A rocker, judging by that hair.

Yes. Your father is DEAD.

elf! come on, you can't be surprised. You have hair, and have you SEEN your ears?

Yes. Your father was champion of the Mosh Pits.

He defeated many foes single-handedly in his preferred arena of combat.

An Elf Honey...

In short, your father was Jack Black.

A complete pansy.
Try not to follow his example.

>>74363
Awww, you're so cute.

What's so bad about being half elf, anyway?

>>74365
MY PARENTS ARE DEAAAAAAD!!!

This is best gobbo evar.

>>74371
Look at that hair!
Those hideous pupils!
Those Linkish-sideburn-flap-things!

Aw, he didn't stay? I was hoping for some elf living with goblins awkwardness.

Your other father was a goblin, honey. I'm sorry.

>>74374
Screw you! She's adorable!

It's dangerous to go alone, here take this.

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)14:38 No. 74384 ID: b1e366
File 125771993655.png - (19.08KB , 1024x768 , You probably figured it out long ago.png )

"An Elf... Gods, you're really disappointing me if you didn't at least suspect something... It's kind of obvious."

>>74384

If she's a disappoint, what does that make YOU, then?

Still, the past is past.

>>74384
So where is that damned Elf now?

Hey Koz!

What happened to your armor? You look like you took a step down in the socioeconomic ladder.

>>74384
So what happened to him?

>>74384
where is he?
he was fun

>>74378
I was joking on goblin beauty norms.
My god, PUPILS. *Shudder*

>>74384
Look at it this way: You get better archery, woodscraft, or... that's all cultural, isn't it. Crap.

>>74363
What're you complaining about? You look adorable.

>>74391
Maybe you can use some animal speak like an elf?

>>74384
Int appears to be her dump stat.

Well, it's time to go out on the quest we give all elf girls. You're going to be a Magical Girl.

GO FIND YOUR FATHER, EH WAS A COOL GUY.

It is time to live up to your name and face FULL LIFE CONSEQUENCES

>>74396
this. a million times this.

Status report of the fortress? Can we afford to send a potentially good hand out into the world at this point?

>>74391
Better long range vision but worse in darkness? Better hearing, maybe agility, though her daddy didn't seem very good at that. She's bigger, so she might be stronger, though this being a dwarf/goblin sized fortress might give her some problems.

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)15:13 No. 74409 ID: b1e366
File 125772203094.png - (15.65KB , 1024x768 , HURK.png )

"ARE YOU TELLING MY GRANDDAUGHTER ABOUT YOUR SECRET SHAME?"

"It's not a secret, mother... Everyone knows."

"Well... It's still a shame."

"Then why didn't you honor kill me or something?"

"BECAUSE I WANTED TO SEE THE COOL FREAK BABY!"

"I'm a freak, grandma?"

"No, you're not a... Yes. Yes you are."

D:

Freaks are awesome. Now go become a magical girl.

>>74409
a HOT freak, but yeah. a freak

>>74409
Look in a mirror! You have pointy ears and pupils! Of course you're a freak! Now go out and become a munchkin'd out super adventurer. This is the destiny of all weird fucked up half breeds.

I think i need a family tree now. I'm lost.

>>74409
I'll bet you will make a superior beast tamer and bowmaster.

Work your way up to Giant Cave Spiders.

It looks like Ozund and whoever the crazy chick was begot Koz who fucked an elf and begot this new person who still doesn't have a name yet.

If you're a freak amungst goblins... maybe you can find peace amungst the elves. Go out and find your father. It is the only way.

>>74416
her name is tura. you can tell, as it's the name of the OP.

MY NAME'S TURA I'M AN ANIME

Dare I say.. a SUPER FREAK?

>>74423
You forgot the sunglasses.

>>74417
While i'd like to see his reaction i think getting close to elves might be a problem, and i wouldn't want such an adorable creature shot full of arrows.

Wait... does that make you a half-elf?

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)15:49 No. 74428 ID: b1e366
File 125772415541.png - (18.50KB , 1024x768 , Let me explain how this works.png )

Atu and Ozud, after a bout of bloody sex DIDN'T conceive a child, but Amxu and Stozu did after screwing in a box of swords, then later Atu and Ozud had Koz, who while clearing out a large pest infestation, ended up banging some elf dude who had come to kill them all, but didn't because it would be really awkward to do so after humping the evil he had originally intended to purge. Amxu and Stozu and Stusnu and Musor, who was originally called Sletnu, but that turned out to be a translation error and now his name is Musor. Nako is still a ronery cat lady.

