>>97733
Sounds almost like a trickster's hand is at work here. Buuut I dunno.

Grin at her anyway. Then say "Ah, then I must even the field." Take off your something. Coat?

>>97744
I slip off my cape and coat, dropping them by the side of the ring. Just as I turn around, she lunges at me, and my own arm lifts in self-defense, clacking off her stick, sliding down her arm, into the sleeve... and out the other one, with a loud tearing sound. She lets out a little gasp again, but the blouse is only torn along her back, not the collar.

I'm thinking Anansi might be involved in this. Or Raven. I don't know. She lunges again, this time the stick slides under my sleeve and through my collar, tearing a long rip and making it hang on one shoulder.

She dances away, a wide smile on her face, eyes glittering in anticipation as her tail flicks at the air behind her.

>>97748
Alright, advance carefully and start testing her defenses, then gradually pick up the pace again. Try to move in for a grapple at some point. It might be time to try for that second kiss.

ooooor, she could be doing it on purpose.

>>97754
>>97756
I move in slowly but unstoppably, testing her defenses in various areas. It soon becomes clear where her weakest point is, which is to say, the center of her gaurd. She is good at stopping and pushing aside blows, but not stopping them outright.
Thus I slip in close and slam past her defenses, the stick sliding past her neck to catch on the remains of the collar of her blouse, ripping loudly as I push forth. Without the support around her neck, the ruined garment falls down to hang on her hips, short clean white hair glistening in the night as a shiver runs down her body as her ears droop to the sides of her head. I move in now, kissing her lips again, holding her close against me.

...

We part as she gasps, hiding herself absent mindedly. And then I see the scars I never saw in the spring, even wearing the monocle. Long, snaking pink scars adorn her chest, belly, and sides, probably her back as well. She notices when I see them and smiles, lifting her hands to stretch as she takes in a deep breath. The effect is quite flattering.
"My instructor never believed in practice blades." Ella murmurs softly.

>>97828
Nice. I approve.

Ask her what her training was like, while inspecting her scars. Ask her if any of them still hurt; you could do something about that I imagine.

>>97839
"Do any of those hurt?" I ask, hugging her from behind, my hands on her belly while I rest me head on her shoulder.
"No. Except in strange weather. They are very old, and only look bad." she takes a deep breath, and leans against me slightly, her hands sliding up behind my neck as she looks to the northeast.

Her eyes narrow.

"Hattori... do you see anything on the horizon?"

>>97841
Check it out. Could you try using the hat as a spyglass?

>>97842
Not with Ella around. I peer over her shoulder and.. ah! I do see something.

Or, rather, a lot of somethings. Little points of flickering light, large triangular shadows, smaller moving shadows. Something seems wrong... I hand Ella my coat and tell her to get to the inn.
"Wha-"
"Please, Ella. Trust me."
"A-all right."

Also use the monocle.

USE THE HAT TO TELE-


I kid. You ought to inform the town guard though. They might know more about what it could be, and they could buy you time to run in a heroic last stand. Do this after using the hat as a looking glass and trying the monocle.

>>97868
I pull out my eye, carefully, and unfasten my ear. While the sensory organs are in my head the ear is still connected to them psuedomagically, much like the eye to my optical nerve.
Using the hat to send my hand, holding both, over the camp, I observe what I feared.

A large force of mongrels, easily twice if not three times the size of the group at Raven's Loft. Three stand out in particular.

The first I notice is old, leaning on a long, warped stick. A small human skull hangs from it, joined with a Seeran skull, an Ogre's horn, and a shriveled square of heartwood from a Chloronoid. His free hand is warped like the staff, heavily mutated, a haze of magic hanging around it ominously.

Beside the older mongrel sits a taller, stronger one with white hair and glowing red eyes. It has wide shoulders, and longer than usual hair. Some of this is braided, and the braids end in decorations much like the one that hang from the older one's cane. Only he has kobold, dwarf, and elf skulls as well, and a young dragon's skull serves as a helmet. On his hips rest two axes, huge and serrated and as savage as his own face. He is easily taller than most of the tents.

The third is the most disturbing. Lean as bone and in between the other two in terms of height, he is armed with two long cleavers, and both glow softly with power. This is frightening: An enchant,ent on a weapon is not usually noticable. For it to glow like this, it has to be something... dangerous. But even worse are his features. Slightly warped in every facet, one eye a bright gold and the other a dull blue, his snout turning upwards oddly, one ear longer than the other, a horn protruding oddly from where his shoulder meets his neck. His shoulders are knotted like old oak, his hands facing the wrong way, with longer claws than apparently normal,as scars on his palms indicate.
And on his left breast is deep, black scar, of a mask, split into smiling laughter and frowning tears.

The symbol of the Clown.

