Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)18:42 No. 17512 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124891815718.gif - (3.82KB , 400x400 , 109.gif )

Kara wakes up to the sound of knocking. After a few seconds, she realizes it's coming from her front door.
She has no idea how long she's been out, but that's normal.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)18:43 No. 17513 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124891818287.gif - (3.92KB , 400x400 , 110.gif )

George is here.

Kara's DRUNK Status is BUZZED
Kara's ANGER Status is ANNOYED

>>17513
Grab SHOTGUN. Answer DOOR.

>>17513
Pick up George, hug.
Then drop him again.
Shamble to the door and prepare a tirade of cursing.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)18:57 No. 17529 ID: 9ac8e2
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>>17515 >>17516
> Answer DOOR
> Tirade of Cursing
Oh yeah. She has some good ones, too.

Oh. Hello.

"Ma'am, have you seen any-- actually, you look like you match the description. Would you mind coming with us, please?"

>>17529
HOW DO YOU SHOT MIB

Wait, you know how. DO IT.

>>17529
>Would you mind coming with us, please?
Yes.
SHOTGUN'D

Yes. Yes I would mind. Is this going to be a problem?

Please tell me this is going to be a problem.

>>17529
Pull him inside.
Beat the shit out of him, then force George to shoot him as a test of loyalty.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)20:04 No. 17564 ID: 9ac8e2
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>>17530 >>17531
> SHOTGUN.
"Why, yes. Yes I would mind."

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)20:05 No. 17566 ID: 9ac8e2
File 12489231207.gif - (5.82KB , 400x400 , 114.gif )

"Is this going to be a problem? Please tell me--hey, wait, GET BACK HERE."

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)20:06 No. 17569 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124892320730.gif - (5.48KB , 400x400 , 115.gif )

The MIBs have opened fire! Well, some of them, anyway.
Kara shoots the closest one, who goes down. The Scrubber is busy diving for cover.
Ahahaha! Do we have a plan, or shall we just randomly slaughter people?!

>>17567
Duck back inside, use wall of house for cover, play this like an arcade shoot em up and kill them while they reload.

>>17569
Take cover yourself, wait for an opportunity. Make sure George keeps his dumb ass behind a wall at least.

Chuck a gnome at the big one as a distraction. Shoot out the window for cover.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)21:52 No. 17735 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124892952433.gif - (4.75KB , 400x400 , 116.gif )

>>17570 >>17573
> Duck And Cover!
Kara ducks back inside, firing out from behind the crack in the door. Another Sweeper goes down, as bullets fire against the house.
Haha! Losers. They can't possibly hit her in here.

>>17579
> Gnome Tossing
Kara's not going to throw her lawn gnomes! They're one of the few things that bring her any damn happiness in the world.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)21:52 No. 17736 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124892953992.gif - (6.43KB , 400x400 , 117.gif )

FUCK HOLY SHIT.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)21:54 No. 17739 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124892964615.gif - (4.85KB , 400x400 , 118.gif )

GOD DAMN SCRUBBERS.

Kara has lost her FRONT DOOR.
Kara is wounded.

Fight fire with fire! Where'd you put that grenade launcher?

>>17739
Check GNOMES.
Tell George to start firing.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)23:20 No. 17806 ID: 9ac8e2
File 12489348082.gif - (5.72KB , 400x400 , 119.gif )

>>17742
> Explosions Solve Everything
Ahah! Kara has it right here, in her inventory.
CLEANUP TIME.

>>17772
> Check GNOMES.
Thankfully, the lawn gnomes were far enough from the explosion to escape damage.
Good thing, too, or Kara might've entered an UNSTOPPABLE RAGE.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)23:20 No. 17808 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124893483513.gif - (6.33KB , 400x400 , 120.gif )

Huh. That's the first time Kara's ever seen a Sweeper dodge something.
The Scrubber is down, but not out. Hanging by a thread, though.
Of course, the truck is fine, though Kara thinks she heard the back tire blow. And a few beer bottles didn't survive the explosion.

> Tell George to start firing.
George manages to wing the truck. That's... that's fantastic.

>>17808
That is amazing, he's been using them for all of a day now?
Finish this fight off and give him celebratory noserubs.

Finish off the big one, hunt down and capture the fleeing one. Then use him for something hostage-y.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/29(Wed)23:50 No. 17823 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124893663872.gif - (5.90KB , 400x400 , 121.gif )

> FINISH HIM.
Not even worth a grenade, Kara finishes him off with a pistol. It's more spiteful that way.
George gives her a thumbs up.

The remaining MIB is already out of view. Kara can hear a car starting up, though.

WHAT NOW?

>>17823


observe source of car starting noise..which is presumably a car.

Obligatory high-speed chase.

Alternately, bandages. You are bleeding some there.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)01:42 No. 17866 ID: 9ac8e2
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>>17825
> Car?
It is indeed a car.
Kara could probably go after it, but she'd have to start the truck, and the car is already halfway down the street.
Besides, Kara is SOBER enough to figure out they're most likely heading back to their HQ.
Either way, they know where she lives now.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)01:42 No. 17867 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124894335074.gif - (5.19KB , 400x400 , 123.gif )

>>17826
> Alternately, bandages. You are bleeding some there.
So she is. Kara heads into her kitchen to apply first aid, instead of going after a bunch of low tier assholes. Well, it's more like cloth wraps and bandaids, really, but it stops the bleeding.
Boy, it sure would be nice if we had a HEALER. But we don't. So fuck that.
She'll be fine, anyway.
Now what do we do?

>>17867
so find the little magical girl again and recruit her for your gang.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)02:17 No. 17870 ID: 9ac8e2
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>>17869
> Find Hope
A brilliant idea, but Kara has no idea where to find her, or even start looking.
Hope wasn't here when she woke up, and Kara never asked the little snot where she lived, or anything about her.
All she knows is she likes seeing MIBs get the crap kicked out of them.

Besides, Kara's TOUGH. Honestly, a little thing like getting hit by a grenade isn't going to slow her down too much.
Perhaps we should just do something else, and hope she appears at some point.
Unless you have some surefire way to track down underage schoolgirls?

>>17870
To the candy store!

>>17870
...I just might.

Well you could try the church again. She seemed to be hanging around there for no reason before.

>>17871
That guy knows how to get underaged girls. Just paint "Free Candy" on the side of your truck and drive around.

>>17870
Well, the school might be a good start, or heading back to the church where you found her the first time.

She might be annoying, but her magic could be useful and besides it's always fun to have someone annoying around you can harass for fun.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)10:31 No. 17998 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124897509745.gif - (3.51KB , 400x400 , KaraIsNotAmusedByYourFaggotry.gif )

>>17871 >>17878
> Unmarked Van

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)10:31 No. 17999 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124897511441.gif - (4.77KB , 400x400 , 125.gif )

Kara's DRUNK Status has increased to MILDLY SOZZLED.

