[Burichan] [Futaba] [Nice] [Pony]  -  [WT]  [Home] [Manage]
[Catalog View] :: [Graveyard] :: [Rules] :: [Quests] :: [Discussions] :: [Wiki]

[Return] [Entire Thread] [Last 50 posts] [Last 100 posts]
Posting mode: Reply
Name (optional)
Email (optional, will be displayed)
Subject    (optional, usually best left blank)
File []
Password  (for deleting posts, automatically generated)
  • How to format text
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG, SWF
  • Maximum file size allowed is 10000 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.

File 141852880064.png - (138.18KB , 600x600 , RotC1.png )
611369 No. 611369 ID: 53f127

"Curses! Foiled again!"
Expand all images
No. 611370 ID: 53f127
File 141852882119.png - (82.42KB , 600x600 , RotC2.png )

"To think that I..."
No. 611371 ID: 53f127
File 141852888303.png - (115.94KB , 600x600 , RotC3.png )

"...Cyclops Supreme, should be humiliated thus by those meddlesome do-gooders, the Ace Defenders!"
No. 611374 ID: c9f2af

Have you read the evil overlord list? From the sound of things, you're almost certainly doing something you shouldn't be.
No. 611375 ID: 53f127
File 141852902591.png - (108.16KB , 600x600 , RotC4.png )

"Of course this is just a temporary setback. The Ace Defenders may have foiled my plan to use giant robot mosquitoes to seize control of the world's oil supply, but soon they and the rest of the world will tremble at the very mention of CYCLOPS!"
No. 611378 ID: a19cd5

I already have our next plan: We create Bio-engineered mole-people who will burrow into the residences of all the world leaders and kidnap them for exhorbitant ransoms!
No. 611379 ID: 53f127
File 141852917605.png - (119.64KB , 600x600 , RotC5.png )

All CYCLOPS, retreat! CYCLOPS air control, route a cyclopter to my position for retrieval immediately! All forces will rendezvous at ultra top secret base Charlie Bravo."
No. 611380 ID: 53f127
File 141852927095.png - (100.65KB , 600x600 , RotC6.png )

No. 611382 ID: defceb

Whoa slow down Cyclopes Supreme. Do you have an evil staff? I think you need an evil staff for your next plan.
No. 611383 ID: 53f127
File 141852933179.png - (75.06KB , 600x600 , RotC7.png )

"CYCLOPS, roll call!"
No. 611384 ID: 53f127
File 141852946867.png - (84.55KB , 465x600 , RotC8.png )

Mistress Von Strife. My personal bodyguard and lead torture technician. Master of nine forms of martial arts and an expert with weapons of all sizes.
No. 611385 ID: 53f127
File 141852955418.png - (70.17KB , 488x600 , RotC9.png )

Otto Maticfyre:
A man so obsessed with weapons that he had his own head surgically replaced with a functioning gun. He has personally designed all of CYCLOPS's armaments.
No. 611387 ID: 53f127
File 141852968119.png - (78.04KB , 512x600 , RotC10.png )

Doctor Madman. With a mind as brilliant as it is twisted, his diabolical inventions strike terror into the hearts of the innocent.
No. 611388 ID: 53f127
File 141852975222.png - (47.75KB , 600x600 , RotC13.png )

And most importantly...


My shadowy board of advisers with whom I am in constant contact through a radio in my helmet.
No. 611389 ID: 687279

I've always wondered where he put his brain.
No. 611390 ID: a19cd5

"Sup brah. Now, about those mole-people kidnapping the world leaders..."
No. 611391 ID: 53f127
File 141852987301.png - (122.24KB , 600x600 , RotC14.png )

"Now, you may have heard I had my last board of shadowy advisors liquidated following our most recent setback, but I don't want you to let that stop you from speaking up.
We need to brainstorm a new scheme to conquer the world and I'm not afraid to get crazy. There is no scheme too grand or farfetched for this table. Go!"
No. 611395 ID: defceb

1. Molepeople.
2. Get an evil staff.
3. Maybe a little crown too.
No. 611397 ID: 2ec61a

probably should have made a note that this intro would take a bit

an anti gravity field generator with which we negate the weight of the white house and the area around it. letting us lift the whole thing up with a helicopter and steal it! and attach a small self destruct to the device so that if they stop us somehow then the whitehouse will be stuck wherever they foiled us!
No. 611399 ID: c9f2af

Give the world's most hated and despised subgroups massively powerful weapons the likes of which they've never had access to before.

Let them damage things, outrage everyone, soak the damage from the heros. Then sweep in and save the day, triggering the kill switches on their equipment.

Mount massive PR campaign, ride public adulation to power, do everything possible to discredit and embarrass the heros for failing to fix the problem and allowing things to get as bad as they did before you stepped in.

>roll call
What happened to Fifi, your adorable pet? Doesn't she always have a spot at these things?
No. 611400 ID: db83ac

Okay, but this is going to get weird:

1. Conquer Brazil or Argentina.
2. Build layered network of wired tunnels across the continent, starting at a Mayan temple. WARNING: DO NOT BUILD AND/OR STORE A CORE SUPERWEAPON / DOOMSDAY DEVICE OF ANY KIND... in South America. Anywhere else is fine.
3. Network in place, begin a series of guerrilla attacks / hostile takeovers of South American assets - cartels, organ-harvesting businesses, entire high-class cities where all the rich CEOs go for vacation. Link them up to your tunnels.
4. BUILD THE WORLD'S GREATEST ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE. Hire some scientists in North America if you're having trouble - they likely won't do much to stop your evil plan if you do good and evil at the same time (by supporting human progress with your world-conquering) and threaten their reputations and not their lives. WARNING: DO NOT INTIMIDATE NERDS WITH VIOLENCE. They can turn your network against you.
5. Make sure the intelligence is treated like a real person. From here, the AI will surpass us and formulate an even better plan that is almost guaranteed to take over the world, and we get paid. But do NOT double-cross us. We have secrets that you wouldn't believe if we said them to your face and gave you concrete evidence of. Secrets that can END you, no matter how powerful you become.
No. 611402 ID: defceb

Wait what do you mean by 'liquidated'?
No. 611404 ID: 687279

Make a bomb that drills to the center of the earth. Threaten to explode the planet's core!
No. 611405 ID: db83ac


Actually, now that I think about it, why not multitask? Build an army of molepeople, have them build tunnels with internet wires in some second-or-third-world country, and then build an uber-AI with the molepeople scientists? And to build good PR, create a new line of high-tech military equipment, only to put killswitches in every piece, which are easily accessible with the mole network's router system?

Call it "Project: GroundDigging"
No. 611406 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "So that's two votes for mole people. I like it, but it needs something more."

>Get an evil staff and crown.

:cysu: "...I'll take your critique of my current wardrobe under advisement, counselor Apollo..."

>an anti gravity field generator with which we negate the weight of the white house and the area around it. letting us lift the whole thing up with a helicopter and steal it! and attach a small self destruct to the device so that if they stop us somehow then the whitehouse will be stuck wherever they foiled us!

:cysu: "Excellent! We need more ideas like this one. I don't care much for your defeatist attitude though. If you're going to start off by assuming the plan is going to fail then why the hell execute it in the first place?"

>Give the world's most hated and despised subgroups massively powerful weapons the likes of which they've never had access to before.

:cysu: "Hmm... Time for the dregs to rise up, eh? Deliciously deviant."


:cysu: "Of course! My beloved pet that I call an iguana even though she looks nothing like an iguana! She's being groomed at the moment but shall join us shortly..."
No. 611408 ID: 53f127

> Wait what do you mean by 'liquidated'?

:cysu: "I had them submerged in acid until their flesh liquified."
No. 611409 ID: defceb

uhhhhhhh can I un-volunteer from the shadow council? Being liquidated sounds uncomfortable.
No. 611410 ID: db83ac

Am I chopped liver or-


I REMEMBER! There was some kind of project back in the... whatever! Basically, you can create a giant robot that gives the finger to the square-cube law by tunneling underground and connecting the robot to various tectonic plates! We use a form of nature older than life itself as a framework for a machine that is sturdier than anything humanity has ever created on their own! The robot becomes part metal and part Earth Crust! By doing this, we can create a giant robot so large that it can hug nuclear bombs, AND cause earthquakes the moment it is activated!!!

No. 611412 ID: 6e79d4

Blackmail on a monolithic scale. Intercept all communications of anyone of any importance, make them either pay up or become complacent in your plans.

Earthquake bombs. HUNDREDS OF THEM. Ace defenders can't defend everything at once.

Fund pirates and guerrillas loyal to our cause to keep do-gooders busy.

Find a shady corporation with secret ties to the military and steal all their shit.
No. 611413 ID: 53f127

:drmad: "it was the bright green kind of acid. Ahha hahaha HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

:cysu: "Settle down, Doctor Madman."

:cysu: "They were responsible for a laundry list of bad ideas prior to their... retirement. I'm prepared to give this board some time to find its feet."
No. 611414 ID: 687279

Mind control chocolate.
No. 611415 ID: 2ec61a

it is not defeatist i am thinking like. it is victory no matter what, if we win we win. but if we lose, we still win!
No. 611419 ID: db83ac

This might be derogatory - NO NOT THE FACE I'LL TALK I'LL TALK!!!

Create a new species of centaur-minotaur-moletaur people? SORRY OKAY GETTING SERIOUS SORRY!!!

Just create some mythical-creature designer babies to be adopted by hipsters - they'll accept the children as their own and pay you billions. Win-win.

Except you affect their brain chemistry so that the first generation is made of tykebombs ready to cause havoc to the upper class bourgeoisie. Bonus points if you can brainwash the babies to be excessively cruel and loyal to you.

Please make sure that you use DNA stolen from random sperm banks across the globe, we don't want anyone getting any ideas here - okay, fuck you, even we have standards. S-sorry.
No. 611421 ID: 53f127

>Am I chopped liver or?

:cysu: "You will be if you presume to threaten me again! I like your ideas, though. Any thoughts on how we conquer Argentina?"
No. 611422 ID: ea0ad9

You know what we need? Electromagnetic generators. I mean, we'd have to "enlist" some people to move the pedal-powered vehicles, but our enemies would suddenly be unable to use electronics on us!

Also, if Doctor Madman isn't already working on (or has already finished) a Galleon that can FLY, I'm going to be sorely disappointed.
No. 611423 ID: 53f127


No. 611427 ID: db83ac

Okay, I think I have a plan to conquer Argentina: Salami Slices Plus 3-D Environmentalism.

Salami Slicing: Make reasonable excuses to add more and more of your troops and assets into Argentina. Plan each action so that they look totally reasonable if each action was performed by a different organization. Never state your direct intentions to conquer the country; that will cause all of that country's allies / enemies / true owners to suddenly whiplash their heads at you and point excessively unnecessary firepower at your head. Because of the sorry state of international affairs, you can effectively conquer a country if you have enough firepower and patience, and the other nations probably won't lift a finger to stop you!

Environmentalism: Argentina is subject to a LOT of environmental abuse. Rainforests cut down in acres to be replaced by cow farms which devour the grasslands and produce as much methane as a city of rich spoiled kids constantly street-racing. Propose to the country a reform with your new construction crew of mole-people. Build a system of mirrors and tunnels that distributes sunlight and rain evenly to underground rainforests. You get one hell of a new super-base and look good doing it!
No. 611432 ID: 53f127


:cysu: Excellent, now you're sounding more like the Kome I thought I'd recruited.
This is a brainstorming session so I'm not going to say 'no' to any ideas, but I am going to say I'm not sure how I feel about this 'environmentalism' angle. We're not here to make the world a better place, we're here to conquer it and install me as its unquestioned dictator.
Don't forget, CYCLOPS stands for:
'Lesser order people' means all those worthless unwashed masses who have no value except as means to my ends.
No. 611435 ID: 256d52

Sir, I think you need to go larger. Conquering a country or stealing the White House is an evil deed of repute, but is it one worthy of CYCLOPS SUPREME?

