tippler 2021/08/24(Tue)19:14 No. 1008687 ID: eedbeb
File 162985766208.png - (259.47KB , 1000x1100 , p1.png )

“Ah…”

Ahpin leans back on the bed as Maddie takes him down to the base of his dick. He’s sitting in his bedroom after a pleasant dinner and movie date, his canine girlfriend between his knees.

She starts bobbing her head and Ahpin gets a grip on her long hair.

tippler 2021/08/24(Tue)19:14 No. 1008688 ID: eedbeb
File 162985768050.png - (199.16KB , 1000x1100 , p2.png )

After a few minutes of the blowjob, he tugs her free.

“Gonna cum already?” Maddie teases, voice hoarse. She drags a finger up his spit slicked member.

“Hey that’s a sign you’re doing a good job.” Ahpin grins and scratches his ear. “Actually, I was wondering if you could answer a question, uh, I hope this isn’t cheesy, but what does sex mean to you?”

Pleasure for me, and my partner.

"Well, sex is sex. It means many things to a lot of people... but me? To me, sex is just something I enjoy. That's not to say I'll do it with just anybody, but if it's a partner I can feel good with, and I can make that partner feel good in turn, that's all I need."

Sex is an art. You express affection with it, explore bodies with it, create beauty and pleasure with it.

Sex means I've got a high enough gamer score to impress the dudes with my sick moves. Such as this 180 nip slip

The simplest way to connect with others

Sex is about pleasure and fun you guess. Sometimes its about getting off on pleasing the other person too. *then give a minor complaint about how guys never give head in return nearly as long*

(cool premise to have you control others only when the protag is with them, that's gonna be neat) (Also as the guy who writes CATALYST im mega hyped, gl)

If we really want to oversimplify, sex is one of the most intimate ways to have fun with someone else.

It's not the fact that I'm gobbling down a hot dog that's important. Everyone does that.
It's who's hotdog I decide to gobble that's meaningful.

I want to breed a horde, to conquer the steppes and restore my rightful throne.

Seconding the horde idea. Let's conquer the world.

>>1008712
I would revoke my original suggest, but I want to use this one for at least one person Aphin meets in the future because boy howdy would this be an amazing plot element haha.

tippler 2021/08/25(Wed)16:11 No. 1008732 ID: eedbeb
File 162993308035.png - (217.20KB , 1000x1100 , p3.png )

“Huh.” Maddie sits back and stretches her legs. “I mean, sex is fun, it’s pleasurable, it’s a way to connect with people I care about.”

Ahpin nods. “That makes sense.”

“Also forming a stable polycule is the easiest way to get a dungeon team.”

“Uh. I never really thought of it that way.”

“Apparently lots of famous adventuring parties are banging.” Maddie starts listing off teams. “The Guardians, the Awakened, that one group of sexy slimegirls…”

Ahpin shrugs helplessly.

tippler 2021/08/25(Wed)16:11 No. 1008733 ID: eedbeb
File 162993309284.png - (170.37KB , 1000x1100 , p4.png )

“Don’t worry about it man.” Maddie yawns and pats Ahpin’s foot with her paw. “I know you worry about me when I’m off leveling up my sick skills, but I got it under control.”

Should Maddie:
-Ask Ahpin to fuck her
-Ask Ahpin what he thinks about sex
-Finish the blowjob

B, so he can use the horde line.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT SEX AHPIN

Tell Aphin to think about sex.

Ask him what he's thinking about, he looks uncomfortable

Just ask him to fuck you.

ASK HIM ABOUT SEX HE SEEMS UNCOMFORTABLE

B, so he can use the horde line, unironically.

B - "turnabout is fair play" - though I don't think we can influence his response.

B, but when he tries to answer, finish blowjob.

Roll to gag via uncontrollable giggling at his inevitable failing lexical coherence.

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)10:39 No. 1008771 ID: eedbeb
File 162999959306.png - (154.18KB , 1000x1100 , p5.png )

“What about you?” Maddie asks.

Ahpin sighs and gestures to Maddie to join him on the bed. They lie side by side.

“Sex is enjoyable and I love spending time with you, but I feel kind of inadequate when I hear your stories about your other partners. Not that I think you should stop seeing them or anything.” Ahpin adds hurriedly. “I’m just worried I’m boring, like, you told me you met this guy who wanted to breed an army to reclaim his rightful throne. That’s kind of insane to someone like me.”

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)10:40 No. 1008772 ID: eedbeb
File 162999960289.png - (280.83KB , 1000x1100 , p6.png )

Maddie takes Ahpin’s hand and puts it on her boob in a comforting way.

“Babe, you’re fine. Life isn’t all orgies and adventure. Sometimes it’s nice to have something chill.”

Ahpin kisses Maddie’s snout. “Can we just cuddle tonight?”

“Sure.” Maddie slings an arm around Ahpin’s shoulder.

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)10:40 No. 1008773 ID: eedbeb
File 162999960910.png - (200.77KB , 1000x1100 , p7.png )

Ahpin wakes up to his alarm the next morning and carefully slides out of bed where Maddie is still snoozing. He takes a moment to appreciate his girlfriend before rubbing his eyes and heading to the bathroom.

What is Ahpin’s morning routine before going to the office?

jerk off while taking a shit

>>1008773
Do some morning physical exercises, then shower and do misc hygeine stuff, brush hair and fur while using blow-dryer, including a mild leave-in product, then dress and have a cup of coffee and some nutritious breakfast while catching up on news.

>>1008773
Brush teeth, shower, wank.
Get dressed, grab something to eat, leave a note for Maddie.
Hit the road.

Brush teeth, shower, try not to think about the crushing void you feel inside of you at all times that refuses to go away

Morning dabbing practice.

>>1008774
Nooooooope. You're not the type to mix pleasure and relief like that - you make a point of never doing it on the toilet, in fact. You heard once how/why some people ended up being into that... and you'd honestly be a happier person if you didn't know.

Whacking in the shower's fair game, though. Don't forget to brush your teeth!

Text your sister Uzak on your COMM. See how she is doing. Dont expect a detailed response, she's the quiet type.

Also go shirtless today.

>>1008786
I support this.

Coffee, breakfast, brush your teeth, get dressed and read video-game forums while you wait for it to be time to leave. Don't check the news, that should wait until you get home and can properly de-stress about it afterwards.

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)14:42 No. 1008791 ID: eedbeb
File 163001417101.png - (227.58KB , 1000x1100 , p8.png )

Ahpin makes a mug of instant coffee, peels a hard boiled egg, and toasts a cinnamon purple bagel. After breakfast he brushes his teeth, jacks off in the shower, and leaves a hand drawn heart on a slip of paper next to Maddie’s pillow. While watching his girl snooze, he dabs for the extreme hype.

The nearest portal gate is two blocks from his condo. Paper sack of lunch in hand, Ahpin takes the magic tunnel to the station closest to his office building.

He greets the receptionist at the front desk and ascends to his floor.

Cepha, his coworker in the finance department, is fretting in front of the printer.

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)14:43 No. 1008792 ID: eedbeb
File 163001421383.png - (222.69KB , 1000x1100 , p9.png )

“Something wrong?” Ahpin asks.

“Fairies got into the mana wells.” Cepha’s mouth tentacles flutter with distress. “I have to print a report with security runes but I don’t know how to remove the sprites without damaging the machine.”

Does Cepha:
-Call a (sexy) exorcist team
-Call the (less sexy) company tech support
-Other

Call a sexy exorcist to cast out the printer demons.

>>1008792
Say you’ve done it dozens of times before and can fix it. In reality you’ve done it 5 times, succeeding 3/5 of those times. You think that’s good enough odds that your boss might actually like you a bit more by doing it. And Cepha might think you’re an okay dude.

Correct procedure is to call tech support first, since that's in-house. If they need an exorcist team they'll outsource it.

Bribe them out of the printer with something even more tempting! Like contracts with poorly worded non-mutual indemnification clauses allowing assignment without review.

Ahpin has described himself as "boring", which makes me think he'll call tech-support about the issue and let them handle it.

>>1008792
Got any roach foggers? Could handle this yourself.

Ask what the fuck “PC LOAD LETTER” means and call the sexy peeps in

Go to the mana well, point at the fairies, and call out to them yelling "Hey! Stop that!"

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)20:21 No. 1008810 ID: eedbeb
File 163003446505.png - (202.10KB , 1000x1100 , p10.png )

“I think I’m going to call a local magic squad for help.” Cepha says slowly.

“Can’t you ask IT? I know they’re not as experienced with magic but they recently hired a kobold for phishing spells.”

“No.” Cepha seems to steel herself and starts tapping at her phone. “This’ll be faster and I can charge it to the company.”

Ahpin forces a smile and heads to his cubicle.

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)20:21 No. 1008811 ID: eedbeb
File 163003447273.png - (317.99KB , 1000x1100 , p11.png )

He boots up his computer, checks his email, and is part way through a follow-up with R&D when the office door slams open.

Three strangers in matching nun outfits storm towards where Cepha is waiting by the printer. The leader, a shark girl, is trailed by a chinchilla and a cackling eldritch.

“We’re Nun’ya Business, nice to meet ya ma’am.” The shark sticks out her hand and Cepha shakes it, a blush starting on the cuttlefish’s cheeks. “Ya said you’re having a sprite problem?”