Well, here we are at the CHURCH. Unfortunately, Hope is nowhere to be seen.
Actually, neither is the priest that married her. Actually, she didn't see him around when she met Hope, either.
There is, however, a NUN here. Should she ask her about the brat?

>>17999
Sure, she might know.

Plus you might consider, AFTER getting an answer, planting a smooch on her to help her realize what she's missin' by being a nun.

Ask her if this is even the same church you were married at the other day.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)11:36 No. 18034 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124897901321.gif - (4.17KB , 400x400 , 127.gif )

>>18000
> Hope?

The nun does indeed know of hope! It can be found right here, in this building, with the good word of--
oh. Oh, the child. Yes! She knows that, too.

Hope is a precious little cherub and yayablahblahyaya, anyway, apparently Hope started coming here after all the WEIRD MAGIC SHIT started, and heals people occasionally.
Doesn't ask for anything, though she is building up a reputation as a little angel and it's so nice to have children take an interest and

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)11:37 No. 18035 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124897904199.gif - (3.74KB , 400x400 , 128.gif )

> SHUT UP NUN

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)11:37 No. 18036 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124897905599.gif - (4.29KB , 400x400 , 129.gif )

"S-she also works part time at the library."

Nun rape George

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)11:39 No. 18038 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124897915077.gif - (4.81KB , 400x400 , 130.gif )

Well! You heard the nun. Hope works at the library.
If she isn't there, they should at least know where she lives.
Should we go?

>>18038
To the library! Our work here is done, shaking the faith of the nun.

Yeah library, also pat Georges head, but not to hard.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)12:03 No. 18046 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124898057885.gif - (5.54KB , 400x400 , 131.gif )

> Library!
Library!

Oh, look, there she is. Boy, doesn't she look pleased to see us.

>>18046
Give her a hello kiss~

"Hey, turns out those MIBs know where I live somehow. And they blew up my door."

Tell her how you just killed a squad of MIB's.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)12:37 No. 18060 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124898265945.gif - (4.16KB , 400x400 , 132.gif )

>>18048
> Kiss~
Kara settles for blowing one. Further molestation can come later~

Hope is quick to ask what the hell Kara wants.

>>18050
> "Turns out those MIBs found out where I live somehow. And they blew up my door."

"Well, of course they did. They're a highly volatile organization that's taken control of the city, and you've been killing them. Did you think they wouldn't come after you?"

"... do you need healing?"

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)12:38 No. 18062 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124898268345.gif - (4.12KB , 400x400 , 133.gif )

> Healing?
Oh yeah, haha, and these bandages have totally been here the whole time, too!

>>18062
Yes, Hope, I need healing.

Also I was hoping you wanted to come along with us again.

"We could give you stuff. Like looted guns. Everyone likes guns, right?"

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)13:48 No. 18088 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124898691834.gif - (4.74KB , 400x400 , 134.gif )

>>18063
> "Yes, Hope, I need healing."
Hope gives a tiny sigh, before healing Kara's wounds with magic. As if to signify this, her bandages unfurl themselves, their purpose no longer required.

>>18063 >>18066 >>18054
> "... Also I was hoping you wanted to come along with us again."
> "We could give you stuff. Like looted guns. Everyone likes guns, right?"
> "... I killed a squad of MIBs!"
"I don't use guns. I told you, remember? I don't like hurting people. But it's perfectly okay if YOU do it."

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)13:49 No. 18091 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124898696582.gif - (3.89KB , 400x400 , 135.gif )

"As long as you fight the MIBs, I'll happilly follow you wherever you want to go! But the only way to stop them would be to get rid of Rastin himself. Which means you'd need to figure out a way into the Paraply building, and then find a way to stop Rastin and his incredibly powerful MAGIC CRYSTAL, which he's going to use to rule the world!"
"I'll help you as much as I can, as long as you at least TRY to stop Rastin at SOME point."
"And I'm not sleeping in the same house as you."
"... you haven't really been planning very much, have you?"

"Plah... ning?"

>>18091
"hell no i havent"

Find a very large vehicle which you can use to break down the door.

Go somewhere to buy a dozen spare tires. Replace the two blown out ones.

>>18091
Planning is for NERDS.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/07/30(Thu)15:25 No. 18184 ID: 9ac8e2
File 124899273894.gif - (4.06KB , 400x400 , 136.gif )

> "Plah... ning? Hah! Hell no I haven't. Planning is for NERDS."
Hope remains notably silent.

>>18093
> "Let's just blow through the front doors in the truck. It's practically an armoured car."
"... yeeeaaahhh. Okay. I guess that would technically work."
"You realize Paraply is swarming with guards, though, right?"
"It's not like Rastin's going to just be sitting around on the first floor, anyway, so you couldn't even drive the truck all the way through. He's actually in the sub-basement, with the crystal, where it's safe."
"We can go right now, but if there's anything you wanted to do beforehand, you should probably do it first."

...

>>18101
> Repair Truck
It occurs to Kara that she doesn't actually have any MONEY. She has twenty dollars, but that's hardly enough to do anything. She spent everything else on beer and ammo.
She has no regrets.

'Preparing for Rastin' is a pretty broad idea. There's a lot Kara could do, and really no qualifier for when she's 'ready'.
She could probably do all kinds of random bullshit, as long as she can convince Hope it falls under the realm of 'preparing'. On the other hand, MIBs will keep harrassing her as long as Rastin is around, and Rastin's probably planning to do something really sinister given enough time.

tl;dr

Kara could load up on equipment, allies, or anything else she can think of within the realms of believability, all of which would take time and QUESTing.
Or she could go after Rastin now, and damned be the consequences. Who cares?!

Drive to Paraply building
Use truck as battering ram to break door
Use grenade launcher to destroy any walls in your path to the sub basement

>>18184
Find SIDEQUESTS to build up money, weaponry and Allies for the assault.

>>18184
Hey! George! Don't touch her butt! That's for me to do!

Lets SIDEQUEST the hell out of some random pub. See if some easily swayed surly truckers might not be tempted to aid us.

Maybe we should grind some Sweepers to gain money and experience for George.
Also combine your shotgun and 'nade launcher already, with duct tape.

>>18184
Do DEMEANING SIDEQUESTS to earn MONEY

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)15:32 No. 24210 ID: cd08c0
File 124968435519.gif - (5.03KB , 400x400 , 137.gif )

>>18221 >>18684 >>18697
> SIDEQUESTS
OKAY

Kara decides that now is the time to ACQUIRE MORE FIREPOWER.

