Kaktus 2014/01/21(Tue)13:42 No. 558867 ID: b3ca75
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Create your character!
Please choose a gender / species combination.

Human – Same old bori- ooh, look at that beard… it’s so… magnificent. Just imagine how it would be to just borrow yourself into those smooth, silken li- Err… I mean… They are like tall dwarfs? Or something? Mmm… beard…

Lizard – How do they even survive in the coldness of the north, being cold blooded and all? Hmm…

Mantis – Ew, a bug! Step on it bef- wait… holy shit, it has a monocle! That means it’s people! All hail our new insect overlords!

(Note: All genders are valid!)

Insert Choose your champion!_

Let's go with the human female, there. Paladin Valkyrie of the North, she looks like.

>>558867
Male human.

We missed our one chance at playing a dwarf, now this is the closest we're going to get.

human female paladin go!

Female lizard. It's time to return to our roots.

>>558870
I have to agree.

If we wind up picking human female could we like, try to avoid giving her a dick this time?

Male human, with the biggest beard.

If we can't be dorfs then we'll be the closest thing to a dorf we can.

male dwarf.
wait what, oh right... human

female mantis, lay eggs on ALL the things and cut a lot of heads

Male human, that beard is magnificent.

My vote's for male lizard. Hmm, I seem to be in the minority. Oh, well.

Male human, the beard demands it.

The beard, it must be chosen

Male Beard.

beard man

A male human with not just a very large beard but loads of hair up top and everywhere else as well. Seriously, this guy looks like he's half sasquatch, half dorf.

BEARD!

Male human!

beard

eww beards. I say back to our root, liz gal

Human male, let's blend in with these northerners.

Lady lizard

Lady lizard

Kaktus 2014/01/22(Wed)05:52 No. 559021 ID: b3ca75
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>Paladin go!
You can’t choose the paladin class for this campaign. You can only play as a Windwalker champion.
>Male Beard.
You have chosen Male Beard! Unfortunately, a beard cannot survive in the wild without a human, therefore…
>Beard man.
You have chosen the mythical Beard (I AM A) MAN!! You’re the prettiest little beard of all the beards… aww, aren’t you cute?

Please configure the appearance of your human male… beard…

>Color.
Please choose the color of your beard (and hair).
1. Black. 2. Grey. 3. Dark brown. 4. Light brown. 5. Orange. 6. “Blond” (Yellow).

>Beard (Most important).
Please choose a beard style.
1. Classic. 2. A beard with a beard on the end. 3. Beardier beard. 4. Olaf style. 5. The beardies beard here. 6. Clean shaven (You monster!).

>Hair.
Please choose a hair style.
1. Classic. 2. Ponytail. 3. A hairstyle of some kind. 4. Kempt. 5. Unkempt. 6. Bald and beautiful.

>Tattoo.
Please choose a Tattoo. (You can also change color if needed.)
1. Line. 2. Wing. 3. Eagle (Caw-caw!). 4. FREEEDOOOM!! 5. None.

>Weapon.
Please choose your way to murder bad things. (Your class only permits one one-handed weapon)
1. Sword. 2. Axe. 3. Warhammer. 4. Other.

Note: All choices are purely cosmetic and for visual flavor.

Insert Huh… I’ve been able to predict to 100% which character you’re going to choose on every one of my quests… expect the whole bolt with screw thing… didn’t see that coming, honestly…_

Five for everything except the weapon.
Three for the weapon.

>a beard cannot survive in the wild without a human
We'll see about that. The quest for beard freedom has begun!

>choices
Color 3, hair 2, beards 2, tattoo 4, weapon 2 (except make it bigger, and double edged).

3 5 2 3 3

5, 5, 5, 3, and 2
orange hair, beardist beard, unkempt hair, wing tattoo, and the axe

>been able to predict which character you'd chose
Even the skeleton? :V

5,4,6,5,2

Dorf dorf dorf
I really we don't turn out to have an jamaican accent, that would be really undwarfy for our not-dwarf.

2,3,2,5,3

4, 5, 5, 5, 3

>>559021
55551

2 Grey (formerly orange)
4 The beardies beard here
2 Ponytail
4 FREEED... nope just to lazy for something more detailed.
5 Sword (and shield)

hmmmm, a mantis with a beard would be fine too...

6,5,1,5,3.
Warpaint's for posers, we'll wear the blood of our enemies and leave it where it falls.

Kaktus 2014/01/22(Wed)12:32 No. 559072 ID: b3ca75
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>Even the skeleton? :V
The joke ones (skeleton and… um… I think it was an octopus in the second one?) came from the left field too… mostly because they weren’t even on the selection screen!
>Hmmmm, a mantis with a beard would be fine too...
…Your suggestion have been taken into consideration. (Read: I’ve totally stolen your idea, chump, and no one will ever know! Muhaha!)
>The quest for beard freedom has begun!
What do we want? Free beards! When do we want them!? Um… I’m kind of busy so… next week maybe?
>5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5 and 5 for weapon.
I’ve concluded that 5 is very popular with the ladies… probably because his kick ass beard.

Color 5 (4), Beard 5 (6), hair 2 / 5 Tie (Tie breaker goes to 2) - ,Tattoo 5 (6), weapon 3 (5)
Gentlemen, Behold! The human Dorf!

Windwalker – Level 1 (Don’t expect to level up.)
Stats (These are completely pointless.)
Strength - 18
Dexterity - 10
Constitution - 24
Intelligence - 6
Wisdom - 12
Charisma - 8
Beard – 35

Special - Windwalk: You can move your body, react and swing your weapons at impossible speeds (Thus hitting harder) for a second or two at will, though this will drain your stamina at extreme speeds. Can be used until you collapse out of sheer exhaustion.

Do you want to make any last minute changes? (Clothes colors, weapon colors…)

Otherwise, please name your beard human… man, these beard jokes are getting stale…

Insert He will henceforth be known as Beard, son of Beard!_

>>559072
Can't we have a mix of 2 and 5 for hair? Ponytail but with bangs?

The skeleton was totally on the character selection screen!

>colors
Make the brown in the armor darker, change the red to purple, and the green to blue. And make the axe head like 50 to 100%. bigger. And give him backup throwing axes.

He shall be named Dan, and his beard is named Robert.

I shall call him Boe

Our "human" shall be named Urist!
Or Gimli!

Bradley, his beard is to manfab for those cliche Dwarvish names.
Or wait, is Bradford a fucking name? It sounds manlier/beardlier.

Bradford sounds nice.

Stubbs Van Burnside

Beard von beard

Kaktus 2014/01/23(Thu)08:55 No. 559146 ID: b3ca75
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>Make the brown in the armor darker, change the red to purple and the green to blue.
Your character suddenly finds himself in some new duds. Pretty slick, yo.
>And give him back up throwing axes.
He also finds two throwing axes in his pants… is he compensating for something? I mean, just look at the beard, that’s all I’m saying.
>Beard von beard.
Your beard stat isn’t high enough for such a glorious name.
>Or Gimli!
Shh, do you want us to get sued!?
>Bradford sounds nice.
Your character is now called Bradford. Also known as Bradford the savage, Bradford the bearded one and Bradford the chicken chaser.

…where are you human… where are you hiding?
(To whatever god who listens to this, whatever god that hear my prayer. I know I’m not a praying man… I do not have the tongue for it…)
We know you’re here… we can smell your fear…
(But… if you seek honor… valor… something to soothe your bloodlust. If the sound of steel dancing in red colored snow pleases you… then you will grant me one request…)
Stop cowering in fear and face us, human… we only want you to join our brotherhood…
(Grant me vengeance! Satisfy my lust for blood of these… abominations and guide my steel to whoever is responsible for these… things!
*Gurgle*!
(That is all that matters… if you will listen, then I pledge my soul if you can find it… and if you don’t… I hope you’ll burn in whatever hell you’ve created!)
Join us… let us flay your flesh from your bones and join us, living one… diseased one… broken one… join us in our ascension…

[You now have control over a very angry pile of snow… um… wait…]

Insert No, all that matters is that two stood against many_

Well now we have a necromancer running around. My suggestion? Kill all but one and see where he flees to.

Are these necromancy-raised zombies? In that case, aim for the torso. That's where the magic is. If these are Wraith-possessed corpses, you can't kill them and your best bet is to go for the legs so they can't chase you. I am also surprised you are not going insane from close proximity with a Wraith in that case.

With that in mind, perhaps you should avoid conflict with the two human zombies. They have armor. The lizards and mantis are lightly armored so you could take them out then use the opening in their ranks to run.

...shouldn't there be a second mantis somewhere? Hey, how did this happen anyway?

We have heard your prayers.

We're not quite gods, but we possess wisdom and the ability to guide those with the will to their fates. Direct power isn't so much our shtick, but we can supply that, sometimes.

The undead have a master. An intelligence or power that created them. We will help you find them.

...of course, first you must survive these lackies. Which requires either cunningly staying hidden and avoiding them, or painting the snow red.

so you call for our help... with threats... I like you already.

Anyways what do you know about the undead here and how did you end up in this mess? As for a plan of action, wait until you see the weakest point in there defense and rush it with everything you got and run right through.

Well, sorry, bubs, but the gods have gone on holiday. Instead you get us, their advising voices who have no direct divine power. Lucky you.

Okay, we only know as much about this situation as we can see around you and you tell us, so give us the deets. The quality of our advice depends on how full and honest you are about what you're facing.

You up against wraith possessed corpses, regular raised undead, or something else? I don't see any ranged enemies here, but are any of them mages?

My initial appraisal is that you can't take all of them, even with a surprise attack. You'll blow your stamina before getting through the armored ones. I say knock a hole through them and withdraw to a stronger position. That is, unless they have a ranged caster. You'll have to take that one down before running.

My tentative course of action is to wait for one to draw close, then erupt out of the snow and smash it's knees in. Then use your fury to punch a hole through their line and make a run for it. With no ranged attacks you can get away to make another ambush.

Kaktus 2014/01/23(Thu)11:38 No. 559160 ID: b3ca75
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>We have heard your prayers.
…Err… To be honest, I didn’t expect this kind of… direct answer…
>We're not quite gods, but we possess wisdom and the ability to guide those with the will to their fates.
In dark times like these I’ll accept any help I can get… of course; I do hope you mean fate as in glory and not just a pointless death.

>What do you know about the undead here?
They are different. They do not die when you destroy their chests or cut off their limbs… the only thing that seems effective is fire. Whatever harm comes to them is regenerated within an hour or two… oh, and they are smarter. They remember their past lives… yet their only goal seems to be spreading their curse to others.
>How did you end up in this mess?
I’ve sought out these lonely mountains to find whoever is responsible for this curse and slay them. I just didn’t expect fifty of these bastards coming from the forest and raiding my camp. The little sods stole all my stuff except for the hides I wear and the steel I wield.
>Are these necromancy-raised zombies?
That… I don’t know. There are a lot of natural undead in these lands thanks to all the magic, but I’ve never heard about something like this.
>If these are Wraith-possessed corpses, you can't kill them and your best bet is to go for the legs so they can't chase you. I am also surprised you are not going insane from close proximity with a Wraith in that case.
Dark spirits? Hmm… I’ve heard about them. They either use their power to play with your mind or take control over a dozen of your dead comrades to slay you with steel… but I’ve never heard about one controlling a horde like this.
>My suggestion? Kill all but one and see where he flees to.
There are too many. Either I would tire myself out long before their numbers started to dwindle or they’ll simply rush me with superior numbers.

>As for a plan of action, wait until you see the weakest point in their defense and rush it with everything you got and run right through.
>Perhaps you should avoid conflict with the two human zombies. They have armor. The lizards and mantis are lightly armored so you could take them out then use the opening in their ranks to run.
Hmm… yes… the mantis and the lady lizard is walking away from the rest of the group… leaving themselves exposed…

*Smack!*

Arhg!
HUMAN! Get him and tear his spine out!!
(I got an opening to run, but there’s at least two dozen undead after me… I’m faster than them, but they are relentless and can track me further then I can run. I’m going to need a new plan, little gods.)

Insert And thus golf was invented… or maybe cricket_

>>559160
That many? Um, I'm sorry to say this but there must be a Demon around here somewhere for there to be so many possessed corpses. You're boned. However, your death could give us some valuable insight on what fighting a Demon is like. Continue your original plan and see if you can find their leader. Maybe your special ability will be enough to take it out?

If you can't kill the Demon you're gonna have to kill yourself rather than allow it to eat your soul. Chopping your legs off to prevent your corpse from being used as a weapon would be good too.

We will need to find you a better defensive position, you need to continue on at a steady pace till we can find a better locale. Fighting the undead on plain ground alone is truly a deathtrap.

you're in the mountains right? there has to been tons of hazardous areas for you to flee to and try and use against the undead, Like a narrow cliff if you can find one, something that only 1 or 2 can walk in at a time would be best, anywhere where you could cause an avalanche also works, and if you're anywhere near water you could try and lure them out onto thin ice. (rivers work best with then ice since the water never stops flowing so it can set right)

Failing all of those, just run into the woods, loose them in the thicket, and clime a tree and just hop tree to tree until you're away from the mountain. I mean these things have to be getting power from somewhere if they can regrow limbs, I bet they get weaker the further away from the mountain the get.

Smash the mantis' shield arm and take its shield. Even if you can't wield it it is large enough to ride as a makeshift disc sled. That'll get you down snowy inclines faster than on foot.

With what you described of them I'd say your original mission was 100% fucked from the get go. Whoever is the source of these abominations undoubtedly is surrounded by them, and there's a good chance they're at least as durable as their minions. Even if you got to the mastermind, unless you were packing one hell of a magic firebomb then you would have had about as much effect on them as if you jumped off a cliff face first. In fact, it'd be even worse than that, since they'd raise your corpse as one of them.

I suggest you run into any tight grouping of trees nearby, weave between them and slow up. Let them catch up to you around the trees one or two at a time, get the jump on them, then run off. Try not to use your Windwalk power. That'll thin them out a bit.

Aim to get down to a stream or river, and keep heading downstream, away from here. You can try smacking patches of ice with your hammer to weaken them enough for your pursuers to fall through as you go.

A raging forest fire would be great right about now. You got any ideas on how to start one in your wake? You still have your flint and tinder?