“Yes, I’m very grateful for your help.” Cepha says.

tippler 2021/08/26(Thu)20:21 No. 1008812 ID: eedbeb
File 163003447899.png - (190.72KB , 1000x1100 , p12.png )

Ahpin hunkers down at his desk and tries to ignore the flashes of light and wet smacking sounds coming from the opposite side of his thin cube wall.

“Those sprites won’t bother you anymore.” the shark says. The printer hums and starts to spit out pages.

“Oh thank you.” Cepha titters. “I’m glad my saviors were so skilled.”

“That’s not the only thing we’re skilled at.” the shark purrs.

Ahpin lets his head fall to his desk with a thud, which unfortunately doesn’t muffle the sounds of cheap nun costumes being unzipped.

shark whips out her peepee while chinchilla queens cepha. the eldritch likes to watch

Shark girl (devoid of dick) reveals second layer of costume underneath: sexy office worker, uses disguise to avail herself of the coffee maker.
Eldritch: photocopy eldritch bum on machine to test it works now.

Chinchilla: recite a prayer to the goddess in thanks for this blessed squirt

Shark reveals she traded dicks with the Eldritch on a dare, Chinchilla blushes profusely but makes intensely detailed lewd sketches for her 'report'.

The costumes unzip to reveal that it was the IT department this whole time. What you expected them to have sex? In this SEX quest?

Cepha leads Nun'ya Business off to a side room before things get too heavy.

tippler 2021/08/27(Fri)10:28 No. 1008856 ID: eedbeb
File 163008531803.png - (176.92KB , 1000x1100 , p13.png )

Cepha leads the shark girl and the chinchilla to a nearby meeting room that at least has a door and walls that go to the ceiling. Ahpin peeks above his cubicle to make sure they’ve gone, and puts in a pair of earbuds to drown out the moaning and recited prayers.

He feels a cold prickle up his neck and he whips around in his office chair to see the eldritch in fishnets. It chitters hysterically when he practically falls out of his seat.

“Yes? Can I help you?” Ahpin says, annoyed.

tippler 2021/08/27(Fri)10:28 No. 1008857 ID: eedbeb
File 163008532790.png - (179.30KB , 1000x1100 , p14.png )

The eldritch snickers. “You don’t wanna join them?”

“Nope, I have a girlfriend. What about you? What’s your name?”

“I’m Bob. I like to watch sometimes but I’m more here for the tasty snacks.” The eldritch grins and Ahpin notes the fairy dust on its teeth.

tippler 2021/08/27(Fri)10:29 No. 1008858 ID: eedbeb
File 163008534498.png - (176.59KB , 1000x1100 , p15.png )

Ahpin takes a moment to recall the fae development track. Stray spell particles and spirit refuse form MOTES, which can clump together to manifest a SPRITE. A sprite seeks high value sources of mana and morphs into a CHANGELING, a shapeshifter which resembles a child and is generally considered sentient.

Changelings incubate in an egg and emerge as one of three forms: ELF, SPIRIT, or ELDRITCH.

Does Bob:
-Tell Ahpin a dire prophecy of the end of the world to fuck with him
-Tell Ahpin that Maddie is in danger to fuck with him
-Steal the cat’s office supplies

wonder aloud if his girlfriend is more adventurous than him. appropriate office supplies

Tell him his girlfriend is in danger, then when he's distracted steal as many pens as you can pocket

>>1008858
Why not all three?

2 and 3, and maybe hint at 1 for the extra spook factor. It’s easiest to steal office supplies while the cat is panicking

Tell him you can mix a love potion using printer ink and all of his paper clips.

>>1008858
Say Maddie's in danger.
I mean she's an adventurer so it's usually true but what if Bob isn't just trolling and it's like super serious business, what then Ahpin!?

Tell him Maddie is in danger, but I feel like Aphin's gone through this so many times that he doesent panic

Steal his office supplies while warning him of a dire prophecy to mess with him.

tippler 2021/08/27(Fri)16:51 No. 1008874 ID: eedbeb
File 163010830814.png - (233.02KB , 1000x1100 , p16.png )

“Wait…” Bob steps closer. “Shirtless cat, blue clothes, huge nerd, you must be Maddie’s boyfriend! I love her team, heard they’re at the Ultimate Annihilation Dungeon today getting some rare loot. Real risky place, lots of elementals.”

Bob leans forward, boxing Ahpin in. The cat isn’t particularly impressed.

“I’m not particularly impressed.” Ahpin says. “Maddie can handle herself.”

Ahpin notices Bob’s slipped its arm around the chair and is taking things off his desk.

“Stop that!”

tippler 2021/08/27(Fri)16:51 No. 1008875 ID: eedbeb
File 163010831828.png - (265.01KB , 1000x1100 , p17.png )

“Look over there! An apocalypse scenario where all the mana producing vents in the ocean shut!” Bob says, pointing wildly with one tendril and stuffing pens and paperclips into its robe with the other.

“I’m not an adventurer, that won’t work on me.” Ahpin seizes Bob by the armpits and lifts the creature bodily out of his cubicle. “Go away or I’ll leave a bad review on your team.”

Bob scurries away with its stolen loot and Ahpin sits back at his desk, turns his music up, and focuses on paperwork. For a company that makes magic washing machines, he sure has to do a lot of risk management.

Become taken aback by the unabashed faith of the nuns and become a practicing *rolls dice* Zoroastrian.

So you're like a comtingency planner / legalese warning label writer? You should take stock of what he nabbed. I bet he got your stapler. You'll have to go to logistics for a new one

After all that nonsense, let's make that bacon.
GET TO WORK!

What are we listening to today? A song about sex or a song about sex but via subtle innuendo?

>>1008877
This, but just take whatever you lost from Cepha's desk instead. S'what he gets for breaking procedure to bring these people in the first place.

>>1008889
"This isn't working" indeed.
Do your job and then build a system that does some of your job.

Since your company makes washing machines, there is bound to be one around here you can use.

Might as well throw the nuns' clothing thay they left behind in a washer to clean them up for them as thanks. Though they're going to need to go to the dryer factory across the street if the want to dry their clothes.

That eldritch was clearly just messing with you, but still... just in case, call Maddie and ask how she's doing. At the very least she'll know you're thinking about her.

tippler 2021/08/28(Sat)11:20 No. 1008918 ID: eedbeb
File 163017482225.png - (251.87KB , 1000x1100 , p18.png )

Once he has a moment between emails, Ahpin takes stock of what Bob took. He’s missing several ballpoint pens, a green highlighter, and his prized stapler.

A song by famed female rapper Fizzi Drinkz that doesn’t quite fit the mood comes on shuffle:

Step on his dick with my five inch heels,
He says please and thank you for the meal
Hoes don’t know how to treat a man
Fuck his ass and send him to the can

tippler 2021/08/28(Sat)11:20 No. 1008919 ID: eedbeb
File 163017483229.png - (176.37KB , 1000x1100 , p19.png )

Once Cepha returns to her office, Ahpin accosts her for a replacement stapler. The cuttlefish has bite marks up her neck and is positively glowing.

Peace of mind restored, Ahpin spends several hours working on the macros that’ll help automate the accounts approval process while plotting vague washer related revenge on the nuns.

tippler 2021/08/28(Sat)11:20 No. 1008920 ID: eedbeb
File 163017484674.png - (220.85KB , 1000x1100 , p20.png )

Ahpin starts to worry once the productive hours of the day have faded and he’s thumbing through his phone at his desk. Maddie always sends him a text after lunch, usually just a heart or a smiley face, but a couple hours have passed without a message.

Bob’s words add fuel to the gnawing concern. Elementals are hard to deal with, no matter how experienced a party is. A type of spirit, elementals range from benign Helium to extremely radioactive Uranium. Even more common elementals like Oxygen have to be extensively warded against or they’ll start leeching the breathable air from the surroundings.

Take a 15 minute break to ease your mind. Go to the break room, and break something, because, you know... that's what your supposed to do in the break room, break something.

Maybe there is someone to talk to in the room as well.

She's probably fine, that healer she adventures with looked like he wanted to get in her pocket real hard.

>>1008920
Just text her bro

Go to the break room and break the magically reconstructing toaster they have in there for you to break things. You don’t really get why you have a mandated 15 minute BREAK period where you have to break a thing but damn if it isn’t cathartic.

Oh and just shoot her a text you know it’s too distracting to call her during a dungeon run.

Text her, ask her if everything's okay.

tippler 2021/08/28(Sat)18:51 No. 1008947 ID: eedbeb
File 163020187137.png - (189.21KB , 1000x1100 , p21.png )

Ahpin shakes his head and makes a beeline for the break room, where he smashes cheap porcelain plates until he feels better. Like casual sex and therapy, the break room is company funded for mental health purposes, scientifically proven to increase productivity.

On the trip home, Ahpin texts Maddie a discrete question about their next date, a soft probe into whether she’s alive. He stuffs his phone in his jeans pocket and tries not to think about someone’s hemoglobin being torn from their body.

What is Ahpin’s evening routine?

Crossbow Lessons
Ramen dinner
get a tattoo
sex with a pirate

15:00 Dancing practice

20:00 Evening dab

21:00 Evening meal

21:30 Night peeing excersices

23:15 Maintenance rituals

23:45 Free space

00:00 Rest period









Evening meal

Visit the bar called Nutz, because that place is super nuts!

the bartender toad named Gordan who works there is pretty confident and chill. You trust him with not spilling the beans about your concerns happening in your life.