THE END.

Yaaay! We need to get Nako a boyfriend.

Well thats one way to maintain genetic diversity.

Send Tura out in the world to forge an alliance with the elfs. After all, she's practically familly.

May I ask what happened to each goblin, especially the first five?

And I'm talking ALIVE/DEAD STATUS

>>74431
I don't think they'd like that... They tend to be more uptight about interracial situations.

However, it would be nice to meet your dad, perhaps we should be sneaky?

>>74433

Right here:
>>74428

So Zepave is a deadbeat dad? What a jerk.

>>74438
We must turn up and demand... how many years of allowance?

>>74436
Are you kidding? Elves and half-elves get along great. I'm sure Tura will be welcomed just as handilly as any other half-elf.

>>74423
SHE'S SUPER FREAK-AY

>>74441
How many half elves are half goblin too?

Zapave probably went to go drink his memories away in some tiny human town's bar anyway.

>>74417
>>74441
>>74431
Give it up, man.

>>74438
>>74440
Well being an elf it might be the equivalent to being gone for the weekend. He'd probably freak out at how big she is already.

>>74446

In Dorf Fortress both Goblins and Elves mature in 12 years.

Also, neither can die from old age.

Tura's job is probably to find her father.
If he didn't kill himself, that is.

Break out the feature and face-obscuring cloak!

>>74428
How does she look so perky when all her male parents were so ":|"?

I don't get it, how can fucking anything be a shame? That is unless it's not alive.

I'm pretty sure for male goblins it isn't a shame to fuck a hot elf chick. You know what's weird, all the shame and pathetic reputation that comes from elves is actually from the male side of the race. Females are just there to be hot and not hug trees at all.

>>74428
>The End.

Awsome quest bro

Tura, you should really get your grandaunt Nako hooked up with one of the Kobolds. ;)

>>74455
I think nose rubbing isn't quite the release she needs.

>>74428

So Koz, how did it feel to have your ass handed to you at strip poker by an elf?

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)16:45 No. 74473 ID: b1e366
File 125772751318.png - (183.31KB , 1024x768 , 5.png )

>Find dad.

"Do you know where he went, mom?"

"Meh... He just kind of wandered off. He seemed kind of shaken by something. Maybe the implications of the coupling of two mortal enemies who have been warring since the beginning of the world or because your grandmother bit him on the ankle... Who can say."

"EH TASH LIEK CHIKHEN"

There is an elf settlement to the southwest of here though. He may have come from there or at least stayed there a while. I hope you're no- Ow, mom... not thinking about going out there."

>>74473

"I can't help but be a little curious."

>>74473
You seem pretty dejected about it.

You miss him, don't you?

Actually yes, you are thinking about going out there.

>>74476
FYI that was directed at Koz.

>>74473
Don't you miss him, Koz?
And I'm sure that now that Tura knows the truth, she has to meet her dad to come to terms with it.

So wait, who did you think your father was prior to this?

Calm your grandmother with the fact that sex is hardly pathetic at all. It is a particularly awesome act take it is with a being.

Or rather "Why you dissing on sex grandma. You'd fuck or rape anything. That's a compliment by the way."

>>74484
For the love of god, definitely say this.

Ok you are going to need a cunning disguise to blend in with the elves. Some paint should do it.

Maybe she can say she's a swamp elf or something. There has to be a subrace with that coloration somewhere.

>>74484
>>74485
This makes no sense. You people have problems.

>>74476
Asking your mom if she misses him seems like a good idea.

>>74490
Yes. Claim we are a rare breed of swamp elf if asked.

Oh, and make sure we speak either common or elven around them. Don't want our speaking Goblin to give it away.

>>74502
Yeah there's totally all kinds of fuckin elfs all over the place. They'll probably buy it. Act all offended if they don't see beauty in your form, that's what elfs do too.

Make sure you go naked. Remember, elf women don't wear clothing. Thats what Atu says at least.

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)18:11 No. 74587 ID: b1e366
File 125773271368.png - (136.80KB , 1024x768 , 6.png )

>>74481
>>74476
"You miss him, don't you, mom?"

"I guess. So I won't put up too much of a fight if you want to go out there and find him. Just be careful. You're the only halfbreed aberration of a daughter I have."

>>74587
Tura hug Koz. Then get some mandatory supplies for traveling. Don't forget the towel.

Awww...

Give your mom a big hug then start making preperations, ASAP. We'll need lots of supplies and some weapons.

