>>629961
Hmm, yes, Victor could go talk to the big guy. V2 could too. If he can't see V2, we could even spy on him a little.

>>630004
He mentioned being able to see V2. Also, he's a god. Don't even think about trying to fool him. It's a bad call.

However, he also mentioned liking V2. He'd make a good ambassador.

Victor 2015/03/23(Mon)11:09 No. 630483 ID: 0a1420
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[[So be it. If that's what you want of me. When, and how, do you want us- or, rather, I, as I still do not know who this 'V2' is-]]

Who?

[[What?]]

[[...In any case. When and how am I to speak with the god?]]

I can ask him to come back to the portal we had opened before- oh, but you weren't here, were you? It's just in the left hall. But I have some questions for Vicki first, alright? Then we'll set it up.

[[I shall wait for you by the door, in any case.]]

Victor 2015/03/23(Mon)11:09 No. 630484 ID: 0a1420
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[[Oh-! ...It seems Ava will be unnecessary. I... wish I had more time to collect myself. But it would most likely be poor form to leave a god waiting.]]

Victor 2015/03/23(Mon)11:09 No. 630485 ID: 0a1420
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Victor! Buddy! What's up, you little wormy fuck? And you brought your dead head friend along! The party's starting in here, huh?

>>630485
Wassup, huge dude. So, we know about the credit card, and we'd like to know if you'll get pissed off if we use it. We have a plan for a bank heist but we may need the card anyway, because we have a lot of money to dish out before we can consider ourselves safe from the metal bitch. Would it make you happier if we bought some random/hedonistic bullshit alongside the stuff we need to survive?

Also I have a question- you said before that everyone was lying to us. Are those lies important, or little deceptions to save face?

Hey so a question first. Do you look like that by choice or does the power you wield sort of dictate how you look? Or does what people think of you change your appearance?

Just curious because we have seen all sorts of gods and they all work a bit differently depending on the dimension you are in. Don't go to the dimension where the phasebears live by the way. Its was going downhill rapidly last time we helped out there.

Also awesome throne design.

Anyways can we borrow some money? We promise we will spend our share on booze and whores if anyone gives us hands to spend it with. The rest of the team might do something useful with it though.

Normally we would have come up with some awesome plan but sometimes we get summoned after the situation is far to dire and the only stuff that will work are suicidal ideas.

Nothing like appearing while someone is already neck deep in quicksand and having to watch them go down while shrugging.

Hey dude, could you help Victor be able to remember V2? It'd make things a little less confusing.

OH WAIT, YOU LOVE THAT SHIT. NVM.

Oh, speaking of V2, how long will it last? If it lasts long enough we could use it for the bank robbery.

Victor 2015/03/25(Wed)10:24 No. 630949 ID: 0a1420
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You kids are all business. No grace or respect. No grovelling before me. No fucking tribute. You think you can waltz right into my throne room like you own the fucking place, make demands of me? Try to pry me from my beautiful money?

[[Lord Baron, Sir-- please, they do not speak for myself, I have not yet had the chance--]]

Yes I realize that, you little goddamn worm. Which is why you're not dead yet. And don't act like a pompous douchebag. You're a dirt eating animal trained to speak. You don't get to pretend to be sophisticated.

I'm screwing with you. I'm not even mad. Gonna still need my tribute, though. Then we can talk about what you can do to earn my cash. And hell. Maybe I'll answer a question or two, because I'm that much of a nice fucking guy.

It's too bad you don't have anyone good and dickable in your group. Save my bitch, but she's already mine, isn't she? I can always use more fresh meat. Something that'll still scream when I bite it. But I'm sure you have something else you could offer. I'm open to suggestion. I love a surprise. You're just lucky I'm your patron, and not the metal cunt. You'd be dead already.

Hrm.
Well there are a few things we can offer...I like the thought of offering you, almighty Baron, some of our victims from this upcoming heist...V-2, perhaps, could serve as collateral, something you get if we fail to deliver anything, if yoy in your graciousness would accept such terms?
Beyond that...I'm afraid most of what we have to offer we will need to make this heist work, though I can't say that doesn't mean they are not on the table to begin with...

That's the great part about being a summoned extra dimensional entity. We can cut through all the crap because we don't have to worry about our safety.

Honestly did not take you for the type that wanted groveling and such. The tribute I can understand but the rest of it just gets old after awhile.

So a tribute eh? V-2 go bake him a cake.

Man being a disembodied voice sucks sometimes. All we can offer is promises or stuff we can convince our minions/team to do.