Kaktus 2014/01/23(Thu)14:29 No. 559173 ID: b3ca75
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>Um, I'm sorry to say this but there must be a Demon around here somewhere for there to be so many possessed corpses. You're boned.
Pff, a daemon? Are you really calling for mommy just because of a little shadow playing pranks? Daemons have been defeated before in the old tales and we will defeat them again if they dare to come back.
>If you can't kill the Demon you're gonna have to kill yourself rather than allow it to eat your soul.
If I can’t kill it then I’ll go out kicking. I will not pussy out and do myself in. Whoever does me in will taste my hammer before I fall out of sheer spite.
>With what you described of them I'd say your original mission was 100% fucked from the get go.
And you’re just going to give up? I don’t care if I have to climb the highest of mountains, brave the wildest of rivers or fight whole armies. I will have my vengeance and even if I can’t kill them they will know of my wrath.

>We will need to find you a better defensive position, you need to continue on at a steady pace till we can find a better locale.
Hmm… while a defensive position would be good, I still think I don’t have the stamina to fight them all.
>A raging forest fire would be great right about now.
A forest fire? In the middle of the winter? Right, I’ll just light it with my fire spewing beard, now won’t I?
>Smash the mantis' shield arm and take its shield.
Got the shield… it’s rather broken but it will take a hit or two… too bad I can’t use it with my fighting style…
>You're in the mountains right? There has to been tons of hazardous areas for you to flee to and try and use against the undead.
>Aim to get down to a stream or river.
Well… I shouldn’t find a river… instead I found this deep chasm. It’s too wide to just jump over it and I’ll probably won’t die if I fall down, unless you count the likely death of being stranded with broken legs in the middle of nowhere… and it’s going to take at least ten minutes to walk around it… hmmm…

Insert I AM THE NIGHT! I AM VENGEANCE!_

>>559173
How fast can you chop down a tree and use it as a bridge?

how steep is the hill? could you maybe use the shield as a sled and gain enough speed with it to jump the gap? I mean if you can't use the shield as a shield use it as a sled at least.

Hmmm, are the undead autonomous enough to know how to climb? how to cross without just crashing themselves down into the chasm?

Sorry, didn't realize you were dead-set on a suicide run against their master. Still, you coulda planned this a bit better so it woulda been more effective. Something like a firebomb vest with an dead-man's switch ignition would have been perfect for this situation. Incinerate your corpse and the fuckers that killed you.

Okay, I think you're gonna have to sled down the slope and ramp over the chasm. Look up and down the chasm for a spot where the far side is lower and head there. Then pack some snow at the lip into a shallow ramp and head up the slope. Take a running start and jump onto the shield.

I don't suppose you're lucky enough for there to be loose packed snow, just ready to avalanche, up the slope from the chasm, are you? 'Cause it would be great to kick that off right before sledding down, catching the enemy in it as you ramp over the chasm.

So, how long has it been since these "super undead" first appeared, and how fast have their numbers been growing? Do you know where and how more of them are made? Like, can only their leader do it or are there lieutenants that can do it as well?

>little gods
Oh, I like that.

>plan
Run back up the hill, and then sled or snowboard down the slope on the shield? If you build up enough speed you can just that gap, and move a lot faster than the undead can run.

And they won't be able to duplicate the trick if their coordination or reflexes have been at all impacted by death.

Kaktus 2014/01/24(Fri)07:40 No. 559243 ID: b3ca75
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>Sorry, didn't realize you were dead-set on a suicide run against their master.
I never said I suicide. I simply stated that I might have the odds against me. I’m not stupid, I do realize I might not even be able to do this alone...
>So, how long has it been since these "super undead" first appeared, and how fast have their numbers been growing?
They started coming down from these mountains a few months ago and they’ve been growing in numbers ever since. Though, I never realized there would be these many just… roaming around up here. In fact, this almost looks like an organized raid… hmm…
>Do you know where and how more of them are made?
All I know is that they are coming from the tallest of the northern mountains, the pillars of the heavens.

>How fast can you chop down a tree and use it as a bridge?
Not fast enough. They are going to come out of the tree thicket any minute now.
>Hmmm, are the undead autonomous enough to know how to climb? how to cross without just crashing themselves down into the chasm?
They seem rather… sentient, so they are probably not just going to fall down the cliff… but… I’ve seen them do some rather physically impossible stuff so there’s always the chance they’ll just jump over, casualties be damned… hmmm…
>Run back up the hill, and then sled or snowboard down the slope on the shield? If you build up enough speed you can just that gap, and move a lot faster than the undead can run.
Hmm…

…

We know you’re here human… we can sense you!!
There! On the other side of the cliff! He used the shield to get over! Follow him! Those that fall will have to join up with us later.
…
…there are no tracks here?
No matter, spread out and search for the broken one in the woods, the human has to be hiding here somewhere… but don’t search for too long, brethren, we need to return the loot we got from the caravan to the master.

(Heh, the bastards caught the bait… hmm… Is it just me, or is the fair haired one ordering the others around? I’ve never seen the dead do that before… well, at least they don’t have my scent anymore… and the ones that didn’t make the jump is probably rather inconvenient down at the bottom of th-)
Help! By Thanes spear, somebody, please, help!
Don’t worry, brother and sisters, it’s only our friends raiding the hunting lodges around here…
(That came from further up the cliff face… never a calm moment, eh tiny gods?)

Insert Holding out for a hero! A strong and fast one fresh from the fight_

So this it the part where we try to save whoever we can and form a party to try to get back up to the top of the mountain with greater numbers where you failed alone or are we just going to grab them and run like hell away from here?

>Is it just me, or is the fair haired one ordering the others around?
It's not you. They're smart enough to have a chain of command.

>Never a calm moment, eh tiny gods?
Heh. Certainly not. We almost don't know what to do with ourselves in a calm, anymore.

You should probably investigate that attack. People in danger and all that. If nothing else, maybe there's a chance to stop the undead from further swelling their ranks.

>>559243
Let's go investigate. No other leads anyway.

Kaktus 2014/01/24(Fri)10:18 No. 559260 ID: b3ca75
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>So this it the part where we try to save whoever we can and form a party to try to get back up to the top of the mountain with greater numbers where you failed alone?
You do realize I haven’t even reached the foot of the mountain they come from, right? And I wouldn’t call meeting some opposition failure. But… it wouldn’t hurt to have someone you trust as an extra sword arm, wouldn’t it?
>It's not you. They're smart enough to have a chain of command.
Which is something to worry about….
>You should probably investigate that attack. People in danger and all that. If nothing else, maybe there's a chance to stop the undead from further swelling their ranks.
If anything, we might piss off whoever is ordering these undead around.

…

(Hmm… I can see a cabin just ahead… one of the hunting lodges the undead wa-)
HELP!! AAAH!!! –OFF!!!
Join us, lizard! Join us in our happiness!

Insert Never a dull moment_

Good thing you have those throwing axes.

Right, there's just two. Time to paint the snow red.

throw one of your axes and then comment on how that how that "happiness" thing sound like an invention to a gang rape, and how she's laying down is do anything to dispel how wrong that statement sounded. Then when they're thrown off by that comment finish them off with your hammer, or if they're the regenerating kind that don't know when to politely die, attack there legs so they can't chase you right away and there jaws so they can't yell for help.

Hit the closer one with your throwing axe, then rush in and fuck them up with your hammer.

>>559269
What.

Kaktus 2014/01/24(Fri)12:30 No. 559279 ID: b3ca75
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>Good thing you have those throwing axes. Time to paint the snow red.
Indeed it is… let them hear my steel sing.
>If they're the regenerating kind that doesn’t know when to politely die, attack their legs so they can't chase you right away and their jaws so they can't yell for help.
Or I can just cut them in half, destroying their lungs in the process.

I hope you’ll appreciate seeing my steel dance in the wind.
Broken on- *Gurgle*!
AAH!! H-holy Siegfried b-beard!
Hmm… t-they don’t *wheeze* seems so happy now, d-do they? *pant*
Y-you cut them… the tree… You cut the tree in… W-why are there t-two of you- are you standing on the s-snow!? w-who are you!? What are you!? Aaah!! Please don’t kill me!
…why wo-
I DON’T WANT TO DIE!
…

Insert Double kill_

"are you happy the zombies are dead or not?"

>>559279
Tell him to be quiet, unless he wants to attract more attention. It's an afterimage. Pick him up and find out what happened.

Hang on, is that the second time you used Windwalk? Try to save your strength for the main event, will you?

any chance of retrieving your ax?

Anyways as for the guy, Just ask him if you wanted to see him die then why would you have saved him from the zombies in the first place? I mean come on, people do sometimes help when you call for help.

Kaktus 2014/01/24(Fri)13:42 No. 559294 ID: b3ca75
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>Is that the second time you used Windwalk? Try to save your strength for the main event, will you?
I’m pretty sure the main event isn’t going to unfold today. Besides, I can recover my stamina relative quickly if I take a quick rest. But, yes, that was windwalking… wait, how do you- nevermind… minds of gods and all that… even small gods…
>Any chance of retrieving your ax?
It’s still stuck in the tree stump and it’s made to endure this kind of punishment. I’ll recovery it after I’ve dealt with the boy.

First off, if I wanted you dead I would have let the dead eat you. Second, the only thing you’re currently accomplishing with all that screaming is attracting more of those things.
Y-you’re not- but-
I’m a windwalker, I can do things that normal people can’t.
…YOU’RE A FREAKING WINDWALKER!? By the gods, I thought you guys were legends I… I…
Keep it together, boy. What happened here?
I j-just came back from checking t-the snares and… we have rune that’s supposed to keep them at bay b-but… Oh no… My Pa and little sister is still in there! I need to go an-
And what, feed the undead a bit more, boy?
I got a b-bow and arrow at the cabin I can u-use and… and I’m not a boy! I’m 17! I’m an adult fo-
Not now, boy. I can see that the door is open from here… stay here while I check it out. I rather not have an extra back to protect.
Wha- no! I’m coming with you! I’m a hunter! I know how to use a bow!
But have you ever fought someone who fights back with steel?
Err… no but… b-but… that’s my family! I have to save them!

Insert Clearly, he’s a man with a fetish for the word steel_

I don't think he's seen a windwalker, he also might either be in shock, or extreme panic after a near death event. Try and calm him.

well since the cabin is nearby tell him if he wants to help he should clime the tree behind him and act as a sentry to warn us of any more dead coming our way. If he starts bitching about that tell him that 1) he's still panicking a bit and is more likely to be a problem then a help right now 2) while we don't doubt he can use a bow if he want's to go inside the cabin he'll be in a enclosed space where bows and arrows aren't all that helpful, and 3) he's a hunter right? that means he should be good at spotting things, so he'll be best as a sentry because he can probably spot things that even you would miss and since he'd be up in a try would have plenty of space to fill things up with arrows while being a pain in the ass for any zombies to get at him to gnaw on him (unless they themselves have bows or magic, but don't tell him that part)

Hrrrm...A few thoughts here.
"Listen, kid.
I don't need another back to protect, and these undead are not easy to stop. If your family's in danger I *MIGHT* Be able to save them. But judging by what I just saw? You can't hold your own, and I'd have to save you more than you'd help.
Even if we ASSUME you can fight...Your weapon is a bow and arrow. These Undead regenerate, and well enough that I need to adjust my tactics just to do enough damage to slow the blasted monsters down, and I sliced those two in half. Unless you can do the same, I'd be better served if you stayed out of the fight, instead of having to worry about you dying and having to dodge those same arrows. This isn't a place to prove yourself a man."

>I rather not have an extra back to protect.

You're kinda stuck with him. You can't leave him out of your sight when there are zombies freaking everywhere; he'd be as toast as if you never found him. Just ask him to do something he can't mess up, like watch the door or provide information on the insides of the cabin.

Now go rend some undead.

>>559294
Arrows won't do dick against these undead. All he'll be is a distraction in combat. I guess he could serve as a lookout or an extra pair of hands, though.

Kaktus 2014/01/24(Fri)16:10 No. 559304 ID: b3ca75
File 139060864445.png - (17.51KB , 900x450 , 12.png )

>You're kinda stuck with him. You can't leave him out of your sight when there are zombies freaking everywhere; he'd be as toast as if you never found him.
Hmm… you’re right… there’s supposed to be a city somewhere in the valley. I can probably drop him off there… I needed to stop by there for supplies anyway.
>Listen, kid…
I know you want to show your mettle, but this is the not the fight to do so. These aren’t your normal undead, your arrow will be like a fart in a snowstorm against them. You’re only going to get in the way and make it harder for me to save whoever is left in there. If you want to help climb a tree or something and keep watch for more of them.
This… this isn’t about my mettle! It’s about my family! I… fine, I’ll keep watch… but I will show you I can be useful!
Just keep out of my way, boy.
I’m not a boy!

>Now go rend some undead.
Hmm… no lights?
…Big brother? Is that you?
…please don’t tell me they cursed a child.
You’re not big brother… but you can still play with me! Do wanna play with me, mister? We can have so much fun… you just need to join us… Don’t you want to be happy?
What kind of monster does this!?
…why are you angry? Does anger make you happy? Don’t you want to be happy? Think about it… no more anger… no more pain… sadness… lonlyness… stress… unhappiness… all gone. Don’t you think that sounds nice, mister…?
…

Insert To say something positive about undeath, it isn’t discriminating_

you realize that the bad things in life only enhance the good things right? Besides by the sound of things this kid only just died, how the hell does he know weather or not he can or can't feel these things, I mean that one undead who was looking for you earlier seemed to be getting pretty pissed that you got away.

Anyways, I don't like how the damn place is so dark, way to easy to walk into an ambush, think you could maybe knock a few holes in the walls to let in more light, or just knock a wall down in general. Cause I can see something behind the kid, not sure if it's just a severed head or another undead though and I think I can see something in the space on the opposite side of the cabin, not sure what but I think it might be a mantis. Oh and if you do knock down the wall make sure it's on the part of the building with no windows/light so we can see what's inside.

It's tough to see in the dark, but there's a head on a table behind the girl. There's also some kind of lizard-shaped thing in the other direction, but I have no idea if it's undead or a suit of armor or the father or what. If you have any way to improve the lighting, you should do it.

And yes, lies usually sound very nice.

>>559304
There's someone else hiding in there, in full armor. To your right.

So don't go in. Make them come out to you.

Kaktus 2014/01/24(Fri)17:20 No. 559310 ID: b3ca75
File 139061284169.png - (19.73KB , 900x450 , 13.png )

>yes, lies usually sound very nice.
Verbal shit usually smell nicer then the real deal, yes.
>There's someone else hiding in there, in full armor. To your right.
If only I had some light…
>Think you could maybe knock a few holes in the walls to let in more light, or just knock a wall down in general?
Hmm… these walls seems rather sturdy…

>If you have any way to improve the lighting, you should do it.
Hey, kid, do you have a latern o- Did you just light a fire in front of th-
*Tock*
Eek!! FIRE! FIRE!!
…huh, they are rather flammable, no?
No! Not uncle tin can! Die human!!