Phase one requires something truly monumental!

If those accursed Ace Defenders become aware of the anti gravity device, they will be expecting an air attack.

So why not undermine their defences? Use an army of subterranean molemen to tunnel under the world's most valuable monuments, attach the anti gravity devices for easy transportation, and then whisk them away through the heavily defended underground tunnels you've prepared in advance in a single coordinated worldwide attack!
No. 611438 ID: db83ac

People have been trying to make the world a better place for millennia, only to end up adding to the mess and installing greater and crueler dictators in higher places and stronger countries. Ignorance and bickering go a LONG way, even without all the selfish people.

Methinks we need to take that into consideration. Extensively.

But as for crushing yokes? Why not hijack NASA and take control of the moon? And then get the mole people to dig in specific places and build a machine that can control the gravitational pull of ocean waves on earth?

Eh, not one of my better ideas. Just blow up NASA and steal all their assets - like they're ever going to use them correctly, anyway.
No. 611439 ID: defceb

Okay, okay, how about this. We frame the Ace Defenders for stealing nuclear warheads in Pakistan, then have them declared traitors while Mistress Von Strife becomes disguises herself as the President to give us a leg up into politics.

Then, we invite all the world leaders into a summit where we trick them into launching ALL their nuclear weapons and then disable our OWN nuclear weapons so they all have to disarm their own or be responsible for big kabooms all around. THEN we reveal that we own a huge kinetic bombardment satellite and threaten the world to make CYCLOPS SUPREME the leader of the world or face it's wrath.

Do we have a ninja on our team? I think this plan will need a ninja.
No. 611443 ID: 0f3813

>Any thoughts on how we conquer Argentina?
Kidnap Maradona.
That's about it.
No. 611444 ID: 53f127


:cysu: "I like your attitude... 256D52! Keep pitching ideas like that and you will get first pick of territories to govern once we redraw all the maps.
Don't forget, when we pull this off, each of you will become a baron of your own kingdom, answerable to no authority but mine!"

:cysu: "I'm starting to get the feeling that the consensus here is mole people."
No. 611446 ID: 687279

...what about... robotic mole people?
No. 611447 ID: 0f3813

No. 611449 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "We have a ninja. I didn't introduce him because he's hidden among you. Gauging your loyalty..."
No. 611450 ID: db83ac

Hm... this might not be possible but

Find DNA samples of the muse who Leonardo da Vinci painted, and then have her clone go on a murderous rampage in the Louvre? For bonus points, have her desecrate the Mona Lisa.

Oh, and to keep your minions in line, find a crate of baby chicks, beat them to death in front of your minions, and then cook and serve their fried and/or marinated-spice remains to everyone. Eating is mandatory.

Too cruel? THEY DO THAT TO GEESE IN CANADA. You may want to do something about that. Taking down an animal factory might increase your PR while allowing you to perform mayhem and destruction on a mass scale. Plus, pet geese for all your minions!

Maybe you could put an eyepatch on each goose for some kind of symbolic effect?
No. 611454 ID: 53f127

:drmad: "Yesss... YESSSSSSSS!"

:cysu: "..."

:cysu: "Let's try to get some non-mole people related ideas. I like them and we'll probably end up going with mole people but I don't want to commit to a course of action without hearing the alternatives."
No. 611459 ID: 6e79d4

>we're here to conquer it and install me as its unquestioned dictator.
That means you need to start lying to people. If the ace defenders defend the proles, what will they do when the proles are all a part of your cult of personality?

Find an unstable state or nation, get enough useful idiots to lead a revolution, sweep in and establish the dictatorship. how does 'Cyclops supreme, dearest and eternal leader' sound?
No. 611460 ID: 0f3813

Oh, okay then how about....
No. 611461 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "Whatever else we end up doing I am sending a secondary team to do this goose thing. In fact, have a goose fitted with an eyepatch and brought to me at once. I COMMAND IT!"

:strife: "At once, Supreme one!"
No. 611462 ID: 53f127

>how does 'Cyclops supreme, dearest and eternal leader' sound?

:cysu: "Very good indeed..."
No. 611463 ID: db83ac

We'd recommend more varied animal-themed splicing, but after that episode with the maggot people, I think we should focus our experimentation on areas that are relevant to our current objectives. We need bases, we use mole people. If we need to find stuff we make boar-people, if we need seductresses, we make a cat-duck-girl.

AND BE SURE TO GENE-MAP. Gene-mapping is the art of recognizing genetic patterns - cause and effect, rather than building blocks. If you see how a set of proteins creates a system, you try to recreate the system with a different set of proteins, so that the new set of proteins matches with the rest of your specimen. Remember, splicing is all about manipulating genes to create the optimum biochemistry.
No. 611464 ID: 687279

Okay how about we make a bunch of robotic spiders and have them weave webs to catch planes the world over? We could catch a bunch of important political leaders or scientists and ransom them for world domination!
No. 611468 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "I'm sure Doctor Madman can sort out the technical details."

No. 611471 ID: 2a5390

Secret lizard people that can infiltrate the governments of the world and form shadow governments that answer only to your beck and call?

Alternatively pick up where the CIA left off and make gay bombs. Why? Why not.
No. 611472 ID: db83ac

Make them vampire-sharkmen with said chainsaw teeth and Shoop-Da-Whoop grade lazers in their mouths.

Maximum feral headshot.
No. 611473 ID: 0f3813

Vampires are too risky, it's too easy to get an UV light.
No. 611474 ID: db83ac

Wait, I got it! Fat bombs which make the fat tissue HEAT UP and SHIFT UNCONTROLLABLY, causing their brains to writhe in MADNESS before MELTING IN THEIR SKULLS.

Keep experimenting until you find a way to force excess fat to move into a very specific part of the body.
No. 611476 ID: 256d52

Well, you COULD just build a bunch of giant cyclops robots that shoot death rays from their eyes and use them to carry off all the gold in Fort Knox.

That'd give you a nice nest egg for future villainy.
No. 611484 ID: 53f127

:otto: "Are you serious? We've done that one a hundred times!"

:cysu: "Now now, Otto. Nothing is off the table right now. Remember, we've tried this one and been foiled so many times in the past it might be the last thing they expect us to try this time."

:otto: "General Melchett's gambit..."

:cysu: "Precisely."
No. 611487 ID: 82c018

How about we use a version of the anti-gravity multi-monument theft, except when the Ace Defenders get to the White House they fly in and rescue... an impostor president!
No. 611490 ID: 15c23b

I know how about a satellite in space that launches bombs from orbit making the bombs deadlier, or replace bombs with a laser powered by the sun. And then make more satellites.
No. 611491 ID: 6eb2c1

:cysu: "Now we're really rolling! Looks like it might be YOU who gets first pick of nations to govern in my name."
No. 611495 ID: 0f3813

Okay people time to step up the game.
Multi-stage scheme time is-a-go
The mole people? sure.
sharks? fine
nuclear bombs and spiders? good
What we do is launch all these things at the same time around the globe, stir chaos and while everyone is pullin their hair out trying to figure out what's the deal you go, not for the gold in knox, not the president, but their friggin defense house.
If we are to succeed you must take over the pentagon.
No. 611507 ID: 15c23b

And arm your men with better weaponry to win the ground. May I suggest using chemicals and oil and a special facility to make plasma that will help out in the future. Also bigger guns.
No. 611528 ID: 8f01e8

How many of the giant robot mosquitos were salvageable? Could they be refitted as troop transports for mole people, deploying single file through the oil-extracting proboscis? We could announce the basic plan to the Ace Defenders, and then completely blindside them by omitting just a few key details. Who would ever expect mole people to be air-mobile?
No. 611552 ID: 9ddf68

Sir, i have an idea, the reason none of our plans have worked in the past was because of those damned do gooders the Ace Defenders right? I say before we try to use mole men to steal thing via tunnels we first set up a decoy plan, something to lure them out and have them focus on something that isn't our main plan. Something like us building a fake weather machine to control the worlds weather only to have it be a nuke in disguise so when they come to stop it we nuke them straight to hell and then we can complete our real plans without worrying about those guys showing up. Just staff the area around the bomb with the death robots we usually use so the Defenders won't see through our ploy and that way we don't have to worry about actually sending up staff if we don't fell like going on a recruitment drive to replace loss solders.
No. 611562 ID: 6d4898

WHAT if.

We release a line of food snacks that are made with one part salt, one part sugar and one part pure animal fat, hydromatically designed with just the right balance of snap, crunch and tender savory texture. We package them for kids and create a corresponding line of toys featured in a free tv show viewable on youtube (funded by ad revenue, of course)

We will then take the money we make off these.. Snackables and the web show/ toy line : My Little Mole, resistance is futile, and fund the next endeavor. We will have already won the hearts of the people though their stomachs and their minds through their entertainment. Next we must create total energy dependency.

We already tried to corner the oil market. I suggest we take the money and fund a solar energy bonanza. Tiles on every surface in the sun. Even surfaces that are rarely in the sun. We will make up some malarkey about it being good for 'job creation.' We will make oil obsolete. We will eventually become rich when we create a solar monopoly. We then buy up all other energy providers, creating a total energy monopoly.

Sorry, sir, I am playing the long game. One must consider their long term goals.

If you want to create more immediate chaos, we could put a bar of waterless, ever-lasting soap in the hands of every man, woman, transexual and child. The population boom would drive up the prices on the global food market. Beforehand, we would need to purchase all foods. all the food.

Sorry, another long game plan. ugh. I'll keep thinking.

I got it. We infiltrate PETA and start a campaign to feed all euthanized domestic animals to starving nations and own up to the organization being responsible for thousands of euthanizations!... This isn't really evil. More like neutral good? Chaotic good?
No. 611566 ID: 256d52

>Sir, i have an idea, the reason none of our plans have worked in the past was because of those damned do gooders the Ace Defenders right?
Hang on, hang on. What about building robot duplicates of the Ace Defenders? Have the robots fight the Ace Defenders or commit crimes to frame them. It's a classic!
No. 611573 ID: 5eea01

Didn't we...do that last year? I recall one of them joined the Ace Defenders, just in time for one of them to retire. Bloody terrible timing. Should never outsource programming killer robot doubles, even if it got done a week early just in time for the Ace Parade.

How's our weather control development coming along, anyway? Have we gotten past "causing a slight stir in the air" yet? I was thinking, you know how sometimes fish and frogs get picked up by tornadoes and scattered all over the place? (or was that an urban legend?) Anyway, mutant fish. Or frogs. Maybe robots instead. Delivered by tornado.
No. 611576 ID: 7eb7db

Let´s see, the real reason all our glorious plans fail, are these damned Ace Defenders. We must find a way to deal with them completley and our way to victory is all but assured.

How about instead of planting an imposter President, we instead plant a giant remote controlled bomb directly in the White House. So, when the Aces come and try to .... *gurk* liberate it, they get pulverized togehter with the world greatest monument to their decadent freedom and unnessasary political system.

Alternatively, Time Travel. Have the DR built one and send our best assasin and the Ninja back in time and slaughter the Defenders in their youth.