Oh hey how about V-2? You seemed to be entertained by him. How about we train him in the ways of your priesthood or something? Get him to join the Baron religion/cult?

>>630949
Well our resources are very limited right now... Would creating chaos in your name be a suitable tribute? Or does it have to be something we give you directly? These two are not essential to our bank robbery plan, so they will be available as a form of tribute, but we kindof want them back afterwards, at least mostly unharmed.

Spread chaos in his name? That's just what he would expect us to say.

Lets promise to spread love and peace in his name instead. Then he can lure in hippy girls who were drawn into the love and peace message.

I submit this as tribute:

https://youtu.be/QrGrOK8oZG8

Also, wow, you are incredibly handsome and pleasing in every possible way! What a wonderful being you are! I'm so glad to have you as one of the gods.

Victor 2015/03/27(Fri)09:56 No. 631253 ID: 0a1420
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Four cooks is not too many cooks. I have more than a hundred. Fuck you and your stupid tribute, you insolent little shit.

But I do like the thought of another servant. And this one's a different flavor of magic from the blood bitch, I can feel it. With a little breaking and twisting he'd be a perfect little esoteric. That always was my favorite kind. You can have him back in a few months, when I'm done with him. You'd be his first assignment.

[[Ah- oh- Lord Baron please - put me down, with greatest respect I do not want--]]

But, thing is, I'm feeling the same kind of magic off the worm. And he is the original. Maybe I should take him instead, huh? Wouldn't want you dumping your sloppy seconds on me. And I only want one of them. You got me thinking of collecting the whole set, and I don't need doubles.

[[Ss- Sir, I do not use magic as the other races do, I am fundamentally different, you could not--]]

Sure I could, fuckface. I can do anything I fucking want.

How do you appease a schizo?! He goes from Bi-polar to multiple-personality to unstable maniac!!!

If you can find a pattern in his madness and appease him in a combo, that MIGHT work. Or it might just make his next state even more angry.

Try offering him a show!

I wouldn't call V-2 sloppy seconds. He's more unique than the original! Hell, he managed to use controlled magic. Victor can't do that. You may even be able to replace his body with something cooler, less likely to rot. Plus, I mean, he's pretty weird.

On the other hand, Victor is a better example of what an Annelid should be. If you're only interested in his fundamental difference from other races, Victor is a better choice. Also he's honestly less useful to us. He doesn't have hands anymore and his magic isn't reliable for anything except killing people. Well, maybe if we repeatedly enchanted items until we got a useful effect, but we'd need a lot of spare material to do that, which we don't have.

HOWEVER, if neither of them agree to the deal, I really don't want to force them into it. We'll have to figure out some other form of tribute in that case. I'd ask you to treat them nicely to help persuade one of them to agree, but uh, you have no reason to keep that promise.

Yeah I think there were only 4 actual cooks in that video. And probably less after the beard guy killed everyone.

Victor I know you have a bit more primal magic than everyone else but I am sure he could figure it out. Also I do apologize in advance if he hauls you off and molests you. Not really anything we can do about it.

Well which one you want is up to you really. If I was going to pick a new servant I would go with V-2. The original has been out in the world for years now and already has all sorts of preconceived notions regarding things.

But V-2 is a day old. Eager to learn everything and already accidentally breaking things with the best of them. You can mold him into whatever you want and it will be like raising a baby with built in flamethrowers.

It occurs to me that that video's jokes relied a lot on cultural stuff. Like, the whole idea of an intro lasting too long might not translate to this world. We don't even know if sitcoms exist here, much less if they follow the same tropes ours do.

How about a video like this instead, Lord Baron? It transcends cultural boundaries, I'd say.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FavUpD_IjVY
If you don't like that, what kind of stuff do you like? "Chaos" can mean a bunch of different things really...

*sighes* That, I suppose, is our quandry. We have, quite frankly, very little to offer...
So. Victor&V-2. They can be yours, in lieu of the fact that they are in your hands right now.
That, leaves us with...Nothing we can actually spare.
HOWEVER! I think we do work best with a degree of crunch...Perhaps, in your mercy you could be willing to grant us a measure of time before coming to you again, at which point, we can make a hopefully more appealing offer...And if we fail to applease you...I'd liek to think we could negotiate, but push come to shove, I suppose you could take your pick of what we have, period.

Victor 2015/03/30(Mon)14:38 No. 631798 ID: 0a1420
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Cows are more of a human thing. They don't live long underground. But I do like that more.

