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Noon Brush
7524b0
>>168318
Alex, from the sounds of things you haven't tried to get help from someone that knows how to deal with trauma. Something like this is near impossible to get over on your own, true. However, directly changing memory is something that should not be taken lightly.
I'm aware of something called "Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing" which can help patients recover from traumatic events.
* Phase I: In the first sessions, the patient's history and an overall treatment plan are discussed. During this process the therapist identifies and clarifies potential targets for EMDR. Target refers to a disturbing issue, event, feeling, or memory for use as an initial focus for EMDR. Maladaptive beliefs are also identified.
* Phase II: Before beginning EMDR for the first time, it is recommended that the client identify a safe place, an image or memory that elicits comfortable feelings and a positive sense of self. This safe place can be used later to bring closure to an incomplete session or to help a client tolerate a particularly upsetting session.
* Phase III: In developing a target for EMDR, prior to beginning the eye movement, a snapshot image is identified that represents the target and the disturbance associated with it. Using that image is a way to help the client focus on the target, a negative cognition (NC) is identified – a negative statement about the self that feels especially true when the client focuses on the target image. A positive cognition (PC) is also identified – a positive self-statement that is preferable to the negative cognition.
* Phase IV: The therapist asks the patient to focus simultaneously on the image, the negative cognition, and the disturbing emotion or body sensation. Then the therapist usually asks the client to follow a moving object with his or her eyes; the object moves alternately from side to side so that the client's eyes also move back and forth. After a set of eye movements, the client is asked to report briefly on what has come up; this may be a thought, a feeling, a physical sensation, an image, a memory, or a change in any one of the above. In the initial instructions to the client, the therapist asks him or her to focus on this thought, and begins a new set of eye movements. Under certain conditions, however, the therapist directs the client to focus on the original target memory or on some other image, thought, feeling, fantasy, physical sensation, or memory. From time to time the therapist may query the client about her or his current level of distress. The desensitization phase ends when the SUDS (Subjective Units of Disturbance Scale) has reached 0 or 1.[1]
* Phase V: The "Installation Phase": the therapist asks the client about the positive cognition, if it's still valid. After Phase IV, the view of the client on the event/ the initial snapshot image may have changed dramatically. Another PC may be needed. Then the client is asked to "hold together" the snapshot and the (new) PC. Also the therapist asks, "How valid does the PC feel, on a scale from 1 to 7?" New sets of eye movement are issued.
* Phase VI: The body scan: the therapist asks if anywhere in the client's body any pain, stress or discomfort is felt. If so, the client is asked to concentrate on the sore knee or whatever may arise and new sets are issued.
* Phase VII: Debriefing. The therapist gives appropriate info and support.
* Phase VIII: Re-evaluation: At the beginning of the next session, the client reviews the week, discussing any new sensations or experiences. The level of disturbance arising from the experiences targeted in the previous session is assessed. An objective of this phase is to ensure the processing of all relevant historical events.
...so yeah, wanna try that? It's going to take kindof a long time to work through though. Weeks, months... maybe years.
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