He goes directly home and cries himself to sleep, if alone.

I like going to the NUTZ to drink and dance. It's not an every day occurrence, but you do it on days you're feeling worried about Maddie, and days when you just want to hang out, okay you probably go there more then you should.

tippler 2021/08/29(Sun)08:32 No. 1008990 ID: eedbeb
File 163025115502.png - (194.87KB , 1000x1100 , p22.png )

The temptation to cry himself to sleep is quite strong, but Ahpin makes a quick dinner instead from a pricier variety of instant ramen noodles. He adds vegetables, a sheet of seaweed, and one of his hard boiled eggs.

Warm broth sloshing in his stomach, Ahpin makes a quick stop at the gym in his building that comes with built-in combat facilities and sends a few dozen rounds of crossbow bolts into a foam target. The repetitive motion gets boring and Ahpin heads for the tavern down the street.

tippler 2021/08/29(Sun)08:32 No. 1008991 ID: eedbeb
File 163025116219.png - (213.88KB , 1000x1100 , p23.png )

Nutz is a medieval style pub with good fries and homebrewed moonshine. Sturdy wood beams support the tall ceiling and Gordon, the toad bartender, slides steins of foamy beer to casual patrons and foreign adventurers who look like they’re fresh from a battle.

Ahpin comes here more often than he should, though he only has one or two drinks and leaves promptly before bedtime. To his annoyance, he spots the Nun’yas in casual clothes eating in the corner.

Does Ahpin:
-Mope at the bar
-Talk to the adventurers
-Talk to the Nuns

mope at the bar, you've earned your pint

Impress the ladies by shotting Gordon's fake moustache clear off with a crossbow shot.....again.

You were about to mope at the counter when you realize Gordan is naked under that apron for some reason. You decide to not ask questions and instead talk to the adventurers.

>>1008991
Time to mope because life is short, cruel, and ultimately futile!

Ask about the nuns' business.

You don't really want to think about the nuns, but you like hanging out with adventurers even if you don't want to be one. Talk to the adventurers.

tippler 2021/08/29(Sun)16:39 No. 1009033 ID: eedbeb
File 163028038660.png - (200.13KB , 1000x1100 , p24.png )

>Mope at the bar

Today started promising and got worse as it went. Ahpin gets Gordon’s attention and orders a pint of hearty ale that’s akin to drinking bread.

Gordon notices the cat’s forlorn expression and stops wiping glasses to lean over the bar.

“Something bothering you, son?”

tippler 2021/08/29(Sun)16:39 No. 1009034 ID: eedbeb
File 163028039392.png - (190.57KB , 1000x1100 , p25.png )

“Life is short, cruel, and ultimately futile.” Ahpin grumbles.

“Maddie gone adventuring again?” Gordon says good naturedly before lowering his voice. “Have you told her you’re ace yet?”

Ahpin glares at Gordon so hard that the bartender’s moustache falls off.

“Sorry.” Ahpin mutters while Gordon hastily tries to stick the fake hair back on his upper lip. He would have made a good mage but he got an accounting degree instead.

tell Ahpin the drink is half off to cheer him up. Let him know not to focus on the bad aspects of life, and look for the good, maybe recommend he take a vacation with Maddie.

>>1009034
How are you even supposed to approach her about it? Society is so sexually liberated and here you are as ace as a deck of cards.

"I mean... there's probably a reason you put up with it. Clearly something going on up here," point at your chest, then down at your crotch, "even if nothing's happening down here. Not a great look to keep her in the dark about it, though."

Ask him why he doesn't just go adventuring too? He's definitely got some kind of magic going on.

Suggest that if Ahpin can't fit in here he could always try an alternate dimension.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)08:48 No. 1009087 ID: eedbeb
File 163033852601.png - (220.86KB , 1000x1100 , p26.png )

“Lad,” says Gordon gently. “The longer you go without telling her, the worse the resentment will get. That lass cares about you, she won’t be upset.”

Ahpin groans. “You’re right, I almost told her yesterday but I chickened out because I was scared she’d dump me. And now today she went to the Ultimate Annihilation Dungeon.” Ahpin tugs at his hair. “People actually die there and she hasn’t been responding to messages. I might never see her again.”

Gordon taps the bar. “Have that drink on me and try not to focus on the worst case scenario.”

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)08:48 No. 1009088 ID: eedbeb
File 163033853329.png - (261.81KB , 1000x1100 , p27.png )

The toad returns to his barkeep duties and Ahpin sips his beer.

A hand slaps Ahpin in the small of the back, making him choke and start coughing into his elbow.

“Strong mana signature you got.” says a short but absolutely shredded hummingbird. “Heard you mention the Ultimate Annihilation Dungeon, we could use a mage to check out the first level tomorrow.” A lean snake next to the hummingbird with a longsword strapped to his back nods.

“I’m not a—“ Ahpin cuts himself off. Maddie’s in the dungeon, and going in there after her is a risky but plausible idea.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)08:49 No. 1009089 ID: eedbeb
File 163033854387.png - (214.36KB , 1000x1100 , p28.png )

“I’m not a mage.” he says carefully. “But I’d like to come with you and I’ll help find a real mage.”

“Great! I’ll buy us some pints.” the hummingbird says.

“It’s really fine—“

“It’s been hard to find folks to go on side quests.” The snake hisses. “Most people are worried about the mana vents in the ocean closing.”

What are the adventurers’ names? How do they find a mage?

The snake is named Eldoon

Tiddlywinks and Big Mamba, and they'll go looking for a mage by... ... looking for the biggest hat and flashiest Wizard robes around.

Well, Ahpin knows who the mages are, because he has to deal with a lot of support calls from the local mages whenever they accidentally leave magic items in their pockets when they wash their clothes. He recognizes some of the frequent offenders on sight by now, but has to wrestle with the ethical ramifications of potentially violating their privacy if he points them out.

Helga Pegsemall the hummingbird and Ssarsassossek Sessameseed the snake are unaware of this and were planning on finding mages by offering drinks to people with strong magical signatures in bars. Bonus points if the mage they find denies being a mage at all, because they're genre-savvy enough to know that's what all the best mages do (They are probably wrong about this).

Oh, that's a good idea. The best mages are the absent minded ones, and you've had to field calls from people so absent-mindedly magically potent the very devices they work with just malfunction in their presence...

>>1009089
Dupré (bird) and Talbot (snake).

>>1009095
Where do mages hang out? Is there an adventurer social app where you could find one? A local magical college you could find one?

You know a few mages from work. There’s one in particular that keeps calling you specifically bc you do good work. They always try to ask you out, but you keep putting it off. Maybe this time you’ll accept their offer on the condition they help

Lazy Snusan the snake and Myron Pecks the hummingbird. They find a mage by performing a summoning ritual really badly and waiting for someone to correct them.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)12:11 No. 1009103 ID: eedbeb
File 163035067988.png - (254.53KB , 1000x1100 , p29.png )

“I’m Tiddlywinks, Winks for short, and this is Eldoon.” says the bird after she gives Gordon her order. “We’re both all-rounders, though I’m better at stealth for obvious reasons.”

“Nice to meet you, I’m Ahpin, I work for Magilux Washers and Dryers. What have you guy tried so far?”

Eldoon sits at the bar and Winks hops up next to him. “We started by looking for someone with the biggest hat and flashiest robes, but wise old wizards are a pain to deal with. Then we visited a college’s job fair, but kids these days don’t want to start with the high level stuff.”

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)12:11 No. 1009104 ID: eedbeb
File 163035070122.png - (200.99KB , 1000x1100 , p30.png )

Ahpin considers the problem over a swig of beer. Customer support deals with a lot of mages who leave magical items in their pockets when using the machine, which neutralizes magic signatures. He could probably pull up a list but that would be violating people’s privacy.

The thought of work reminds Ahpin that a new kobold mage was just hired in IT. He’s seen her once in the halls and thought she was cute. The company offers PTO for short adventures since the call seems to strike everyone eventually.

“There’s someone I can ask from my work. Can we meet here tomorrow?” he asks.

“Sure, sounds great. We’ll bring equipment but you should take whatever weapons or supplies you want.” chirps Wink.

Ahpin exchanges numbers with the adventurers, finishes his single pint, and heads home.

Go and hit up that magebold. Grab a backpack with the usual good stuff; iron ration, spikes, small hammer, lantern, oil... sword, torch, backup dagger, helmet

Watch some television when you get home, maybe that show about solving math equations will come on.

Maybe search around the instant online delivery sites for something that can act as a big ol' "fuck you in particular" to elementals? N-no reason.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)17:49 No. 1009123 ID: eedbeb
File 163037099940.png - (161.11KB , 1000x1100 , p31.png )

The magnitude of Ahpin’s folly hits him hard that night and he compensates by reading every manual on adventuring he can find and going to the supply shop for rations, a lantern, new crossbow, torch, dagger, and helmet.

From what he can gather, the first floor of the three level dungeon isn’t too bad, mostly gases and changelings. There’s a colony of elves on the second level and heavier elementals on the third.