Not that it matters. We're coming to a more meaningful agreement, aren't we? Cartoons aren't fucking real. And I don't need a show from these two. I have performers and actors and whores and belly dancers and circus freaks dripping from every pore on my body. I've seen everything and more.

So I will take something I can wrap my hands around and play with. One of a kind trumps one of a species. And the zombie is fresh and malleable. He's not struggling at all. The worm's already whining and groaning. You can keep the it. I don't want it.

I will allow you to take the money on loan, with the promise of a better offer for me. You will need to bring me another tribute when you come back, of course. And if you don't come back, well... you'll owe me a favor. I have a good one planned already. You'll fucking love it. But broke as you are, you can still give down payment. You will give me some of the hostage meat from your robbery. Pick out the good ones, don't waste my fucking time.

I did promise I would answer some questions. Let it be known I am sometimes a man of my word. Go.

>>631798
Welp, good luck V-2. I hope you come out ahead from this arrangement. (heh, get it)

Okay, how long does that memetic invisibility spell last? Any limitations aside from goblins seeing through it?

Why are Vicki's eyes bleeding and turning colors? Is there any reliable way to trigger her massive power boost? If I had to guess, it seems to happen when she's agitated.

Where did Vicki's book originally come from? You know, the 7 easy steps one. We saw a vision earlier of you using it during your ascension to godhood. Is it some sort of ancient mysterious artifact of unknown origin, responsible for a sizable portion of the current pantheon?

Do you think our bank robbery plan is gonna work? Any advice on making it cooler or more lucrative? I'm not asking for spoilers here, I just wanna know if there's something we're forgetting.

What sort of tribute do the other gods like?

Why green?

Victor 2015/04/03(Fri)10:35 No. 632762 ID: 0a1420
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Is that all? You're not capitalizing on what you have. Why it's almost insulting... I will let it slide. But my patience is being tested with your group, isn't it.

V-2 will become visible when he decides to be. He will learn how to use his magic correctly. I don't have any use for a servant who cannot perform.

Blue is the color of the queen of dreams.

I don't do self help books. I have no idea what the fuck you're on about.

The metal bitch loves her filthy goblin gold more then I do. I don't know or care what the other small timers want.

I like green. It's my color. The fuck is wrong with green?

(Hang on, her eyes flashed blue back when she almost learned that whisper spell. The queen of dreams is responsible... I wonder if she's trying to help, or if she's fucking with us.)

>>632762
I... expected others to chime in with more questions, actually. Seems quiet in here.

Okay uh, how can we get Vicki to learn more magic from the book?
What are you going to do to V-2 exactly?
Where is Dreamstealer? How do we meet him? We heard he doesn't accept visitors, but if we're never going to get AAE's gift then we'll HAVE to meet Dreamstealer eventually to get his.
What's your favorite hedonistic thing to do?
What's your favorite magic?
What's the dumbest bitchfight you've seen between gods? What other gods hate eachother?
What recommendations do you have for Aspects that Vicki might choose? I kindof thought that was something she didn't pick willingly, and was determined more by her lifestyle and mental state, but I guess I was wrong. As I understand it we have to convince the other gods that the aspect will be useful in the pantheon. What about Rebirth? Fate?
Do you know what Firebeard is researching? Is it cool?

>>632762
So what did you look like before all the magic stuff?

You have given me an idea, though: We need to get home base fixed up and start renting out rooms.
Who wouldn't want to stay in a spooky mansion with a bunch of loonies and a goddess wannabe? Crazy people, that's who.

Okay I'm kinda curious, Is having a tentacle for an arm useful? I mean, It lack the efficient graspers of a standard humanoid arm...but at the same time it has reach...Actually now that I think of it, he's a god, he could probably just make it grow fingers if he wanted to grab something. Ignore me.

>>632984
Gah Just now it a question came to me, Have any reccomendations on what Our beloved Panic-prone protagonist should choose as her domain should she survive to ascend to godhood?

Victor 2015/04/06(Mon)09:00 No. 633140 ID: 0a1420
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What did I look like before all the magic stuff? What kind of a dumb fucking idiot question is that? Who the fuck cares what I used to look like? Who the fuck cares about who I was before I was a god? That shit don't matter, come on.

Victor 2015/04/06(Mon)09:01 No. 633142 ID: 0a1420
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What matters is what we look like now! Focus on today, right?

Uh huh! So, uhm. Questions! Let's see.

