New Template Psithief 2011/07/18(Mon)03:52 No. 327469 ID: 3bad4c
File 131098634114.png - (42.85KB , 1060x891 , 34.png )

TOWN DESTROYED. +600XP. +200 POINTS.
• option #1: o
• option #2: ooooo
• neither: oo

"Hey," she says softly to the dragon.
>"Hmm. Yes, pet?" The dragon stirs from its rest.
"We need to talk."

Abed and the dragon talked for many hours. She told him of her desire for some of the more normal trappings of human life, and she negotiated her departure. They resolved to stay friends.
DIPLOMACY CHECK d20+7 VS DC 20 - FAILURE
However, Abed could not talk the dragon into taking her far from its lair, nor could she manage to get it to part with the coin from its hoard.
She did manage to keep some of the more useful items, and the dragon managed to appraise the nature of what she had found.
1x AMULET OF NATURAL ARMOUR +1 1X +1 DAGGER 1X +1 COMPOSITE LONGBOW (+2 STR BONUS) 1X LESSER CRYSTAL OF RETURN 1X DIMENSIONAL HAVERSACK 1X MITHRIL CHAIN SHIRT +1 1X CLOAK OF CHARISMA +2 1X HEALING BELT 1X DRAGON SPIRIT AMULET 1X RING OF COMMUNICATION 1X OIL OF GREATER MAGIC WEAPON +3 1X HAT OF DISGUISE 1X BROOCH OF SHIELDING 1X LESSER REVELATION CRYSTAL 1X PHYLACTERY OF FAITHFULNESS 1X SALVE OF SLIPPERYNESS 1X +1 DARKWOOD SHIELD 1X ARCANIST'S GLOVES 1X SCROLL OF RESTORATION 1X CRYSTAL OF BENT SIGHT 1X AMBER AMULET OF VERMIN, GIANT BEE 1X LEAST CRYSTAL OF MIND CLOAKING 1X AMBER AMULET OF VERMIN, GIANT WASP 1X SCROLL OF WATER BREATHING [ARCANE] 1X EVERLASTING RATIONS 2X SCROLL OF DISPEL MAGIC [DIVINE] 1X POTION OF BULL'S STRENGTH

This sure is a lotta stuff.

After goodbye sex Abed sets off to find riches and people to oppress and that kind of thing.
What shall she do? [Pick any of the following]
• Find a dangerous locale
• Find a big city
• Find a small city
• Find new party members
• Be a slut
• Kill a kitten
• Eat a pony
• Dance naked in the moonlight
• Invent a new language based on smells
• Build a house
• Accidently kill a kitten while building a house naked in the moonlight while singing in smells in a dangerous locale while hoping for new party members to come along who like to fuck
• Be interrupted from doing one/more of the above by some attractive elf with boobs

>>327469
Find a few new party members and then take over a small city. Or maybe a village if a small city seems like a too big deal right now. But killing shit and oppressing people is definately on the list. And for that you need henchmen and a place to oppress.

find small city. build house. dance naked on its roof.

also explain what some of those are. where does the crystal of return return? what does a phylactery of faithfulness do? do you have to take off the amulet of natural armor to use the amulets of vermin? crystal of bent sight? dragon spirit amulet? ring of communication? which scrolls can you use?

etc, etc.

Be a slut

>>/questdis/349705
Ask these nitty gritty questions in the discussion thread.

With Abed's KNOW DIRECTION AND LOCATION power she can find the nearest settlement easily enough, but she doesn't know how big it is.

She has, however, learnt a bit about the surrounding area from the dragon Valinoghtorklax.
Unfortunately she can't remember any of it right now.
KNOWLEDGE (GEOGRAPHY) - FAILURE

Its name DID sound elven, and the dragon had been eating a lot of elves.
Maybe it would be a bad idea to come directly from the dragon's lair?

equip equipment, attach crystals, and proceed civilizationways. if they ask, you'll tell them the dragon burned down your town without even having to make a bluff check.

>>327469
Hunt things. Build a hut in the forest.

Invent a new language based on smells. Dance along the road to civilization.

>>327485
Oh, and equip
1X LEAST CRYSTAL OF MIND CLOAKING
1X LESSER CRYSTAL OF RETURN
1X MITHRIL CHAIN SHIRT +1
1X CLOAK OF CHARISMA +2
1X HEALING BELT
1X BROOCH OF SHIELDING
1X +1 DARKWOOD SHIELD
1X CRYSTAL OF BENT SIGHT

We shall be a hunter.

Psithief 2011/07/18(Mon)06:35 No. 327490 ID: 3bad4c
File 131099610714.png - (252.60KB , 1060x891 , 35.png )

>>327485
>>327486
CRAFT (LANGUAGE) d20+3 - FAILURE PERFORM (DANCE) d20+2 - MEDIOCRE PERFORMANCE CRAFT (HUT) d20+3 - FAILURE SPOT d20+0 - NOTHING SPOT d20+0 - NOTHING SPOT d20+0 - NOTHING
Abed is incredibly useless at all of these things. All she knows how to do right now is kill things with a sword and fuck dragons.
It's also a very quiet day! No monsters are around at all.
>>327483
She makes good progress towards the elven 'whatever'.
It is now night.
Abed decides to hide in a tree to avoid being eaten in the night.
CLIMB d20+2-1 - FAILURE CLIMB d20+2-1 - SUCCESS CLIMB d20+2-1 - SUCCESS CLIMB d20+2-1 - SUCCESS
After a false start, Abed manages to climb a nearby tree and goes to sleep.

Psithief 2011/07/18(Mon)06:50 No. 327493 ID: 3bad4c
File 131099701369.png - (120.84KB , 1060x891 , 36.png )

Abed wakes up.
She can't get out of her sleeping bag/bedroll.
STRENGTH CHECK d20+2 - FAILURE
"Hello? Is anyone there? I'm STUCK!"
She shifts around, she seems to be moving back and forward.
What's going on?

Psithief 2011/07/18(Mon)07:19 No. 327494 ID: 3bad4c
File 131099877796.png - (193.06KB , 1060x891 , 37.png )

She manifests KNOW DIRECTION AND LOCATION.
The power reveals to her that she is IN the elven settlement!
Abed gives up on trying to burst out and uses the dagger to cut a hole.
It's early morning. She appears to be in a wooden cage.
How did I get here? Why didn't I wake up?!
There's an elven guard nearby. S/He's not currently looking at her.
..nice arse though.
The cage seems to be at least 30 metres off the ground. She might survive that kind of fall.
What to do?

>>327494

you're preggers. don't jump.

>>327494
Free yourself from the bedroll, gather your things, then climb up on top of the cage and make the short hop to land next to the elf.
"Excuse me, but do you know why I'm so dreadfully high above the ground?"

>>327496
the lack of a roof is obviously just so we can see the inside easily. otherwise where would that rope be attached to? get your stuff and say hi to that elf.

>>327494
Cut yourself out of the bag as sneakily as you can, then try to nail the elf in the back of the head with your dagger, after which you should drink the strength potion and try to get those bars out of the way.

Once your free you should survey your surroundings and see if there's anything in particular that is noteworthy.

>>327498
To add something, if the power of the potion isn't enough to get past the bars, then try the salve of slipperiness to slip through.

Psithief 2011/07/18(Mon)09:21 No. 327524 ID: 3bad4c
File 131100607761.png - (186.64KB , 1060x891 , 38.png )

>>327496
>>327498
>>327499
Faced with multiple options Abed does her best to combine them into one course of action.
Okay.. get out of the bedroll, pack up my stuff, unlock the cage, open the cage, jump onto the elf and threaten him with a weapon, and ask him why I'm here. If I don't like the answer she dies.
Abed still doesn't know the sex of the elf.
MOVE SILENTLY d20+2 VS OPPOSED LISTEN d20+0 - FAILURE
The elf doesn't turn around. She seems to be paying attention though. Is he not allowed to look?
MANIFEST PSIONIC KNOCK MOVE SILENTLY d20+2 VS OPPOSED LISTEN d20+0 - FAILURE
The cage unlocks, so Abed pushes it open. The cage door knocks against the wooden platform!
BALANCE d20+8 - SUCCESS
The elf turns around, but it's too late! Scimitar in hand, Abed leaps!
INITIATIVE d20+6 - FIRST TO ACT
Abed pushes the poor elf over!
"Surrender!"
She puts the scimitar to the elf's throat. Oh, it's a man.
>"Ahh! Don't!"
"Why am I here?!" She yells.
>"I don't know! I was only supposed to guard, I'm not supposed to talk!"
"Wrong answer." Before she stabs him she pauses and listens.
Abed looks around. She sees other elves scattered around. She seems to be attracting attention.
Hmm.
I was coming here anyway.. so they saved me from having to walk.
This is a sticky situation. Were they just defending their borders? Didn't she want to come here and ..do things?
Now she doesn't know what to think, or do.

I like the stab-happy thing you have going on Abed, but that was pretty damn thoughtless. I recommend immediate escape. Even if you can kill them all you will certainly have some injuries. You should find your stuff too though.

[All Abed's stuff is still with Abed. It was in the bottom of her sleeping bag.]

>>327527
i don't think we've stabbed him yet, so uh

don't stab him!

seriously man, stop it with the stabbings that can be traced back to you. now you'll never take over this town.

(>>327532 This is correct.)

DO NOT STAB ELF. Respond angrily and with anger.
Also, STABBING WITH A SCIMITAR!? THAT IS SILLY.

don't lower your blade from his throat and wait until you're noticed and approached. the attention you've attracted might bring some people with answers.

Molest Him!

>>327524
All right, if you've still got your stuff then it's a decent bet that they weren't actually planning anything particularly nefarious. I mean, honestly, who imprisons someone with a bunch of magical gear on them and expects them to stay imprisoned?

At the same time, they absconded with you in your sleep and put you in a cage, which is just not polite. So you have a right to be angry. Do not kill them, but demand answers and apologies for their rude actions.

>>327524
Hold him hostage. Find out what's going on. We might not be in that much trouble yet, and we're in the middle of a bunch of elves so fighting our way out might not work well.

do non-evil things for a little bit! it'll serve you better to look reasonable and sane

>>327524
Hmm, elven lands seems like a bit of a bust. Feels like we're not going to accomplish much here right now. Unless we can kill them all, that might be possible with the sweet loot stuff we got.

Eh what the hell, lets go for it. Summon the giant bee and hornet, kill this dude, drink the strength potion and then it's time to fuck shit up. Oh, and shapeshift into something more fitting for a fight. Time to fuck them all up, and if that's not possible then run in the confusion and chaos.

>>327524
Ok, back off, and manifest your BLUFF BOOST!
Say "Sorry. Just, finding myself in a cage so soon after escaping from-" then just trail off into muffled sobs as you tear up.

Psithief 2011/07/19(Tue)00:38 No. 327942 ID: 3bad4c
File 131106113029.png - (163.98KB , 1060x891 , 39.png )

>>327666
Abed isn't quite awesome enough to feel she can successfully take on all the elves.
Maybe in a few levels.

>>327549 Don't stab him
>>327569 Don't kill them
>>327662 Do non-evil things
>>327738 Tear up
*sigh*
MANIFEST CONCEAL THOUGHTS CONCEAL MANIFESTATION DISPLAY; TAKE 10+8 VS DC 15 - SUCCESS
Abed tosses her scimitar a short distance away so she'll have a hand free. She offers it to the prone elf as she says, "I'm sorry."
OPPOSED BLUFF CHECK d20+11 VS SENSE MOTIVE d20+1 - SUCCESS
She helps the elf up, and immediately changes the action into a hug. It's a bit awkward with a big shield strapped to her left arm, but she manages.
"I've just had a hard few.. *sniff* after escaping from-", she starts sobbing into the elf's shoulder.
She's relieved to feel the elf embrace her back.
>>327565
She moves her right hand down and grabs the elf's buttock.
Hehe
He seems calm and relaxed and breathing deeply. One of the nice things about knowing how to shapeshift is one smells pretty good most of the time.
>>327636 Hold hostage
After she's had a bit of a feel, she let's go of his arse and summons her scimitar back to her hand. The elf, not being able to see behind his own back, doesn't notice.
"What's your name?" She says between sniffles.
>"I'm Maldrimir. What's yours?" He's probably kinda horny right now. Even through the mithril chain shirt it's obvious Abed has the biggest boobs in the settlement.
Oh, uh..Lilly again?
"I'm Lilly."
>>327472
DIPLOMACY d20+7 VS DC 20 - SUCCESS ELF IS NOW HELPFUL!
"Can you take me somewhere safe?" She asks in an unsteady voice.
>"Uh..yeah. Sure. I'll take you to my place."
Abed properly slings her pack over her shoulder and is let away by Mal. She feels pretty sexy.
Staring at his arse, she ponders.
I still prefer girls, but.. these elves are pretty girly, and I am stuck like this for a while..
She decides to stop rationalising.
Your old life is gone, Abed, and all the little social pressures along with it. Also, you're already pregnant, how could it get any worse?
She smiles to herself.

