dungeon off it! So what if some of your denizens got a little silly about it? No-one's to blame!"

"I think you might have some sort of ulterior motive there." I say sourly.

"I'm not silly, I'm very mature." She puffs out her chest. "And I've changed my mind, maybe you should blame yourself, Ms Fecund Earth Dungeon."

"I'm not going to do that." How dare she even joke about that. I am not running that sort of dungeon.

5/5 Deem 2026/01/29(Thu)10:25 No. 1120512 ID: 84d23c
File 176968230755.png - (35.20KB , 900x600 , we_saw_you_from_across_the_bar.png )

An ENEMY draws near!

What?!

Olan's here for the tour early? This is the worst possible time! Barely anything is ready! Half my denizens are bulbous and hung over from suspicious potions! It's going to leave the worst possible impression! What am I going to do about this?!

Delegate instructions to prepare for the tour, while you go and talk to him, see if you can gently get him to come back later.

Tell the troops to assemble! Inspect them and see who’s fit for duty. Remember, this run is rigged anyway - they don’t have to win, they just have to lose gracefully.
Have Stargazer greet them - the pantomime should add to the confusion until you actually arrive.

Do a safety briefing. Make sure your patron has a church pendant in case of catching strays. Please keep your arms and legs inside the dungeon while the game is in motion.

>>1120512
Oh god, a rich kid coming EARLY?!
>>1120513
terrible idea! will leave a souring impression!

Possibly stall for time with a chat over tea... though it IS breakfast so he might've eaten already...
Get everyone into position, use magic to get everyone into shape, place the loot, clean everything up. If worse comes to worse you can explain that that universe is conspiring against you.

>>1120512
Okay, look, we agree you don't run that sort of dungeon, and you certainly should do all you can to avoid looking that way, but this guy radiates the aura of someone who might be into that sort of thing.

I'm not saying we should lean into it! Absolutely not. But we shouldn't, like, vehemently deny it or anything. If he makes an assumption that goes in our favor, that's all the better, right?

Do the responsible Fantasy Overlord thing and go send your minions to die!

Start birthing baby bombs! Let these fools enter cuteness proximity while you remote-detonate your giggling traps.

Okay but seriously do a quick recap of what works and form a quicker strategy. You don't need optimal performance, just enough to win by attrition. This is a raid, not a war.

>>1120512
Play hardball. Lock the front door. They are not here when they are meant to be. If they invade then they are subject to the rules of the Game. It will not be a tour. If you can manage to talk to them before they get in, you can tell them there has been an incident which will paint you in an unfavorable light. I don't know what our options are for boob reduction and hangover recovery. How long would it take? ...wait, you're currently shaped modestly. What if you used the Deemeggs to reshape those who are improperly shaped? If you can do that quickly enough, then maybe we don't need to delay them or anything, but we do need to verify exactly how this tour is supposed to go- are they both fighting? Are they both carrying resurrection charms?
Inspect your troops. Whoever is fit for duty after treatment, deploy them. Whoever is an embarrassment, sideline them. We just got some new monsters, we can pad out/strengthen encounters with those. Hin is definitely going to be fighting today. Hmm, could she make a good end boss? ...wait, Hin is the one who is known for drinking too many potions, how did SHE manage to resist temptation?
Also exactly how much of that dream happened? Did Moriko turn into an alien titty monster? If not, why did you dream that she did, hmmmmmm?

Scold Stargazer for not resisting the Winze. At least now you know what the Winze is likely to do when unmonitored... and tell the others that you expect them to represent the dungeon during invasions, so they should be fighting fit at all times, or at least in a condition that they can recover from quickly enough to be presentable.

Showing up on time is an amateur move.
Showing up late is a power play.
Showing up early? What a shrewd man, he *wants* to see you at your worst!

its not that sort of dungeon, no. But you could hint at it being so. The fecund earth's hidden mysteries etc. Dance of the seven veils and all that. If he finds such things sexual, well that's on him.

To that end, whoever is plumpened, get some costumes, tasteful ones, and get to the front door to distract while everyone else gets organized.

