Alright. Know any martial arts?

What are the rules of the Fight?

Develop Nose Fu to use your pointy nose to its best advantage.

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/07(Fri)13:10 No. 174665 ID: 7133d6
File 127326305282.png - (12.34KB , 500x500 , 2.png )

>>174662
The Fight is an underground Mondo City tradition, where the best fighters around gather and go bare knuckle fighting. There are no rules of the fight, some people even bring weapons.
>>174660
I don't know any. I play a lot of street fighter and tekken though.

>>174665
Poison him before the fight so he'll be nearly dead in the ring, then shoot him.

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/07(Fri)14:02 No. 174674 ID: 7133d6
File 127326613426.png - (10.77KB , 500x500 , 3.png )

>>174667
What?! No! There is no honor in that! I must learn how to fight true, and be the Fight Champion!

>>174674
Well, you've got a long way to go. At least you're young. Your body is still developing, so training should produce results in a matter of months. Learning proper fighting techniques will be harder. That will take years.

Unless... we find a shortcut. Forbidden tomes of power or stealing the memories of other martial artists. Or you could even somehow download the fighting moves of those dudes in your video game. Granted their fighting style may not actually WORK in real life...

Of course all this will be pointless if someone decides to have no honor and win with a gun or something. No martial artist can stand up to a gun, no matter how strong. Surely they have rules to prevent that, at least?

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/07(Fri)15:37 No. 174703 ID: 7133d6
File 127327185783.png - (13.53KB , 500x500 , 4.png )

>>174676
Nah guns shouldn't be a problem! I once saw a guy kick a bullet back at a dude at The Fight!

>RED BELT OF TRAINING EQUIPPED

I hear there are a few ways to train up! I could:

A. Lift Weights at the Mondo Muscletorium
B. Join a local fight club
C. Buy fighting style instruction videos
D. Or whatever else works!

the weights and videos would be a good start. trying to join the local group with NO skills already is just asking for trouble. probably gotta fight someone to join.

>>174703
You don't talk about fight club.

Also, go there, do that.

You need to GET PROTIEN to BUILD MUSCLE FASTER.

EAT A DOZEN EGGS RAWWWWW.

>>174703
LIFT SO MANY WEIGHTS

>>174703
Eat a dozen raw eggs, then go to the fight club and challenge people there to fights to the death. It's the fastest way to gain strength and power.

hey what is this quest called

>>174885
Meat Bone Quest

"Johnny Duder's Ultimate Journey", word from the author, Aon.

Find a video with information on the strange and unpredictable Nose Karate combat style, and memorize everything in it. You have the best combat nose I have ever seen, kid. Don't put it to waste.

>>174913
indeed, are you capable of opening cans with it?

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/08(Sat)11:04 No. 175028 ID: 042a0b
File 127334185415.png - (10.21KB , 500x500 , 5.png )

>>174708
>>174878
Yes! Raw Eggs! The true source of Fighting Spirit!

>Johnny has entered DUDER KITCHEN

We only have one egg though. Behold.

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/08(Sat)11:04 No. 175029 ID: 042a0b
File 127334189153.png - (11.14KB , 500x500 , 6.png )

>>175028
Here I go..

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/08(Sat)11:06 No. 175034 ID: 042a0b
File 12733419757.png - (9.26KB , 500x500 , 7.png )

>>175029
!!!

Yes! I feel it! The power of the egg is coursing through my body!

>STR +1
>EGG-FU STYLE +2

>>175034
No, that's salmonella your feeling

>>175034
What other foods do you have in the kitchen? RED MEAT is good too.

>>175041
If it's salmonella, then we need to skip to step 7 - drink a bottle of bleach to toughen your body up.

>>175034
HEY

That was only one egg.

WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF THE CARTON?

GET ALL DAT EGGY PROTEIN, GO JOHNNY GO!

Then go to gym and MUSCLE IT UP

At that point, you should have enough Egg fu ability and strength to at least have a decent starting point.

Too much raw egg will only make him throw up and lose strength. He only had one egg anyway.

Anyway, the man needs MEAT! Meat to eat to put on his bones to grow muscles on! Then some hard-ass training in the Muscletorium!

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/08(Sat)12:21 No. 175055 ID: 042a0b
File 127334649563.png - (12.82KB , 500x500 , 8.png )

>>175053
>>175045
Yeah! More food should give me some energy to burn! My mom is out getting groceries so we don't have a ton to eat. This is what there is worth eating. I'm not that hungry, so pick only two, guys.

An Apple
Some Carrots
Leftover Chicken Nuggets
Fatty Snackage Cake
FFF Flakes
Yum Chips Original

>>175055
Fatty Snackage Cake and the FFF Flakes

>>175055
Apple and carrots. VITAMINS!

>>175071

Tasty AND good for you. Down the hatch with 'em!

Agreed on the apple and carrots.

Bah! If he is to get strong, he needs protein. Eat the meat, it helps build muscles. And the carrots I guess. Those are good.

Skip this muscle building crap and get some steroids

the sleazy, sweaty giant at the gym should be able to hook you up

>>175336
Yeah, your method will work, faster even. But it comes at a STEEP PRICE. I think the best way is to stay HONORABLE and win through INNER STRENGTH.

strength will only get you so far. while fooding up is a great idea, definately join the fight club. you will get stomped regularly, but you will also learn things and get experience in fighting.

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/09(Sun)17:27 No. 175653 ID: b3a969
File 12734512797.png - (11.70KB , 500x500 , 9.png )

>>175071
>>175089
>>175135

The carrots and apple were crisp and fresh! Wonderful!

>STAM +3
>MAXIMUM HIPPIE STYLE +8

okay, now that we are full of food let's head out to the gym.

while you train make sure you have 'eye of the tiger' playing, it should give you a boost.

>>175665
and push it to the limit from scarface's soundtrack

>>175669
Get a whole training montage playlist going.

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/10(Mon)13:30 No. 175870 ID: fdcac6
File 12735234261.png - (13.63KB , 500x500 , 10.png )

>>175665
>>175669
>>175674
Yeah! Sounds good! I updated my mp3 player!
>ODE TO MUSCLE STYLE +6
and make my way to the gym. Should I make any stops on the way there?

Nah just punch a mailbox and see if you dent it.

>>175870
Where is there to stop?

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/23(Sun)13:19 No. 181897 ID: dc1ba0
File 127464599447.png - (14.52KB , 500x500 , 11.png )

>>175871

>KADUNK
Yeah! Awesome!
>PONY EXPRESS STYLE +4
>"Hey! What do you think you're doing?!"

Jonathan!sPnHW1P2IY 2010/05/23(Sun)13:21 No. 181898 ID: dc1ba0
File 127464606193.png - (13.80KB , 500x500 , 12.png )

>>181897
Aw crud. It's the postman.

>"You better have a good reason for dentin' my mailboxes, boy."

Technically mailboxes are property of the post office, which is part of the federal government. Therefore, if you destroy a mailbox it's a federal crime.
(+3 Felon Style)

Ensure the postman that you are training in the most impulsive manner possible and thus are a danger to everyone and everything around you including him. Challenge him to a fight. I'LL TAKE YOU ON! I'LL TAKE YOU ALL ON!

I'm training for ter FIGHT 'ya big mail boxer! Don't get in my way unless you are wantin' to FIGHT!