Unable to sleep from the adrenaline, the cat watches television until his alarm wakes him from a doze.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)17:50 No. 1009124 ID: eedbeb
File 163037100654.png - (210.43KB , 1000x1100 , p32.png )

Ahpin carries his heavy bag all the way to work. He’s in shape, but his back gets uncomfortably sweaty on the short trip, a dire omen of the trip head.

IT is on the first floor. Ahpin adjusts his bag and spots the kobold bending over a tangle of cords. He averts his eyes when he sees that her bottom half is naked.

“Oh hi!” the kobold says. “You’re in finance, right? Need something fixed?”

“No, uh—“

“Vivian.”

“No Vivian, I was actually wondering if you’d like to come adventuring for the day? Me and some adventurers I met are going to the Ultimate Annihilation dungeon and we could use someone who knows magic.” Ahpin says.

What does Vivian think of Ahpin?

She's been secretly crushing on him, but doesn't know he's already dating (or doesn't understand why that would be a problem if he was).

They were always in the same class together as kids, but Aphin senpai never noticed her. And now he asks her to go adventuring? Dream come true.

She has a big crush on him but either has asked Aphin out several times which he thought was jokes, or never had the courage to ask him. She’ll ask for a favor to go with and that’s that Aphin goes on one date with her

>>1009127
this

She can sense the high mana on Aphin and thinks he's actually a really powerful mage and wants to learn from him. She's also has a massive crush on him.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)20:23 No. 1009130 ID: eedbeb
File 163038018411.png - (152.01KB , 1000x1100 , p33.png )

“I’d love to go!” Vivian gushes. “Wow, Ahpin, this is, wow. I didn’t know you were an adventurer, that’s so cool.”

The sleep deprivation is starting to catch up to the cat, but years of evading group sex gave Ahpin strong instincts as to whether someone is interested in him and the kobold was practically broadcasting her crush.

What made beautiful women show interest in him? Was it the pants? If she managed to spit it out he’d turn her down but in the meantime Ahpin was going to try not to think about dying in a hydrogen gas explosion.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)20:23 No. 1009131 ID: eedbeb
File 163038019513.png - (160.41KB , 1000x1100 , p34.png )

“Great.” says Ahpin. “Glad you’re coming. Well, they said they’d have supplies and we won’t be there too long so let’s go.”

Blushing kobold in tow, Ahpin leads the way to the Nutz, where Wink and Eldoon are enjoying an early schooner.

tippler 2021/08/30(Mon)20:23 No. 1009132 ID: eedbeb
File 163038020349.png - (306.45KB , 1000x1100 , p35.png )

The gang heads from the tavern to the nearest gate station which spits them out at the edge of the city. After a short walk through a grassy field, the ground becomes rockier, culminating in an ominous, boulder lined pit in the ground.

Everybody brought rope, right? Tiddlywinks flexes down there to scout it out.

Tiddlywinks, do your scouting bit. Eldoon, make vague allusions to sexy adventuring times.

>>1009132
Because no one is wearing shoes, everyone gets sharp pointy rocks jabbing their feet!

……well, maybe Eldoon and Vivian are immune to the pointy rocks, depending on how tough their scales are.

>years of evading group sex

Ahpin really needs to just tell his girlfriend he's ace. Here's hoping he'll get an opportunity to.

It sounds like you should all stick together to avoid the danger of changelings. Is there any magic Vivian knows to detect dangerous gasses? What you guys really need is a mining safety test lamp, the kind with a wire mesh that cools the air passing it, preventing it from igniting gasses but allowing it to be used to detect the presence of said gasses.

Vivian should fill the rest of the group in on her magical powers, while tiddlywinks scouts ahead

step one for an party, everyone should explain their basic capabilities.

Tiddlywinks should scout, maybe everyone talks about how they hate pants but Aphin LOVES pants.

Someone should throw a rock down that pit. Why? I don't know.

Winks is warned about gases, then heads down to scout, maybe arming herself with a wet face-covering.

Her size isn't her only advantage; there's a purpose behind a hummingbird's natural mass-to-size ratio.

Winks is SPEED.

And yeah, Vivian should prolly inform the others about what she can actually do.

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)12:04 No. 1009154 ID: eedbeb
File 163043669465.png - (151.42KB , 1000x1100 , p36.png )

“Before we go in, let’s review everyone’s abilities.” says Eldoon. “I can do minor illumination spells and I have an enchanted sword. Good at sensing heat signatures and immune to most poisons.”

Winks hops forward. “I’m a brawler, but I’m also proficient in short range weapons. Same on the basic spells and I can fly and move really fast when I’m not hungry.”

“Let’s see, erm, my specialty is digital spells but I can cast mana detection, fireball, basic healing, magic ward, and telekinesis.” Vivian stammers.

Everyone looks at Ahpin.

“I can use a crossbow so-so.” the cat says.

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)12:05 No. 1009155 ID: eedbeb
File 163043670251.png - (156.68KB , 1000x1100 , p37.png )

Winks heads into the craggy depths, light spell on her head growing faint as she descends.

Eldoon turns to the kobold. “Vivian, Winks and I are only planning to explore the first level, if Ahpin wants to keep going you can go with him or come back with us.”

“Okay.” Vivian pulls herself straighter. “I’ll see what I think, I’ve never been to a dungeon like this before.”

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)12:05 No. 1009156 ID: eedbeb
File 163043672863.png - (184.21KB , 1000x1100 , p38.png )

Winks returns after maybe ten minutes, feathers sparkling with motes.

“The entrance opens into a three way corridor.” the bird puffs. “The ground gets smoother and things get brighter as it goes. This place is loaded with mana.”

“You didn’t see any spirits?” Ahpin asks.

“Nope, though there were a couple sprites flying around.”

Ahpin lights his lantern and follows Winks as she leads the group to the aforementioned corridor. The tall ceiling is loaded with multicolored flecks of light and Ahpin hears a distant buzzing.

There are three paths: right, left, and forward. There’s a neat stone sign on the left path, reading ‘bathroom’ and the right path seems cleaner than the others.

"Secure the bathroom. All negotiations go smoother when you hold a monopoly on relief."

You’ve been up forever and hopped up on coffee right? Maybe take a quick restroom break?

The toilet inside is a mimic!

investigate bathroom. It's probably full of spiders.

Take the cleaner path. It's probably better-travelled, which probably means safer.

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)18:27 No. 1009173 ID: eedbeb
File 163045962388.png - (156.11KB , 1000x1100 , p39.png )

“Do they usually have bathrooms in dungeons?” Vivian asks. “I can see the benefit, you know, to keep things hygienic.”

“I wouldn’t expect a dungeon like this to have one, since it isn’t as popular. Usually the Adventurers’ Guild builds the latrines.” Eldoon says uncertainly.

The group gives a collective shrug and heads to the left to investigate the claims of the sign. After walking along sculpted rock walls for five minutes the corridor opens into a gleaming marble cavern. What’s clearly a sink with a constant stream of water emerging from the faucet curves along an outcropping of rock. Next to it is a standard ceramic toilet.

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)18:27 No. 1009174 ID: eedbeb
File 163045963564.png - (197.30KB , 1000x1100 , p40.png )

The sound of running water reminds Ahpin that the morning was several cups of coffee ago.
“I need to take a piss. Could you guys step around the corner?” Ahpin says.

“No problem. Let me just…” Winks jabs the toilet with her fists and slams the bowl with an uppercut. “Not a mimic. We’ll go a bit further to see where this corridor goes and then double back.”

The buzzing seems louder when the others are gone. Ahpin hurries to catch up when he’s done and finds the party at another fork. There’s a strange popping sound up ahead and no noise coming from the right.

>>1009174
Go through the middle path, towards the noise.

Investigate noise with the boys

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)19:42 No. 1009182 ID: eedbeb
File 163046417891.png - (189.47KB , 1000x1100 , p41.png )

The sporadic popping noise gets louder as Ahpin trudges through the tunnel. The air is fresh and cool, but he still feels claustrophobic.

Ahpin notices that Eldoon is sketching on a piece of paper.

“I’m keeping track of where we are.” the snake explains. “The walls are curving so I think the paths might connect to each other.”

tippler 2021/08/31(Tue)19:43 No. 1009183 ID: eedbeb
File 163046418572.png - (267.62KB , 1000x1100 , p42.png )

Rushing water joins the sound of small explosions as the party comes to another open space.

There are two elementals bickering above the running water, an underground stream that must feed the bathroom. Whenever one gets too close to the other, there’s a sharp bang and a brief flash of light.

“I can’t believe you fucked an adventurer!” says the lavender moth.

The blue mantis scoffs. “What, jealous?”

“You know we’re not supposed to talk to them! If they start thinking this place is safe they’ll be swarming all over.”

Ask if it was Maddie

blue mantis: and look what's coming around the corner but a whole quartet of potential conquests. time to work that elemental charm

Pink moth: Think you're a lot scarier looking than you actually are.

Study them to determine which elements they are, then knock them out. Ask where your girlfriend is.

I'm not sure what two elements spontaneously explode. I'm aware of Na-group elements violently reacting in the presence of water, but water is a compound.

Adventurers have an education in elementals, right? Do any of you guys know what they could be?

Blue elemental, fixate on the mysterious and attractive piece of apparel affixed to the blue adventurer. Pink elemental threaten everyone who just came in with violence

>>1009183
"Y'know, you may not want that sort of info leaking. Just a thought."