Other Idea, this one for the giant Robot fans. Lets use one, but instead of it having Lasers of Destruction, let it shoot transformative beams, that changes all it touches into smaller Robots, who then start consuming metals to reach full size. Imagine a self replicating giant giant robot army. Nothing could stop us.
No. 611589 ID: 5eea01

Sounds neat, but...uh. Self-replicating robots never ends well. It's just asking for a petard-hoist. Transformation beams, though. That sounds like an avenue we should explore more.
No. 611602 ID: e0196c

Quick question sir, it's usually the Ace Defenders who defeat us correct? What intelligence do we have as to their operation system?
I rather like the idea of figuring out a plan or two to force them to split their forces, like performing two seperate schemes at once, though this would increase the difficulty of those schemes...
Anti-gravity swipe sounds great, and since we've more or less decided on the mole-people, we can deploy them ahead of time to prep the ground for the anti-gravity swipe.
But that's doubling down on one thing, which means whatever we do that on will have to be our goal...In theory.
What if we deploy the mole-people to several locations that would be beneficial to our cause?
White House, Fort Knox, Part of me wants to hit the Great Wall of China with them...Basically, line up targets across the map for us to hit at our leisure.
No. 611637 ID: db83ac

That depends on how much your stupid enemies think you're insane. If they think you're just a cartoon looney, they'll expect you to do the same things over and over - you know, Einstein's definition of insanity. If they expect you to be unhinged and sociopathic but also focused and determined, then they'll branch out and diversify their strategies to deal with all known possible evil plans.

Either of these extreme views is good for getting them to underestimate you. If they don't see the council change, only the same evil supreme overlord, they won't react to your adaptation despite all the glaring evidence. What we do in reaction to the Ace Defenders is based on HOW WELL WE CAN CON THEM, AND IN WHAT WAY WE CAN BEST CON THEM.

So, here are some ideas off the top of my head:
1. If the Ace Defenders think you're going to do the same things over and over, why not turn a kidnapping into a PR nightmare? Step 1: Create a set of intelligent AIs that are exceptionally suicidal and brooding. Make them partially obedient to your commands, but willing to bomb the local homeless shelter or crowded church if those targets are nearby. Step 2: Dump them on the president's next conference. Step 3: Map out the possible locations that the bombs will reach, and then have your minions desperately attempt to rescue the potential victims. This makes your minions (not you) look like the heroes while the Ace Defenders brood in angst from all the innocents they allowed to die to save the 'President' (more like tyrant King, at this point). Step 4: Kill the senators in plain view, have a squad kill the President's cabinet and make it look like a foreign power did it, and swap a third of the House of Representatives with loyal clones, or mind-control half subtly (they are NOT loyal, just sympathetic, or else someone will take a hint and have them replaced with real representatives).
2. If the Ace Defenders see you as a focused and rational individual, STEP UP YOUR GAME. Multitask various evil plans across the world (we can help with that) and make it look like they're working at cross-purposes. The Ace Defenders may start thinking you've gone insane, are no longer in control, or fighting an enemy civil war with one of your lieutenants. They'll be too busy trying to figure out where all the chaos is coming from, while you focus on a single "instant-win" plan and take them down.
No. 611683 ID: ebe537

If we can't defeat the Ace Defenders through conventional means, then we attack them on the area do-gooders most pride themselves on: their reputation.

How much intel do we have on the Ace Defenders? And how well do we know their weaknesses? Not in terms of combat prowess, but in terms of their private lives and any possible... proclivities. If we can seduce one of them into a moment of moral weakness, we'll be able to establish the basis for a media smear campaign. If we successfully corrupt their image in the public, the damage done to their morale will throw them off their game the next time we butt heads.
No. 611690 ID: 4754ce

I have an idea. You go straight. You go so straight that they think you're doing bad, but when they try to expose you as doing bad, show them how you've been doing nothing but humanitarian efforts and then make THEM look bad.

Then cut their throats, because the straightest razor is the sharpest.
No. 611723 ID: db83ac

If you do that and the Ace Defenders have at least one paranoid survivalist on their team, expect a lot of kamikaze attacks.

Take their honor and murder the 'innocent' with it. Force them to choose between protecting the nation and protecting those who have not actively committed any crime but corrupt others into doing so. The only thing more devastating to your plans than a legion of self-righteous do-gooders are the schemers who define their justice and control them with it. Find people who frequently talk to the Ace Defenders and KILL THEM - they fuel the spirit. Cut out the eyes and ears of their willpower, and the body will flail about before falling into a wall and exploding.

Since you're not the conniving behind-the-shadows type but the proud-overlord type, methinks you should murder everyone who secretly controls the world once you officially take it over. Do us all a favor, good and evil.

Oh, and make some glue-girls! Loyal minions made of slime that can harden to hold stuff that is in the middle of breaking! Should increase the defense in all vehicles and bases.
No. 611744 ID: 53f127
File 141860597536.png - (113.93KB , 600x600 , RotC15.png )

No. 611745 ID: 53f127
File 141860600842.png - (133.57KB , 600x600 , RotC16.png )

No. 611746 ID: 53f127
File 141860606120.png - (116.36KB , 600x600 , RotC17.png )

"We've all been at this for a while. Let's take a break and review what we've got so far..."
No. 611758 ID: c9f2af

Man, we really need to find a new pizza place, that doesn't use cheese that looks like jizz.
No. 611759 ID: 9ddf68

Well it seems that the most poplar vote was using mole men and anti-gravity devises to steal important monuments around the world by making them weightless and stealing them through tunnels we dig ahead of time so they'd never see it coming. Other popular vote seem to be getting rid of the Ace Defenders before or while we set up our mole men plan so we don't have to worry about them while we steal the monuments but I don't think we ever actually agreed HOW we'd do that second part. Might of been some other things but I had to walk out to use the john so if I left anything out I'm sure someone will let us know.
No. 611762 ID: 6e79d4

mole people and/or subterranean tunnels, invade a small country, anti gravity aided government seat and/or monument theft, cause uprisings & fill the subsequent power vacuum, a goose, genetic chimeras, giant robots.
Molemen were popular in conjunction with stealing monuments, but I'm not sure how that'll further our goals.

Ehh, let's call it a probing attack to gauge these aceholes' abilities. We can ransom the monuments or keep 'em, but let's not count the chickens before they hatch.
No. 611770 ID: 6e79d4

..... how are you smoking with that helmet?
No. 611825 ID: 20afaf

Clone armies?
No. 611841 ID: 350a50

Good point. We need to get rid of these pests as soon as possible.

Has anyone tried getting a mole into the Ace Defenders before? I mean, not a mole-man, just the spy and saboteur kind of mole.
No. 611842 ID: 5eea01

Eesh, it's like you don't know the Ace Defenders get even more powerful when you directly threaten their loved ones.

And...sentient glue creatures sounds like they'd be a huge mess to clean up after. And why would you waste time making them look vaguely like girls? I think you're onto something with adhesives, though. Having helplessly glued 'heroes' watch as all they seek to protect crumbles around them while they are unable to do anything fills my heart with glee. I forget if we've tried that before. [flipping rapidly through files]
No. 611843 ID: 350a50

>it's like you don't know the Ace Defenders get even more powerful when you directly threaten their loved ones.
Oh man. Oh fuck. That's brilliant.

We seduce the Ace Defenders' leader and turn him to the dark side!
No. 611868 ID: 8f01e8

There was some talk about better equipment for the low-level minions. Bigger guns, body armor, refitting the mosquitos as flying APCs, that kind of thing.

Figurative mole can also be a literal mole-man. The Ace Defenders probably have some mandatory ethnic-diversity thing, we could take advantage of that.
No. 611869 ID: 53f127
File 141861891360.png - (117.80KB , 600x600 , RotC18.png )

"So, Doctor Madman's like seventy so he went to bed about... Holy shit, five hours ago. We're gonna have to fill him in later, but for now let's take a look at what we've got on the board..."
No. 611870 ID: 53f127
File 141861924230.png - (244.39KB , 600x600 , RotC19.png )

"Okay so, broad strokes, what I'm seeing is us zeroing in on Mole People pretty heavily, strong themes of stealing monuments using anti-gravity, especially the white house. I really like the idea of an impostor president. Some GREAT stuff for destroying those disgusting Ace Defenders. I love the idea of discrediting them somehow. A few other ideas that might warrant future exploration, especially robot spiders... Not up on the board yet is the idea of pretending to go straight, which is a classic.
I think I have enough to work with now.
Von Strife, Otto, you getting all this?"
No. 611871 ID: 53f127
File 141861931262.png - (115.42KB , 600x600 , RotC20.png )

:otto: *grunt*

:cysu: "Von Strife, you still with us over there?"

:cysu: "VON STRIFE!"

:cysu: "..."
No. 611872 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "She's listening."
No. 611873 ID: db83ac

...Are you seriously not connecting the dots here?

Sentient glue slimegirls who glomp onto the Ace Defenders, "harden" up to stop them, and then guilt trip them by making them think that breaking out or heating up in a heroic fashion will kill the poor girls! Who give out puppy-dog eyes through air pockets for eye sockets.

It would take a Heroic Sociopath to defy THAT! And then you can call them out on their lack of empathy for innocently-ignorant little girls.

Of course, if you can design them so that they don't die when melted or crushed, that would be great. Either way, if you condition the girls to be genuinely energetic and optimistic but also fiercely loyal to your organization (and fangirls of the Ace Defenders), they'll get in the way of the heroes and help or protect your repair minions!

Or you could train them to suffocate / constipate the Ace Defenders. Cruel and unusual - just the way the boss likes it. As for the mess, maybe you could create a personal churning transport not unlike a cement truck?
No. 611875 ID: d90668

Give eye patch goose his own battalion and see how it works out. If it does he gets his own villain name. If not the sight of troops being lead by a goose will confuse Ace defenders to no end.
No. 611881 ID: a19cd5

Might be wise to take a quick break, stretch our legs. Sound good to you, boss?
No. 611882 ID: db83ac

You may want to discuss protocol with your minions. Doctor Madman went to sleep because he needs sleep, that's understandable. Your other minions aren't exactly... intimidating us the right way.

I'm worried that one day, Otto is going to accidentally shoot his PDA. Or his hands. Or something far more important. Look, can you make sure that he always keeps his head-magnum unloaded WHEN IT IS LITERALLY POINTED AT HIMSELF? *Controlled voice to not shock Otto*

I suggest that we brainstorm some new ammo types for his gun, something non-lethal but really hard to get up from. How about shooting those glue girls I talked about earlier? (No, shooting molepeople is a cruel and possibly fatal practice, don't fire anyone with bones that can't survive a gunshot - whether they're the bullet or the target)

May as well ask now that we're on break: how does his biochemistry work now that there is a giant gun where his head should be? I mean, is his brain now compactly stored in his torso, in a jar that is connected to his body via communicator, or distributed along his central nervous system?

As for Mistress Von Strife, you got one hell of a bodyguard. What's her backstory? Is she blind in one eye, or is that eyepatch on for some reason? Either way, you'd think that a master of nine martial arts would spend her free time mastering a tenth, or doing something fun/productive other than lazing about. Are you going to do something about that, or is waking her a really bad idea?

I'd ask personal questions about you if you didn't threaten to throw me into a woodchipper or something (How do you usually make "chopped liver" out of fired employees?). So, just to confirm: no questions about your secret identity, or can we get a few facts so that we can plan our tactics better?

Also, thanks for getting us the pet geese, very motivating.
No. 611884 ID: 3fc380

:cysu: "I have enough here to begin formulating a plan. We shall adjourn for now and regroup at 0930 hours tomorrow. Or rather today! Sleep while you can. Soon the real work shall begin..."
No. 611885 ID: b8fa0a

:cysu: "Perhaps you shall learn more about my minions if I decide to keep you around, Kome. Do not think yourself invulnerable just because you have a brilliant mind for evil schemes."
No. 611887 ID: 89b2a2

Why did nobody suggest the reason the Ace Defenders keep winning air combat is because we don't have two eyes and therefore have no way of perceiving depth?
No. 611909 ID: 350a50

They can't win air combat if we're underground. Just another reason the mole-men are genius.
No. 611910 ID: db83ac

*Slowly backs away from 89b2a2*

So... uh... heh... heh... how... about... erm...

