Princess Quest: Naked snakes and horse butts Azathoth 2018/01/23(Tue)05:35 No. 860917 ID: 008b25
File 151671453430.jpg - (284.05KB , 603x821 , 2 001.jpg )

2/2

Lil: "Kinda wish you'd told me, its hard to retain dignity when your standing naked half way out of a costume horse..."

Several Dead in the small crowd fall to their knees

Dead: "Your majesty!"

Hathai: "You what?"

Lil: "Yeah im kinda a big deal, princess of the land of the dead and such."

Well that’s our cover blown. Now for the enevitable telling of your father that you where here.

huh, kinda surprised their are other undead here? the way Hathai was talking about them earlier made it seem like they're not really well liked in these parts.

Also no, I don't think the undead costume was racist I think they were just trying to make it "kid friendly", the shark dog seemed to love having a bigger sister, and you look really damn good in the Aztec(?) costume and in a suit... and thinking about it might be a fun idea to have your next disguise have a suit if you ever feel like changing it up.

"Not that big of a deal. What are the odds that daddy will permacroak this century? And then there's the five actual designated heirs above me. One of them's from-"

>>860917
And please keep it quiet, I'm trying to be incognito and explore the living lands. It is a quest for nice butts!

Play it cool, just reapply your disguise and if anyone asks, you were never here. It'd be nice if that worked... but your dad's anger at playing hooky will be totally worth it when you find your special some-butty to bring home!

Well the cat is out of the bag(or tail out of the butt) so you may as well give her the formal introduction. Who knows, it might be fun if you are giving it on your own terms... Besides, your title is very exotic, it really ought to impress.

There do seem to be rather a lot of dead people here. Does this place collect them? Or is it normal for there to be so many amongst the living... Perhaps there is a secret smuggling ring, sending and disguising tourists both ways using the "trading places" method of travel. Perhaps there was a hidden gold-mine of gluteus maximum back home, right under your nose. Perhaps you could make some subtle enquiries later? Along with assurances that they aren't in trouble...

Alternatively, they might be agents of your father. You probably don't want to say too much of your quests and plans until you have a better grasp of the situation...

>Well poop
Are the dead so short of exclamations that they need to make metabolic references?
>a Connoisseur of butts
Well it is official. Hathai would be the perfect knight to escort this princess upon her noble quest to learn of the fate of her mother, and various other ends... Too bad that she has all this famous actress stuff tying her down.

>>860917
Okay, time to properly introduce yourself. Daughter of the king of the dead and the last true dragon.

>its hard to retain dignity when your standing naked half way out of a costume horse
Well maybe you should have done less standing around naked, then! Or used a changing room, or some convenient folding screens, etc.

>Dead: "Your majesty!"
Hey loyal deadites I would appreciate it if you could keep this on the DL, thanks a bunch!

Aren't they not supposed to be here either? Let's just all forget we saw each other, okay?
I don't know how much time passed in the nightmare, but it looks like you have to apply this disguise daily from now on.
Hey Hathai, you know how I said they don't have anything like this in the land of the dead? How would you like to be the one to bring it to them?

Princess Quest Azathoth 2018/01/27(Sat)06:33 No. 862302 ID: 008b25
File 151706359950.jpg - (104.85KB , 589x402 , 2.jpg )

1/2

> they might be agents of your father

Hmm, good point actually. Your father is basically omnipotent back home but you don't know how far that extends. Its possible he could read their thoughts or something? you'll have to check up on that...

> the five actual designated heirs above me.

You never thought about that, but your mother may have had other children! you may have a brother or sister out there somewhere, hopefully there cool with a big snakey dead sister..

>you look really damn good in the Aztec(?) costume and in a suit

Not sure what the costume is for, its some sort of festival wear but the only festival it would be suitable for is one celebrating Butts and Boobs... Which you are 100 percent in favor of. The suit did look damn good didn't it, you'll have to have your tailor run a few up when you get back, maybe start a fashion trend!

