Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/18(Tue)18:07 No. 479715 ID: db1ec9
File 135588282393.png - (91.33KB , 800x600 , BT02.png )

Please choose main character's RACE
>CORGI
>RACCOON
>FOX
>WOLF
SELECT?

Corgwyn

All day erry day!

Corgi is the one on the upper left, yes? Sure, we can go with that.

Skeletor

Skeletor

I'd normally pick fox, but that corgi is so much more adorable.

Skeletor

>>479715
There are obviously five photos on the table. Why only four options?

Let's go with corgi.

>>479749
The fifth is Skeletor

Corgi of course.

I misread that as BiteQuest and got all excited...
Corgi

Guys, we've already seen where the skeleton race non-selection leads us. :V

>>/questarch/427852

>>479757
SkeleTOR not skeleTON
Jeez

Suggestion 2012/12/18(Tue)21:56 No. 479771 ID: 774aa0
File 135589657187.jpg - (91.58KB , 476x508 , Skeletor.jpg )

Skeletor is the only real option.
Everything else is small time.

Skeletorgi

Yeah, skeleton. We're due to play a skeleton I think.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/19(Wed)15:40 No. 479901 ID: db1ec9
File 135596042329.png - (54.41KB , 800x600 , BT03.png )

>>479746
Secret Password accepted unlocked Bonus Boss that beats you up and makes you cry over controller.
> Received Key Item: Skeleton Key to Hell
>>479719
>>479721
>>479745
>>479749
>>479752
>>479755
>>479773
>CORGI has been selected.
The other photos flew off to somewhere else...
>Please select your class.
>Knight- Honor is your sword, valor is your shield.
>Wizard- I castz the spellz that makez the peoples fall downz.
>Templar- Bring salvation by ramming your faith imbued lance right up those heretics' colons.
>Please input name
>__________

>Fighter, Mage, Rouge Templar
Oh, hey, that's different. Let's go with different (instead of just rolling another mage. Again).

Templar.

Templar. We get a point-ed stick!

Templar, let's smite those heathens with extreme prejudice.

>>479901
I wonder if templar is like paladin, if that's the case trying to make it fall will be the best thing.

Templar

>Please input name

Keldor.

Templar.

As for a name, how about deMolay?

Class: Templar.
Name: Willow.

>>479918
sounds good

Templar. LeBrow.

>>479901
Templar!

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/19(Wed)21:01 No. 479955 ID: db1ec9
File 135597968129.png - (54.92KB , 800x600 , BT04.png )

>Naming Algorithm activated NameKero de Willow

>Class selected- Templar

>Choose Sub-class
>Saint-Pull Miracles out of your cute furry butt
>Crusader-In the name of the faith, KILL THE HERETIC!
>Guardian- You no touchie

...was that a unanimous class selection? Wow.

Of the subclasses, I'd have to say my first choice would be crusader. Holy smiting for the win. Miracles could be fun, but that's too close to the magic that can do anything approach we always chose.

Guardian, because taking damage ever is for schmucks.

Guardian!

>>479955
CRUSADER! Rargh!

Guardian, because fuck glass cannons.

A good offense is the best defense so crusader! We just gotta charge and smite everything so fast that they wont even have time to repent.

Guardian

>>479966
The best defense is being invulnerable to harm because you have massive armor plates protecting you.

Guardian.

Crusader

>>479968
Not to forget that we totally need to go after Skeletor at some point, I mean, we unblocked the key so we will end there at some point or the other.

Guardian: Defenders OP

Guardian.

Guardian. Pointy stock + shield = inevitable Corgi jouster.

>Corgi jouster
Going for guardian.

Guardian.

Crusader, because being nearly invulnerable is for pansies.

DUAL CLASS GUARDIAN-CRUSADER!

guardisader!

>>480023
Crusader, we'll need strength to kill Skeletor.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/20(Thu)20:20 No. 480091 ID: db1ec9
File 135606360651.png - (48.96KB , 800x600 , BT05.png )

>Selected GUARDIAN class
Character Status
Name: Kero de Willow
Class: Guardian Templar
HP: 26/26
MP: 12/12
Skills:
Blessed Mantle-Passive-Armor defense and abilities are doubled in value
Anointing Ward-3 SP-Increases defense of the target for 3 turns
Smite Heretic- 10 SP-Increased damage to enemies of your faith
>Is this acceptable?
>YES

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/20(Thu)20:21 No. 480092 ID: db1ec9
File 135606371359.png - (1.00MB , 800x600 , BT06.png )

>Location-Unknown
Ughh…

Oh well, at least we still got a smite attack, even if def bonuses are boring as all hell. We'll have to do something about having barely enough mp to use it though.

>Ughh…
Gruh?

swear vengeance upon Skeletor.

>>480092
Equip thine weapon and rifle it. It is now a drill. Drill into Hell and face Skeletor.

>>480095
That's not how a drill works.

>Ughh…
ugh? ugh is not the sound heroes makes, do you like the smell of adventure? of course you do, would you like to reap the fame from saving the weak from villianous and those deemed too heretical? of course you do!
SWANDIVE into the BEST adventure of your life!
So lady, should you keep ugh-ing in the floor? You tell me.

Have a quick fap to clear your head.

find something to yiff.

Ignore the crudity of flesh, charge forth to conquer evil!

Armor is damage reduction, right?

Armor is damage PREVENTION

Grab that shield it is the best thing. Until you get a better one, at least.
Charge forth to defend the defenseless!

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/21(Fri)17:48 No. 480200 ID: db1ec9
File 135614091663.png - (593.91KB , 800x600 , BT07.png )

Huh? Who in the Temple's name are you all?
>>480116 ugh? ugh is not the sound heroes makes, do you like the smell of adventure? of course you do, would you like to reap the fame from saving the weak from villianous and those deemed too heretical? of course you do!
SWANDIVE into the BEST adventure of your life! So lady, should you keep ugh-ing in the floor? You tell me.
Well of course but what else am I supposed to do when I'm out cold on the ground?!

>>480159 Ignore the crudity of flesh, charge forth to conquer evil!
Now you're talking, I fight evil it's what I do!