>>74587
"We'll try to be careful."

Initiate hugs and prepare for a coming of age journey/hero's quest.

How did a blond and a hairless woman make a redhead?

>>74600
Some genes from Koz were probably interpreted as red hair, even though she doesn't grow any. Genetics is pretty complicated stuff.

>>74600
She dies it.

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)18:51 No. 74633 ID: b1e366
File 125773511430.png - (131.61KB , 1024x768 , 7.png )

>Hug Mom, Read Hote

"Just remember to kick him right in the nuts for leaving me to raise his bastard child alone for almost twenty years!"

"Uh... Sure, mom... I promise."

"I can't understand how he could've left such a smoking hot package behind."

What are our weapon skills?

>>74633
Don't worry mom, we'll bring him back so you can do it yourself.

We need to find Nako one of those generic catpeople if she keeps on preferring the company of cats over respectable gobbo men.

>>74633
You know what you must do. It's Magical Girl time. You look perfect for it, if a little green. Otherwise, you're positively animu.

He probably didn't think elves and goblins were compatible. Finding out you're close enough to have children might make the elves go nuts.

Still, lets bring him back so you can have your awkward family reunion!

Man, you just wait. We're probably not even his only half breed children. We'll meet up with a half orc and a half dwarf and a half human and we'll form a band it'll be awesome. We'll call ourselves the half elven bastards and just roll in the dough.

>>74678
Zepave had a tough enough time actually doing the deed with a gobbo, and that was with our help. However awesome that would be, I doubt it.

>>74713
Whos to say he wasnt a very unfortunate elf? And after all, if its happened once it can happen again, right?

>>74716
I wouldn't call him unfortunate. Maybe clumsy, but getting saved by a goblin of all things takes some luck.

>>74779
He's the Rincewind of elves?

>>74816
And she's the Drizzt of the Goblins.

>>74818
Alright, that settles it. She's getting scimitars.

Tura 2009/11/08(Sun)20:42 No. 74824 ID: b1e366
File 125774174324.png - (157.66KB , 1024x768 , 8.png )

>>74635
Pointy end in the fleshy part. Easy.

"Here. Have my old armor and grab a weapon before you go."

>"This is armor? It's like a scrap of leather."

"I can't help that you're huge!"

>"You look like grandpa when you scowl like that..."

"OH, NOW YOU'RE PUSHING IT!"

I guess I could do something to make this bigger and I'll need to decide on what kind of weapon to take.

It... It's like a NAPKIN.

For armor, grab some of the old dwarven stuff thats probably still lying around.
Take a spear, it'll make you more elf like.
And grab a cat for companionship (you can wear it on your head, as elfs do)
oh, and don't forget to ask Amxu if she has a 'special surprise' for you before you go.

What do you have? It doesn't seem the fortress has advanced much in technology in those 20 years, or at least fashion remained the same, so i'd guess you might have a sword somewhere at best.

I guess bow and arrows and a sword could be decent enough. A knife never hurts either, though mostly for eating and such.

How strong are you?

>>74824

Try it on as is.

As for a weapon, take a flail or whip.

>>74824
That's like, what, armband-sized? Also, Dual Scimitars. You're the Drizzt of the Goblins.
Or, since that's stupid, I suggest sword'n'board. Go all shieldmaiden.

>>74832
Ooh, or a very large axe. Because it would be hilarious. How strong are you?

>>74824
Use it to keep your hair back.

On second though it might be better if you tell us how agile, strong and such you are.

>>74835
Requesting Standard Quest™-Brand Statcard

Also maybe you could get somebody with more combat experience to give you some training, just in case.

Rapier and a million knives.

>>74834
Also, strengthen your body through adversity and headbutt shit to death while punching.

>>74833

Yes, seconding very large axe.

>>75134
FOR THE METAL!

Come on Tura. I'm getting tons of reaction faces from this quest, keep going!

Tura 2009/11/10(Tue)14:15 No. 75497 ID: b1e366
File 12578913374.png - (247.28KB , 1024x768 , 9.png )

>AXE

"Pretend Stozu here is a log and get some practice swings in."

"Wait... what?"

>>75497
Go ahead. Give grand daddy some axe. You've seen him looking your axe over. You know he wants it.

>>75497

Well you don't wanna get yelled at by your mom. Hit him with the non-hurty side.

Hit him in the junk with the non-blade side.

>>75497
Your grandmother is still insane. Find something better and less living to practice on.

Get a whetstone and go practice outside.