Insert At least it didn’t hit his knee_

if the kid is going to try and kill you, let them come to you. because try to swing a hammer through a door way is a bitch.

Then grab some of the wood from the fireplace and use mister tin can's flame to light it and explore the upper rooms

Well that was rather impressive aim! He's better then we thought, and it seems that with slightly more mind to them they still fear fire, either because they take more damage to it, or they remember it's pain fully.

Either way, can we get more fire in here?

>>559310
I think you can easily kill them all now.

no more stress or unhappiness eh?
Step back, wait for child to charge, and then clock head clean off!
Also: Points to the hunter kid! I really did think he should have gotten out of dodge there for a bit.

When the kid charges you trip him up so he crashes into the flaming uncle.

>I’m not a boy!
Sorry, lass. Tough to tell with you lizards, what with the lack of breasts and beards.

Still, going to be a bit awkward to tell someone you had to put down their zombified family.

Kaktus 2014/01/25(Sat)05:08 No. 559388 ID: b3ca75
File 139065530246.png - (19.33KB , 900x450 , 14.png )

>Sorry, lass. Tough to tell with you lizards, what with the lack of breasts and beards.
Lass? That’s quite clearly a boy. He’s just mad that I’m referring to him as a child… which he is.
>When the kid charges you trip him up so he crashes into the flaming uncle.
Or I can just pick her up and throw her in. Even with the improved strength of undeath she’s still an unarmed little girl.
EEE!! FIRE BAD, FIRE BAD!!!
>I think you can easily kill them all now.
And burn their corpses for good measure. I’ll burn the one who hasn’t risen yet too, just to be sure.

>Then grab some of the wood from the fireplace and use mister tin can's flame to light it.
Hmm… the wood in the fireplace is drenched in water. Did the undead snuff the light? Never mind, I’ll just grab some wood from somewhere else.
>explore the upper rooms.
The only thing of note I found was a broken window and a discarded crossbow bolt. Going by the blood on the bolt and the wound on the little girl I’m guessing this is what killed her… hmm… the bolt has some kind of weird green liquid on it…

>Still, going to be a bit awkward to tell someone you had to put down their zombified family.
I’ve cleared out all the rooms… All the undead has been dealt with… um… I’m guessing that was your Pa and sister?
…yes… yes it was… I… I… someone had smashed the rune of protection… how did they get to it? It’s supposed to keep them at bay…
…Are you feeling alright, boy?
…stop calling me boy, old man.
…you do realize the house you’re standing in is on fire, right?
… … …why us?
Huh?
Why did they attack us? We don’t have anything they want…

Insert Well, you do have a lot of that fresh, succulent flesh of yours… mmm… lizard flesh *Drools*_

To these undead, they don't care that you have anything. You as a person is what they want, they want to swell their ranks, to grow more and destroy more.

Apparently they are recruiting, and they are using ranged weaponry infected with some new poison or plague. Keep a sample of it to bring to an alchemist it might be vital to figure out what they are using.

1. show him the bolt.
We dunno what it is, but it's probably something the undead used.
As for why? Soldiers. This kid's actually a good shot-his father was probably a skilled fighter given the armor and weapon, and even the sister found a way to contribute-what's to say the whole town didn't have people like that?

As far as the rune of protection...Where was the thing? Right in the center of town or so?

think they're just trying to swell there numbers to build an army or something, no idea why though. Also I think they fired some kind of toxic bolt into your sister killing and turning her and had her smash the rune.

>He’s just mad that I’m referring to him as a child… which he is.
That may be true, but it's certainly not going to help the situation to aggravate him needlessly. And one way or another, his childhood ended today anyways.

>We don’t have anything they want
You had yourselves. As far as I've seen, all these creatures want is to kill and make more of themselves.

Kaktus 2014/01/25(Sat)09:54 No. 559415 ID: b3ca75
File 139067247597.png - (22.35KB , 900x450 , 15.png )

>the whole town.
…it’s one cabin. I would hardly call one house a town.
>As far as the rune of protection...Where was the thing?
I think I saw it in the hall just up the stairs.
>Apparently they are recruiting.
-and I don’t know why, but they seem to be building an army.
An army? We weren’t soldiers, we were just a family of hunters…
>This kid's actually a good shot.
…really? Because that shot you just made was rather impressive. Hell, how did you even know he was there?
Err… I didn’t? You said he was there, remember?
…I didn’t utter a word, bo- brother.
…then who is it that I’m hearing whispering since I met you?

>his father was probably a skilled fighter given the armor and weapon.
There it was again and… um… my father didn’t own any armor… I think you’re confusing my father with the undead paladin that was in here, mysterious voice… my father was… he… I…
He was the headless one, yes?
…y-yes.
>Show him the bolt. I think they fired some kind of toxic bolt into your sister killing and turning her and had her smash the rune.
I… I’ve never seen the dead use a ranged weapon before…
I’m pretty sure they can’t. They can barely use their melee weapons as it is.

>Keep a sample of it to bring to an alchemist it might be vital to figure out what they are using.
We should take it to the closes city. The road isn’t far from here and it’s probably an hour on foot from there.
We?
…Um… there isn’t a lot of other places out here… so I just assumed… err…
I was heading there anyway… might just as well suffer your presence a while longer.
Oh… um… I… I need to grab some stuff and… err…
You better hurry, the house is going to start to burn any second now.
Right… err… Who are these voices? …and you? Who are you?
They are tiny gods that have come to guide me to my vengeance… me, Bradford the savage, Windwalker.
Oh… um… I’m V-Vladimir and… I’m a h-hunter… I guess?
…I have to admit, you’re taking your loss rather gracefully.
…I… I don’t have time to cry right now, right… I… I need to get somewhere safe then… I… I can slaughter some of them as revenge or cry my eyes out or… or… or something! I don’t know! I… I just can’t… not now…

[You have gained a new pawn: “The hunter”!]

Insert Oh, look at that pretty fire_

yeah we gained a new friend. Anyways Vlad hurry and grab what you need because the fire is starting to spread. Oh and uh, sorry for you loss really wish we could have met under better circumstances.

Alright so Brad, The plan is just to run to town, hope the undead haven't ransacked the place yet and try to figure out what the hell we're dealing with before trying to force our way up the mountain again or did you have something else in mind?

Oh, Vlad can hear us?

We're sorry for what happened to your family, and that we arrived too late to help. We'll try and guide you to your safety, or vengeance, or whatever it is you seek, if you'll let us.

You're right that you don't have time to mourn now, though.

Gather what you need from the house, quickly. Before the flames engulf it, or we attract more of the corrupted dead.

>>559415
Oh, I know who fired the arrow. They have living cultists on their side. We met some in the south.

So keep an eye out for archers. Oh. Kick that head into the fire too.

Kaktus 2014/01/25(Sat)11:48 No. 559439 ID: b3ca75
File 139067932758.png - (23.19KB , 900x450 , 16.png )

>We're sorry for what happened to your family, and that we arrived too late to help.
Let’s… let’s just get away from here, a-alright?
>We'll try and guide you to your safety, or vengeance, or whatever it is you seek, if you'll let us.
….I… I don’t really… what do I want? …um… happiness?
>Oh, I know who fired the arrow. They have living cultists on their side.
Finally, some normal skulls to bash in!
…you’re way to enthusiastic about that.
>Gather what you need from the house, quickly. Before the flames engulf it, or we attract more of the corrupted dead.
Don’t worry, most of the stuff is already p-packed. Mostly survival stuff and clothes… um… and my grandfather’s magical quiver… he used to be an adventurer and… let’s just say this thing saved us a fortune on the fletcher. I think… I think you’re supposed to be able to make fire arrows from this thing too…

>The plan is just to run to town, hope the undead haven't ransacked the place yet and try to figure out what the hell we're dealing with before trying to force our way up the mountain again or did you have something else in mind?
I haven’t really planned further then getting to town. We’ll see where we end up… and who’s going to hear my steel sing…

Here’s the road… now we only need to follow it in that direction.
…the same direction as that pillar of smoke?
Err… yes… good news is that It’s too close to be from the town but… bad news is t-that’s it’s definitely coming from further up the road. What do we do?
Oh, I do hope it’s cultist… I’ve been looking forward to cleave some living skulls for a while…

Insert Smoke on the water… snow is water, right?_

>>559439
What's that glowing on the mountaintop?

I say scout it out, but remain unseen. It may just be a burning pile of undead corpses.

there's also something on top of the mountain but village first, mountain second, we need more hands to help us get there anyways

I don't suppose anyone has keen enough eyes to make out the light on the mountain? Or binoculars, or telescope?

I'd suggest approaching the smoke carefully. We don't know what's there, or how many. Remember, these dead can sense the living, and you don't want to be in a fight too big too handle again.

Kaktus 2014/01/25(Sat)14:07 No. 559455 ID: b3ca75
File 139068767652.png - (33.30KB , 900x450 , 17.png )

>What's that glowing on the mountaintop?
It’s been coming and going for months now… no one seems to know what it is.
>Remember, these dead can sense the living, and you don't want to be in a fight too big too handle again.
Oh, r-right… here, this amulet will hide your soul from the dead… err… I think.
You think?
They were designed for the mindless undead so… just remember they can still see you normally… I and Pa used to… used… they work, aright…

>I say scout it out, but remain unseen. It may just be a burning pile of undead corpses.
The smell says its corpses and… other things… lot of different things. Hmm, a caravan?

Come on, Alexandra! Get moving! Who knows when the dead come back?
Hey, how do you expect me to carry all this!? Why can’t you put some of my stuff on the spider too?
Because it can’t carry that much! Just be happy the dead didn’t eat all the spiders.
Then why is it just your stuff on it?
Because it’s more expensive! …not to say fragile. The only thing you got that weight anything is the makeup and perfume! Just dump it, I say!
You know how important this stuff is for me, Jal. Just as important as your alchemy stuff is to you.
How about this… the one who killed the most undead gets the spider. I killed at least four of them when I fire bombed the cart in front of us. You only killed one with your “holy” magic. So, I win, I get the spider.
Might I remind you that the one I killed was about to take a bit out of your fat abdomen!? And if it wasn’t for me practicing my undead repellent rites when that horde of undead came we would have been sharing fate with the cart in front of us.
We were lucky they found some other poor sod to chase instead of standing around here… but can’t you just carry it? We can’t be far from town!
It’s heavy, alright! Besides, a proper lady doesn’t go around the wilderness ca-
You? A proper lady? Allow me to laugh! Ha!

Insert Wait, you’re serious!? Allow me to laugh harder!_

That 'poor sod' as you call him, is here, and while probably dissapointed at more survivors as opposed to the living cultists he was hoping for, I'm sure the ward-like aqquisition to the party, the young lizard ranger will be happy to meet other fellows.
Or perhaps instead of being round-about, let me just introduce you!
The poor sod=Bradford the Savage, Windwalker. He's actually awesome.
lizard ranger=Vladimir the Impaler-actually no. He hasn't earned a cool nickname yet, but he's a good shot.
Could you be so kind as to give your names?

Hm, a holy man and an alchemist, how handy. More eyes is better to watch each others backs with.

Alright guys, I think you should help these travelers move their stuff to town.

I'm afraid this is no time for petty infighting, or worrying about personal possessions.

Kaktus 2014/01/25(Sat)16:46 No. 559487 ID: 549d6c
File 139069716313.png - (33.98KB , 900x450 , 18.png )

>Could you be so kind as to give your names?
…
I don’t think they can hear you… but going from their conservation… The lizard gal is named Alexandra and the Mantis lad is called Jal.
>While probably disappointed at more survivors as opposed to the living cultists he was hoping for…
Ah yes… My hammer longs for the taste of living blood.
…right, getting a bit creepy there, wind man.

>Hm, a holy man and an alchemist, how handy. More eyes are better to watch each other’s backs with.
Hail, learned one and priestess. Are you on your way to the town?
Priestess? Oh, not yet…
Hail, fellow traveler. Yes, we are indeed on our way to Ängladal. Do you care to join us?
The more the merrier…
>I'm afraid this is no time for petty infighting, or worrying about personal possessions.
-because there’s might still undead nearby, r-right?
Being the poor sod they chased off I can attest that they are still wandering around out here.
Oh, but with you here the problem is already solved! I mean… I’m sure two strong looking men like you can easily help me carry some of my possessions for little old me… oh, I would be so… grateful~
…remove your hands from my chest or I’ll remove them from your wrists.
Geez, who shoved a stick up your butt?
You’ll have to excuse Alexandra here but… she believes flirting will solve most things.
You don’t need to be mad just because I was gifted with feminine charms…
Feminine charms, my abdomen.
>Alright guys, I think you should help these travelers move their stuff to town.
Um… actually… I think I can carry it if you want…
Really? Why, thank you, big boy… I’m sure I’ll find a way to reward you, handsome~
Oh, please…
*Off* I-It’s rather… heavy, isn’t’ *nng* it?
I’m sure a well-trained outdoors man like you won’t have any problem at all, cutie.
*Ngg* Y-y-yes, of c-course… err…
Now, onwards!
Err… are you sure the boy can carr-
I’m not a boy! …And I’m *wheeze* fine… I… I just need… just need to get a better grip… that’s all… *pant*…

Insert if you know what I mean_

>>559487
Vlad, don't hurt yourself. You need to be battle-ready. Ask Alex to take one side of it. Two people on one chest. Uh, once you get it down from there, anyway. Bradford, you might have to help him get it down from there.

Vlad, overexerting or exhausting yourself won't help anything. You'll need to divide that load up, some.

Actually while vlad is up there trying to get that chest down, show the alchemist the substance you found on the bolt. See if he can figure it out from a cursory glance.

Vlad your in the damn snow, can't you find a piece of wood from the wreaked caravan and some rope and use the makeshift sled to carry the chick's heavy crap? No need to do more work when there's a simpler and easier way to do things.

But yeah while we're walking to town might as well see what the bug knows about the stuff on the bolt we found and maybe ask him how many firebombs he has left incase we do end up in another fight before we make it back to town.

