>>79749
Oh Osaka, your perception of reality never ceases to amaze.

>>79746
Lets head to the lobby, unless there is a basement. If the basement is not supposed to be readily available to the public, go there instead. Because you are a WINNER, and winners can do things like that.

CF 2009/11/20(Fri)18:24 No. 79882 ID: a69705
File 125877027936.png - (8.28KB , 600x500 , 058.png )

>>79771
You take the elevator to the ground floor, which is the lobby. But...
That isn't good enough, is it?
You want to go to a basement you're not necessarily sure exists, don't you?
YOU'RE A WINNER, AREN'T YOU?!

>>79882
Look around for a third elevator, or stairs.

>>79882

GO TO THE BASEMENT AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT

Punch through the floor of the elevator. its the only way to be sure!

>>79882
1. Use a marker to draw an extra button on the elevator's control panel
2. Write a "B" in the drawn button
3. PUSH THAT FUCKING BUTTON

CF 2009/11/20(Fri)20:23 No. 80007 ID: a69705
File 125877739316.png - (54.62KB , 600x500 , 059.png )

>>79953
YOU WANNA GET DOWN

CF 2009/11/20(Fri)20:24 No. 80010 ID: a69705
File 125877744581.jpg - (269.52KB , 600x500 , 060.jpg )

>>80007
YOU GOTTA MAKE YOUR OWN WAY DOWN

>>80010

Explore the room in a hardcore way.

Go to the lobby and complain that they have shitty elevators/escalators.

ROCK ON, COMMANDER NOTFALCON.

>>80010
SHOW THAT GODDAMN BASEMENT WHO'S BOSS
FUCK SUBTERRANEAN ALCOVES AND THEIR WICKED WAYS

Fuck yes! Strike the earth!

Suggestion 2009/11/20(Fri)23:34 No. 80226 ID: a69705
File 125878885955.png - (2.98KB , 600x500 , 061.png )

...

CF 2009/11/20(Fri)23:35 No. 80227 ID: a69705
File 125878893632.jpg - (143.27KB , 600x500 , 062.jpg )

...

CF 2009/11/20(Fri)23:37 No. 80229 ID: a69705
File 125878902260.jpg - (210.33KB , 600x500 , 063.jpg )

...the smoke and dust settle.

>>80229
Gee I wonder who's going to pay for repairs?

Investigate the area. Where the heck are we? What's in the crates?

>>80229
... do you usually do this stuff?

Look around. Lets hope some people were there to witness our awesome.

If you miss the race 'cause you dicked around too much... Do you have a watch?

CF 2009/11/21(Sat)00:01 No. 80253 ID: a69705
File 125879047552.jpg - (184.98KB , 600x500 , 064.jpg )

>>80230
Well first, what is in these crates?
Why, brochures!
Hundreds and thousands of brochures for the hotel!

>>80253
Fuck yeah, grab a couple, see what services you might not know about. But remember your mission: DESTROY THE TAPES.

CF 2009/11/21(Sat)00:30 No. 80279 ID: a69705
File 12587922359.jpg - (174.91KB , 600x500 , 065.jpg )

The brochures don't tell you much, but you grab a couple anyway. Using your previously unmentioned until now powers of BIRDSEYE VISION you can render the entire room into one mental image.

>>80279
A door? Move your manly frame through it!

what's that door there?

CF 2009/11/21(Sat)00:38 No. 80283 ID: a69705
File 125879269261.png - (13.49KB , 600x500 , 066.png )

It would appear to be an incredibly thick door, not unlike one you'd find on a bank safe or vault.
There is no obvious way to open it from this side.

>>80283
Push the circle in the middle.

CF 2009/11/21(Sat)00:49 No. 80292 ID: a69705
File 125879337382.png - (10.58KB , 600x500 , 067.png )

>>80285
That's not a button at all!

To overcome this door, you may have to think with your head.


You know, as opposed to thinking with... uh.
I got nothin'.

>>80292
>think with your head

headbutt that shit.

Turn that circle. Or push the circle.

Manipulate the circle in some meaningful fashion!

Look, who are you kidding? there's only one way into that shit.

Eagle Thrust.

>>80292
Try to push all the straight bits away from the circular bits.

Why would they lock brochures behind a vault door...?

Check underneath brochures for illegal goods/money.

>>80292
> think with your head.
HEADBUTT THE DOOR AS HARD AS YOU CAN

>>80292
Might be where the hotel stores anything the customers want stord safely. We must loot that shit.

