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Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)14:24 No. 713048 ID: 1f8505
File 145954589331.png - (185.08KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 19.png )

When we LAST LEFT our HERO, he was stuck in some WORLD because the GAME CRASHED due to a DEFECTIVE GAME CARTRIDGE. But thanks to SAVE STATES you DOWNLOADED off the INTERNET, we are at the entrance to DR. TORI'S FORTRESS CASTLE. Now we can finally SAVE PRINCESS GIRLFRIEND.

It appears the WAY into the INNER SANCTUM is by that TRANSPORTILLATION PAD that the HELMETED DERP is guarding.

You are EQUIPPED with your trusty POTATO GUN, a POO, and the SWORD OF DROWS.

Mix poo and sword or drows and then use sword of drows on the guard.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)14:43 No. 713055 ID: 1f8505
File 145954701220.png - (198.58KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 20.png )

>>713050

You cannot COMBINE these ITEMS. That would be GROSS.

But you pull out your SWORD OF DROWS and WHACK the HELMETED DERP with it anyways. It DIES with a loud "DERP!" It drops NO SHINEYS since this is the LAST LEVEL and there are no VENDORS to SPEND your SHINEYS on.

The TRANSPORTILLATION PAD is now CLEAR for TRANSPORTILLATION.

Steal his sphere.

Eat poo.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)15:44 No. 713063 ID: 1f8505
File 145955067302.png - (159.65KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 21.png )

>>713055

What SPHERE? What are you TALKING about??

>>713062

This POO is a WEAPON and is NOT FOR EATING. Do you EAT GUNS and SWORDS? No you DON'T.

Headbutt the transportitillation pad.

>>713063
Transportalize.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)16:20 No. 713077 ID: 1f8505
File 145955283230.png - (163.91KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 22.png )

>>713064

That MOVE won't be AVAILABLE until the SUPER SMASH GUYS GAME comes out on the PRETENDO PII.

>>713069

As you step onto the TRANSPORTILLATION PAD, you are PARALYZED by a PARALYSIS FIELD! Suddenly, your ARCH-NEMESIS DR. TORI appears! BEHIND a THICK GLASS WINDOW, he TAUNTS you.

"HA HA HA! Looks like you fell into my TRAP, SUPER JUMPING GUY!"

>>713077
I guess so. Now what?

It's not like you could move your limbs anyway. This changes nothing! Throw the sword through the glass!

Jump

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)16:39 No. 713088 ID: 1f8505
File 145955394776.png - (154.37KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 23.png )

>>713081
>>713086

UNFORTUNATELY, you CANNOT MOVE in a PARALYSIS FIELD. Because it's PARALYZING, you see.

"I hope you're ready for a BOSS RUSH! HA HA HA HA HA!

You are then TRANSPORTILLATIZED AWAY.

>>713088
And then game over, you are dead.

Because it's only a half a teleporter. It disintegrates you but never puts you back together. Who needs a boss to kill you when the teleport already did?

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)16:56 No. 713091 ID: 1f8505
File 145955496071.png - (153.41KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 24.png )

>>713090

That would be RATHER ANTICLIMACTIC.

You are TRANSPORTILLATIZED to the FIRST BOSS: ATTORNEY DOG.

"Ready to get your SHIT SLAPPED? AGAIN? GWAR HAR HAR!"

>>713091
Say yes, you are in fact prepared with shit for him to smack. *Offer poo*

If that doesn't work just distract him with some gay porn.

>>713091
Jump and throw poo into his mouth while he's talking.

Why do you even have that.

Tell him to look! Cute furry boys behind him! Then shoot him in his weak spot with the potato gun.

Smear poop on his face and then blast him while he's blinded by the poop.

Slap POO. There, done. Next!

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)17:19 No. 713104 ID: 1f8505
File 145955639286.png - (152.91KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 25.png )

>>713094

You attempt a DISTRACTION.

"Hey look! Cute furry boys are right behind you!"

"THAT WON'T WORK ON ME AGAIN!" PREPARE TO HAVE YOUR SHIT SLAPPED!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)17:21 No. 713106 ID: 1f8505
File 145955648088.png - (168.31KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 26.png )

>>713092
>>713095
>>713100

You then THROW a POO at ATTORNEY DOG. It his him SQUARE in the FACE.

"HEY! THIS IS QUITE RUDE!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)17:22 No. 713107 ID: 1f8505
File 145955654439.png - (169.90KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 27.png )

You then SHOOT the ATTORNEY DOG until it DIES.

"AARRGGHHH! NOT AGAAAIIIINNNN!"

The ATTORNEY DOG has been DEFEATED.

You gotta speed this up. Try fighting two or more bosses at the same time.