Vicki will figure more stuff out as she gets better at magic. She's gotta work that muscle a little. Practice, practice, practice! As for V-2 here, well, we're gonna teach him the trade until he's ready to serve. Then he'll be ours until he dies!

Dreamstealer's hiding away in an asylum, like the mad bastard he is. Ugh. We never liked asylums. Locking away the most interesting people in society to protect a few dull minded retards?... Whatever. We like to do whatever the hell is fun! Fucking is nice and all, and drugs are cool, but like we taught our girl, there's nothing like the rush of power! Pushing the limits, breaking boundaries, making reality your slut... but the drugs and fucking and stuff are totally cool too!

We like our own brand of magic! Baroness style! We don't really do the schools that the mortals have to deal with. We can do whatever the hell we want! And bitchfests aren't very dumb to the poor dumb mortals who get caught in the crossfire, are they? I think every bitchfest is awesome. Peace and love is for losers!

Vicki's a big ol' failure, so maybe she should be the goddess of that, huh? Awesome job security there! Nobody wants to be the god of failure! But she's interesting 'cause she's nothing. She's like a little kid! Kids have a whole world of possibilities ahead 'cause they can't do anything yet! So go nuts! Do whatever!

Firebeard's trying to invent the new steam engine, the new computer- he's making something big, something that's gonna put dwarves back on the map! We totally applaud him for that. Fuck the goblins! Stupid jerks!

And we use tentacles because, well, why the hell not? Tentacles are awesome! They're squirmy and slimy and totally unpredictable. We don't need to use them. We want to!

Now give us more! Come on, we still got some time to burn! Victor, you got anything, little guy?

[[I- ah- I cannot think of anything... miss. It is... difficult to think clearly in your presence. You are a very imposing... woman.]]

Well thank you! But you can go fuck yourself! What about you all out there, huh? C'mon, give us some more!

In the now then, Why is queen robo-bitch as she is anyways, what sort of stick do you need to become that lame and orderly? And speaking of which, what could we do to make sure she can stuff it in the future should she try something again.

Also mad props for the swirling shapeshift, god of chaos and all but it's nice to see some actual chaotic self.

>>633142
What, in your opinion(s?) is the most effective way to wipe out an entire city?
Can you make our pal Victor here fake arms?
...Made of FLESH? Or, y'no, magic fabric, if he's a spoilsport? Not that I'm asking you to actually make them.

…Do you even care about the quality of these questions?

>>633142
So what's the best way we can piss off iron bitch without her killing us?
I'm feelin' why you hate her, and I want to capitalize on that later.

Also, what's the deal with the book? Where'd that shit crop up from? Been curious about that for a while.

How big is your flesh table?

Since websites are apparently ok I was searching for that one 0 dimensional math website that turns anyone who reads it slowly mad. Didn’t find it, but apparently I have a bookmark for something appropriate for the god of failures: https://imgur.com/gallery/Vm05z

Other than that, maybe a last question. Have you ever really subverted one of the bitch’s designs into delightful chaos? I’d imagine the shift from rigid formality to absolute chaos to be positively orgasmic for two such as you.

What you looked like before is a relevant question because it gives us greater insight into how our own patron might change, as well as what godhood even means.

Victor 2015/04/13(Mon)11:32 No. 634169 ID: 0a1420
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So, do we care about the quality of the questions?

Hm...- not even a little tiny bit! Keep wasting time! That's perfect!

The metal bitch has a big goddamn stick up her ass 'cause she's a fucking goblin! The whole fucking race is like that! Keep an eye on your little green backstabber, by the way. She got kicked out of her own country, didn't she? I mean, I love a good outcast, but not when they're gonna fuck my projects over.

Steering right into more pleasant topics- we've fucked over the metal bitches plans so many times! It's so easy to destroy order, and so fucking hard to build it up again! We love it! But our best ever was definitely when we flung a plague ridden corpse into her perfect little model sterile city... had all the aristocrats and politicians and scientists eating each other in a week, on national television and the internet, streamed live to the whole wide world-- it was magical! And they couldn't even get out because of all the defences she set up! But we can't tell you how to fuck up her plans any more- you gotta figure that out for yourselves. Creativity is what we're all about!

Our flesh table? There's an odd question! We haven't used that in ages. It's tiny. And boring. We outgrew it years and years ago. But I guess it left an impression on our other servant, huh? Well, it probably would! We stuffed it in her room and all. We can still hear it screaming when we pass on by.