1/3 Deem 2026/05/03(Sun)11:21 No. 1126174 ID: 60c867
File 177780726985.png - (131.85KB , 800x800 , deboobed_at_what_cost.png )

>I don't know what our options are for boob reduction and hangover recovery. How long would it take? ...wait, you're currently shaped modestly. What if you used the Deemeggs to reshape those who are improperly shaped?
I have a much simpler option than that. After getting permission from Hin, I shrink myself into my Distill Mode and tap into the ready-to-cast spell of In My Image. It will overlay any magic affecting her with the magic affecting me, and as I have partaken of none of those magical effects it should purge it from Hin's system. I discharge the spell into her, and it works as intended: Hin's chest is returned to its normal state.

She looks at me and her eyes light up. "Oh Deem, your small shape's so cute!" She grabs me in a hug. I did not agree to this! I struggle.

"Zzzzz."

...

She fell asleep. Was the purge of her system really that strenuous? She's still not letting go...

>If worse comes to worse you can explain that that universe is conspiring against you.
Excuses! That reeks of weakness. Even though it is.

I struggle free of a hug-hungry ogre and, somewhat disheveled, go to find my other denizens. This doesn't seem like a solution if it's going to put people to sleep even if I can stall until I have a second cast ready.

>Hin is the one who is known for drinking too many potions, how did SHE manage to resist temptation?
A lack of peer pressure I assume! Maybe she had a busier night than I realised if that's enough to put her under.

>We just got some new monsters, we can pad out/strengthen encounters with those.
No we can't. I was planning to mutate those, and I have yet to do any work on properly taming them or habituating them to my dungeon.

>Have Stargazer greet them - the pantomime should add to the confusion until you actually arrive.
I'm not certain where Stargazer - or Reisarf are. Merud too. They must be up in the hidden valley.

>Also exactly how much of that dream happened? Did Moriko turn into an alien titty monster? If not, why did you dream that she did, hmmmmmm?
I'm too busy for this nonsense. I maintain some awareness of my dungeon, even when asleep. It must have been extrapolated from the real potion tests!

2/3 Deem 2026/05/03(Sun)11:23 No. 1126175 ID: 60c867
File 177780741430.png - (252.32KB , 900x650 , blobs_and_boulders.png )

>Tell the troops to assemble! Inspect them and see who’s fit for duty.
I'm able to quickly marshall Kali, Linea and some of my golems.

When did my dungeon become infested with preposterously-shaped gigantic women?!

"You are stressed, Deem?" Moriko says, bending over to inspect me.

I eye her and my other denizens warily, lest a second of my denizens decide I am looking particularly grabbable today. "Olan is outside!"

My hammerai straightens up and thumps her chest. "Then we'll show them what this dungeon is all about!"

"Do you think you can fight like that?" I ask her.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kali says from the side.

Linea whistles. "Is there a problem, Deem?"

I feel like something is gnawing on me. I don't have time for this.

>Remember, this run is rigged anyway - they don’t have to win, they just have to lose gracefully.
That's right, arguments with snarky slimes will have to wait. I think my hammerai might be moving in certain ways just to get my attention too as she starts getting the others organised. Every time I look at her she seems extra bouncy. Has everyone's brains gone rotten at some point? I have to flee from a frank conversation about what exactly Moriko wants from me too. There are enemies about!

>Okay, look, we agree you don't run that sort of dungeon, and you certainly should do all you can to avoid looking that way, but this guy radiates the aura of someone who might be into that sort of thing.
>I'm not saying we should lean into it! Absolutely not. But we shouldn't, like, vehemently deny it or anything. If he makes an assumption that goes in our favor, that's all the better, right?
>Its not that sort of dungeon, no. But you could hint at it being so.
Ngah!

>Get everyone into position, use magic to get everyone into shape, place the loot, clean everything up.
Argh we'll have to work with what we've got, since a mix of slimes and golems was planned as the opener. That'll give some time to locate my missing denizens, and move Hin and my newly recruited monsters out of harm's way. Being down Hin is really hurting my flexibility. I have those eggs as an option still...

But before anything, I need more time!

>Do a safety briefing.
>Possibly stall for time with a chat over tea... though it IS breakfast so he might've eaten already...
>We do need to verify exactly how this tour is supposed to go- are they both fighting? Are they both carrying resurrection charms?
I have some things I'll need to ask Olan anyway.

3/3 Deem 2026/05/03(Sun)11:24 No. 1126177 ID: 60c867
File 177780747311.png - (82.71KB , 900x600 , pancake_is_not_an_option.png )

>Showing up on time is an amateur move.
>Showing up late is a power play.
>Showing up early? What a shrewd man, he wants to see you at your worst!
He has not earned my affection with this move and he is very far from seeing my at my worst!

