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4788 No. 4788 ID: 5eea01

So, seeing as this is my first real attempt at writing a story that sort of makes sense AND making any sort of art, I would very much like to hear feedback on what you like or dislike about my rather amateurish quest, as well as what you think I'm doing wrong.

Fire away!
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No. 4789 ID: 954933

I actually just gave it a read-through away and am enjoying it. The art style is pretty cute. I've got no other feedback at the moment, other than to keep up the good work.
No. 4821 ID: 9891a9

Definitely loving the "network" theme of this quest, the simplistic character design works well for the setting, and the bland rooms have a reason for lack of detail, which likely saves time both in your creation of and our analyzing of the images. It's a bit short and doesn't seem to have a clear focus yet, but I'm hoping for some excellent development in the near future.
No. 12222 ID: 5eea01

I finally decided to dig up this old thread for feedback and/or voting purposes. If you have anything to swear at me for, do it here.

First vote: Johnny or Bartholomew?
No. 12226 ID: c9eb99

Consider this a vote for Johnny
No. 12227 ID: 3b6c92

Uhh, Bartholomew, I guess?
No. 12229 ID: 5eea01
File 126816012131.png - (16.14KB , 800x600 , DressedUp.png )

[[I realize I should have explained further in case people see the feedback thread first. The one on the left is already named Nicky, the one on the right needs a name. Suggested so far have been Johnny (Five) and Bart(holomew), but you can make your own suggestions.]]
No. 12234 ID: 197650

No. 12244 ID: 126a73

Bart's a good enough name, methinks.
No. 12262 ID: c0f3bf

Bartholomew is most excellent.
No. 12279 ID: 5eea01

Bartholomew it is. Voting closed.
No. 12281 ID: 61d96f

how meta would it be to tell Tycho that i have a degree in computer/networking repair and maintenance? (i really do have one, it's framed and on my wall.)
No. 12282 ID: 5eea01

That would only matter if the Grid worked like the Internet or modern computing in general. It doesn't. But yeah, that'd be weird.
No. 13157 ID: 1ac39d

i finally figured it out! gridlock is like the RPG segments of Mr. Robot!
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