CF 2009/11/22(Sun)02:33 No. 80734 ID: a69705
File 070.swf - (121.53KB , 600x500 )

You summon all of your power for a full frontal assault on the vault door.
[super special Flash!]

>>80734
Why are we bashing the SOLID DOOR anyway? Blast through the walls next to it, they are surely less reinforced than the vault door and likely lead to exactly the same room.

>>80734
Tug on the straight things. Rotate the round things!

>>80734
We must use a more powerful WEPON, crotch-thrust the door.

Make a fort out of the crates.

>make fort out of crates
This.

Be painfully aware of the time. WE CANNOT BE LATE. ONLY LOSERS ARE LATE.

CF 2009/12/05(Sat)00:35 No. 86126 ID: bc2956
File 12600021329.gif - (687.27KB , 600x500 , 071.gif )

You hear some creaking.

>>86126
Investigate the environment you just broke into... out...

Investigate this new environment.

>>86126
Use crates and door to make a fort.

>>86126
Demand some goddamn answers.

CF 2009/12/06(Sun)00:33 No. 86622 ID: bc2956
File 126008839577.png - (28.00KB , 600x500 , 072.png )

>>86238
>>86127
From the view from your steadfast castle, you detect this is some sort of security room. Conveniently empty - they must be well who cares they're not here so yeah.

>>86622
Oh excellent. Find the footage containing you and your shitty pants, and destroy it!

>>86623
This, but also spy on some people - especially that little wiener Gary.

God I hate him so much...

Use your imagination and turn your incredible fort into a powerful dream car and win the race.

CF 2009/12/08(Tue)04:15 No. 88178 ID: bc2956
File 126027449936.gif - (9.00KB , 600x500 , 073.gif )

>>86623
>>86624
Were it so easy.

You fucking play extreme solitaire right now.

You must win at Extreme Solitaire!

CF 2009/12/08(Tue)04:56 No. 88182 ID: bc2956
File 126027701441.gif - (25.28KB , 600x500 , 074.gif )

>>88179
>>88180
You boot up Extreme Solitare.
Four of your cards are on fire.

>>88182
Seven on burning eight, burning six on extinguished eight and seven, burning five on blazing eight seven and six.

Mess around with the OS until you stumble across video files with dates (which aren't porn).

Click Smiley to turn on Hypermode.

>>88178
Get back to the command line interface after your fun and type...

>Format C

If it gives a prompt subsequent, tell it to go ahead.

Boot up that eye thing

CF 2009/12/08(Tue)18:30 No. 88658 ID: bc2956
File 126032582230.gif - (26.79KB , 600x500 , 075.gif )

>>88187
That's the deck!
>>88213
That would appear to be the program running in the background.
>>88186
It would appear this interface was specifically designed for hotel security, with some games to alleviate boredom.
>>88184
You put the 6 on the 7, but the other cards refuse to work. They must be of different suits, though it's hard to tell - Extreme Solitare™ omits the suits for CHALLENGE POTENTIAL™. Part of its charm!

An additonal four of your cards are on fire. The first four are burning.

>>88658
Put the 10 on the J.

>>88658
If you can open up that text file there in another window, see what's in it.

Suggestion 2010/01/12(Tue)22:33 No. 110021 ID: e45568
File 126336438356.png - (9.88KB , 512x512 , finish the race.png )

Soon!?

animated CF 2010/01/16(Sat)19:18 No. 112054 ID: e45568
File 126369830616.gif - (111.96KB , 600x500 , 076.gif )

Man, fuck this game.

Wait, the Windows Hotel Monitor 95 has a WHM95.exe inside it? That's suspiciously recursive.

Click on it anyway.

>>112055
red teeeeext

>animated

Or just punch all the hard drives.

Looks like we WIN, now doesn't it?

Suggestion 2010/01/17(Sun)04:32 No. 112940 ID: e45568
File 126373152260.png - (19.25KB , 600x500 , 077.png )

>>112242
Yes! You do win, because you're A WINNER and that's what WINNERS do. They WIN.
Now, you should probably make your way out of this place before the security return. You'll want to do it as inconspicuously as possible.

>>112940
Go open that IN CASE OF FIRE cabinet behind you, because you are ON fire, you winner you.

