A MAN IS DESERT ISLAND. Only on island is tree where is baboon what only sing jap cartoon shitty theme song. Man cannot only bravery substain because it is hot and desert.
"My le manly intuition saying la princesse in le underground vault location le pub basement."
>>262464 NOOOOO! Warn him about impending stabbings and throw something to distract the vile anglais.
>>262464 YOU BEHIND KNIFE WITH BRITTISH MANS!
>>262464 Blinking weakens Michael Caine. Exhale your foul continental-cheese-afflicted breath into his face.
"I bloody well warned you. Now it's too late, old chap."
>>262472 Oh fuck, only one thing to do now. Smash a bottle against a table, tell him to come at you and hope that the frenchy isn't completly down yet. That or that you manage to somehow summon Satan in your time of need.
Start busting the beer kegs and beer bottles and stuff. Without booze the English realize their horribly oppressed nature and lose all strength.
Use your super jumping skills to get in to your tank all fast-like.
>>262477 agreed weapons are nice hehehe... maybe the monkey somehow survived and could help out... naw that would be stupid.
Tell him you have his bloody wanker of a queen hostage in your tank and that if he doesn't give you all his weapons and surrender you'll be forced to make sweet love to her.
Challenge him to a traditional English super battle tank super special stage death rally.
Shout "Feuer der kanonen, schnell schnell!" and hope the tank has voice commands.
>>Shout "Feuer der kanonen, schnell schnell!" "You bastard... that's not fair..."
>>262646 Step back. They're at their most dangerous when mortally wounded.
>>262646 Mate, that's just not cricket, You're completely fucked now. Hope to hell his Aussie mates don't show up.
>>262646 Grab cannon barrel and with great force spinning!
>>262646 Step back, he looks like he's about to make a last ditch throw of the knife. Instead go to your french companion. He might not be yet gone, bandage life his might save.
>>Step back Cannot hurting chance.
>>262664 Now go tend to frenchy, he saved your ass more than once, he deserves either care or manly tears.
>>262664 Keep stepping back until you fall into the basement, thus making the best possible impression on the princess.
>>fall into the basement FUCK AM OF FALL DOWN ALL STAIR... IT CONSTANT HAPPENING
Fall with more style
I TOLD BRO TALKED ME REGARD STEPS MANY
Cannot style!
>>262694 You're semi-alive, that's good enuff. Open dat door.
open that door and claim what is rightfully yours (and by that I mean evrything in the room)
IT IS TIME TO PRINCESS
>>262680 I fucking lost it.
>>262694 Pick yourself up, open door, receive princess. ...Alternatively, receive beating, administer beating, THEN receive princess.
Now open door of very heavy! Certainty not very trap of booby?
I don't think a heavy door like that would NEED booby traps.
>>266428 There might be boobies on the princess. So force the door open already.
>>So force the door open already.
"Mida kuradit siin toimub?"
>>266454 finaly a problem solved by punching. greet her with a quick face-fixer.
Well.... The boobs are alright, no matter what the fuck the face. Save her like the fist of the northstar.
remove mouth-nose chopsicks and apply kiss to asert your saving-ism
Attempt to rescue the princess.
>>266454 Rescue the shit out of that princess. And find a paper bag somewhere.
>>rescue the princess "On aeg seiklus!" Well, does counting as rescue of success?
>>266608 Looks pretty rescued to me. Now go cry at the body of your dead companion. He saved you from the island and fought alongside you against the brits.
Well, was very adventure but sea man must always sea. Thus returning princess and refuse offer for princess hand and realm of half, due to sea man need sea and only bravery! And that is difference escapade which not show here.
That sure was something. I have no idea what exactly, but I'm sure it was that. Also draw celebratory porn.
>>266792 >>draw celebratory porn
This was beautiful
*manly tears* Best quest or best quest ever?
This has been one of the finest on this board in some period of time. I congratulation you.
That was probably the best quest I've ever read.
CONGLATURATION! YOU'RE WINNER!