Nonono you fool! Canada is famous for its mandatory use of English AND French! You need to knock once in English, say hello, then a second time in French, and say Bonjour!

>>522892
Is there a fire axe around anywhere? You could tap into your latent lumberjack powers to shatter the door down.

Trout 2013/07/18(Thu)01:42 No. 525211 ID: 52c28e
File 137413694347.png - (5.90KB , 650x650 , sh239.png )

>While a true Frenchman would admit defeat here YOU are a TRUE CANADIAN!
>Is there a fire axe around anywhere? You could tap into your latent lumberjack powers to shatter the door down.

Trout 2013/07/18(Thu)01:42 No. 525212 ID: 52c28e
File 137413695780.png - (7.22KB , 650x650 , sh240.png )

WHAM

Trout 2013/07/18(Thu)01:42 No. 525213 ID: 52c28e
File 137413697410.png - (13.53KB , 650x650 , sh241.png )

CRASH

"OKAY LOOK I NEED GAS FOR MY THINGAMAJIG SORRY. Sorry. Terribly sorry."

Trout 2013/07/18(Thu)01:43 No. 525214 ID: 52c28e
File 137413699224.png - (9.15KB , 650x650 , sh242.png )

...He's staring at me.

"Uh... gas. Gas, the stuff you put in cars. Gasoline? Petrol?"

His face lights up. "Oh! Benzina! C'è una stazione di servizio lungo la strada. Uhhhhh, petrol... down... street."

"Oh! Well. Thanks. Sorry about the door..."

Trout 2013/07/18(Thu)01:43 No. 525215 ID: 52c28e
File 137413700455.png - (11.35KB , 650x650 , sh243.png )

Okay, if I understood him right, there's a gas station down the street. There's probably going to be people there that I might have to avoid, eh?

...Can I take off the disguise yet?

NO.

>>525216
NEVEEEEER!!

If someone starts asking about a crazy french guy wielding an axe just claim that you are Basque and not french.

Now go get that benzine!

Trout 2013/07/28(Sun)23:15 No. 528982 ID: 52c28e
File 137507850330.gif - (13.53KB , 650x700 , sh244.gif )

Okay okay fine fine I'll keep it on! But it comes off as soon as we leave.

I guess, uh...

Trout 2013/07/28(Sun)23:15 No. 528983 ID: 52c28e
File 137507852775.png - (9.93KB , 650x700 , sh245.png )

This way. I'm guessing, here.

Okay those are nazis. Who are ALSO getting gas. Thaaaaaaaat's going to complicate things a bit. I gotta find a jerry can or something to carry the gas back AND try to keep these guys from noticing me somehow.

Oh no, if you go up to them with this disguise they'll almost certainly try to bully you! There's only one solution; you have to axe murder them all as stealthily as possible.

Oooor you could just wait for them to finish.

Buuut, we might have to wait a bit. That looks like a tiger tank, and they're known for using a lot of fuel.

Trout 2013/07/29(Mon)02:17 No. 529014 ID: 52c28e
File 137508942235.png - (6.22KB , 650x700 , sh246.png )

>Oooor you could just wait for them to finish.
Yeah, but the faster I get the fuel, the less likey it is someone finds that whirlymagig that I built!

>>528983
Use lumberjack tech: AXE TOSS on the guy resting on the side of the tank out of view from the others. Afterwords, sneak over and retrieve axe and activate COMMANDO MODE on the remaining soldiers, preffereably AFTER you clear out anyone who might be inside the tank

>>529021
Yeah, you are Canadian Commando Wilson! This should be your specialty.

Remember all that axe murdering I mentioned?

Trout 2013/08/07(Wed)23:54 No. 532532 ID: 52c28e
File 137594487108.png - (7.58KB , 650x650 , sh247.png )

>axe murdering
>AXE TOSS

First off, that's racist, eh! Or nationalist. Not ALL Canadians are lumberjacks. We're not ALL good with axes. Come on! I mean, look!