And if you really have to know, we used to be a shining slab of manly dwarvenhood. Pretty much the opposite of that tiny toothpick you've got slinging fireballs. Just imagine everything he's not- that was us, alright? But maybe you should see the other gods before worrying about what Vicki will turn into, huh?

Victor 2015/04/13(Mon)11:32 No. 634170 ID: 0a1420
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So now we're onto the good part!

The part we both love.

[[What-- guh -- FFNGNNN HGNNNGNNN]]

We got an idea, right? We could give wormy a new pair of arms... it'd be stupid easy, too! But why don't we let him do that himself?

We think his magic is close enough to ours that he might benefit from a teensy bit of our genius! We know how to use what we've got, don't we?

[[UGHHGNNN FFHGHGNNG HHRURHNNGN!!]]

And don't even worry about payment for this one, we've got an awesome idea in mind. You'll see!

But we're not giving him our gift forever. He's got a few hours, right up until the end of tonight. So use it while you can! We want to see what he does with it!

Victor 2015/04/13(Mon)11:33 No. 634171 ID: 0a1420
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[[Ughh... good.. lord, that-..]]

Alright wormy! Times up! In through the door! Go on!

Go on, boy! Go go go!

[[I am... in very significant pain..]]

Shh! Shh! Good wormies go through the door, go on!

Now go! Hurry up! Hurry up!

Victor 2015/04/13(Mon)11:33 No. 634172 ID: 0a1420
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[[Wha- who- do I... know these people?]]

>>634172
What? WE WERE SUPPOSED TO ROB A BANK NOT THESE GUYS Let loose with your new powers. Ice them. Kill the mage first.

Also what are those ingots made out of?

it's the assholes that knocked you out and tied you up, twice! BLAST EM!

THESE GUYS DIE HORRIBLY!
OOH! Do the V-2 magic again! I want to do magic science to it!
As for the rest? Hrrm...
I want to replicate that one spell in the forest that made spheres in it. And to keep the sphere for later examination, that sounds like fun as well.
Beyond that? CUT LOSE, AND LET SLIP THE BARON'S MADNESS!

Rob the robbers, become super robber.

Ohhhhh boy. I wonder what kind of wonderful, awful trouble killing these people will cause. I wonder if they're actually our people, magicked to look different. Ah well. Kill 'em, fuck it.

Victor 2015/04/17(Fri)10:45 No. 634963 ID: 0a1420
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[[The pain has abated slightly. I am... in control. They did not explode into bees, or turn inside out, or burst into flame or anything of the sort. I did what I wanted to do. It feels good. It was almost too easy.]]

[[Actually... now that I stop to think of it... it was too easy. It is very likely that Baron is toying with me, isn't it..?]]

[[...Sssshiiiiiit.]]

[[..Vicki? Victoria?]]

>>634963
Vicky's not there, bro. The baron just tossed you in a safe…
Loot it.

Well looks like he threw you into the thick of things. He said you have his gift until the end of the night so might as well make use of it.

The gift might be something that stabilizes your power. That or he is siphoning off the extra chaos in your magic and using it elsewhere.

Anyways you are in a vault somewhere and it looks like they got in without using the main door. So you will want to check around and see how they planned on leaving.

Once you figure out a escape plan look over what they were stealing. Looks like a bunch of purple bars and safety deposit boxes. We either want to have you cart off as much as you can or open a portal and get your team in here to clean the place out.

>>634975
what are you talking about? the vault door is behind vector and its wide fucking open. make a floating disk of magic and pile as many bars as you can.

Waaait a second. First off-what ARE these purple bar things? Can we do some scanning magic on them to figure out what they are?
Then? It depends on how easily we can sell em off/convert to money to pay lawyers. Oh, prolly should do something or another to those corpses and save em for the Baron. Sure, there's the bank robbery, buuuut I dunno how much we'll get from that...Or how much he will want.
I think that body-control spell Ava mentioned will work fine for that purpose, then we can do some sort of spell to send them into hibernation if there's such a thing?
And that, I suppose is about as much as I can think of to do...For now.

>>634963
Try a scrying spell, now that you have control. Sense the location of Vicki and the others. I really don't think the Baron would send you right in the middle of your allies while they were disguised as enemies. He's trying to help us, remember? Also nobody had the capability for such convincing disguises... and disguises weren't part of the plan. Hell, Vicki and Firebeard were supposed to be a distraction.

Can you teleport stuff? You could teleport all the loot out. Well, there are probably teleport wards here. The Baron could overpower them but you might not be able to.