Well you heard her. Don't worry. He's a champion wrestler and can propably dodge your sparring.

probably.

flip it around and play air guitara with the axe

>>75511
Yes. Mod the axe, string it up, become a bard.

What you need is to practice with mock weapons with somebody who defends him/herself. Hitting things that don't defend themselves is easy.

>>75497
Tap him on the head with it, then go find some wood.

>>75512
This. Is. Fucking. METAL.

Do it.

crack him in the head with the blunt side.

Show us your tits!

Instead of using the axe and having a sparring accident, practice your unarmed combat and dodging skills.

I just realized that if we want to sneak into elven lands carrying an axe is not going to help with the elf disguise. Unless perhaps we transfigure this mere 'axe' into a MIGHTY MUSICAL AXE! as some of you are suggesting.

If such is beyond our power it may be more expedient to chose a more 'elven' weapon, so as we can pass ourselves off as some kind of exotic elven sub-race from a far off land.

Bow, arrows, sword, knife/dagger.

Gather thousands of pebbles and start trowing them!

I still say find a luthier and have him string up the axe.

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)12:53 No. 76471 ID: b1e366
File 125823200914.png - (400.62KB , 1024x768 , Bath.png )

Later... or something.

(Gnoll canceled task: Update Quest. Interrupted by lack of plot. Again.)

>>76471
So, wait... what happened? This isn't adventuring! This isn't adventuring at all!

>>76471
What are you talking about? She was on her way to GREAT ADVENTURE!

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)13:24 No. 76477 ID: b1e366
File 125823386379.png - (405.76KB , 1024x768 , 10.png )

Fine! I'm going...

>>76477
Wear the face-obscuring hood when you get close to the elven towns, you don't want to get shot by a bunch of arrows because you look like a goblin.

>>76477
You did throw on some clothes before heading out, right? You're looking rather barefoot there.

>>76482
lol she's an exhibitionist

>>76479
I'm sure she'll be fine. We all know how much elves love half-elves, especially those crossed with non-human races. If only she were some sort of dorf-elf...

Find something to have sex with.

>>76487
Ok quit it with the bizarro breeding program. We need to locate Daddy boy. He owes us a helluva pile of birthday presents.

>>76477
Let's see if we can't find some civilization. Once there we can barter/steal some proper maps, then we can plan this trip better.

>>76503
That reminds me, does Tura have any material possessions with her, and/or money?

>>76477
Have a wacky random encounter with something, befriend it, and have it join your party.

>>76544
Excellent! Let us proceed with caution. Those elves are tricksy ponces and we shall have to be on our toes.

I wonder if we should pass ourselves off as an adventurer or bard of some kind... have any useful or unique talents dear?

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)15:36 No. 76551 ID: b1e366
File 125824180049.png - (292.76KB , 1024x768 , 11.png )

>>76482
>>76515
I have Goblin Dagger, Dorf Waraxe, Cat Leather Shirt, Cat Leather Loincloth, Cat Leather Belt and Food Rations.

I also have this Feature Obscuring Cloak

>>76487
Not right now.

>>76551
Lose all the clothes except for the belt. Carry the knife and the ax on your belt.

>>76551
You know what you need to get (in addition to a map or any information for this very vague adventure of yours)?

A hat. You lack a bitchin' hat.

>>76551
Obscure features and let us be off... don't forget that our dramatic identity reveal to our father must be as dramatic and cloak twirling as possible... elves love drama.

>>76551
How did you manage to get that tiny loincloth around your massive half-elven hips?

>>76595
cat leather is stretchy.

>>76595
Many cats died for those hips.

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)17:12 No. 76622 ID: b1e366
File 125824756653.png - (369.55KB , 1024x768 , 12.png )

>>76503
The elves to the south east are the best bet, so I'll just sneak in and look aro-

>"HALT!"

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

>>76622
"'Sup, fellow elf? Sure is a great day to be an elf, amirite? I sure could go for some Keebler cookies right about now!"

>>76622
Ask if he knows someone by the name of Zepave.

>>76622
Oh hello there! beautiful day in the forest isn't it?... So far from my native swamp.

I don't believe we've met before have we? My name is Pavaze... and you are?

No, this is good. Don't do anything menacing, say hello, he'll probably ask what you're doing here, so say you're searching for Zepave Cilithiliri.

