so you can somewhat see things, what do you hear?

All I see up ahead are rocks.

Go check out the rocks.

>>669557
You realize you're never gonna get that out of your mind now.

Explore cave. If you can't see the whole thing at one, make a lap of the periphery, following the wall. That should let you map out what's there.

how old do hobgoblins get?

Admit to yourself that you have a GMILF fetish.

Run recklessly into the cave, maybe you'll get lucky and a monster will attack you and drive the image of your grandmother's surprisingly perky tits out of your head.

>>669557
Welp, you've already succumbed to adventuring madness. Drink the other potion. Accept your doom.

Drink the other potion! you only live once!

Stop thinking grandma juicy tits, and pay attention to your surroundings.

Have yourself a wank. Hopefully that'll get rid of the potion's effects.

Gren 2015/09/20(Sun)06:33 No. 670816 ID: 265534
File 144275602892.png - (204.78KB , 411x546 , 16.png )

>how old do hobgoblins get?

"When Ghabrinax created goblins, he looked upon the works of the other Gods and said, "Those things are fucking stupid. My shit's going to be way better." And lo, he did make goblins never age past the prime of their lives, so they could serve him to their fullest, then he gave them very little common sense or survival instinct, so they end up dead a lot anyway. Good job, Ghabrinax, ya fucked us." - The Mirgkarm, goblin holy book

Gren realizes that a lot of goblins fall prey to this weakness and die, so he's careful about not doing anything reckless.

Gren drinks the second bottle of unidentified liquid he found on the floor and suddenly cannot see anymore.

>>670816
So are we, like, 1000 years old?

sweet a hair growing tonic... wait a minute, who's dungeon are we raiding anyways? I mean first the boner potion, now the hair growing tonic, is this a dungeon of some kind of perverted old wizard or something who just keep losing all his crap because of Alzheimer's or something?

Uh, hopefully that's just because of the hair in front of your eyes. Brush it back.

>>670816
You beautiful now.

maybe we should stop drinking things.

>>670816
start a metal band

>>670816
These semi-useless potions are actually a good sign! If they originated from these ruins, then this was a place that people with plenty of disposable income lived.

Also, tie back your hair, don't saw it off. If those other adventurers get through a heap of still-oily black goblin hair will be a dead giveaway that you're already in.

Gren 2015/09/20(Sun)13:19 No. 670952 ID: 265534
File 144278039590.png - (286.93KB , 1024x768 , 17.png )

>So are we, like, 1000 years old?

More like seventeen, which by human standards is the same as being early twenty something... Why do humans get to make all the standards anyway? The important thing is that he can buy booze legitimately, which is terrible and takes a lot of the fun out of it. Raise the legal drinking age for the rapidly maturing races! It's unfair to deprive them of the thrill of underage drinking just because they're adults. Anyway... Getting to one hundred years is quite the feat for most gobinoids, it just doesn't happen very often.

>that's just because of the hair in front of your eyes

That's lucky. Being blind in a cave while being chased by a gang of adventurers would be inconvenient, even more inconvenient than having this mess of hair.

>start a metal band

My hair is fabulous and I'm horny as hell. I could get all those groupies, but I'm gonna have to cut this off.

>don't saw it off. If those other adventurers get through a heap of still-oily black goblin hair will be a dead giveaway that you're already in

Urgh... Fine.

there's a lot of water pour down this tunnel. Is this place near a lake?

>It's unfair to deprive them of the thrill of underage drinking just because they're adults.
But you just complained about humans setting all the standards. And speaking as a hypothetical human, I think you (and your grandmother!) are both very fortunate for that miracle of biology.

>>670952
So are you gonna search this cave for stuff or what.

Gren 2015/09/23(Wed)21:30 No. 672168 ID: 265534
File 144306899618.png - (390.83KB , 721x746 , 18.png )

Suddenly, something cold and wet splats on Gren's head. Gross.

Ah, just the cold shower you needed to clear your mind! Don't swallow it.

headbang!

Stick your dick in it.

Is it acidic? Better wipe it off before you find out the hard way... or before it smothers you.

>>672168
Well, that's not water, or it would have come off by now. You don't claw at water.

So... the good possibility is you now have a slime stuck to your face. The bad possibility is that's a sticky glob of giant monster drool, and there's something way more dangerous than a slime above you.

>>672171
seconded

>>672171
could there really be any other solution?

Gren 2015/09/27(Sun)08:58 No. 673155 ID: 265534
File 144336952323.png - (235.39KB , 680x515 , 19.png )

>headbang
>wipe it off

Gren furiously flails, launching the slime onto the floor.

URGH! Git off, fucker!

Gren 2015/09/27(Sun)08:59 No. 673156 ID: 265534
File 144336957872.png - (170.17KB , 700x525 , 20.png )

Okay, this is annoying. Fuck off with all this hair. I'll kick it behind a rock or something so the others don't notice.

Gren 2015/09/27(Sun)09:07 No. 673157 ID: 265534
File 144337006412.png - (251.97KB , 883x533 , 21.png )

Once his head is removed of all extra baggage, Gren assesses the situation.

>is it acidic

Face is still intact, so it's probably not too dangerous.

>is it a slime or monster drool?

It's reforming into a blob. It's a slime.

>stick your dick in it.

What? That's crazy...

>seconded

I could at least find a sexier monster for this kind of thing...

>could there really be any other solution?

I have people behind me, I should probably keep moving so I don't get caught. Who knows how long it'll take them to bash down that door... Maybe long enough to...

commune with it.



via dick.

Keep moving and look up from time to time. If that slime surprised you then it will probably do the same to the adventurer party behind giving you some warning if the come down this path... Or at least slow them down.

acquire pet blob

Stick it back on the ceiling so it can fall on some other guys face.

>>673156
Just cutting your hair won't reserve the effects of the potion of gender change, you know.

>>673157
Can't we... just walk past it? Leave the slime for the other adventures to deal with. Let monsters slow them down, instead of getting to stroll through a cleared area while you do everything the hard way.

Drape hair cuttings over it. Maybe they'll think it's some kind of unique or powerful slime.

give cut hair to ooze, it seemed to like your head maybe it will be happy

Give it a wig of cut hair, then kick it down the passage behind you.

>>673163
>>673164
We can do both, stuff it down your pants and get running. Don't think of sticking your dick in the slime as having sex with it, think of it as dealing with that unfortunate potion effect in a more hands-free way.

Feed it some mushrooms and get it to develop bioluminescence.

Gren 2015/09/29(Tue)08:22 No. 673702 ID: 265534
File 144354012845.png - (135.85KB , 625x424 , 22.png )

>look up

Oh good. There's a bunch. Good think I checked.

>Feed it some mushrooms and get it to develop bioluminescence.

How.

Well, you'll need some glowing mushrooms first, so get searching.

Can you cram some of that slime in your used potion bottle?

Stick your dick in the ceiling.

move one and avoid walking under those things. Also make sure you look down every now and then as well so you don't fall in a hole or something.

>>673702
They're coming from cracks in the ceiling. There's probably a giant slime on the floor above you. Try not to let it reform enough down here to be dangerous.

>>673702
Carefully sneak across the room, not walking under any slimes.

Assess hair. Does it look sufficiently cute now?

Put a some of the slime in one of the empty bottles.