1/4 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)03:51 No. 334971 ID: c811c4
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"Minci! I'm coming, we're leaving!"
>"Leave me, you don't deserve this! I mean it, please!!"

>"Hahahaha! Oh my god, you actually ate it?! I'll just have to dissect you! Oh my god, this is hilarious! Well, that's the end of the road! You honestly think you can outrun me with a broken hussy?! I'm going t-"

2/4 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)03:51 No. 334972 ID: c811c4
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>"Where's my magic. Lich King. My magic. Your magic, whatever. I need it. Now. You're not giving it to me, are you. Are you?!

3/4 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)03:53 No. 334975 ID: c811c4
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>"You think this is fucking hilarious, don't you?! They're going to kill me now, you god damned maniac! You set me on a god damned pedestal so high I can't see the fuckin' ground, only to yank it out from underneath me at the worst imaginable point, you excreted sack of decrepit shitbones?! Don't fucking share your laughter in my head, now!!"

4/4 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)03:54 No. 334976 ID: c811c4
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>"I'm having trouble standing, DD... that attack sucked a lot of my energy."
"It's fine, just lean on me!"

Oh... oh, man... what do we do?

Make her even more wrong by letting her live.

Tell her off. Tell her she is a spoiled bitch. then leave.

>>334976
"Oy! Chee! Boss said it hadta look accidental, so if king's in yer head we dun gotta kill ya. If ya patch Minci up I'll buy ya a drink."

Let Minci have some of your energy since she needs it more. Also, how about you turn into something she can ride so she doesn't need to spend energy walking.

>>334976
She'll probably chase you while trying to convince the Lich King to give her power.

Right now your duty is to report what happened to Lokirm, and to keep Minci alive. Actually killing Chee is probably impossible since the Lich King will boost her just enough to keep her from dying while also fucking with her.

Optimally we'd want Minci to fool Chee into thinking we've shapeshifted and are running away. Lead her off into a different corridor then... escape, somehow.

On the other hand, you just ate an artifact that's supposed to be incredibly powerful, and Minci researched it. Ask her how to activate it. Maybe we can surprise the Lich King and/or Chee with whatever we manage to do with the thing.

1/2 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)04:30 No. 334984 ID: c811c4
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Oh, yeah. I barely even remember our lich wanted Chee dead! I can't even care about that. I wasn't even tasked with it, just to unearth the traitor, and with the artifact, this wasn't a failure for me. Oh, Minci... well, there's no reason for the Lich to know about her. I'll put the blame on Chee, somehow. We'll take our leave then. I just hope the lich lets me, being under his power.

"Hey Chee! We're leaving you alive! Consider yourself lucky, you spoiled bitch!"

Minci throws a few illusions around, and we lose Chee, leaving her to her devices. She's hurt, but medical attention isn't desperate, she's tougher than that. It takes awhile to get out, but in a daze, we're able to break through.

2/2 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)04:31 No. 334985 ID: c811c4
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It's the next morning. I'm going to visit Minci.

"How are you, Minci?"
>"I'm well! My energy is back, and my wounds are healing nicely!"
"Good! Say, do you know how to activate the artifact?"
>"I'm sorry, I don't. You probably shouldn't though, it's very unstable. There's no telling what'll happen, but we'll get it out of you! After all, you're a zombie, there's nothing hard about dissecting you. You should go, Duke."
"Why?"
>"Well, the Lich really does suspect me, I was forbidden to go into the dungeon. We got the artifact safely back, so he hasn't done anything to me yet, waiting for me to recover before he decides on a punishment. Still.. you shouldn't associate with me. But, DD... thank you!"

>>334985
Wrap your arms around her and give her a big kiss!
"The smart thing wouldn'ta brought us together; I'm tossin' my lot in with yours."

>>334985
Start trying to digest the artifact thingy.

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)04:53 No. 334988 ID: c811c4
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>>334986
Let me send you guys a mental image quick that I like to call my privacy.

>"Hee! You're really heavy, you know!"
"Hey, I take offense to that!"

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)04:54 No. 334989 ID: c811c4
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HICCUP

>"Heheh! I gave you the hiccups, huh?"

...

>"Uh, DD?"

>>334989
Get off the bed.
Run to the corner of the room.
Curl up in a ball.
Say "Magic gone bad. Keep back."

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)04:58 No. 334991 ID: c811c4
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Meanwhile, in Duke's stomach.

>HICCUP

FWOOMF

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:00 No. 334994 ID: c811c4
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I-I can't move...