>>98048
The one with the clown scar walks aways and the other two converse.
"I do not trust him." the one with the staff says. He is... wrong. Clown destroyed the Father. He may betray us."
"The Clown has as much stake in this coup as any of us. And besides, there is no worry. I doubt even a Lawsworn could stand alone against this force... and the next, and the next. If he dares to turn on us, he has no one to turn to but his wretched god."
The one with the staff nods.
"Still. He is worrying me."

I remove my organs from the hat, put them back, and rush back to town, grabbing the first guard I come across.
"I need to see Luitenent Arryn!" I shout. "There is an incoming assault! Send up the alarm immediately!"

The gurad looks at me, shaken, then runs back, calling for his higher-ups. Why...
Oh.

I pick up my ear and restitch it on.

A beautiful woman approaches, in full plate armor, lightly glowing. A scar like a cross sits over one eye.
"What is it, surgeon?" she asks, irritated.

Argh, looks like Clown thought it would be funny to help Coyote out a little. We probably shouldn't worry about him in the long term though. He may even decide to help us out at one point. Start loading the hat with bolts and rocks and shit. We can take out most of that army with a big enough payload.

There's no way to guess what the mongrel heroes' powers are, but the Clownsworn is probably just as dangerous to its allies as it is to us. Anyway, we're going to be in a city with fortifications so we shouldn't be in much danger, really. The force they have is really kinda small to be assaulting a city, but I guess they're counting on the three big guys to break through defenses.

Okay, looks like the town guard has a lawsworn on their side! Tell her that there is an army approaching the city, with a clownsworn among their ranks... alongside two other notable foes that she would have to see to believe. Demonstrate with the hat why you were able to know this.

>>98057
"We have a full army of mongrelmen about a league from your north gate. There are three sworn among them."

"Mongrels?"

"As in the sons of Coyote."

Her face goes even paler than before, her scar standing out bright pink, the eye it covers turning into a sphere of light.

"How dare he. How dare he! He does not even follow the laws of life and death!" She gives me a harsh glare. "Thank you for bringing me this information. Get the hell out of my sight, and if I see you on the feild without a uniform on, I will personally take your eyes." she whispers, leaning close. "I am wed to none but the Incarnate now. Do not think you can claim me again."
With that, she walks off, shouting orders.

>>98118
What?! Hattori, you were married to her? Sounds like it was a messy divorce.

I would suggest getting a uniform, because she's gonna need the help. I would suggest bringing a Seeran along to help against the casters but it would fuck up Arryn's abilities and armor, probably. You and her should be enough.

>>98127
>You and her should be enough
I SAW that.

Yes, I will find a uniform.

As to me and Arryn... we were a very strange couple. Whenever we would meet, we would fight, because of what I was. I defied nature's Law... But always, those fights would end in the same thing. Eventually, we decided to make it official... which ruined whatever spark there was between us.

As for her abilities, she can force people to tell the truth, and she can use luck offensively. She can alwaysseem to just manage to land lucky blows, just manage to block that surprise assault... And so on.

I bribe my way into a pair of pants and a uniform suit of armor.

Should I fetch any friends before I go out?

>>98137
I guess a Seeran wouldn't mess up her luck ability; it's too subtle. Check the watch on everyone before we decide.

Do you know anything about the abilities of the archers of this town? Another bow can't hurt the defense, and should be far enough away to not mess with magic. I say take Ella and Shi, have Ella find a good vantage point to provide supporting fire with her bow, preferably far enough away so as to keep her from suppressing magic (it does have a distance limit, yes?). Check Jax's life with the watch, if it's flickering under one day, then keep him back. Tell him to guard the town or something.

If you can't find them within a few minutes of finding Ella (who's location we basically know) then it's not worth it. Time is critical.

>>98158
>>check the watch on everyone

Also this.

>>98324
I manage to find Ella quickly, who has changed into new clothes. She's found the others, who are waiting for me in the inn. Gerald's large form dominates the room, his back brushing against the ceiling and rafters as he leans over.

I quickly tell them the situation, and each of them nod. Gerald leaves first, clearly knowing his own position on the field. Shi walks past me, kissing my cheek and whispering "Too bad..." into my ear with low tones.
Er...
Ella nods at my instruction to support from above, But as I check his time on the watch, he reaches out and snaps it shut.
"Do that again and I will toss the damn thing in a lake to freeze. You are becoming reliant upon it, and I can tell what it does. Do not let it make your decisions for you."
I nod.
"I will be speaking with Arryn as to where she wishes to place me. May we meet after the battle, Hattori." he said with a smile.

That leaves myself.
Should I support from afar? Or should I use my nigh-invulnerability to target the Fangsworn?

>>98602
Nigh invulnerability.

Also, I'm assuming it was Jax who was chiding you about the watch?

>>98714
Very well. I shall wade into the thick of them, using Crowd Gasper (the lesser version of Show Stopper) to handle the lesser enemies.