They arrive at Maldrimir's place. It's a spacious elven home, all kinda woody and curved.
Her shield and scimitar clatter to the floor as they approach the bedroom. Abed's just getting her chain shirt off when Mal stops.
She quickly realises the bed is already occupied.
>"Oh. Thaae. This is Lilly. Lilly, this is my friend Thaae."
Thaae is an elven woman wearing a sultry black negligee, and she's lying across Maldrimir's bed. She looks PISSED OFF.
Oh. Was he not even supposed to be guarding me?
Run away, or stand her ground? Or something riduculous?

>>327942
suggest threesome

>>327942
Introduce yourself as a wandering murderhobo looking for a new place to call home, ask if they have any pest problems that need extermination, like maybe a goblin village or something.

>>327951
Seconded

Wow. Is this guy stupid or what? Introduce yourself as a WANDERING WANDERER who recently escaped from fiery death after the dragon incinerated your hometown. Funnily e nough, this is the truth.

Put your shirt back on you saucy tart.

Play it off as you were going to put on a different shirt or something. Or hell, you could actually put on a different shirt.

Psithief 2011/07/19(Tue)05:32 No. 328007 ID: 3bad4c
File 131107875381.jpg - (11.20KB , 200x182 , VATKSUO6EESGAPCWKL4BFYMBHFS4PD4Q_1_.jpg )

Abed blinks, her mind wandering back to the present.
>>328004
It's a bit late for that now.
Thaae is still berating Mal in Elven. Abed is pretending not to understand, she's just been staring at Thaae's chest.
>"<- and Cydrimhel said it would only be for a few hours. Anyway, she escaped and-" Mal continues.
>Thaae interrupts. "<She was inside the cage? She was in there for a reason, Maldrimir!>"
Maldrimir looks at Abed briefly. Oops..did he notice I was staring at her?
>Thaae continues. "<The scouts found that bag and fought off a monstrous spider. She was put in the cage because she detects as evil!>"
Ohhhh.
>>328003
Maybe he's stupid, or maybe just no one cares to inform him.
>Maldrimir pauses for a beat, then asks, "<How evil?>"
>Thaae replies, "<Just the faintest amount. She's not worshipping evil, but she could be a murderer for all we know.>"
>"<The poor girl seems like she's been through a lot. She did threaten me, but she apologised. She definitely has a temper.>"
The conversation lulls for a few moments.
Abed notices they're looking at her again.
>>327951
>>327985
"Um.." she squeaks, looking at Thaae. "You're beautiful."
Thaae's expression softens, and she seems to appraise Abed.
>"Come here, Lilly." She opens her arms for a hug.
Abed walks over and embraces Thaae, and then steals a long kiss.
When their lips part they both look back at Maldrimir. He is looking a little pleased and a little confused.
>"<You're forgiven, Maldrimir. Join us. She smells really nice, by the way.>"
Now he's just a lot pleased.



Abed supposes this would be pillow talk now. Elves don't really have pillows, they seem to do their meditative trance sitting upright. So this is really just sorta sweaty talk now.
>"So Lilly, tell us about yourself," Thaae suggests, as her left hand 'walks' up and down Abed's side.
"Oh. Heh. Um, my name's not actually Lilly. It's Abed."
>"Isn't that a boy name?" Mal asks.
"Yeah, it is. I used to be a boy."
>"Magical curse?" asks Thaae.
"Something like that, yeah."
>"That explains so much," Mal exclaims.
>"Oh you had no idea, you liar." Thaae giggles.
"Yeah. I'm glad you're both fine with that. I'm still more attracted to girls. Well, mostly only girls. Hey, is it true all elves are bisexual?"
>"Well, that's almost true. We're all attracted to elves of either sex. Outside of our own race though we definitely do have our preferences."
>"Of course, Abed, you're just so attractive that even Thaae wants you."
I really like this place.
"So is it true all dwarves are straight then?"
>"You'd have to ask a dwarf."
"Okay, alright. So..about me huh?"
>"Please do."
"Okay. Um. Well I had a nice few early years, but then my mother died. My father married again but she wasn't very nice. In a private place kinda way. I blame her for a lot of my problems."
>"Like pushing me over and holding that sword to my throat?" Mal asks.
There's a cough from Thaae.
Okay, maybe Mal is a bit dumb.
"Yeah. Sorry again." She adds a reassuring grope.
"Anyway, I was a bit violent but I learnt to do violence properly. Bit of psi too. Learnt to change my shape. I think I have a few hang-ups about being me.
I really like pretending I'm someone else."
>"You poor dear." Thaae hugs Abed.
"Then the dragon came and burnt down everything. I.. well. I got to another town. That one burnt down too." She sobs a bit for effect.
Thaae and Mal talk over her quietly.
>"<The dragon!>"
>"<Don't upset her, Mal! I like her.>"
>"<I like her too but is she a danger to us?>"
>"<Look, I'll just ask, okay?>"
>"Abed. What do you want to do now that you're here?"
"Um. Well, I'd like to be friends with both of you. Maybe get some work? I am alright with a sword. There's always monster problems, right?"
>"Yeah, yeah there are." "<I think she'll be fine, Mal.>"
"Will you take me to find some local mercenary types? It's dangerous to go alone."
Thaae nods. She gets off the bed and gets something from a nearby drawer.
>"Take this."
Sweet!

>>328007
Any dragon semen still in you? Think you could use your powers to move it over to her?
Also, what did they give you?

life's good, innit? don't look too happy now, you just had your town burned down.

let's do mercenary work. gain some power. we'll soon establish a base here to take over the world.

>>328007
Cool, finally you got some underpants.

Ok, looks like this can be your base for now. Lets find some mercenary murderhobo types to team up with then and start killing monsters and shit. After which we can take over this place and rule it with a hedonistic iron fist.

Psithief 2011/07/19(Tue)08:00 No. 328020 ID: 3bad4c
File 131108765552.png - (378.38KB , 1060x891 , 40.png )

(Oh, and..)
THREESOME. +20 POINTS. ITEMS ACQUIRED: 1x PINK PANTIES
Abed's up and dressed. Thaae's leading her to the nearest adventurer den.
Oh wow. This place is beautiful.

Character creation time!
Is it time to add someone else to the party? Abed's looking for friends to help her wreak havoc or kill slimes. Whatever's available!
Help design the next character!
See the discussion thread.
>>/questdis/349705

Psithief 2011/07/21(Thu)08:17 No. 328963 ID: 3bad4c
File 131126145925.png - (110.87KB , 1060x891 , 41.png )

This is Versparki Arisha.
She is mysterious.
Powerful.

Wait, what? You already know she's only third level? And you can see her face in the status bar?
Damn.

Where was I..
Versparki is dead.
She doesn't breathe, eat, sleep or poop.
There is no life, no warmth and no compassion within her.
Yet, she moves. She thinks. She conspires.

She has been waiting here. Waiting for someone.
It could be anyone. All that matters is that they have power, and can be manipulated.

Many adventurers have come through this tavern, but Versparki is waiting for that certain someone.
Someone alone.
Naive.
Someone with no goals.
No friends.
No home.
No one to miss them.

Now her wait is coming to an end.
A woman has entered the tavern.
As with all newcomers, Versparki scans her for magic.
She glows brightly.
She's looking around, unsure. She's not here to meet someone in particular.
Versparki can be that no one in particular.

It is time to leave the dark corner.
What approach would lure this one the best?

TEAR OFF YOUR SHIRT, YOU PITIFULLY NAIVE ABOMINATION!

Seriously, Abed Dragonfucker is pretty damn dangerous.

>>328963
Promises of bloodshed and loot. Possibly also hot sexings, but the blood and loot is more important.

Offer her sex

>>328963
What, are you retarded or something? Have you been sitting there all this time because you couldn't figure out how to use those oh-so-complicated meat sticks attached to your ass?
This is not fucking brain surgery, just walk the fuck over and say hi.

You know what? Fuck WALKING over. Do an acrobatic fucking pirouette over there. Say hi. Offer ADVENTURE!

And be careful. They might secretly be a shapeshifting badass or something.

Psithief 2011/07/21(Thu)11:24 No. 329019 ID: 3bad4c
File 131127266174.png - (149.06KB , 1060x891 , 42.png )

I think this one is a bit of an exhibitionist.
The woman is seated, but before she sat she made a show of removing her mail shirt.
Whistles of appreciation could be heard from the taverngoers.

Versparki heads over to the table.
"Hello, adventurer."
>"Hi."
Is she showing me her panties on purpose?
"I am Versparki, and I am a mage."
>"I'm Abed." She adjusts her bust. "Like these? I designed them myself."
Uh..
"They're exceptional, I'm sure. In any case-"
The woman interrupts, "Oh right! Yeah, I forgot. I'm a warrior, pretty much. I came here looking for a crew, a band, a party, whatever they're called.
Are you hiring?"

It wasn't usually that easy. The typical adventurer was unusual at best, but this one seemed unusually confident. No matter, none of them lastest long in the end.
The 'job' was the same one she'd done dozens of times. Each time she got a little closer to her goal, one step further on the path made of the corpses of her former allies.

[Switch to Abed's POV]
Work is work, I guess. Too bad she doesn't wanna fuck.
Is two really going to be enough? I mean there are some quiet ones in here, not much to look at though.
Should Abed look for more people, or does she want to get a bigger share of the reward?

>>329019
Should be ok with just her. And if you work on it a bit then she might come around. Not everyone is as hedonistic as you.

>>329019
Take her somewhere private and tell her you don't work with anybody who won't go for an occasional roll in the hay. Tell her you can't trust a team to watch your ass if they don't have a vested interest in it.
Then shove your tongue down her throat.

Bracing for hilarity in 3... 2... 1...

>>329026
...Dammit, I know this is a TERRIBLE IDEA, but I can't stop. And I really wanted Abed to survive this quest too. DO IT.

>>329026

Make sure you cop a good feel of her titties too.

>>329026
This, do this.
And remember, necrophilia is just a really intense desire to crack open a cold one

>>329019
Don't hit on the undead unless you want to become lichloved.

>>329263
The internet says you need an evil brand for that

>>329019
Don't fuck the undead.

>>329311
But Abed doesn't know she's undead. Yet :3

Psithief 2011/07/22(Fri)06:45 No. 329468 ID: 3bad4c
File 131134233857.png - (285.97KB , 1060x891 , 43.png )

I wonder what she looks like under that robe. It must be damn hot in there.
Well, if she's pretty then I am so going to ..heh
Abed's train of thought trails off into a haze of pervy thoughts.

Abed follows Versparki as she leads them through the forest down an old overgrown path.
It's a long trek and Versparki says little.
It gets dark, and they reach a river.
>"We cross here," says Versparki, disinterestedly.
Ha! I'll get to see what she looks like now, she won't want to get her big robe all soak- fuck.
Abed's line of thought turns to annoyance as Versparki walks along the surface of the water.
Fucking magic.
"Well, looks like I'm getting wet," Abed calls out. "Can we camp on the other bank? I may as well wash all this sweat off."
>"Fine."
"What about you?"
>"I do not need to."
Figures. She looks at her hand. Well, tonight doesn't have to be a total loss.

[Switch - Versparki]
This is ridiculous. Versparki hasn't had anyone along before that's this shameless.
>"Mmm."
Versparki had thought her delicate sensibilities had died with her, but then she'd never been around someone who acted like this since then.
>"Haaah."
It is more than a little annoying.
>"Oo. *pant*"
Only three more souls to go.
>"*long, stuttered exhale*"
It will be worth it.
>"Goodnight Versparki."
A long night will be coming for Abed soon enough.

[Switch - Abed]
Abed sneezes herself awake in the middle of the night.
She looks around. She can barely make out the dark robe nearby.
Versparki seems to just be standing around.
Really? Doesn't she even sleep?
Abed sneakily gets out of her bedroll and leaves as if to go urinate in privacy.
Instead she doubles back, approaching the standing figure from behind.
Alright lady, you don't have to be so aloof anymore.
Abed puts her cunning plan into action, and grabs Versparki's boobs from behind. She jiggles them slightly.
>"What are you doing?"
"I'm just reminding you what a good time feels like. Lemme into your robe."
Versparki takes Abed's wrists and removes them from their grip on the front of her robe.
Aah! Cold hands! Cold hands!
>"Go back to sleep." Her tone has not changed at all.
"Okay! Okay!"
So cold.
Abed snoozes until morning.

>>329468
Abed, ask her where she's leading you and what kinda thing she wants killed or captured.

Also? She's cold and doesn't sweat. What IS she?