Also, lavender moth should ask Blue Manits if she at least bit the adventurer's head off after fucking, because she is a mantis after all.

Everyone should talk about how pants are sexy and mysterious and Aphin should groan and try to just walk away in embarrassment

Eldoon: "I mean, if this is just your house or something, there's people you can talk to about de-officiating this place as a dungeon."

tippler 2021/09/01(Wed)13:18 No. 1009236 ID: eedbeb
File 163052752979.png - (251.74KB , 1000x1100 , p43.png )

Winks clears her throat and the elementals flinch and slowly turn to look at the adventurers.

"See? We already have more." the moth says in a stage whisper. "The elves are going to flip and Dusty hates cleaning up after them."

"You're pent up. If you got laid you'd feel better."

"Great elementals, we apologize for intruding in your home." Eldoon says. "Our companion is looking for his friend who was one of the adventurers from earlier. Ahpin, could you describe her?"

Ahpin's mouth is fixed in a silent scream as he stares at the spirits.

tippler 2021/09/01(Wed)13:19 No. 1009237 ID: eedbeb
File 163052756085.png - (209.40KB , 1000x1100 , p44.png )

The moth presses her advantage. She soars across the water to flutter irately above the group. "Scram! Shoo!"

The mantis joins her. "Don't be like that, this blue one's cute. I like his pants."

Ahpin does an abrupt 180 degree turn and walks back out the way he came.

"Well." says the mantis. "This snake is cute too." She elbows the moth and the resulting detonation knocks over Vivian. "C'mon, have some fun."

Ahpin and the group have been separated, please suggest for both.

group: descend into debauchery. just act like absolute animals. dicks out everywhere. except for vivian, see what's got ahpin acting so unlike himself?

ahpin: get some you time, walk away from that crazy shit and have a breather.

Ahpin: just go along the other direction at the last fork, heading towards the center. The elementals all but stated this place is safe so you can just look for your gf on your own.

Aphin: take a nap, you need it

Group: lets get this moth some well needed release

Vivian: find Aphin. Eldoon: boff the moff. Winks: ask why they keep exploding when they touch.
Aphin: see if one of the paths doesn’t double back.

Vivian: follow Ahpin, you're concerned.

Moff may be a Potassium elemental. Boffing usually involves lots of water-based fluids. Maybe don't boff the moff?

Ahpin: It's not like they focused on you or anything. Maybe your companions will deal with them and you can just slink back, kind of embarrassed for running away?

Vivian: Check on Ahpin.

Viv check on Aphin that response is concerning

Eldoon: Stop Viv from going after Ahpin - the wizard's probably the only one with even a shot at hurting one or both of these elementals should things turn south - but do send Winks after him in her stead.

tippler 2021/09/01(Wed)17:40 No. 1009269 ID: eedbeb
File 163054325652.png - (205.78KB , 1000x1100 , p45.png )

Ahpin heads back to the last fork to wait. He puts down his pack and rests against the wall in the hallway that goes to the center of the circular dungeon floor.

The adrenaline from facing an oxygen and a hydrogen elemental simultaneously wears off after a few minutes, leaving him with a mild headache. Ahpin slumps against the hard stone and closes his eyes. A short nap couldn’t hurt.

Despite the awful buzzing, the cat falls asleep.

tippler 2021/09/01(Wed)17:41 No. 1009270 ID: eedbeb
File 163054326699.png - (236.47KB , 1000x1100 , p46.png )

The moth hesitates, then lowers herself in front of Eldoon.

“I’m Holly.” she says stiffly.

The snake dips his head. “Lovely to meet you, Holly. Please, direct me how you see fit.”

tippler 2021/09/01(Wed)17:41 No. 1009271 ID: eedbeb
File 163054328938.png - (242.46KB , 1000x1100 , p47.png )

While Holly warms up to Eldoon, Winks rummages around in her bag. The mantis drifts closer to get a better look.

“You want a piece of this?” Winks asks, unveiling an enormous strap-on and a battery operated vibrator.

“Fuck yeah. I’m Olive by the way.”

“Winks.”

“Take off any metal you’re wearing or it’ll rust.” Olive says. “The guy from earlier was pissed when I oxidized his magic axe.”

“Um, I’m gonna go check on Ahpin.” Vivian says, blushing fiercely. The kobold slowly backs away from the preparations.

tippler 2021/09/01(Wed)17:41 No. 1009272 ID: eedbeb
File 163054329762.png - (189.86KB , 1000x1100 , p48.png )

Once Vivian is out of earshot, she casts her detection spell to find Ahpin. The cat has a vibrant mana signature, and the spell picks it up immediately.

She traces his steps back towards the bathroom. The background buzz of sprites reaches a fever pitch as she finds Ahpin tucked away against the rock, unresponsive.

The cat is absolutely covered in the small creatures, his candy blue mana heavy in their abdomen sacks. Some look part way into morphing into changelings.

Vivian: Make Aphin look like a printer ink disaster and squash those sprites.

slap those motherfuckers! our man is in trouble!

They're sucking the juices out of your man, make them suffer

Shoo them away high mana signatures squashed near a body could cause damage to his system. Maybe snag one to give him a reverse transfusion if mana is like blood.

splat the wasps before they become a lot more dangerous

tippler 2021/09/02(Thu)07:01 No. 1009312 ID: eedbeb
File 163059131758.png - (240.72KB , 1000x1100 , p49.png )

Vivian coats her hands in fire and beats her way through the swarm. The fae pupae shatter against the magic and splatter mana across the ground.

The other sprites buzz around frantically. Some feast on their fallen kin and others latch onto Vivian’s back. She feels them start to drain her mana.

Two changelings are crouched over Ahpin’s chest. They hiss at her, and the noise makes Ahpin grunt and stir.

tippler 2021/09/02(Thu)07:02 No. 1009313 ID: eedbeb
File 163059132841.png - (122.71KB , 1000x1100 , p50.png )

“That’s good, right there.” Holly sighs, grinding her pelvis into Eldoon’s face. The snake lifts the elemental up with his hands to take a deep breath, then dives back in.

Winks and Olive are sprawled panting on the floor.

“One more?” Winks asks.

“Why not.” Olive says.

tippler 2021/09/02(Thu)07:02 No. 1009314 ID: eedbeb
File 163059134389.png - (218.48KB , 1000x1100 , p51.png )

“Ahpin! Are you okay?” Vivian claws at her back but can’t reach the sprites.

“Wuh? You guys done already?” Ahpin groans. He rubs his eyes and takes in the streaks of color and the changelings in his lap.

“Wuh?” one mimics. The other grows a pair of cat ears.

Welp.

Stuff the kids in your inventory or whatever.

Dual wield changelings to slap the sprites off Vivian’s back.

Ahpin: you freak out at the sprites on Vivian's back, jump up and run towards her in the hopes that your useless flailing can get rid of them.

Vivian: you attempt to crush the sprites on your back by falling over backwards, but time it poorly with Ahpin's leap up and accidentally trip him on top of you.

Eldoon: she says "right there," you keep going right there, but if your head starts spinning you gotta apologize and push her off to breathe. It might not be the sexiest move but neither is passing out from breathing too much hydrogen.

Changelings: Try to nurse off of your new papa Ahpin

>>1009316
Changeling: punch the sprites as Ahpin does this

tippler 2021/09/02(Thu)15:08 No. 1009324 ID: eedbeb
File 163062053707.png - (245.00KB , 1000x1100 , p52.png )

Ahpin stares at the changelings, which stare back.

"Hungwy." says the talkative one, reaching its hands for Ahpin's arm.

Ahpin is struck by generations of perfected evolutionary paternal instincts, which hit like a punch from an iron elemental. He gapes at the changelings as they nibble at his skin, sucking mana from his body.

It doesn’t feel like anything. If he were a mage he’d probably be able to detect the change in his mana, but Ahpin is blissfully ignorant.

tippler 2021/09/02(Thu)15:09 No. 1009325 ID: eedbeb
File 163062055070.png - (255.00KB , 1000x1100 , p53.png )

"Can you help me get these off?" Vivian asks.

"Oh yeah, sorry!" Ahpin gently picks up the changelings and moves them to the floor, then scrambles towards the kobold.

Vivian tries to crush the sprites on her back at the same time Ahpin slips on a puddle of mana. They collide in a tangle of limbs and the changelings chow down on the dislodged sprites.

tippler 2021/09/02(Thu)15:09 No. 1009326 ID: eedbeb
File 163062057911.png - (215.21KB , 1000x1100 , p54.png )

Eldoon lifts Holly off of him again.

"Getting dizzy." he gasps.

Holly floats above the snake while he recovers, then sinks onto his dick. The snake shivers.

“Too cold?” Holly says. “Better get me off fast then.”

Eldoon : show her Holly skilled you are with your "sword"

Vivian : panic and make sure Aphin is okay

Aphin: internalize your new life with these infant changelings who are definitely too cute to ever kill. Also try to avoid any lewd situations with viv.

Vivian: Panic, but make no attempt to avoid lewd situations with Aphin during the confusion

Eldoon: I hope you can handle the cold, because now is the time to stick your dick in that.

Vivian: Lose glasses.
Aphin: These aren't my glasses!

Changelings: go outside the dungeon and play tag or something for awhile as Alpin and Vivian sort this out. Dungeon is too dangerous for them.