HUP.

Trout 2013/08/07(Wed)23:54 No. 532533 ID: 52c28e
File 137594488354.png - (10.78KB , 650x650 , sh248.png )

CLUNK

Trout 2013/08/07(Wed)23:54 No. 532534 ID: 52c28e
File 137594489872.png - (5.65KB , 650x650 , sh249.png )

...That doesn't prove anything. See, look, the blunt part hit him, not the sharp bit.


Alright, I snuck over here next to the tank. This Nazi's out like a light, and his friends over there were talking too loud to hear the axe hitting him. Which I heard from all the way across the street. They're VERY loud.

This is pretty much the layout of the gas station, I think. I saw three others, there might be more.

You can drive a tank, right? They should have some fuel in it by now so slip in and rev it up and run them all over.

>>532536
Remember the death screams when you crushed enemies in Goldeneye 007? Ahhh, memories.

Climb inside the tiger and jam the axe against the controls so that it starts moving forward, then drop out of the bottom escape hatch and get your benzina while the nazis are chasing their tank down the street.

>>532534
Right, get aside the tank and guage wether or not you will be able to steal it, then go on a nazi killing rampage with it if you can.
Then when thats done, leech the gas into your weird flying bug looking thing

Drag the nazi into cover and take his uniform.

Trout 2013/08/16(Fri)15:34 No. 534940 ID: 52c28e
File 137669246528.png - (13.19KB , 650x650 , sh250.png )

>You can drive a tank, right? They should have some fuel in it by now so slip in and rev it up and run them all over.
>Climb inside the tiger and jam the axe against the controls so that it starts moving forward, then drop out of the bottom escape hatch and get your benzina while the nazis are chasing their tank down the street.

I can do that.

"Also sage ich, 'Hitler? Ich kenne sie kaum!'"
"Hahaha! Gut ein!"
"Ja, dann so I -"

thunk

Trout 2013/08/16(Fri)15:34 No. 534941 ID: 52c28e
File 137669249044.png - (12.74KB , 650x650 , sh251.png )

...

That was louder than I expected.

Shoot em with the tank.
Go mad with Canadian power!

"Hallo, ich bin der Inspektor. Zahlen keinen geist."

Well, they don't have guns pointed at you yet.

Hop in, lock the hatch, and then realize you've never driven a russian tank before and the pedals are all different.

Maybe run a few people over, crash into a storefront, and see if you can find a jerrycan or something in the tank to fuel your whatever.

Get in and start driving straight at the witnesses! You probably can't shoot them, though, I think those guns are piloted separately.

>>534954
This.

Trout 2013/08/29(Thu)12:10 No. 538355 ID: 52c28e
File 137780342603.png - (9.31KB , 650x650 , sh252.png )

>Shoot em with the tank.
>Go mad with Canadian power!
>Hop in, lock the hatch, and then realize you've never driven a russian tank before and the pedals are all different.
BANGBANGBANGBANG
It's a German tank! I know how to drive this, I think. I just gotta turn it and find the pedal or whatever this thing uses... Aha! Here goes nothing--

Trout 2013/08/29(Thu)12:10 No. 538356 ID: 52c28e
File 137780344118.png - (15.61KB , 650x650 , sh253.png )

CRASH

...I FORGOT HOW FAST THESE THINGS GO.

>>538356
Reverse, theres a guy roght behind you ripe for the squishin'

You are in a damn Pz4 yes its farst mate now go in to reverse and runover the guy behind you then fire the MG next to the maingun

Careful not to run over the fueling equipment.

Trout 2013/09/21(Sat)23:48 No. 541516 ID: 52c28e
File 137983249934.png - (9.46KB , 650x650 , sh254.png )

>Reverse, theres a guy roght behind you ripe for the squishin'
>go in to reverse

CRUNCH

...I think that was a guy.