>>480094 swear vengeance upon Skeletor.
I don't know who he is or what he's done but he sounds evil enough. Watch out you bag of bones, there's a pointy stick in your future.

>>480142 find something to yiff.
A Templar swears off the wiles of women so no thanks!

>>480095 Equip thine weapon and rifle it. It is now a drill. Drill into Hell and face Skeletor.
What are you talking about? I'm equipping my lance right now. Don't know where this Skeletor person is, and Hell isn't underground you know. What now whoever you are?

Yeah, we're gonna have to break that vow of celibacy. Sorry kid.

Anyway, get up and pick a direction to walk. Do you know where you are?

A true gentleman walks west.

>>480201
Ignore him. Vows of celibacy are AWESOME. It's totally worth it for the incredible amount of RAW FRUSTRATION you can channel into your work.

Also, head west. A classy gent once told me that.

>A Templar swears off the wiles of women so no thanks!
So... dudes are okay, then?

>>480200
That tree is a heretic. Purge it.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/22(Sat)15:47 No. 480348 ID: db1ec9
File 135622004844.png - (648.25KB , 800x600 , BT08.png )

>>480214 That tree is a heretic. Purge it.
Which tree? I'm not going to waste my time smiting every tree in the forest you know.

>>480201 Do you know where you are?
Well unless you're blind this is a forest. Then again if you want to know where exactly this is Knockout Forest.

>>480203 A true gentleman walks west.
>>480211 Also, head west. A classy gent once told me that.
Well okay then, going west whoever you are.

>>480212 So... dudes are okay, then?
Ah... ... ... ... I... don't... know...

Why is it called knockout Forest? Is it because you were knocked out?

Well, what can you tell us about yourself? Where are you from, what do you do, how did you end up unconscious in the forest. That kind of thing. Well, the pieces you remember, at least.

>Ah... ... ... ... I... don't... know...
Loophole acquired!

>>480352
If you force this young man into a Cosmo-Letter, I will SUE YOU.

You asked who we were right?
We are extremely minor gods from an alternate universe who got bored and decided to chill in your brain for a bit. Cool? Cool.

Now let's head west and see if there are any especially heretical trees to purge.

>>480352
I dunno man, this is a templar we're dealing with here. Maybe you've found a loophole? Or maybe he'd just never even considered that men could also have wiles.

We are your new gods. If you worship us, then your Smite Heretic ability will work on literally EVERYTHING.

Plus, we have great benefits, from constant technical support to no dental benefits, combat training, or even afterlife guarantees!

>>480373
We DO offer dental benefits. But just ignore anything we say that doesn't apply to the immediate situation.

>>480380
No, no, listen to everything! It's not like we can possibly lead you into horrible horrible death!

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/22(Sat)18:41 No. 480389 ID: db1ec9
File 135623050962.png - (219.43KB , 800x600 , BT09.png )

>>480350 Why is it called knockout Forest? Is it because you were knocked out?
Knockout Forest randomly knocks out anybody who travels through it once until the next morning.

>>480366
You asked who we were right?
We are extremely minor gods from an alternate universe who got bored and decided to chill in your brain for a bit. Cool? Cool.Now let's head west and see if there are any especially heretical trees to purge.
Really? What are your names then? You guys actually sound a little like Tom. Anyway nobody thinks trees have the capacity to be heretics, except for the dwarves.

>>480352
Well, what can you tell us about yourself? Where are you from, what do you do, how did you end up unconscious in the forest. That kind of thing. Well, the pieces you remember, at least.
Hmmm? Well I was raised in the main chapter-house of the Holy Order of the Templars. From a young age I trained to protect sacred places and smite heretics if they ever appeared. So I got knocked out traveling as I've been sent to see if they’re any heretical activities happening out in the world. Basically a world tour of sorts?

So anyway moving on into the west, we’re going to be Blasted Lands soon if I keep straight west, more north is the Baltic Lake and to the south is the town of Whister. Where should I go?

>Tom
Tom? Devourer Tom? God of Chaos Tom? That Tom? Because we totally know that guy.

>Where go?
Town seems a good place to start. Get some supplies, see if you can find information on any nearby heretics. Beats looking for them blind.

>>480389
You can just call us questers, or something. I was never good with names. Say, does this 'Tom' happen to be a god of chaos?
Oh, and head to the Blasted Lands. That sounds pretty heretical. Unless, of course, the things there will kill you with a mean look.

>>480389
Some of us are dwarves. Now go smite all trees with 108 or more branches.

And if Tom is the local chaos god, then yeah we know him.

Town is the best place to go right now.

Town is definitely the best place to find heretics/information about heretics. Also most of us don't have names and prefer to help our charges anonymously, I may be stretching the definition of help for some of us though.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/23(Sun)17:02 No. 480503 ID: 60c0a1
File 135631092645.png - (280.10KB , 800x600 , BT10.png )

>>480391 You can just call us questers, or something. I was never good with names.
>>480417 Also most of us don't have names and prefer to help our charges anonymously, I may be stretching the definition of help for some of us though.
It's alright questers, I just want something better to call all of you then just headvoices or that committee in my head.

>>480391 Say, does this 'Tom' happen to be a god of chaos?
>>480390 Tom? Devourer Tom? God of Chaos Tom? That Tom? Because we totally know that guy.
Yes, I've had the honor of guarding some of his tables and feasts. How do you know him?

>>480390 Town seems a good place to start. Get some supplies, see if you can find information on any nearby heretics. Beats looking for them blind.
>>480405 [u]Town is the best place to go right now.
>>480417 Town is definitely the best place to find heretics/information about heretics
Well I've just gone into the town of Whister. What should I do first? Picking up some supplies at the stores would be nice but the main square might have people talking. What do you think questers?

>>480503
Head to the nearest gay bar.

To ask them if they've seen any heretics, of course.

>>480503
Tom, well, some of us had a hand in his ascension. And this isn't the only universe he's wiggled his tentacles into.

>>480506
Hey, speaking of which, what is the opinion of gays in your universe and/or society? Is it heretical? Because if so, we know where to purse some heretics. And if not it's still a bar and therefore a tavern, so there's sure to be quests and news of heretics and stuff.