Princess Quest: Secret butts Azathoth 2018/01/27(Sat)07:30 No. 862303 ID: 008b25
File 151706700762.jpg - (85.04KB , 558x406 , 2 001.jpg )

2/2

>Aren't they not supposed to be here either?

Lil: "Hey, i thought the dead where not liked here or some thing?"

Hathai: "Ech, its complicated. The ones that stay end up rich what with not having to buy food and stuff, so some people tend to hold that against them. They also tend to stick to the same neighbor hoods, so sometimes it can look like there flooding the area, tends to piss off the sort of people who are looking for reasons to be angry honestly."

You start pulling on some clothes while you talk

Lil: "Huh, interesting. Oh hey before i forget, please don't tell my father im here, im kinda sneaking out for a party here. Also tell him the titan of lust got stabbed by a swirly thing and exploded into like a thousand smoking hot ladies."

Dead: "...What?.."

Lil: "Any way some formal introductions are in order i think. I am Liik'il hat'uts kuxa'an kan baak, Princess of the land of the dead, Child of the concept of death and the last true dragon. Call me lil."

Hathai's ears perk up as she stares at you

Hathai: "Your a child of.. That explains.. Ok, you need to come with me. Theres someone you need to meet. I mean, please come with me your majesty? sorry im not that up too date on protocol or anything like that.."

>sorry im not that up too date on protocol or anything like that.."
Pssssssh you think if I cared about protocol I'd be trying to sneak around incognito. I'm just apparently terrible at it.

>Ok, you need to come with me. Theres someone you need to meet.
Are they as cool as this dressing room?

Don't forget to reapply your disguise before leaving.

sorry im not that up too date on protocol or anything like that.."
just talk to me like you were before, if you haven't guessed by now I'm really not all that big on formalities. Combination of having a pretty laid back father and it getting really freaking old after trying for a few centuries. I mean I can see some people living like that for all their lives but their is no way in hell I can believe that someone can exist with having a stick up their ass till the end of days.

Oh and don't forget to put you disguise back on before you leave... don't want to piss off some bigots if we can avoid them or have every undead drop what they're doing to swarm and bow to you. If you wanted that you'd have stayed back home.

Tell Hathai that you would love to follow her, for the view information view.

Protocol in the land of the dead is anything but 'up to date', Hathai. Just Lil is fine.
Reapply disguise and follow the sound of her hips.

Princess Butts: Quest for Butts Azathoth 2018/01/30(Tue)08:30 No. 863292 ID: 008b25
File 151732982139.jpg - (289.85KB , 607x1259 , 2 001.jpg )

1/2
(Magic roll: 6)

You quickly reapply the illusion, however this time you rather half ass it, resulting in you appearing as a pure white Chesen female

Lil: "Hmmm not what i was aiming for"

Hathai: "Eh it'll be fine, were only going next door anyway"

> follow her, for the view.

As you follow Hathai, your struck by the simple wisdom of the beings that guide you, truly they know where to behold beauty. Behold! Beauty Booty. Hah!

She leads you outside and across to a smaller building, much plainer then the Theater but just as old looking.

Princess Quest Azathoth 2018/01/30(Tue)08:34 No. 863294 ID: 008b25
File 151733008297.jpg - (230.15KB , 590x834 , 3 001.jpg )

Hathai: "This is our costume and prop warehouse, we keep em outside in case of fire, plus we get the odd collector turning up looking to buy the occasional piece, so its easier to stick them here.

She pauses and smiles at you

"Not exactly the ritzy glamour i promised, but i think you'll get a kick out of this."

She pushes open the door, revealing a rather murky space filled with boxes and sheets. The strange musty smell you sensed earlier wafts out in full force, what ever is making that oddly familiar scent must be waiting for you in the dark..

Don't tell me Strife is a patron of the fine arts?!

Not to be paranoid, Hathai certainly seems nice but... walking into a dark room with only one access point? Try leaving a hand in the door, ostensibly to steady yourself in a dark place, but if it means that the door can't easily be locked behind you then so much the better...

>>863294
Tell her you smell something in here.