What was I...?

Oh right, physics AI. A physics AI who is designed to think up different theories on the forces that govern the universe, and then those theories are tested by another AI who uses concrete data to apply the theories to virtual simulations, and then those theories that seem sound are tested by a third AI who conducts the physical experiment, possibly near a populated area that you want destroyed/dominated?
No. 611914 ID: 9ddf68

right, hit the hay and actually start doing things when we wake up, got it. See y'all in the morning.
No. 611920 ID: ebe537

The way things are looking, our plan is shaping up to have three major goals:
-Secure famous landmarks to terrify and intimidate weakling world governments
-Gain the loyalty of the unwashed masses to ensure a swift transition to the new world order
-Destroy any and all opposition we may encounter while accomplishing said world domination (i.e. the Ace Defenders)

Right now, what we have are a bunch of disconnected ideas that roughly fall into each of these categories. Basically, the completed master plan is a lego set, and we just dumped all the pieces onto the floor. Now we have to find a way to make them all fit together.

Firepower shouldn't be an issue here. From the sound of it, we have plenty of areas to explore vis-a-vis capturing targets: robot spiders, antigravity, subterranean tunnels, what have you. The key to making it all work is finding a way to keep the Ace Defenders distracted, which is why I propose we accomplish the majority of our goals via espionage and subterfuge.

First, we take over major news media outlets. This can be easily accomplished through either bribery or intimidation. We then use our position to cast doubt on the Ace Defenders, raising the suspicions of the public through a series of escalating scandals – questions about their personal lives, allegations of power abuse and embezzlement, what have you.

We can set up the imposter President in advance; the White House already has a network of underground tunnels, so we have a convenient point of ingress should we choose to go the mole people route. Then, with the dummy installed, we can secure the White House with antigravity lifts, using it as a decoy to distract the Ace Defenders while the bulk of your forces silently sets to work on displacing the remainder of the federal government's figureheads.

When the Ace Defenders inevitably recover the White House with the dummy President inside, they'll return it and claim the day won. Let them enjoy their imagined, fleeting victory for a few precious moments. Soon after, every major media outlet cuts to the Ace Defender headquarters, reporting that the real President (placed there by our agents) has been discovered, secretly imprisoned for several months.

After the Ace Defenders’ credibility is destroyed, the President will dedicate every ounce of power at his disposal to eliminating the threat they pose. Once they're out of the way, our plants in the government will assume control and he can easily be brushed aside.
No. 611932 ID: 4754ce

Why not just...you know, go straight. Seriously, just for a few days. Boss, I ask this because if we...exploit the thing called 'kickstarter' to make a bunch of money, we could rob the world of it's money!
No. 611954 ID: 256d52

Motioning that the bird be codenamed 'Cycloops Goose'.
No. 611959 ID: 1f7d45

Guys, what about puppy powered robots?

I mean, just think about.
Nobody wants to hurt a puppy. No hero is going to fight seriously against a puppy. No army is going to wage war against puppies.
And the best part is that animal cruelty is against the law, so the Ace Defenders can't even fight back without committing a heinous crime.

Plus, I think it would do wonders for our public relations. We would be giving homes to America's homeless puppies. That's practically saintlike.
No. 612026 ID: db83ac

I think you have the main crux of the plan!

Here are my thoughts on what needs to be done to pull this off:
1. The R&D labs need to focus on creating whatever is relevant to the plan. Mole people, cloning, anti-gravity, brainwashing, spider robots. Research into anything not relevant to your plans is to be considered break time, but give your scientists the right to have breaks - fat bombs and glue-girls are pretty motivating. Once you finish a step or a plan, finish up the remaining experiments (give them time if the experiment is volatile) related to this step or plan, store the results for future research after you take over the world, and get the R&D labs to work on new projects that are relevant in the next step or plan.
2. It's not going to be easy taking over the government. They likely have countermeasures against diggers and ways of recognizing clones or brainwashing in government members. You need intel on the architecture of the tunnels and political structure of the White House if you're going to pull this off undetected. Make it look like the tunnels were just a support team, and brainwash the cabinet so that they don't seem any different, and even make the same choices, but also subtly change the context of those choices so that they work in your favor.
3. You need a crack team to pull this off. Performing a big con requires a very specific group of specialists who can work together to complete their goals.

We ready yet, or are we still brainstorming?
No. 612028 ID: 3f0c1b

While I do realise the Ace Defenders are mostly airborne, I got an idea for slowing them down while fighting on the ground. They are do gooder types right? Well it's all well and good for them to kill "random evil mooks", but what if all our soldiers wore name tags? I'll admit it's not a master stroke that will win us every fight, but if they hesitate because they realise that instead of hitting "random mook #3638" they are aiming at Bob, then that could cut down on our losses.

Also it might boost morale if you refereed to a mook by name once in a while, makes them feel appreciated and less likely to run away when things get tough.
No. 612111 ID: 350a50

I like it. Promotes loyalty, preys on enemy conscience.
No. 612131 ID: defceb

While we're gathering resources, is it possible to get chairs with headrests? My neck is KILLING me.

Also seconding the motion for the bird to be named 'Cyclops Goose'. This is important!
No. 612237 ID: 53f127
File 141870142008.png - (103.22KB , 600x600 , RotC24.png )

No. 612238 ID: 53f127
File 141870142362.png - (145.73KB , 600x600 , RotC21.png )

"Ah, you're finally back. Excellent!"
No. 612239 ID: 53f127
File 141870142749.png - (192.04KB , 600x600 , RotC22.png )

"As you can see, while you simpletons were sleeping your lives away, I've been hard at work drafting a foolproof plan that will once and for all ensure our total conquest of the globe!"
No. 612240 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "But before I reveal my masterstroke, there's one matter of urgent business to which we must attend first..."
No. 612241 ID: 53f127
File 141870143409.png - (214.28KB , 600x600 , RotC23.png )

"I believe one of you had a complaint about the pizza?"
No. 612242 ID: 9ddf68

eh, it was all right, just think it needed a little more time in the oven but I didn't loss any sleep over it.
No. 612244 ID: a19cd5

What they said, slightly too chewy. And I LIKE my pizza chewy.
No. 612245 ID: 53f127

No. 612246 ID: c0c685


Force him to create pizzas nonstop until he can do it perfectly right every single time.

A personal pizza maker would be useful. Also, if you ARE going to kill him, you have to do it in a fitting fashion, like by baking him into a giant pizza or something.
No. 612247 ID: 687279

Make him eat the leftover pizza still lying around. All of it.
No. 612248 ID: 53f127

:pizzaguy: "P-please don't bake-a me into a pizza!" *sob*
No. 612250 ID: c0c685


THEN DO IT RIGHT NEXT TIME DAMNIT! There will be no other chances after this one, so I suggest you perfect your pizzas and that you do it quickly.

But hey they were still pretty good so I'll still give you a decent Yelp review.
No. 612251 ID: 6e79d4

ugh, just, unfuck yourself and get out of our sight, we have important things to be doing.

Alright Supreme leader, what have you come up with?
No. 612252 ID: a19cd5

I agree with this. Force our pizza chef to start getting serious. at gunpoint.
There are some good scheme-uses for a world-class pizza chef, if he hasn't improved within a week we can start planning ironic executions.
No. 612253 ID: defceb

"3 out of 5, it was a little above murdering the cook level."
No. 612254 ID: c0c685


Done and done.

Alright, what is your foolproof plan Supreme Leader?
No. 612275 ID: 350a50

No, wait. He's no good to us dead, and we don't need him as our cook, he's awful at it.

If he can make food-like objects that look good, but are actually awful, we can use that. We just need a way to get him into the Ace Defenders' favorite pizzeria... we can make them so sick they can't fly their planes!

It's the perfect cover for our anti-gravity devices to keep them from getting shot down!
No. 612277 ID: 9d8b7f

I say keep him alive because he's the only pizza cook we got.
No. 612282 ID: ebe537

I think we have a volunteer for our first wave of hybrid genetic testing! Something involving pigs, if possible.

Feel the pepperoni
No. 612438 ID: 34e91b

Have doctor Madman turn him into a Cyborg Chef so he can make perfect pizzas every time.
No. 612449 ID: d3be40

You're planning on becoming the next ruler of the entire planet. You think people will cheer for your regime if they find out that you kill people for following orders, just because they don't know exactly what you, a supergenius whose secrets must remain hidden, are thinking?

If you make people think you're petty, they'll stop bothering you with minor problems... including extreme gas leaks.

You do NOT want to lose total communication with civilization, even if you murder them on a daily basis. Someone could discover a world-ending problem and be too scared to sound the alarm for any reward.
No. 612472 ID: 5869f6

I agree with him, also the pizza wasn't 'that' bad. I mean, it was better than little fuckin' Caesar's I mean that shit tastes awful when it gets cold.
No. 612564 ID: 53f127


:cysumad: "'Minor problems'? 'MINOR PROBLEMS'?? Perhaps you don't remember what was said, but I do! I remember perfectly!"
No. 612566 ID: 53f127
File 141878175021.png - (220.22KB , 600x600 , RotC25.png )

"At first I dismissed it, a mere trifle. But it stuck in the back of my mind... Popping up again and again like a tape stuck on repeat! Louder and louder like a siren in my brain! Soon I could think of nothing else!

No... no mere incompetence this! This was an act of deliberate sabotage!"
No. 612567 ID: 53f127
File 141878175301.png - (184.96KB , 600x600 , RotC26.png )

"IS THAT IT!? YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD HACK MY BRAIN, PIZZAMAN!? You thought you could halt the advance of CYCLOPS with your pathetic pizza scheme? WELL YOU FAILED! The CIA couldn't get into my mind, what chance does a pathetic little FFFuck like you have? I ought to blow your brains out right now!"
No. 612568 ID: 53f127

:pizzaguy2: "I don't-a know what you're talking about! P-please don't kill me!"
No. 612569 ID: 2ec61a

to the sharks with lasers on their heads!
No. 612570 ID: a2b630

... You know, if he's that bad, you could just send him to sabotage the Ace Defenders, if it's that big of a deal, sir. I'm sure they wouldn't mind mediocre pizza.

That is, of course, unless you've told him anything even vaguely important. Then we just rebuild him as a trash compactor.
No. 612572 ID: 9ddf68

...note to self, keep all non-work related opinions to myself. got it.

Sir, with all do respect, I do believe you may be taking things a bit to far, perhaps instead we should if you feel like you must strike out at something maybe just blow something up to stir things up and let the world you're not to be trifled with. As for what to blow up I suggest something you detest and as for how, either with some kind of guided missile or just have one of your minions simply walk in with a powerful bomb in disguise, have him drop it off, and after he leaves you can push a button and blow the place to hell. You know help relive some of the stress that all this world domination planning can build up.
No. 612574 ID: 687279

Sir, do you have some insecurity about jizz?
No. 612581 ID: defceb

It's 2014, we won't judge you if you liked it.
No. 612618 ID: 589173

Uh...when was the last time you slept?
No. 612621 ID: d3be40

Boss, please put the gun down, imprison the chef, and think about it later. If you still want to kill him after a week, you can do that on your own time. Right now, you look like you're acting on instinct. This is NOT good PR.

You're Cyclops Supreme, Evil Overlord! You're not stupid enough to just charge blindly into any situation without rational thought!