Changelings: Run away but hide in a corner because Vivian is trying to scare them off

Vivian: Try to shoo them off and explain how changelings are actually really bad mana vampires that kill kin who don't DO something about it or avoid them. Even the well intentioned ones.

Eldoon: Be skilled with *sword* and do the adventuring thing and pierce her with it.

Aphin: Carry around the changelings on your shoulders like a dad at an amusement park.

Eldoon: Think of the cute nerdy kobold to keep your heart warm. Scream her name, Holly won't mind.

Vivian: Be the horny stereotype that you were made to be and ruin this mans whole career with hips and lips that grip.

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)08:44 No. 1009357 ID: eedbeb
File 163068384507.png - (264.93KB , 1000x1100 , p55.png )

Eldoon blinks then turns his head to where Winks is cuddled in Olive’s long arms. “Pass the vibrator.”

“She likes a frequency of 4401 and 4161 inverse centimeters.” the mantis supplies helpfully.

“Eh?” says Eldoon. Winks tosses the vibrator and he snatches it out of the air with his tail.

Holly pinches the bridge of her snout. “Olive, they don’t know about vibrational frequencies.”

“But you do like it.”

“Yes but I don’t think a stick of plastic can—never mind.”

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)08:44 No. 1009358 ID: eedbeb
File 163068385772.png - (289.73KB , 1000x1100 , p56.png )

Vivian ends up straddling Ahpin’s side, breasts pressed against his shoulder.

“Sorry!” the kobold says, making no attempt to move. “Are you sure you feel okay? You lost a ton of mana.”

“Literally don’t feel a difference.” Ahpin says. He makes clucking noises at the changelings and they scamper towards him.

“Go away.” Vivian growls at the creatures.

“What? No, those are my kids.” Ahpin says. “I’m a father now. This is the best day of my life. We are going to play catch and go camping and attend a ball game.”

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)08:44 No. 1009359 ID: eedbeb
File 163068388333.png - (193.40KB , 1000x1100 , p57.png )

“You were afraid of the nice elementals but you’re not scared of these mana vampires?” Vivian asks incredulously.

“I’m hungwy papa.” says the changeling, mouth streaked with red.

“I would die for you.” says Ahpin without missing a beat.

Vivian sighs. Ahpin is being awfully cute but she doesn’t want those little gremlins near her. She shifts her hips and, with great regret, stands up. The changelings clamber on Ahpin’s shoulders and start gnawing on his ears.

Ahpin and Vivian can explore or wait for Winks and Eldoon, who will be done shortly. Suggest names for the changelings.

Vivian: suggest Chuck and Barry, because you want to throw them away and dump them in a hole (don't say that last part out loud.)

Winks: helpfully demonstrate what a 4300 inverse cm vibration looks like for Eldoon.

Aphin: Scoop up the mana goo and put it in a sippy cup for the kids, they look like they need a snac. Don't think about how sticky the floor is or what it looks like under a UV light. Hopefully by the time you're done everyone else will be finished collecting their goo too.

Vivian: Academically list the long-term dangers of these changeling leeches.
Changelings: Eat enough to egg.

Phina and Naphi. Keep exploring while the others keep the elementals busy.

Rhinestone and Sapphire.

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)13:57 No. 1009367 ID: eedbeb
File 163070263822.png - (236.67KB , 1000x1100 , p58.png )

Ahpin empties a water bottle and collects as much mana goo as he can for later while Vivian hovers nervously nearby.

“You know, they use these things to drain the mana out of people so they can’t be mages anymore.” she says.

“Do you think Naphi is a good name? Too narcissistic?” Ahpin asks pensively.

Vivian groans. “Yeah, maybe not. Name one of them Chuck.”

“I like it, you’ll be Chuck.” Ahpin points to the cat-eared changeling. “And you’ll be, um, Rhine.”

“Let’s go wait for the other two, I don’t want us to get separated.” Vivian says.

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)13:57 No. 1009368 ID: eedbeb
File 163070264861.png - (214.94KB , 1000x1100 , p59.png )

Eldoon carefully flips Holly on to her back.

“Is this comfortable?” he asks, handing her the vibrator.

The elemental tries the switch a few times, and gives an undignified squeak when she puts the toy on her clit as Eldoon begins to thrust into her cunt. “Yes, it’s good. I need to get one of these.”

“You can keep it.” Winks says charitably. “You’ll have to get new batteries eventually though.”

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)13:57 No. 1009369 ID: eedbeb
File 163070265681.png - (234.02KB , 1000x1100 , p60.png )

Vivian and Ahpin sit outside the river room until Winks and Eldoon emerge. The hummingbird is as energetic as ever while the snake looks tired, but cheerful.

“They told us the other group went further down.” Winks explains. “They said it was just three people, a dog, a sheep centaur, and a chimera.”

“There must be stairs to the next level somewhere we haven’t explored yet.” Eldoon gives Chuck and Rhine a confused look, but doesn’t comment.

Does the group decide to go to the other side of the dungeon (clean area), or explore the middle?

Let's go to the clean area.

Clean area, this dungeon looks to be vaguely circular, so the boss/stairs are likely in the center of it, and a good adventurer always full clears a floor before they move on.

Vivian: Quietly admire Aphin's responsible fatherly attitude, but also tell Eldoon you think he might be under the effect of changeling mind control.

Eldoon: Recall all relevant facts regarding changelings.

Aphin: Suggest exploring clean section because its safer for children.

full clear FULL CLEAR FULL CLEAR

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)19:06 No. 1009384 ID: eedbeb
File 163072116165.png - (146.58KB , 1000x1100 , p61.png )

“Let’s go around to the right side, for completion sake.” says Winks.

The party continues past the elementals, skips another fork that would lead to the center, and ends up in a small, smooth walled room devoid of motes. Vivian summons a bright orb to light the area.

In the center, on a small platform of rock, are three golden eggs sitting together in a nest of grey fluff.

tippler 2021/09/03(Fri)19:06 No. 1009385 ID: eedbeb
File 163072118115.png - (201.16KB , 1000x1100 , p62.png )

“Look babies, eggs! That’ll be you someday once you’re big and strong and whoa whoa whoa—” Ahpin says as Eldoon unsheathes his sword and advances slowly on the nest.

“Can you detect any strong mana signatures nearby?” Winks asks Vivian sharply.

The kobold stutters her denial while Ahpin draws Chuck and Rhine to his chest. “What’s going on?” he says.

“Mana eggs are very valuable.” Eldoon says evasively.

“In terms of loot, they’re top tier. We’ve snagged an egg or two before. I know it’s scummy but adventurers have to make a living somehow.” confesses Winks.

what the fuck guys. just join the union if you need a steady paycheck that bad

Seems like a trap. Eggs this valuable being here this early on amd haven't beem grabbed by other explorers in the past? What's the catch?

Did a goose lay these eggs? Maybe reveal a angery goosey trying to protect it's golden eggs.

Don't touch the eggs until you know what's laid them. Alimony's coming out of your loot shares.

>>1009385
If they’re that valuable, then why are they still here? Wouldn’t the previous group have grabbed them already? And is the thing that laid the eggs still here?

>>1009385
Who lays these eggs? Is there an actual moral dilemma or are you just robbing a non-sapient creature's nest?
If you can fight off the mother and it's not a person or anything, go ahead and snag that loot.

reminder that the magic creature life cycle lore is in this post >>1008858

tldr, changelings become eggs, they don't get laid by anything

Ah okay.
Still search for traps. It seems kinda weird it's out in the open like that and not hidden, i would think if before a changeling becomes an egg, they'd want to hide somewhere instead of being out in the open.

Don't forget this is the Ultimate Annihilation Dungeon. These eggs have to be protected.

But yeah, as long as you sell them to wealthy families who want to adopt heirs and not slaves, go for it.

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)08:06 No. 1009427 ID: eedbeb
File 163076798448.png - (284.28KB , 1000x1100 , p63.png )

“There has to be something guarding them, if they’re that valuable.” Ahpin says.

“Yes, there’s usually a spirit in the area, which is why I asked Vivian to check.” Winks says. “Since this dungeon isn’t popular they’re probably not watching them as closely. I bet the spirit is further along this corridor, which is why we haven’t seen them.”

Eldoon puts down his sword and takes one of the eggs in his hands. It gleams in the light of Vivian’s spell.

“Egg tasty.” says Chuck, poking his head out from Ahpin’s arms.

“Chuck!” says Ahpin, aghast.

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)08:06 No. 1009428 ID: eedbeb
File 163076800368.png - (176.40KB , 1000x1100 , p64.png )

“What do people use the eggs for?” Vivian asks.

“The shell is made into magical armor and the contents can be made into mana boosting elixirs. Some people also try to induce elemental development, though that usually results in an eldritch.” explains Winks.

Eldoon puts the egg in his pack. “We’ll go back the way we came. If we encounter the spirit, we’ll fight them, though hopefully we can avoid that.”

Vivian frowns. “You’re leaving?”

Do Ahpin and Vivian:
-Walk Eldoon and Winks to the exit
-Move on to the center of the dungeon (stairs)
-Warn the guardian spirit

Warning the spirit seems like a dumb, self destructive action that'll piss off everyone here. But you already adopted changelings so sense was thrown out the window a while ago. If anyone knows where Maddie is, it's the guardian spirit. It's probably in your best interests to get on it's good side, but the adventurers have been helping you out a decent bit so far. Tough choice, piss off the people helping you or piss off the spirit. Then again they are leaving your soft ass for money, but that's reasonable considering.