Let's go get some supplies and while we're there try to find the local black market, I'm sure plenty of heretics shop there.

Recruit a soldier.
Name them 'DICKS'

>How do you know him?
We were actually in his head, more than once. Had a hand in some of his adventures, pre-ascention. And helped him fool with some of his worshipers, post-godhood.

Take to the stores; make sure to go down all of the darkest alleys, there are dames to be rescued!

Maybe you can get some proper armor and tell us why you were walking through the knockout forest in the first place.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/24(Mon)14:51 No. 480612 ID: 60c0a1
File 135638946696.png - (196.14KB , 800x600 , BT11.png )

>>480515 Let's go get some supplies and while we're there try to find the local black market, I'm sure plenty of heretics shop there.
>>480557 Take to the stores; make sure to go down all of the darkest alleys, there are dames to be rescued!

Maybe you can get some proper armor and tell us why you were walking through the knockout forest in the first place.
This is probably a good idea, but there's not many dark alleys here or black markets. Anyway I'll see if they have any good armor around for sale but I wouldn't get my hopes up. As for why I was walking through knockout forest, well it seemed to be the fastest way towards adventure. In any case what should I buy? Generally because I'm a Templar buying useful things won't be difficult but I won't abuse the privileges the Order gives us.

>>480517 Recruit a soldier.
Name them 'DICKS'
What in the world are you talking about?

>>480514 Hey, speaking of which, what is the opinion of gays in your universe and/or society? Is it heretical? Because if so, we know where to purse some heretics. And if not it's still a bar and therefore a tavern, so there's sure to be quests and news of heretics and stuff.
>>480506 Head to the nearest gay bar.

To ask them if they've seen any heretics, of course.
Gender preference generally isn't that big a deal in this world, except for some martial orders but it's kind of hard to keep your mind on combat when you're worrying about a kid at home. Besides they aren't heretical, heretics are those who claim to speak for or in a god's name when they aren't. When the gods themselves speak, there's never ambiguity about who or who isn't a heretic. As for a "gay bar" I don't think this town has such a thing. Well it has a tavern and I agree that going there for information is a good idea. But let me get some supplies first.

Okay, first off: inventory check.
What's your status for money and equipment right now?

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/24(Mon)20:52 No. 480644 ID: 60c0a1
File 135641117072.png - (17.76KB , 800x600 , BT11A.png )

>>480624 Okay, first off: inventory check.
What's your status for money and equipment right now?
Ok what I have on hand is
1 Noob Leather Shirt
1 Noob Iron Lance
and 1 Noob Wooden Shield
Plus I think I can reasonably buy up to 5000 coins of merchandise on Templar credit.

Without knowing how much things cost, I'll just throw out the general idea 'buy defense, you get more out of it'.

So... no rations, no waterskin, fire starting supplies, bedroll, knife, etc? You should have the basics if you're going to survive in the wilderness.

After buying stuff ask around if they have been having any problems with outlaws or other such evildoers.

You should always start with a weapons upgrade so you can one shot the weakest of the generic enemies you can face, so upgrade from the Noob Iron Lance to the Loser Iron Lance, Anointing Ward should be able to make up for having lowered defenses from using the weakest armor available for now until we can earn some more funds.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/25(Tue)11:46 No. 480689 ID: 60c0a1
File 135646481871.png - (27.70KB , 800x600 , BT11B.png )

>>480648 So... no rations, no waterskin, fire starting supplies, bedroll, knife, etc? You should have the basics if you're going to survive in the wilderness.
1 Bedroll
1 Waterskin
1 Set of Flint and Tinder
1 Knife
1 Backpack
3 days worth of trail rations
Cost 150 Coins
Done
>>480674 You should always start with a weapons upgrade so you can one shot the weakest of the generic enemies you can face, so upgrade from the Noob Iron Lance to the Loser Iron Lance, Anointing Ward should be able to make up for having lowered defenses from using the weakest armor available for now until we can earn some more funds.
Trading in Noob Iron Lance
Buying Loser Iron Lance
Cost 290 Coins
Well I'd feel more comfortable having a better layer between me and total disembowelment thank you very much.

>>480647 Without knowing how much things cost, I'll just throw out the general idea 'buy defense, you get more out of it'.
Trading in Noob Leather Shirt
Buying Loser Leather Shirt
Cost 490 Coins
>>480657 After buying stuff ask around if they have been having any problems with outlaws or other such evildoers.
I'll do that but before that should I buy any of these as well?
Healing Potions- Recover 20 HP for 150 Coins
Antidotes- Cure Poison for 35 Coins
Mana Potions- Recover 5 MP for 500 Coins

We definitely need at least one antidote. Lets get two or so.

Wow, the antidotes are cheap! Get like 5 of them. And 2 or 3 hp pots. The mp pots are way too expensive and heal very little to be worth it.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/25(Tue)19:12 No. 480717 ID: 60c0a1
File 135649154482.png - (17.16KB , 800x600 , BT11C.png )

>>480695 We definitely need at least one antidote. Lets get two or so
>>480698 Wow, the antidotes are cheap! Get like 5 of them. And 2 or 3 hp pots. The mp pots are way too expensive and heal very little to be worth it.
5 Antidotes
3 Healing Potions
Cost 625 Coins

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/25(Tue)19:15 No. 480718 ID: 60c0a1
File 135649171615.png - (67.90KB , 800x600 , BT12.png )

>>480657 After buying stuff ask around if they have been having any problems with outlaws or other such evildoers.
Okay then, hello has there been any trouble around here lately?
Kobold Shopkeeper- Not much here Blasted Place and Knockout Forest make us not a easy target

I'd say 1 Hp pot and 3 antidotes so we're covered for any situation but not abusing the privilege of the order too much.

>>480718
Ask him where to find the nearest gay community center.

Does he know of anywhere else that does have that sort of problem more often?

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/26(Wed)08:33 No. 480764 ID: 60c0a1
File 135653960937.png - (86.88KB , 800x600 , BT13.png )

>>480730 Does he know of anywhere else that does have that sort of problem more often?
So do you know of any trouble anywhere?
Kobold Shopkeeper-Well up North there's talk of part of the lake being frozen over. Also in the southern desert not rather safe at the moment, with the jackal tribes going around climbing in ya windows snatching the people up. They're hiding their kids, hiding their husbands, and hiding their men. The women are fed up with this cause there's not enough husbands now to go around. Also the Valkyries seem to buy things for some big fight.