>>713107
Use sword to cut him open, loot his heart for extra health.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)17:41 No. 713112 ID: 1f8505
File 145955771847.png - (123.20KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 28.png )

>>713108

UNFORTUNATELY, you are UNABLE to DICTATE the TERMS of BATTLE.

>>713109

ATTORNEY DOG has DISAPPEARED OFFSCREEN like all ENEMIES do. You are unable to LOOT his CORPSE.

The SECOND BOSS appears: MAGEY-CHAN

"We meet AGAIN, SUPER JUMPING GUY. I hope you've WRITTEN your WILL. Because you will DIE!"

I'm pretty sure wizards are weak versus gun. Have at him!

Vandalize Magey-Chan's wiki page to say he has 0 defense and attack.

>>713112
bribe him to go away with your 84 coins.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)18:01 No. 713117 ID: 1f8505
File 145955888412.png - (176.07KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 29.png )

>>713114

You manage to ALTER MAGEY-CHAN's WIKI PAGE so that he has NO DEFENSE OR ATTACK. You SHOW this to him.

"Look at this! You are powerless, Magey-Chan!"

"WHAT?! What is this VANDALISM?! It is all LIES!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)18:02 No. 713119 ID: 1f8505
File 145955895393.png - (132.95KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 30.png )

>>713113

You PROMPTLY ONE-SHOT MAGEY-CHAN with your POTATO GUN.

"Gakkk."

level up, NEXT!

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)18:21 No. 713126 ID: 1f8505
File 145956009722.png - (124.90KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 31.png )

>>713124

This isn't an RPG, SILLY! This is a PLATFORMER.

The THIRD BOSS APPEARS: The KOBOLD DRUBLUS!

"Hey look, I know I'm supposed to fight you again, but I'm tired and my feet hurt. Can I go home?"

Suggestion 2016/04/01(Fri)18:22 No. 713127 ID: 02422f
File 145956016556.png - (12.55KB , 872x167 , nogoodvandals.png )

>>713119
Aaaaand I'm dead. RIP, me.

Sure. Can I have your shovel?

>>713126
..Throw poop?

>>713126
Is your home... in Idaho?

Potato pew pew pew!

Kill driblis for ruining 4chan.

>>713126
Let him go home!

>>713126
Yes.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)20:59 No. 713174 ID: 1f8505
File 145956955189.png - (108.75KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 32.png )

>>713128
>>713135
>>713168

"Sure why not."

"Thanks. See ya around!"

DRUBLUS has been DEFEATED.

>>713174
Alright whos next

up up down down left right left right a b start.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)21:16 No. 713178 ID: 1f8505
File 145957057248.png - (135.37KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 33.png )

>>713175

The LAST BOSS APPEARS: LIMEBUSTER!

"Don't be SOUR over the fact that I'm about to beat you to a PULP!"

>>713177
You gained 30 EXTRA LIVES.

>>713178
Stab him.

Suck his rind.

>>713178
Lick him.

Squeeze his juices directly into your mouth.
Also, watch out for surprise tentacle.

>>713178
Tell him just because it has boobs, doesn't mean it's straight.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)22:03 No. 713187 ID: 1f8505
File 145957343837.png - (136.68KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 34.png )

>>713181
>>713182
>>713183

LIMEBUSTER is REALLY REALLY SOUR and would serve LITTLE PURPOSE in attempting to DRINK HIS FLUIDS. WHY would you even WANT to DO THAT.

>>713180

You STAB LIMEBUSTER... but it does LITTLE DAMAGE.

"HA! You cannot hope to even ZEST my TART FLESH with your tiny BLADE!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)22:04 No. 713188 ID: 1f8505
File 145957349121.png - (160.75KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 35.png )

LIMEBUSTER promply PUNCHES YOU in the FACE.

"BARF!"

>You dead, ding-dong!
>LIVES -1

Dropkick the sword even further into him when you respawn.

>>713188
Try jumping on him this time.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)22:18 No. 713196 ID: 1f8505
File 145957430004.png - (134.79KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 36.png )

You RESPAWN one LIFE lighter. LIMEBUSTER still remains.

"Come at me, BRO!"

Continue shedding lives until you are light enough to JUMP over the lime.

I said jump on him.

Also stop leaving updates in situations where we can't suggest anything at all. Like when we're paralyzed, or DEAD.

>>713198
this tbqh

Throw poo at him.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)22:31 No. 713203 ID: 1f8505
File 145957510427.png - (137.92KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 37.png )

>>713193
>>713198

You JUMP on LIMEBUSTER'S HEAD. His JUICE is SQUEEZED out of his BODY.

"AAAIIIIIEEEEEEEE"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)22:32 No. 713204 ID: 1f8505
File 145957516665.png - (129.08KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 38.png )

LIMEBUSTER is DEFEATED.