Kaktus 2014/01/26(Sun)04:05 No. 559553 ID: 549d6c
File 139073792423.png - (26.31KB , 900x450 , 19.png )

>Vlad you’re in the damn snow, can't you find a piece of wood from the wreaked caravan and some rope and use the makeshift sled to carry the chick's heavy crap?
(Um… that would work, yes…) There we go, a nice sled for your chest, madam.
Just be careful with my stuff, sweetie.
>Ask him how many firebombs he has left.
Well… none. But I do have the ingredients to mix up a cocktail real quick in a hurry… of course, I rather not burn away all my salves before I even get to the city.
>Show the alchemist the substance you found on the bolt. See if he can figure it out from a cursory glance.
Hmm… you said this supposedly made someone undead? I’m going to need my equipment for anything definite, but I’ll take a small sample now for later testing. I suggest you show it to the order of light when we get to the city, though, they know a lot of the dead around here.
The who?
The order of light? The light bringers? The anti-undead group? They have a sanctuary built in Ängladal just right up ahead… in fact; I heard the Arch-Bishop of their order himself is there right now!
Err… you remember that… armored undead I burned? The one with a sun on his chest? That was probably a paladin of their order who’s fallen in battle.

Well then, gents, what bring you do these lonely mountains? I’m here to make use of all the amazing ingredients and interesting mixtures you can find here for my alchemy research, myself.
I’m here to join with the order of light as an healer…
…Vengeance, against whoever is creating these undead.
Vengeance? You should do good to remember the story about Richard Mobey and his hunt for the albino troll... and you, young man, why are you here?
Um… well… I live… I used to live here…
Used to? You just moved out?
My Pa and sister was eaten by the undead while my house burned down twenty minutes ago.
I… Oh… that’s… I’m sorry, I didn’t… err… maybe I should pull the sled for a while…
It’s… it’s fine… I can pull it, no problem… it doesn’t matter anyway… I can see the roof of some of the taller houses already.
Ah… finally some good news… oh, and sorry for your loss, young man…
Err… guys… I think I see a bunch of undead hiding among the trees just up the road… I don’t think they’ve seen us yet but… they seem to be watching the town…

Insert Richard is kind of a dick, right Ishmael?_

We should get in, alert the town watch and the paladins. A well prepared defensive force is far better then a scattered panicked defense force trying to get its ass in gear. Double time folks!

whoooa guys hold up a second. Undead in front of us we're going to need to bypass, and thanks to the supplies of the holy lady Alex and Alchemist Jai, sneaking ain't happening, not without leaving those behind...
Soo here's what I'm thinking, and this depends on how many undead are out there.
if there's like 10 or so of em I think we can take em. But if there's enough to viably siege the town? We're gonna need a plan...
Here's what I got so far.
Brad&Alex, your job is defense, holy ward the caravan, beat down anything that comes close, just keep the undead at bay.
Vlad, Jai, you're the offense-your abilities are better suited for killing the undead outright.

Kaktus 2014/01/26(Sun)10:14 No. 559575 ID: 549d6c
File 139076007533.png - (48.75KB , 900x450 , 20.png )

>Thanks to the supplies of the holy lady Alex and Alchemist Jai, sneaking ain't happening, not without leaving those behind...
Yeah, I’m not leaving my stuff behind.
Can’t we just walk around them? You know this isn’t a 2d world after all…
>We should get in, alert the town watch and the paladins.
They seem rather alert already… I can see them patrol on the stonewall around the city… but I don’t think they’ve seen these undead yet.
Stone wall? I haven’t read anything about this village having a stone wall.
It didn’t before the order came six months ago. It’s grown a lot since then.

>If there's like 10 or so of ‘em I think we can take ‘em.
I can count ten of them… sitting there in the snow… spread out in a straight line…
I for one vote that we go around them. I’m a lady, not a fighter.
I have to agree, I rather avoid getting wounded if possible.
Bah, stop sucking your mother teats. The less undead the better, I say.
Yeah! Let’s crush some skulls!
I… I rather see them dead then have them destroy someone else’s life. Hmm… but why are they just sitting there in the snow?
They are taking a rest?
They are dead, they don’t need to rest. They are probably just waiting to ambush someone.
Maybe they are spies!? Trying to find weaknesses in the city’s defenses!
Hmm… did you see someone with a sun on their chest?
You mean someone in the order? I don’t think so, why?
Just a thought I had.
So… between the four of us, two voted for going around and three voted for killing them, so… wait… that doesn’t add up…
Raid the caravan at all costs… raid caravan all costs…

Insert 2+2=5… there are five lights… five!_

You picked up a spare somehow. However she clearly is not undead so her vote definately counts. CHARGE!

If they're all grouped togather like that couldn't you just get rid of all of them with one well place firebomb?

Also who the hell is the lady and where the hell did she come from?

>Anna
...wait, where do you come from? You only got one vote at character creation!

As much as Bradford and Pally there might want to smash the undead themselves, I think the burning tree idea is a good one.
Vlad, set the tree on fire, then them when they come for us.
Brad, Pally, Alex, the three of you can ward them off/smash them down, Jai, your supplies are limited-let's save them for the town.

Kaktus 2014/01/26(Sun)11:21 No. 559591 ID: 549d6c
File 139076411655.png - (50.62KB , 900x450 , 21.png )

>...wait, where did you come from?
Who in the name of Hel are you!?
Oh, hi guys! I’m Ann-Sofie, soon to be paladin in training and I saw you guys were about to crack some skulls so I decided to join the fun!
Wait, weren’t you on the same caravan we came with?
That’s right... and these undead were some of the one who attacked us. At least, they are the ones who chased after the four carts who manage to escape the initial attack. Don’t know what happened to the carts that was left behind.
One of them was lost, the other one was protected by Alex her-
Alexandra.
-Alexandra here thus saving our lives.
Well, that’s some good news… now let’s start cracking skulls!

>Vlad, set the tree on fire.
…it doesn’t really want to catch fire…
Hey, what are you doing!? If you burn them now we can’t collect their still beating hearts!
…Why would you want to collect their still beating hearts? Also… Ew…
Because the Order pays you like… five crows for each heart. They say it’s were all the evil magic is and stuff and they want to burn it and stuff… so five crows as proof that you killed one of the unbroken ones.
…sounds like fun… but… um… why are they still just standing there even though they are starting to catch fire?
>However she clearly is not undead so her vote definitely counts. CHARGE!
They don’t even react?
…maybe they are broken? Try to restart them! Maybe you should blow in their cartridges a few times!
Again… ew…
For some reason this is rather disappointing…
Raid… caravan… raid…

Insert They probably played too much video games… or read to many quests. Quests makes you a brainless zombie! They are the devil! Censor all quests!_

>hyperactive overeager trainie paladin skullcracker stillbeatingheart-collecter rewardseeker
You'll fit in just wonderfully.

>collect hearts
These are wraith-based undead, though. Their power isn't in a heart / core you can destroy or remove. The only effective countermeasure is to destroy the body completely.

>not moving
Well, might as well take advantage of that. Either chop them up or just head to town.

huh, these undead must be programmed only to attack caravans... I'm also noticing a bubble just right of the leaves of the tree we just lit on fire, also now that I see that I'm also noticing some kind of wall? I mean right in front of the zombies the light changes somewhat. Think they might be at the edge of the towns anti-undead ruin thing.

Yeah, be careful of that light wall.

>>559591
They were given specific instructions to wait here for the caravan, but the other undead got to it first.

You just found a critical flaw in how these undead work! They only follow orders. Or maybe it's just one particular type of zombie. The ones that were chasing you seemed to be able to think for themselves just fine. Maybe open-ended tasks allow them to make decisions, but strict orders don't? Or maybe there's two groups of undead.

Regardless, chop these up so we can get to town. Oh, ask what happened to the other four carts.

Maybe failing to properly complete their objective broke them?

Kaktus 2014/01/26(Sun)13:49 No. 559604 ID: 549d6c
File 139077299381.png - (52.26KB , 900x450 , 22.png )

>Maybe there's two groups of undead.
Well, we did meet one that was barking orders to the rest… hmmm…
>These are wraith-based undead, though. Their power isn't in a heart / core you can destroy or remove. The only effective countermeasure is to destroy the body completely.
Actually, according to my pamphlet from the order of light it’s the heart that is the nexus of all the healing thingy… err… well, it’s more of a vessel of the dark magic but… burn it and they die, if you get my drift. Pull it out and they can’t really do anything before they start re-growing from the heart.
Hmmm, now when you mention it, all the parts that isn’t connected to their torso stops moving. Let’s try it out, shall we?
*Slorp!*
…err… right, while that was kind of cool and all… when I said pull it out I didn’t mean with your bare hands.
Ugh, I think I’m going to be s-sick!
It’s just a heart, Jal… but yeah, ew guys…
Well, at least you proved that Sofia was right. The body just collapsed and the heart is still beating.

>Yeah, be careful of that light wall.
>Think they might be at the edge of the towns anti-undead rune thing.
Don’t worry, that’s just the anti-undead wall. That’s why they couldn’t follow the caravan.
I p-passed some towns with those k-kind of runes on the way here… but never could you see it l-like this. It’s either very powerful runes or a lot of runes. Ugh… I think I n-need to sit down…
It’s both.
>Well, might as well take advantage of them not moving.
So… two heart each, eh? Ten crows on a silver platter… I can’t complain, but I hoped for more of a fight.
Don’t look a gift spider in the mouth, Mr. Beard.

Halt! Who goes there!? What is your business here and… is that a bunch of the undead you’re frolicking with?
We’re just harvesting some hearts.
…right, I still need to know why you’ve come to Ängladal and see your papers, please.
Err… papers?
What papers?
The papers you must have to enter the city.

Insert Glory to Arstotzka_

We've come to Ängladal for shelter and defense against the hordes of roving dead.

As for papers, the lad is a local resident, and the Pally is one of yours. Can they get us in?

Uhhh...Shoot.
And if we don't happen to have said papers, where can we go get them?

>>559604
Ask if this is a recent development. Surely there are exceptions for caravans that left before papers were a requirement? Or do we just have to check in with someone to get said papers?

Huh, Brad came to town to figure out a new way to get to the top of the mountain after being chased off by overwhelming numbers of undead, Vlad's family was just taken by the undead along with his home so he's coming to town because he has no where else to go, Alex and the bug were part of a caravan that was attacked so there just trying to get somewhere where they don't have to worry about more undead, and the blond wants to join your order. And you're telling us that none of this is possible without papers?

THE HELL MAN!?

If they need to know who we are than the other members of the caravan can vouch for us, or at least for those two.

Tell them your reasons for entering Ängladal, but the others here will have to speak for their reasons themselves.

Check with Vlad if this is legit for real. If he or his family were here relatively recently they'll know about it. Heck, he might even have entry papers himself.

Ask the paladins why Ängladal even needs entry documents, what they indicate, and where you're supposed to get them.

Didn't the caravan enter the town? 'Cause if it did then it has the proper papers, and as Anna, Alexandra and Jal were all riding on it then they ought to have permission to enter as part of it. The paladins just have to get whoever was in charge of the caravan to have a look at them and vouch they are part of the caravan.

Hey, is that round lighter area in the anti-undead field a part of it or am I seeing a really big light from somewhere over the tree line or the mountains?

Also, don't bring that coated bolt through the anti-undead field. It's necromantic nature might mean it'll be fried by the field. Either hide it for later examination or get Jal to test it before entering the town.

Oh, and don't forget to ask to get paid the bounty for the hearts before entering. You pretty much have to since the hearts will go "poof" if you take them into the field.

Kaktus 2014/01/27(Mon)09:02 No. 559702 ID: 549d6c
File 139084214876.png - (12.36KB , 900x450 , 23.png )

>We've come to Ängladal for shelter and defense against the hordes of roving dead.
Most people are in these dark times.
>Ask if this is a recent development.
Indeed, we only initiated this system just over a week ago.
Oh right… I remember Pa complained about… it…
>Ask the paladins why Ängladal even needs entry documents.
Because the undead has living allies… and even worse masters. It’s simply for safety.
>Oh, and don't forget to ask to get paid the bounty for the hearts before entering. You pretty much have to since the hearts will go "poof" if you take them into the field.
Actually, no. That’s not how the undead repellant field works. Undead can’t willfully pass the border of it and any undead who manage to enter will simply stop… well, functioning. So the heart will still exist, it will just not regrow it’s body… and stop beating.
Thank the gods, that infernal beating is starting to drive me mad!
>And if we don't happen to have said papers, where can we go get them?
You can do the procedure here. You’ll need to fill out a form and conduct a small interview one and one. If you’ll follow me.
>Don't bring that coated bolt through the anti-undead field.
What is that!?
Err… a bolt with some kind of… undead creating stuff? We got it from… err… one of the undead.
I need to secure that immediately. Those things are illegal! I hope you have a valid excuse why you have this…

…

Your story about the bolt have been taken into consideration and will be compared with what the others say. Now, please, fill out this form.
Err… can’t we take it orally?
…if you wish. Name?
Bradford.
… … …and last name?
Um… v-von… beard?
… … …right, city of birth?
…err…
…age? Mothers name? Fathers name? Siblings? Profession? Reason of entry? Favorite color? Relationships? Offspring? The flight velocity of an unleaded swallow? Do you know anyone in town? Have you ever been here before?
Err… I… I can’t remember?
…you can’t remember?
I… I came here seeking vengeance against the undead… they… they took everything I had… including a part of me… I awoke in a burned out village surrounded by the undead without the knowledge who I am or where I was.
…they took your memory?
Psst… the test came back… he’s *Mumble*Mumble*
…he’s wha- yes, of course…they took a part of your s- memory… yes… Hmm… you know… there’s no way we can grant you papers with this kind of… well, lack of information.
So… you’re just going to kick me out?
Of course not. We’re willing to make a deal, so to speak. We’re interested in your… err… memory loss… so, if you want access to the city you’ll simply have to agree on three things. To join our order, to willingly be infused with a tracking device and… do some test conserving your… memory loss… does that sound fair?
…I don’t like the way you paused every time you said memory loss.

Insert What is your quest?_

alright I have 3 questions too.

1) If I joined what are the odds of me going to the top of the mountain to smite some undead bastards
2) Seeing as I'm going to be given a tracking device because I'm a security risk are there going to be any other things that are going to make me be treated differently then others in the town
3) Why can't you tell me what the damn test results where?

Soul. He was going to say part of your soul. Now what would the undead need with a partial soul of a wind walker?

>undead hearts 'die' inside the town, stop beating
...then how do you know they're undead hearts? And that no one collecting hearts for the bounty is a simple murderer or grave robber?