>>329468
Hmm, something is definately funky with that elf. Better keep your guard up, she might try something bad on you later, probably a good idea of you take some precautions to guard yourself against enemy mind mojo and keep the elf in sight at all times.

Not much else to do besides that. Get the task done, get paid for it, spend cash on magic trinkets, ale and whores. Then find another job, repeat until you got a bunch of halfway trustworthy minions and then it's time to take over some place. Or maybe just raid and pillage.

>>329468
Be on your guard. Scary people in dark robes who don't sleep or eat and have no body temperature can mean only one thing. VAMPIRES! Be careful, this looks like a Daywalker, like Dracula, meaning they are immensely dangerous and powerful. Go along with them for now, but stay on your guard.

Psithief 2011/07/22(Fri)09:11 No. 329487 ID: 3bad4c
File 131135110583.png - (192.64KB , 1060x891 , 44.png )

The sun comes up and Abed rises, then prepares her mind and body for the day of adventuring ahead.
Versparki seems unchanged. It's unnerving, Abed starts to wonder if she's actually a construct or an elemental or something.
Maybe she's part ice?

Another half-day's travel sees the pair to an old stone entranceway that runs underground. It's overgrown with moss, vines and generally uncared for. There are recent tracks going in and out of this area.
"Have you been here before, Versparki?"
>"Yes, many times. However, I cannot accomplish the next objective on my own, nor hope to carry the reward with me."
"Oh, that's nice. Why hire me and not some labourer from the village?"
>"It may not be entirely safe in there, dangers seem attracted to this place."
"Ah, good. I'll be ready."

They step into the darkness, Abed leading the way, torch tied to her shield.
Every step there is a crunching sound underfoot. Abed crouches to investigate. The floor is covered with bones, all humanoid and entirely scattered.
Interesting.
It's otherwise quiet.

They continue until they reach a small circular chamber. It's lit from magic gemstones embedded in the floor. They form a circle that runs close to the walls. Three gems in the floor are dim.
In the centre of the room is a pedestal with a chest upon it. It's covered by a glass-like cylinder that rises almost to the ceiling. There's a mechanism near the ceiling, but it's too dark to see much detail even with the torch.
On either side of the pedestal are two levers embedded in the floor. They stand one and a half metres high.
"So what's the goal here, Versparki?"
>"We each take a lever, uncovering the chest. Then, with your strength, it can be carried out. I am too frail to manage it on my own."
It sounds plausible enough, but there's something bothering Abed.
So many skeletons. It doesn't look like much of a tomb, too chaotic. Versparki has been here many times, but is only now retrieving this chest?
And she doesn't want sex! Gah!
"No."
>"What?"
"I'm not doing it."
>"Why not!"
Versparki seems to have finally lost her cool.
Ah huh?
"Because you think I'm ugly!"
>"Wha? What does-"
"You do!"
>"No, I-"
"I hate you! You won't even look me in the eye! Show me your face!"
>"I will no-"
"Do it or I'll kill you where you stand!" Abed raises her scimitar threateningly and drops her shield to the floor.
>"I don't need you! I will find others." She seems to be casting a spell!
Abed swings at the mage, but the swing goes wide. The spell hits her, and she feels her strength draining away.
Yelling with rage Abed swings again, but she is sidestepped. The mage touches her arm, and she feels cold.
"I will not die here!" A mighty swing cuts deep into the mage.
>"You have won," the mage says, then slumps to the ground. Wisps of fog seem to escape from the hole she cut into the robe.
Abed waits for a moment, but Versparki does not move any more.

Abed is feeling better after a few minutes. Strong again.
She paces around the room, investigating corners, engravings and other things.
"I still don't get it."
>"No, you don't."
The robe has moved! Abed thought it was over.
"You're alive!?"
>"No. I am not. I was dead before we met." Versparki makes no attempt to get up.
"Oh. Ohhhhh. I'm sorry I groped you then."
A dry laugh comes from the robe.
>"Do not be sorry. I was going to sacrifice you here, as I have done with so many others."
Abed looks around. "All these lights?"
>"Yes.. souls to fuel the portal."
"That's so.. evil."
>"Yes."
"Why didn't you just creep away, or stay still?"
>"You would have noticed, or tried to find out what was under my hood. I just wanted this chance to tell you that you won."
There is the better part of a minute of silence, as Abed decides how she feels about this.
"Do you want to be friends?"
A shorter silence.
>"What?"
"I've had a really really horrible time lately. Kidnapped, forced to aid in murder, kidnapped again. Bad things just keep happening to me. The weird thing is though, I've turned the people abusing me into friends. I may as well offer you the same chance."
>"You are strange."
"No, I'm damaged. Offer stands."
Suddenly Abed bursts into tears. She starts sobbing violently.
Confused, Versparki gets up and approaches.
"I'm sorry," Abed says weakly. "I need to borrow you for a sec."
Abed buries her face in the robe on Versparki's shoulder.
She continues to cry for a few minutes.

"I.. guess I just need to be around people." Abed explains, as she attempts to psychoanalyze herself.
"I lost everything. Recent..and so long ago. I don't think I can be alone. I'll fall apart."
Versparki responds with silence.
"I'm sorry Versparki, maybe we'll come back later and sacrifice some really nasty creatures, okay? I'm sure we can find suitable creatures that are completely unloveable."
>"I'm not capable of-"
"I know! It's alright. I'll be your friend now. I'll help you. I mean, it might take a while, but you've got a lot of time. Power and training never hurt anyone."
>"You are incredibly strange."
"You're right. I'm strange, and you're my strange dead friend. We're going to go make ourselves powerful and impressive and all kinds of cool stuff."
>"... I-"
"I like you too."

>>329487
No sense waiting around.
"Well, lets start gathering your sacrifices. Bandits should work, right?
Hmm... We should probably find something to make you warm to the touch, though. Gloves will help until then."

Psithief 2011/07/22(Fri)09:53 No. 329501 ID: 3bad4c
File 131135361493.png - (158.41KB , 1060x891 , 45.png )

"So uh..what's in the chest?"
>"Treasure, collected from all those who died before you."
"So what's the trick?"
>"The chest will suck out your soul if you touch it. I had to be nearby when it occurred."
"Ohhh. Nice trick."
Abed ponders.
"Tell you what, we'll take the treasure and put it to use."
>"For power?"
"Yes, power! I hit you once and almost rekilled you, so don't go thinking you don't need more."
>"I understand."

Abed and Versparki free the chest, and Versparki opens it and empties the contents onto the floor.
"Wow."
>"Yes."
They fill Abed's dimensional pack with the loot.
"We should go make sure we're properly outfitted for winning. Want to return to the town?"
>"I do."
They start heading back. As they reach sunlight again Versparki puts her hand on Abed's shoulder.
>"Thank you."
Abed grins.
"Let me tell you, Versparki, our names are going to be feard and awed."
>"We should not destroy the town."
"Oh, I know, right? Don't crap in your own backyard. Let's buy a map though, plan our conquest or whatever."

What criteria would make a good starting point?

What items did you get? Also, I'd suggest a smallish village that has at least a magic shop and blacksmith. Wipe it off the map.

>>329508

bit too much for two tevel threes, no?

I'd go acquire some sort of 'den' to store the shit we've got. prefereby an inconspicious and cheap one. it's a bit too much to lug around all the time, no?

and then get raiding people to capture for souls. again, inconspiciously. maybe kinda like a highwayman. we only need three, anyway.

>>329501
Lets kill people that the elves hate so the elves will love us. Go after criminals or something.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)02:06 No. 330007 ID: 3bad4c
File 131141198735.png - (163.81KB , 1060x891 , 46.png )

The pair return to La'themi and immediately go on a shopping spree.
They arrange for a disguise item for versparki that won't interfere with her incarnate powers, and they buy a ring to allow the two of them to contact one another over a short distance.
Abed gives Versparki her unworn gloves and cloak, as she would likely make better use of them.

It appears that Versparki doesn't have a home in town, she just stays in or around the den all the time.
For the moment all the gems and coins fit in Abed's magic pack. It's getting a little bit full though.

Abed returns to the adventurer den. There's a notice board nearby she only glanced at before.
• A reward for information on the dragon.
• Assistance requested with a plague that's approaching the town.
• Something about underground caverns and people going missing. Underground trip?
• Rewards for killing certain types of snakes - fiery snakes, evil snakes, construct snakes­.

There's no mention of any bounties for specific humanoid type people.

>>330007
Lets go for trip underground. Maybe we can encounter some deep gnomes or something. Something with a soul that can be used as a sacrifice anyway. Oh, you should probably ask what sort of portal it is that would be opened. It's usually a good idea to know what you're letting through.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)04:32 No. 330034 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142073375.png - (100.72KB , 1060x891 , 47.png )

>>330009
Should I ask her about the portal? Nah. She needs to know that I trust her. I think. Hrmm. She needs me. She'll tell me when she's ready.
Nobody seems to have any idea what's taking these people, so we can't prepare any specific defences. Time to be brave!

After some hours of searching they find the site of the latest disappearance. Neither has any experience with tracking, so they split up and wander.

­­­"I've found a hole in the ground."
Versparki's remote voice comes to Abed clear thanks to the magic of the rings.
>"Can you descend?"
"I will try."
­­­­
Crash!­
­
"Okay, I'm down."

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)04:44 No. 330036 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142147233.png - (103.96KB , 1060x891 , 48.png )

Abed tells Versparki the landmarks she passed on the way to the hole.
After half an hour Versparki calls down from above.
"Just jump! I'll catch you!"
>"Alright."

Crash!­

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)04:54 No. 330037 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142206513.png - (201.65KB , 1060x891 , 49.png )

Okay, so Versparki can see in the dark and heal herself? What's been holding her back? I'm supposed to be protectingher!
>"Abed. I've found a corpse. I'm going to animate it, it will serve as a scout and decoy for us."
"Yeah? Yeah! That sounds great Versparki. I'm sorry about catching you."
>"Abed. It is fine."

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)05:05 No. 330039 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142270363.png - (216.27KB , 1060x891 , 50.png )

Abed can hear the corpse rise up, but she can't see it yet.
>"I serve, master."
>"Protect my friend Abed. She cannot see in the dark."
>"As you will it, master."

My new friend is awesome. Am I jealous? No..no! Of course not.

You are not jealous. Your new comrade is awesome. Team Up to take on the world.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)05:17 No. 330044 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142347113.png - (135.56KB , 1060x891 , 51.png )

I mean she gets to be awesome and I get to have lots of sex, that's hardly fair for her.
They wander in silence, the animated corpse holding the torch and leading the way.
"We didn't bring anything to mark our passage."
>"We could use coins."
"Oh. No, let's not worry about that right now."

Abed strains her eyes in the dim torchlight looking for clues.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)05:31 No. 330046 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142429382.png - (176.08KB , 1060x891 , 52.png )

Suddenly it's dark!
"What happened?!"
>"Ooze!"
Oh no! A gelatinous cube got the corpse!
It's completely dark! Abed can't see anything!

can't think of anything effective against it but dissolving spittle, and that only works if it isn't immune to acid.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)05:58 No. 330050 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142589476.png - (51.93KB , 1060x891 , 53.png )

>"Flee, Abed! You can't do anything here!"
"Versparki..!"
>"Go!"

Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap!
Abed flees as best she can in the total darkness.
She can hear sizzling behind her where Versparki was.

Noooo...

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)06:08 No. 330052 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142651657.png - (162.98KB , 1060x891 , 54.png )

[Switch - Versparki]
Fortunately oozes are slow and only immune to their own digestive acids.
It takes half a minute of backing away and spitting acid at it, but the ooze finally dissolves into a moist sticky puddle.
The necrocarnum zombie is now destroyed.

Versparki's friend is nearby, she seems upset.

she's probably worried about you. grope her ass to cheer her.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)06:36 No. 330055 ID: 3bad4c
File 131142821158.png - (91.66KB , 1060x891 , 55.png )

GELATINOUS CUBE DEFEATED. +300XP. +2 POINTS.
Yes, Abed definitely likes to communicate with touch. Versparki hasn't done that in a while though.
"Abed." Versparki gently touches Abed's rear.
>"Versparki! Oh gods. I'm so glad you're still undead."
Even when overwhelmed the girl has a quick wit, this pleases Versparki for some reason.
"Do you-"
>"No.. I don't have any more torches."
You underprepared, girl.
>"Is there anything of interest, any loot?"
"I will check."
ITEMS ACQUIRED: 40gp 1x spinel 1x clasp
"No light sources."
>"I'm sorry Versparki."

>>330055
Well this could probably be solved, ask Abed to transform into something that has low light or night vision. Bam, problem solved.

Hmm, I guess that hole and cube together could account for quite a bit of disapperances. But these passages look a bit artifical, probably worth it to explore them a bit more.