>>76622
GREETINGS FELLOW NATURE LOVER! SURE IS A LOVELY DAY! MY WHAT A LOVELY SWAMP YOU LIVE IN. NOT AT ALL LIKE THE SWAMPS AT HOME, ME BEINGG A SWAMP ELF AND ALL HAHAHAHA

>>76622
Don't act like an idiot and get all defensive. He has yet to attack, ask him why he's stopping you.

>>76622

Actually you could probably pass as a dryad or some other nature-y spirit if someone pressed for information.

Or an elf with a strange skin disease.

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)17:58 No. 76671 ID: b1e366
File 125825031288.png - (297.50KB , 1024x768 , 13.png )

"Oh hello there! beautiful day in the forest isn't it? I'm looking for Zepave Cilithiliri. Do you know him?"

>"Not offhand. Who are you? Why are you looking for this Zepave and why are you hiding your face?"

"I'm pretty ugly."

>>76671
Tell him he was a very good friend of your mother, then say that she has passed away and that her last wish was for you to send the message to him in person.

>>76671
"When I was little, Daddy would get to drinking his special apple juice and then I'd get to back-sassin' over things like needin' food and clothes and he'd have to hit me for my own good..."

>>76671
Tell him it is a custom among your people to keep their faces hidden in public.

>>76677
This, only say its women only.
Hurka burka durka.

I have crippling self image issues.

>>76671
I'm a Sludge Elf... whats wrong.. never seen one before?

Anyhow... Zapave is a a friend of the family, its been quite some time since we last met.

>>76671
Momma always said I was beautiful, but I knew I didn't look like everyone else in my village. It didn't help that they looked at me like I was some kind of freak.

So when I decided I needed to go out into the world, I realized I should hide my face so I don't bother people. Please don't make me expose myself, I just need to find Zepave.

>>76684
lets not tell the elf our lifestory please... We are a lone woman on the trail... telling him of our hidden beauty can not help us here.

>>76671
Say nothing, turn your head, pull down the hood, shed a few silent tears. That'll get him to stop asking questions.

We are a swamp elf. Your forest, while beautifull, smells odd to our swamp-accustomed nose.

Make up a terrible skin condition.
Offer to sleep with him to forget this whole meeting.
Claim you have no face.

>>76677
Additionally, I'm gonna go along with the sludge elf story.

"Because... of the shame of being a bastard child, the world shall not see my face. I want to find my 'dad'"

>>76700
Elves don't take kindly to halfbreeds. Go with some form of other pure elf.

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)19:07 No. 76706 ID: b1e366
File 125825447083.png - (250.36KB , 1024x768 , 14.png )

"I'm a Sludge Elf... What's wrong? Never seen one before?"

>"Oh, yes... Of course. That's fine. I was worried you might be one of those damn, filthy goblins."

>>76706
Ignore the comment about goblins and request to ask around town about Zepave.

>>76706
Look vaguely sad and lonely, so that we may all d'aww at your adorable vulnerability.

>>76706
Everyone here is gonna be racist, just ignore the bigots. Ask if you may continue on.

Yes. well um. Goblins is why we're here. we are here to save our people from the horrible goblin invasion.. Zepave Cilithiliri has some information which may save my people. Its urgent I see him at once.

"I've been mistaken for a goblin a lot recently, would you mind escorting me around. I'm afraid i'm allergic to being poked with the pointy end of weapons."

>>76713
We don't want to raise alarm bells against goblins... not at all.

Just ignore the goblin comment and ask about the way to the nearest town, perhaps he would be so kind as to show us the way?

Use "female persuasion" to make him escort you around the elfish village place

>>76721
But not too persuasive... we know what these elf men are like with our kind. That's why we are here after all!

I think we should just thank him and walk by.
Act suspiciously near someone who can't call for backup.

Tura 2009/11/14(Sat)20:36 No. 76725 ID: b1e366
File 125825976022.png - (184.87KB , 1024x768 , 15.png )

>>76709
>>76724
"Thank you. Will that be all?"

>"Yes. I have to continue my patrol. We can't have the undesirables just wandering in, now can we?"

I'll show him... Slit him like a trout... Bastard... Son of a... Rip his liver out...

What was I doing again?

>>76725
Find dad and ruin his life.

>>76725
You must locate Zepave.

>>76725
Locate ZEPAVE
Collect CHILD SUPPORT

Not right now, you can fix everything later, for now just find your dad.

>>76725
Elves are like that... very elitist you'll find.

It helps them feel better about their lack of significant technological and cultural advancement since the before the first Age despite their extreme longevity.