>>480725 Ask him where to find the nearest gay community center.
Huh? Why do you keep on telling me to do this? Fine. Ummmmm do you know where guys can... meet... guys...?
Kobold Shopkeeper: Don't you meet in taverns? There is one in the town center. They have good chicken pie.

Let us teach them jackals a lesson

We got a tribe of critters actually raiding people? They seem like the most immediate problem to take care of.

Thank the shopkeep, and let's be off.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/27(Thu)17:37 No. 480902 ID: 60c0a1
File 135665862052.png - (293.59KB , 800x600 , BT14.png )

>>480784 We got a tribe of critters actually raiding people? They seem like the most immediate problem to take care of.

Thank the shopkeep, and let's be off.


I thanked the shopkeeper and left the town. The Jackal tribes live to the south in the deserts. Well I took the southern road, but it'll be a trip towards that area. How fast should I travel. Day and night eating and other things on the road or taking breaks and getting full night's sleep?

>>480783 Let us teach them jackals a lesson
I've heard of the Jackal tribes. They were made from the black clay by the riversides in the desert. The jackals have a larger male to female ratio of birth so their females are treasured. Women have the right to accept or reject any prospective sire of their children. However the race is rather sensual and primal so the men aren't trusted to take care of the women so they abduct others to do so. Still the captives are treated and paid well from what I've heard. I don't understand why though, and this amount of people being taken usually doesn't happen. So it is strange...

>>480902
Regular rest, being tired before a fight starts won't be good.

This still sounds worth investigating. Be careful not to get ambushed yourself on the way there.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/29(Sat)15:10 No. 481085 ID: 9b006d
File 135682260192.png - (157.05KB , 800x600 , BT15.png )

>>480950 This still sounds worth investigating. Be careful not to get ambushed yourself on the way there.
>>480943 Regular rest, being tired before a fight starts won't be good.
Well it'll take me the better part of the week but setting a pace where I rest regularly is the best idea. I haven't met anybody, neutral or enemy on the road. Then again only a few dedicated travelers would be headed towards the desert. Actually I'm rather relieved I didn't have to fight. I'll need a lot of strength if I want to survive in the desert. I've found a cave a ways from the road and will set up camp here. In truth I'm making good time.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/29(Sat)15:10 No. 481086 ID: 9b006d
File 135682265413.png - (138.50KB , 800x600 , BT16.png )

Good night you questers. See you tommorrow. ZZZZzzzzzz...

Wake up, you're being ambushed.

leap up and deflect attack with rock hard abs

Wake up you gonna get ...ambushed.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/30(Sun)18:25 No. 481357 ID: 9b006d
File 135692072848.png - (117.64KB , 800x600 , BT17.png )

Yeesh, my whole body's aching, funny thing, everybody's all for adventure till they find out about the little things like sleeping on the cold hard ground.

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/30(Sun)18:28 No. 481358 ID: 9b006d
File 135692088318.png - (162.26KB , 800x600 , BT18.png )

>>481093 Wake up, you're being ambushed.
>>481099 leap up and deflect attack with rock hard abs
>>481128 Wake up you gonna get...ambushed.
Well that'll explain this, you know warnings are so very helpful when a corgi isn't fast asleep you know.

>>481357
That's why you're supposed to put blankets below you as well as well as above. Helps with the hardness, and the cold ground can be as much a heat thief as the cold air.

>>481358
Hey, we tried. Not our fault you didn't listen. Adventures kind of need to learn to sleep light.

Wiggle your niblets!

I don't suppose you have any handy templar powers?

Whatever. Put them canines to good use- start chewing through the rope.

Start rubbing that rope on the stone wall to fray it, eventually you'll get it down to the point where you can snap them.

Since someone tied you up, it stands to reason that they'll be back soon. That's when you snap the ropes and destroy them with your corgi might!

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/31(Mon)16:49 No. 481499 ID: 9b006d
File 135700134507.png - (149.98KB , 800x600 , BT19.png )

>>481360 That's why you're supposed to put blankets below you as well as well as above. Helps with the hardness, and the cold ground can be as much a heat thief as the cold air.
Hey, we tried. Not our fault you didn't listen. Adventures kind of need to learn to sleep light.
Thanks I'll remember that next time if there is one. Actually this is my first time roaming the world... Most of my life has been spent in an Order Chapterhouse.
>>481363 Wiggle your niblets!
Wiggle my what?

>>481367 I don't suppose you have any handy templar powers?
Huh? You mean utility abilities? I only know Speak with Deity (10 MP) but I don't think talking to a god would help right now.

>>481368 Whatever. Put them canines to good use- start chewing through the rope.
Whoever this person is, he's good, the ropes are just out of my reach.

>>481452 Start rubbing that rope on the stone wall to fray it, eventually you'll get it down to the point where you can snap them.

Since someone tied you up, it stands to reason that they'll be back soon. That's when you snap the ropes and destroy them with your corgi might!
Ummm I think it's a bit late for that...

???-Hello, sorry I tied you up, but I needed somewhere to sleep and I was afraid that you'll wake up early and try to kill me.

What should I do now?

Alright, diplomacy time then.
Ask to be untied, and what happened with your bedroll and other stuff, seeing as how it was an absolute terrible sleep.

"Hey, I'm a good guy! I don't kill people unless I need to! It's, like, my thing, you know?"

Well... alright then? No hard feelings if I get untied and get my stuff back.

Why would he expect a Templar to kill him?
Unless... is he a heretic?

do what you think is safe, not murder, but as with spear & defence, act as welcoming, but take note, you will have to kill them, no matter how close unless others that need ending

Bitquest Justacritic 2012/12/31(Mon)18:46 No. 481557 ID: 9b006d
File 135700841029.png - (108.72KB , 800x600 , BT20.png )

>>481525 Why would he expect a Templar to kill him?
Unless... is he a heretic?
Ah hah, funny thing about that, I haven't earned the privilege of wearing the cross mantle yet and it looks like this fox hasn't gone through my things to see my things to see the token that says I'm a Templar. Besides if he really was a heretic I would most likely be dead by now. Heretics usually are able to know who we are by sight.