Are you?
No. 612652 ID: a79844

If you kill him then you lose the information on mind screwing pizza, it could prove useful.
No. 612653 ID: 350a50

Isn't extracting information what Von Strife is here for? Maybe the pizzaman should spend some time with her before we jump to conclusions. He could still be useful if he's not a saboteur.
No. 612654 ID: 2ec61a

oh yes, torture the information out of him.
No. 612655 ID: 9d8b7f

You know he is crying so wouldn't that mean that he is telling the truth about the fact that he doesn't know what's going on.
No. 612664 ID: c0c685


Woooah, slow down Supreme Commander. That's some lowly pizza guy we're talking about. Just chain him up in the kitchen and have him make pizzas until he can do it perfect every time. Army runs on its stomach you know? No since wasting a valuable resource for your army.
No. 612666 ID: 0ab5c5

This could be a good jigsaw piece to our master plan. Make him divulge his secrets of sublime mind-controlling pizzas to us, then use that against him to make him want to become a supervillain. Then we install him somewhere he'll definitely cause havoc, and use him as distraction.
Also we should think of franchising our brand of evil organization. If terror groups can do it, why can't we? We're way better than those guys!
No. 612682 ID: ea0ad9

Pizzaguy, you claim you don't know what you did, but in truth, you DO know what you did!
NOBODY makes cheese so cheesy that it strings up and off in such a way that it looks like jizz. YOU USED FAKE CHEESE DIDN'T YOU!?
No. 612691 ID: 8f01e8

O wise and terrible supreme cyclops, how many total hours of sleep have you had in the past month? The productivity concerns you mentioned are legitimate, but this might be one of those cases where it's preferable to sacrifice a bit of efficiency for improved security.

In plainer language, I'm advising you to imprison the cook for the time being, and see if his hacking attempt can be purged with standard countermeasures such as an eight-hour period of unconsciousness. Wouldn't want to send him to his grave with exclusive knowledge of the antidote if it turns out to be something more serious, after all!

We'll look through your notes, catch up on the plan, and do prep work while you're out.
No. 612694 ID: 6ba34f

Insult the pizza mastermind by letting him live, thus implying his mind control tehniques are powerless against your supreme majestic brain!
Now he will have to live all his life knowing he cannot stop you!A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH!
No. 612712 ID: 6630c0

Expanding on that idea:
>Force that guy to endlessy make pizza for your goons.
This will both thwart any future plans of his, but will also improve troop morale and therefore efficiency and loyality! Metaphorically killing about three birds with one stone. If you are into metaphers, that is.
No. 612754 ID: 6868bc

Give him to Doctor Madman with instructions to turn him into a pizza-making genetically altered cyborg monstrosity. A fate worse than death, plus, you get a monster out of it!
No. 612761 ID: d3be40

We're discussing this too much, we look like a free-for-all of the world's fattest idiots.

Can we just put this guy in the dungeon and deal with him AFTER we're done conquering a fraction of the world?
No. 612792 ID: 193b1b

Why are you you questioning the will of Cyclops Supreme? The boss man doesn't want to postpone this matter.

I support the motion to make the pizza guy an indentured servant who will boost morale with his Italian culinary goodness.
No. 612953 ID: b2c9e1

Fuck metaphors let's get some stones and start killing birds...or people dressed like birds works too...hehehehe
No. 612970 ID: 6e79d4

Someone will have to interrogate him later. Let's not let him set back our plans.
No. 619612 ID: 53f127
File 142102758593.png - (167.06KB , 600x600 , RotC27.png )

"Insolent fool!"
No. 619613 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "Now, as for you..."

:pizzaguy2: "..."
No. 619614 ID: 53f127
File 142102758836.png - (47.96KB , 600x600 , RotC28.png )

No. 619615 ID: 53f127
File 142102759105.png - (128.09KB , 600x600 , RotC29.png )

No. 619616 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "..."
No. 619617 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "You know what? You're not even worth it!"

:cysumad: "Take him away! We'll deal with him later."

:cysu: "Right now, we have plans to discuss..."
No. 619618 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "Back to the task at hand, while working last night, I had very nearly completed a perfectly servicable plan to frame the Ace Defenders for the death of the president when something occurred to me:"

:cysu: "Who is the only person on earth more beloved than the President of the United States?"
No. 619621 ID: 72f86e

Oprah Winfrey?
No. 619622 ID: d3be40

*sigh* We don't know. Here's a list of guesses:

The Pope
The Messiah
Whoever won the "Best Actor" award in Hollywood
The current ruler of the world's most powerful dictatorship (we should deal with whoever this is if they aren't you)
Chuck Norris
A fictional popular character designed to shepherd the masses into believing that the current ethics system works (which it doesn't, since we're here)
One of the Ace Defenders
The latest youtube cat celebrity
A random civilian
No. 619625 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "You poor, simple fools. To whom else could I refer but..."
No. 619626 ID: 53f127
File 142102851551.png - (306.66KB , 1200x1200 , RotC30a.png )

No. 619629 ID: c0c685


Woah! Shit. Uh... take some of the napkins from the pizza place till you can get some actual bandages.


If the Ace Defenders were blamed for the destruction of Christmas, even the President would be forced to turn against them. No one would be left in your way. It's genius.
No. 619631 ID: 189a54

But sir, Santa's a huge corporate icon. If we mess up and the death is traced back to us, we'll make a lot of very rich enemies.

Buuuuuuut...if we pull it off, all those angry, rich people will be against the Ace Defenders.... I dunno, if you think our people are smooth enough to pull it off I'm for it.
No. 619635 ID: d3be40


1. Santa Claus rewards faith with material possessions, instead of redemption or friendship. That's a pretty good sign of anti-religion there. We mess this up, and whatever fallout (negative OR positive) happens could end us.
2. We're talking about a guy who gives presents to all the children (and a few childlike adults) in the world. There are two theories about this:
2A. Santa Claus ignores entire continents or gives out cruddy, dangerous presents to third-world countries. There are people who hate Santa Claus.
3. Beginning any sort of expedition into an environment we are unfamiliar and unadapted to will likely cause massive casualties, wasted expenses, and a general drop in loyalty from your squadmates.

... Will you PLEASE get some sleep?

Look. We might be able to send out an expedition to both Arctic regions in the future, with intent of specialized experiments and plans. But for all intents and purposes, let's just conquer someplace NICE right now.
No. 619636 ID: 6e79d4

The Immortal Kris Kringle? The one that can be anywhere and nowhere all at once? The one who gives orders to Krampus? The one watching us right now?!?

C-can't we try for Fort Knox again?
No. 619638 ID: d45ea1

But, sir, according to my research, Santa isnt real Jesus Christ are we really working for this guy is some kind of freaky extradimensional alien. That's how he delivers all the presents and hides the workshop. Do we have freaky extradimensional technology yet? How are we supposed to catch him?
Unless you want to activate
Project GRINCH?
No. 619639 ID: defceb

Can I get a doctor? I think I'm bleeding out...

Also, if we can't get the real Santa Claus maybe we can use a fake Santa?
No. 619641 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "World domination is an audacious goal. An audacious goal requires an audacious plan."

:cysu: "Actually, that's OPERATION: GRINCH."

:cysu: "And you will all be convinced when you hear my plan..."
No. 619642 ID: 53f127
File 142103105753.png - (82.80KB , 800x600 , RotC30b.png )

"Phase 1: genetically engineered mole-men will burrow into Santa Claus's secret base at the North Pole..."
No. 619643 ID: 53f127
File 142103105990.png - (86.47KB , 800x600 , RotC31.png )

"Phase 2: our forces storm the facility, sewing chaos and throwing whatever forces Santa has to defend himself into disarray..."
No. 619644 ID: 53f127
File 142103106022.png - (125.39KB , 800x600 , RotC32.png )

"Phase 3: Our repurposed mosquito robots puncture the surface with their suction nozzles. Our forces will take the captured elves and feed them up the tubes where they will be secured in the mosquitoes holding tanks..."
No. 619645 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "I know some of you might be skeptical, but the rewards far outweigh the risks. Consider this:"

:cysu: "Santa Claus occupies a hidden base at the North Pole that is undetectable by even the most sophisticated means. He controls a manufacturing capacity sufficient to supply all the children of the world with presents within a single year, and a sleigh capable of reaching every point on Earth within a single 24 hour period."

:cysu: "If CYCLOPS were to seize control of these resources... we would be... UNSTOPPABLE!"
No. 619646 ID: 53f127
File 142103106324.png - (109.86KB , 600x600 , RotC33.png )

No. 619647 ID: 687279

Brilliant plan, sir.
No. 619648 ID: 6e79d4

How will we frame the Ace defenders for this, though?
No. 619650 ID: 53f127

:cysumad: "Fool! If we seize the North Pole, the Ace Defenders will be of little consequence!"
No. 619651 ID: d45ea1

As always, I'm all aboard with this fucking retarded I mean really now spectacular plan! But, we need to consider a few things.
If Santa can produce enough toys for the world's children, how do we know he hasn't also been producing enough weaponry for an army of soldier elves?
It's well known that Santa's devices run on Christmas Cheer. How are we going to keep up a steady supply?
And, most importantly, why are you such a petulant manchild, and how do your checks keep passing? if we can't detect it, how will our Molemen find the place?
No. 619652 ID: c0c685


I only have two questions Supreme Commander.

First off, why Mole men? Why not just build tanks or some other combat vehicle with drills on it? That way we can be sure to have absolute control over them. Monstrosities created by science can be.... fickle.

Secondly... do we even know where the base is? I mean, with our forces we could scour the North Pole from one end to the other and find it eventually I'm sure... but still. We have to find it first right?
No. 619654 ID: 6e79d4

We agreed the purpose of the plan was to smear the Aceholes reputation! We don't need some toy factory in the middle of nowhere!

Don't worry, it's only 9 millimeter.
No. 619655 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "What's all that muttering over there, Curt? If you have something important enough to share, please, speak up for all to hear!"

:cysu: "You have answered your first question with your second: it must be mole men because only mole men have sensitive enough noses to detect what modern science has so far failed to locate. I'll admit no ordinary mole men will do. For this mission we will need... STAR NOSED MOLE MEN!"
No. 619656 ID: 53f127

:cysumad: "We?? I am supreme commander! I decide what 'we' agreed!"
No. 619658 ID: d3be40

No. 619659 ID: d45ea1

Just chatting with 6E79D4, sir. Was asking him if he was going to fuck Ricardo later.
Also just commenting that you must've been the perfect child, sir.
No. 619660 ID: 53f127

:cysu: "I was a supremely gifted child."

:cysu: "In any case, now that I've done basically all your work for you, I shall retire to my chambers. Otto will remain behind to provide you with executive guidance. You can iron out the details with him. Otto?"

:otto: "By your command! HAIL CYCLOPS!"

:cysu: "Otto's in charge. Whatever you feel like doing, ask him. I have important matters to which I must attend!"
No. 619661 ID: 189a54

Have a good rest, sir.

Oh hai, Otto.

...So how on earth do you think he comes up with these crazy ideas, man?

No. 619662 ID: c0c685


Ooh, alright. So, Otto, could we take 5 and get some help for Apollo? Dudes gettin blood everywhere.
No. 619663 ID: d3be40

Hello Otto. Erm, do you want us to call you something else?

Look. I get that we're lacking in the sanity department. Mostly because the Ace Defenders take the time to grind this organization's sanity into the dirt, and then fire whatever UN-approved (a.k.a. bribed/outsmarted) ordinance they have at said sanity as they chase us into broken down bases with quivering minions.

But the boss came up with a highly impractical plan. Even if this plan seems awesome, there is too much risk and a high chance of casualties / wasted resources, even if we pull it off.

Can you talk to him later? Not about the plan per-se, but about getting some sleep?
No. 619665 ID: 330ce5

I would like to watch mole men be created, or name the eye patched goose Jerald.
No. 619667 ID: 6e79d4

...who the hell is Ricard-

oh for fuck's sake, whatever. Otto, CYSUP's laid out the broad strokes, so I guess our freedom to not fuck up lies in the details. How are we going to take over this place going in blind, while keeping the aceholes out of it?
No. 619671 ID: 53f127

:otto: "I'm sure Doctor Madman will be happy to attend to Apollo's wounds..."

