>>499698
Dude. What the hell is that to your right? Creepy graffiti? Or a fucking monster?

Archivemod 2013/03/17(Sun)15:10 No. 500679 ID: b53faa
File 136355825804.png - (50.75KB , 800x600 , grumblingrumbling.png )

>>499768
It was just some graffiti. Horrific, mind-searingly TERRIBLE graffiti, but still just graffiti.
>>499756
>>499703
Yeah yeah, designated driver, yadda yadda. Augh, this fucking shit-faced dipshit is gonna be the end of me, I swear to god.

So, where should I take her?
My apartment is kinda far away, and I sorta don't want people in this part of town to see me walking around with an unconscious lush slumped over my silicon shoulders here.
I can probably make it there, but it would be a lot of trouble and would more than likely be a horrid experience.
Not that the ALTERNATIVE is any better, of course.
The ALTERNATIVE, of course, is to simply dump her ass into my shitty ass ford pinto and hope to god it doesn't explode when I try to start the fucker.
There's a REASON I only use that thing when I am late.

>>500679

So dump her in the Pinto and lock the doors, and don't drive it? Nobody would bother trying to gank a terrible car like that so she should be safe.

>>500682
Be sure to crack the windows.

Sam Archivemod 2013/03/21(Thu)01:58 No. 501508 ID: b53faa
File 136385628083.png - (6.05KB , 268x281 , updort.png )

>>500687
Yeah yeah, I know. I've done this more than-
>>500682
Oh fuck me sideways with a rusty godsdamned pitchfork-
WHY WOULD THEY STEAL MY SHITTY LEMON OF A CAR?!
AAAAAAAAUGH
Alright, voices. Time to shine. What do I do NOW?
I can either leave sleeping dickshit here andtry and track down my scrap heap of a car, try to carry her home.
If you guys have any better ideas feel free to pipe up because holy SHIT am I sick of this bullshit.

Hmm. Abandon friend to look for piece of shit car, or help friend and leave piece of shit car to explode and kill the jackasses dumb enough to steal it?

This one is kind of obvious. Help your friend home, and let Darwinian selection take its course.

Is that a cassette tape in the street?

Put her into nearest recycle bin/dumpster, either that or dump her at a nearby building.

It lost a wheel as they drove away? Man.

Looks like there is some SWEET LOOT besides the wheel though. Pick up and inspect everything!

>>501508
That oil leak would lead us right to them. Question is what would you do if you found them?

Sam Archivemod 2013/03/22(Fri)13:36 No. 501772 ID: b53faa
File 136398456135.png - (46.33KB , 800x600 , card.png )

>>501533
No, it's a-
Oh godammit.

Aggressive charity, huh?

Oh well, one less death trap in the world. Moving on.

Sam Archivemod 2013/03/22(Fri)14:38 No. 501791 ID: b53faa
File 136398831802.png - (44.72KB , 800x600 , Untitled.png )

>>501781
HARDLY. These douchenozzles are a well known ring of thieves. The only reason they actually GIVE TO ORPHANS is as a tax dodge.
Fucking bullshit, That's what it is.

Suggestion 2013/03/22(Fri)14:45 No. 501792 ID: 78c6ea
File 136398870362.jpg - (86.12KB , 466x452 , onewheeleddevice.jpg )

you have one wheel left. You know what to do.

>>501791
Still, who cares? The car who blow them up instead of putting you or your friends at risk. I count that as a win.

Plus, you can count getting rid of the as a charitable donation in your taxes. :V

Let's get drunkie home, already.

yeah you tax return is gonna look sweet.

anyway, drag her into the store you are working for?

archivemod 2013/05/23(Thu)10:47 No. 512165 ID: b53faa
File 136933124833.png - (18.94KB , 800x600 , CRACK.png )

"Oh who the dicking crackmother are you-
You are now UNCONSCIOUS! congrats on that, you incompetent shithorde.

archivemod 2013/05/23(Thu)10:49 No. 512166 ID: b53faa
File 136933138580.png - (3.67KB , 800x600 , 2.png )

Oh dear lord, what is that thing covering him?!
No idea sir! There is no way to get it off him that we have found! SIR!
I really wish you'd stop that already. Still, we can worek with this. Get him to the orientation chamber, we should be able to get him up to speed soon enough.

archivemod 2013/05/23(Thu)10:52 No. 512167 ID: b53faa
File 136933154522.png - (80.56KB , 800x600 , the prodigal son returns.png )

You successfully navigated your way back into conciousness! (Next time don't take three fucking months though, god damn.)
Oh good lord, where in the unceasingly shitty planet of fucktron nine have I wound up this time?

Quickly, pound your dicksuit against the glass to break it and escape!

No, seriously, just get up and look around. What else is in this cell besides the viewport? Is Sandra here? Can you see anything through/in that monitor or window over on the wall?

Get up, look around. Is there a door?