>>76725
Remember your tribe or whatever you want to call it is rather odd. It seems the rest can't be arsed farming or herding cats so they raid stuff, hence people disliking them.

Now try to find that village and maybe ask in the tavern.

>>76725
An remember, he's probably much better trained than you are. You may want to find yourself someone knowledgeable in the fightan arts to learn from as well. That and get the axe strung up by a luthier to become an awesome bard.

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)06:55 No. 76808 ID: b1e366
File 125829692064.png - (100.93KB , 1024x768 , 16.png )

Oh... I hate this place already.

Could be worse. Time to start looking, go up to a house and knock.

>>76808
The grey house in the back looks like a tavern. Check it out.

>>76811
Yeah, go check out the tavern or whatever that is. Mind you, if it really is a bar, make sure to be wary of seedy characters.

Go to tavern.
ask about dad.
???
PROFIT

Something tells me searching for a thin blue eyed blond man isn't going to help much. So find the tavern or equivalent and ask.

no, we have a name, and a discription.

I think we need to be circumspect about our motives... its will be pretty hard to pass off our true motives (or identity of we are forced to kidnap him) if we go door to door asking about Zepave Cilithiliri, second son of Imere Cilithiliri.

However, it could be possible to go to the local tavern equivalent and make a gather information check. Don't forget that these people are also your kin... as unusual as they may be.

Pretend to be a Sidequest-Giving NPC. Act like there's an important mission for Zepave and he has to follow you. He'll recognize you, but will be too embarrassed to act like it.

No kidnapping. If he's even here we can probably get him to come back home just by threatening to reveal the truth to the other elves.

I also see no reason to not ask about him directly.

>>76832
because he will probably scream like a little girl and run away.
I vote for straight up asking about him

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)10:39 No. 76844 ID: b1e366
File 125831035029.png - (169.97KB , 1024x768 , 17.png )

>Ask at the tavern

It's like a flower garden barfed in here and the bartender looks too snooty for his own good.

>"I'm sorry, if you are looking for handouts, then I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"I'm looking for Zepave Cilithiliri. I have... uh... message about some family business for him."

>"I may have heard it in passing, but I'm quite sure he's not a permanent resident here. Now if that is all..."

>>76844
Doesn't your barbaric goblin blood boil at this snooty fellow?

Don't you want to kill him and run away before you are discovered?

>>76844
Just thank him and move along.

How about you get out of there before you kill someone, cuz if that happens things are gonna get really bad really fast.

>>76844
Ask him if he happens to have a general idea of where Zepave might live. Even a direction would help.
Regardless, be polite and thank him for the help. You can wash off the disgusting feeling you'll get from being nice to elves after you leave this place.

"one more question then i'll go. Do you know of anywhere where i might be able to find someone who knows more about him?" Refrain from punching spock in his elf mouth.

pickpocket someone, use money to strengthen tavern keepers memory

>>76844
Ask if there are any jobs that need doing... you are a stranger in a strange land and you're going to need to work up some capital for eating and sleeping at least.

Who knows how much further you may need to travel.

Also... try to keep your wits about you, they expect elves to act snooty 'so while in Rome...'

>>76844
Well, he's a prick. Looks like Daddy ain't here. You may have to ask around and find where he would be right now. Maybe find someone who's less of a pompous ass to accompany you on this journey, but I doubt you'd find anyone like that in an elf town.

Dad is an exterminator.
Ask about known elf extermination companies.

Also ask for a temporary job.

If this is the elf town closest to the fortress maybe he stopped here for supplies. You could try asking at some shop, one with magic potions would be best.

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)13:12 No. 76901 ID: b1e366
File 125831956728.png - (178.08KB , 1024x768 , 18.png )

Meanwhile, somewhere similar, yet distinctly different...

>"You expect me to remember if an adventurer named Zepave Cilithiliri came in here and bought potions sometime about twenty years ago?"

Of course! Everyone knows elves have a photographic memory, and are meticulous record keepers.

>>76901
Yes. You're an elf.

"You don't keep records!? What kind of establishment are you?"
Followed by asking about elf extermination companies

>>76903
and either insult his intelligence, manhood, or race. Generally as an elf he will force himself to remember just to prove you wrong.

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)13:27 No. 76907 ID: b1e366
File 125832044830.png - (184.00KB , 1024x768 , 19.png )

"Yes. You're an elf."

>"Fine. Yes, he bought some healing potions and headed north. I don't think he ever came back here."

>>76907
I DONT KNOW WHO YOU ARE WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT SORT OF GENETICS DO YOU HAVE

Ask for the extermination company dad worked for.