Warn her not to betray you; now that the undead know who you are, they've got your trace and are distributing the frequency to all the other local undead like gossiping fishwives. If that trace were to, say, go silent or increase in amplitude from stress, every undead aristocrat in the city will hire a @#$%ing mercenary army just to make sure you're safe.

>>863294

Go on in. Hathai's been nothing but pleasant so far and I doubt we need to curse her sudden and inevitable betrayal so soon. Or possibly at all, depending on what her motives really are.

That said, there's no illusion or magics surrounding or inside this place, is there?

I thought there was someone I'm supposed to meet? Do they hide out with the old props?

>>863294
"I've suddenly got some kind of vestigial survival instinct telling me that being led alone into a suspicious warehouse immediately after telling someone I'm a princess is a bad idea for some reason."

Can I get some more hints as to what the surprise is?

>>863383
I like this, it is honest and let's the paranoia out without being explicitly insulting. Does leave Lil open to being talked into walking into a prison, but Hathai has been nothing but decent so far, even if she did augment her body specifically to attract and identify the dead and found ways of binding them eternally to her service. Not that there is a shortage of innocent explanations for her extreme figure and the high density of dead coworkers. And it isn't as though the last pretty lady friend you had was some sort of disguised monster seeking to control mortal minds.

Kidnapping Dragon Princesses? That's new. I thought it was always the dragons kidnapping the princesses.

Princess Quest Azathoth 2018/02/08(Thu)07:55 No. 865818 ID: 008b25
File 151810531346.jpg - (141.01KB , 598x501 , 2 001.jpg )

1/2

>Don't tell me Strife is a patron of the fine arts?!

Strife: No dears, im currently in the local parliament trying to give people uncomfortable thoughts about livestock, bit of a uphill climb truth be told their all surprisingly well adjusted for politicians. Toodles!

Well thats..good?

>Tell her you smell something in here.

You open your mouth to speak when your struck by the realization of exactly where you've smelt this before, it was back home, specifically the museum that houses your.. egg.. shell.. it cant be?

You quickly bury your growing fluster and make idle conversation as Hathai leads you deeper into the building.

Lil: "If your going to kidnap me i must remind you im half dragon. Wait dose that mean I should be kidnapping you? or myself?"

Hathai: "Ahh the age old problem of who to kidnap, the princess dragon or the dragon princess! Don't worry anyway, if i was trying to snatch you away id be doing it in a much more stylish manor then leading you into a warehouse."

She heads towards a doorway, light and faint musical humming pours out with a feeling of warmth. The smell is coming from just inside..

Hathai: "I simply thought that what with your parentage you two ought to meet"

Princess Quest Azathoth 2018/02/08(Thu)07:56 No. 865819 ID: 008b25
File 151810540791.jpg - (264.72KB , 806x586 , 1 001.jpg )

2/2

Hathai: "Hi daddy!"

Hathai's dad: "Oh hello kitten, what do i owe the pleasure?"

Holy shit you think he might be your brother..

Does that mean you can't hit on Hathai anymore? Drat!

>>865819
the only course of action is to launch into wave of introductions and questions stumbling over each other.

>>865819
BRUH

Ouch, you have two quests, and they are contradicting one another.
1: You seek the flesh of the living! but this would be super-awkward if you and Hathai are closely related. I don't know how that sort of thing is in the land of the dead, but in the land of the living people tend to be opposed to that. Hathai has soome of the finest flesh you have encountered and maybe you would be happier not knowing...
2: You seek the tale of your mother! If he is your brother then he must know something about her. Old lairs? People she used to know? She may have mentioned a dead daughter? Maybe she sends him regular letters with a return address!

I think that you have to pursue your mother here. There is lots of flesh in the world, but very few leads on your mother. Try not to cry if Hathai reacts badly to your being related, it might be bad for your disguise. Or maybe you should just drop the disguise completely, he might doubt your identity and your horn is very distinctive.

uhhh, should we show him our true form or hold off on that for now?