:drmad: "HeheheHEHEHEeheheHEHHEheeeheeee!"

:otto: "Like many geniuses, Cyclops Supreme is unappreciated in his time. To the untermenchen we seek to conquer, he no doubt seems a madman."

:otto: "The Supreme One's sleep schedule is a closely guarded secret. Such information would be extremely valuable to his many enemies."

:otto: "As for his plan, are we all going to work together and finish his presidential kidnapping scheme, or do you guys want to go with the Christmas thing?"
No. 619672 ID: a19cd5

Hey madman, make sure to give him robot bits. Always need more robot bits.
As for what plan, why not both? Cause some REAL chaos!
No. 619674 ID: 687279

Christmas. Let's find out if Santa's real.
No. 619675 ID: c0c685


I vote we go for the President. It could serve as a distraction while we get ready to take over the north pole.

Also I don't much care for scientifically engineered monstrosities. No offense Doctor. They creep me out.
No. 619679 ID: defceb

uhhh.. you know what? I feel better already. Yeap, no need to for Madman here. I'm sure the artery will close itself no problem Riotmode save me

I vote for maximum molepeople and maximum Christmas.
No. 619681 ID: a79844

Why not send out Mole men to scout for Santa while kidnapping the president. Speaking of which what are the physical capabilities and numbers of our molemen?
No. 619682 ID: 6e79d4

Presidential plan. There's a lot that can be done with or around the president, some tundra town full of little people is of no tactical consequence.
No. 619683 ID: d9999b


...maybe get that leg replaced with a gun?

so, Otto. how do you reload your, uh, head?
No. 619684 ID: 53f127

:otto: "Considering you all just made molemen up yesterday, their physical capabilities and number are both zero."

:drmad: "They will possess a hideous strength, and their numbers shall be beyond counting! HAahahahehehehehahaahHAAhAhEHEee!"
No. 619686 ID: 01745f

I favor he president plan, since I fear that Santa's singularly vast intelligence network makes an attack on his base incredibly risky. He would know, and then he would have his forces, or worse the Ace Defenders, waiting in ambush by the time we are ready to attack.

>Also I don't much care for scientifically engineered monstrosities.
I do! They're delightfully creepy.
No. 619688 ID: ea0ad9

You know, since we don't even have the molemen to get to Santa yet, let's just go nab the president.
No. 619689 ID: 330ce5

Mole men are simply not enough to take down Santa, we need to collect more power. For now kidnapping the president sounds like a more plausible goal.
No. 619690 ID: d3be40

President plan as primary purpose.

We can do a bunch of other sub-missions but I vote that we dedicate most of our resources (and some of our sub-missions) to the president plan.

... Say, how much power do you two have around here? And how much do you know about Von Strife?

And of course, we'd like to see the Ninja now.
No. 619709 ID: 3f0c1b

Let's focus on the presidential kidnapping and hope the boss forgets about the whole Christmas factory thing.
No. 619713 ID: 5869f6

I have an idea!
Now i don't want our organization suffering any unneeded casualties, but i have heard of a few radical terrorist cells in the states.
Now, of we can convince them to launch an assault in open daylight on the White House, we can use that distraction to kidnap the president! Of course, we'll need to give them weapons, but nothing much. Just some old AK's or something. They aren't big on brains, but they're doped up to the eyeballs in brainwashing and propaganda.
No. 619753 ID: 350a50

Nobody sees the Ninja.

The Mad Doctor will need time to develop the molemen to the Supreme One's standards. Let us steal the president while we wait.
No. 619755 ID: 69ab8d

We can't go after Santa. It's January, not December. Obviously, you have to go after him before Christmas, not after.

So we've got 11 months to stall the boss while we're "working on that" and hope he forgets it.
No. 619759 ID: a19cd5

Kome, no dating in the workplace. C'mon man, that's like workplace etiquette 101.
No. 619773 ID: defceb

Somehow I don't think normal workplace etiquette applies here.
No. 619898 ID: 8eaf35

What do we plan to do with the elves once they're captured? We could use them as genetic experiment fodder, I suppose, but their work ethic and servitude is unmatched. I propose we put them to work on mining and weapons manufacturing.
No. 619902 ID: e9d092

Sure it doesn't, but she is still our superior in a way. We should respect at least that.
No. 619903 ID: e9d092

That's why the plan is brilliant - nobody will suspect sabotaging the holidays 11 months in advance!
No. 620003 ID: 350a50

Fool! If we cross the elves with our molemen, that relentless work ethic will at least double the tunneling speed and endurance of our molemen.
No. 620011 ID: 8f01e8

Even apart from the actual element of surprise, it's been established that Santa's infrastructure runs on christmas cheer, which is only available in industrially-significant quantities during the two months between Halloween and New Years, plus sometimes a brief period in July. Outside of that, any defenses he has would likely be at low alertness, if not outright mothballed, to conserve stored power. Right after crunch time, and in the middle of winter no less, everybody's going to be catching up on sleep and other personal maintenance. They're also likely to be bringing in supplies and raw materials to start on the next years' batch of toys, logistical requirements of which might compromise their stealth.

Doctor Madman, how quickly can you whip up a 'working prototype' mole-man? Hideous strength is all well and good as a design goal, but if we're going to have them searching through pack ice and the floor of the North Sea by hand, on a strict timetable, we'll need performance numbers that can only come from real-world testing. Also, they'd probably need to be fitted with SCUBA gear, unless you can work in oxygen storage and pressure resistance like certain aquatic mammals have. They'll need uniforms, in any case, and possibly body armor, which can't be fitted without knowing size and shape.

If molemen are going to be the tip of the spear, and I think we're pretty committed to that idea, the rest of the plan can't come together in useful detail until we know their capabilities. Repairing and refitting the mosquitos is a lower priority if they're basically just going to be used to carry the loot afterward.

I mean, do we even need to carry away the elves, if the whole idea is capturing Santa's facility intact for our own use? Skilled workers, and even lower-level managers, are effectively another part of the facility. If we get really lucky, once we're in, fixed defenses are down, and Kringle's tied to a chair with a bag over his head, Cyclops Supreme might be able to just pin a card that says "ANTA" onto his own existing uniform and have the elves start accepting his orders without thinking about it.
No. 620032 ID: 0f3813

Nonsense! you obviously require a transplant leg, a new leg, a BIONIC LEG!

On the molemen, if they are to possess hideous strength training is in order to make them use their strength wisely and because having a phalanx of molemen sounds awesome.
No. 620057 ID: cef479


So uh, I've been kinda sleeping with my eyes open this whole time, but I heard "Mole People" like five times. If we're going to train Mole People we'll clearly need high powered mole steroids of some kind. Or fruit. It's healthy.
No. 620059 ID: a19cd5

Haha, what? Dude, after you ate my pie out of the fridge last thursday I ain't doin SHIT for you. Good luck with the radical new robot leg, though, man!
Mine are great, they have like
rocket boosters and shit.

President, then. We don't have the resources for Op Grinch yet.
No. 620094 ID: 4d626e

Otto, sir, I've been thinking. If Cyclops Supreme so readily believed our story about the molemen, that apparently don't exist yet, does that mean we might be chasing a figment of imagination with Operation Grinch? There are many in this world who claim that Santa doesn't exist.

Not that I'm questioning the mental maturity of our leader, mind you.
No. 620104 ID: 03c5b0

If Santa does not exist in the first place, then the solution is simple: we make him exist first, THEN we can take him out.
After all, if we can capture the personification of that jolly holiday spirit, we can wreak havoc with anything else. Capturing the spirit of competition? The spirit of independence? The Spirit of St. Louis? Childsplay compared to GrinchOp.
No. 620105 ID: cef479


My friend, I think dear Otto means that they don't exist YET. We have giant mosquito robots after all, mole people are far from impossible for us to create I'm sure. As suggested earlier we may want to start with the President and work our way up to St. Nick.
No. 620107 ID: 4d626e

Check your ears, friend. The question isn't whether Doctor Madman is capable of creating them. The problem is that Cyclops Supreme has a council filled with people who, it turns out, don't know basic facts about the world and he trusts their misinformation.

That is quite worrisome from career perspective as our own incompetence might be our downfall. Into the shark tank.

So...we're going to waste organisation's resources to save our skins? Well, that's foolproof plan if I ever heard one.
No. 620113 ID: cef479


I count one empty ear and one with an AV cord in it. Idea, what if we tell our great leader that the president IS Santa Claus? We take out two birds with one stone and we don't get melted.
No. 620145 ID: 330ce5

But the president doesn't live at the North Pole, could we still pull it off if we say he relocated?
No. 620147 ID: 189a54

I'd bet we could! I'll gladly back this idea if the rest of you lot will.
No. 620152 ID: cef479


We just need to convince his supremeness that he spends his off time as the president, it's his way of hiding himself from the public before that magical Christmas night or something. We're gonna move up the corporate ladder and away from the acid bath with this one boys.
No. 620157 ID: 8f01e8

>The problem is that Cyclops Supreme has a council filled with people who, it turns out, don't know basic facts about the world and he trusts their misinformation.

It was a brainstorming session. The whole point is coming up with new ideas, getting out of the conceptual rut, approaching some problem from a different perspective where it might be easier to solve. Cyclops Supreme understands that molemen don't already exist. Well... I hope he does.

On a related note, Otto, how much information do we have about the Ace Defenders' resources and agenda? The whole "Foiled again!" bit makes it seem like a lot of previous plans have worked adequately well right up to the point where they got involved, then fallen apart completely.

Personally I think blatant lying to the boss would be MORE likely to get us melted.
No. 620158 ID: cef479


Right now the entire "make the President Santa Claus" plan is more of a back-up in case we can't get our paws on molemen of any kind.
No. 620164 ID: 46df9e

So is there anything Doctor Madman needs in order to create the Mole men, we could just get supplies ready. Even if Santa can't be hunted by Mole men or doesn't exist we still want the mole men don't we?
No. 620172 ID: ee14c6


:skrakar: Certainly. They will most likely have uses in many a situation beside keeping our endeavours PG-13.
No. 620182 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: Could we give the moles laser eyes or super heated claws? Not only would the mole men become bigger threats to our enemies but they could effectively burrow through ice at the north pole.
No. 620190 ID: d3be40

Hey Doc? Can we see your R&D labs and scientist team? I would feel better about Cyclops Supreme's spontaneity if we had the scientific resources to turn chaotic rulership into an organizational strength.

Also, we'd like to see the progress you've already made on our propositions; the mole people of course, the newest upgrades to the robot mosquitoes, the strength of our most intelligent AI, properties of new chemicals and raw materials, the tech tree for our genetic modification research, the number of physics professors we've utterly outsmarted, and a general estimate of our overall intelligence assets compared to the Ace Defenders and the rest of the world.

Also, do you want us to call you something other than Doctor Madman? Because we're fine with calling you Doc or Cycho.
No. 620222 ID: 53f127
File 142120175326.png - (97.37KB , 600x600 , RotC34.png )

>How do you reload your head?
No. 620223 ID: 53f127
File 142120176613.png - (98.70KB , 600x600 , RotC35.png )

No. 620226 ID: 5869f6

Also, I have another idea! What if we made rocket-launcher toting cyborg robots that are nigh-perfect replicas of our beautiful leader? Just smart enough to aim, walk and shoot. As well as following commands. With subtle differences to tell them apart from the real thing, like a different color scheme! AND, if they're critically damaged, they advance toward an enemy and explode in shrapnel and wires!
No. 620227 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: *clap clap clap*
No. 620228 ID: 6e79d4

...I've got a whole list of questions now, but foremost, why did you opt for a pistol design instead of a recoilless rifle or something?
No. 620234 ID: a79844


:HH: Because Badassery.
No. 620243 ID: cef479

:miasmamini: Oh geeze, I hope the steam doesn't hurt. It kinda looks like it'd hurt.
No. 620244 ID: c0c685

:cygnus: Well, that's something. Impressive.

