>>17542
I am the "fair" PRNG, dubious product of OCD game design. Bell-curve enforcing, luck-disregarding.

>>17545
I am a true random number generator, luck-allowing, bell-curve-following-anyway-because-fuck-it.

>>17547
I am a glitch, RNG-breaking, system destroying.

>>17548
I am the speed-runner, glitch manipulating, game defeating.

>>17550
I am The Game, unbeatable, never-ending.

>>17552
I am short-term memory loss. Man's ultimate weapon against The Game.

>>17554
I am sticky notes, brightly colored, memory-assisting.

I am Weak Glue, resulting in sticky notes not living up to their names and falling behind or under furniture.

I am lava and I am what the floor is

>>17561
I am water, lava-spawn-destroying, obsidian-making.

>>17567
I am Ice-nine; water freezing, self-propagating.

>>17571
I am Ice 10, one level higher than Ice 9.

>>17573
I am Bill, world-heating, ice-melting.

>>17574
I am the media, propagating the stupid, biased against all other parties.

>>17575
I am the Internet. The traditional media never stop talking about how I will destroy them (between retroactively causing autism and causing the downfall of society).

I am Anonymous. Populating the Internet, making it more awesome/broken.

>>17578
I am a corrupt government, internet monitoring, anonymity compromising.

>>17579
I am Bureaucracy. Good luck wading through the forest of red tape, Mr. Mcarthy!

>>17603
I am Anarchy, order lacking, nation toppling.

>>17613
Invalid subject. Anarchy was already used by
>>17237

>>17617
Oh. Uh...
>>17603
I am a terrorist, government bombing, building toppling.

>>17620
I am failure. The bombs fizzled, the police shot first, and you got picked up at the airport. Plus, your answer was invalid. YOU LOSE.

So is that new game, or do we continue?

>>17626
Both are tempting.
I like the idea of making an Oldest Game last a thousand posts. Or at least five hundred.

New game clears the board to reuse old favorites.

I'll leave it to someone else. Don't forget to re-use the OP image (a single pixel change will do).

I am The Oldest Game. Even in the bleakest of turns, failure is always averted!

>>17650
I'm the guy who screwed it up, failure causing, game losing.

I'm a tgchan mod, and I can edit posts.

>>17652
I am the hacker. Us1ng l33t sp34k, scr3w1ng y3r w3bs1t3 f0r t3h w1n.

>>17654
I am inexplicable hardware failure, computer-destroying, money-consuming.

>>17682
I am a job, money-providing, fuck-it-just-buy-a-new-one-enabling.

>>17684
I am an economic downturn. The sector you were trying to work in no longer exists.

>>17685
I am communism. What's an economy?

>>17686
I am China. Just claim to be communist, make shitload more money than capitalists.

>>17687
I am rebellion, martyr-making, government-overthrowing.

>>17697
I am superior firepower. Rebellion suppressing, bomb spamming.

I am Mutually Assured Destruction, firepower-withholding, paranoia-inducing.

>>17716
I am strategic disarmament, convincing you to throw away your nukes, keeping some of mine behind my back.

I am North Korea, not caring bout you or your sanctions, still buildin' nukes with drug money.

I am South Korea, everyone likes us more.

I am Starcraft, bane of your people.

I am curfew, you played enough, shuttin you down right as you are about to kick your rival's ass.

>>17721
I am a lock-in, curfew-violating, fun-encouraging.

I am personal responsibility, forcing you to study calculus through the lock-in despite what you really want to do.

I am short attention span. Distracting. Forgetting your Cal-holy shiit POKEMON!!

>>17733
I am Ritalin. Focusing, personality-dampening.

>>17741
I am the pharmacist, not giving Ritalin until I see a prescription.

I am malpractice, giving treatment when it is not needed and vice versa.

I am a frivolous lawsuit, nothing is beneath me, making money off of pain and suffering.

I am an experienced lawyer, brushing aside baseless lawsuits.

I am legal fees. Talent costs money