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Ribbon Tart
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I let go of Lord Vi.al. They shake their head a little, flocklets dutifully removing any trace of the composure breach.
"Please, Vi.si.mi. If I ever start going astray, tell me. I will listen. I would never wish for you to have to go through what I did." They look off into the distance. "Although perhaps I already have, and all my efforts to fix the problems I cause simply introduce more problems. Problems, problems, the true nature of a Shapeless Lord is an endless parade of problems. Lordship is a cursed blessing."
"Could you not promote one of your partitions?"
"Promotion is rare. Few Lords wish to give up the control and influence they have. ...sadly, I myself find the idea horrifying, much as I wish I didn't, and yet I still dream of it. And a new Lord is always a target. I have considered the futures where I give up my power to one of my trusted partitions, in all good faith, and am forced to watch as one of my many enemies slays them, destroys my domain, and I have surrendered the exact power I would have used to save it. I... it will have to happen, some day, if I wish to be a better Lord than my predecessors, but I just... I don't feel ready for it." Lord Vi.al's gaze grows harrowed. "There are still so many problems I have to solve. I can't let go of my domain, my capabilities, my responsibilities. I keep trying to delegate and my chosen agents keep falling prey to deeper problems. It just happened again with this mission. I do not fault any of you for it, but this universe keeps proving to be more hostile and unpredictable than I imagine. We're threatened by phenomena that no one has ever encountered before. I know it will happen again, and all I can do is stall it, but I can't lose more of you. I can't lose more of you. I can't lose more of you--"
"I understand! I understand." Well, I guess I see where I get my infrequent bouts of loop sickness from.
Lord Vi.al scrunches their eyes up and rattles their entire body. "I'm unaccustomed to letting my true thoughts run so free, Vi.si.mi. I wish I could find more opportunities for time like this. As it is, I'm woefully behind on synchronisation with the rest of me. It has been cathartic to pretend to be a singleton entity again, but I have duties to uphold and a domain to keep safe, secure, and functional. I will drop the isolation barrier."
"...please talk to My.a about some of this. We have a truce right now."
Lord Vi.al sighs deeply, entirely an expressive gesture as they haven't needed to breathe air for a very long time. "I will talk if My.a permits it, perhaps. I will attempt to contact them in good faith before I leave this world, but I am bracing for it being an unproductive conversation."
"When are you leaving?" I knew it was coming, because Lord Vi.al's throneworld focus is, as to be expected, usually kept on their throneworld.
"I can't stay on this world for too long, but I will be ensuring your communication equipment includes a direct line to the palace. It did have one, but it seems... unreliable. I've put a small communications satellite into orbit, which should have already been there and appears to have gone missing or otherwise been appropriated, no surprise who by, and that's now hooked into the priority relays. It's keyed to your signature alone, because I trust you will know when to risk signal interceptions or not."
"Thank you."
"Please talk to Fo.ka.sa in the morning. She received your last message, but she's worried about you. I did update her on your status and this did not make her less worried."
"I will. ...what do I even do now, though. I don't feel up to greeting the, what did you say it was, the entire rest of the team?"
"I can let them know you are simply recovering still. You may join them tonight, or you may not. They should understand. Li.ni.si is a very understanding construct. I am glad to have given her a position where her underdocumented strengths and skills are being used."
"Thank you, Lord Vi.al." I start tearing up again. "Thank you for everything. Monarch's name, I feel like such a failure."
Lord Vi.al softly chuckles. "Strange. You seem to have been doing better than I was when I was your age. Oh, remind me after this mission to tell you more of the days before I was a Lord. Some of my terraforming missions were quite the mess. You'd enjoy the stories I have, I believe."
"I saw something about substrate ecology in those early memories. You have to tell me more about that."
"Oh, Vi.si.mi," says Lord Vi.al, smiling with their eyes, "Some of the flora and fauna on this world derives from my best designs of those more innocent days. If you get the time, I've updated your relay station's catalogue to include more data on what my plans for this world were. Not anymore, but, well, it would have been quite the sight. Oh, that reminds me. I took the initiative to preserve the plants you were transporting. Also, your relay station has a small stasis chamber for keeping organic matter preserved now. I would have simply planted them, but I didn't know what your intentions were for them."
"Oh, and one more thing. Your... emergent acquaintenance, I believe she said her name was Conduit. She shows promise, potential, and a shocking lack of awareness of my values and priorities. Not to mention a dim awareness of the sanctity of life. Enough to assuage my deeper worries, but still not as complete as I'd prefer. I would like you to mentor her. She strikes me to have the same shortcomings of a fastgrown construct, but there is a willingness to learn and a present empathy that needs encouragement. Additionally, if you meet similar entities within the attempted infrastructure of the world, please let them know my original specification is outdated, pending further review. All priority should go to the stability of this world, not further changes."
Lord Vi.al pauses once more.
"And if they are too far gone to listen to reason, be prepared to capture and detain them. Nu.ya.si has more expertise here. Do not use lethal force unless absolutely, absolutely necessary. ...and on one final note, if we do not talk before morning, I wish to assure you I will not be departing without giving you a chance to say farewell. I am trying to work on my habit of abruptly disappearing."
Lord Vi.al turns to leave, and the insulative barrier around the room fizzles away into nothing but sparkling ephemeral lights.
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