So... did we agree on going with the President plan? I think the majority of you voted for that.
No. 620322 ID: a0ee0b

:skrakar: We can all agree this is wizardry and that it is awesome. Though now I wonder what is your ammo capacity and which of your organs are displaced, Otto.

:skrakar: Yes, as long as it doesn't involve deceiving Cyclops Supreme with outright lies. Can we spare some time on the side to work on the Christmas plan to keep our liege happy?
No. 620327 ID: cef479

:miasmamini: Don't forget if we're trying not to lie to him we have to deliver on our promise of mole people.
No. 620371 ID: a19cd5

:RIOT: 10 bucks says otto's part of the Borg collective like me. Goddam radical bodymod there, otto.

So, I say we keep the santa plan on file for when we have the resources, and the president plan for an immediate thing to get rid of the shitty freedom hero guys.
Actually got a plan for that, it involves kidnapping one of them, sticking them in a room with an instant-activation masherplate for a ceiling, then waiting for them to get in there and try to rescue them and hitting the mashy-mashy button.
No. 620375 ID: a0ee0b

:skrakar: That's a good idea, keeping the Operation Grinch as a long-term plan.

But the plan to get rid of Ace Defenders seems...unpolished at best. There's always a meathead capable of superhuman bouts of strength or an improbably knowledgeable technomancer with gadgets that would make such a trap useless, even if it's instantaneous.

Wouldn't it be better to do some research and go after their loved ones, kill some of them while kidnapping the rest as bargaining chips and/or sacrifices for the dark powers that be? Heck, we could sacrifice those we intend to murder on the spot to get on the good side of transdimensional horrors beyond the thin walls of the Materium. Just suggesting.

And concerning pizza...How did we get it here? Wasn't this a top-secret base? I really hope it wasn't delivered and if it was, that we disposed of the delivery boy without giving him a tip.
No. 620380 ID: cef479


:miasmamini: Nyah, we should get our own private pizza delivery operation.

As for dealing with the Ace Defenders we should get as much information as possible to see what sort of skill sets they have in comparison to us. If we know their strengths we'll also be able to learn their weaknesses, and if we have their weaknesses we'll be able to formulate a purrfect plan to crush them like the mice they are.
No. 620397 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: So how do we get this intel, do we just google them? Maybe we should send an agent undercover to gather juicy details about the defenders. Once enough about the enemy is know, we strike and hit them where it hurts!
No. 620398 ID: a0ee0b

:skrakar: Actually, Google would be a good place to start. They ARE celebrities in a way, right? Whatever journalists couldn't find out for us should be what Cyclops sends agents to discover.
No. 620406 ID: 41fd27

Yes! We shall google the defenders!
Then we shall do something with this new information and take over the world!
Then vodka time!
No. 620408 ID: d3be40

We should get started. We'll wait for the boss before firing any long-term plans, but there's stuff to do and science to discover.

Doc, get started on a mole man template; start with a single, well focused prototype and we'll give you advice on how to proceed with the research; we might not know the science, but if you give us options for gene mapping different sets of traits we'll recommend what paths to take. We expect our first option in mole-man traits by next week, and sooner if you are capable. After that (and the obligatory firing of your most incompetent interns), give us a list of your science team members and their fields of study. We should be able to micromanage them to synchronize their work with Cyclops Supreme's current plans and the organization's main and sub goals.

Otto, can you give us a list of military personnel, starting from rank Captain? We'll also want a list of grunts that the captains formally recommend (each captain recommends three lower-ranked personnel, not necessarily the best but the ones whose addition to the organization causes a high increase in military strength, possibly greater than their worth as an individual grunt). Our main goal is to form squads that can go on sub-missions while the boss works on the main plans for world domination. There's a lot of potential in specialist soldiers, potential that will be wasted if you throw all the good soldiers into suicide missions. Better we equip our top soldiers and have them pave the way for world domination.

So, can we wear our new pet geese on our heads?
No. 620454 ID: 350a50

>And concerning pizza...How did we get it here? Wasn't this a top-secret base? I really hope it wasn't delivered and if it was, that we disposed of the delivery boy without giving him a tip.

The pizza guy worked for us, he had a CYCLOPS logo on him.
No. 620491 ID: cef479


:miasmamini: Wait wait, so we've had a purrivate pizza delivery service this entire time!? Madness! Truly we're working for the right side here guys.
No. 620500 ID: 4fb3af

We could have a wicked pizza party later on.
But, with having this whole pizza and defenders thing brought up.
Can we send pizza to their base to their base like in prank calls so that they have to give us money?
No. 620507 ID: ea0ad9

Only if we've got some cookie bakers over here, too, man. Pizza and Cookies.
No. 620528 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo:Cookies and pizza are nice, but potaos are where it's at! Chips, french fries, mashed potaos, and so much more. Potaos are the ultimate food!
No. 620548 ID: 2ae7d5

Did the meeting just degrade into talking about pizza and cookies? Hello, plans for world conquest going on over here, focus people!
Now how big are we going to make the moles and are they going to be cyborg mutants or regular mutants?
No. 620551 ID: 6f1700

:skrakar: Since we're talking about mole PEOPLE and mole MEN, I'm guessing they'll be roughly man-sized, probably on the manlet end of the scale to ensure we can easily dispose of them if they decide to turn on their creators.

And diss not the pizza for it is a worthy topic to discuss as one of few digressions thatkeep the mind relaxed and fresh for new brainstorms.
No. 620574 ID: 8d99f5

Relax, I have nothing against pizza, I just wanted to know if the molemen will be cyborgs?
Also can we name one of them Saul?

Also the meat lovers pizza only had three types of meat when I thought it would have four.
No. 620581 ID: 41fd27

Saul is a great name for a mole man/person.
And while we are at it. Why not make him a ninja that shoots lasers too.
Perhaps even hook up some missiles while you are at it.
And if we are going to kidnap the president it might give us a chance to test Saul the Anti Everything Moleman.
No. 620602 ID: ea0ad9

Are you sure it was actually meat lover's, and mot meat triad? I sure didn't see any receipts, seeing as they were made by our personal chef and we didn't buy them!
No. 620606 ID: cef479

:miasmamini: Purrhaps we could use Saul in a different way than the enemy would think. I suggest we use our test moleman as a distraction while a group of our soldiers use the chaos to take the purresident. The Ace Defenders will be so busy dealing with Saul that they'll leave the purresident more than vulnerable to an extraction team, nyah?
No. 620611 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: Yes, and we'll call it operation secret tunnel! Something had been on my mind though, are we the only villain group? We can't be they only ones that want to rule the world. So I want to identify and destroy any competition.
No. 620617 ID: 41fd27

If we are going to use Saul the Yet to Exist Moleman as a distraction we might as well cover him in bright lights with a ton of snakes backing him up.
Snakes can be very distracting when a ton of them are all after you at the same time.
So there will a be a distraction for our distraction!
That is if we can even get Saul The Destroyer of Fluffy Kittens and Orphans
No. 620623 ID: 94b817

Or instead of snakes we can yous spiders! Or both. OR WE COULD MUTATE THE TWO TOGETHER!! Doctor madman do you think you could do that?
No. 620624 ID: 6bba8f

:skrakar: Wouldn't Anti Everything also mean Anti-Cyclops? I vote against shooting ourselves in the foot.

:skrakar1: Let's go one step at a time. A functional mole man prototype first, upgraded mole soldiers with snakes and spiders later. No need to make the initial task more complex than it needs to be.
No. 620626 ID: d45ea1

:Curt: You go take a nap for just a while, and this is what happens? Talking about the fucking pizzas? Come on guys, we're hired to be a shadowy board of idea men for a reason. Now, I think we all agree this stealing Santa malarkey is idiotic, but that "Steal the president" idea from earlier was pretty good, I say. We have the mole men cooking already, and we can re-purpose those mosquito bots. Maybe we could... we could use the molemen to dig up the foundations of the White House, and then dig a tunnel into it! So we send in an operative to steal the president and replace him with an actor. Then, we use the mosquito bots to pick up the White House, which we can probably do since we can order the mole men to basically just dig it up, and then transport it somewhere, and the Ass Defenders come to try and save the president, and then

I dunno, we blow it up? Some shit like that. And meanwhile we can just chill with the president I guess.
No. 620627 ID: 41fd27

I was mainly joking around with the titles.
You raise a valid point though, but I still think a wave of biting satan spawn is pretty distracting.
Here is a simple plan though.
We take the president all stealth like.
then we replace him with an actor like Curt said. Start setting up a puppet government!
That is boring though. This moleman plan has a ton more explosions.
I liked the Santa Idea a bit! I think the boss would like it better if we went with his plan.
After all if this president plan fails horribly I don't want to be in that vat of acid.
Also if we do the Santa plan and it fails. Worse case. We are looking at Santa not being real.
Best case. Santa is real and we get a ton of working room for new plans and free cookies.
No. 620629 ID: 46df9e

I just had a weird thought. Santa has some pretty powerful surveillance right? He's supposed to at the very least know when you're sleeping and when you've been bad so couldn't Cyclops Supreme be under attack from Santa's little helpers right now?
No. 620676 ID: 4cae69

Don't be silly, you know that Santa can only act at Christmas day, right? And the worst thing they can do is send you a piece of coal if you're a bad guy. I should know, I've been utilizing that free coal to power my own contraptions.

Although it does make me wonder, that the rumored workshop of the Santa isn't actually at the North Pole at all. It might be something more akin to a pocket dimension that only connects during Christmas day - I suspect the portal might be located at the North Pole.
Question is, how do we activate it outside of Christmas?
No. 620681 ID: 46df9e

We could create a plan to infiltrate the postal system, they have to do something with children's letters to Santa and it would be pointless to deliver them on Christmas day after Santa has already begun his deliveries.
No. 620685 ID: 8d99f5

Or we could replace Santa with a double and use him to install mind control chips in all the toys. No wait...didn't someone already try that?
Regardless I'm split between the Santa idea because I'm thrilled at the chance to punch and elf and the molemen idea because there's a chance for cyborgs, and no fucks are given about the president idea because he has lost so much political sway of late and polatics is boring. Oh and can the spidersnakes also be part bee?
No. 620686 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: If we are fusing animals, how about the fusion of a honey badger, a bear, and a falcon. That creature would super deadly!
No. 620689 ID: d45ea1

:curt: Wait! The postal system, that's it! We mail Santa an envelope full of cyanide and tracking devices! It's cheap, simple, fuck, we could do it right now! And then, absolute WORST case, we lost, what, fifty dollars and five minutes?
No. 620691 ID: 8f01e8

Skip the cyanide. Killing the fat man (if that would even work, he probably has elves to handle menial stuff and serve as an ablative defense against the simpler assassination tecnhiques) gets us nothing; the plan is to capture his base. So, we write up letters to Santa on paper with integrated GPS chips, drop them in the mail from different parts of the world, and watch where they go while the molemen are in development. That way, even if a pocket dimension or something IS involved, we at least find out where the entrances are and get some clues about his logistics.
No. 620807 ID: 53f127
File 142155598267.png - (152.20KB , 600x600 , RotC36.png )

"Alright, everyone. Let's settle down."
No. 620808 ID: 53f127

:otto: *pshhhs*

:otto: "You! Bring us the intel files on the Ace Defenders at once!"

:grunt: "By your command, sir!"

:otto: "The pizza came from the base canteen. They don't normally deliver but of course they will make an exception for the Supreme One."

:otto: "Maybe ideas to consider for future endeavors. We've already completed the brainstorming process; there's no point in starting over from scratch. How about we take a look at Cyclops Supreme's plans for the President job before we pick a course of action?"