>>481501Alright, diplomacy time then.
Ask to be untied, and what happened with your bedroll and other stuff, seeing as how it was an absolute terrible sleep.
>>481514"Hey, I'm a good guy! I don't kill people unless I need to! It's, like, my thing, you know?"
>>481522Well... alright then? No hard feelings if I get untied and get my stuff back.
>>481538[u]do what you think is safe, not murder, but as with spear & defence, act as welcoming, but take note, you will have to kill them, no matter how close unless others that need ending
I'll try talking then, the fact that I'm alive makes me sure that this isn't a heretic.
Hey I'm a Templar so you don't need to be afraid that I would've killed you in your sleep. Could you let me go now? Anyway who are you?

Oh alright then. Me? I'm Martin Ventus, an Affliction Sorcerer. I'm on a journey to become a master sorcerer... You said you're a Templar? Could I travel with you for a while? You see I'm a magic user and we're a little squishy.

>>481557
Ask how he feels about killing heretics. If he isn't strongly opposed, let him travel with you.

>Affliction Sorcerer
...is that the kind of thing templars are down with? Doesn't sound particularly positive.

But yeah, if he's not a heretic, we don't mind traveling with a mage. They can be handy.

Warn him you're going to deal with some jackals harassing people. Maybe purge some heretics and all that good stuff too.

Perfect combination! You can tank and he can DPS.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/01(Tue)17:48 No. 481740 ID: 9b006d
File 135709129510.png - (110.35KB , 800x600 , BT21.png )

>>481562 >Affliction Sorcerer
...is that the kind of thing templars are down with? Doesn't sound particularly positive.

But yeah, if he's not a heretic, we don't mind traveling with a mage. They can be handy.
They're magic users with a talent of having nasty effects with their battle magic. I agree magic would be helpful.

>>481561 Ask how he feels about killing heretics. If he isn't strongly opposed, let him travel with you.
So how do you feel about heretics?
They're a rather nasty sort, nobody likes their kind around any civilized area.
>>481566 Warn him you're going to deal with some jackals harassing people. Maybe purge some heretics and all that good stuff too.
I'm also looking into the Jackal tribes, they seem to be abducting more people than normal. Heretics may be involved.
That's strange I've also heard that they're abducting women as well.

Well questors should I let him join me?

Might as well. You are the defender class, so having a glass cannon in the party is more feasible than with most people.

Yes.
Because you will need someone to switch in and out with on night watch, since apparently we can't do that from this perspective. These guys we're going after abduct people, you don't want to be caught off-guard again.

Yes.
What is his name?
Feel his bum.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/03(Thu)17:00 No. 482093 ID: dc5623
File 135726123915.png - (150.11KB , 800x600 , BT22.png )

>>481746 Yes.
Because you will need someone to switch in and out with on night watch, since apparently we can't do that from this perspective. These guys we're going after abduct people, you don't want to be caught off-guard again.

Yeah that'll be a good idea. I was lucky this wasn't someone who really wanted to kill me.

>>481753 Yes.
What is his name?
Feel his bum.
It was Martin Ventus, he mentioned that earlier, and why in the Temple's name would I want to do that?

I would be honored to travel with you Martin Ventus. May this be a good idea for both of us. Now could you let me out of this?
Oh sure.

???? Justacritic 2013/01/03(Thu)17:01 No. 482094 ID: dc5623
File 135726127597.png - (28.97KB , 800x600 , BT23.png )

???-Sigh...

>>482094

Let me guess, you're Tom?

Hi, are you this universe's version of Tom?

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/03(Thu)18:49 No. 482108 ID: dc5623
File 135726777054.png - (38.86KB , 800x600 , BT24.png )

Tom-Oh hey it's you guys! How're ya doing? Funny meeting you here of all places =)

>>482095 Let me guess, you're Tom?
Tom-Who else would this lovable mug belong to?

>>482096 Hi, are you this universe's version of Tom?
Tom-Yes and no

Alright then. So, superposition of Tom and not-Tom, what's up?

What are we breaking today, chief?

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/04(Fri)15:10 No. 482336 ID: dc5623
File 135734103867.png - (73.82KB , 800x600 , BT25.png )

>>482110 Alright then. So, superposition of Tom and not-Tom, what's up?
>>482221 What are we breaking today, chief?
Tom-Nothing much, just doing my job here in this particular plane of existence. Been keeping watch for anything interesting, the policy is more... customer and employee oriented. It's a pretty cushy gig too. By the way why are you here?

I'm blaming it on the booze and adorable dog people. Also, skeletor.

>By the way why are you here?
Dunno. We just end up places. We don't have much control over things.

We were just advising some kind of Corgi Templar dude. Feel free to throw some chaos his way, keep things interesting.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/04(Fri)18:12 No. 482439 ID: dc5623
File 135735196281.png - (92.21KB , 800x600 , BT26.png )

>>482341 I'm blaming it on the booze and adorable dog people. Also, skeletor.
Tom-Ah man you won't believe the booze we got here! Oh Skeletor, that idiot in Castle Hellskull, don't let him bother you too much.

>>482361 Dunno. We just end up places. We don't have much control over things.

We were just advising some kind of Corgi Templar dude. Feel free to throw some chaos his way, keep things interesting.
Tom-Hmmm you mean that corgi walking around the desert with that fox? Their lives are going to be interesting enough without my help, after all they got you guys. Still I'll keep an eye on them, they're a riot! Anyway you should be getting back to them now. Got any last minute questions?

I have a question! Does the templars swearing off the wiles of women thing include men?

You sure they couldn't use some chaos? Spontaneous technicolor sand? Animate weapons? Bikinis? Baleful Polymorph?

What were you looking so grumpy about before we showed up anyways?

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)13:46 No. 482649 ID: dc5623
File 135742240612.png - (42.56KB , 800x600 , BT27.png )

>>482453 I have a question! Does the templars swearing off the wiles of women thing include men?
Tom-I see what you did there. No, so go wild you guys!