>>330055
Abed: Don't elves have darkvision? That would work for seeing in the dark.
Also, you'd probably get a thrill out of being an elf pregnant with the spawn of the elves most terrible nemesis.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)08:04 No. 330062 ID: 3bad4c
File 131143349549.png - (55.31KB , 1060x891 , 56.png )

[Switch - Abed]
>>330058
>>330061
Abed can only look like something that can see in the dark, she can't actually see in the dark otherwise.
She also hasn't told Versparki that she can change her shape.
It sure it dark.
Maybe she'll just hold onto the back of Versparki? There has to be another way out.

>>330062
Don't magic items tend to glow?
When you get back to town go buy a Helm of Darkvision or something, but for now just keep a hand on your friend so you don't get lost.

Necromancer, see if there are any corpses around that you could animate and then light on fire.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)08:21 No. 330066 ID: 3bad4c
File 131143447790.png - (79.59KB , 1060x891 , 58.png )

Yeah, it is pretty unlucky that none of Abed's sweet loots glow in any way. She figures that all the glowing ones are still on the store shelves because no adventurer wants to not have complete control of how much they glow in the dark.
If there was a pair of goggles of night on sale in the town then maybe she could have persuaded Versparki to buy them.
The town isn't rich enough to have those sort of things for sale though. No demand, no supply.

Dark dark dark.

Versparki is being really nice, letting Abed use her as a guide. Apart from the lack of sex, Versparki might be her best friend ever!
Wait, what's that?

>>330066
Light, it seems.

No demand doesn't mean no supply, it means low supply. There also IS demand because adventurers gather around here, and adventurers will both buy and sell magic items even if there's no local market for them.
It's worth looking into, but for now?
"Versparki, what do your unelf eyes see?"

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)09:09 No. 330071 ID: 3bad4c
File 131143734417.png - (164.33KB , 1060x891 , 59.png )

[Switch - Versparki]
Abed tugs at Versparki.
Versparki taps Abed's hand, then starts casting a spell as quietly as she can manage.

The light is approaching. Abed seems confident again. She's let go and has her sword and shield ready to murderise whatever comes around that corner.
That's good. Well, it's Evil, but it's a good thing.

What is it, though?
A skeleton pops into reality in front of Versparki. It's only going to last twenty-four seconds before it pops out again. This needs to be over fast.

The creature rounds the corner. It's a small, ugly squat thing reminiscent of a dwarf.

>>330071
Hey, that looks like a promising sacrifice. Tell Abed to try to take it alive, doesn't have to be intact though, minus a hand or two is also fine.

Should be doable for her.

good idea. lop off its hands. and feet.

Psithief 2011/07/23(Sat)10:49 No. 330084 ID: 3bad4c
File 131144339471.png - (114.34KB , 1060x891 , 60.png )

*SCHINK*
>>330073
Nevermind.
DERRO DEFEATED. +300XP. +2 POINTS.
"Abed."
>"Hmm?"
"The portal."
>"Oh! I thought we were actually investigating here."
She looks over the bleeding derro.
>"It's not dead yet. Are you sure you don't want to animate it? There's probably more around here.. and if they can't see in the dark it should be easy."
>>330075
Wouldn't that cause it to bleed to death? She's never heard of that having much success in stories.

>>330084
Not if you tie up the wounds properly, or cauterise them properly. But that hurts like a bitch and sometimes the shock can kill them. Well, only one way to find out. One foot should be good enough.

>>330084
Drag it along with you. If it dies then animate it, if not then you have another sacrifice.

But hey! Torch!

Psithief 2011/07/24(Sun)08:42 No. 330570 ID: 3bad4c
File 131152214259.png - (115.94KB , 1060x891 , 61.png )

ITEMS ACQUIRED: 40au 1x granite cup 1x jasper 1x weapon crystal

Oops, it bled out.
Now it's a minion.
"Go scout the area for us and return. Stay hidden."
>"Yes, master." The zombie slinks off.

Time passes.

Psithief 2011/07/24(Sun)09:13 No. 330571 ID: 3bad4c
File 131152399471.png - (115.97KB , 1060x891 , 62.png )

Abed wanders around the large cavern.
>"Nothing yet!"

The minion returns.
>"Master, they have captured humanoids."
"Abed, we've investigated now, yes?"
>"What?" She calls out. "No, no. We need to do some rescuing, because that involves killing captors!"

Is Abed's plan silly?
Rescue the prisoners from the derro or just capture a few derro?

>>330571
Capture three, kill the rest.
If you free the prisoners the town will love you for it, and that has value.

>>330571
Depends on your objective. Rescuing the prisoners could get you a better reputation when the prisoners tell others that you rescued them, so if you're at all interested in that and there aren't so many derro that you can't take them, you might as well go for the rescue.

But if there are tons of derro or there's no point in having a good rep because opening the portal will somehow make that irrelevant, then her plan is silly and excessively dangerous.

>>330571
Capture/kill Derros and then possibly save/kill/sacrifice prisoners depending on what you feel like at the time. Either way lots of things will die which is fun and nice.

kill the derro. as for the prisoners... finders keepers, eh?

If you make it look like the derro killed the prisoners, you can use their souls for Versparki's portal.

Psithief 2011/07/25(Mon)06:14 No. 331145 ID: 3bad4c
File 131159969447.png - (366.46KB , 1060x891 , 63.png )

>>330572 Kill most, rescue prisoners
>>330573 Rescue if it's easy
>>330578 Kill for the lulz
>>330584 Kill derro, sacrifice prisoners
>>330767 Complicated

There are many derro, but as a race of sneaky poisoners with naught but piercing weapons they will be destroyed by a single zombie.
To her minion she says, "Incapacitate all the derro you can find. Return here when you are damaged. There is no time pressure, so you may use stealth."
>"Yes, master." It sneaks away.
>Abed is impressed. "One of your zombies can destroy all those derro?"
"It is impervious to their tactics and weapons. One cannot poison or effectively backstab that which is already dead. Wait near that tunnel entrance, you will be responsible for attacking those that flee."
>"I won't let you down!"

Minutes pass. There is the occasional scuffle or loud bang that can be heard as distant echoes. After half an hour the minion returns.
>"I am damaged," it announces.
Putting her hand on its head, Versparki channels the power of undeath into it. When she is done it once again leaves to find more derro.

>"Nothing yet, huh?"
It's been an hour since they last saw the minion.
"My instructions did not say anything about the prisoners."
>"Ah, right. I think we should go see if they're surrounded by dead derro then."
"I think you are right."

The pair cautiously advance through the tunnels. They come to a chamber that stinks of excrement and is caked in dry blood.
Some derro lie on the floor, each badly beaten, most likely dead. Stone cages hold human prisoners, too weak to call out as they see strangers approach.

"You should free them, Abed. They will need the warmth of your personality."
She smiles.
>"Fine, I'll do the dirty job because of your wonderful compliment."
"I will wait for my minion to return. If it has managed to kill the entire population then this may be an ideal base of operations."

Two of the derro in the room have survived, but are unconscious. The rest are dead.
Abed leads the prisoners away from the derro tunnels.
>"Good luck." She says.

Several hours pass. There is no way for Versparki to know whether the minion has been destroyed or simply cannot find more derro. Should she continue to wait?
(If it does return then the area may be considered safe for looting.)

>>331145
Animate the dead Derro and have them help with the search.
Alternatively, animate the dead and have them haul the not-dead ones to the portal.

>>331148
(Animating the dead derro nearby will destroy the derro zombie already out there somewhere. Only 1 *necrocarnum* zombie can be animated at a time.)

I was gonna say summon undead, but it probably lasts for like a minute for your level 3 self. unless I'm wrong about that, go do the searching yourself.

>>331145
There might be something else down here that destroyed it. Be on the watch for anything suspicious .

>>331145
Finding out what happened to the Derro and making this a base of operations can wait, you got the sacrifices you need for the portal thingy, now is the time for it.

By the way, what are you planning to let through?

Psithief 2011/07/26(Tue)01:44 No. 331656 ID: 3bad4c
File 131166989093.png - (389.59KB , 1060x891 , 64.png )

>>331148 Search by replacement zombie
>>331160 Search by self
>>331172 Be careful
>>331200 Abandon zombie, open portal now

Versparki is torn between searching and leaving, and stays for a little while longer.
The decision becomes moot as the minion returns. It starts moving past her.
"Stop and report."
>"I have been searching for derro."
Excellent. Ah, wait..
"Were there more prisoners?"
>"None alive."
"Gather up to three of the living, unconscious derro into this room."
It does so.

When she arrives back at the hole Abed and she fell down she finds that there is a rope dangling from above.
Abed appears to have succeeded. She has given me the cover I need.
Her minion climbs up first, then hauls her up. It then descends, ties up a derro, ascends, then hauls that derro up.
The process repeats until there are three unconscious derro lying next to the hole in the warm evening air.
Versparki leaves the rope coiled up on the surface as a message to Abed, should she return.

As it turns out, dragging three unconscious bodies through a thick forest is long, arduous work. Both she and her minion are incapable of tiring, but the progress is slow. So slow, in fact, that Abed manages to catch up.
>"Versparki!"
"Abed. Well done."
Abed grins at her.
>"I got away as soon as I could. Let me help you with that."
"Thankyou. You left what must be a celebration in your honour to help me?"
>"Haha! Silly. They're holding that tomorrow night."
Her smile says she'd do it anyway.

Psithief 2011/07/26(Tue)02:25 No. 331673 ID: 3bad4c
File 131167231229.png - (144.96KB , 1060x891 , 65.png )

[Switch - Abed]
They worked through the night without rest.
Souls were sacrificed, and the portal stood ready to open.
Versparki turned to her with a pensive look on her face.
>"Abed, are you sure you want to go through with this? You're sure you don't want to destroy me? This is a terrible thing we're doing."
She really trusts me.
Abed puts her hand on Versparki's shoulder.
"I know why you do it. I know why you hurt others, it's because you hurt too, isn't it? Inside. You want to distract yourself from it."
Abed's nearly crying.
"We're the same, Versparki. I'm so full of rage and anger and hate. I know what it's like, and I can't stop now. I can't face what I've done. I can only keep doing what I'm doing."
She can't help but embrace Versparki.
"Okay? You're not alone anymore. You have me. I'm going to be your friend as the world burns. You don't have to be alone."

A moment of silence, as Abed continues to hug Versparki tightly.
Her voice is soft, gentle, something Abed's never heard from her before.
>"You're right. I did hurt. I hurt so much. I ran away, I embraced death. Then I couldn't feel anything anymore. I hadn't felt anything for such a long time."
She pulls back. Versparki is smiling!
>"Then you came along and you treated me better than I ever deserved to be treated. You bitch, you've made me feel again."
Abed laughs through tears. She puts her hand on Versparki's back and turns to face the portal.
"Come on Versparki, let's burn this world down together."

did you know that you can easily fish for carp without bait, because they will jump at the fishing hook with their mouths wide open just because it is shiny?

you're kinda like that, Abed.

>>331673
Might want to make sure that neither of you will immediately die after the portal opens. Or that nothing that comes through the portal will immediately kill you.

I mean, there's no point in burning down the world if you can't stand and stare into the flames.

>>331673
Wooo! Burning down the world!

Wait, what's going to come through that portal that will burn down the world?

I think there being metaphorical, that said you should probably take precautions about opening the portal, just in case it tries to murder you two.

>>331673
Well, you're going to need to save a LOT of cancer orphans to offset this kind of evil. You don't want people to know you've done horrible things with a mere glance, after all.
Besides, you don't want to be evil now, you just want to be chaotic neutral.

Psithief 2011/07/26(Tue)10:47 No. 331744 ID: 3bad4c
File 131170246494.png - (100.04KB , 1060x891 , 66.png )

>>331674
+5 POINTS FOR AWESOME SIMILE
Oh man, that is so true. I'll latch onto anything, until I get bored. What about Versparki then? Unless, maybe, it's because I want to wear the pants? I definitely have the chance of doing that in our relationship. Do you wear pants in a friendship? I don't know. I want her to be like the sister I never had. It's going to be me, my sister Verpsarki, my boyfriend Valinoghtorklax and our fire-breathing baby. A happy, destructive family. MUCH better than my real one. Also not burnt to ash. Ha!
Abed giggles quietly to herself as she and Versparki walk into the portal.
We're going to have an evil empire right underneath La'themi and it's going to be awesome because the elves will love us and never suspect. Ooh, it's getting dark in here.
"Is it going to be safe for me?"
>"Yes­­ Abed, as long as we don't go far."

We're definitely through the portal, but it doesn't look that different? Hmm.
"So, where are we?"
>"We are on the Lower Path, near a rip that leads to the Void."
"That sounds-" The sound of beating wings interrupts her.