NEW QUEST UNLOCKED: ACQUIRE MORE FIREPOWER.
Current Quests: Stop Rastin, ACQUIRE MORE FIREPOWER
Completed Quests: Marry George

NOW WHERE TO START

>>18684
> some random pub

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)15:33 No. 24212 ID: cd08c0
File 12496844324.gif - (3.53KB , 400x400 , 138.gif )

TO THE ALCOHOL

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)15:34 No. 24213 ID: cd08c0
File 12496844577.gif - (4.35KB , 400x400 , 139.gif )

Kara takes stock of her possessions on the way over.
She has 20 Dollars, and is carrying:
An Ant Farm, Bottle of Tranquilizer Pills, Clarice, Grenade Launcher, Two Grenades, Key to the BIGASS TRUCK, MIB Suit, Two Pistols, Shotgun, Cup of SUPER COFFEE, Four Pairs of Yellow Sunglasses, and a SHITLOAD OF AMMO.

Furthermore, Hope is carrying a CELL PHONE, and a MANUAL, and has $1.50.
George is carrying the PISTOL we gave him earlier.

There is a FAT GUY and a BARTENDER here. What the fuck do we do.

>>24211
Ask about MAGIC GUNS.
Refuse spurious invitations to 'Gun Shows'.

Tell trucker that Rastin has taken away his NASCAR. Ask him if he wants to go kick Rastin's ass.

Ask what they think about all these annoying MIBs. If they're as annoyed as you, ask if they want to help.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)16:46 No. 24263 ID: cd08c0
File 124968878890.gif - (4.38KB , 400x400 , 140.gif )

>>24216 >>24218
> YOU LOOK LIKE MIGHTY WARRIORS

The FAT GUY is named PREVOUS, and asks how the hell Kara knew he used to be a trucker, but he's not anymore. He works with his six siblings at the SEVEN DEADLY SAMMICHES shop. Except he's not allowed in the store now since that time he ate all the merchandise.
Prevous says he's STRONG, and can TAKE A BULLET LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS. He'll join if Kara will pay him in food.

The BARTENDER says his name is LANCE. He doesn't actually own this place -- he's working off a debt for things he says you don't need to know about.
Lance says he is FAST, and is an IMPECCABLY GOOD SHOT. He can also do shadier, sneaky things. He'll join if you give him a weapon, and possession of any CATS we may find.

Neither of them are fans of Rastin or the MIBs. Neither of them have guns, either, although Prevous has a FRYING PAN, and Lance has a SWITCHBLADE.

>>24263
hire LANCE (give him our spare handgun), contemplate sammich to success ratio of PREVIOUS.

>>24263
Well SIGN THOSE MOTHERS UP. A pistol each, we'll get sammiches after the next fight.

Now where would experimental weaponry be hiding in a city like this, any input from them?

Well, that's easy. Give them the two spare pistols, and the promises of any food to be found (maybe buying some here to start off, if they have any). Then, it's - wait. Why does he have a frying pan?

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)18:08 No. 24348 ID: cd08c0
File 124969370067.gif - (4.71KB , 400x400 , 141.gif )

>>24264 >>24266 >>24270
> SIGN THOSE MOTHERS UP.
> Food for Prevous?
Prevous politely informs Kara that she doesn't have nearly enough money to pay for his required food intake. But that's okay, he's out of money and will follow her on the mere PROMISE OF FOOD.
As long as Kara gives him a meal before the end of the day, or before they assault Rastin's Headquarters, he'll happilly waddle behind her.

Lance and Prevous join the party! PISTOLS have been handed over.


>>24270
> Why does he have a frying pan?
Prevous says it's for preparing food, and for beating the shit out of things that aren't food.


>>24214 >>24266
> Where can I find MAGIC WEAPONS
Prevous has no fucking clue. Kara quickly pegs him as exactly the sortof person who thinks 'standing up front and taking damage' is a damn fine accomplishment.

Lance says if you're looking for experts on WEIRD MAGIC SHIZ, there are only two options: you've got Rastin and his highest ranking MIBs, and then there's IGNOMETICS, who came into existance shortly after Rastin appeared.

IGNOMETICS is apparently a group of friendly scientists dedicated to researching WEIRD MAGIC SHIZ. They record and duplicate and Lance doesn't like explaining shit so here's the important bit:
Ignometics will pay HUGE MONEYS for anything related to magic they can research, and will also happilly enchant things, which also costs HUGE MONEYS.
It's a burgeoning science, hence all the money being thrown around.


Anyway that's enough exposition NOW WHAT.

Well shit. Do we have any weird magical shit? HUGE MONEYS sounds like a boon right now.

Hope can do WEIRD MAGIC SHIZ, right? Can they research her without dissecting her?

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)18:40 No. 24373 ID: cd08c0
File 124969564937.gif - (4.69KB , 400x400 , 142.gif )

>>24354
> Do we have weird magical shit?
Out of our new party of five, Hope is the only one who can cast magic. Hope has a HEALING TOUCH, which can cure physical wounds, but does fuck all for anything else.
We also have George, whose, according to Hope, very EXISTANCE is caused by weird magical shit. If Rastin hadn't started pumping the air full of magic shiz, George would not exist.
By association, that probably means the zombie we killed way WAY earlier counts as weird magical shit as well.

We could probably show any of these to Ignometics, and get paid HUGE MONEYS.

>>24373
Time to go zombie huntan.
A truckload of slurry should work, right?

I believe we left the zombie corpse lying on the street outside Kara's house. Hopefully they don't want a live one. Er, dead one. ... you know what I mean.

Sounds like we can go for the trifecta. Zombie-hunting time. Back to the old neighborhood!

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)20:38 No. 24478 ID: cd08c0
File 124970273443.gif - (6.42KB , 400x400 , 143.gif )

>>24378 >>24381 >>24383
> LET'S GO FUCK UP SOME ZOMBIES
The zombie we killed the first time through seems to be missing. Actually, so do the MIBs, for that matter.
That's not really a concern, though, because we've found replacements.

Wow, these were the first enemies Kara fought, and now she's got better weapons AND backup.
These guys are so fucking toast.

>>24378
> A truckload of slurry should work, right?
Lance mentions that Ignometics does generally prefer their specimens to be as intact as possible. Failure to comply may result in a reduction in pay.
Fucking DAMNIT.

>>24478
Can we salvage lockers or some other kind of holding device to keep the zombies in?
Granted, stuffing them in might prove a challenge, but...

Ask Hope if HEALING TOUCH makes zombies more INTACT or more DEAD.

For that matter, if we could cure a zombie to death, its body may be very well intact. The bad news is that this plan involves sicing a nerdy schoolgirl on the undead.

Our fridge full of beer! That could probably fit a couple zombies. Also, beer for everyone.

Does the truck have a spare tire? Maybe you could knock out the metal part and force a couple zombies into the tire part.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)21:38 No. 24493 ID: cd08c0
File 124970628546.gif - (5.41KB , 400x400 , 144.gif )

>>24482
> I CANZ HEAL ZOMBIES?
Hope says she has no idea, and she's not really interested in walking up to one to find out.