>>482455 You sure they couldn't use some chaos? Spontaneous technicolor sand? Animate weapons? Bikinis? Baleful Polymorph?

What were you looking so grumpy about before we showed up anyways?
Tom-Hey who the God of Chaos, Eating, Fun, Comedy, and Parties around here? I would be the first to say there's never enough chaos, but there's no point in adding to something that's gonna be already good you know?
Why I so serious? Well I gotta deal with paperwork just finished a batch. So I was wondering what should I do to unwind. Anyway better get back to that Templar you guys been talking about.
If you see her, give my hellos to Chee.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)13:49 No. 482653 ID: dc5623
File 135742258459.png - (419.43KB , 800x600 , BT28.png )

think you got it bad. I've got a robe and a cloak, thank you very much!
Well, why don't you just take it off?

Whoa there, take it a little slower bro.

Also there's something behind you.

Pfff. Robes and a clock insulate you. There's a reason desert dwellers dress that way, keeps you cool. I'm in full defender armor, here.

Also, there's someone (on a mount, I think?) between those spikes on the hill behind you.

Hey, sorry about that, we got side tracked for a bit so what happened while we were gone?

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)15:46 No. 482746 ID: dc5623
File 135742958889.png - (424.25KB , 800x600 , BT29.png )

>>482735 Hey, sorry about that, we got side tracked for a bit so what happened while we were gone?
Where have you guys been! You had me worried there, well we managed to make it to the desert and by the Temple this heat is killing me.
Hey are these those voices you told me about, and wait how can I hear you all?

>>482674 Pfff. Robes and a clock insulate you. There's a reason desert dwellers dress that way, keeps you cool. I'm in full defender armor, here.
Actually not full defender armor but still what they said!
Oh you would think that, try it with a layer of fur as well!

>>482669 Whoa there, take it a little slower bro.

Also there's something behind you.
>>482674 Also, there's someone (on a mount, I think?) between those spikes on the hill behind you.
Huh? What are you talking about?
Someone behind us? That's... a desert scorpion... but they're not that usually huge...
What now?

well magic man show us what you can do. zap that thing.

Can you use paralyze or slow? If you can stop him long enough, Kero should be able to cut off one of his legs or tail.

Hey Martin, Yeah sometimes joining someone who can hear us makes you hear us too. That's how we know Kero isn't crazy because head voices caused by being crazy aren't contagious. So what exactly are you capable of as an affliction sorcerer, does that mean you specialize in status ailments? We'll need to know before we can suggest things so we don't recommend you throw lightning at it only to discover that isn't something you can do.

Yeah, let's get a status report from Marty here. Equipment, spells, skills, yadayada.
Also, you can hear us now because you are in Kero's party. We are Kero's questers, which basically means we're lesser advice gods for adventurers.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)16:30 No. 482783 ID: dc5623
File 135743223223.png - (425.88KB , 800x600 , BT30.png )

>>482771 Hey Martin, Yeah sometimes joining someone who can hear us makes you hear us too. That's how we know Kero isn't crazy because head voices caused by being crazy aren't contagious. So what exactly are you capable of as an affliction sorcerer, does that mean you specialize in status ailments? We'll need to know before we can suggest things so we don't recommend you throw lightning at it only to discover that isn't something you can do.
>>482768 Can you use paralyze or slow? If you can stop him long enough, Kero should be able to cut off one of his legs or tail.
>>482750 well magic man show us what you can do. zap that thing.
Oh right, well yes I do specialize in status ailments but they are added as a side effect of elemental spells as well. Here's what I got for combat.
HP 11/11 MP 33/33
Affliction Boost-Passive-Gives a minor increase to the odds of inflicting a status ailment
Poison Gust-3MP-Does light Wind Damage and has a small chance of inflicting poison
Scalding Spark-3MP-Does light Fire Damage and has a small chance of inflicting a burn
Should we fight that bug?

"how can I hear you all?"

We've mentioned we're minor deities, right?
Oh, and from past experience, large-r beasts tend to have become so by someone selectively breeding/magic-ing them larger. I'd expect Jackals soon.

Well, that thing's a bug, so I'd expect it to be weak to poison. As a desert dweller, it's probably fairly resistant to heat and burns.

So make with the poison magic pew pews, and templar stabbings, already.

>We've mentioned we're minor deities, right?
Oh yeah, totally. Just got off a conference call with one of our peers. QuQ

Bug is weak to Fire, kill it with Fire!
No wait, wrong system.

Yeah give Poison Gust a shot then get behind Kero. Kero, defense buff yourself.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)18:07 No. 482866 ID: dc5623
File 135743806862.png - (710.35KB , 800x600 , BT31.png )

It's coming!
Battle initiated

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)18:10 No. 482871 ID: dc5623
File 135743823871.png - (281.17KB , 800x600 , BT32.png )

So yeah this is bigger than I thought it would be. Wish we had somebody that knows Scanning.
We go first, so what tactics should we go by?

Kero: Anointing Ward on Self
Martin: Poison Gust on Scorpion

Theme Justacritic 2013/01/05(Sat)18:16 No. 482884 ID: dc5623
Audio 24-The_Decisive_Battle-FFVI_OST.mp3 - (1.82MB , 24-The Decisive Battle-FFVI OST.mp3 )

(By the way combat music)

We don't have a healer yet and Marin has way too few HP to be taking any hits so if you're not already in the back row get there other wise just drop a couple Poison Gusts. Kero go ahead and put an Anointing Ward on Martin and wait to see this things damage output before deciding whether to use another one this fight on yourself or not.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/06(Sun)18:32 No. 483191 ID: dc5623
File 135752594732.png - (315.33KB , 800x600 , BT33.png )

>>482910 We don't have a healer yet and Marin has way too few HP to be taking any hits so if you're not already in the back row get there other wise just drop a couple Poison Gusts. Kero go ahead and put an Anointing Ward on Martin and wait to see this things damage output before deciding whether to use another one this fight on yourself or not.
>>482878 Martin: Poison Gust on Scorpion
Martin cast Poison Gust Huge Scorpion takes 26 damage!
Kero blessed Martin with [b] Anointing Ward
Martin's defense increased
Huge Scorpion scratches Kero with its claw
Kero takes 2 damage

Ugh you better keep back Martin
Why? That thing merely scratched you.
I've got a heavy divine blessing on me, what about you?
Oh

Next Round's Tactics?