See if V-3 was a successful clone, or if the mostly-destroyed body you put him in fucked up the process. I wish you hadn't even tried, I mean if it worked you basically doomed yourself to being stuck in HALF of a corpse this time. Also uh, we still don't know any way to stabilize clones you've made in this way. They're doomed to rot. Unless you can straight up make a stable body for them with the controlled wild magic you have now?

After figuring out what's really going on, start shoving more loot in the bags these thieves brought. Do it as fast as possible. Then we can run off with the loot. Maybe you can disguise yourself as one of the thieves while doing so?

>>634988
except we know the orb should be possble transference. just crush a different skull and plop it on there.

Victor 2015/04/20(Mon)11:57 No. 635485 ID: 0a1420
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[[I am a very... distinctive figure, and I have no idea how competent these others were in preventing the authority's response and presence. For all I know, the room outside is swarmed with police. I believe acquiring a fitting disguise would be the best first move.]]

[[Unfortunately the only school of magic which deals directly with the body, which could be used to copy their appearance, is blood magic. Blood magic is fundamentally different from other types of magic- it is based in introverted ritual that absorbs magic rather then channelling and projecting it outward and- it doesn't matter, my point is that I do not have the faculties to do it. But I believe I have a another solution.]]

Victor 2015/04/20(Mon)11:58 No. 635487 ID: 0a1420
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[[This is rather cramped and uncomfortable. Fortunately I received more room to stretch out with after his stomach burst. I suppose I shouldn't complain. The corpse will also act as a meat shield for me. On my own, I am rather fragile.]]

[[I wish I could perform more of what you ask- but teleportation, (while I feel it would be within my grasp), would likely be a very poor choice to attempt. Any bank worth their money will have stringent security measures put in place- possibly violent measures- designed to prevent exactly such a thing. And I do not know of any 'scrying' spells which would identify material- they may well exist, but I do not even know where to begin with attempting it. However, I am sure one of our party will know what it is, and what we can do with it. Firebeard is a dwarf, material is supposed to be their specialty. And Seshe is a rather smart woman as well.]]

[[And as I mentioned, blood magic is beyond my abilities- even with fingers, I do not know how to draw the runes correctly. There is likely more then mere cutting involved. Any suggestions involving preserving or animating the bodies with it is beyond me.]]

[[But physical magic that does not deal directly with the body, I can certainly manage that. Manifesting a physical platform is simplicity defined. And I feel I could transfer "V-3" to another body. He does seem to be struggling in the one he is in. The frozen girl, perhaps?]]

yeah, slice her head off cleanly, try to leave the brain stem intact. if the heart and lungs stay working then it should last much longer.

>>635487
Oh god he was still alive when you did that. I'm hoping he isn't anymore! I don't suppose you could put him out of his misery if he's still got a pulse?

Transfer V-3 to the girl, yes. See if we can refine the cloning procedure. SCIENCE! MAGIC SCIENCE!

Can you make a little golem out of raw materials present, to help with carrying stuff? Or fighting? Probably gonna have to do more fighting. V-3 will need some form of weapon as well. Perhaps you could enchant something to make an explosive? Sack of magical grenades seems like a good weapon.

Victor 2015/04/27(Mon)05:18 No. 636617 ID: 0a1420
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[[He seemed to be dead when I first entered him.]]

[[...I gave his heart a squeeze. I do not fully understand elven anatomy but that ought to ensure he's fully deceased. In any case. I can most likely make a golem of some variety, but let us deal with the problem of V-3 and his body first. He seems to be struggling in the one he has now, and I am uncomfortable with the thought of a clone of myself confined into a great deal of pain.]]

[[Unfortunately I am unsure I would be gentle or precise enough to thaw the body without causing significant damage. Firebeard would likely do a better job then I, even with the knowledge I possess. It is his specialty. And her frozen nerves would surely dull any pain. I believe I should be able to slice cleanly through the ice, as a temporary solution. V-3 will have to tolerate a less ideal situation being stuck in a fully immobile body, for the time being. At least until we are back at home base.]]

Victor 2015/04/27(Mon)05:21 No. 636620 ID: 0a1420
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Y- yyou kk-kk-KILLED them-! And y-you're w-wuh-WEARING HII-II-IIIM!!

[[Oh she is much stronger then I am and she is pulling at the wrong end I cannot do much to resist with magic when my head is buried inside of him]]

F-FFUCK THE DEEAL!! You KILLED H-HIM! YOU P-PIECE OF SHIT WORM I'LL K-KILL YOU!!!