Psithief 2011/07/26(Tue)10:47 No. 331745 ID: 3bad4c
File 131170247533.png - (93.16KB , 1060x891 , 67.png )

There's a presence in front of them.
>"The Lord of Dust sends his greetings," it growls.
>"His greetings are well received."
>"We are pleased you have opened this portal. Name your reward."
>"Serving is its own reward."
>"Ha! Very amusing. The Lord of Dust has a mission for you."
A mission?
>"I am ready."
>"No, you are NOT ready. You are far from ready. This is a difficult mission."
>"I understand."
>"The Lord of Dust wishes to become the greater deity of death. You are to go to the Tomb of Death and retrieve the head of Shade."
>"The head?"
>"Yes. The Tomb has stood for more than a century, but has never before been conquered. You must be the first."
>"I will prepare, then."
>"See that you do. Do not rush, your only competitors are those that wish for treasures."
Oh no. I think it's looking at me.
>"Who is this? Your minion?"
>"No, this is my ally and friend."
>"Ah! A live one, you are wise to have a living ally. However, she is lacking. The Lord of Dust will remedy this."
Wait, what?
The beast reaches towards Abed with a shadowy claw, and in half a second Abed is writhing on the floor in pain.
The heat is intense, it feels like she's on fire! The world was black, but now it's red. She can feel her consciousness fading in and out.

[Switch - Versparki]
>"Your ally is now tainted with our blessing. Now for your reward. I have chosen for you, a selection of gifts that should serve you well."
It reaches towards her. She can feel her body shifting. While dead to pain, she finds the sensation of her bones, muscles and skin warping, stretching, breaking fascinating.
She can feel the inviting coldness of death stronger than she could before. The process ends, and she finds herself delightfully monstrous in appearance. The illusion quickly reestablishes itself, however.
>"I will guard the portal on your side. Do not return until you have accomplished your task, for there is no benefit in you drawing attention to this passage.
Versparki nods, and drags Abed back through the portal. Abed's face is bleeding from every orifice and duct.

>>331679
It's us.

Going into the portal to burn down the world only to come out as the ones who are going to do it. Awesome.

>>331745
Awesome. But is there any time limit on your task? Because this sounds like something you would have to prepare for quite thouroughly and that takes time.

Probably a good idea to make sure you cleaned out that Derro nest as well, having a sort of safe base of operations is useful.

find a mirror you guys.

Get Abed out of the Hell Portal guys. It's not healthy.

But Abed is with child! What happens when a half dragon is born of a demonic monstrosity? I feel like this is some kind of hellish soap opera.

Psithief 2011/07/27(Wed)03:37 No. 332285 ID: 3bad4c
File 131176307047.png - (169.72KB , 1060x891 , 68.png )

MANY DERRO DEFEATED. +3000XP. +50 POINTS. NEW MAIN QUEST RECEIVED. +150 POINTS. ITEMS ACQUIRED: 1x DEADWALKER'S RING 1x ROD OF UNDEAD MASTERY 1x SCEPTRE OF THE NETHERWORLD GRAFTS ACQUIRED. TEMPLATES ACQUIRED.

[Switch - Abed]

Abed comes to as the pain fades. She's back on the home side of the portal. The beast has come through, it's twice her size. Its skin is pale white, but it has demonic features and wings. Instead of pants it has a shroud of darkness. It seems to be hovering in place.
"I feel weird."
Versparki's voice comes from above, and Abed realises her head is lying in Versparki's lap. Versparki sounds different, like she's not used to speaking.
>"Shh, rest Abed."
Abed closes her eyes. Her blood still feels hot, but it's not painful anymore.
>"What is she?" Versparki asks the beast.
>"She is part vampire now. It seemed appropriate, she was already driven by lust. Now she will have another, life."
Abed stirs. "...don't want to.."
It continues.
>"As soon as she tastes blood she will need it for the rest of her life, but it is a small price."
>"What if she does not taste blood?"
>"She would need extraordinary willpower."
thbpt, I have that.
Weakly she says, "..what about my baby?"
>"The taint is not compatible with your child, thus is will be unaffected. Human children will be, however."
Aww? So tired. Versparki, why are you so bony now?
Through bleary eyes Abed realises the portal looks different.
>"Versparki, one final object." He gives her friend a dark globe the size of her fist.
"What's that?"
>"The Lord of Dust has perceived that you will likely need one that hides in shadows. This is a blessing of darkness for that creature. Will the blessing to take effect when you are ready."
>"Abed will rest here with me."
>"Fine, but do not return once you leave."
Abed drifts off to sleep. Snoozing, she hears a final instruction from Versparki to her minion.
>"Return to the derro caverns, gather all treasure into one room and guard it until I return."
>"Yes, master."

>>332285
Sleep well and dream of non vampirey things. Or of sucking the sweet nectar of life from an elven maiden. Whatever you feel like really.

When you wake up we have to find out what this part vampire stuff means. Has to give you some benefits and probably a few drawbacks.

ass. he should have asked before turning us into a vampire. we should see if we can give him the finger before we pass out.

downvoting pissing off the horrorterror, upvoting drinking something's blood.

>>332316
Downvoting both.
There's no reason at all to drink blood. It doesn't gain us anything. Besides a DO IT OR DIE addiction.

Tomorrow return to town and refuse all the rewards they offer. Insist that unjust imprisonment is so horribly vile that you'd feel unpleasantly dirty accepting a reward for stopping it. You have experience with that, so it seems like a great aspect to add to your personality.
Also, you're a murderhobo that can barely carry their loot. Asking for more is pointless.

Filename is accidental. Psithief 2011/07/27(Wed)12:05 No. 332360 ID: 3bad4c
File 131179355077.png - (400.16KB , 1060x891 , 69.png )

Abed wakes up, her strange dreams already fading from memory.
She sits up and refreshes her mind, allowing the psionic power to flush and settle within her.
>"How are you?" Versparki's voice seems to click as she talks.
"I'm better, thanks. I uh..I need to go back to town. Wow..I need to rush or I'll miss the celebration."
>"Alright. I was going to go to the caverns."
"No, no. That can wait. We'll go to town, we need to put on a good show for the elves, er, people."
>"I see. Very well."
They start heading towards town at a brisk pace.
"I feel stronger, do you feel stronger?"
>"I am much stronger."
"I'm a little bit stronger, then. Look, uh, you won't tell people I'm pregnant will you?"
>"No."
"Thanks."

Hours of jogging later the pair are almost to the town.
"This is amazing, I've never felt so healthy."
>"I'm happy for you."
"Ha. Well we'll have to talk about what you got out of it later. I need to go be a guest of honour, make sure you show up too."
>"I will."
They split up to take care of their respective business.

Knock knock knock.
Abed's waiting outside Maldrimir's house. She's a little anxious.
Sorry if I kill you, Maldrimir, but I need to know right now.
The door opens.
>"Li- Abed!"
"HicanIcomeinthanks." Abed pushes into the front room.
>"Sure?" He closes the door.
"Is Thaae here?"
>"No, she's no-"
"Were you in the middle of something?"
>"Not really, I-"
Abed shuts him up with a kiss. They enjoy it for a moment, but then he pulls back.
>"Listen, Abed. Thaae and I sort of have this thing going and I'm not sure-"
"Mal, I'm not trying to come between you two. Guy mind, girl body, remember? I promise, no emotional blackmail or dirty tricks or scheming. I just wanna fuck."
>"Um, well..if-"
"Look, we'll just be two guys having hetero sex, okay? If it makes you feel any better I'll fuck Thaae the next time I see her."
>"Yeah, that does make me feel better."
"Good." She wraps her arms under his and effortlessly lifts him up and takes him to the bedroom.

Naked. Kissing. Touching. She's kind of jealous how good elves are at foreplay, but something else has her concerned.
She can feel him, his blood, pumping around his body like a river. It's calling to her, and she wants it. She came here to find out if she could resist its call,
but she's losing her will to do so. Nonetheless, she doesn't stop Maldrimir. She needs to know.
"Mal," she says, breathlessly, "stop." She pushes him away and half-way gets off the bed. "Lie back."
He does, and she mounts him. "If I'm going to come in here demanding sex, it's only polite I do the work."
>"You're such a boy," he chuckles.
"Shut up and enjoy yourself." She begins rocking her hips back and forth. Oh damn, being on top is awesome. Why have I never done this before? Oh, right. Boy.
He's gently handling her breasts as they jiggle up and down in front of him, and she's loving it.
Damn. She's lost control of her breathing already. Too fast!
She changes position, leaning forward until they're fucking face to face.
He's so warm.
Her teeth feel strange. Her upper canines ache, ache like they're trying to climax as much as the rest of her is.
She moves slightly to her right, so she's brushing against his neck every time they thrust together.
She can feel her lips part wide of their own accord and she's turned her neck so that her upper lip is brushing up and down his inviting blood vessels.
No..yes..mm
"Mmm-aaah!" She lets out a little cry. She was going to be all stoic, but she doesn't care anymore.
She's almost there, and her dagger-like teeth are begging to bite.
They're resting on his neck. Just a little bit of pressure and they'll go through. No no no no no ahh.
She bites down hard, into her lower lip. The ache in her teeth fades as she comes.
WILL SAVE - SUBSTITUTING CONCENTRATION CHECK FOR WILL BONUS USING MOMENT OF PERFECT MIND EXPENDING PSIONIC FOCUS TO GET 15 ON CONCENTRATION CHECK 15+11 = 26 VS DC 20.
Oh fuck yesss.
Abed's so pleased she resisted. Sure, it blew her psionic focus, but that's easily replaced.
She gives Mal a big dry kiss on the cheek. She's all slippery now, but they keep going until Mal gets there.

Now they're resting. Abed is cuddling Maldrimir. She feels like she owes him.
>"You're sure you're not trying to steal me away?" he wonders aloud, as he plays with her hair.
"I'm positive." She gives him a slight squeeze. "I really enjoyed that, but I have a celebration I need to make an appearance at."
>"Okay, go then."
She gets dressed, grabs her stuff and walks out. Time to be famous.

Next up, party time. This took so long to write, sorry!

don't forget to hide your fangs. that would be really awkward.

>>332360
Find Thaae at the celebration and seduce her.

>>332360
Good job on resisting the blood sucking, would be a huge hassle to hide the body if you had gone through with it. We're not rulers of this place yet and not yet powerful enough to take over by force. So blood drinking needs to be keept at a minimum inside of town limits, enemies are free food though.

You should probably also ask Versparki if she has a method for keeping the blood somewhat fresh so you can store it for more food.

>>332389
Blood drinking needs to be avoided entirely. We heard what was said- as soon as we taste blood we will need it forever. And needing it forever is all kinds of inconvenient; it means that we can never go far from other people who we can feed on. So no drinking blood ever, even from enemies.

>>332360
>Now they're resting. Abed is cuddling Maldrimir. She feels like she owes him.
You don't owe him shit. He got awesome sex out of it, that's more than enough.

Clean yourself up, make sure your fangs aren't visible, and get to that party.

Psithief 2011/07/28(Thu)09:18 No. 333002 ID: 3bad4c
File 131186991824.png - (245.36KB , 1060x891 , 70.png )

And now to continue with the various sprinklings of plot as we continue to examine every facet of the life of an adventurer.
Use @Abed or @Versparki to send suggestions to that PC even if they are not currently the focus.

>>328014 Do mercenary work. Gain power. Establish base.
>>328016 " "
Steps one and two complete. Time for step three, endear myself to the locals and settle in.
Abed runs her tongue across her front teeth. It appears her fangs have retracted.
I'm part-vampire! It doesn't suck! This is awesome!
Half a second later she hangs her head in shame after realising she just punned herself.

Note to self, go shopping for clothes. Also don't crush clothes under treasure in magic bag.
Magic bag..clothes. Magic clothes?
Yep, I'm going to go buy some magic clothes.
So she does.
ITEMS ACQUIRED: 1x SHIFTWEAVE Want details? Use the discussion thread to ask. ITEMS LOST: 500gp

A little magic, a little psionics, voila! The sexiest homeless murderer in town.
Now she hurries over from the clothing store to the hall of gatherings.
As she walks into the entrance there's a call from a man behind a counter.
>"Check your, uh, things, miss?"
"Oh, yes please." Abed checks in everything, leaving her with just her clothes, her panties and her magic ring.
>"Very good. Please go in."
She nods, and walks in as graceful as she can manage.

She barely has a moment to take in how crowded the hall is before a wave of applause starts up.
It's quite the shock. She remembers to smile.
An elf dressed in slightly more magnificent finery than the others strides up to her.
>"Welcome, welcome! Thank you for coming. I'm Myyn, mistress of ceremonies. Come, talk, mingle and enjoy. There will be a gift presentation later in the evening, have fun until then."
"Thankyou, Myyn." Don't think about dead elves, don't think about dead elves. "Uh, may I ask how the ones I rescued are doing?"
>"Yes, of course. They're not well enough to come tonight, it may take them a while to recover from the trauma. They're alive though. If you want, you can talk to Amayth. He's been taking care of them."
"I might do that."