As for Jax, yes, he was the one who insisted I cease using the watch so flagrantly. I admit I see his point somewhat.

I load the hat with the bolts, stones, and, in a last minute inspiration, I empty the barrel of oil inside. If they wear any armor...

At any rate, do you have any more advice before I move into battle?

What? but... my toy!

I guess it was being overused. I was starting to realize that it isn't really useful for gauging risk anyway since we're pretty much constantly in danger now. When death is around every corner, knowing exactly when it's possible to die doesn't help a lot, and it says nothing about injury. It looks like it was giving us the most useful information when we used it when we thought we were safe, not when we thought we were in danger, so as to detect hidden threats... although it did help a little one time because the specific time of death could be linked to a certain course of action. Right now there's no point. I bet no matter who we took, there would be a chance of them dying.

I do think that the watch is still useful, and it is basically a free source of information. Knowing when to use it is the issue, so we don't wind up looking at it all the damn time. I admit that losing Sa'lan due to not using the watch led to me obsessing over it. I swore I wouldn't let it happen again. Damn you, Coyote...

I've got an idea for a new Hat Trick. If while fighting in this pitched battle you decide to absorb an enemy's attack using the hat, try to imagine a spot behind that enemy for the destination. Make him stab himself. Or even someone else, if you're so inclined. You may even be able to use it to parry an additional attack! That could be tricky of course.

>>99370
>I've got an idea for a new Hat Trick. If while fighting in this pitched battle you decide to absorb an enemy's attack using the hat, try to imagine a spot behind that enemy for the destination. Make him stab himself. Or even someone else, if you're so inclined. You may even be able to use it to parry an additional attack! That could be tricky of course.

It.... yes, that could work!

Hat trick discovered!
HAT TRICK: CUNNING TURNABOUT!
The unfortunate thing about this attack is that it would only work for thrusting attacks. Axes and maces, as wel as most curved blades, would foil it.

And I heartedly agree. The watch is specific, but not all that helpful. When only one or two options were present, yes, but now that there are multiple people in the party as well as multiple threats against me...

It does however, keep absolutley perfect time.

Even in areas where time is slowed, in which cases, it heats up, and areas of prolapsed time, in which case, it cools. I discovered this while I was on the town, after walking through such zones generated by a charlatan magician group.

I walk out to the north gate, and see most of the standing gaurd prepared and in formation, with the exception of Arryn, Ella, Jax, and Gerald. Gerald is himself covered in thicker wood and bark than normal, and tied to each of his hand-vines s a wickedly long, curving blade with a point. I do not see Shi anywhere.

Hattori, do me a favor, will you? Find out what happens if you thrust the cane at something. Say a creature's chest. I mean, if it makes the Earth quake, it might do something cool to them.

>>99658
Only the earth and terrain is effected by my cane. If I were facing, say, an earth eleental or a stonegolem, I imagine it would absolutly horrible effects, especially localized...

Hurrrm... I wonder. Maybe after this I should find a boulder or something...

Anything else?

>>99791
The earth begins to rumble and shake, and I look up to see the enemy charging at us. Gerald braces himself, while two others of his kind, noticabley thinner and brighter in coloration, punch the earth.
A palisade of green and brown thornbushes erupts from the earth, and the enemy army slams into it, as Gerald steps over and whips his vines through them. Halves of mongrel fly everywhere, raining down gore as Gerald roars, a rumbling, crackling sound. The heroes appear to be holding back.

>>100063
How localized is the cane's earthquake? Could you, for instance, reach through with the hat and tap it near the back lines so it won't affect your allies?

>>100082
I reach through and...

HAT TRICK: STANDING OVATION

The earth rumbles, and with four taps, the main force and the heroes are seperated by a huge chasm.... that narrowly misses the town. Gerald takes the initiative and sweepsa large portion of the enemy army into it, then steps aside as the brair patch opens, allowing Arryn and her men to finish the wounded.

RAVEN IS AMUSED!

>>100097
This battle is far from over. Be prepared. The heroes might be able to jump over the chasm.

>>100097
The leaders are still active, though. I think you should lead the assault against them. Test their abilities on your durable body. Be prepared to block fireballs or whatever from the two mages using the hat. Hey, I have an idea. Arryn has luck on her side, so if SHE uses the hat to expel its contents, perhaps the fangsworn will be unable to dodge.

>>100123
Arryn walks to the edge of the chasm, closing her eyes. She draws her blade, and... steps out?!


FAITH'S FETTERS!
Light appears under her feet, forming a bridge. Rocks and earth are pulled from the sides of the chasm, sliding into place and fitting to form a bridge. She opens her eyes, and points her sword at the ClownSworn, who laughs and leaps onto the new bridge, which is by now made of pure stone and rooted well into place.