>I hope you have a valid excuse why you have this
Science!

No, seriously, we just thought it might be important to know how it works. That's kind of the first step in some kind of defense, or vaccination, or cure. Can you pass that on to the holy research types?

>three conditions
I'd have conditions of my own.

The first being that you speak honestly and stop clumsily lying to me. I will not ally myself with liars or cowards or fools. If you recognize what has been done to me, then say so, unless you wish me to beat the truth out of you.

And I cannot in good conscience swear any kind of oath to an order I know little to nothing about. I can pledge to help you defend this town and it's people, but more than that will take time.

Tell him that he's an inept liar and you won't join an order that isn't honest with you. You can handle the truth, so he better lay it all out for you.

Say the tracker and being tested and studied is fine, since you want to get to the bottom of what happened to you as well, but you do want to know about the Order of Light and what joining their order entails before signing up. You'll probably join anyway, since their goals seem to be in line with yourse, but making double sure of that is sensible. You'd probably want to know how long after joining it'll be before you're back out there busting undead heads in.

Kaktus 2014/01/27(Mon)12:49 No. 559737 ID: 549d6c
File 139085575164.png - (12.22KB , 900x450 , 24.png )

>...then how do you know they're undead hearts?
We have ways to tell, don’t you worry… besides, we can just take them outside the shield and watch them start beating again. I said it made the undead stop function, not kill them.
>Science! No, seriously, we just thought it might be important to know how it works. Can you pass that on to the holy research types?
It’s already being delivered to our alchemists and if your story about this Vladimir and his family is true then you might even be rewarded for your ingenuity.
>Tell him that he's an inept liar.
Liar? I’m simply withholding some information, not lying.

>I will not ally myself with liars, cowards or fools. If you recognize what has been done to me, then say so, unless you wish me to beat the truth out of you.
…Do I have to remind you that we are two heavily armed and armored soldiers while you’re unarmed?
*Whisper*
…he did what with his bare hands!? I… well; I guess you can’t be unarmed when you’re a weapon yourself, eh? But I am sorry; I’m not the right person to ask about your condition. Hell, I’m not even sure it’s the right diagnose. It’s fully possible that there been some mistake somewhere down the line. If you really want to know you have to ask the doctor we have who’s researching it. All I can tell you is that they did some really bad things about you and… err… well, you’re awfully… functional for what has maybe happened to you.
>Soul. He was going to say part of your soul.
Um… yes… kind off… It’s more like… shattered… or broken.

>I cannot in good conscience swear any kind of oath to an order I know little to nothing about.
The only oath I can swear is to slaughter these undead bastards and defend whoever they are preying on.
That’s good enough for me.
>If I joined what are the odds of me going to the top of the mountain to smite some undead bastards.
Well, you’re going to smite undead bastards, alright. But going up there? Um… let’s just say we aren’t keen to send people on suicide missions just like that.
>You'd probably want to know how long after joining it'll be before you're back out there busting undead heads in.
With your skills, as soon as we find some undead for you to bash, probably.
>Are there going to be any other things that are going to make me be treated differently than others in the town.
Um… you aren’t allowed to leave the city without supervision…
…so I’m in a cage?
Please understand, it’s a cage to protect you from the undead. They have a… certain interest in broken ones like you. Now, if you want to join, please sign this and you’ll receive your 15 crows starting bonus, plus ten for the hearts. If you want a bed or some simple food visit the barracks… or the inn if you want a real bed in your own room and real food, but it will cost you. Speaking of the inn, I’m going to take a wild guess and say your friends is probably there right now; it is generally the first place you visit. Any more questions?

Insert Can you have sex with it?_

eh sure why not, the cage thing is kinda bullshit but might as well see how the gang is doing, and money is always nice

Getting paid to do what you were gonna do anyway and having the support of the Order of Light in doing it? Hell, yeah, you're gonna sign up! Leaving aside the mandatory escort, this is about the best deal you could get in this situation.

Now that you're an initiate does any gear come with that, and who do you report to to pick it up? The chapter quartermaster? Maybe they have an Order medallion you could pin to your beard.

Is there anybody in town that could talk to Vlad and help him through it when the realization of his situation really hits?

Oh, and does the Order hire archers from outside their ranks? 'Cause Vlad could be one for the Order.

Since you got a little extra cash head on over to the inn. I bet it'll feel good to eat a nice hot meal and sleep in a real bed after what you've been through.

>so I’m in a cage?
They're worried about the undead finishing what they started, or turning the crazy dangerous windwalker into one of their own.

Since you don't want that to happen yourself, you should be fine accepting their help.

...and besides. If you really wanted out, it's not as if they could stop you, anyways.

>agree
Sign the papers and be done with it. (Try not to bisect the page with the pen).

Kaktus 2014/01/28(Tue)02:07 No. 559830 ID: 549d6c
File 139090365316.png - (30.82KB , 900x450 , 25.png )

>If you really wanted out, it's not as if they could stop you, anyways.
It is more of a cage to keep out the dead, isn’t it?
>Getting paid to do what you were gonna do anyway and having the support of the Order of Light in doing it? Hell, yeah, you're gonna sign up!
Hmm… well, they extra help would come in handy… and you don’t say no to some free money.

>Now that you're an initiate does any gear come with that, and who do you report to to pick it up? Maybe they have an Order medallion you could pin to your beard.
I would advise you to keep your old gear, it’s probably in better quality then the stuff we give to the rookies. But report to cathedral in the middle of the city and they’ll give you our official seal and whatever mission we have at hand. You can’t miss it. The cathedral, that is.
>Is there anybody in town that could talk to Vlad and help him through it when the realization of his situation really hits?
I am sorry to say, but sanity is in low supply these days. We already spread thin enough keeping more important people sane then a lonely hunter. There might be someone working privately, but they’ll be expensive at a time like this.
>Does the Order hire archers from outside their ranks?
We accept everyone who are willing to help.
>Sign the papers and be done with it. (Try not to bisect the page with the pen).
Err…
You can sign it with an X. Now, let’s fix those papers of yours…

>I bet it'll feel good to eat a nice hot meal and sleep in a real bed after what you've been through.
Bah, I can’t remember the last time I had a good meal or a good night sleep. Everything taste like ash these days and the nights are filled terrors from beyond the veil.
>Might as well see how the gang is doing.
Barkeep, another glass of your finest wine, please.
Coming right up, Scholar. That will be 4 Swallows.
Do you have change for a Magpie? Oh, Greetings Bradford. I have to say, you took a long time to get your papers done. Did they think you’ve hidden an army of the dead in your beard?
Hah! The only thing that beard is hiding is another fist!
Greetings Jal… where are the others?
Well… The kid… Vladimir, was it? He needed some time alone, he said. Alex went with him… something about training to mend a broken heart just like mending a broken bone and his reward for carrying his stuff.
Heh, He got some fun just by carrying her stuff? Remind me to give her a few ales on the house.
Alex, putting out? Hah, the poor kid would have come running by now if that was true. No, she’s probably just talking with him about what happened.
Oh, and if you see Vladimir, can you tell him his father’s tap is paid off. He was a good man, a bit happy with a glass but still a good man. Shame what happened to him. Now, what can I do you for!?

Insert Ale and wenches, please_

>>559830
Ale and wenches, please.

Strongest thing in the house.

...wow, someone using a euphemism and actually meaning what it literally describes. And choosing to try and be responsible and sane instead of jumping immediately into bed.

This really is a new universe!

>ale and wenches
And a hearty meal. No good getting drunk on an empty stomach. You'll just make yourself sick and miserable.

Kaktus 2014/01/28(Tue)08:11 No. 559845 ID: 549d6c
File 139092547608.png - (30.53KB , 900x450 , 26.png )

>Ale and wenches, please.
Ale I can give you, but you have to find the wenches yourself. This place is called “Hård’s Ale and bedding” not “Ale and wenches”. Of course, you’ll have trouble finding any, lad, been hard to find any nice girls for coin ever since the order made it illegal.
>Strongest thing in the house.
Sorry, lad, but it’s illegal to serve the stronger stuff before nightfall. I can serve you some really strong human ale if you wish, though.
>And a hearty meal.
We got some nice newly caught hare with bread, potatoes and carrots as today special. Only a Magpie with your ale included.
Here’s a crow… and bedding? How much for a nice private room?
-and nine Magpies as change. A bed? Why, it’s onl-
Actually, I’ve spoken with the caravan master. He was rather grateful that you and Vladimir escorted us here with the spider (Of course, he was mostly happy that the spider was safe.) so he’s willing to let you have the rooms meant for those that didn’t make it.
He giving me a room for just walking with you guys for an hour and a half?
Well, he’s already paid for them and… well… I might have spun the tale a bit when we met those undead. But you should accept. It’s never wise to look a gift spider in the mouth, you know.

So… what now?
What do you mean, what now? Weren’t you here to find an albino troll to grapple with? To stab it from the heart of Hel’s domain itself? To spit your last hateful breath at it?
…Are you talking gibberish or…?
*Sigh* Just make sure your spear doesn’t drag you over the cliff in the end, Bradford. But if you want some advice I would say to seek out the Order, they probably know the most of about these lonely mountains. Hmm… if you’re quick, maybe you can catch up with that human girl… Sofia?
Ann-Sofie.
Yes, Anna… She ran off to sign up with them as soon as we entered the city. Or maybe you can go talk to one of their higher ups.
I know that both captain Andrzej and ranger lord Mikhail is willing to talk with mercenaries about the dangers of the mountains. Oh, and if you’re looking for some extra cash, there’s always the Wanted posters just outside the inn, lad.
(Hmm… they also did say I should seek out a doctor Vadoma about my… condition.)
But first, enjoy your damn meal already!

Insert New quest received: Find some fine wenches to frolic with_

He is right, let yourself eat and be thankful for another day of life and good food, and new friends.

Though finding a physician afterwords could be a good idea.

>It’s never wise to look a gift spider in the mouth, you know.
Of course not. You're liable to get bitten that way, a stranger getting all up in a spider's face!

>what do
Let's go talk to the order, see if we bump into Anna. She was fun.

We'll check out the doctor and the dire prognosis on your soul later.

well we kinda joined the order already so we do probably need to talk to someone there at some point so lets go do that after we finish our meal. Then the doctor

Kaktus 2014/01/28(Tue)12:53 No. 559880 ID: 549d6c
File 139094243116.png - (27.30KB , 900x450 , 27.png )

>He is right, let yourself eat and be thankful for another day of life and good food, and new friends.
The food tastes like ash and the ale like piss… of course, everything thing taste like ash and piss so I shouldn’t really complain…
>Let's go talk to the order, see if we bump into Anna. She was fun.
To the cathedral then, I’m guessing that’s the huge stone building in the middle of the city.

-any last words before you meet the light?
P-please! I’m i-innocent! I haven’t done a-anything wrong!
Face your destruction with dignity, feeble minded fool! What is the point of fearing death? We will all be consumed by the coming shadow in the end!
May the light have mercy on your stained souls. Begin the execution.
N-no wait! Y-you can’t d-do this!
You have been on trial and found guilty. Your sentence is death.
I d-didn’t know about it! It most h-have been planted! Please! I’ll d-do anything! Don’t kill me!
…start the execution.

Insert Off with his head!_

>>559880
Interesting how the mantis knows about the Coming Darkness. I say stop him from being killed, because I want to interrogate him. The other one may actually be innocent, to boot, but... they did get put on trial. Was it a legitimate trial?

At the very least can you try to have the execution delayed until we check things out?

Actually, we should check that a wizard or someone has examined 'Coming Darkness' guy before he is killed. The last guy we saw who ranted like that had a city-eating demon explode out of his corpse after we killed him.

Uh, so what were they charged with? And can we hop over to their heads to listen in to their thoughts and see if he's really innocent?

hope this guy isn't a deamon worshiper, last time we saw one of those guys get offed a deamon came out and erased every living thing in a nearby city. No signs of a struggle, no property damage, just every living thing from a person to a bug simply vanished in a instant.

Let's ask Anne-Sophie about this-what were they convicted of, and why?
I can understand why some of us wanna just swoop in and be a hero, but remember -we're on parole here, and frankly, these guys getting executed probably are getting killed for a reason.

I doubt this mantis dying is going to summon a daemon, but there's other things his death could trigger. A stealth enchant on him that consumes his soul on-death to fuel a nasty destructive spell sounds like the kind of shit the cultists would get up to.

Unfortunately you don't have any clout to stop the execution long enough to check; You don't even have ID that you're an Order initiate. But maybe Anna could help here.

Step up and ask Anna what the prisoners are being executed for. Then you can ask if they've been screened for on-death activated magic type things and suggest the undead cultists might pull that kind of shit to take out paladins. She's such a go-getter she'll bring that up to the paladin in charge right away.

Alternatively, you could delay this a bit by asking if they'd like to see a demonstration of what a Windwalker can do, using the condemned prisoners as targets.

And that human prisoner will do anything to avoid execution? Would Doctor Vadoma's studies benefit from a human test subject to experiment on?

>"Everything tastes like ash and piss"
Better mention that to Doctor Vadoma when you meet him (or her.) It's likely from your soul condition, but making sure it's from that and not something else would be prudent.

On the (slightly) bright side; You can save you money on food and drink since everything tastes the same. Just buy whatever is the cheapest that won't make you sick. In fact, you might be able to make money with it by taking bar wagers to eat or drink something really vile.

Kaktus 2014/01/29(Wed)06:30 No. 559982 ID: 549d6c
File 139100584671.png - (26.68KB , 900x450 , 28.png )

>On the (slightly) bright side; You can save you money on food and drink since everything tastes the same. Just buy whatever is the cheapest that won't make you sick.
I’ve never really cared for coin… and I still need to eat a filling meal to get by.

>Let's ask Anne-Sophie about this-what were they convicted of, and why?
I dunno… I think she said it was something about weapon smuggling or something.
>Was it a legitimate trial?
Of course, they are the law here after all.
>Ask if they've been screened for on-death activated magic type things.
Um… probably? I mean, they are professional cultist killers so… besides, they just cut off the mantis head and nothing happened.
…oh.
Next.
P-please…

>At the very least can you try to have the execution delayed until we check things out?
Excuse me, what are they being executed for?
*Sigh* The convict was cough red handed selling armaments to the cultist and have been put on trial in front of a jury. His punishment is death.
>And that human prisoner will do anything to avoid execution?
-wouldn’t it be better to have him work it off instead? As a human test subject to be experiment on, perhaps?
Y-yes! Please! Anything but death!
The only thing we need for our experiments is corpses and we have enough of those already.
Don’t you have some kind of Penal force? Let him fight the dead?
…Who are you eve- never mind. If you interrupt us one more time I will have you arrested for obstructing the law. Now, cut off his hea-
Sir! New orders, sir!
What now!? Hmm… *Sigh* Cancel the execution on the human… they got other plans for him.
YES!! I’ll live!
Bah! I came ‘ere to see some blood, dammit!
Well, that’s that then.
(Hmm… I should have sworn that I saw the guy coming with the new orders hiding behind the corner just waiting for something...)
Nice to see you again, Mr. beard man, but I got to go and sign up with the Order now, so bye!