Cutebold is still chilling here either way so... hmm, at least the guardian might like that you kept the changelings, they'll be eggs soon right? Maybe you should just walk the snake out and react when needed. The coward's approach seems solid here.

Move on to the dungeon center.

>>1009428
Escort them to the exit. They could potentially die otherwise.

>>1009428
Escort them to the exit.

Don’t be a dick and try to warn the guardian spirit, that’ll just get someone killed.

be Lawful Good and do not the egg.

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)16:28 No. 1009444 ID: eedbeb
File 163079807915.png - (261.43KB , 1000x1100 , p65.png )

>Don’t take the egg

Ahpin would very much like for Eldoon to leave the eggs alone but he is a father now and that means making sacrifices such as not arguing with the large snake with a magic sword.

>Escort Eldoon and Winks to the exit

The crew takes the long way back to the original fork and don’t run into the guardian spirit.

“Well, this is it for us.” Winks says. “We’ll send another party after you if you haven’t come back by tomorrow evening.”

“You’re staying?” Ahpin says to Vivian, surprised.

The kobold blushes. “Y-yes of course! I wouldn’t let you go alone.”

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)16:28 No. 1009445 ID: eedbeb
File 163079809075.png - (241.63KB , 1000x1100 , p66.png )

After Eldoon and Winks fade to faint specks in the dark, Ahpin sits on the cold floor and pulls two packages of rations out of his bag.

“Late lunch or early dinner.” he says with a smile. Rhine and Chuck fight over the bottle of colorful slime while Vivian and Ahpin eat handfuls of trail mix and strips of dried meat.

They’re relaxing after their meal when the air pressure in the dungeon palpably shifts and there’s a distant, furious roar.

“Ah.” says Ahpin. He swallows and his ears pop while the changelings squeal and huddle against him.

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)16:28 No. 1009446 ID: eedbeb
File 163079810236.png - (216.93KB , 1000x1100 , p67.png )

From the right corridor comes a hot wind, a growing light, then the guardian spirit bursts into the foyer.

“THIEVES! MONSTERS!” the spirit howls. Ahpin can barely make out a pair of long ears in the bright silhouette.

Vivian half-heartedly moves to get to her feet, then changes her mind.

rabbit: THUMP
vivian: help shield the dad and his kids

Tell her sorry, they already left.

"Theives went thata way *points to exit* monsters are thataway *points in direction of the moth and mantis*"

Yeah, agreed. rabbit maid needs to thump in intense anger

Rabbit maid thump adorably, everyone else point that the thieves went that a way, rabbit maid should then try to skulk off but get rebounded by the dungeon exit and get mad, maybe calm down at the site of the two cute kids

Aphin: Where?
Bun maid: Complain about Vivian's lack of pants.

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)20:09 No. 1009473 ID: eedbeb
File 163081136781.png - (143.29KB , 1000x1100 , p68.png )

“The people who stole the egg left the dungeon.” Ahpin says. “We didn’t want them to take it, but I guess we didn’t stop them either.”

Vivian yelps as the rabbit advances on them. “We’re really sorry, I know that egg meant a lot to you.”

The rabbit dims, touches down to the floor, and stamps her foot in a distinct thump.

“I can’t chase after them or someone might come for the other two.” she says tearfully. She thumps the ground again in frustration.

tippler 2021/09/04(Sat)20:09 No. 1009474 ID: eedbeb
File 163081137515.png - (293.49KB , 1000x1100 , p69.png )

Vivian and Ahpin stay silent as the rabbit takes a deep, shuddering breath. “I’m Dusty, the caretaker of this dungeon, though I really only go to the first two levels. We don’t usually get visitors. Are you here for the group that went down yesterday?”

“Yes, we are.” Ahpin says eagerly. “We’re not normal adventurers, I’m just looking for my girlfriend.”

Vivian flinches slightly at the word ‘girlfriend’, but Ahpin doesn’t notice.

Dusty wipes her eyes. “I’ll take you to the stairs and introduce you to the elves, but once you retrieve your friends I never want to see you or any other mortals here again.”

Vivian and Ahpin can ask Dusty questions while they walk.

Are you a dust elemental? What does that mean for your abilities?
Why is there a fake bathroom?
Why don't you go down to the other levels?

look, as a caretaker to these two changelings i can understand how much this means to you. if you will allow me to protect these two eggs as i go in search of my friends i will promise with my life i will return them. then, you can go after the other two. please try to only scare them into giving up the egg, but do what you have to do.

I think someone should text ELDOON and let them know the dungeon will be closed if the egg isnt returned.

OR:

People outside, arrest them for stealing the egg and another crew brings it back because they already knew about this, it's popular knowledge, but Aphin and Vivian don't because they're not adventurers.

Dusty: Be sad, clean up goo, lead them onward, praise Aphin for his child rearing

Dusty: lead them to where Eldoon and Winks had sex with Holly and Olive. Thump again in anger at the gooey mess they made and pause to clean it

Ahpin:text Eldoon, you came across its caretaker and she wants her egg back, otherwise she wont allow mortals in here again

Vivian: ask Ahpin his opinion on polyamorous romantic relationships. Why are you asking? Uhhhhhh... no reason, hahaha.

>>1009474
I’m gonna be perfectly honest here: You’ve got no one to blame but yourself. It was very irresponsible to leave the eggs unguarded like that.

Has the spirit considered selling eggshells?
Also yeah offer help getting the egg back.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)08:51 No. 1009509 ID: eedbeb
File 163085706036.png - (156.34KB , 1000x1100 , p70.png )

Instead of heading down the center path, Dusty takes the pair to the left. The bunny takes out her feather duster and brushes away the motes as she goes.

Ahpin lingers in the back and texts Eldoon. The snake replies immediately.

Ahpin: Hey man could you bring that egg back? We ran into the guardian spirit and she’s really upset

Eldoon: If you are able to text, that means you are not dead and therefore it is not a problem

Ahpin: Bro you sound like a massive douche

Eldoon: Tell that to a retail value of 50,000 rallod

“Did you make the bathroom?” Vivian asks, as Dusty checks the sink and produces a roll of toilet paper.

“Kind of, I had to ask the elementals to shape the stone.” Dusty huffs. “I’m a broad base spirit, so I can do more stuff but I’m not as strong.”

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)08:51 No. 1009510 ID: eedbeb
File 163085706774.png - (211.98KB , 1000x1100 , p71.png )

Dusty clears away the remnants of sprites in the hallway where Ahpin took a nap.

“Once I collect enough motes, I feed the sprites, but it looks like someone killed most of them.” Dusty grumbles.

“Sorry about that.” Ahpin says. “But look, two of them became strong, beautiful changelings who are also my children that I love forever and will never sell for egg parts.”

He holds Rhine and Chuck out for Dusty to see. The changelings squirm and squeak in protest.

“They’re quite healthy.” the spirit says grudgingly.

“There might be some, er, goo in the river room.” pipes up Vivian. “The other adventurers had a lot of sex there.”

The kobold jumps as Dusty thumps the ground again. “I’ll get that after I drop you off.” she groans.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)08:51 No. 1009511 ID: eedbeb
File 163085707752.png - (199.52KB , 1000x1100 , p72.png )

The group heads for the middle of the dungeon, where a spiral staircase lined with glowing orbs sinks into the floor.

“Come on then.” Dusty says.

Vivian summons her own light and follows the rabbit into the depths.

“So, Ahpin, are you and your girlfriend…exclusive?” Vivian asks hopefully.

“I am, she’s not, though we need to have a talk about the whole relationship thing.” Ahpin sighs.

The staircase ends in a small stone pen on the floor of an enormous cavern. Ahpin and Vivian stop, shocked, as they take in what looks like a normal city block transposed underground.

“More mortals? Dusty, this place is turning into a zoo.” drawls the sleek figure leaning against the wall.

what in the goddamn?

...Are we absolutely certain this is a dungeon? Has that ever been officially confirmed? Because this has very, very few of the qualities that make a dungeon.

Ah, you must be the mascot then.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)13:40 No. 1009522 ID: eedbeb
File 163087443696.png - (274.83KB , 1000x1100 , p73.png )

“Is this still a dungeon?” Ahpin says weakly.

“Oh dear, and you didn’t get smart ones either.” says the elf. They stroll over to the edge of the small enclosure and give Ahpin a once over. “Buddy, we’re not scratching in the dirt like animals. Elves are the strongest mages in the world, and we have elemental neighbors who make construction a breeze.”

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)13:40 No. 1009523 ID: eedbeb
File 163087444495.png - (231.34KB , 1000x1100 , p74.png )

“Yes, yes, you’re very impressive.” Dusty says. “I have eggs to guard so can I trust you to show them around?”

“Anything for you, darling Dusty.” the elf says. They beckon to Ahpin and Vivian and start walking towards the stone buildings.

“Let’s see, we have a population of 271, most of whom live there—“ The elf points to the tallest building that resembles a block of cheese with mana mold spilling from the holes. “Mana collection fields over there, manufacturing area next to them, government office, karaoke slash arcade which has a half off deal every full moon…”

Bubbles filled with yellow and red motes drift through the air. Ahpin sees a few elves poking their heads out to ogle the visitors.

elf: do like everyone does
begin coming on to the pantscat

Rhine and Chuck: sneak off from Ahpin, rush to the mana collection fields and eat as much mana as you can!