Out of nowhere, a blade appears of shimmering and prismatic colors, in the Clownsworn's hand. He holds it aloft, and light shines over the whole area, even the city itself.

MADNESS OF THE CLOWN!

!!!

I hear laughter behind me, and turn to hear the unsheathing of blades as Arryn and the Clownsworn fight. The other two heroes walk past them over the bridge slowly.

"No!" Arryn growls. "Atoinette, Fiona!"
The bright chloronoids slam their hands into the earth again, only for one to wilt and turn brown, crumbling, and the other to lose an arm. The heroes are here.

Where is Ella?! Where is Jax?! They were right with me, just now!

>>100142
Before I can do much more, however, a roar shatters the skies.
Wait. I've heard that before! Isend the cane through the hat and tap the stone bridge three times, then, pull the cane in and...

"I need to go forward!" I mumble, and the cufflinks shine. A blast of enourmous kinetic force barrels me forward, catching Arryn and sending us onto the other side. We land, panting as the three sworn Do the same on the other side. The old one rises just in time for his head to be sent flying by Gerald's vineblade.
But the hulking one defends himself, using the wide area of the axeheads like sheilds, fending off six seperate assaults at once, the pulsation of magic registering as Coyote's luck only three times out of, as I count, twelve.

The roar shatter the sky again. It seems like Gerald's assault is wavering, and the Clownsworn won't stop staring at me.

>>100240
Damage check. Once your done with that, Ask why the Clownsworn finds you so interesting.

>>100259
Three broken ribs, which do not matter in the slightest.

"Why do you find me so interesting, Clownsworn?"
"The one who will destroy the old world. The one who will pave his way through chaos. The one with all the toys..." he laughs manaically. "You, tiny person-thing? AAAAHAHAHAHAH-"

And suddenly, green-scaled jaws snap down and I am looking at half a mongrel. The severed legs step forward into the pit and stumble out of sight, and I look up to see Ella and Jax riding on the back of...

?!?!

Jerasp?!

>>100264
Greet him with mild surprise.

Alright! I always thought Jerasp should have been developed begone just being "hey lol I have a sword that you want and- OHMYGODRUNSHITSHITSHIT *dies*"

>>100267
"J-j-jerasp? You're alive?!"

"HAHAHAHA!" he roars, spittiong out the dead Sworn into the pit with a chuckle. as he lands. Ella leaps over the pit and lands beside me, helping me up. "YOU THINK A TINY SPEAR COULD END JERASP, LORD OF THE MOUNTAINS?!"
"Are you alright, Hattori?" she asks.
"I'll be fine. It's Gerald I'm worried about..." I say quietly, looking up at the mighty warrior backing away from a blindingly fast onslaught of axes and fangs.

>>100272
Ask if Jerasp can carry/fling you, Arryn, and Ella over the chasm in order to help Gerald.

>>100272
Focus and carefully tip your hat to teleport to the other side of the chasm. Then lend your support to Gerald. Try using the flamecane to break through the fangsworn's parrying ability, if you can't just eliminate him with a sneak attack.

>>100442
>tip hat
...no. Just no.

>>100451
If Hattori is calm when he uses it, he has excellent control over the teleport. Using it only in emergencies is actually a BAD idea, since he'll be stressed and might fuck up.

>>100472
And it can still kill us at any time. Besides, I gave another viable solution.

Or we could have him, y'know, just fly us over there. Or have our bridge making friend make a bridge.

Moreover, why not just use the hat + cane to attack from here?

>>100476
((Remember: The Hat can only truly kill you if you enter a state of Panic, which I will notify you about. The hat-tip is core to several hat tricks, and I wouldn't nerf my first homemade unique character with something so silly! Furthermore, to those suggesting that Jerasp take him, have you ever seen a dragon take off? :3c I'll let you folks mull over this, but please, no arguing. I'll check in the morning, but for now Gooodnight))

>>100713
Can't use the hat to attack right now; Jax and Ella are around. We can still use instant abilities like the cufflinks shield, teleporting, expelling the contents of the hat, and Show Stopper.

>>100442
I tip my hat deeply, and suddenly I'm behind the reaving Fangsworn, pulling off my hat, and leaping into the air.

SHOW STOPPER!
Reaving Axes!

I place my hat on his head as he turns, the axe slicing open my belly as his head teleports above the chasm.

I pass out.

>>100963
Well, that actually turned out okay, aside from the passing out bit. Was that due to the special axe, or the special ability? I guess we'll know when we wake up.

Man, You guys really have to stop abusing the awesome stuff, like the clock and SHOW STOPPER. Use some cunning and let them kill themselves, or something like that.

For crying out loud, we have a cane that reduces beings to ash, how about implementing that in some awesome, grand master plan.

Being direct all the time makes you too predictable.

>>101062
But we like abusing awesome stuff.