Insert Beard man, with the power of beard!_

>Of course, they are the law here after all.
Ah, naive trust in governing authorities. Just because the law is the law doesn't mean it's just.

>gottagobye!
Goodbye.

>what do
Alright, who were we supposed to talk to at the order? We already annoyed the executioners, but I doubt they're the managers as well.

Anna's probably heading in the same direction as you, so may as well walk with her. Mention that you signed up with the Order just a short while ago and you're going in to get your seal and first mission.

Compliment the guy who brought the new orders on his impeccable timing, waiting until just after the unrepentant cultist was whacked. Don't want those types around for any reason, right?

Hey, did the Order already apply the tracking magic to you? If not then they probably will when you report in.

Kaktus 2014/01/29(Wed)11:16 No. 559998 ID: 549d6c
File 139102300471.png - (20.30KB , 900x450 , 29.png )

>Ah, naive trust in governing authorities. Just because the law is the law doesn't mean it's just.
Just because the law is hard doesn’t mean it’s unjust either.
>Hey, did the Order already apply the tracking magic to you?
One of their men in a dress waved around a stick and chanted something before I left the toll house. I’m guessing that was the tracking magic.

>Alright, who were we supposed to talk to at the order? Anna's probably heading in the same direction as you, so may as well walk with her.
Actually, we’re probably heading in the same direction.
Oh, you’re going to sign up too? Well, I hope you’re ready to crack some undead skulls then.
The orders isn’t just about cracking skulls. You forgot the ripping out of hearts.
And cutting off heads.
Dismembering limbs.
Crushing ribs.
Breaking sp-
>Mention that you signed up with the Order just a short while ago and you're going in to get your seal and first mission.
Calculating spleens.
Creating La- hey, we’re here!
Welcome to the order of light. If you wish to sign up please follow me.
Actually, I’ve already signed. We’re do I get my seal and first mission.
Down the corridor and to your right. Talk to captain Andrzej, the mantis, about your new tasks.

…

-Ten of them… one of them a Vildman… and he took them all on. He even ripped out the heart on the big one with his bare hands! BARE HANDS!
That… that doesn’t really sound plausible. And you say that he’s going to sign up with us?
Of course he is! What else is there to do in this god forsaken town? I’m telling you; keep on the lookout for a man twice the size of any normal man… and a beard so big even the rangers would be lost in it!
… …right.

Insert Next time it’s going to be twenty of them… and a dog_

>Just because the law is hard doesn’t mean it’s unjust either.
True. But this is why we ask questions. You don't know, otherwise. We still don't, in this case.

>keep on the lookout for a man twice the size of any normal man… and a beard so big even the rangers would be lost in it!
I think you've exaggerated my height, but you're probably right about the beard.

>>559998
Tell them that he's exaggerating. Or is that a she? I have trouble telling what gender a mantis is when there's nobody of the opposite sex to compare them to.

Damn straight he's right about the beard. Or she, Mantis person.

Regardless, go up to that desk, get your seal, and proceed to become a new initiate.

Kaktus 2014/01/29(Wed)12:43 No. 560007 ID: 549d6c
File 139102823193.png - (20.05KB , 900x450 , 30.png )

>I have trouble telling what gender a mantis is when there's nobody of the opposite sex to compare them to.
Well, he is rather short… and I’m pretty sure Andrzej is a male name… probably.
>Damn straight he's right about the beard.
-but he’s exaggerating my height a bit.
And the part about you ripping undead Vildmän hearts out?
Well… he wasn’t a Vildman… but I did rip it out with my bare hands.
I have to admit you have a nice beard but…
>Regardless, go up to that desk beer keg, get your seal, and proceed to become a new initiate.
I’m here to pick up my seal?
Privates, leave us.
At once, captain.
So… you’re the special case? The Mr. “Von Beard”? …was that really the best fake name you should come up with?
I thought it would be fitting.
I’m going to call you initiate Bradford from now on. First, let’s try out your combat expertise. See those manikins at the e-
*Crash*
…well then, that story about you wasn’t completely bullshit, was it? Congratulations, welcome to the order of light and blah blah blah, here’s your seal. Now… we usually send out rookies on some deadbeat job for the first few days but you… let’s just say I have a special task for you. It just happens to be on one of those rookie missions I need something done… something I need to be done with great force. I want you to report to me here at three over midday, punctual. I’ll fill you in on the mission then… so unless there was something else; you’re dismissed, initiate!

(It’s just about midday now… three hours of doing nothing, then?)

Insert Quick, watch the grass grow! …Yes, I know there’s snow out, but still!_

Well, you still need to see Doctor Vadoma about your soul "condition." There's also Ranger Lord Mikhail, which I think might be the one to talk to about a job for Vlad. He'd also be the one to ask about current intel on the undead in the mountains. We also didn't get to talk to Vlad about this, so swinging by the inn before talking to Mikhail would make sense.

I say go to Doctor Vadoma first, then then Vlad at the inn, then Mikhail, if you have time.

>>560007
Visit ZE DOKTOR. Three hours is enough for a thorough examination.

Yeah, time to confront the medical man about this whole lack of a soul nonsense.

Kaktus 2014/01/30(Thu)07:52 No. 560102 ID: 549d6c
File 139109716398.png - (23.50KB , 900x450 , 31.png )

>We didn't get to talk to Vlad.
I should probably take some time to talk to the kid later. Siegfried himself knows that he’ll need it.
>There's also Ranger Lord Mikhail, which I think might be the one to talk to about a job for Vlad. He'd also be the one to ask about current intel on the undead in the mountains.
Of course, I have no idea if the kid actually wants to work with the order or not.

>Visit ZE DOKTOR.
Doctor Vadoma, we got another test subject for you.
Good, this one is about to expire and I need a replacement fo- How many times do I have to tell you! They don’t walk around anymore!
But the tests-
You probably did them wrong again. Drag that hairy thing back to wherever you found it and bring me some real subjects next time! I’m starting to run dry here!
…Can’t you just make su-
Leave me before I start dissecting you alive too. Bah, no respect for the scientific method. Now… where was I…
…sorry, sir, but it seems to have been some mistake somewhere. I have to ask you to leave.
Just leave already! You’re disturbing my scientific genius! Perkele, where did I put his left lung!?
Um… yes… like the good doctor said… she doesn’t want to be disturbed…

Insert This one too fat… this one too tall… this one too symmetrical!_

Ignore the guard.

You can rip helpless corpses (or near corpses) apart anyday, quack. What I need from you now is to tell me about your tests and the supposed damage to my soul.

And the lung is behind you, stuck to the wall.

Right, We where told to come her about something involving us having a shattered soul or something, know anything about that or you just going to play doctor a bit more?

...I think the "good doctor" will have a hard time not being disturbed since she appears to be plenty disturbed all on her own.

Ask the assistant what is she even looking for rummaging around inside the undead? ...At least, I hope that's an undead. 'Cause if she's brutally dissecting still-living people we may have issues with that.

Point out that she doesn't know her assistant did the test wrong. What if he did it right? What if the test is generating false negatives and positives when done wrong? There could be test subjects slipping through 'cause of that.

How about after she scrapes that lung off the wall and finished up here she supervises her assistant as he does the test again? Make sure he did it right, and correct him if he did it wrong.

Kaktus 2014/01/30(Thu)10:43 No. 560129 ID: 549d6c
File 139110743285.png - (24.11KB , 900x450 , 32.png )

>the lung is behind you, stuck to the wall.
That’s just a bloodstain.
>I hope that's an undead.
Well… um… no…
You’re dissecting living people!?
I wouldn’t call them living… err… they are afflicted, as we call them. The lights are on but there’s no one home, if you get my meaning.
…afflicted with the same thing I am?
If the test are right… yes…
>Ask the assistant what is she even looking for rummaging around inside the afflicted?
She’s collecting what we call essence. Well, corrupted essence to be precise.
What I really need is some pure essence, but nooo… it’s wrong to dissect living people, bluh bluh! It’s alright to dissect these vegetables but not the criminals they are going to kill anyway? Bah, hypocrites!

>Point out that she doesn't know her assistant did the test wrong. What if he did it right?
Of course she did it wrong! You aren’t a brain dead vegetable!
But what if I’m really is afflicted with… whatever it is?
They you would be one in a million. Face it, hairball, you aren’t afflicted.
Can you really take the chance that I aren’t?
…fine, I’ll do I quick test. Stand still a be quiet.
Err… shouldn’t you watch away the blood first?
*Scratch*
Shh… I’m trying to focus… and it’s just some blood. Just don’t lick it off you’ll be fine…
*Scratch*Scratch*
Unless you really get off on that kind of stuff… then lick away.
*Scratch*
…Do you hear scratching?
Interesting… hmm… tell me... how long have you…
About a month ago… I can’t really remember anything before that. Just bit and pieces.
Where were you a month ago?
I woke up in a village that was burned down by the undead… I was the only survivor. I don’t know the name… but it was to the south…
Hmmm… well?
According to the records, there was an attack a month ago… before we managed to trap it up in the mountains. It was the odd one, the one with the traces of a battle.
…Well, congratulations, you’re probably afflicted! How interesting!
>Tell me about the supposed damage to my soul.
Soul? Bah! It’s not some kind of religious mumbo jumbo. It’s called essence. Life essence! You need the stuff to live because without it… well… vegetable. And it isn’t damage, more… corrupted. By a daemon…
…so I was attack by a daemon?
Attacked!? HA! You were merely nearby when its true form came into our world for a split second. It barely needs to think about you to turn you into dust. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time… somewhere it didn’t spot you when it came.
I did wake up in an old dried out well…
Ah… there you go… now, the interesting thing is, why aren’t you like the others who’s been close to one of those things? Why can you still think? Hmmm… if only I should cut you open and find out… bah, ethic laws…

Insert No Brad, you are the daemons! Then Brad was a zombie_

It's not the ethics laws stopping you, it's the fact that if you tried to cut me open I'd break your claws.

...I don't suppose you have any less invasive ways or examining essence? Sensors, spells, medical equipment, resonances with other essence? There's more to medicine and science than the knife, after all.

uh, I think I see something right above the light on the right

But yeah whenever we have heard scratching that usually means a deamon or a wrath is nearby. Other then being corrupted does this mean anything or can I just ignore it?

>>560129
Maybe it's because you're a windwalker. Also did part of the test subject's face just float off towards the ceiling or was that an art error?

Ask how she made you hear those scratching noises. We've heard those before, in the presence of Wraiths.

Kaktus 2014/01/30(Thu)11:39 No. 560139 ID: 549d6c
File 139111079534.png - (23.43KB , 900x450 , 33.png )

>Did part of the test subject's face just float off towards the ceiling or was that an art error?
Art error
>It's not the ethics laws stopping you, it's the fact that if you tried to cut me open I'd break your claws.
Why, aren’t you a feisty one.
-and then I’ll rip of your arms and force feed them to you!
You’ll have to buy me dinner first, hairball.
-and I’ll finish with tearing off your head and shove it so far up your abdomen that your ribcage will protect it.
Why, I never! Those things are supposed to stay in the bedroom, good sir!
…is she being sarcastic or…
Don’t ask, trust me…
>...I don't suppose you have any less invasive ways or examining essence?
Well, if you want to be boring about it, sure. I can always take a blood sample but… it won’t give as good results as tearing open your beautiful insides but it will have to do for now.
>Ask how she made you hear those scratching noises.
You heard it too? Are you hearing it now?
I only heard it when you tested me.
Hmm… intriguing… tell me… any other weird effects?
Everything taste like ash and nothing smells good anymore.
Really? Hmm… have you enjoyed some good music lately? Maybe some theater? A good book?
…no?
Sex?
No.
Hmm… they did forbid me from artificially impregnate someone so… maybe… hmm… maybe we should find you a nice girl and… dammit, why shouldn’t you have been a mantis? It would have been so much easier… but of course… I wonder what would happen if you and me-
Finish that thought and I’ll break your spine, witch.
No time for foreplay, hairball, I got more important things to consider. Hmm… what if… yes, that might work… it would be interesting to try… heh… hehe…
…I have to tell you, this is the first time I’m actually scared since I can remember.
Really? So you can feel fear? What else can you feel?
The lust for battle! It’s the only time I feel alive!
Typical male, can’t see the true beauty of death and blood. Whatever, smite him.
Err… what? I can’t just-
Smite him for science, you fool! It probably won’t hurt him… maybe… if he’s lucky… now smite him while I go and get some things.
But…
Oh, and hit him. Real hard! Right across the face! Make him bleed a bit!
Err…

Insert A special kind of crazy_

look at the guard and say "I don't envy your job" and walk out. Think we learned all we can from here. Might as well go see how Vlad is doing to kill the rest of our free time before we have to report in.

A little smiting won't even curl a hair on your mighty beard, I'd almost like to see him try.

>>560139
Try to take out the guard nonlethally if he actually tries to kill you.

Kaktus 2014/01/30(Thu)14:04 No. 560162 ID: 549d6c
File 139111946382.png - (30.33KB , 900x450 , 34.png )

>Try to take out the guard nonlethally if he actually tries to kill you.
I’m pretty sure he won’t try to kill me… hurt me, yes, but not kill. I’m probably going to be content breaking one of his thumbs if he does anything stupid.
>I don't envy your job.
It beats latrine duty… most of the time…
>A little smiting won't even curl a hair on your mighty beard, I'd almost like to see him try.
…please don’t kill me if it does…
No promises. How does smiting even work?
Well… it hurts if you’re a bad person, I guess?
…how in hel’s name does a magic spell know who’s evil? And evil in what sense?
Err… you’ll ask someone higher up about that… but… um… ready?
Hit me, you wuss.
Alright, here it co-

…

So, how’s the boy?
Well, he cried a bit and seem rather depressed. He seemed a lot better from talking things trough, though. Currently his taking a little nap... he had a rather hectic morning after all.
Ah, maybe he’ll feel better after I buy him a drink? A few glasses solves everything, after all.
Please tell me you haven’t been drinking since we came here?
A few glass won’t hurt... it’s not like it will make me see double… speaking of double, do you see those two barbarian beauties over there? Maybe I should go and ask them for a little dance?
I’m pretty sure they don’t dance here… and you’re drunk. Sober Jal would never have the courage to do something like that.
I’m not drunk, just a bit tipsy! …now, whish me luck!
Might Siegfried himself guide your “steel”, friend *snicker*
Whoa… who moved the floor!? It’s all… wobbly… heh…
*Sigh* Do I really have to keep an eye on you all the time?