Abed spots Versparki sitting down at a table in a far corner, so she makes it a priority to talk to her first. She moves through the crowd with ease, then sits down opposite her friend.
"Hey."
>"I need to cast a spell on you."
"Ok.."
Versparki mumbles under her breath, and her gestures are hidden under the table. Abed feels a slight tingle as the spell takes effect.
"Why'd you-"
>"Powerful agent of Good in the room, Abed. He'd probably be able to detect you without my help."
"Oh. Should I look around all obviously like an idiot?" She smirks.
>"He may want to talk to you. His name is Amayth."
"Ah. So you know the locals well, then?"
>"I-"
Versparki is interrupted by a voice behind Abed.
>"Abed!" It's Thaae, she's smiling. "You look amazing!"
"Hey, thanks Thaae. So do you."
Thaae looks over to the other side of the table, her smile drops.
>"Versparki? Aunt Versparki? It's been..years. You're looking," she pauses, "well."
>"Little Thaae, I trust you're doing well?"
Thaae looks uncomfortable.
>"Yes, I am. Oh, how nice. The two of you have matching rings. I'll come back to talk to you when you're free, Abed."
"Bye?" Thaae is already walking away.
"What was that about?"
>"I don't know. Thaae has a reputation as the town gossip. Perhaps she has to tell someone."
"So..you died but you never left home?"
>"Thaae is blameless to my pain, Abed. I did not get her involved."
"Okay. That was weird though. Do you mind if I go talk to her?"
>"Go ahead, you're safer now."
"Thanks."
What is up with Thaae?

>>333002
No weapons hidden about your person? Not even a stilleto in your cleavage or something like that? This is a great disappointment.

Anyway, it's probably a bit unnerving to see your dead aunt being friendly with someone you had sex with. And she's probably worried that you're falling in with a bad crowd or something like that. Or it could be that she doesn't know about her aunt being dead and she thinks you're getting it on with her as well. But you won't know for sure unless you ask her.

>>333005
Go explain to her that these are communication rings, and you needed them for the rescue mission. State outright that you and Versp are not interested in each other like that.

>>333002
@Versparki

So why are you sitting alone in the corner here? Surely there are some people here who you would be interested in speaking with, since you're from this place. Might as well, right?

Who are the major town figures? What do they do? Do any of them pose a significant danger to your plans?

How exactly did you end up in this situation, anyway? It seems like there's quite a bit of potentially relevant backstory going on.

@Abed: Run up to Thaae and explain that those are NOT engagement rings. She seems somewhat upset.

@Versparki: Monologue internally about your pain for a while. Then theorize a way for the Undead to become inebriated.

Psithief 2011/07/29(Fri)05:29 No. 333544 ID: 3bad4c
File 131194259556.png - (171.81KB , 1060x891 , 71.png )

Where's she gone?
Abed moves around the hall, doing her best to politely dodge introductions from various elves with promises of "I'll get back to you."
She can't see Thaae, and since she's the tallest person in the room it should be easy.
Oh come on. What?
Surely she's attracting attention with all her running about, but hopefully the elves will assume it's typical human enthusiasm.
It looks like there are some other hallways that don't immediately exit the structure, so she starts investigating them.

[Switch - Versparki]
Versparki just watched Abed search the hall, then leave through another door.
She only came here to give her friend some backup, hopefully this won't backfire.
Earlier she managed to get a look at herself in the mirror without her illusory disguise. Seeing her body in such a state would have horrified her if she was still alive.
Her left arm has rotted away down to the bone, her tongue has grown into a horrific spine-like appendage with claws at the end. One eye has grown to twice its size and is a pale milky white, the other has been replaced by a dark red gem. She looks like she's wearing an armour of bones, but in fact it's fused into her skin. She's a horrible mess of a monster, and she delights in it.

She wonders how she feels about the elves here. For the first hundred years or so after she died all she did was sit in dark contemplation in a dusty necromancer's library, coming to grips with eternity. Then she came upon information about the portal. She decided to open it so she could be with the more powerful representitives of her kind and learn dark secrets from them.

When she returned, it was a simple matter to keep the den staff from asking questions with a steady supply of coins. Over fifty years she only made a few dozen naive adventurers disappear, so little suspicion ever arose. Now she had less need to hide her activities. She had a friend now, someone to be the friendly face to the outside world. It was an interesting development, but unfortunately it dregged up long forgotten emotions and memories of the pain and suffering that drove her to kill herself in the first place.

Now was a rare chance to really exist in the moment. She might be discovered and have the entire town turn against her, but they would not chase her far. The only real threat was the priest Amayth. Only Amayth would have the spells to detect her lack of life, an effect she did not have a counter for. He was also the one best equipped to combat her in this state, and the only one that would be interested in following her should she abandon the town entirely. So yes, staying was a risk, touching was a risk. Perhaps even speaking was a risk. Thaae reacted oddly, so she might have to disappear too.

Versparki decides to listen through Abed's ring of communication to find out what Thaae knows.

[Switch - Abed]
Found her.

>>333544
@Versparki: Well maybe you could trick Amayth to go out of the town and to some more secluded place where he would have a very unfortunate accident that would leave him with a very bad case of permanent death. But it needs to be done in a fashion that doesn't bring suspiscion to your or Abed.

@Abed: Ah good, time to explain that you're not getting it on with her aunt, the two of you are just wandering murderhobo best friends and got the rings so you can talk to each other more easily while going around and being murderhobos.

Hmm, the whole deal with elderly relatives stealing lovers from younger people might actually be a common thing in elven society.

>>333544
Do this:
>>333009

>>333548
@Abed: Substitute 'murderhobo' with 'adventurer' in that explanation. Ehehe.

@Versparki: You would need something that would put you beyond suspicion. Perhaps find a way to lure him out to deal with some undead threat. It's not unknown for priests to get over their head on encounters like that.

Alternatively, study to find a counter to the 'detect life' thing. How likely would it be for him to cast it around her?

Psithief 2011/07/29(Fri)08:44 No. 333574 ID: 3bad4c
File 131195424187.png - (274.60KB , 1060x891 , 72.png )

Thaae is standing on a poorly lit walkway overlooking the main hall.
She's crying.
Oh Thaae.
Abed approaches, and Thaae looks up from the protective wall she was leaning on.
>"No..don't come any closer."
"Please, Thaae."
>"No. I don't want to get hurt."
Softly, Abed says, "I think I've already hurt you."
>"Maybe. I don't know. Abed.." she trails off.
Abed makes her move, quickly closing the distance between them and grabbing Thaae to her chest in a warm hug.
Thaae sniffles into Abed's bosom.
"Thaae, tell me what this is about."
Thaae sobs for a few seconds longer, then she gathers her thoughts for a second.
>"You're special, and wonderful. I wanted to help you. They said you were evil, but you opened up to me. I asked and you told me your deepest pain openly and honestly."
>"I thought you just needed someone, someone to really care for you. Someone to help you get better. I wanted it to be me."
>"I can tell when people lie, Abed. It means I get a bit lonely, 'cause I take it on myself to make things work around here. I know you're not good at telling how old we are, Abed. I'm middle-aged. I thought I was going to be alone, in spirit, for a long time."
>"Then you came along. You're smart, you're intelligent, you're a psion, you're beautiful and you're honest. You haven't told me a direct lie. Do you know how rare that is?"
>"But..but then I saw you today and you're talking amicably with an undead monster. I lost hope."
"How..how do you know she's undead?"
>"I can sense these things, like I can sense that you're so much smarter than all the dimwits down below us. Oh gods, did she charm you? You can tell me. Please tell me."
"I don't think she can do that, Thaae. She's not a vampire." ..but I am.. can I charm?
Thaae sobs again. >>333005 Vampires are the only undead that like sex, right? Anyway, how does she sense..?
Realisation slowly dawns on Abed. She saw Versparki's mind..and it's not normal.
"You're a telepath.. you're an unusally inteligent wood elf, and you don't fit in."
Thaae nods. She'd be very hard to charm then.
>"I really could have loved you Abed, but I don't think I can save you."
"Thaae, please don't give up on me yet."
>"..Why not?" She sniffs again.
"I want you to help me."
>"Versparki can't be a good influence on you. Why would you willingly hang around an undead if in your soul you're not a monster?"
"I.. she was going to kill me, but I spared her. I offered to be her friend. We saved the prisoners from the derro together. She says she hasn't felt emotions for ages until I was kind to her."
>"Oh..oh gods. I can tell you're being truthful. I..don't know what to say."
"Thaae, I don't think Versparki can be helped like you want to help me. I just.. I just want her to be evil to monsters that nobody cares about, like derro or drow or other cretins."
>"Abed.."
"I don't think she needs to hurt anyone here anymore. I want to be there to make sure she doesn't hurt the people I care about."
>"Even herself?"
"Even herself. Especially herself. She's my friend too."
>"So..those rings?"
"Communication devices."
>"I want to kiss you."
They kiss. It's a very gentle, emotional kiss. Abed has a few tears fall as they part.
"Thaae, you should know I sexed Mal before I came here."
>"Oh.."
"He would only do it if I promised to give you the same treatment the next time I saw you."
>"I'd like that."
There's a pause between them as they look at each other, thinking dirty thoughts.
"How long before this gift presentation?"
>"Um..probably be about an hour."
"Ok.."

Abed soon found out that Thaae tastes even better on the inside than she does on the outside.
I really don't understand why there aren't more half-elves.
At the same time, Thaae was finding out that Abed could shapechange her tongue into the perfect tool for pleasuring her.
>don't scream don't scream don't scream don't scream!
Versparki took her ring off. This was the second time today that she'd accidently listened in on Abed having sex. It was not amusing.

>>333574
I would bet it's not.

@Abed: You know evil doesn't have to mean a muderous monster who goes on killing rampages at the drop of a hat. There are other ways than that. But hey, it's good to see you got someone who cares a bit for you. Who knows, maybe they're open to some bigami down the road, although you don't strike me as the kind of person to be faithful, even to multiple partners.

Anyway, probably time to go to that award thingy and maybe hold a short speech about how we can create a better world if we all do our part or something.

>>333574
@Abed:
After you're done, you should give her a partial confession
"In the past few months I've done... things that I'm not proud of, and I think you deserve to know. I'm not ready to talk about all of them, but... all things in time, right? I'm not looking for or expecting forgiveness, just that you try to understand and let me finish my story before you release your anger.
For some background, I've always been not quite right in the head. Not dangerously so, I just have trouble feeling guilt or shame, and I don't think the same way most people do. This makes it hard to pick up on things like subtlety or read peoples emotions, which has made it very hard to fit in. I adapt to changes quickly, and what you sense from me comes from trying to enjoy whatever I do.
I had an old friend. A doctor. I had had his sister as a lover, and I discovered that after we broke off our romance she bore my child. I was told she was selling services door to door, but I didn't understand that meant she turned to prostitution. Understand, had I known I would have helped her.
My doctor friend diagnosed me with testicular cancer, and convinced me that I needed castration to survive. When I found out he was simply out for revenge I slew him in my anger, and discovered that the patient notes he kept for me were nothing but hateful words and scribbles. It... was not the best decision, and although I feel no guilt I do regret my poor self control.
Unfortunately, that's when the dragon attacked - yes, the same one. By the time I got close to the dragon half the city was gone, and the only thing I could think of to survive was to seduce the dragon. It worked, but he took me back to his lair. He would have simply eaten me afterwards, but when his hunger returned and I tried to shift to something unappetizing I found his seed had already taken root. He decided to keep me as his... No, I'm not ready to talk about that, and you don't want to hear it.
I made plans to escape, but they all relied on the dragon not coming after me. Since I was no match for him in a fight, I needed him to trust me.
Eventually he sent me into a town to scout out where the valuables would be so they wouldn't burn with the rest of the town. There were three adventurers in town, but after getting a good look at them I realized that they stood no chance of even warding the dragon off. There was no way to save anybody; if I warned anybody he would just hunt them down and prolong their suffering, and my fate wouldn't be so merciful as theirs.
I did what I was told, and to 'prove my loyalty' I seduced the adventurers and gave them each a wonderful night followed by a quick death. They died happy, instead of horrified.
The town burned, and I helped with the slaughter - don't think harshly of it; a slash across the neck is a quick death, and if you heard the wailing of the people burning alive or the screams of the ones who were eaten in pieces I doubt you would do differently.
The next day I convinced the dragon to let me go out into the world under the pretense of wanting to grow in power so I could better serve him, and securing a better lair for him. He gave me items from his horde to help insure his child's survival and let me go.
That brings us up to when we met.
You... should also know that Versparki stayed behind ostensibly to clear out the derro while I was bringing the prisoners back to town. She brought them to some cave and sacrificed them to open a portal... somewhere. I followed her in and she spoke to some sort of outsider. What happened then is confusing to me, but the thing gave Versparki more power and inflicted a curse on me. Thankfully I'm still alive and my psionic powers insure that I'll never succumb to the thirst for blood, but... I'm scared, Thaae. Mal doesn't know this, and I'd rather ne not find out for awhile, but... When I made love to him the thirst took hold, and I didn't know how bad it would get. I couldn't push him away, but I managed to resist biting him. I know next time will be easier since I know what to expect and how to fight it, but it was a terrifying thing to hold Mal in my arms and not know if he was safe with me.
Even when I've had no control over anything else in my life I've still had control of myself, and to come so close to losing that...