Trout 2013/09/21(Sat)23:48 No. 541517 ID: 52c28e
File 137983253060.png - (6.89KB , 650x650 , sh255.png )

And there's just one guy, running off! Well that wasn't so bad I guess. I should probably go pay for some gas inside.

...I'll, uh, have to pay him later for wrecking half of the shop.

Trout 2013/09/21(Sat)23:49 No. 541518 ID: 52c28e
File 137983254292.png - (9.56KB , 650x650 , sh256.png )

...oh. Ohhhhh no.

Good news is: The fuel is free.
Bad news is: You are a man of conscience.

>>541518
Quick, shed your disguise! They'll be looking for a frenchman, they'll never know it was you.

I guess... get the fuel you need?

War is hell ect. ect.

Now get your benzina and disable the tank so the enemy can't use it by blocking the exhaust pipe with a potato.

>>541518
HE WAS AIDING AND ABETTING THE ENEMY, SOLDIER! TRAITORS GET NO REMORSE FROM US. NOW GET OUR FUEL AND LETS GET A MOVE ON, MAGGOT!

Trout 2013/10/08(Tue)14:48 No. 543407 ID: 52c28e
File 138126892352.png - (9.69KB , 650x650 , sh257.png )

>HE WAS AIDING AND ABETTING THE ENEMY, SOLDIER! TRAITORS GET NO REMORSE FROM US. NOW GET OUR FUEL AND LETS GET A MOVE ON, MAGGOT!

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A REPRESSED PART OF MY PSYCHE!

Trout 2013/10/08(Tue)14:48 No. 543408 ID: 52c28e
File 138126893699.png - (9.13KB , 650x650 , sh258.png )

>Quick, shed your disguise! They'll be looking for a frenchman, they'll never know it was you.

Gladly!

>Now get your benzina and disable the tank so the enemy can't use it by blocking the exhaust pipe with a potato.

Okay, potato, and... I'm just, uh, gonna leave the money on the floor here.

Trout 2013/10/08(Tue)14:49 No. 543409 ID: 52c28e
File 138126895799.png - (11.75KB , 650x650 , sh259.png )

Alright, back at the thing now. I jammed the potato in what I think is the exhaust pipe of the tank. I'm not familiar with Nazi stuff. The streets were pretty much empty on the way back which was nice. And no one seems to have found the, uh, flying thing.

Wait, is that a kid?

Trout 2013/10/08(Tue)14:49 No. 543411 ID: 52c28e
File 138126899554.png - (5.93KB , 650x650 , sh261.png )

What?

>>543411
Say "uh, that's mine."

Take the bottle of homemade maple syrup conveniently in your left pocket and squirt him in the eyes!

>>543411
Compliment him on his glorious mustache.

Make a joke about how short he is.

Compliment his glorious moustache and point out how Italian moustaches are better than German ones. Your goal is to make him talk long enough to refuel your vehicle.

Compliment his butt.

>>543488
>Compliment his butt.
>>543441
>Compliment him on his glorious mustache.

I support these, also:

>Complement him on his inspiring voice.

Compliment him on his country's fantastic beaches and women.

Trout 2014/04/20(Sun)19:10 No. 571763 ID: 8750b6
File 139804624486.png - (12.49KB , 650x650 , sh262.png )

>Butt.
What-- what?

>Take the bottle of homemade maple syrup conveniently in your left pocket and squirt him in the eyes!
Hey, I'm not THAT stereotypical, eh?

Besides, I left it in the passenger seat.

Trout 2014/04/20(Sun)19:11 No. 571764 ID: 8750b6
File 139804626663.png - (9.50KB , 650x650 , sh263.png )

>Moustache.
>Fantastic beaches and women
"Hey, uh, that's... that's a nice... moustache. Better than German ones!"
>"How well of you to notice!"
"And your country's great! It's awesome. I like the beaches, and the women, and all those other things Italy is famous for.
>"Yes, yes! I see the game you are trying to play, Allied spy! Flattery will get you nowhere!"
I didn't expect it to!