>To that end, whoever is plumpened, get some costumes, tasteful ones, and get to the front door to distract while everyone else gets organized.
I'm heading to the entrance now to intercept Olan, his suspicious-looking companion, and their imminent threat to my mental and spiritual well-being. I need to stall them. Should I go it alone, or take someone with me?

My thoughts cloud with dread at either thought.

>>1126174
There's an obvious explanation here. Hin was abusing potions to stay awake, and you dispelled that so now she's sleeping normally. Didn't we have coffee or something?
Well, it's either that or somehow you've got a magical effect that causes sleepiness, but I doubt it.

>>1126174
>It must have been extrapolated from the real potion tests!
Hmm, yet she isn't in alien form. So either the alien form she got wore off, or your dream heavily exaggerated its effects and they aren't immediately obvious from looking at her now.

>>1126177
First, ask why they're early. Tell them one of your denizens is incapacitated for unclear reasons so you can't give them the full experience... and you may need a moment to find a few. Last night was potion testing and things got out of hand. (that should be a decent enough explanation)
So give them a choice- they can see you at your best if they wait for a bit, or they can see how you adapt to being caught at a disadvantage.

>alone?
Fuck no, meet them with a battle group. They might attack without even bothering to discuss things, and it would be within their rights of the Labyrinth Game, wouldn't it? You don't want to get banished before you've even rallied your troops!
If a fight breaks out, apply some buffs but retreat before they can break through to attack you. Come to think of it, that's a decent strategy, for there to be a unit that can apply buffs to allies, but they don't stick around past the beginning of the fight, and retreat to support the next group in the dungeon, and so on until they're at the last group and can't run anymore.

Take the bustiest one with you

Bring Moriko, so you’re not outnumbered. Surely she would never embarrass her boss in front of a client.

If you're wondering what's going on, we developed an addictive sex-enhancing potion and one of its effects is hindering nearby witnesses' ability to understand what debauchery they're looking at.
We're gonna be rich.

Take one of the giant golems with you.

Bring Moriko, she's always been the most level headed. At least on matters other than herself.

she's the most intimidating anyway

1/5 Deem 2026/05/19(Tue)14:52 No. 1126997 ID: d0b006
File 177920234674.png - (92.64KB , 800x800 , mystery_solved.png )

>There's an obvious explanation here. Hin was abusing potions to stay awake, and you dispelled that so now she's sleeping normally. Didn't we have coffee or something?
>Well, it's either that or somehow you've got a magical effect that causes sleepiness, but I doubt it.
I see.

I think I understand then.

2/5 Deem 2026/05/19(Tue)14:54 No. 1126999 ID: d0b006
File 177920249774.png - (139.20KB , 850x750 , pancake_was_also_there.png )

>Bring Moriko, she's always been the most level headed.
>She's the most intimidating anyway.
>Take the bustiest one with you.
"Moriko, you might as well come along." I say.

"I'll show them all that I've got!" She bounces to my side. This was a mistake. I regret this already. She is certainly intimidating I suppose. I might have to put my denizens on a diet if things like this are really going to happen. I resolutely ignore her.

Moriko frowns as Pancake rolls back into place to cover the old dungeon entrance behind us. "Is something wrong?"

I huff. "Yes, everything is wrong, "It doesn't matter anyway. but we'll see about fixing that shortly."

"Do you need a hug?"

I feel an inexplicable yearning. "N-no!"

>She isn't in alien form.
I would expect a potion to wear off overnight for most cases, so that's right. It's not like Hin's transformation where she should be a lizard until after our upcoming little dungeon tour.

Olan and his mystery companion are ahead.

3/5 Deem 2026/05/19(Tue)14:55 No. 1127000 ID: d0b006
File 177920254736.png - (126.52KB , 800x800 , choosing_violence.png )

>Surely she would never embarrass her boss in front of a client.
I'm not going to let it come to that.

>If a fight breaks out-
I club Olan with my sword. Fittingly he crumples like a puppet with his strings cut.

"I know you now." I say to his companion. "You should have run away and never come back."

I am still dreaming.

I'm embarrassed to see I've almost fallen to such a trick. Something creeping into my dreams to ambush me. My fits of sleep from lack of mana and the bad dreams plaguing me must have looked too tempting.

I thought that night hag had fled far from here, or died from its wounds. How dare it think it's worthy to strike at me again.

"You stole that priest girl from me!" she shrieks. "You took my eye!"