[[Her hands are very cold please help]]

headbutt

Think you can get your head out of there and then blow her away/blast her head off for V-3 before she does something nasty to you?

Enchant yourself so that anyone touching you is paralyzed. Or make yourself stronger so you are stronger than her. Then ask her what the "deal" was.

"Deal?"

Victor 2015/05/01(Fri)06:31 No. 637262 ID: 0a1420
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[[Headbutt!!]]

Victor 2015/05/01(Fri)06:32 No. 637263 ID: 0a1420
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[[Ah... I apologize for panicking. It is a holdover from my earlier, more primitive life- worms very much so do not like being forcibly pulled out of the ground. I likely could have enchanted something, if not myself, or done some type of offensive spell when I was fully extracted. However, simple as it was, I prefer this option vastly.]]

[[In any case...]]

[[What deal? For what purpose were you attempting to harm me before?]]

[[...]]

[[Yes, I did not think that would work, honestly. She seems to be in a certain mood--]]

Victor 2015/05/01(Fri)06:32 No. 637264 ID: 0a1420
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[[No- No! Wait! Do not attack me!!- We must still discuss--]]

You're still WEARING HIM! YOU FUCKING ANIMAL!!

I wonder if we have some more prospect of control over our magic...DO you think you could try a mood depressor so as to make her docile enough to answer a question? Because as it is, we are essentially a worm wearing a corpse and it takes some sort of fucked up mental fortitude to be able to ignore that anytime soon.

>>637264
Paralyze her, exit the body, then interrogate her.

launch one of those metal bars between the eyes.

Victor 2015/06/24(Wed)10:31 No. 650457 ID: 0a1420
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[[Mood depressor! Yes. I can most certainly do something like that.]]

Victor 2015/06/24(Wed)10:32 No. 650458 ID: 0a1420
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[[Whoops. Let us get that out of here.]]

Victor 2015/06/24(Wed)10:33 No. 650459 ID: 0a1420
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[[Now...]]

Maeon! Your tongue is ALL weird! My hand hurts! Where are we?

[[Ahh... yes, you see..]]

How are you doing that! I can hear you inside my HEAD! And your mouth isn't moving! Do those yellow things hurt?

[[...That turned out quite strong, didn't it? And perhaps I did not push her in the correct direction after all. Still, she does however still seem lucid enough to interrogate. Or I could instead simply decapitate her with ease, for V-3's use of her body. I am beginning to feel distress over V-3. He has stopped moving. I do not know whether he requires a functioning and unmolested body to survive, or if the broken body he has commandeered has stopped responding to him, or if he has merely passed out.]]

yes, let's finish this, if you need her closer just say you can't feel your leg and need some help.

Tell her that she got hit with something, your partner didn't make it. You don't know and you don't care. The job's a mess but the escape portal is literally two feet in front of you, so take everything that isn't tagged and stuff it into the portal. You both leave in thirty seconds, no questions asked.

Victor, estimate the current value of the purple bars and the cash.

Victor 2015/07/07(Tue)11:49 No. 653736 ID: 0a1420
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[[Perhaps if V-3 has passed already, then there is little we can do for him. And if he has not passed yet then he can surely last a short while longer. As death is generally a one way street and not easily reversible, for now I will drag the female along and make use of her. We can always re-purpose her body later.]]

[[We are currently robbing a bank. You were hit on the head and are consequently disoriented. We need to put all of what we can find in the shell with all due haste and move forward.]]

I- uh- okay...!

[[I would estimate the current worth of everything here to be "valuable". I have no idea what precisely this metal is. We will have to wait until we can find a proper appraiser- that is to say, Firebeard or Seshe- then we can learn of its true value.]]

Victor 2015/07/07(Tue)11:53 No. 653738 ID: 0a1420
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[[Yes, see? This is why I cannot give any estimation of worth. We are clearly in an elven bank, which apparently does not use the gold standard. However, if they feel the need to store it securely, then it must be valuable to them, correct? If it holds no value to humans, we can simply fence it back to the elves.]]

[[I am not particularly happy to see the state the three who came before me have left this place in. Any semblance of subtlety has clearly been dragged from the premises and beaten to death with a socket wrench.]]

[[In any case, we are now prepared to leave. The shell has been filled with valuables in the form of the mysterious ingots as well as assorted jewellery and knickknacks, as well as V-3's severed head, in the hopes of restoring it to functionality later on. We do not have an exit portal, and I cannot form one inside the bank. Should I attempt to step outside and immediately create one? There is not any law enforcement visible directly through the window to the street, but that does not mean they aren't there and simply hiding toward the side. Elven law enforcement may be less directly confrontational and more prone to ambush. Or there may be nothing there at all.]]

uhh, there's an old man behind you.