Trout 2014/04/20(Sun)19:11 No. 571766 ID: 8750b6
File 139804627908.png - (13.18KB , 650x650 , sh268.png )

>That's mine.
"Well, uh, that's my... thing. That's mine."
>"I KNEEEEEW IT! GIVE ME THE SECRETS OF YOUR ALLIED SUPERWEAPON OR I'LL MAKE YOUR LIFE ONE OF PUUUUUUURE PAIN

As threatened as I want to be, this guy's shorter than my baby nephew! It doesn't look like he's going to budge, though, and I'm pretty sure he was putting something on my whirlymagig!

>>571766
Punch him right in the eye and send him running, then see what the hell he put on your copter.

>>571766
Play mind games with him! accuse him of being a spy.

>>571788
Not just is he a spy, he's a REBEL SABOTEUR, harming the loyalist war effort by messing with the high-tech flying machine that is so important to our mission!

Grab his helmet and yell "Keep away!"

That's no superweapon, it's a really comfortable talking machine.

You're canadian, your people can't even do superweapons.

Alied superweapon? But that looks nothing like a Serogorg.

get ye flask

"Okay, okay, I'll show you how it works! Just don't hurt me!" Allow him to get into the whirlymagig. Once you get close, grab his helmet and stab him in the eye with it.

Say "Okay, stand back and I'll show you how it works." Then just fly off.

tiny or not, he's enough of a douche to warrant a shoving of your foot up his ass. I suggest you don't stop shoving until he starts to taste the leather.

Pick him up and do a little dance with him raised above your head.

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:35 No. 584081 ID: 18da89
File 140528372729.png - (14.64KB , 750x750 , sh269.png )

>Punch him right in the eye
>Grab his helmet and yell "Keep away!"
>grab his helmet and stab him in the eye with it.
>a shoving of your foot up his ass.

But he's... He's like a little fat kid! I mean, if you ignore the moustache, I guess, but still! I-I don't think I have it in me to do something like that! Damn-- dang my Canadian manners.

>Play mind games with him!
That, I can do! "How do I know YOU'RE not a spy, or even a saboteur, trying to steal Axis secrets away by posing as an officer?"
>"ARROGANT FFFFFOOL! I am GENERAL GRANDI BAFFI, face of the ENTIRE MILITARY MIGHT OF ITALY! I am even on this poster!"

He is on the poster.

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:35 No. 584082 ID: 18da89
File 140528374626.png - (9.53KB , 750x750 , sh270.png )

>see what the hell he put on your copter.
"Hey, uh, what is--"
>"THAT? That is a TRACKING DEVICE and also a BOMB. Yes, a BOMB. Don't look at it. It is a BOMB, I assure you, and it will go off if you look at it too long or do not do what I tell you to do! DO NOT THINK OTHERWISE."

"Uh... huh."

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584083 ID: 18da89
File 140528376047.png - (12.72KB , 750x750 , sh271.png )

>Say "Okay, stand back and I'll show you how it works." Then just fly off.

Oh, yeah, sometimes I forget it's a thing that can fly! I mean, it doesn't have wings or anything!

"Okay, okay, alright! I don't want to uh, be blown up today. By the bomb. I'll show you how it works and you can have it! Let me just put this gas in it. It runs on gas, see, like everything else!"
>"A-HA! Another Allied secret! Their vehicles run on gasoline!"

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584084 ID: 18da89
File 140528377388.png - (9.41KB , 750x750 , sh272.png )

"Okay, now, uh, just stand back a bit. For safety. Those spinny propeller bits go really fast."

He looks pleased as punch as I climb in. He's smiling wider than his moustache. It's actually really unnerving, all told!

>WILSONAI 1.0 ENABLED -- FUEL LEVEL AT 100%
>OBJECT DETECTED ON HULL -- SCANNING . . .
>OBJECT IS NOT A BOMB
>RE-ENGAGING PREVIOUS FLIGHTPATH
>SELF-IMPROVEMENT FIRMWARE DEVELOPMENT COMPLETE
>SUCCESSFULLY UPGRADED TO WILSONAI 1.1

I have no clue what a good part of that means.