"I should have torn you to pieces after all." I say. "Or you should have saved me the time and just crawled off somewhere to die."

4/5 Deem 2026/05/19(Tue)14:58 No. 1127001 ID: d0b006
File 177920273305.png - (125.62KB , 800x800 , and_you_have_no_friends.png )

The world darkens. It stinks of delirious magic. I'm not impressed. I don't have to jump in front of a long-wound nightmare curse to shield some idiot girl this time.

"But then I crept about the edges of the wretched dreams of an ancient, frightful power and I realised the truth. You're weak. You're all but used up! You and your fears are all just pitiful, you rotten old husk!"

I shift uncertainly, where is this unwarranted confidence coming from? Does this demon really think that it can catch me in some trap with with my eyes right on it?

"And the most pathetic thing is you're not even wrong. Everything you fear will happen, and it is all your fault! Your pets don't see you with the terror you are due. They will misuse your gifts. They might offer you their love but your cold, misshapen heart won't accept it!"

My head is whirling. How dare it, how could it know? It's not true, I-

"And then they are going to leave you!"

My chest hurts. My head hurts.

"You can see it, and you know it is coming, but you're so mentally feeble you'll never do anything about it! Because you are afraid of them! Because your heart is the wrong kind! Because you're broken, and you know you'll never be whole again! Because you couldn't tell them, even if you tried!"

"You're the cursed child of a vanished people and you will never-"

5/5 Deem 2026/05/19(Tue)14:59 No. 1127002 ID: d0b006
File 177920275317.png - (45.34KB , 900x600 , choosing_violence_again.png )

I don't have to hear this! I won't allow this!

1) Hurt it.

2) Kill it.

3) Tear it to pieces.

Ouch, forced to acknowledge the elephant in the room! 3's the most viscerally satisfying, go for it.

>>1127002
There are other ways to shut it up, such as occupying its mouth.
> 4) Kiss it

Rip and tear, until it is done.
Then utilize its fragments for something embarrassing, like making an imp

Take her other eye.

>>1127001
>"And then they are going to leave you!"
Are we meant to be included in this? because if so, she's dead wrong. We're here to stay, you're not getting rid of us easily.

>>1127002
Just make sure you're attacking the right thing, Deem. This looks like a setup. What if you're sleepwalking?

this thing's talking utter rot. shred it

>>1127012
I agree with this. Try to not accidentally kill your denizens!

>>1127020
Indeed - it seems too smart to simply goad you into killing it; it likely has something up its sleeve. Be careful.

>>1127012
If she is sleepwalking then she has already punched Olan, so it can't get much worse.
Hurt it, this parasite isn't worth expending even one percent of your power.

>>1127025
>so it can't get much worse.
Accidentally killing one of our denizens is EXACTLY how it can get much worse!

>>1127041
Don't worry, they're insured.

4) Ask her if she wants bigger boobies.

1/5 Deem 2026/05/21(Thu)06:48 No. 1127053 ID: 983ae4
File 177934611164.png - (193.06KB , 1000x600 , seal.png )

Something is talking to me. Something is gloating. Something is urging me to take action. Something is whispering awful temptations. Something is annoying me. I can't focus on the words. I don't want to hear the words.

My chest hurts. I cannot feel my Heart beat. It's cold. It hurts. I can't breathe. Where am I? Where is the rest of me?! Where has everyone gone? Don't leave me!

Hush now.

Your heart is still. No need to remember pain.

Forget your
f
e
a
r, abandon your hatr-
ed

- sleep away
the ages -

- kin
d
e
r to yourself,

and
to the worl-

I do not listen to you! I refuse to let a world exist that favours you!

2/5 Deem 2026/05/21(Thu)06:49 No. 1127054 ID: 983ae4
File 177934617377.png - (74.94KB , 1000x600 , stare.png )

>Try to not accidentally kill your denizens!
NO-ONE LEAVES

>Are we meant to be included in this?
NO-ONE LEAVES

>It seems too smart to simply goad you into killing it; it likely has something up its sleeve. Be careful.
WRONG

WRONG

STUPID SPITEFUL

WRETCHED

STINGING THING

IT

SAID

- DON'T LISTEN -

IT

HURTS

>Kiss it
NO

3/5 Deem 2026/05/21(Thu)06:50 No. 1127055 ID: 983ae4
File 177934622620.png - (85.89KB , 1000x600 , grab.png )

>This thing's talking utter rot. Shred it
SICK OF THE

NOISES IT MAKES

GRABBING GRASPING

HURT

IT

KILL IT

>Rip and tear, until it is done.
THIS TIME

I

TEAR IT TO

PIECES

4/5 Deem 2026/05/21(Thu)06:50 No. 1127056 ID: 983ae4
File 177934624922.png - (5.31KB , 1000x550 , kill.png )

...