Kero: Show him your stabs.
Martin: Scalding Spark. We should test to see which is more effective, for future reference in our COMPENDIUM OF MONSTERS.

Do the damaging status effects stack with themselves? In either case, we should try the burning one.

I don't think the Wind spell actually applied the poison this round. It's only a chance each time, and I think wind is still going to be more effective against a desert creature than fire.

My vote goes for using wind again, and showing it all the stabs.

Quick, do a barrel roll!

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/07(Mon)12:01 No. 483334 ID: dc5623
File 135758888158.png - (353.45KB , 800x600 , BT34.png )

>>483201 Kero: Show him your stabs.
Martin: Scalding Spark. We should test to see which is more effective, for future reference in our COMPENDIUM OF MONSTERS.
>>483209 Do the damaging status effects stack with themselves? In either case, we should try the burning one.
>>483222 I don't think the Wind spell actually applied the poison this round. It's only a chance each time, and I think wind is still going to be more effective against a desert creature than fire.

My vote goes for using wind again, and showing it all the stabs.
Martin cast Scalding Spark Huge Scorpion takes 2 damage.
Kero pierces with his lance. Huge Scorpion takes 16 damage.
Huge Scorpion scratches Kero. Kero takes 2 damage.

What in? It's not that effective?
Stab-y, staby-y, stab!
>>483270 Quick, do a barrel roll!
I don't know that technique!
Don't look at me, I'm a sorcerer I don't do acrobatics.

Next Round Tactics?

Okay continue to poison gust and stab it until either it dies, Kero falls below 10 health when he'll want to use a potion, Martin takes a hit so we can figure out when he should quaff potions, or the scorpion does something different.

Oh noes, FIRE isn't very useful in a DESERT. Who would have guessed that such a thing might be true?

Yeah, stabs and Air attacks.

>>483338
It had to be tested. For science.

>>483336
This, pretty much.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/07(Mon)13:43 No. 483360 ID: dc5623
File 135759498453.png - (317.83KB , 800x600 , BT35.png )

>>483336 Okay continue to poison gust and stab it until either it dies, Kero falls below 10 health when he'll want to use a potion, Martin takes a hit so we can figure out when he should quaff potions, or the scorpion does something different.
>>483338 Oh noes, FIRE isn't very useful in a DESERT. Who would have guessed that such a thing might be true?

Yeah, stabs and Air attacks.
Martin casts Poison Gust Huge Scorpion takes 27 damage.
Huge Scorpion claws Kero. Kero takes 2 damage.
Kero pierces with his lance. Huge Scorpion takes 12 damage.
Huge Scorpion dies!
Huge Scorpion inexplicably has 500 gold on its person.

>>483338
I was thinking that Poison would not be effective against a creature which is often poisonous, but apparently not.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/07(Mon)13:44 No. 483362 ID: dc5623
File 135759506716.png - (417.55KB , 800x600 , BT36.png )

Well that was a nice distraction. What now?
I can see one of the Jackal tribe cities in the distance over there. But what do you recommend?

It would be dangerous to let ourselves get kidnapped until we've completed our initial investigation so we should disguise you two as women so neither of you get stolen up in the night.

>>483361
Obviously we're using Crawl logic here. All the bugs have rPois-.

>What now?
Grind scorpions for the next ten hours or so.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/07(Mon)18:12 No. 483406 ID: dc5623
File 135761114179.png - (418.74KB , 800x600 , BT37.png )

>>483365 It would be dangerous to let ourselves get kidnapped until we've completed our initial investigation so we should disguise you two as women so neither of you get stolen up in the night.
No.
But the Jackals revere wome-
No, I don't have much pride as a man so I'm not giving up what little I have.
Well it looks like that idea won't work.

>>483366 Grind scorpions for the next ten hours or so.
Huh? I don't know what you're thinking but grinding up the scorpion utterly ruins their venom sacs and contaminates the distillation process.
I think they're talking about a different meaning.
Anyway, I think we should just ask around in the city. I mean we're not likely to be assaulted in the streets or else it would be more than likely that a war would start over that.
Then what questions do you want us to ask the people in the city?

Fine let someone sneak into your window and run off with you in the middle of the night. Martin can attest to how easy it is to catch you unaware in your sleep. As for questions, we should look into the buildings previous victims were taken from see how they're getting in and see what general region the abductors are operating in.

Fine, but you're doing night watches. Check the state of the city first, and ask around for quests, act like any other templar/adventurer passing through. Don't seem suspicious.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/08(Tue)20:41 No. 483759 ID: dc5623
File 135770651856.png - (367.00KB , 800x600 , BT38.png )

>>483421 Fine let someone sneak into your window and run off with you in the middle of the night. Martin can attest to how easy it is to catch you unaware in your sleep. As for questions, we should look into the buildings previous victims were taken from see how they're getting in and see what general region the abductors are operating in.
Well it's a normal regular Jackal tribe city, there doesn't seem to be any fear of strangers here.
While there are very few people on the street I say it has to do with the heat.
>>483449 Fine, but you're doing night watches. Check the state of the city first, and ask around for quests, act like any other templar/adventurer passing through. Don't seem suspicious.
Ugh I'm not that helpless you know.
It's a bit strange, I don't feel hostility but more of curiosity..., the unnerving kind, who should we ask questions?

Maybe you should look behind you?

Avoid openly looking at the guy behind you unless he gets closer. You should just ask around for quest stuff like normal, stay a night in the inn, then ambush the guys who will probably try to kidnap you.

>>484092
Reverse ambush!