Ask for the extermination company dad worked for.

Ask if he has any idea where he came from. Oh and thank him for the help.

>>76907
Ask him what other elf villages are nearby.

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)14:36 No. 76945 ID: b1e366
File 125832457227.png - (174.71KB , 1024x768 , 20.png )

>"Are you even going to buy anything? If you don't have any money, you can go get me some Starshimmer Moss. It grows in caves, so by the time you get back with some, I might have remembered where he said he was from."

ARGH!

>>76945
OR

You could just tackle him and torture him until he reveals the information.

Or torture him with your vagina <3

>>76945
Well, this is your only lead. Agree to it. Is there some at home?

>>76945
Solution: threat of violence.

>>76945

Say: "Whatever.", take the healing potion and be on your way to those caves.

Do we have any of that from our time living in a goblin cave?

>>76945
"How 'bout I show you my tits instead?"

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)14:53 No. 76959 ID: b1e366
File 125832560118.png - (181.25KB , 1024x768 , 21.png )

>>76946
>>76948
>Subtle Approach.

"WHERE THE FUCK IS HE, YOU SCRAWNY ASSHOLE!?"

>"OH GODS!"

God I love the subtle approach.

>>76959
Rape him. Rape him until he reveals his secrets.

>>76959
Okay calm down, you don't wanna get thrown out of town.

Don't actually threaten him, just look threatening.

Come on, the first elf to actually be somewhat helpful and you flip out at him. I guess it's probably too late to persuade him with your feminine charms.

Well, if we're going to attack we might as well go all the way. Loot everything!

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)15:14 No. 76987 ID: b1e366
File 125832688262.png - (179.15KB , 1024x768 , 22.png )

>>76964
"So where did you say he was from?"

>"KAFFIDOTHA IFLAND! THU VAH SOOF!"

>>76987
Hug him and thank him for the information.

>>76987
Some Island, to the south.

Okay then, we got our info. Smother him unconscious with delicious Half-Elf boobs, then head on out.

Also loot and pillage the store.

explain predicament... except replace certain species with goblins.
Also let him know that you'll repay him as needed... if there's anything he sees that he likes.

>>76987
"Good boy! You were smart to give me the information I wanted. Other Sludge Elves aren't as forgiving as me. Keep that in mind next time you try to con someone into doing your errands."

Get off him, re-obscure features, and PROCEED WITH GUSTO.

>>76987


Eh. You went so far. Now finish it. Kill him and raid the store.

>>76996
...do this.

>>77001
Don't do that. He's given you the information after all.

Do convince him to not make a fuss though.

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)15:44 No. 77033 ID: b1e366
File 125832864442.png - (158.43KB , 1024x768 , 23.png )

>PROCEED WITH GUSTO.

"Ha... Ha... YOU'LLNEVERCATCHMEYOUGOATRAPINGTREEFUCKERS! AIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!"

>>77001
Don't do that. He's given you the information after all.

Do convince him to not make a fuss though.

Bind hair with cloak, take off clothes
use skin color to blend in and hide in an open field full of tall grass

>>77035
I guess i was late. Oh well.

>>77033
Flip them off.

>>77033
Head south!

Atu: Using your maternal instincts, sense that your freak granddaughter is doing something, somewhere in the world, to make you proud!
Stand up and cheer, then rush to tell everyone the good news!

>>77033
I'm really starting to like you.

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)16:57 No. 77125 ID: b1e366
File 125833303651.png - (151.13KB , 1024x768 , 24.png )

Ha... Haa... Haa... Lost th-them... I think. Almost died... That was awesome.

whats a goa and why do they trap them?

wow, you're just like your grandmother.

>>77125
Keep your hood up! That red hair is extremely visible against the forest greenery.

>>77125

You got a good set of legs on you, being able to outrun all those elves.

>>77127
She said "goat raping"

Right, onwards to kathadoa island. We'll need a boat. any port towns that you can think of? Do you have a map?

>>77125
Girl.. I tunr my eyes away for a few hours and you doing all kinds o crazy shit!

What if you got killed? Who would have told your mother?

Anyhow... check the loot! What did you manage to get?

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)17:15 No. 77144 ID: b1e366
File 125833413341.png - (89.11KB , 1024x768 , 25.png )

>>77132
I got... ah... two potions... and a finger.

Mmmm. Cheesy elf fingers.

Where did that finger come from?

>>77144
Ouch! you bite the poor bastard?