Aphin : ask how this isn't just considered a city at this point

Children : Begin rushing to gorge yourselves on the abundant mana

Elf : Begin flirting with the strangely attractive cat man

Vivian : Begin thinking of ways to replace Aphin's girlfriend

>>1009523
Ahpin: I JUST. WANT TO FIND. MY GIRLFRIEND. Who I am 99% certain at this point is just fucking around somewhere!

"No, seriously, is this still a dungeon? Was this ever a dungeon to begin with? This is my first outing, and I already feel less like an adventurer and more like a home invader. Everything that wasn't a mote in this place so far has been a person. Are we sure there hasn't been some monumental fuck-up with who decides these labels?"

>>1009535
Yeah basically this.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)16:08 No. 1009540 ID: eedbeb
File 163088330080.png - (230.65KB , 1000x1100 , p75.png )

“—And that’s the soap shop, lovely place, it’s a wonder what they can do with mushroom fragrances.” the elf continues.

“Sorry to interrupt, er, what’s your name?” Vivian interjects. “We’re both new to this, but it seems like this dungeon is a home rather than a place for adventurers to explore.”

“It’s Briar, and nonsense! If we didn’t want visitors we’d close off the entrance, there’s so few opportunities to get fresh meat around here.” Briar grins, with a wink at Ahpin.

“You eat people?” Ahpin says incredulously.

“Honey, no, that would make such a mess.” Briar laughs. “If adventurers try to attack, we kill them and dump their bodies on the surface. And if we tire of them, we let them move on to the third level.”

The elf leans into Ahpin and drops their voice to a sultry purr. “Are you much good with a sword, sweetheart?”

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)16:08 No. 1009541 ID: eedbeb
File 163088331065.png - (186.15KB , 1000x1100 , p76.png )

While Ahpin deflects Briar’s flirting, the changelings slip silently from his bag and take cover in a narrow alleyway.

Chuck steeples his thin fingers together and furrows his brow. “Brother, it would behoove us to feed upon the elves’ mana supply while father is distracted.”

“He will be upset that we are missing, and the fields will be guarded.” Rhine chirps. He doubles over with a grunt and sprouts an extra pair of arms.

Chuck: remind Rhine that the more mana you both consume, the stronger you'll both get, and it won't matter at that point if you're both caught by the guards because you'll both be strong enough to defend yourselves with the amount of mana you'll have within the two of you. Point out the extra arms Rhine already grown from mana consumption as an example that they'll become stronger enough to defend yourselves very quickly.

also mention father will be proud of you both to be able to defend yourselves, and even him if it comes to it.

Ahpin: ask about the last adventurers they got tired of. It's probably your gf.

Children: Cutely and sneakily try to eat the elves magic, but the elves instead think you're too adorable and feed you anyway, but act indignant about it.

Elf: Offer some mana conduit lessons for Aphin so he can generate more mana to feed the babies

Vivian: Be very concerned that no one talks about all this sapient life that actually doesent seem too harmful in dungeons and that it feels more like you're invaders in someone's home then dungeon divers fighting monsters and the upcoming apocalypse

The fuck kind of pickup line is that? Look, have you seen <describe Maddie to him.>

Kids: To each according to their ability, from each according to what they leave unguarded.

You need that mana to evolve. Go get 'em.
Aphin: No, but are good with a crossbow.
Vivian: Help the situation by explaining that he's taken.

>>1009546
this, but vivian should sound real upset about this fact.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)18:40 No. 1009568 ID: eedbeb
File 163089244984.png - (191.23KB , 1000x1100 , p77.png )

“Think of the power.” Chuck clenches his little fists. “We could be like that strong spirit or these elves.”

“Have to be an egg first.” Rhine says mournfully. “Eggs get broken and sold.”

“No, we will use our powers as changelings. We are very cute, the guards will not kill us immediately and then we can escape.”

Rhine nods. The pair dart from building to building until they reach the edge of the mana fields. Rows of the same bushy mold they saw before are sliced by elves with scythes, then loaded into a machine that chews up the fungus to extract pure, glimmering mana.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)18:41 No. 1009569 ID: eedbeb
File 163089246172.png - (155.05KB , 1000x1100 , p78.png )

“I’m more of a crossbow guy, actually.” Ahpin says stiffly. “So what happened to the people from yesterday? Did they keep going?”

“Yes, well after soundly trouncing our finest fighters in the arena and refusing to participate in the subsequent rager, they insisted we show them the next staircase.” Briar sniffs. “Speaking of which, here’s where you’ll be staying.”

Briar stops at the edge of a circular pit of sand, bordered with flat rocks. A neat stone cottage with a mold roof sits nearby.

tippler 2021/09/05(Sun)18:41 No. 1009570 ID: eedbeb
File 163089247908.png - (183.74KB , 1000x1100 , p79.png )

“You’ll earn your keep by providing a spectacle tomorrow. Everything is non-lethal, and we even refrain from using magic against guests who aren’t mages.” Briar explains.

“Oh, so you weren’t hitting on me with the sword thing.” says Ahpin, relieved.

“I was very much hitting on you.”

“He has a girlfriend and he’s exclusive.” Vivian snaps.

Briar shrugs. “There’s only two beds in there, so I’ll be sleeping with one of you.”

What do Ahpin and Vivian do before they go to bed? They have to stay with Briar the whole time.
-Train
-Explore the town (get fucking wasted)
-Ask Briar questions about elf life

Try and be boring enough to have him lead you to the stairway to the next floor. Ask about elf life.

Aphin: Agree to sleep in Vivian's bed, Briar can have his own bed.
Vivian: train Aphin so you don't end up providing a spectacle on the end of a pike. And see if there's a place to buy greaves in town.

>>1009570
Ahpin: Tell Briar that this is no place for children and you refuse to let them be here.

Also Ahpin: Realize your children are missing and PANIC!!!

Vivian: Try to sleep with Aphin, but end up in a big cuddle pile

Aphin: Be very uncomfortable about this whole situation because the elf keeps grapbing your junk and you keep swatting him away.

Children: Become Mana stealing murder hobos but you dont know what murder is so you just try nibbling on people instead.

Vivian: Get wasted to get over the fact that aphin is exclusive.

Aphin: Go to bed, but notice your kids are missing the moment you wake up

I realized I suggested things for bed time and not right now. Vivian should go get drunk and drunkenly whine about how Aphin won't go on a date with her

Chuck: Begin your reign of corporatism by 'demanding' a 'loan' from a 'third-party' in the cutest ruthlessness you can muster.
Rhine: Hold your hands out. Ask for anti-mutation medicine. Pretend your brother doesn't exist.

tippler 2021/09/06(Mon)15:14 No. 1009623 ID: eedbeb
File 163096645188.png - (349.83KB , 1000x1100 , p80.png )

“Can’t you let us go to the third level now?” Ahpin asks. “We’re really very boring.”

As Ahpin says this, he turns to check on Rhine and Chuck who are very clearly nowhere to be seen.

“MY BABIES! Where are my children?!” the cat shrieks. He grabs Briar by the shoulders. “What have you done with them?”

“I dunno man, they probably slipped out while we were walking.” Briar says casually. “Changelings don’t stick in one place for too long.”

Ahpin lets go of Briar and drops to his knees. “They could be in trouble, or, or, have fallen into a ditch somewhere, we have to find them.”

“So you guys want a night out? The karaoke slash arcade serves a mean moss liquor.” Briar smirks.

“Yes please.” Vivian says.

tippler 2021/09/06(Mon)15:14 No. 1009624 ID: eedbeb
File 163096647082.png - (256.78KB , 1000x1100 , p81.png )

Rhine and Chuck inch towards the mana machine and start stuffing handfuls of the bright liquid into their mouths.

It takes maybe a minute before one of the workers notices. She cups her hand to her mouth to shout at the most official looking elf supervising at the other end of the field.

“Hey Brian! Some changelings got into the mana tank.”

“Eh? Doesn’t Dusty keep them all on level one?”

“Well clearly some got out!”

“Go get them then!”

The elf woman grumbles and advances on the changelings, who are still gorging themselves.

“Quick Rhine, emotional manipulation procedures.” Chuck hisses. Rhine swallows and gives the elf a soulful, tear-filled look with his hands outstretched. She responds by scooping him into an orange spell bubble.

“New tactics! Attack!” squeaks Chuck. He bites the elf’s leg and is captured in his own bubble.

tippler 2021/09/06(Mon)15:14 No. 1009625 ID: eedbeb
File 163096648076.png - (298.02KB , 1000x1100 , p82.png )

“Can you believe he’s going all this way for his girlfriend?” Vivian sways, downs another mouthful of green alcohol, and belches a small flame. “She must be like, the hottest girl ever.”

“Maybe he has the L-O-V-E.” Briar snickers, over his own multicolored beverage. The elf slaps Ahpin, who is sitting between them, on the back. The cat jolts, tight-lipped and pale. No one they had asked had seen the changelings.

“Love.” Vivian sighs. “Have you ever been in love, Briar?”

“Naw, but I’m still young, give me another couple centuries.”