>>24485
> BEER FOR EVERYONE
Prevous heartilly supports this idea.
Kara, however, is not about to unplug her heavyass refrigerator and empty it out to hold zombies. Even if she got enough money to replace it, previous experience tells her she probably doesn't have the attention span. She needs that fridge to cool her beer.

>>24479
> Holding devices!
Kara has no other locker-like devices with which to hold zombies. The truck, being a TRUCK, does not even have a trunk. She has no rope, no restraints, nothing except her four party members and their respective inventories.
If she wants them as is, she'll have to do something ingenious.

Or she could just hope Ignometics will pay her for zombies that have been slightly mangled.

>>24490
Find something large and flat, like plywood; preferably sheet metal.
Throw zombies in the back of the truck until it is almost full.
Get other party members to tie the sheet metal on top, or just sit on it.
Drive to Dianetics or wherever.
???
PROFIT

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/07(Fri)22:14 No. 24504 ID: cd08c0
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>>24491
> Spare tires?
That's pretty ingenious! But sadly no. In fact, if Kara had spare tires, they would probably go to replace the two on the truck that have been completely blown by explosions.

>>24494
> SIT ON IT, POTSIE
PREVOUS IS BORED. FUCK YOUR SHEET METAL.
Prevous drags a zombie into the truck and sits on top of it. Kara thinks she hear a bone crack.
It looks pretty effectively pinned.

Time for profit! Be sure to convert some of this profit into food for Prevous.

>>24504
A cracked rib? Hope, you'd better heal that before we get to the laboratory - after all, we need the specimen intact

>>24509
It's a zombie. I'm sure a cracked rib is the least of its injuries.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/09(Sun)13:58 No. 25789 ID: cd08c0
File 124985150740.gif - (5.04KB , 400x400 , 146.gif )

>>24505
> TIME FOR PROFIT

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/09(Sun)13:59 No. 25790 ID: cd08c0
File 124985154584.gif - (6.79KB , 400x400 , 147.gif )

>>25789
On the way in, Kara shoves aside some PANSYASS LAWYER who was on his way out.
Nobody cares!

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/09(Sun)13:59 No. 25791 ID: cd08c0
File 124985156959.gif - (4.51KB , 400x400 , 148.gif )

> PROFIT?
The people inside seem a little freaked out. You'd think they'd never seen three armed adventurers bust in with a zombie, a schoolgirl, and a cutething before.

>>25791
Holler out for the person in charge of zombie buying, because you've got a prime specimen.

>>25791
"HEY NERDS
WE BROUGHT YOU A ZOMBIE
HOW MUCH YOU PAYIN'"

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)15:27 No. 27023 ID: cd08c0
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>>25792 >>25796
> Holler out for the person in charge of zombie buying, because you've got a prime specimen.
"OH JESUS don't hurt me."

This loser introduces himself as JAY. He's basically in charge around here.
For your mostly intact zombie, Jay offers to pay $9500.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)15:27 No. 27024 ID: cd08c0
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> PROFIT
Kara's funding is now $9520! We can buy shit now!
Jay says he will pay up to $500 for any additional zombies Kara brings in! Or he'll pay her $10000 dollars if he can poke at this WEIRDASS CUTETHING that's standing right behind her.

>>27024
If he's not in the same shape as he was when you got him, I'll cut you.
With a gun.

>>27024
NOT GEORGE
HE IS YOUR HUSBANDO

>>27024
i'll have you know that's my husband. that said, >>27034

>>27024
Nooooo not George he's our noserubber!

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)16:21 No. 27098 ID: cd08c0
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>>27038
> "I'll have you know, that's my husband."
"... Okay."

>>27034
> "If he's not in the same shape as he was when you got him, I'll cut you."
> "With a gun."
Jay assures Kara that they have the means to examine George without hurting him.
In fact, they'd really prefer if all their specimens are alive, because they can learn more from a living subject than a dead one. Dissection is reserved for things that are already dead.

>>27100
congradulate george, take him someplace he wants to go; he just got you 20(?)k, he deserves something special.
i suggest icecream for everyone, especially since you still need to feed PREVIOUS.

>>27100
Any specific bounties that would pay more?
Or gigs that would be paid in other favors, like armed backup or MAJIK WEPONS?

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)16:28 No. 27107 ID: cd08c0
File 124994693475.gif - (5.86KB , 400x400 , 152.gif )

> Give George a poke
Jay leads Kara further into the building, where they hook George up to a bunch of funny machines and say a lot of funny words and do a lot of funny things that Kara doesn't give a crap about. It takes about an hour.
They seem pretty happy, though, and Kara gets her money.
Kara now has $19520! Woo.

Much happier now that they've gotten to learn... whatever, Jay brazenly asks Kara if there's anything else she needs.

>>27103
Typo. And fixed. Kara has (sadly) only received 10k.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)16:45 No. 27119 ID: cd08c0
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>>27105
> Any specific bounties that would pay more?
> Or armed backup or MAJIK WEPONS?

Jay says there's nothing specific they can ask of you: They'll pay around $10000, give or take, for new magical discoveries, should you find any. The thing about new discoveries being that they are new, hence undiscovered, hence Jay can't really tell you where to look.
They'll also pay up to $1000 for new samples of old discoveries. Zombies are usually in pretty bad shape already, but Kara will still get some money for bringing them in.

Jay is also willing to let her test some new items they've been developing, and pay her a small commission for it, but he'll be the one to decide what she gets.

And, of course, Kara can PURCHASE magic, which runs around $5000 per enchantment, except for, possibly, really huge complex ones, which may run higher.

Sadly, Jay says that he and his fellow nerd scientists here aren't fighters. The only thing they can offer Kara is the fruits of their research.

>>27119
still need to feed PREVIOUS and reward GEORGE. nerds are gonna be here when you come back, since they're nerds.

>>27119
Do they have anything to test right now?

>>27119
See if we can get an invincible liver enhancement.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)18:45 No. 27197 ID: cd08c0
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>> 27131
> What's there to test?
Jay gives Kara a short list.

BOOST BOOTS : These are the beta version of what Jay hopes to eventually turn into JET BOOTS. They should allow the wearer to hover to a limited degree, and increase jumping ability.

DUCT TAPE OF HOLDING : Repairs inanimate objects and offers hypothetically unlimited support power. Most of the bugs have been worked out, and Jay just wants to see how it serves under 'heavy duty work conditions'. Can also serve as regular duct tape.

LOTION OF CAT ATTRACTION : Exactly what it says. Splash on target to activate.

MOX WAND : Completely accidental creation! Produces pretty near random magical effects, as far as we can tell. It looks like a tiny cane -- like something a dapper gentleman would have. Almost entirely untested. Point and be amused.