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584085 ID: 18da89
File 140528379932.png - (13.04KB , 750x750 , sh273.png )

I don't get a chance to look at the look on the little guy's face before the whirlygig shoots up into the air and out over the streets of Italy. Hey, is that that one thing? The colluseum thing? Cool, I'm in Rome, I think!

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584086 ID: 18da89
File 140528381092.png - (16.02KB , 750x750 , sh274.png )

>"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
SWEET MAPLE SYRUP!

Check the changelog on WILSONAI 1.1, maybe it has some useful new tricks for this sort of situation.

>>584086
Fly down near a roof and just sortof spin the helicopter around. He'll fall off eventually.

Mrs. Wilson's voice echoes:
Put on your seatbelt, young man!

Just let him inside before he gets hurt, then you just have to be yourself.
Being confined in the same vehicle with a Canadian... This kid will fall into a coma from the boredom and then he will be your POW.

He's outside, you're inside. Just... go where you need to go.

Ask him where he want to be dropped off... and no you shouldn't drop him from the air, that's just rude.

Fly so high he passed out and falls off due to oxygen deprivation in the upper atmosphere.

Seems we have a guest, open the door and offer him some toast, this thingy does have a toaster right?

Trout 2014/08/02(Sat)15:00 No. 587658 ID: 18da89
File 140701682510.png - (24.39KB , 950x950 , sh275.png )

>Put on your seatbelt, young man!
Done!

>Fly down near a roof and just sortof spin the helicopter around. He'll fall off eventually.
>Fly so high he passed out and falls off due to oxygen deprivation in the upper atmosphere.

It's flying itself and I don't know how to stop it!

>He's outside, you're inside.
I-I guess you're right-- No wait no he just opened the door!


>Just let him inside before he gets hurt, then you just have to be yourself.
>open the door and offer him some toast, this thingy does have a toaster right?

"Well, uh, hi-- I'd offer you something but this thing doesn't have a--"
>"SAVE YOUR USELESS PLATITUDES! NOW I HAVE TO KILL YOU."

MAPLE SYRUP! NOW!!!

>>587659
>>571763
Chekhov's Syrup all over his eyes and mustache!

Syrup, now! And if that doesn't work then shout at politely ask the machine to eject the intruder.

Can't you just kick him out?

>>587658
Bloody hell, moustache kid! hands and legs in the ride AT ALL TIMES! Wrap him up in seatbelts, show him how Canadians do proper safety!

Trout 2014/08/20(Wed)17:16 No. 590340 ID: 18da89
File 140858020995.png - (25.01KB , 950x950 , sh276.png )

>MAPLE SYRUP! NOW!!!
>Chekhov's Syrup all over his eyes and mustache!
>Syrup, now!

SYRUP

Trout 2014/08/20(Wed)17:17 No. 590341 ID: 18da89
File 140858023358.png - (9.83KB , 950x950 , sh277.png )

"AARERGRG"

It sticks his hands to his face and he goes spiraling out of the thing!

Oh gosh, I hope he's okay.

Trout 2014/08/20(Wed)17:17 No. 590342 ID: 18da89
File 140858024833.png - (13.00KB , 950x950 , sh278.png )

Okay, all fueled up and moving! Good to go, I guess! The whirlymagig is... flying itself, again. It said something earlier about getting an upgrade? How did it upgrade itself?

It seems like it's going northeast. What's in that direction? Bunch of European countries? Russia? Huh.

I wonder why this thing's doing the things it does!

Me too!

The whirlymagig works in mysterious ways.

You may want to take a nap; who knows when you'll get to sleep again once you arrive.

Ask it!

You should probably get rid of that not-bomb somehow, Grandi did let slip that it was a tracking device after all.