>Holy shit you think he might be your brother..
So you've been flirting with your maybe-niece. Well, maybe-half-brother, so maybe-half-niece. Are half-nieces things?

Oh well it's not like incest is a problem for the dead.

>Hathai: "Hi daddy!"
"Wow I didn't expect to reach the being introduced to parents stage in less than a day."

Princess Quest Azathoth 2018/02/20(Tue)04:41 No. 868879 ID: 008b25
File 151913051099.jpg - (210.89KB , 602x841 , 1 001.jpg )

>the only course of action is to launch into wave of introducions
> BRUH!
> uhhh, should we show him our true form or hold off on that for now?

All caution is thrown to the wind as you lunge forward, embracing your potential relative in your bony grip as your fragile illusion fades like mist

Lil: "EEEEEE Bro! This is awesome!"

Hathai's Dad: "Well she's.. friendly? you do find the strangest women dear."

Hathai: "Well she's somewhat excited, you see she says she's the daughter of the true dragon, since theres only been one true dragon that's had any intrest in making babies I thought it best to introduce you two. After all its not every day you get to reunite sib.lings.. no..Nooooo!"

Hathai falls to her knees dramatically, a cry of thwarted libido echoing through the warehouse

Hathai: "Shes my aunt! I was flirting... with my aunt.. cruel fate.. how you toy with me.."

Hdad: "Stop being so melodramatic."

Hathai: "Melodrama is a underappreciated art form and I will not be held back from furthering its reach!"

"Well it was pretty cute to watch you try, Hathai. Or should I say, niece."
You have so much to catch up with on your brother! I suppose where he's been and how come you've never heard of him is a good place to start.

>"Shes my aunt! I was flirting... with my aunt.. cruel fate.. how you toy with me.."
Why, is that a problem or something?

>Incest
Honestly, the 5,000-year age difference would be an exponentially larger problem. And both problems multiplied are still not enough for an undead to care about who they @#$%, so long as they GET to @#$% what with their reproductive organs being naturally neutered.

Besides, isn't Hathai adopted? More to the point, how can a half-dragon remain undetected, even if they seclude themselves in a warehouse? Your magic signatures are faint but unique.

If Incest is something that you know about, join her in the melodrama. That was your best flirting that has just come to nothing.

If, for some reason, someone who has apparently never been alive doesn't know about incest naturally, and nobody ever taught a princess about taboo living issues, then ask what the issue is.

Also mention the age difference, either to further the melodrama or to enquire after your mother's activities since it is one of the few dates that you can confirm.

Regardless of anything else, Hathai seems to have permanently stopped flirting: Deploy lamentation!

Look you're dead like it matters.

Also you're royalty, it matters even less. Cousins, half-nieces, big deal.

Princess quest: Bootybootybooty nowhere.. Azathoth 2018/03/28(Wed)07:55 No. 875680 ID: 008b25
File 152224890573.jpg - (206.42KB , 596x655 , 1 001.jpg )

(((Sorry for delay, life stuff, lets get this train wreck rolling!)))


>Why, is that a problem or something? >Incest
>Honestly, the 5,000-year age difference would be an exponentially larger problem.

Weeeelll, its not really whether its a problem for me, im a giant dead snake cat thing im not choosy, its whether its a problem for her. Which it is from the look of it.

>Deploy lamentation!

Don't mind if I do!

Lil: "Curse you fate! Depriving my poor niece of skeleton booty!!"

Lil: "Actually I think your like my Great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-neice or something like that, I mean the age difference alone is like 6000 years.."

Hathai: "Your not helping!"

A few minuets later your sitting around the table of a small kitchenette in the back, Hathai is making tea for the both of you while you chat with her father.

Lil: "So, tell me about yourself? are we related like what I think? I kinda assumed cause of the last true dragon thing.."

Apinya: "Well first off my name is Apinya, nice to meet you miss?"

Lil: "Liik'il hat'uts kuxa'an kan baak. Call me Lil for short"

Apinya: "..yes well, the term Last true dragon is something of a misnomer, each true dragon is so different from the others they are the first and last of their kind, even their children are changed beyond recognition from their parents, a true dragon of fire mates with a dragon of rock and births dragons of flesh, mathematics and pencil lines."