In exchange for testing one or all of these, Kara will also recieve a free MAGIC DETECTOR, which... detects magic, and gives a readout for how powerful the source is. This information will then be transmitted back to Ignometics for further study.
Kara will recieve $500 for each one of these Kara decides to test.

Jay reiterates that most of these are, of course, in the TESTING phase, so unexpected side effects may arise.
They're probably mostly safe, though.
Maybe probably.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)18:46 No. 27198 ID: cd08c0
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>>27141
> See if we can get an invincible liver enhancement.
"Well, see, we tried that once. But when we finished, everyone on the project got horribly drunk to celebrate, and trashed all their research. Ask again next year."

>>27122
> still need to feed PREVOUS
George can't talk, so Kara asks Prevous what he likes to eat.

...

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)18:46 No. 27199 ID: cd08c0
File 124995518938.gif - (4.66KB , 400x400 , 156.gif )

...

Alternatively, Prevous says he wouldn't mind eatting sammiches, if just so he can rub his sudden wealth of money in his sister's face.

>>27199
give mox wand to george
give cat lotion to lance
give boost boots to PREVIOUS, start calling him PAY'J

>>27201
And taking the duct tape's a given. Try it on the truck/tires.

>>27214

Try duct taping dead people

Try duct taping zombies

duct tape a spent bullet to see if it can then be used again

duct tape THE ENTIRE TRUCK.

And then give it a second coat of duct tape.

We will make this thing a monster far greater than it's makers ever intended.

....duct tape an empty beer can or half eaten sammich.


Try as many of these as you can, they are all either FUNNY or related to VIOLENCE/ALCOHOL, I imagine that peaks her interest.

DO NOT EVER TRY AND DUCT TAPE DUCT TAPE, BAD THINGS WILL HAPPEN.

>>27199
Do both.
Sure a MONSTROUS SANDWICH and then some variation of the VERMONSTER will assuage his appetite.
Although we should get some kind of magic upgrades for people, just for the hell of it.
Suggestions: Hope getting some kind of Sanctuary effect, Reka getting some kind of toughness booster, etc.

Also seconding the Pey'j idea.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)21:49 No. 27381 ID: cd08c0
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>>27320
> Reka
Who's Reka? That sounds like a DUMB name.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/10(Mon)21:49 No. 27382 ID: cd08c0
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>>27201
> Give Mox Wand to George
Sure, why not, Kara can always yell at him to use it later, if she wants.
George doesn't look like he has a clue, but then neither do the scientists.
He'll surely get the hang of it. Just like the Pistol.

> Give Cat Lotion to Lance
Uh. Okay. His reaction is... interesting.

> Give Boost Boots to Prevous. And your name is Pey'j now.
Prevous appreciates anything that means he doesn't have to work as hard!
He... doesn't seem to get the joke, however.


>>27292
> EXPERIMENT
AND WHY THE HELL NOT
... through offscreen trial and error, Kara manages to deduce that duct taping an empty beer can will not refill it with beer. It will, however, fix any holes in the beer can.
Duct taping a spent bullet doesn't do anything. If she finds both the casing and the bullet, she can reattach them, but the charge has already been spent, so she just ends up with a very bullet-like hunk of useless metal.
Kara doesn't have a sammich handy, but Jay says you could probably duct tape a sammich together after you cut it in half. You would end up with duct tape residue on your sammich, though.
Altogether this means that while it does repair shit, you need all the bits that broke first. Or at least most of them. It's basically reattaching stuff, good as new. Sortof like duct tape.


> DUCT TAPE THE TRUCK
A brilliant idea! Except there's not nearly enough duct tape for that. It wouldn't act as armor, either, because anything that breaks through to hurt the truck would also destroy the duct tape.


>>27320
> Magical Enhancement?!
Hope says she'd be happy to get some kind of shield effect, if you want to do that.

Jay says that while it's possible to enchant body parts and people, he feels he has to remind everyone that they're still learning how to do this, and it could have unforseen consequences.
Just recently, for instance, one of his coworkers was accidently turned into a frog.

>>27382
Try to figure out a trouble spot on the way to food to test the new stuff out.
Well, all the new stuff but that cat lotion.
*shudder*

>>27382
So we can't even duct tape the tires? Oh well.
Let's try some horribly twisted experiments instead!

Duct tape a BLT and a club sandwich together!
Duct tape zombie arms to Kara so she can dual-wield shotguns!
Put a drop of cat lotion on it to make a feline abomination!

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/11(Tue)03:09 No. 27531 ID: cd08c0
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>>27511
> So we can't even duct tape the tires?
We could, if we could find enough rubber strips to make a whole tire. It would be easier to just buy new tires with our new SHITLOAD OF MONEY, though.

> Duct tape a BLT and a club sandwich together!
Kara, still lacking a sandwich, tests that theory on two different empty beer cans.
Apparently that works. But only if there's an obvious 'break', a point for the two to connect.
But it otherwise works.

> Duct tape zombie arms to Kara so she can dual-wield shotguns!
The duct tape doesn't work on living objects! And last time Kara checked, she was alive.
It would probably work if Kara were DEAD, but Kara isn't nearly drunk enough to try that.
... Kara isn't really sure what zombies count as, but seeing as they tend to kill indiscriminantly, she doesn't really want to try giving them multiple arms and teeth.

> Put a drop of cat lotion on it to make a feline abomination!
We'd just end up with a bunch of cats stuck to duct tape. Which is funny, but hardly an abomination.
Besides, Lance is being creepy and obsessive about the lotion right now.


... why did we come here again?
... Money and guns. Right.

Jay says the safest enchantments are 'enhancements', which are pretty much exactly what they sound like. Making something do what it already does, but better.
So we could make a gun that shoots fire, or a shirt that works like armor.
Or duct tape that connects things, or shoes that help you move.

He can enchant their bodies directly, such as giving Kara increased strength or Prevous a greater ability to... eat?
But it's like this:
If using a magic gun turns out to have unforseen side effects, you can stop using the gun. You can't really do that with your skin.

So, were we going to buy anything? Or should we just go buy Prevous his sandwich?

How about enchanting the truck? Say, to regrow tires?

Suggestion 2009/08/11(Tue)04:12 No. 27546 ID: c06332
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>>27531
Get some enchantments for your shotgun at least.
Flaming bullets blessed by Mexican Jesus himself.

>>27531
How about some enchantment on the shotgun that enhances the mass, volume and velocity of the shot upon exiting the barrel?

As in, pull the trigger, and somehow you have a cloud of inch diameter shot flying at your foe.

Could use it not just for killing, but for un times with excessive property damage!