Make awful pun. Perhaps "Mr Citrus, maybe you should SIT DOWN."

Collect juice for later use. Drop SWORD if you have to.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)22:53 No. 713217 ID: 1f8505
File 145957643887.png - (148.87KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 39.png )

>>713205

You try to make a PUN.

"Boy, what a SOUR PUSS."

You CHUCKLE to YOURSELF.

>>713208

You DROP your SWORD OF DROWS and collect the LIMEBUSTER JUICE. It is ADDED to your INVENTORY.

You are then TRANSPORTILLATIZED back to the main CHAMBER, on the OTHER SIDE of the HEAVY GLASS WALL. One of TORI'S ANGRY ROBOT MINIONS is there to GREET you.

Hmmmm jump on it!

use juice to short circuit robot

hot wire him into a POWERFUL TRUCK.

Hug BOT
Squeeze the JUICE

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/01(Fri)23:51 No. 713231 ID: 1f8505
File 145957991891.png - (164.42KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 40.png )

>>713228
>>713220

You SPRINKLE the LIMEBREAKER JUICE on the ANGRY ROBOT. It SPARKS and SHORT-CIRCUITS, causing it to SHUT DOWN.

In the DISTANCE, you can hear a rather MASSIVE MACHINE starting to POWER UP. You SUSPECT it might be DR. TORI'S FINAL BOSS MACHINE.

>>713231

*LIMEBUSTER JUICE.

Man, we can't even KEEP the NAMES STRAIGHT.

>>713231
TEAR APART THE ROBOT AND WEAR IT AS A DISGUISE TO PRETEND YOU KILLED YOU AND AVOID THE BOSS

>>713233
This. So much this.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/03(Sun)14:47 No. 713628 ID: 1f8505
File 145972004247.png - (161.53KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 41.png )

>>713233
>>713287

You are UNABLE to WEAR the ROBOT because it is TOO SMALL for your SUPER JUMPING PHYSIQUE.

Going PAST the DISABLED ROBOT, you meet with an ELITE HELMETED DERP. It seems NONE TOO PLEASED that you SHORTED out the ROBOT.

>>713628
Shoot with gun.

Throw poop at him.

Take HELMET.

>>713628
Throw the robot at him. He's small enough it'll probably crush him.

>>713628
throw lime juice at the derp's eyeball staff

Boop with poop.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/03(Sun)16:31 No. 713660 ID: 1f8505
File 145972630590.png - (177.45KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 42.png )

>>713637

You go with THIS because it FEELS GOOD to TOSS a ROBOT on a SMALL ENEMY, much like SUPER MARIO BROS. 2.

The DISABLED ROBOT CRASHES into the ELITE HELMETED DERP, taking them BOTH OUT.

"Ow my head AND my entire body!" says the ELITE HELMETED DERP.

Isn't his head his entire body?

Man, why aren't enemies despawning after they die now? Or is the robot not technically dead, only disabled? Or was it never alive?

Anyway keep going we gotta find the evil doctor.

>>713660
Steal helmet.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/03(Sun)17:19 No. 713680 ID: 1f8505
File 145972916010.png - (76.46KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 43.png )

>>713663

The HELMET does not FIT. What a SHAME.

>>713661

You GUESS it has to do with the POORLY OPTIMIZED GAME CODE due to a RUSHED DEADLINE.

Anyways, you advance until you spy DR. TORI MYSTERIOUSLY HOVERING in the AIR inside a GLASS BUBBLE.

"Welcome, SUPER JUMPING GUY! Welcome... TO DIE!

Even DR. TORI's DIALOGUE was rushed in its TRANSLATION.

Smear poop all over his glass orb to blind him.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/03(Sun)17:21 No. 713682 ID: 1f8505
File 145972926470.png - (231.51KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 44.png )

SUDDENLY, an ENORMOUS BADLY DRAWN SUPER ROBOT appears around DR. TORI.

"BEHOLD! My SUPER ULTRA TARANTULA BOT 8000 1/2! HA HA HA HA HA!"

Things are getting SUPER SERIOUS now.

We must blind him with the poop before he pulls out the other 1/2 of his machine then!

>>713681
Still the best plan.

>>713682
Throw poop, then rapidly pause and unpause the game as it hits, so the flawed game engine incorrectly registers dozens and dozens of attacks.

Just spray Limebuster's hot juices all over it again.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/03(Sun)18:06 No. 713703 ID: 1f8505
File 145973197746.png - (236.53KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 45.png )

>>713684
>>713693

You proceed to THROW the LAST of your POO at the COCKPIT of DR. TORI.

"This is just GROSS! Ack!"

DR. TORI is BLINDED and CANNOT SEE! NOW is your CHANCE to DELIVER A FINISHING BLOW!