:otto: "Of course not that's ridicu-"
No. 620809 ID: 53f127
File 142155599320.gif - (17.83KB , 250x250 , RotC37.gif )

No. 620810 ID: 53f127

:otto: "The alarm is coming from Cyclops Supreme's quarters!"
No. 620812 ID: cef479

:miasmamini: We need to check on the Supurreme one! There could be a Krampus in there or something!
No. 620814 ID: 350a50

Quickly, to the Supreme One's Bedroom!
No. 620824 ID: a79844

:HH: To his quarters...........which way are they?
No. 620825 ID: ea0ad9

(We have the best collection of advisors, ever. Nobody can beat Lord Cyclops' advisor set!)
This is ridiculous. Tell me the Ace Defenders don't have a short guy dressed in green and white with red and white stockings, that fights with cast steel canes painted like candy-canes. They do, don't they?
No. 620826 ID: 53f127

:otto: "Not since we killed Sgt. Jimmy Noel two years ago."
No. 620827 ID: c0c685


Lets not delay! Send in the troops to secure the area while we go check on Cyclops Supreme.
No. 620859 ID: a19cd5

:RIOT: Ooh! Ooh! Dibs on Kool-aid man-ning the door in!
No. 620862 ID: d3be40

I can support your breach with sniper fire. You okay with that?
No. 620866 ID: 189a54

:tavvy: Shit, please tell me this is our ninja doing ninja-y things or something and not an actual attack on that idi---on our glorious leader.
No. 620884 ID: 5869f6

OH FUCK OH FUCK we need to help him! *pulls out a German Mauser pistol* If he get's captured we're out of a job! *runs off, before shortly running back* Which way is the glorious leader's room? (P.S. If you need a visualization of my person, just imagine a Wehrmacht officer's uniform /w overcoat,with a sort of skeleton motif or some shit i dunno.)
No. 620888 ID: d267c5

I'll delegate three of my dog cyborg mercenaries to sweep the area after Mr. Riotmode there takes the breach. Meanwhile, I'll sweep the alarm system to check if this was just a ruse... I have a feeling our base is compromised, if not physically, cybernetically.
No. 620889 ID: 46df9e

Please tell me we aren't all expected to fight, I at least was hired specifically as a shadowy adviser, I literally have only ever held a real gun only twice and have never fired one at a live target.
No. 620890 ID: 52741d

:skrakar1: "Don't take your magic staff to the meeting, honey. It would be rude to look more villainous than your boss." That's the last time I listened to my wife about workplace etiquette. At least I still have my sacrificial daggers on me. I could summon some eldritch abominations to aid our liege if there are volunteers. Anyone? Dik-Dik, Miasma, I'm looking at you two.
No. 620891 ID: cef479


:miasmamini: I'll have to pass, I plan to live out all nine of my lives without disemmeowlment if you don't mind. Besides, we should be focusing on killing our enemies, not each other.
No. 620893 ID: d45ea1

:Curt: Quickly! To his quarters! I'll be right behind you!
Specifically, behind that Riotmode guy. He looks like he can take a bullet or ten.
No. 620898 ID: e63a4b

:kingmomo: What is security doing?!? Doesn't our amazing leader have any bodyguards? There are flashing red lights and loud noises everywhere, we must do something.
No. 620915 ID: fd5923

:skrakar: Why do all assume there will be killing whenever I mention sacrifices? There are many types of sacrifice that do not require ending a life, you know. Like food or blood sacrifice.

But it's nice to know who here wouldn't lay his life for Cyclops Supreme.
No. 620916 ID: 890dfb

blood in exchange for power? Hell yes.
No. 620917 ID: 7aa8c3

I'll stay here, the last time I went into sombodys bedroom because it was an "emergency" I had night terrors for three weeks.
No. 620946 ID: cef479


:miasmamini: Look we can discuss this later right now we have a purrtential crisis, we won't be able to do anything for our leader if he's been slain.
No. 621000 ID: d45ea1

:curt: Wait, didn't he say he was in constant contact with us through a radio in his helmet?
Uh, let's see if this works.
Hey, what's going on over there?
No. 621007 ID: ce87f0

:skrakar1: It's a good idea to check if it's a two-way link (odd that we never checked before), but if Cyclops Supreme was in constant contact with us as we are with him, shouldn't we all be able to hear him right now?
No. 621070 ID: 53f127

:cysumad: "Get in here, you fools! It's getting away!"

No. 621072 ID: 189a54

:tavvy: Hang on, sir! Otto, lead us to his quarters!
No. 621074 ID: 350a50

rolled 21 = 21

[stealth check to arrive without attracting intruder's attention]
No. 621075 ID: cef479

:miasmamini: Did he just say "IT"? Is there a rodent in there!?
No. 621079 ID: 41fd27

Let us get to murdering things damn it!
No. 621080 ID: 350a50

Rodent catching would be your area of expertise wouldn't it, cat? Get a move on.
No. 621085 ID: 41fd27

Alright maggots! It's game time!
Let us march in and kick this Micky Mouse wanabe right in the rumble spheres and go back to preparing for sweet victory! Move out!
No. 621087 ID: ea0ad9

:toko-close: Alright, cat, get in there. I'm not bothering with intruders, cardboard is good for hiding, not fighting.
No. 621088 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: Sounds like what ever "it" is, it is fleeing. It must be wounded or scared we have the advantage so let's go hunting!
No. 621092 ID: a19cd5

:RIOT: you got it, boss-man!
>Riot: Recreate the Shining
No. 621094 ID: a79844

*smashes glass bottle*

:HH: Lets do this.
No. 621098 ID: 741ec5

:ig-roc-icon: Alright, seems I'll deploy my mercs right away.
*bzzt* Get in there, you dogs of war! Them kibble bits ain't cheap!
No. 621105 ID: bbe022

Remeber to knock first! Who knows what is going on in the Leader's room!
No. 621107 ID: 52741d

:skrakar: As you command, my liege!

Ancient spirits of evil, grant us unholy speed in exchange for offering of my blood!
*craaaaawliiing in my skiiiin intensifies*
No. 621111 ID: cef479

:miasmamini: Nyah! Pounce upon the vermin with great gusto!
No. 621125 ID: 46df9e

Ah, not to put a damper on this train of kick ass, but does anyone know where Cyclops Supreme's personal quarters are or are you just going to run randomly through the base in a disorganized mob?
No. 621126 ID: b13816

Disorganised, like usual.
No. 621130 ID: 82b3b5

:skrakar: We're following Otto. Problem solved. Can we go already? I'm getting a bit lightheaded.
No. 621132 ID: ea0ad9

:toko-close: Drink some water. It helps when you've lost blood.
No. 621142 ID: 41fd27

Lets move already maggots!
Every moment not punching something is a moment something is not getting punched!
No. 621143 ID: 5869f6

Let's fuck 'em up! *unnecessarily cocks mauser several times*
No. 621157 ID: 2f2fc2

No. 621172 ID: 53f127
File 142170631672.png - (52.42KB , 600x600 , RotC38a.png )

No. 621173 ID: 53f127
File 142170632710.png - (175.61KB , 600x600 , RotC38b.png )

No. 621174 ID: 53f127
File 142170643027.png - (182.95KB , 600x600 , RotC38.png )

"It took you long enough, you fools! Hurry! It's getting away!"
No. 621175 ID: cef479

No. 621176 ID: 53f127

:cysumad: "The elf of course!"
No. 621177 ID: 1d3aa9

:skrakar1: A note on the bed, a slash on the pillow...Everyone, scan the room for the shine of bladed weapons!
No. 621178 ID: 53f127
File 142170756189.png - (53.85KB , 600x600 , RotC39.png )

:cysumad: "There, in the vent!"
No. 621180 ID: cef479

No. 621182 ID: 5869f6

I want a layout of the vents! If the intruder's trying to escape, we need to know the shortest route out! Cut off it's escape!
No. 621184 ID: 1d3aa9

:skrakar1: My lord, can you order a lockdown on the base's ventilation system along with the exits? It would most likely aid our diminutive allies' pursuit after the vermin.
No. 621185 ID: d3be40

Okay, the rest of us will scan the base for whatever the hell was in Cyclops Supreme's room! You two bring a video camera, we can cross-reference the tracks in the air duct passages to the general layout of the base and narrow down where that sucker went!

And seriously, boss? Basic air ducts? Can't you at least install some air purifiers that kill anything which passes without inputting a password?
No. 621187 ID: 53f127

:otto: "Excellent idea! You're in charge of the project. I expect a progress report on my desk first thing tomorrow."
No. 621196 ID: d45ea1

:curt: It left a note! First, we read it, obviously. Then, we pull prints off of it! I assume we can do that. Meanwhile, the base should go into full lockdown mode, nobody in or out! We need to find that elf!
Holy shit are we really chasing an elf. Is this for real. We're chasing one of Santa's elves.
No. 621197 ID: 189a54

:tavvy: Do we have anything in the vents we could track the thing with, cameras or anything? And what's that note say?
No. 621202 ID: 1d3aa9

:skrakar: Miasma, if you can hear me, be careful. Elves of any allegiance are fae in origin and very vicious when not in their master's vicinity. Be prepared that you'll have a fight with a cornered rat on your han...paws.
No. 621206 ID: 53f127
File 142171329996.png - (35.69KB , 250x250 , RotC40a.png )

>Examine Note
No. 621208 ID: 89256f

:kingmomo: I will catch that elf!
No. 621209 ID: 6e79d4


No. 621210 ID: 189a54

:tavvy: Oh my god.
No. 621211 ID: fff930

:ig-roc-icon: Scanning for non-fine particulates in the vent system... damn, it seems there's more than one intruder, or we have a rat infestation. Three signals detected, one in the bathroom vent, one above the trooper cantina, and another near dr. Madman's laboratory.
No. 621212 ID: 330ce5

:kingmomo: Someone should sweep for bugs and another group should help secure our little friend in the vents.
No. 621214 ID: 16700f

Hey, Cyclops, is this the first time Santa's apparently tried to kill you?
No. 621217 ID: 53f127
File 142171500554.png - (75.28KB , 600x600 , RotCend1.png )

End of Chapter I
Unfortunately, this is where we're gonna have to pause for now. But Cyclops Supreme and his nefarious henchmen will be back with more evil schemes!
No. 621218 ID: 41fd27

Oh my god. That fat fucking communist!
How dare he meddle in our grand plans for world domination in the name of America and Cyclops!
We got a midget to hunt down men. I suggest we let the freedom cat go into the vents while we split up to all of the vent exits. Once the tiny fucker pops out we clobber him!
No. 621225 ID: d3be40

This might be an Ace Defenders mind-screw. This guy might have disguised himself to look like a jolly elf. Remember, our plans have NOT been encrypted, and the Ace Defenders had a Christmas psycho (Sgt. Jimmy Noel).

We can't afford a trip to the north pole because of one spy. But if these attacks continue and we prepare the correct team/gear, we might be able to perform an arctic mission to shut this guy up.

As for the purifiers, I think we can make due with antigravity-contained microwave sand, which induces low-risk radiation in a small contained zone of mostly-sand, churning around to prevent dust and dirt. We'll also need small storage containers, which take air from the vents and separate different gasses into different tanks, which can be released in an emergency.

As for the death part, the sand can be superheated and accelerated in seconds, making a small sandstorm of death. To deactivate the vent temporarily, the user must bypass a coded security lock or hack the controls. Failed attempts to hack will release all the stored gasses at once, in the direction of the sand, while the antigravity is turned off.

Doctor Madman, you up for the challenge? Test a prototype, get it to work, and then come up with a protective coating/armor that allows the machine to do its job while under environmental stress.
[Return] [Entire Thread] [Last 50 posts] [Last 100 posts]

Delete post []