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/11(Tue)19:55 No. 28058 ID: cd08c0
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>>27546 >>27581
> Flaming bullets blessed by Mexican Jesus
> Mass + Velocity + Volume = Fucking Ouch
Either of these are workable. In fact, Jay can give Kara BOTH, at the cost of two enchantments and a slight increase for complexity. Should come to about $9500, or $4250 for one.
Except Mexican Jesus. Jay doesn't have access to him. And doesn't even know where to find him. In fact, if Kara finds Mexican Jesus, Jay would be really interested in scanning him.

>>27537
> Regrowing tires?
Unfortunately, Ignometics hasn't perfected the art of actually growing or regenerating objects yet. Incidently, you should probably try not to lose a limb or something.
He could, however, enchant the truck's tires to be more resiliant, which would keep them from ever blowing again, barring a nuclear holocaust.
Actually, the exact description he gives is something more like "enhancing the natural springyness of the rubber to allow most attacks to bounce off." But Kara's sure that wouldn't change anything.
Jay says it'll cost $4000, and they'll throw in the tires for free.

Hmm. Well, we have $19520. For $9500, we can have a shotgun of FLAMING DEATH.

The tires, though? Nah, save our money for something greater and just buy a big load of spares.

Buy FLAMING and VOLUME upgrades for shotgun. Try to avoid the sexual undertones of this upgrade.

Mass bullets are cooler than flaming ones, honestly. I'd say go with that and tires. Tires could be very very important.

just MASS. until we find enough other magical thingers, let's go with just that.
also, since enchanting stuff costs monies, get Hope to heal someone under observation in exchange for making her dress explosion and bullet proof.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/11(Tue)22:50 No. 28222 ID: cd08c0
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>>27546 >>27581 >>28069 >>28071 >>28099
> FLAMING DEATH
Kara likes power! The more the better. After payment of $9500, Kara's SHOTGUN is upgraded.
It now shoots big fucking blasts of flaming shrapnel and death.

>>28099
> get Hope to heal someone in exchange for making her dress explosion and bullet proof.
Hope practically jumps at the chance to be less squishy.
After expenses of Hope's new BLASTPROOF DRESS, Kara still recieves $1500 for the study of Hope's healing ability.

After including the $2000 Kara got for taking the test items, Kara now has a total of $13520.

>>28069
> The tires, though? Nah, save our money for something greater and just buy a big load of spares.
True, tires can be bought for around $80 each. We can probably afford to buy twenty.

OKAY, WE SHOULD BE DONE HERE.
WHERE SHOULD WE GO NEXT.

>>28222
feed PEY'J, reward GEORGE!

Stuff Prevous' pie hole, naturally. We've got the money.

Also buy George something sugary. Nothing could go wrong with that.

>>28222

Deliver FLAMING DEATH to MIBs.

Drink the Cat Lotion. Rub it all over yourself. Become the lord and master of cats.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)00:41 No. 28323 ID: cd08c0
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>>28226 >>28273
> FEED PEY'J, REWARD GEORGE
Prevous still doesn't get the joke.

Kara decides to go back to the Seven Deadly Sammiches. Icecream is for desert, anyway!
... Prevous says they might be able to get some desert there, anyway, if they ask the right way.

On the way out, Lance suddenly starts asking if we have access to a woodchipper.
The way he's waving that lotion around is highly disconcerting.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)02:06 No. 28384 ID: cd08c0
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> Ignore Lance
Lance is fucking creepy.

SO HERE WE ARE AT THE SEVEN SAMMICHES.

The cashier starts yelling at Prevous as soon as he enters the store.
This is JESLYN, Prevous's sister, and she kicked his ass out last week for eating the entire fucking inventory. Furthermore, the only way she's serving Prevous is if he pays his back tab, which comes to $500 dollars, and is surely far more money than he has on him.

> Reward George
Prevous, showing initiative, asks Jeslyn if she has any icecream.
Jeslyn says she has a lot of things, including a stash of icecream that he'll never get his hands on, unless he has some money.


>>28277
> Deliver FLAMING DEATH to MIBs.
That's the plan, as soon Prevous gets his damn food.

>>28297
> Become the lord and master of cats.
... Lance is looking at the lotion rather oddly, now.

>>28384
500 bux doesn't seem like much of a dent in our funds.

>>28384
FOOD UP.

>>28384
As a reward for Prevous' help, pay them an EXTRA 500$ for the next time Prevous binges.

Next time you can, go back to magic shiz place and ask to enchant prevous to make him 5x lighter, so he's an easier shield to carry.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)02:59 No. 28407 ID: cd08c0
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>>28386 >>28387
> 500 bux doesn't seem like much of a dent in our funds. FOOD UP.
Jeslyn changes her tune very quickly.

>>28391
> As a reward for Prevous' help, pay them an EXTRA 500$ for the next time Prevous binges.
In fact, Jeslyn declares Kara her BEST FRIEND FOREVER.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)03:00 No. 28410 ID: cd08c0
File 125007125445.gif - (6.77KB , 400x400 , 164.gif )

> SAMMICHES AND ICECREAM
George and Prevous are HAPPILLY given their sandwiches. And icecream. And Jeslyn is sure to mention, repeatedly, that if there's anything else Kara needs, she'll gladly sell to her.
In total, Prevous' meal, George's icecream, and then Prevous' icecream comes to $420. Which is still nothing compared to Kara's SHITLOAD OF CASH. Everyone is filled up on sammiches and icecream.
Except Lance, who apparently fills up on something else.
Kara has $12100.

> SIDEQUEST COMPLETED: FEED PREVOUS
Prevous is now 100% loyal and ready to fuck shit up. What's next?!

Murder some MIBS. Lets roll.

>>28410
>And Jeslyn is sure to mention, repeatedly, that if there's anything else Kara needs, she'll gladly sell to her.
How much for a threesome with George?

Hug George and tell him you love him. For a newlywed couple, you two haven't been very amorous.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)16:28 No. 28752 ID: cd08c0
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>>28484
> Hug George and tell him you love him.
He is a cutie~ Even if he can't talk.

>>28429
> How much for a threesome with George?
"$5000, and I'll do anything you want me to."
Funny, they're not... usually this receptive.


... Kara hears some sort of rumbling outside.

>>28752
Apologize about the doors ahead of time and launch a salvo from our new FIRE SHOTTY through the fragile glass, adding EVEN MORE shrapnel to it.

>>28752
Cradle George in your left arm and start shooting at the MiBs. Aliens style.
Maybe go for some cover if you can be bothered to.

>>28752
Yell "NOT NOW, WE'RE BUSY! DON'T YOU NEED A WARRANT OR SOME STUPID SHIT LIKE THAT?"