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/12(Sat)11:33 No. 484826 ID: 80a28e
File 135801920403.png - (396.52KB , 800x600 , BT39.png )

>>484092 Avoid openly looking at the guy behind you unless he gets closer. You should just ask around for quest stuff like normal, stay a night in the inn, then ambush the guys who will probably try to kidnap you.
>>484183 Reverse ambush!
That sounds like a great idea!
We are in an inn. There's an innkeeper here, but what sort of questions do we ask him? Besides what's up?
Jackal Innkeeper-Adventurers? Do you wish to purchase rooming?
Yes but tell us has there been anything unusual happening around these parts?
Jackal Innkeeper- Well yes, scorpions have been getting larger for the past few months, and strange people have been sighted wandering the sands. The desert has been showing signs of mortal sacrifice mostly from areas surrounding the desert. It's gotten so bad that the tribes are abducting everyone else for their own safety.

Secret mortal sacrifices? That sounds acts of like HERESY to me. Ask where these things were sighted, and if there is enough time left in the day we should head out there to investigate.

I don't think I trust the tribes to be uninvolved in this, but it would be foolish to say so right now. We should still go through the plan to confront the abductors if we have not found a better lead before then.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/19(Sat)19:45 No. 486396 ID: ae196a
File 135865350498.png - (397.76KB , 800x600 , BT40.png )

>>484830 Secret mortal sacrifices? That sounds acts of like HERESY to me. Ask where these things were sighted, and if there is enough time left in the day we should head out there to investigate.

I don't think I trust the tribes to be uninvolved in this, but it would be foolish to say so right now. We should still go through the plan to confront the abductors if we have not found a better lead before then.
So where have these sacrifices been?
Jackal Innkeep- They're usually found... after the fact. That's mainly the reason why the tribes are doing preemptive abductions. There are very few signs to tell who is next on these sacrificial attacks.
One room for two please
Jackal Innkeep- That will be 50 coins.
-50 Coins
450 Coins left

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/19(Sat)19:47 No. 486397 ID: ae196a
File 135865364684.png - (260.02KB , 800x600 , BT41.png )

So all you questers, there is enough time to go on searching around the desert but there's the risk that it will be dark by the time we finish the day's search.
I'd say that we should take the time to rest after all those blasted searing days.
Still standing around won't help but what do you think we should do?

You should ask around town for more info on the heretical sacrifices.

Searching around the desert without a specific location in mind sounds unlikely to help much. Resting a bit and looking around town until nightfall sounds like a decent plan.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/26(Sat)18:45 No. 487790 ID: ae196a
File 135925472048.png - (384.72KB , 800x600 , BT42.png )

>>486432 Searching around the desert without a specific location in mind sounds unlikely to help much. Resting a bit and looking around town until nightfall sounds like a decent plan.
>>486398 You should ask around town for more info on the heretical sacrifices.
Yeah, it'll be better if we're fully rested before tackling gathering information.
Fine, we'll take a short break but then we're going to get to the bottom of this.

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/26(Sat)18:48 No. 487792 ID: ae196a
File 135925491574.png - (140.54KB , 800x600 , BT43.png )

???:I’m not the type for feel good speeches, you all know that about me right?
So I’m not going to sprout anything about for your country, for glory or honor!
So if you need a reason for fighting then here’s one for you!

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/01/26(Sat)18:53 No. 487794 ID: ae196a
File 135925521504.png - (77.85KB , 600x800 , BT44.png )

We’re going to get rid of every last shitty nome from our tunnels!!! Now who’s with me?!?!

This is your mother speaking, can you hear me?

OOOOOoooooOOOOOooo, why didn't you visit me when I was sick, honey bunches?
I miiiIIIIIiiiiIIIIssed yooOOOooou!

You are now being haunted.

kobold vs. gnomes?

what do you know about these guys?

Kill all the nomes, and take their stuff!

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/02/09(Sat)11:27 No. 491643 ID: ef802f
File 136043802256.png - (24.14KB , 800x600 , BT 45.png )

???: Oh it's you guys, never thought I'd ever hear from you again. Do me a favor,
Kobold Army: All hail, Darth Shabin! Hail! Death to the nomes!
Darth Shabin: Remind me to punch the teeth out whoever thought tall black capes were a good idea.

Ohh yeah, I hate how they pool around your feet so your always a moment away from tripping into a perfect face-plant.

Why are you wearing one, anyway? Everyone knows elaborate hats are much better overlord attire.

wait why is shabin and tom in this
im so confused

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/02/15(Fri)17:51 No. 493257 ID: ef802f
File 136097947308.png - (24.42KB , 800x600 , BT46.png )

>>491691
>>491670
Darth Shabin: It was all Chee's idea, who knows what's going up in her head.

>>492025
Darth Shabin: That's what I should be asking you, why the hell are you guys in my head again? No don't tell me, there's another undead kobold thing walking around crying like a sissy and giving headaches all around, right?

Nah it's a Corgi this time, though nothing has hinted at him being undead and he hasn't done much crying since we meet him. So how did you get here? We were lead to believe this is another dimension.

It looks like you have been doing pretty well for yourself this universe, long cloaks aside.
I hear you are involved in some sort of gnome war?

Bitquest Justacritic 2013/03/04(Mon)18:27 No. 497883 ID: 038937
File 136245042805.png - (33.23KB , 800x600 , BT47.png )

>>493709
>>493517
Darth Shabin:... It's way too complicated to talk about, Chee said something about save state copying or something. Besides it's not gnomes, nomes. !^#!&* little things that go around doing nothing but raiding their head off. We're getting them out of our tunnels one way or another

>save state copying
You are fortunate to not be a tree that eats wagon meat.

So why do you have a 'Darth' title? Have you taken up choking incompetent underlings as a hobby?

Justacritic 2013/04/19(Fri)17:27 No. 506749 ID: 0441ec
File 136641763427.png - (147.73KB , 800x600 , BT48.png )

>>498444
It's all Chee's fault that we're called Darths. Still don't know what's going on in her head. Anyway yeah, choking idiots really makes my day but Chee's the only one that I'll kick down the stairs.

Shouldn't you be going now? It's always around this time that whoever you're stalking gets in a whole lot of shit.

And now back to our regular programming Justacritic 2013/06/24(Mon)18:07 No. 519267 ID: c5c7f2
File 137212242828.png - (58.98KB , 800x600 , BT49.png )

Two Idiots: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Whooa, hey guys it's been forever since we last saw you. So how's things?

didn't you already kill one of tho.... wait this one is black. is it a super scorpion?