5/5 Deem 2026/05/21(Thu)06:52 No. 1127057 ID: 983ae4
File 177934632911.png - (137.83KB , 900x900 , wake_up_sleepyhead.png )

Awareness creeps slowly back into my mind.

I am awake this time.

I feel empty. Listless.

I am so tired of feeling tired.

I should do away with sleep entirely. That might be best. I spent most of the past two thousand years asleep, and I am a fool to constantly let sleep sneak up on me so soon after.

My golem body feels bad today. I can barely see. Noises are too loud or too quiet. I feel disconnected, disjointed. I lie in this bed as scattered impressions of that nightmare continue to settle uneasily on my waking mind.

I wish they would not. I should be better than some silly trick like that.

>Then utilize its fragments for something embarrassing, like making an imp
>Take her other eye.
Gained Night Hag Eye. Its accusing stare will help bad dreams come true. Cursed.

...

It's gross and wet in my hand. It is making a mess of my sheets.

>Ask her if she wants bigger boobies.
Leave me alone.

I don't even have the excuse that it was some long wound curse this time. I should get up, I should stop dwelling on this. I should find out what stupid situations my denizens got into that inspired my nightmares. I should make sure we have a plan for if Olan really does come early.

It's all so difficult.

Maybe I should lie here a little longer.

If the titties motivate you to get out of bed and get Olan contingencies into place then bigger boobies it is. Back to work, Deem.

>>1127057
Nah, now is not the time to be alone with your thoughts.

>>1127057
Deem, you need to know that we love you, even if we love teasing you too. It's not fair what happened to you. Yes, I am saying this, even knowing that I am probably the soul of one of your denizens that you've bound to yourself somehow via some kind of horrible necromancy. You don't have to worry about me leaving. I'd never leave you like this.

That said, you do need to talk to someone about your trauma, before the seal breaks. It would be embarrassing for you to admit weakness, this is true. It would be MORE embarrassing for you to go berserk, again, and alienate everyone you've managed to gather. Much less likely to recover from, as well. They'd never let you live it down, even if they forgave you.
You can even talk to US about your trauma, even though we're not as good as a living person at being a shoulder to cry on. We've got no shoulders! Anyway, it's the most private way for you to vent. We can't exactly tell anyone else.

Considering we saw cracks in the seal, you should go check on your heart.
In case you didn't hear that, please check on your heart, for reasons.

>feeling terrible
Well, if nothing's wrong with your heart, try eating something? Or putting that eye somewhere secure?

>cursed eye
Odd, I don't remember getting one last time you fought the Night Hag, despite it saying you took its eye. Did someone else take it?
Also, weird that it died so easy and nothing bad happened...? Was it really that overconfident? Or did you catch it before it could do anything, and it was merely a doomed enemy defiantly/spitefully trying to deal as much emotional damage as it could before it died?

>what if Olan really comes early?
I mean, do the same things I guess. Preemptively this time. Make sure everyone is recovered well enough from potions in general, do as much boob-dispelling as you can manage, and then meet him in battle.

Oh, another thing. Something you said worries me. Do you want to destroy the world? I thought you just wanted to kill the Sky.

You do realize that, if people grow to like you, telling them what the Sky did to you and your people would cause them to hate the Sky as well, right?

When was the last time you got laid?

Your rage is overwhelming when your personality isn't shackling it. You need to get therapy for this or the hag's going to keep exploiting it for power. She already infected you with a curse, don't let her make the same hack over and over.

You really do need to lighten the curse load you are carrying. Bury that hag eye for the time being and do your dungeon rounds.
Perhaps leave this body in the meditation chamber while you pilot the other golems for a while. Can’t make a plan without seeing the shape of your denizens.

>>1127057
>Leave me alone.
We won't. We can't. We don't want to, either. For better or worse, you're stuck with us. Remember it, engrave it into your mind: we don't leave.

Long-term, you can work your heart over the forge to hammer it into the right shape. For now, defy the sky power and the night terrors by having a life.