>HICCUP

FWOOMF

>>334993
NOPE
NOPE
NOPE
NOPE

GET TO MINIMUM SAFE DISTANCE! RUN TO LICHBOSS!
DO NOT LET MINCI BE NEAR THE DESTABILIZING SOUL VACUUM!

>>334994
Then say "run"!

>>334994
Say that you don't feel so well and then hilariously explode.

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:12 No. 334998 ID: c811c4
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With great effort, I'm able to move myself to the window.

"Minci. Run."
>"..I- if you say so, I won't question it! I'll go, just be alright!"

I'm going to hiccup... I won't be able to stop this one.

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:14 No. 334999 ID: c811c4
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>HICCUP

FWOOOOOMF

...Uh oh.

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:22 No. 335001 ID: c811c4
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AW

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:26 No. 335002 ID: c811c4
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YEAHHHH

I'm huuuuge!

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:34 No. 335003 ID: c811c4
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What the heck? I can.. it's weird, I can taste you guys! Creepy I know, but you guys are delicious!

>"Duke?!"

Hey, is that...

>>335003
You are huge and in love with Minci.
Protect her.
Love her.
Keep her safe.
No matter what else happens, this is something you must do. This is the task we bind you to.

Your nickname is now Tom. There will come a point in the future we will ask you to lead us to Minci, and you will do so. The consequences for failure are beyond your comprehension.

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:45 No. 335005 ID: c811c4
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"Minci! You're okay!"

>H-How can we get you back?!

"No idea! I'll think about it later, but I haven't eaten yet! In fact, I haven't eaten anything edible ever! And I'm really hungry."

"Hungry for souls."

>>335004
Everything in this post.

Are we gonna eat her soul?

>>335007
No.

>>335007
Maybe later

Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)05:58 No. 335010 ID: c811c4
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"But don't worry, not yours! If the Lich had any power over me, it's broken now. I'll help you run, you can hideaway, I'll come back someday, somehow, to find you after I've changed back!"
>"You promise...?
"I double zombie promise! Someday, but man, I am hungry, and I gotta get outta here before I go do something I regret!"
>"O-o-okay, then! You better keep it, or I'll really take ALL your souls next time! Goodbye, Duke..."

INTERMISSION 2 - BIRTH OF THE DEVOURER : END Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)06:08 No. 335011 ID: c811c4
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Haha, sorry you guys, you probably didn't need to see that!

"It's not goodbye, Minci. We're going to have a lot of fun later! See ya!"

WAIT, ASK HER WHERE SHE'S GONNA HIDE.

1/2 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)06:20 No. 335013 ID: c811c4
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"Oh my gosh! Tom! I was a real... a real..."

>>335011
Keep track of where she hides! Always know where she is!

2/2 Derrick Duke 2011/08/01(Mon)06:22 No. 335016 ID: c811c4
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>"Bitch? Haha, don't worry about it. A lot's happened since then, and I don't hold it against you! But now that you know, if we could fetch Minci, that would be grand. You have more to worry about than my love life or your past, so get back to sleep. We have a lich to destroy!"

EPILOGUE : END

>>335016
I wonder if we can send JUST Duke over to her...
Medium-term project: Swapping Duke's soul's place as the 'body' of the devourer with somebody else's, and making him a new body exactly like his old one only better.

TOM IS BEST CHARACTER
TWICE

Could someone explain to me just HOW THE FUCK did Lagotrope manage to swing things around like this? I mean, seriously, it was like he was predicting our every thought before he even made this intermission.

So.... do we call him Tom or Duke now?

soulless zombies are dumb. make a HUGE pit and put an illusion over it and they will just try to walk across and fall in the pit.

>>335041
Supporting this plan.

>>333679
Hey Tom, remember this?
>-A... note, asking to call someone with the accompanying rune alignment. I don't remember where I got this, odd. Too bad I dropped the orb!

DERRICK DUKE IS BEST DUKE

>>335041
Add spikes too. Because why the fuck not?

>>335040
Derrick 'Tom' Duke, the Devourer.

>>335039
Like I said in >>/questdis/350787, we figured out very early on that Duke is Tom, and from that point on we were deliberately aiming for this. Lagotrope didn't really ha
>>335055
HOLY SHIT Lagotrope confirmed for time traveler

>>335016
You know, getting your love life back on track as it is now would be really fucking creepy.

>>335105
Only if he tries to show his affection for Minci through Chee.