>>653762
Use the old man as a hostage to scan outside.

Check the corpses. Some of the elves might still be alive.

I imagine with your current super-magic you could erect some fortifications outside so that you could place a portal unmolested.

Snake your body through several of the corpses and then run screaming out the door while appearing to be a horrible corpse golem. Just waving bloody limbs everywhere as you go.

Anyone watching will be so startled that you will be able to make a portal while they are confused.

>>653773
Won't that just get Victor shot?

Victor 2015/07/10(Fri)10:17 No. 654682 ID: 0a1420
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[[Due to the nature of my magic, it would be difficult to set up fortifications outside without first opening the door, at which point the ambush might already be sprung. My magic is less subtle and more raw then a normal magician's- as I have mentioned, it is similar to a hose. I can control what comes out, but I cannot make the fountain spontaneously appear on the other side of the glass. I am the source, it must be connected through me.]]

[[For that reason I feel the "meat golem" idea has some weight to it- although I do not need to wear it myself, I could simply control it through telekinesis as a distraction. Or I could use the bodies as a massed shield and forego the bipedal form entirely.]]

[[Female! I require you to check the life signs of the corpses. Some may still be alive.]]

Uh- wh, why, Maeon?

[[Because I requested for you to do so.]]

...Uh, okay..!

[[I doubt any still live. But we shall see.]]

Victor 2015/07/10(Fri)10:20 No. 654686 ID: 0a1420
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[[That leaves one other possibility to quickly explore, before we make our debut to the streets of the elven city.]]

[[Old man, I am commandeering your services. Cooperate peacefully with us and we will have no need to harm you.]]





[[I am speaking to you old man, kindly respond to me.]]

[[I attempted to pull his cane away, but I cannot seem to work my magic on his person. Also... now that I try, I cannot read his mind, either. In fact, I do not feel a mind there at all. But he is clearly watching me.]]

>>654686
...a magic null? Or is that a god in disguise? Or is it an illusion, part of the bank? He's got red eyes.

Maybe you could try touching him?

touch him with the metal ball in the hand.

Let's not poke the obvious bad thing to poke :v
seriously, leave the old man be. He's not really bothering us and is irrelevant to us until he IS bothering us.

Victor 2015/08/31(Mon)16:40 No. 666057 ID: 0a1420
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Probably it is better to leave well enough alone. And in any case, the man is beginning to distress me greatly. I do not relish the thought of touching him. Or engaging him further.

[[Please strip the corpses and gather them. Perhaps search for more, if there are any avaliable. I have a plan that requires their use.]]

... Alright, Maeon.

Victor 2015/08/31(Mon)16:40 No. 666058 ID: 0a1420
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[[Hm. Fusing together a flesh golem and puppeting it is proving more difficult then I thought. Oh well. Fortunately there are always alternatives to any given situation.]]

Victor 2015/08/31(Mon)16:40 No. 666059 ID: 0a1420
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Ui yi itoth-- eea??!

Victor 2015/08/31(Mon)16:41 No. 666060 ID: 0a1420
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Thian oias moiy eiaha idas! Sotha! Sotha!

Ji gian dialas!

Victor 2015/08/31(Mon)16:41 No. 666061 ID: 0a1420
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[[Well, this is posing a problem. I attempted to create a portal as the easiest and most logical way of leaving this place. But we appear to be in the moving Ent city, which means the portal will not stay in place. Very troublesome.]]

Victor 2015/08/31(Mon)16:41 No. 666062 ID: 0a1420
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[[I need another means of escape. I can reliably create a shield around myself simply enough with the knowledge that Lord Baron has granted me, however I require a clear line-of-sight to perform magic, so doing so would render me powerless to perform any other type of magic, including keeping the corpse ball together.]]

[[There should be a leyline located somewhere deeper in the city, but I would need a way to safely traverse the city to reach it, and if I am busy shielding myself and unable to perform other magic I could be easily blockaded and trapped. I could also perhaps try to exit through the window, although that would leave me stranded in the woods, no better then where I was only yesterday.]]

[[Those boxes appear to have wheels on them. I would guess that those boxes are how they got here, however I have no personal understanding of what exactly it is or how it functions.]]

>>666062
Can't you just launch yourself into the portal? Or fly into it?

how high of a fall can you handle? just roll off the edge and land on the actual ground.