Lil: "that sounds confusing"

Apinya: "It is indeed, plus it makes the race strangely stagnant, cant move forward when the past is always changing. that's what our mother has been trying to change, breeding with mortals to mix a little of our stability with the chaos of the true dragons, least that's what she told me."

Lil: "You've met her? is she here?"

Apinya: "Oh yes, she's in the parliament building I think, but she stopped coming here many years ago, she tried her best to be a mother to me, but staying in one place is just not in her nature and eventually she left, leaping into the sky like a star."

Lil: "Did she ever talk about me at all?"

Apinya: "She did mention other children, nothing specific i'm afraid"

Lil: "oh..right.."

>how can a half-dragon remain undetected

Lil: "oh yes, how have you managed to remain here undetected? surely youd attract attention what with the whole magicky business?

Apinya smiles as he sips his tea, Hathai sitting down next him as she offers you a cup.

Apinya: "I've had some small trouble occasionally, but one painter is hardly worth the attention when there are whole nations to hate and fear, a sad fact of mortal life is that small miracles get lost in the grey normality."

Hathai: "That and everyone thinks he's just a product of a Dargenic with the old Feline Fever!"

She laughs at this, her father giving her a sideways glance over his tea.

Apinya: "The people here have odd views on such interbreeding, but not unkind ones."

You lean back on your tail ( a chair was offered but your body is a carpenters nightmare) and ponder the conversation so far, your strangley happy and sad at once to hear that your mother most likely did want to stay and see you hatched, but her wanderlust won out in the end... least your assuming that's what happened.

So what would be the next step of this half mortal true dragon race mother was planing? Hathai don't seem to inherent any visible traits. Was she planing to for her children to breed with their half siblings? Did she ever pushed Apinya toward one of his sisters?
Is Lil part of this plan? As daughter of the god of death, having already been born undead, the most unbelievable part of her origin is the half we are familiar with. How would she produce a race? Was that what Nightmare meat by failure?

>its whether its a problem for her. Which it is from the look of it.
First there was the dream illusion and sorta betrayal, now there's upset over barely incest. You're missing two for two! Who'd have thought it was this hard to get a girl.

Clearly this is a sign you should sleep with someone before getting to know her, this is where the problems keep coming up.

>>875680
She's here? Wait, didn't Nightmare tell you she was somewhere else? Maybe she's on vacation...? Anyway it almost seems like you wasted that question on Nightmare.
Also that's weird why did your mother breed with your father if she was trying to introduce stability via breeding with mortals? Your father isn't exactly mortal.
...is this a different Dragon? What do you know about your mother? What was she the Dragon of? Compare info with Apinya.

Death is rather static, it ought to result in about as much stability as you can get... and Lil promptly had a fascination with flesh and ran away from home... so failure... or maybe he was just a fling?

But, like, he has an actual location for her? Can we visit her right now? Apinya could introduce us! And surely she would want to meet a grandchild...

ask about some of those other siblings he mentioned. I mean we are just kinda wondering around aimlessly so if we could learn where your siblings are it might make a fun road trip to try and see as many as we can. It will make a fun little side quest in your quest for booty.

As for now ask him about himself, like how old is he, and what is his life like. Give him some stories about how the lands of the undead are.

I can't think of any entity more "stable" than the dead... but even the dead rot. Your were-dragon form seemed more of a representation of decay than your regular form.

In theory, a Dragon of Perpetual Decay would be a balance between the growth of life and the diminishing of death, but such things fall into pure speculation at this point.

But on to more pressing matters! What's the half-Dargenic / undead dating pool like?

Oh, I fogrot about were-dragon! It looks awesome, it would be sure to impress Hathai... What are we supposed to do with ourselves if we aren't trying to impress Hathai...

On the topic of being related, it is interesting to note that third-generation dragons aren't horned. Does Hathai have any tells that might let us identify others?