Anyhow... let's be off, and try not to piss off the natives next time! We don't want to have to swim off that Island!

Don't forget that if you start pointing too many fingers at your father (eheheh) he may be forced to point out just where your family and friends live.

I don't doubt he's been silent about that 'incident' so far... but we don't want to force his hand.

>>77159
He probably doesn't want people knowing he got it on with a goblin though. Just keep the whole sludge elf thing going.

Proceed to port town

Tura 2009/11/15(Sun)19:10 No. 77252 ID: b1e366
File 125834105132.png - (153.63KB , 1024x768 , 26.png )

>>77215
Oh gods, humans are huge. Why are they so huge?
This is crazy, this is crazy, this is crazy.

>>77252
Don't worry they arn't as snooty as Elves... but be careful... they don't particularly like elves or goblins either.

Just try to avoid too much attention.

подметно 2009/11/15(Sun)19:16 No. 77260 ID: f78140
File 125834140139.jpg - (35.42KB , 256x223 , huge-guts.jpg )

>>77252
THEY ARE HUGE BECAUSE THEY HAVE HUGE GUTS
also, they have an unusually wide variety of tastes, so while >>77256 is partially right, if you're (un)lucky you'll find one that will want to stick it's dick in you rather than fight or run from you.

>>77260
That was why I told her to avoid any attention. Some have odd ways of enforcing 'dominance' over strange females.

Find a ship to "KAFFIDOTHA IFLAND!", see if you can convince the captain to let you work in exchange for the trip.

Or stow away..though that'll probably get you jettisoned into the ocean.

>>77252
Find some sort of map so you can figure out exactly what the elf was trying to say while muffled. Going around saying the name of some island incorrectly would be a bad idea.

>>77305
Well i guess it's Kassidotha Island, but wouldn't hurt to check.

>>77305
I would second this... and try and see if you can work up some cash (legally this time) before attempting to book passage across the sea.

Try selling your potions.

Try to find a map of the region as a whole.

Tura 2009/11/16(Mon)02:43 No. 77457 ID: b1e366
File 125836820314.png - (119.07KB , 1024x768 , 27.png )

>>77310
"I have potions."

>"I'm thrilled for you. What do they do? It's store policy not to buy unlabeled fluids from little green people."

>>77457
"Health potions, from my native tribe."

Lay off the potions for a second, don't wanna get him riled up unless needed, but you should ask about Zepave first anyway.

>>77457
Admit that you don't know. You... um. Found them. On some guy.
Ask if there's any way to find out that doesn't involve ingesting them.

>>77457
Point out that you also have breasts, and if he buys the potions, he might get to see them.

>>77472
How about not...
Lets just hold off on the potions. Perhaps you should try them out on a small dog, rat or something?

Its red. What do you think they do. They restore health.

Or... you know... fruit juice.

>>77457
See if he'll TRADE them for some clothes then, this looks like a clothes store.

>>77457
You looted them from a corpse of a boar you killed in the wild. Why the boar was carrying potions you haven't the slightest idea, but it explains the lack of labels.

>>77457
Question his worth as a shopkeeper. Everyone knows shopkeepers will buy everything.

Alternatively rape rape rape

Whatever happened to red is healing, purple rejuvenation and blue mana?

ask where you can get those things identified

Tura 2009/11/16(Mon)16:53 No. 77740 ID: b1e366
File 12584192275.png - (112.74KB , 1024x768 , 28.png )

>>77575
>"Excellent point, not interested. Buy something or get out."

>>77740
"I'd like to buy information about an elf named Zepave."

>>77740
Ask if there have been any elves passing through recently.

>>77740
Why is everyone such a douche? You should've brought money with you.

You need to find work... Be it selling your body, hard labor, or theivery. Better yet, go mug some people in the outskirts of town.

>>77751
Thief sounds good. If I'd predicted this outcome, I wouldn't have suggested a large axe...

>>77755
Honest work is probably better in the long run though, the less people trying to kill you the better.

Chopping wood was a viable and much need task for city furnaces and forges... it would be hard work, but we have our own tools, and it would get our stats up (always a plus as an adventurer!)

Besides that it would familiarize you with metalworking, glassworking or cooking (some valuable skills that could prove very useful back at home when we return.) It will take a few weeks but, we 'are' theoretically immortal.. as is our dad...

Also make a note that it isn't unusual for humans to not live beyond 40 or 50! they just die like that! Most of these guys will not remember your father passing through two decades ago because they were playing with marbles and jacks back then.