[You now have control over “The Priest”!]

Insert The floor is always in the last place you look_

hello Priestess Alexandra! And how are you faring today?

keep him from doing something stupid, we might need him somewhere down the road

WE ARE THE VOICES OF YOUR INNER BEARD

Not really, we're a bunch of traveling voices of indeterminate origin who like to provide insight and advice blah blah blah you're kinda stuck with us.

Something tells be that hitting on two barbarian ladies is the textbook definition of 'biting off more than one can chew'. This is gonna be HILARIOUS. And it'll fix his attitude problems damn quick.

Maybe you can introduce him to them when he's sober. Or if you want to do it now without him falling all over himself you could call them over.

So hello, we are some helpful guiding voice things. We've been assisting Bradford and Vale. I think we just got Smited out of Bradford though so we'll be with you for a bit. I hope he doesn't kill the poor sap that tried it.

>>560175
...

I vote we call ourselves the voices of your inner beard for the rest of the quest

Hello, Alexandra. We're ancient spirits, come to the world in times of great strife and change to advise those who will play a part in it. So, congrats! We were with Bradford, up until he took a doctor's recommended smite to the face. I think he'll be up and about soon, but until then you've got us.

...We're also habitual matchmakers, so don't be surprised if some of us try to get you together with any combination of, but not limited to: Vlad, Jal, Bradford, the barkeep, those two female mantis, or any number of males, females, hermaphrodites or others with, or possibly without, pulses.

Now, what to do with Jal? I say prop him up so he can get over to those two gals and watch the fun. Just step in if it looks like they're gonna make him metaphorically sticking his foot in his mouth literal.

When you're done here could you head 'round to the cathedral and check that Doctor Vadoma isn't dissecting Bradford alive while he's incapacitated.

>>560193
Can we lay off the beard running gag for this? It worked for Bradford, but for Alexandra, who's both female and a lizard, it doesn't.

Kaktus 2014/01/31(Fri)05:56 No. 560251 ID: 549d6c
File 139117656111.png - (29.84KB , 900x450 , 35.png )

>Hello Priestess Alexandra! And how are you faring today?
Wha- THE LIGHT!? I- I’m not worthy of your presence, oh great… err… unspecified concept.
>WE ARE THE VOICES OF YOUR INNER BEARD.
I… I… what… but I don’t… I’m a lizard? You’re not the light, are you!?
>We're ancient spirits, come to the world in times of great strife and change to advise those who will play a part in it. So, congrats!
…right, I think you got the wrong guy. Go to that big bearded guy instead; he was a textbook example of one of those heroes that usually show up in stories.
>We were with Bradford, up until he took a doctor's recommended smite to the face.
Ah… right… I still think you’re in the wrong head, mister.

>...We're also habitual matchmakers, so don't be surprised if some of us try to get you together with any combination of, but not limited to: Vlad, Jal, Bradford, the barkeep, those two female mantis, or any number of males, females, hermaphrodites or others with, or possibly without, pulses.
Let’s see… a kid who’s depressed and a loner… yeah, real attractive. My best friend from childhood that I know would never work… A thing that was more hair then man… a human that got like twenty years on me that I met five seconds ago (and I’m pretty sure it was his wife who was handling the rooms) and two mantises that are the wrong gender. Seems you really have your work cut out for you, huh?

>Something tells be that hitting on two barbarian ladies is the textbook definition of 'biting off more than one can chew'. This is gonna be HILARIOUS.
It would be… if it didn’t end with him getting his head smashed in because he covered them with his lunch.
Ungg… I… I don’t feel so good… can’t everything stop moving?
Why didn’t you stop him from drinking this much?
He only had a few glasses, I thought he should handle a bit more than that.
>When you're done here could you head 'round to the cathedral and check that Doctor Vadoma isn't dissecting Bradford alive while he's incapacitated.
I… what… I’m pretty sure they don’t do that kind of stuff. Anyway, I’m supposed to head there anyway and report that I’m here… with Jal… who’s drunk of his abdomen…
…Do you have anything sobering?
Well… water and coffee… that kind of stuff… I have some Serathian coffee if you are feeling brave, real strong stuff, but I usually just smack them over the head to get people sober enough to be thrown out.
None of those alternatives sound really great…
Barkeep, give me some strong stuff and keep it flowing. I’m here to forget.
*Sigh* …why do I always have to babysit everyone?

Insert Because you’re cheap… tehe…_

Well aside from your flirtations, you seem like the most reliable of the group. As it is, can you try and keep the lad from drinking himself from his misery? That never helps and usually desponds into a tale of drunken despair.

>Go to that big bearded guy instead; he was a textbook example of one of those heroes that usually show up in stories.
We've already met, thanks. Unfortunately, the thing about heros is that stories are never just about one person. Important events always have more people than you'd think involved, and they can influence things in surprising ways.

Sorry, but you've kind of found yourself in a time and place where your actions will mater. The old "May you live in interesting times" blessing / curse.

>why do I always have to babysit everyone?
It's the curse of the responsible ones. Starting to look like your thankless role may be keeping everyone else from self destructing.

...uh, worst idea ever. If Jal loses his lunch at this point, you think piles of freaky mantis vomit will put the kid off drinking himself into a stupor?

well just keep an eye on your mantis buddy and might as well start ordering him water and coffee as we got nothing else going for us in that department.

As for Vlad, ask him about us because we're pretty sure he can hear us as well, maybe bring up how Brad got a smite to the face in the name of SCIENCE. Might hold him off drink a bit longer.

Oh and about Doctor Vadoma, if you head down there's two things you should watch for, one is be on the lookout for Brad, and the other is watch out for the good doctor as she was playing with the Idea of having Brad sleep with someone to see who it would affect his condition, He basically told her to go to hell but be careful still. The doc doesn't seem like someone who cares about anyone thoughts but hers.

Kaktus 2014/01/31(Fri)10:47 No. 560280 ID: 549d6c
File 139119406219.png - (28.98KB , 900x450 , 36.png )

>...uh, worst idea ever. If Jal loses his lunch at this point, you think piles of freaky mantis vomit will put the kid off drinking himself into a stupor?
Let’s keep Jal lunch where it belongs, thank you very much.
You know… you’re my very best bro, man… do you know that? I love you, Alexan-
Get a grip on yourself, Jal.
>Might as well start ordering him water and coffee.
Coming right up.
Just make sure he sober up a bit.
I’m a bartender, not a freaking wizard, lass. Do you see me wearing a dress?
…no?
See, not a wizard, thus I can’t perform magic.

>As for Vlad, ask him about us because we're pretty sure he can hear us as well.
Those things? Who cares about those things? Pointless, that’s what they are.
Aren’t you a bit pessimistic?
Hey, “small gods”, I know what I want now… I want my family back, and not even you can do that! See, pointless.
>Maybe bring up how Brad got a smite to the face in the name of SCIENCE.
Who cares… I don’t even know him…
>Can you try and keep the lad from drinking himself from his misery?
You know… Vlad… a big muscular guy like you shouldn’t really drink like that… You’re more sexy sober~
…Alexandra, please stop it. I know you’re just doing that to manipulate me… you’re way out of my league, a real beauty. I’m, on the other hand, is just so pathetic slob with only a few coins to my name.
Alright, you really need to cheer up.
…What’s the point? There’s nothing left for me out there anyway… no, I’m just going to use the last few coins to forget about it and then lay down in a ditch somewhere… where I belong…
By the lights crap, you’re worse than I thought!

Insert Does the light crap shadows?_

>I want my family back, and not even you can do that!
Probably not, no. People coming back from the dead is well beyond our usual scope of things.

What you need now is the chance to recover and cope. You're better off keeping busy and losing yourself in a task rather than drink.

...it's all right if it hurts. It's supposed to.

Pathetic slob is definitely doing him a disservice. He's a damn good archer. Not many people can make a shot without seeing what they're shooting and having only been told the general location of the target.

lesson Vlad, I know you're feeling the loss of your family right now and you're just going through the emotions because you don't know what else to do, but Before you do anything just think of this. If you're family is looking down on you from whatever afterlife they're in now (I don't know where you people believe you go after you die) Do you really think they'd be happy to see they're son, they're big brother throwing away his life to the deamon know as drink for something that wasn't even your fault in the first place? And before you say anything NO, it was NOT your fault. You said it yourself, your family was just a bunch of hunters in the middle of nowhere, what attacked your family was an organized and powerful group of undead that even the group of knights in this town (who are trained solders) are having a hard time fighting. You did what you could, we did what we could, and no matter how much you blame yourself it's not your fault.

>>560280
Hey, what is the Light, anyway? We read some sort of present-prophecy about the bringer of light making a journey to the north. I wonder if that was us? We certainly skip around in time enough for that to have been the case.

Jal, you're one of our pawns. You will have better things to do than lie in a ditch. You WILL help us defeat the Coming Darkness. Even if you die in the process.

Kaktus 2014/01/31(Fri)12:44 No. 560293 ID: 549d6c
File 139120104519.png - (30.19KB , 900x450 , 37.png )

>Hey, what is the Light, anyway?
It’s like… a holy presence that guide us to do right? I don’t know exacly, but the Arch Bishop of the order came to the northlands about nine months ago and started spreading it’s teaching, thus creating the order of light. It’s really grown since then… mostly thanks to the undead threat.
>Even if you die in the process.
Well, that’s encouraging.

>Pathetic slob is definitely doing him a disservice. He's a damn good archer. Not many people can make a shot without seeing what they're shooting and having only been told the general location of the target.
That was pure luck and you know it.
Well, maybe you are luck- …sorry, I didn’t mean it like that…
>If your family is looking down on you from whatever afterlife they're in now, do you really think they'd be happy to see their son, their big brother throwing away his life to the demon know as drink for something that wasn't even your fault in the first place?
Not my fault? I should have been there! I should have saved them!
>NO, it was NOT your fault.
Do you really believe you’re such a good fighter that you would have won?
I… I… m-maybe? Maybe I should have given them time… maybe… I… shut up! You don’t know how it feels to lose everything.
…yes. Yes I do…
>What you need now is the chance to recover and cope. You're better off keeping busy and losing yourself in a task rather than drink.
…like what?
How about joining the order? Get some vengeance?
Revenge is pointless. It won’t make anything better.
How about making sure no one else loses their family to the undead horde?
…that… that actually sound… worthwhile…
We are in dire need of recruits right now. If you want to make a difference, if you want to help people, please, sign up.
Wait… haven’t we already signed that thingy back before we even came here? That’s why we came here in the first place right? *Hic*
Ah, you must be the alchemist and the battle priest we requested… err… battle priestess? You came just in time, in just an hour we’re going to send out a group of novices that I wish you’ll accompany.
Wait, battle priestess!? That wasn’t what I signed up for!
We are in dire need of field medics… and your offensive light magic is the reason why you caught our eyes in the first place. Please, the people in the fields needs your aid!

Insert Uncle bishop wants you!_

>>560293
What's the problem, Alex?

You DID fry that one undead that nearly got Jai... But I also hear there was some bragging go around. Are you a battle Preistess Alex? Or more of an initiate that survived a trail by fire?

Wait a minute the bringer of light arrived nine months ago!? Oh god please tell us the calendar date.

wait is Jai coming on this trip as well, god damn it now we really need to sober him up... would also be nice if we could check on Brad since we really don't know what happened to him after he got smited.

Kaktus 2014/01/31(Fri)15:20 No. 560305 ID: 549d6c
File 139121040030.png - (30.16KB , 900x450 , 38.png )

>Wait a minute the bringer of light arrived nine months ago!? Oh god please tell us the calendar date.
Um… 23 of the 3rd month of Thane’s season, 3996?

>What's the problem, Alex?
I signed up to become a healer, not some warrior!
But you’re going to be a healer.
I just wanted a non-dangerous job far away from home, not actually fight the undead.
But we need someone who can save lives outside the city. Not only can you heal with your holy magic’s, but you can also harm the dead.
>You DID fry that one undead that nearly got Jai...
I can shoot one bolt. One! Then I’m completely spent! What am I supposed to do if there is more than one, huh?
One bolt that actually kills them, instead of one that merely hurt them. You only need some training… and you won’t be alone.
No. I’m not risking my life and that’s finale.
Not even to prevent someone else from losing everything?
How can she prevent anything if he loses herself?
I’m sorry, but where already fully staffed when it comes to non-combatants.
But… I came all this way… and… I don’t want to go back…

Insert Running away right into a brick wall_

>>560305
Alex, I hate to say this, but what I said about Vlad applies to you too. You are one of our pawns. You must fight. For the sake of the world.

Then don't run away, just think of it like this, while yes you'll be going into dangerous places you main job will be to make sure no one dies, people that wouldn't be able to survive a trip back to base once they're wounded on the field. I know this isn't what you wanted but you wanted to help people right? This way you can help people who otherwise wouldn't get any help until it's to late. and I don't mean just the solders who will be acting as your meatshield, people Like Vlad who can't afford the protection of living in a city, If we come across another case like that and someone gets hurt who'd we turn to so they don't perish before we can get them to another healer?

Also on the plus side you'll have some crazy stories to tell you kids if you ever decide to settle down.

Alexandra, did you not become a priestess to help and heal those in dire need? Because I cannot think of ones who are in more dire need than those injured on the battlefield. The ones who's lives would pass before they could be brought anywhere near the walls you want to stay behind. Right here and now to go out there is the most good you can do in this world.

And if appealing to your sense of good doesn't work, then think of Jal. If you leave him behind then who'll be around to stop him from making drunken passes at barbarian gals and eventually getting his mandibles punched in? You're not going to leave your best friend behind, are you?

Also, this is probably about the safest situation you could be in to get experience as a battle priest. If one hour from now is three in the afternoon, then I'm certain Bradford will be in the ranks of the group of novices that's heading out. Having him around is like having a mobile fifty meter wide aura of undead dismemberment. The only way undead would get near you is if you ask him to hold one up for target practice.