So here I am. A wrong gendered half-vampire pregnant with a red dragon's child.

Thaae, you're right. I'm so lost it's a struggle to even tell the difference between right and wrong. Please, will you be my map and compass?

...

Oh, and I think Versparki knows you suspect her. I won't let her hurt you, but we need to convince her you won't try to hurt her. She told me she turned to undeath because she was angry at life and the world for suffering so much emotionally, and wanted that to stop. I know she's dangerous, but I want to help her. If she can get her life... er, unlife back together, then maybe there's hope for me."

>>333602
Correction: "A wrong gendered dragon-pregnant half-vampire murderhobo."

>>333602
I really do not think that sharing all that information is necessary or constructive. Particularly the "I abandoned my child", "I sleep with and then murder people", "I helped a dragon slaughter an entire town", and "Versparki and I sacrificed a bunch of creatures to an evil god in exchange for power in the form of physical alterations" parts.

I mean, seriously. She doesn't actually like that we're evil, and honesty does not mean full disclosure. If we tell her all that, she'll be completely horrified and probably panic, might well alert someone of what we're up to with the portal, and Versparki would want to kill her to cover it up.

Leave things as they stand, enjoy great sex with someone who thinks they can turn us into a better person, and don't reveal anything that might make them think we're too far gone.

>>333608
I agree with this. She doens't have to know our life story, in fact if we tell her then we will probably have to kill her.

>>333602

how about no.

Psithief 2011/07/30(Sat)10:46 No. 334183 ID: 3bad4c
File 131204801821.png - (276.99KB , 1060x891 , 73.png )

>>333586
Mmhm. Faithful? That doesn't seem to matter much anymore. That was a human thing. All the humans she knows are dead. Abed kind of wishes she was an elf.

>>333602 Ow. Abed has a headache now.
What? No..no, Abed's not going to lie to Thaae. Thaae is totally good at picking out direct lies. Lots of that isn't even true. Abed doesn't feel guilt, but she never stops feeling shame.
>>333608
>>334158
Yeah. Yeah! Abed likes Thaae. Or she likes things about Thaae. Some things, mostly the things they have in common. She would love to be loved by Thaae, but Abed isn't sure she's capable of real love herself. She's so focussed on herself that other people cease to matter. Being loved is something that would appeal to her narcissism.

Of course, if Thaae really can heal her mind, that would be cool too. Abed's nearly smart enough to connect all the dots in her completely misalgined mind, maybe Thaae could help her finish. It is constant torture to know what's wrong but not being able to face it.

That's all going to have to wait. Abed's got a gift to receive in a few minutes. She hopes it's something good, because she's barely had a chance to get any wine in her.
>>332347 (Turn down the gift)
Of course, that might be funny too. Depends what it is.

Ah..here we go. Time to go be all sexy and awesome and get praised by everyone in the room! Woo!
Myyn calls for the room's attention.
>"Thank you all for coming. Tonight we celebrate the return of our lost friends, and remember those who could not. To their rescuer we are thankful. Abed?"
Abed stands next to Myyn.
>"In our gratitude we are presenting you with the item contained within this box. Please open it so we can savour your surprise!"
Elves are funny. Okay then..
Abed opens the box. Inside is..

ITEMS ACQUIRED: 1x DEED TO ELVEN HOUSE 1x KEY TO ELVEN HOUSE
Wow, this is exactly what I need! Sweet. I guess they can afford to do this what with all the elves dying horribly around these parts.
Uh..better say something.
"I'm extremely pleased!"
>"Welcome to our community Abed. We need strong and courageous people like you around!"
She then adds with a whisper:
>"Not to mention the taxes!"
No, no, elves are SNEAKY. Still, this is perfect.
Abed thanks everyone, and then mingles for the rest of the evening. She absolutely adores the attention she gets about her appearance.
The evening winds down, so she bids Versparki goodbye and retrieves her cool stuff from the cloak guy behind the counter.
Thaae's waiting for her.
>"Abed." She's smiling.
"Thaae." They hug. "Come on, I have a home here now! I need you to show me where it is."
>"I can do that."
"And stay the night?"
>"Mmmhmm."
Today has been a very, very good day. Tomorrow? Tomorrow I guess we have to deal with her jealous boy-toy, Maldrimir.

MEANWHILE
In a dark place...
Lasers!
My name is Boose.

crank the bass to eleven and upts umpts umpts with the lazers

>>334183
So Bosse, what's up with the lasers and stuff?

Like, booze? Booze and lasers is all you really need. Time to party.

Hey Caboose. Laser the FUCK outta that darkness. Also, SHOW US YOUR FACE.

 

>>334184
The dark place thunders with the sound of lasers and techno trance.
>>334360
Caboose..laser..face? Like this?
My name is Boose and you will fear my laser face!
>>334283
Booze? No, Boose. Like all the great Booses.
Boose Kamphell - This is my boomstick
Boose Leigh - The greatest fighter didn't die, he just jumped to the moon.
and the awesome nine-aligned Bhatman, Boose Wain.

Of course, he has to be careful. If he spelt his name properly they'd be able to find him. Strangely a name like Br--er--oose will attract more attention than stories of a shadowy figure that kills with beams of light.

Right now he's underground, killing snakes. Construct snakes, fire snakes, evil snakes. You know, just snakes in general. Each snake head is worth a little bit of money, so a lot of snake heads is worth a lot of money!

So Boose, what's with the snakes?

>>334429
Bruce, who's that dude talking to you?

I know this pregnant guy who killed a snake once. you should totally meet her.

where are you and how many snake heads do you have?

>>334429
So what have these snakes done to be classified as evil? You know, I think that if you used your vast wealth to get at the underlying reasons for the snakes being evil and stuff, you could help much more than just firing your lasers in the dark.

Psithief 2011/07/31(Sun)04:27 No. 334547 ID: 3bad4c
File 131211164472.png - (471.00KB , 1024x768 , box.png )

>>334434
What? Where?
KSSSSHHHHHHH. Laser light burns as Boose fires wildly.
Nope. Nothing. I gotta stop having conversations with myself in my head.
>>334435
Hey, Boose isn't allowed to react to spoilers!
Boose.. is underground somewhere.
There was a reward for snake heads in this elven town he was passing through. So he headed underground and found some snakes!
He's been underground for maybe six days now.
Now there are about seventy snake heads of various types hanging from his belt. There would be more, but a lot of the time he's doing so much damage to these snakes they don't even have heads anymore.
Still, it's fun. Shooting things is fun, especially when it's dark and they can only see the laser light.
Sure, maybe they aren't technically lasers because they don't just emit photons, but it's how people imagine lasers would work so meh.

Pew, pew pew.

Boose is a psychic rogue and a non-casting ranger. He wields two 'laser' pistols, and can make up to five separate attacks in six seconds. He is an exceptionally gifted sneaky guy, and has elven crafted magic items that assist in his sneakyness.
Finally, he has a ring so that he cannot be seen with darkvision - only light can reveal his presence.
He also has a crystal embedded in the palm of his left hand. It takes up the majority of the palm and is transparent all the way through the other side. Somehow his bones and tendons are phased out where the crystal is present, allowing him the full use of his fingers.
The crystal does some cool stuff, especially the interfacing with technology bit. It can also play music.
He is somewhat familiar with early 21st century pop culture, but only through historical records, simulations and recreations.

>>334547
Wait, you got 70 parts from dead snakes on you and the oldest ones are 6 days old? God damn, that has to be some pretty nasty smell. It's probably starting to become time to get back to the surface, cash in your bounty and then spend some of the money on a very nice bath and maybe some company.

Psithief 2011/07/31(Sun)05:00 No. 334554 ID: 3bad4c
File 131211361143.png - (371.78KB , 560x545 , damn elves.png )

>>334550
What? And spend that time with elves?
That's why he's been down here for six days straight.
He hates elves. They're gen-engineered freaks.

Besides, the smell you can get used to, and it attracts more snakes.
Kind of stupid really. If I could smell rotting human meat I'd stay well away from it.

Also, now that he thinks about it, he's kind of lost. Oops.
Boose is lost underground! What should he do?

>>334554
Well maybe there are some new non elves in town or something, worth checking out at least.

But for that you sort of need a way out of here, and since none seems to be presenting itself immediatly I suggest lasering your way out. Or possibly removing the rotting snake heads and trying to get a sniff of where fresh air might be coming from and heading in that direction.

climb up.

Carve a hole in the ceiling with lasers. Climb through it. Repeat.

Psithief 2011/08/01(Mon)03:08 No. 334958 ID: 3bad4c
File 131219331944.png - (218.26KB , 1060x891 , 74.png )

>>334555
>>334584
That's a terrible idea. Why do I come up with terrible ideas? I'm going to follow my trail of destruction back out.
SURVIVAL CHECK - FAILURE
Some hours later...

I suck at this. Well, fine.
Boose starts lasering upwards, creating a spiral staircase and several heaps of pulverised rock.
KSSSSHHHHHHH.

Okay, where did I come out? Oh. Good. Right underneath the town. I'm sure they'll be happy about the stairway to snakeville.
He frowns.
I wonder if I woke anyone up?

[Switch - Abed]
Did the earth just move?

>>334958
You are clearly under attack by Derro survivors. You must kill them!

>>334958
Yes, because you were having such awesome sex. Get some light turned on to check that nothing broke or fell down.

Psithief 2011/08/01(Mon)07:59 No. 335025 ID: 3bad4c
File 131221078463.png - (203.87KB , 1060x891 , 75.png )

>>334965
That awesome sex was hours ago. Thaae is trancing, Abed was sleeping sprawled over the bed.
Pff..light? Why do I never have any light?
Abed is unsure whether to activate her darkvision. She's not used to it, so it makes getting back to sleep kind of difficult. (Too bright to sleep)

A very dim light is coming in the window. Abed spends a few moments dreamily staring at Thaae's naked body. Then she goes to the window. She looks, and listens.
LISTEN CHECK - FAILURE SPOT CHECK - FAILURE
I don't even remember what woke me up.
She sighs.
Wanna pee, but don't wanna pee in the dark. Don't know where to find light. Gotta hold on until morning.

She collapses back onto the bed.

[Switch - Boose]
Hmm. I'd better get rid of these heads now.
He checks the job notice.

[Switch - Abed]
*Knock knock knock*
Alright..alright.
*Knock-kna-knock-ada-knock, knock-knock*
Abed opens the door.
"Hey, my door is not a drum!"
>"Niiiiiiice.. oh, here I have snake heads to turn in."
"What the fuck?!"

he's probably got the wrong address. tell him he has the wrong house.

>>335025
Darkvision on!
Tell him you don't want any snake heads.

>>335025
Tell him that you know a direction that his snake can head to.

Which doesn't really maky any sense, but you're tired and grumpy so shit doesn't have to make sense.

Abed, now is a perfect opportunity to pee.

>>335025
This guy's a total douche, Abed. Punch him in the face.

Psithief 2011/08/02(Tue)01:44 No. 335369 ID: 3bad4c
File 131227468886.png - (176.75KB , 1060x891 , 76.png )

>>335048 Manifest psionic darkvision, say 'no thx'
>>335046 say 'wrong house'
>>335115 say something incoherent
MANIFEST PSIONIC DARKVISION
The fuck? Now he's harder to see.
"I know where you can stick your snake, but it's not here! Also you stink."
>"But..but this notice it says this house!" He whines.
"New occupant, not interested," she replies, wearily.
>"Argh! I hate this place!" He stamps his foot on the stair.
Abed yawns. "Will you go now?"
>He pauses. "Fine, but before I go do you have any adventurer type work?"
What? Blah. "Yeah, maybe I do, but I'm not talking to some stinky half-invisible random guy in the middle of the night when I could be cuddled up to my girlfriend, especially when all he's going to do is stare at my body instead of talk business. Just be in the den at noon or whatever."
>"Really.. okay I'll" The door shuts in his face mid-sentence.

[Switch - Boose]
Boose stands at the door for a few more seconds.
Hot lesbians, and I can't watch. Hate this place sooo much.
He wanders off.