WHY IS EVERYTHING SO ORANGE

archivemod 2013/05/31(Fri)16:30 No. 513666 ID: ea4b0b
File 137004305911.png - (91.84KB , 800x600 , update.png )

You stand up, only for the room to go COMPLETELY batshit on you. The only stable feature of this shithole appears to be a tv screen set into midair.
>What do?

hit the button to find out wtf

archivemod 2013/05/31(Fri)16:46 No. 513669 ID: ea4b0b
File 137004397053.png - (37.60KB , 800x600 , oh god whut.png )

>>513667
you do so, and as the rather long message scrolls down the screen it starts to dawn on you that you need to get the shit out of here as fast as possible.

>>513669
Feel around the edges of the room to find a door. Failing that, think of something you've always wanted to do on television, and do it.

Enough of this shit. Penis-headbutt the computer screen till it shatters and the room stops doing its holodeck bullshit.

archivemod 2013/05/31(Fri)19:17 No. 513690 ID: ea4b0b
File 137005303318.png - (94.88KB , 800x600 , rolled.png )

>>513673
>rolled the dice: 19
YOU COMPLETELY WRECK THAT SCREEN'S SHIT.

>>513690
Did you just change your suit into a fist?

okay now walk around carefully, figure out what the fuck is going on.

Unless your suit shifted for fisting, it looks as if you opted to punch glass rather than smash it with your dick. I must say, were are disappointed with you.

So... did that wreck the holodeck? Or is there a hole where the screen was you can escape through? Or if not, can you keep pulling wires out of the wall until everything breaks?

archivemod 2013/05/31(Fri)20:28 No. 513704 ID: ea4b0b
File 137005732967.png - (1.09MB , 1632x1224 , Clenched_human_fist.png )

>>513696
>>513702
Ace sleuthing there, sherlock.
And the room seems to be completely and utterly featureless. As far as I can tell I am sitting in a giant vertical tube with the world's ugliest wallpaper.

>>513704
I thought you said you couldn't do that.

Well, nowhere to go but up. See if you can form some claws or some shit like that with your suit to scale the wall.

Hey, it shifted based off what you wanted to do! It responded! That's progress.

So make like a rocket-ship sex toy and rocket on out of here.

archivemod 2013/05/31(Fri)21:15 No. 513707 ID: ea4b0b
File 137006010716.png - (71.05KB , 800x600 , animu.png )

wait.
Wait hang on, that isnt in the toy lineup-
OHMYGOD
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD IT HAPPENED!!!

>>513707
YOU'VE CHEATED THE SYSTEM.

THE SUIT IS JAILBROKE.

Now you need to decide on a consistent design that isn't the latest model of horsecock.

Archivemod 2013/06/29(Sat)18:26 No. 520298 ID: ea4b0b
File 137255557490.png - (27.59KB , 800x600 , shit I suck.png )

>>513712
((OK y'all, it has been almost an entir month since my last updat and I still cannot think up a good design for a standard thing. So, in a stroke of both brilliance and utter laziness, I am leaving the design up to you! Now, there are a FEW LIMITATIONS to what is possible with the suit, such as the fact shrinking its siz makes the weight of the thing more dense. Sam is pretty ripped from living in this thing, but try to keep in mind he is only human. What that means is, if you guys try to form the mass of th thing into a backpack or something small like that he will be very easily unbalanced.
So, try to keep that in mind when designing it fo' my lazy-ass. Here is a base for him, to get y'all started. Once people have a decent design shaped up, I'll be able to continue the quest from there. Thanks in advance, yo.
If there are any questions, feel free to ask me.)

Also it changes back to a penis when you aren't paying attention.

>>520300
Actually, this is going to BE the default mode.
So instead of a penis, it is going to be whatever.

>>520301

Oh fffffine.

Since you were a little kid you wanted to wear a magic suit that looks like a uh...

Like a hamster!

An absurd muscle suit.

>>520301
Overlord Armor, like you promised to draw me but never did. You heretic.

>>520343
???
I might have forgotten about this, mind refreshing me in my /draw/ thread?

Hey guys, guess who dug up the dis thread for this shitstain of a quest? http://tgchan.org/kusaba/questdis/res/68705.html[/spoiler]

I vote a megaman-style armor looking thing.

Go with a normal suit of armor. Plate armor.

Go for a Sam spade style Fedora and trenchcoat combo.

I say we wear a pikachu costume.

Suggestion 2013/07/09(Tue)19:13 No. 523253 ID: 12c19f
File 137342240875.png - (14.79KB , 268x468 , Composite Armor Default.png )

How about this for some armor.

I have no clue what to do for the color scheme or decals.

Yes it's totally a marriage between Robocop and Judge Dread. Who are you to judge.

>>523253
I'm Judge Dredd without an 'a' and three 'd's. That's who I am.

>>523291
Not as far as my spellchecker is concerned.
Durr hurr.