>>713703

You ALSO ABUSE the PAUSE SCREEN to make WAY MORE POO appear on DR. TORI'S COCKPIT.

Potato gun! Spray spud all over his robot!

Spud him good.

Stab him in his power button.

Charge your potato gun to fire a huge potato blast!

>>713703
Potatoes in the exhaust ports.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)14:33 No. 713880 ID: 1f8505
File 145980562786.png - (229.32KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 46.png )

>>713705
>>713707
>>713743
>>713744

You WHIP OUT your POTATO GUN and begin CHARGING.

"Argh! Where is the WINDSHIELD WIPER FLUID button?!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)14:36 No. 713881 ID: 1f8505
File 145980576775.png - (216.09KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 47.png )

You then UNLEASH the MIGHTY STARCHY BLAST of your POTATO GUN. An ENORMOUS CHARGED PARTICLE POTATO CRASHES into the ENORMOUS BADLY DRAWN SUPER ROBOT.

"What the HECK?!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)14:37 No. 713882 ID: 1f8505
File 145980584917.png - (238.64KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 48.png )

In a SERIES of CIRCULAR ANIME EXPLOSIONS, the ENORMOUS BADLY DRAWN SUPER ROBOT is DESTROYED.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)14:38 No. 713884 ID: 1f8505
File 145980592847.png - (163.65KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 49.png )

DR. TORI lands in FRONT of you, all while being SHOWERED with PIECES of the ENORMOUS BADLY DRAWN SUPER ROBOT. He pulls out a WHITE FLAG and waves it around.

"I surrender, SUPER JUMPING GUY."

FINISH HIM

It's a trap! I bet he's still got one more secret weapon to pull out on you.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)14:59 No. 713890 ID: 1f8505
File 145980719393.png - (164.22KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 50.png )

>>713885
>>713886

"Sorry DR. TORI, but I'm not letting you ESCAPE and return in a SEQUEL! The GAME DESIGNERS will have to come up with a NEW and BETTER ANTAGONIST!"

You STONE COLD EXECUTE DR. TORI with your POTATO GUN.

"BARF!"

DR. TORI has been DEFEATED! The DAY has been SAVED!

>>713890
So where's the credits

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)15:13 No. 713894 ID: 1f8505
File 145980803694.png - (140.20KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 51.png )

Finally, PRINCESS GIRLFRIEND appears from OFFSCREEN.

"PRINCESS GIRLFRIEND!"

"Thank you SUPER JUMPING GUY! Your QUEST is finally OVER! CONGRATULATIONS!"

Kiss the girlfriend!

Throw Limebuster juice to short out the final boss's clever disguise!

>>713894
Jump on her.

jump her(bones)

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)15:42 No. 713902 ID: 1f8505
File 145980973196.png - (140.08KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 52.png )

>>713896
>>713897
>>713898

NOPE, this is the REAL PRINCESS GIRLFRIEND. You can TELL because no one in the ENTIRE KINGDOM could EVER hope to DUPLICATE those AWESOME GAZONGAS.

>>713895

You and PRINCESS GIRLFRIEND lean in and give each other a TOTALLY AWESOME SMOOCH.

She then WHISPERS in your EAR that she wants to go to the NEAREST BROOM CLOSET for a TOTALLY HOT MAKEOUT SESSION. You say YES.

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)15:42 No. 713903 ID: 1f8505
File 145980975291.png - (197.57KB , 800x600 , super jumping guy 53.png )

(ending theme plays, credits roll)

>>713903
And then hard mode is unlocked. Twice as many enemies, half the blocks over jumps, and only accessible right after you beat the game cause the cartridge has no capacity to save and you'll lose it if you turn it off, forcing marathon play.

You're not that stupid.

Potato + Limebuster Juice + Boss Scrap = Electrical Circuit!

Anon44!lk4zOq2og2 2016/04/04(Mon)15:54 No. 713907 ID: 1f8505
File 145981046533.png - (103.52KB , 1074x956 , super jumping guy 54 end.png )

CONGLATULATIONS!!!

YOU HAVE COMPLETED A GREAT GAME! AND PROOVED THE JUSTICE OF OUR CULTURE.

BUT IT MAY BE INVADED BY THE OTHER ENEMY.

PRAY FOR A TRUE PEACE IN SPACE!

NOW GO AND REST OUR HERO!

(the end)

POTATO IN MOUTH

LIME JUICE ON CHEST

DO IT

>>713910
DO IT!

Suggestion 2016/04/04(Mon)16:09 No. 713914 ID: 02422f
File 145981138728.png - (93.42KB , 1074x956 , For Kome.png )

>>713910
>>713912
Okay.

And remember kids, the moral of the story:
anon44 is a huge nerd