>>28752
Ask if the phone has recently been used.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)17:44 No. 28784 ID: cd08c0
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>>28754
> Apologize about the doors ahead of time
What? Why-- OH GOD DAMNIT

> launch a salvo from our new FIRE SHOTTY through the fragile glass
The kickback on this thing is INSANE. Kara's shot goes a little high, but she still manages to completely obliterate one of the agents, thanks to pure destructive area.
It'll probably take awhile to get the hang of this.

>>28756
> "NOT NOW, WE'RE BUSY! DON'T YOU NEED A WARRANT OR SOME STUPID SHIT LIKE THAT?"

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)17:47 No. 28787 ID: cd08c0
File 125012446751.gif - (6.99KB , 400x400 , 167.gif )

"Lady, we MAKE the warrants."


Huh. That's a new type of agent. Kara doesn't think she's seen any like--

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)17:48 No. 28788 ID: cd08c0
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CRAP.

>>28788
Who bombed the bombers?

>>28788
Become used to the shotgun by using it repeatedly.
Apologise for shop.

>>28788
Toss George to safety.
Rally your party.
And commence to FUCKIN' SHIT UP.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)19:06 No. 28813 ID: cd08c0
File 125012919373.gif - (4.64KB , 400x400 , 169.gif )

... Ow.

>>28789
> Explosions?
The Scrubbers -- the big burly guys with grenade launchers -- just fired on us. The store is now missing most of its front wall.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)19:07 No. 28814 ID: cd08c0
File 125012922841.gif - (6.31KB , 400x400 , 170.gif )

>>28793
> Toss George to safety.
George runs to take cover behind the cashier's counter. He should be safe.

> Rally your party.
That IS why we recruited these losers, right?
Prevous and Lance leap into the fray!

>>28790 >>28793
> USE SHOTGUN REPEATEDLY TO FUCK SHIT UP
This isn't working! Firing continuously just makes the recoil worse!

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)19:10 No. 28818 ID: cd08c0
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PREVOUS IS FIRED ON! OH GOD NOT PEY'J

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)19:12 No. 28820 ID: cd08c0
File 125012952350.gif - (6.77KB , 400x400 , 172.gif )

... oh, okay then.

... the rumbling from before is getting louder.

>>28814
Then kick them to death with your face.
And shoot them at a closer range.

Hit that sweeper next to you with the butt of your shotgun. He doesn't even deserve the bullet. Then keep mowing down mofos.

Tell Lance that they're all hiding cats from him.

>This isn't working! Firing continuously just makes the recoil worse!
New strategy: Don't fire unless you are right next to what you want dead.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)20:48 No. 28850 ID: cd08c0
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>>28822
> KICK THEM WITH YOUR FACE
That's using your head!

The supervisor in the back is yelling orders.
"SHOOT SIGURD. SHE'S THE TARGET! SHOOT SIGURD."

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)20:48 No. 28851 ID: cd08c0
File 125013533497.gif - (5.28KB , 400x400 , 174.gif )

>>28828
> "LANCE. THEY HAVE CATS."
... huh. That.. that seemed to do something.

Taking a moment to keep her gun steady, Kara takes out the nearest Sweeper at close range. There is very little left of him.

... that rumbling is really deafening now. What the hell--

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)20:50 No. 28853 ID: cd08c0
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WHAT THE HELL.




> Kara canceled fight: Interrupted by cats.

>>28853
Throw Lance among them, tell them to WELCOME THEIR NEW KING.
Continue shooting after that, but only the mooks.

Say "Oh no! A big pile of targets clustered together! Why I'd need some kind of crazy high-powered shotgun t-HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Then turn the cats to chunky salsa with your shotty.

>>28853
I'd say the lotion is a AMAZING SUCCESS.

>>28863
Well, I doubt he was supposed to drink it...

>>28858
Do you really want to do that where Lance can see you?
Killing hirelings is bad for business.

Use remaining lotion as a vaginal douche later.

Is that rudy?

>>28868

And Tom

>>28866
So you can have pussies in your...

I love this board. I know I do. Otherwise I'd leave.

>>28853
Mental note:

New shotgun fun, but kick makes it harder to kill things or cause property destruction where you want it to be.

Get an anti-recoil enchantment on it later. Then it will be even more fun.

>anti-recoil enchantment

Bob you are a motherfucking genius.

Suggestion 2009/08/12(Wed)22:00 No. 28890 ID: 9a71e2
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>>28880

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)22:22 No. 28897 ID: cd08c0
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>>28863
> I'd say the lotion is a AMAZING SUCCESS.
Yes. Yes it is.

>>28857
> Throw Lance among them, tell them to WELCOME THEIR NEW KING.
Lance is firing wildly into the horde.
"KARA! KARA SAVE ME! THE CATS ARE EVIL KARA SAVE ME SAVE ME SHOOT THE CATS WHAT ARE YOU --"

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)22:23 No. 28899 ID: cd08c0
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> Ignore Lance
> Lance is fucking creepy.

There is a cacophonous "NYA~~!!"
And Lance disappears within the horde of cats.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)22:24 No. 28900 ID: cd08c0
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> Continue shooting, but only the mooks.
Before Kara does that, she'd really like to GET OUT OF THE WAY.
The horde of cats presses onward, brutally crushing everything in its path.
Kara dives to the side before she's swept away.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)22:24 No. 28901 ID: cd08c0
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...

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)22:24 No. 28902 ID: cd08c0
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Kara has no idea what just happened.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/12(Wed)22:25 No. 28903 ID: cd08c0
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All that's left is the Scrubber and his supervisor. The Scrubber is still heavilly wounded from the fight before, but the Supervisor managed to escape by pressing up against the buildings, and is completely unharmed.
All the other MIBs were swept away.

Prevous was trampled directly by the horde, but is inexplicable still here and conscious.
Barely.
Lance is nowhere to be seen.

>>28903
OPEN FIRE at the point exactly between the supervisor and his lackey.

>>28903
Shotgun the scrubber, threaten the supervisor at gunpoint, and Rekaens I love you.

>>28903

Obliterate the Scrubber, toss Prevous to safety, then threaten the Supervisor.

Wipe out the scrubber, threaten Supervisor, ask Hope to dispense healing.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)00:04 No. 28933 ID: cd08c0
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>>28918
> toss Prevous
You... you're serious? Prevous just survived a giant sweeping cat horde of death, and remained stationary through it, with what Kara can only assume is pure fat, mass, and determination.
There is no fucking way.

>>28907 >>28918
> Obliterate the Scrubber
That Kara can do. She'll just take her shotgun and -- GOD DAMN RECOIL.

>>28885
> Get an anti-recoil enchantment
That sounds like a REALLY GOOD IDEA.

Kara's badly injured. She can barely hold onto this thing, let alone aim it properly.
Even as tough as she is, she won't last much longer. That Scrubber is aiming at her. She'll have to...

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)00:05 No. 28934 ID: cd08c0
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... Prevous!
With a mighty battle cry, Prevous leaps on the Scrubber!
"BEEEEEEF!"