...Dammit, we never did get the date when we were with Jericho so we can't tell anything from the current date. Okay, different tack: What big news has come out of the Serath Kingdom and Keer Republic in the time after the archbishop left to come to the Northlands? Oh, and could you also tell us where the archbishop came from?

I WAS JOKING ABOUT THE WHOLE 'INNER BEARD' THING, BUT SERIOUSLY, YOU ALL NEED TO MAN UP. Vlad, if you're plan is to lie down and die, you have no right to call anything pointless. I don't even know your father and I know he would not have wanted you to get drunk in the face of adversary. You have a bow, the best hunting skills your father could have taught you, a head full of mad, and a near endless supply of undead. There is only one thing you can do that this point, and IT ISN'T SELLING FAMILY HEIRLOOMS FOR BEER MONEY.

ALEX, request to go with Bradford. We can help with coordination, you'll be in a decent- sized group and OH YEAH BRADFORD IS A ZOMBIE-CRUSHING MEAT GRINDER WHO CARRIES MORE WEAPONS THAN HE HAS HANDS. There's no way out of this that I can see, so you'd better be as ready as you can for what's ahead.

And lastly, we know both of you have seen some messed-up shit, but that will pale in comparison to dozens of voices inside your head trying to sing.

Harsh truth time. You're in a city surrounded by hostile undead. There is no safe job. You don't have a safe way to get out of here. If you're not out there helping with the problem, all you're doing is delaying your inevitable run in with hostiles. Because they will come.

At least this way you can be proactive about the problem. And you're better of trained than not when you inevitably run into one of these things.

Sorry, like I said before. You're stuck in a time and place where your choices matter. You don't have the luxury of overmuch safety.

Kaktus 2014/02/01(Sat)06:40 No. 560386 ID: 549d6c
File 139126560833.png - (24.80KB , 900x450 , 39.png )

>What big news has come out of the Serath Kingdom and Keer Republic in the time after the archbishop left to come to the Northlands? Oh, and could you also tell us where the archbishop came from?
Err… I don’t know… you have to ask someone else about that.
>Harsh truth time. You're in a city surrounded by hostile undead. There is no safe job.
Some are safer than others! There’s a difference between fighting them directly and sitting in a castle.
>Alexandra, did you not become a priestess to help and heal those in dire need?
No, I became a priest to escape my past.
>if appealing to your sense of good doesn't work, then think of Jal.
Of course I’m not leaving Jal… err… actually, Jal came here because of me but… I don’t really have anywhere else to run so…
>on the plus side you'll have some crazy stories to tell you kids if you ever decide to settle down.
…yea… kids… *sigh*…
>What about the people like Vlad? Those that can’t afford to live the protection of the city?
…fine, I’ll become one of the battle thingies…
Glorious! Make yourself ready, you’ll have your first mission in just an hour. Don’t worry, it won’t be anything dangerous.

…

-any minute now… I didn’t expect it to actually… hurt him.
I hope he doesn’t hurt me for this…
So… any reason why you came personally?
Hmm… Because I think I know them… we’ve met before…
…you know this hairball?
Not the human… the things that he carries.
Ungh…?

Insert At least he doesn’t have a hangover_

Wait he can see us? Greetings Archbishop! Fancy gear you got there.

well the only humans we know from around this time (I think) are a blind necromancer and a dwarf.

Anyways rise and shine Brad, we have a mission in about an hour.

>I think I know them… we’ve met before…
You mean us? Can't say if we've met before, actually. We're terrible with voices, and that mask there is blocking our view of your face.

Ask Nurse Verity Doctor Vadoma just what the fuck she was hoping to find out from you getting your face smote. That smiting knocks you out?

Then ask the archbishop what our color is, and what his is. We won't say it, just in case he can hear us. And would he be so kind as to take that mask off so we can see his face?

I have a hunch that we've met the archbishop before he became the archbishop, bolstered by the fact that he's human and, as far as I can tell, male. Once again, I won't say in case he can hear us.

>>560413
Yep, this. Ask about colors.

Kaktus 2014/02/01(Sat)10:57 No. 560422 ID: 549d6c
File 139128107909.png - (25.07KB , 900x450 , 40.png )

>Greetings Archbishop! Fancy gear you got there.
…
>Anyways rise and shine Brad, we have a mission in about an hour.
Ugh… how long was I out?
An hour and a half. Don’t worry, I took real good care of you~
Err…
Oh, and I would recommend that you don’t sit down for a while. You might still might be a bit… sore back there.
She’s joking, sir. We only took a blood sample from your finger, nothing else.
Bah, stop ruining my fun!
And please forgive me for knocking you senseless, sir, it wasn’t my intention. Um… Please don’t hurt me?
>Ask Doctor Vadoma just what the fuck she was hoping to find out from you getting your face smote. That smiting knocks you out?
Smiting only hurts the undead and “evil” people. The affect it had on you would either mean that you’re a seriously evil son of a bitch or that we can... well, “fight” the part of you that is corrupted. In fact, I asked the Arch Bishop for a blessed weapon and he personally blessed your war hammer himself. It is now a bane to the darkness… and hopefully will have a positive effect on your essence while you wield it.

>Can't say if we've met before, actually. We're terrible with voices, and that mask there is blocking our view of your face.
Stop being a coward hiding behind a mask and show me your true self, Bishop.
…I have to say, your new king is a bit… rough around the edges, aren’t he?
King? What king?
I’m guessing from your new king that you lost your last one when the daemon came before the sky fell down in the Serath nation. You weren’t the only one, just so you know.
>Ask the archbishop what our color is, and what his is.
You’re Teal, of course… and I don’t trust you to reveal who I am. Your king has been corrupted by a Daemon, what’s stopping you from being corrupted too?
I’m no servant of the darkness!
What you believe you are is irrelevant. The path to Hel’s domain is pawned with good intentions, after all. Now, I do believe you have a mission to venture on?

Insert The darkness wishes to have a nice glass of chianti, if you would be so kind_

the fuck you talking about the last thing we did back in Serath was watch the tribal army fight off undead in the pass on there way to the capital. Oh god this one of those time things where we jump back and forth isn't it? We had something like this to a lesser effect not to long ago. So what happened in good old Serath, who won the war and what happened to the royal family, seeing as we practically where part of the family at that point I'm kinda worried.

We lost our last king? Nooo! All our work, all our good friends! D:

Would knowing your color actually let us do anything to you? The only practical application I can think of is knowing whether messages refer to you or someone else pretending to be you.
And wouldn't you be able to tell if we were corrupted by us trying to take over our King and kill everyone else like the last corrupted Color we saw?

>>560422
Yeah, I don't believe this guy at all.
[check status of all pawns]

Also I bet his player is Grey. He met us before, is human, and doesn't want us to know his player's color.

He's not our king, the log clearly state's he's an angry pile of snow- wait what.

What the hell happened to the Seraths?

>you lost your last one when the daemon came before the sky fell down in the Serath nation
Actually it was when we accidentally reset the universe in a puff of logic. Plot holes are dangerous, man.

>>560433
Seconding not taking anything he's saying at face value.

[Message to player pink: hey, you around anywhere? We've been forcibly switched from the desert to snowy north, and we're hearing that something may have happened to Serath from potentially untrustworthy sources]

>how do I know you're not corrupted
Because, by our very nature, corruption is pointless. We've already a fragmented and competing collective, self-corrupted and infighting. There's no 'whole' to corrupt. Emergent systems are kind of nice that way.

Kaktus 2014/02/01(Sat)12:45 No. 560450 ID: 549d6c
File 139128752031.png - (25.70KB , 900x450 , 41.png )

>[check status of all pawns]
[“The hunter” Status: Depressed, “The priest” Status: Normal, “The Alchemist” Status: 87% claimed.]
>He's not our king, the log clearly state's he's an angry pile of snow- wait what.
[Your current king is “The Savage”.]
>[Message to player pink.]
[Player Pink is currently too busy to answer.]

>Would knowing your color actually let us do anything to you?
If you were infected, yes.
>We lost our last king? Nooo!
So, you don’t remember what happened? Hmm… I know that feeling.
>I bet his player is Grey.
…if that is what you wish to believe…
(…I think I saw him jump just when I said he was grey.)

>So what happened in good old Serath, who won the war and what happened to the royal family?
Didn’t you know? The Serath deserts are no more… a new Sultan has taken the throne. As for the war… it’s just begun. Both the skirmish in the desert sands and the one in these cold mountains are simply flanking maneuvers. The real war will be fought on the other side of the great sea… and it’s already begun. Now, please excuse me, I have some really important guests to take care of. May the light be with you always, child.
…talk about exact words.

Insert Important as in concubine, am I right?_

what the hell does he mean the deserts are no more? and I'm pretty sure they people of Serath said they were in a war. So either we're really out of it or we're playing two games at once. Ah fuck it, let's just deal with our current problems for now and we can over think this later.

>>560451

Agreed, if we cannot influence or check other locales, we will simply have to deal with the current hand.

[Leave a voicemail for player pink: Get back to us when you have the chance, okay? We either got perspective jumped or killed, and we'd like to compare notes with you. Also, we suspect grey is messing with us]

>a new Sultan has taken the throne
Who?

>>560450
SHIT. He was telling the truth. I hope our old pawns are okay. Well, we'll find out in time, I expect. If they are, we can tap them for assistance. Jericho is probably dead, for us to have lost our memory... dammit, we've never lost this many friends before. Fucking Demons.

I don't know what we can even do anymore to fight this directly. We should not have died to a goddamn flanking maneuver. Maybe we should stay out of the main fight until we find a way to approach a Demon directly. Or maybe the key is you, Bradford? Perhaps your tainted soul is inedible? We need some sort of protection from the Demon's soul-rending aura.

Go try out your blessed hammer on some training dummies.

>>560454
Hey, no! Don't tell Pink where Grey is. If Pink is infected then she could infect Grey. I'm fairly sure we can't be infected, but Pink certainly can.

>>560451
The deserts are no more because the tribals succeeded and made it rain. We probably united the land or something and helped them do what they needed to do to accomplish that.

>SHIT. He was telling the truth.
We don't know that. What we've discovered so far is consistent with his story being true, but it doesn't prove it. He could still be giving us a selection of the facts to mislead us.

>don't tell pink about grey
Fine, whatever. I'd still like to leave a message to get back to us, though.

Bradford, I don't trust what the archbishop is saying yet. We'll have to check what he said against other sources before I believe it. But if what he said is true... Well, I have my hunches, and they're all bad news.

Just head down to the meeting spot for this mission. We'll deal with what's in front of us until we learn more.

[Check status of current alliances and logs of past alliances] I doubt we're still allied with Pink, but this might tell us when the alliance was broken.

>>560454
Even if we could get in contact with Pink we couldn't trust her; At least, not right away. If we were corrupted then she could have as well. And even if she wasn't we don't know what her stance and agenda is now. Hell, she could have died and came back like Gray did... Or like how it's looking like we did.

>>560456
Well, I have a strong suspicion that we can be infected. Remember right before our memories cut off we had three incidents where there wasn't a wraith around, yet our words were twisted or there were suggestions that didn't come from us? It's quite possible we ended up like Gray and came back with only the memories up to right before the corruption took hold.

Bottom line: We need to find out more, from separate sources, before making any conclusions.

Kaktus 2014/02/01(Sat)14:31 No. 560460 ID: 549d6c
File 139129388471.png - (23.41KB , 900x450 , 42.png )

>[Check status of current alliances and logs of past alliances]
[You are currently allied with PINK in the past!]
>[Leave a voicemail for player pink: Get back to us when you have the chance, okay? We either got perspective jumped or killed, and we'd like to compare notes with you.]
[Message sent!]
>What the hell does he mean the deserts are no more?
-Hey! I’m talking to you! Stop walking away!
Ohohoh, I know! I know what he means!
…well?
The desert is gone, silly. It’s not there anymore. Every last grain of sand disappeared.
It’s… gone?
Tears fell from the sky and now there is no desert no more.
…what do you mean?
Tshh, information isn’t free, you know… if you want to know you’ll have to pay the price, hairball.
>Who is this Sultan?
Hmm… I can’t remember her name… young girl… If I remember correctly she should be on her way here in a ship sailing through the sky right now… in fact, she’s probably the important guest the Arch Bishop was talking about.
…a ship sailing through the sky!? You’re messing with me, aren’t you?
Of course I am! Why would you ever believe someone like me? I’m crazy, after all!
>Ah fuck it, let's just deal with our current problems for now and we can over think this later.
Might Hel herself claim you, witch. I got better things to do then hear your twisted statements.
Aw, so you do like me? See, I told you he had a thing for me!
Um… sir, if you don’t have anything to do you should always waste some time talking with the captain. I’m sure the time would just fly away if you did.
…didn't I promise that I would break your thumb if you hurt me with your smite?
Please don’t hurt me, sir.
>Just head down to the meeting spot for this mission.
Hmmm, if you think I’m done here…

Insert 1… 2… 3… I declare a thumb war!_

>>560459
Of course we can't trust Pink's word unconditionally, but at the moment I'd be willing to give her more a benefit of the doubt than grey.

And if we need to compare information from multiple sources, a one time ally seems a decent place to try.

Well if you want to make a seen just smash the door on the way out, or all the doors on your way to the caption

...Yeah, you're done here. Slap the paladin on the back and say you wouldn't harm a brother in the Order, and in a sincere tone tell Vadoma to have a nice day. The crazy gal would probably take that as an insult, which is what I'm guessing you want, right?

What Vadoma said could be true, more or less. I do remember references to "tears" from before, and that they'd fall from the sky. We didn't know what they'd do, but it could very well have removed every grain of sand from the desert. Also, with fire magic and clever engineering it's entirely possible to build an airship based on the premise that hot air rises to generate lift, so that's also possible.

Find Captain Andrzej, ask him the questions about the Serath desert and the sultan, and get the mission brief. Maybe it'll turn out what Vadoma said isn't all that crazy.

>"You are currently allied with PINK in the past!"
...Wait, what? ...Bloody time travel shenanigans messing up our tenses. Well, are we or aren't we allied right now?

Ask if there is anyone around who would know about recent political events and be willing to talk about it.

>Thumbs
That was just "he does anything stupid", which he hasn't really. He did ask first, after all.

>"You are currently allied with PINK in the past!"
So we are forward in time. We should try to make sure we are also sideways in time, retroactively if necessary.