[Switch - Abed]
Why did I agree to meet him again? Ugh. So tired.
>>335303 Punch him in the face
Yeah. I'll get him good after I sleep.
>>335256 Pee.
Oh yeah. She does, now that she can see her way to the usual place for such things.
Then she goes back to bed.

>Hello beautiful.
Now that Abed knows Thaae is a telepath, Thaae's comfortable speaking directly to her mind.
Hi. You're done resting already? I'm jealous.
>I can teach you how, if you want.
I definitely want!
And so Thaae begins teaching Abed how to trance. It will take two weeks of such teaching sessions to complete, and will be completely useless if Thaae is not present.

(What happens the next day?)

>>335369
Well Boose comes over again, probably, and Abed holds an interview to decide if he's worthy for adventurer work or not. The test consists of him being able to dodge a surprise gutpunch followed by a knee to the face (would have been all wrong with double groin attacks) and ending with a stomp on the nuts. If he can then he's in, if he can't then he's a bitch and can do bitch work.

Psithief 2011/08/02(Tue)10:17 No. 335472 ID: 3bad4c
File 131230543256.png - (232.04KB , 1060x891 , 77.png )

The next day...

Abed's in the adventurer den, a glorified tavern for "the idiots that walk among us" as the rest of the community knows them. They're just jealous.
She's waiting for her new 'friend' to arrive.
>"Aha!"
She jolts.
"Alright." ffffff "Very funny. Sit down."
>"Very well."
Abed gets a piece of paper and a pencil out.
"Name?"
>"Boose."
"Skills?"
>"Stealth and ranged combat."
She jots these down, and a few other 'notes'.
"Very good. Come outside, we'll proceed to the practical test."
>"Really? That's it? Okay.."

Boose follows her outside.
"It's a very simple test," she says as they walk. "All you have to do is-"
She turns and punches at his gut.
INITIATIVE - SECOND TO ACT ATTACK d20+7 VS AC 18+4(full defence) - MISS
"-dodge. Wow, that was a pretty poor attack on my part."
>"Yeah, it was."
"Alright, alright. Then-" Be my slave, bastard.
CHARM GAZE DC 15 - FAILURE
>"Argh, what was that?"
"Another test. Uh, you passed."
BLUFF CHECK - SUCCESS
He looks skeptical for a second, but then seems to buy it.
Damn.
She sighs.
"Alright, fine. You can be backup on our next mission."
>"Great! What mission?"
Abed looks at the notice board.

"This one." She points at the one asking for help with the plague.
>"Oh..oh not that one. I don't want to get sick."
"Yes this one! Unless you want to go looking for the dragon. I've seen the dragon, he's veeeery dangerous."
He whimpers.
What a twit.
"I'll go pack. Be here in two hours, we'll pick up our third and get going."
>"..got it."
"Don't stare at my rear when I go, that's for sexy people only."
He turns away.
Weak willed fool.

Abed's now at Maldrimir's door.
Sorry I kept you waiting, Thaae. I hope this goes well.
>It's fine, Abed.
Thaae knocks on his door.
I think we'll be going on another mission today.
>Oh?
>"<Coming..>" It's Maldrimir's voice, of course.
Yeah, I don't know how long it will take.
>Do you want me to come with you?
I..I didn't even think about that!
(Invite Thaae to the party?)

>>335472
Nah, she will just be a distraction for you, and might get in the way of doing some more untasteful things that a murderhobo's life can demand out of one.

You are however free to sex their brains out before you leave. You know, something that will help you keep your mind on the task without distractions for at least a few hours.

>>335472
>(Invite Thaae to the party?)
Thaae is great, but putting her into dangerous situations where we will probably end up acting like a dick in the company of someone who makes her very nervous seems like a triple no to me. Without even getting into the group dynamic problems that bringing lovers along can cause.

We'll see her when we get back.

>>335472
Tell her you're confident in your skill because you've lived a harsh life, but you'd be distracted by worry if she went with you. You're more driven to get things done and go home if you have somebody waiting for you there.
While you'r gone have her invite Mal to share your home; seems like it would be ideal for somebody of your proclivities.

I dunno, would she want to come cure a plague?

Why do I keep drawing these things?! Psithief 2011/08/03(Wed)13:23 No. 336061 ID: 3bad4c
File 131240301135.png - (496.69KB , 1060x891 , 78.png )

Yes, I want you to come with me, but I don't think you should.
Thaae smiles.
>Okay.
Be brave now.
Maldrimir opens the door.
>"Hi girls."
>"Hi Maldrimir. Can we come in?"
>"Sure. Hi Abed, what's with the muscles?"
"Oh, nothing really. Just playing around." Or because Thaae likes muscles...
>Mmmmm.
>"Are either of you thirsty? Can I get you anything?"
>"No thanks, Mal. Can we sit down?"
>"Yeah, of course."

They sit down, Abed and Thaae on a comfortable couch, Mal in a comfortable chair.
He likes what he sees.
>Yes, a good man but no brain.
>"Mal, we need to talk.. it's about you and me, and Abed."
>"Oh, right. Yeah, I guess we should work out a fair way to share her, huh? Three days a week each, and a threesome on the remaining day?"
Abed can't help but laugh fondly.
>"Sweetie, it's not that. We've been together for a while now, but there's a problem. What I want and what you want isn't compatible anymore."
>"I..what?"
>"I've really enjoyed your body, Mal, but I don't feel the same way about you as you do about me. You're in love."
>"What? No I'm not.."
>That's a lie, by the way.
Keep going, Thaae.
>"Yes, I know. I thought it wouldn't matter though, but things have changed."
>"How!?"
>"I..I'm in love with Abed, Maldrimir. I want to have a real relationship with her. I can't do that and keep seeing you for sex."
Maldrimir just sits there, his mouth open in shock.
I feel bad for him.
>You're definitely worth saving if you can feel that.
Thanks!
He looks at Abed.
>"Abed..?"
"I'm sorry Mal.. Thaae and I have so much in common. I want to be with her too."
>"Abed, we should go, you have things to do. Mal, I'm sorry, I didn't think I'd find love."
>"Just..just go." He's trying so hard not to tear up.

Outside, Thaae and Abed embrace.
That must be tough.
>I could nearly feel his pain. I'm not proud of myself for using him like that.
I know. He'll be fine, though.
>I hope so.
So, you're going to be all mine then?
>Yes, Abed. All for you.
Do I do the same, then?
>I'd like you to, but I don't expect you to. Not yet. Just come home to me, for now that's all I need.
I will.
Thaae smiles, tearing up a bit.
>Be safe. She leaves for home.

Abed waits for a few minutes, then she knocks on Maldrimir's door again.
He takes a few minutes to open the door.
>"What?" he asks angrily, through tear-irritated eyes.
"I want to talk."
>"I don't want to."
"Too bad." With her superior strength, Abed shoves him back and closes the door behind her.
>"Are you going to hit me?"
"No, Mal." She grabs him, and hugs him. "I'm going to be your friend, 'cause you need one."
They sit on the couch. Maldrimir cries silently a little.
Finally, he says;
>"I want to be angry at you, but it's not your fault. I knew she wasn't interested in love. I just let her.." he trails off.
>"I just wanted sex too, at first. She's special though, and I got to be the one she let in, a bit."
"That's really tough, Mal, but I'll be here for you, and I'll take good care of Thaae too."
>"Thanks. This is weird though. I mean, you've got her and you're going out of your way to make me feel better."
"If you like weird, we can fuck right now."
>"...be small and sexy for me."
"Yes sir!" I'll even scream for you.
CHANGE SHAPE

Abed screams like a little bitch that's being taught a lesson as Maldrimir pumps her roughly.

Later, Abed leaves Maldrimir's home. She sits down on the steps, puts her head in her hands, and thinks I am so damaged.
She rushes home, grabs her pack, sword and shield, and rushes to the adventurer den.

[Switch - Boose]
Holy shits, did she shrink? She doesn't look imposing at all anymore! How should I react to this?

be curious.

>>336061
Ask if she got smaller as some sort of ruse to make you feel more at ease. Seems like you can't trust anything in elfville.

Psithief 2011/08/04(Thu)09:03 No. 336448 ID: 3bad4c
File 131247378688.png - (170.51KB , 1060x891 , 79.png )

"What are you? Are you messing with me?"
>"Amateur shapechanger, come on now." She skips off.
She's humming.
Boose follows behind.
"Did you just get laid?" 'cause you're glowing..
>"I sure did. Mmm." She continues humming.
Argh, I want some of that.

[Switch - Abed]
Do, doo, doo doo do doot.

[Switch - Boose]
The two of them leave the town and march towards the derro caverns.
She finds the rope and climbs down.
>"Come on in."
Booze climbs down. It's dark.
>"Yeah, I'm bringing someone new. No, I'm not. Really! I don't know."
She seems to be having a one-sided conversation with herself.
What have I gotten myself into?
MANIFEST PSIONIC DARKVISION
>"Oh that's great. I bought you a pack, too."
"Are you talking to the voices?"
She makes a show of talking to her ring.
"Oh, you're on the phone. Got it."
She raises an eyebrow, but then continues to chatter away.

They walk for twenty minutes, the girl keeps her one-sided conversation up. She's giggling and cheerful, completely different from the interview.
>"There she is! Hello!" She's seen her ally.
The woman is an elf in a long white coat. She has deep red hair and piercing eyes. Her gaze is as cold as stone when he looks at her, but softens when she looks at the girl.
>"Versparki! I can't wait to see what you've got under that coat."
>"It is delightful. I feel whole." There's a clicking sound as she speaks.
>"You're so twisted, haha! Alright, this is Boose. He says he's sneaky."
>"He is, I can't see him." Click clack.
>"Oh, me either, but I can hear him." She turns in his general direction. "I can hear his blood, and it's all in one place at the moment."
>"Where did you find him, Abed?" Clack click clack.
So that's her name. Huh. Strange name.
>"He came to my door in the middle of the night, wanted to give me some snake." She hip thrusts. "I turned him down."
>"Really? That's unusual of you." Click.
>"He's very offputting once you let him speak. I'm in a good mood though, and I'm looking to share some blood and gore with you Versparki."
>"Abed, you're so romantic." Click click.
Yep, my detect adventurer sense is tingling.
>"So is there anything to see down here?"
>"Not yet. I will go pack, thank you for bringing this bag." Clack. Click clack.
>"You're welcome! Hey, let's use that orb now."
>"You may deal with it." Versparki gives Abed a small dark orb, then leaves.
>"Boose!"
"Yes?"
>"I want you to eat this." She holds out the orb.
"What?!"
>"Come on, it'll be fun. What can I do to convince you?" She's got a mischevious little grin on her face.
Uh..? Well..

>>336448
I'm sure you have been told not to eat stuff given to you by mysterious strangers and stuff. But you're also in a somewhat shitty situation where they could probably kill you and nobody would miss you. So I guess ask what the thing does and then maybe ask for a handjob.

>>336453
Boose can give himself a handjob. Ask for anal.

Yes, you must ask for buttsecks!

Psithief 2011/08/05(Fri)05:31 No. 336798 ID: 3bad4c
File 131254751039.png - (196.98KB , 1060x891 , 80.png )

Boose whispers his request to Abed. She chortles.
>"Now this is the part where I tell you this orb is actually a magic item with the power of darkness, perfect for someone like you. I have it, and you want it, so I suppose it's only fair that I get to shove something into your arse, right?"
"You.. bitch!"
She laughs at him.
>"Maybe I should eat it then, since that's not a price you're willing to pay?" She raises the globe to her mouth as if to take a bite. "Mmm, power of darkness."
She closes her eyes and licks the globe like she's pleasuring it.
Tease!

He then notices a small creature coming from a tunnel behind her.
"Derro!" he shouts, grabbing his pistols.
>"Huh? Wait.."

it's Vesparki's zombie. don't shoot it.

>>336798
Oh that's just an undead abomination they keep around as a minion, probably. But it's likely a better idea to inform her of it and let her handle it than shooting at it, she might misunderstand it and think you're attacking her and then fist you with an orb of shadows or whatever it is, which would probably be a bit unpleasant at first.

And so Abed convinced Boose not to shoot the zombie, and Versparki returned.
Abed told Boose that Versparki was an undead monster, and that she was a monster, but he should run away because they were both totally loaded with money.
Then Abed emptied her magic bag on the cavern floor, and Boose was like 'OMG, so much monies.'
Then Boose asked why they wanted him, and they said they liked the idea of having a sneaky person.
What was in it for him?, he asked. They said mostly just monies and power.
He told Abed that he would join them if she gave him sex.
She said she was not interested, and would never be interested in giving him sex.
So he haggled, and eventually he got to touch her boobs.

Then they adventured to find and stop the plague of approaching doom.
THE END.

>>337008
What.

>>337010

What.

>>337046
that's what