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)00:05 No. 28935 ID: cd08c0
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>>28907 >>28918
>> threaten the Supervisor
... right.

...
"You think I'm just another Sweeper, don't you, Miss Sigurd. I don't even have a gun.
But I didn't climb to the highest rank of the MIB for nothing."

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)00:06 No. 28936 ID: cd08c0
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"Alright, Miss Sigurd. Let's see what you can do."

Give him the finger.

>>28936

Didn't we get a free magic detector earlier?

Put it to use on this fucker, shortly before attempting to kill him with flaming death.

>>28936
Ignore his taunts and shoot him. He's just trying to intimidate you.

>>28936
Shoot around his feet.

Totally make out with him.

He wont see it coming. Promise.

>>28935
"So just how did you get to the highest rank of the MIB?"
He's a high-ranking villian, he should have at least a small exposition compulsion. Maybe we can find out his weakness.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)01:18 No. 28949 ID: cd08c0
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>>28937
> Give him the finger.
Happily.

>>28938
> Didn't we get a magic detector?
We did. It says this guy is radiating about five point seven thaums a second, whatever the hell that means.

>>28938 >>28939
> Shoot this fucker.
Unfortunately, he's fast enough to dodge, at least for as long as Kara's suffering from recoil. She does, however, manage to blow a crater in the wall behind him, raining shrapnel down on him.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)01:18 No. 28950 ID: cd08c0
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>>28944
> "So just how did you get to the highest rank of the MIB?"
"Devotion."


OW GOD IT'S LIKE A THOUSAND HANGOVERS AT ONCE.

>>28950
DOWN THAT SUPERCOFFEE.

DRINK THE FUCKING SUPER COFFEE OH GOD

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)03:19 No. 28965 ID: cd08c0
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>>28951 >>28952
> drink coffee
The... the coffee? Kara had almost forgotten about it.
This isn't like a normal hangover. She was just using that as an analog, you know?
She's completely sober now. Besides, the last time she drank it...
But... but...

"Well, Miss Sigurd, I must say I'm disappointed. I honestly expected you to put up a better fight than this.
But if this is all you can manage, I suppose I won't hesitate. Your little quest is about to end."

...

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)03:24 No. 28970 ID: cd08c0
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> why not



> animated

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)03:24 No. 28971 ID: cd08c0
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i can feel pain
but it is a different kind of pain
it is not pain but PAIN
within that pain is clarity

i have drunk away my sorrows
but i am drunk no longer
i am the opposite of drunk

i can see things as they truly are



SIGURD is here. She is injured, but those injuries will not hinder her will to fight.
There is a SNAKE here. He is not a dragon, but merely a snake.
There is a DORF here. He was Sigurd's ally. He has fallen in glorious battle.
Sigurd's SWORD is here, discarded beside her.

It is because of the SNAKE that she is injured. It is because of the SNAKE that her comrade has fallen.
He is saying something, but it is of no consequence.
He is not a dragon, but merely a snake.
Sigurd wishes for vengance.

Instruct her how.

>>28971
Grab the sword and CUT UP THAT SNAKE

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)03:49 No. 28976 ID: cd08c0
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>>28973
> take your sword
of course. GRAM has never let me down
i shall use it in rightous vengance

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)03:51 No. 28977 ID: cd08c0
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> vengance
with a mighty roar, GRAM unleashes its fury
its power makes it unwieldy, but it is no problem for one such as i

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)03:51 No. 28978 ID: cd08c0
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it is attempting to strike at me now, with sneaky tricks and mental games
how cute

it will not work on one as devoted as i
how shall i dispatch the snake?

>>28978
SLICE ITS ARMS OFF AND RIP OUT ITS SKULL.

Blast him!

>>28978
Crush it beneath your heel.

>>28983
Actually, scratch that, cut out it's heart and eat it.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)04:39 No. 28987 ID: cd08c0
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>>28981
> blast him
simplistic but effective

>>28980
> slice his arms off
one arm is already severed
the other comes shortly

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)04:40 No. 28988 ID: cd08c0
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>>28980
> rip out his skull
it attempts to fight as i claim my prize
but is no match

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)04:40 No. 28989 ID: cd08c0
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> vengeance
for my name is sigurd
the ultimate warrior

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)04:40 No. 28990 ID: cd08c0
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i grow weary now
... i think...
... i shall...
.....rest.....

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)04:41 No. 28991 ID: cd08c0
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Kara Sigurd has passed out.

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)04:41 No. 28992 ID: cd08c0
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End Chapter Three.

>>28991
No! I must kill the MiBs!
No. You are the MiBs.
And then Kara was a vampaia.

>And then Kara was a vampaia.

You sure that's Kara? Because Kara just collapsed.

I think that's Hope.

So...

Kara likes to booze or she gets angry.

When fully sobered by coffee, calls herself Sigurd, acts in accordance with Norse mythology.

Is taller, stronger and more durable than a normal human would be.

The suits call her Sigurd, and seem to have special orders regarding her.

Lives in a world with magic.

So, Kara seems to be a Valkyrie (maybe an Einherjar) that is purposefully staying drunk constantly to forget something that is still a source of rage.

>So, Kara seems to be a Valkyrie (maybe an Einherjar) that is purposefully staying drunk constantly to forget something that is still a source of rage.

Ladies and gentlemen! Our first epileptic tree!

I'm so proud. *Sniff*

>>28971
SHIT JUST GOT KNURD.

>>29020

It's an interesting theory. Not SO out there. The Sigurd thing is weird, and she does use terms like "glorious battle" and calls Prevous a dorf and so on. Maybe not a Valkyrie perse, but I wouldn't be surprised if Kara's not exactly human.

>>29014
Or could be, if she'd get off the sauce.
Alternately, something like Shadowrun goblinisation?

>>28991

Is that a fucking Barbed Wheel?

Goddammit.

>>29172
Wait- what are you-
Fuck.
I WAS RIGHT
EVERY SINGLE QUEST ON THIS SITE IS SECRETLY RUN BY WEAVER
I'M NOT CRAZY
IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)17:24 No. 29223 ID: cd08c0
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...

Rekaens!zCiuXQBmHU 2009/08/13(Thu)17:24 No. 29225 ID: cd08c0
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...

>>29172

It's not the first one.

>>29193
Not quite.
Weaver has power over anyone who uses the Orb of Infinite Psyche as a plot device. Using [technobabble] metafictional [technobabble technobabble memes] he can reach through the fourth wall to control them, or drain their psyche. I haven't been able to uncover his plans yet, but I'm sure they're sinister.

I hope this message reaches you in time - Weaver knows I'm on to him, and his servants are everywhere.
Remember, >>29193, you are the chosen one. Only you can destroy the true Orb!