CF 2010/01/17(Sun)05:09 No. 112944 ID: e45568
File 126373375093.png - (12.88KB , 600x500 , 078.png )

>>112943
That's the sort of logic you like.
Inside the cabinet you find an AXE, a FIRE HELMET, a FIRE EXTINGUISHER and NOVELTY GLASSES.

>>112944
Store the NOVELTY GLASSES in your pocket, wear the FIRE HELMET on top of your KICKASS RACING HELMET, and use the FIRE AXE to open the FIRE EXTINGUISHER. There is no possible way this plan will not either A) Be full of WINNING or B) Do something AWESOME.

Or we could just don the Novelty Glasses. It's a perfect disguise, after all.

>>112944
Put on the glasses, wear the fire helmet on your crotch-bulge, stab the terminal with the extinguisher, get into fortress, and throw axe at extinguisher.

Take the axe, the extinguisher, and the glasses. we have already got the best helmet ever

Suggestion 2010/01/17(Sun)18:40 No. 113534 ID: e45568
File 126378241491.png - (9.96KB , 600x500 , 079.png )

>>112948
You don the helmet.

CF 2010/01/17(Sun)18:41 No. 113535 ID: e45568
File 126378246936.png - (8.60KB , 600x500 , 080.png )

>>112977
>>112997
You don the glasses. Lookin' goooood! Not AS good as you usually do, but you know you can't improve PERFECTION.

CF 2010/01/17(Sun)18:41 No. 113537 ID: e45568
File 126378251444.png - (10.59KB , 600x500 , 081.png )

>>113006
With Axe and Extinguisher in tow, you're ready to leave this dungeon. So long, fort!

Kick that door in and burst through in an ACTION POSE

CF 2010/01/18(Mon)00:08 No. 113826 ID: e45568
File 126380208959.png - (12.85KB , 600x500 , 082.png )

>>113541
AWW YEAH
THE AXEMAN COMETH
YOU WANNA AXE ME A QUEST--

CF 2010/01/18(Mon)00:09 No. 113828 ID: e45568
File 126380215535.png - (14.16KB , 600x500 , 083.png )

--ion?
Outside of the room a crowd of hotel goers and some staff appear to have gathered, probably drawn by that whole explosion nonsense.

BEST THINK FAST

DANCE A SOFTSHOE!
Use the axe as a cane.

Yell "NINJA VANISH!" and chop the fire extinguisher open with your axe.

>>113845
Also run away quickly while the crowd is blinded.

>>113828
Tell them you're here because you heard there was a fire.
Pause dramatically.
Say, "Or maybe it's just me."

Then rip off your shirt, find the nearest girl in the crowd, and begin giving her a lap dance while supplying your own techno music with your mouth.

UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ

>>113845

This is the only reasonable course of action.

It's not like they can recognize you anyway.

>>113928
This is the only reasonable course of action. It simly cannot fail, because failure is for losers and you're a winner!

Run through that crowd, straight through them

Seeing this thread in the active list made this the best day of my life.

Shame them with your clearly more impressive musculature. Then hose them with the fire extinguisher.

Scream like a girl and run onward.

MOVE ASIDE, MORTALS

CF 2011/10/06(Thu)03:53 No. 356305 ID: c8775c
File 131789838574.png - (12.24KB , 600x500 , 080.png )

You decide the easiest way out of this situation is to SPRAY AND RUN GO GO GO

EAT IT LOSERS

In your haste, you forget whatever it is you're doing down here.

>>356305
You were busting out of a vault or something. But man, the race! We have to get there and make sure it hasn't started yet.

Consume some of the extinguishing agent.

if you can't remember it, it wasn't important. use the extinguisher like a skateboard and ponder what kind of diet you've taken to reduce in size so considerably in the last minute.

>>356323

The Special Jim Davis Diet Programme¡

CF 2011/10/06(Thu)08:45 No. 356339 ID: c8775c
File 131791592402.png - (9.31KB , 600x500 , 081.png )

>>356323
Winners don't diet! What a silly notion.

>>356307
You quickly consume some extinguishing agent to kill the burning fires of... whatever who cares.

It's minty fresh!

Times like these you're taken back to your childhood, when you once dreamed of being fire. Why? Some men just want to watch the world burn.

Winners want to be the fire.

>>356339
Anyone who doesn't want to be a winner must be crazy. Now lets go and get that medal from the race, since you already won it.

in any case winners dont do drugs

you are now ready for your date

>>356373

You mean the The Future Zertan-Egrid Race (Official), or a date with a photo of himself. I say do both. Simultaneously, if need be.