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File 124853344223.jpg - (167.19KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0001.jpg )
13140 No. 13140 ID: 429959

This is Nicolas. He's an affluent businessman. At the moment, Nicolas is spending a little time browsing his favorite website. A novelty site where pictures of cats are uploaded with humorous, badly spelled captions. Hilarious!
Expand all images
>>
No. 13141 ID: 429959
File 124853350852.jpg - (234.69KB , 825x675 , NickQuest_0002.jpg )
13141

Today, however, his browsing is interrupted. An internet video pops up on the screen! The figure cackles.

>"Greetings, everyone! My name is Rastin, your new lord and master! I've taken over this city, and soon will have the world! And there's nothing you can do to stop me! AHAHAHAHA!"
>"Please stay where you are, and a representative from my wonderful organization will be around soon to forcibly reeducate you!"
>"As you may have noticed, we have taken over your internets! Allow us to now replace your LOLCATS with ROFLDOGS! No need to thank us."
>>
No. 13143 ID: 429959
File 124853356914.jpg - (156.52KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0003.jpg )
13143

... you /hate/ ROFLDOGS.
>>
No. 13144 ID: 429959
File 12485336139.jpg - (156.64KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0004.jpg )
13144

Well, this just won't do. Something needs to be done. Besides, Nick's not going to look at hilarious photo captions of DOGS all day. God.

... but what should we do, exactly?
>>
No. 13148 ID: 93c708

Go to computer
Open tgchan
Masturbate
>>
No. 13150 ID: fb5d8e

Molest cat
>>
No. 13152 ID: 390793

>>13140
Get your tophat and cane and get to the bottom of this enormity!
>>
No. 13153 ID: 429959
File 12485361924.jpg - (66.15KB , 494x497 , NicQuest_0005.jpg )
13153

>Masturbate

... nah, not right now. There's got to be something more constructive to do around here.

>Cat Molestation

No, a cat is not fine too.
>>
No. 13154 ID: 429959
File 124853725334.jpg - (172.82KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0006.jpg )
13154

>Get your tophat and cane and get to the bottom of this enormity!

Now there's an idea! Unfortunately, Nicolas is lacking in the tophat department.

He does, however, have formal wear. He makes do with that and acquires his trusty CANE.

He doesn't even know why he keeps this thing around. He can walk just fine. Perhaps because it looks gentlemanly.

Nicolas adds the CANE to his inventory. The only other item he's carrying is his FANCY LAWYER PEN.
>>
No. 13155 ID: f42c4e

>>13153
Wield cat by tail and use as weapon. Then go outside and smack the first person you see with your cat.
>>
No. 13156 ID: fb5d8e

French kiss cat
>>
No. 13157 ID: 390793

>>13154
Now we shall get into our trusted HYBRID AUTO-MOBILE and visit our friend the MAYOR. Let's just hope he doesn't take offence at our lack of a TOPHAT.
>>
No. 13158 ID: 429959
File 124854027054.jpg - (181.22KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0007.jpg )
13158

>Wield cat by tail and use as weapon. Then go outside and smack the first person you see with your cat.

Hmm. It is true that cats are highly valued for their ANTI-COMMONER capabilities. You decide to bring SKIMBLESHANKS with you.

>French kiss cat

Ew, no.
>>
No. 13159 ID: 429959
File 124854037265.jpg - (140.46KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0008.jpg )
13159

>Now we shall get into our trusted HYBRID AUTO-MOBILE and visit our friend the MAYOR. Let's just hope he doesn't take offence at our lack of a TOPHAT.

Hmm. If Rastin's taken over, doesn't that make him the mayor? Regardless, it would be nice to know what happened to the former one. Nicolas heads to his garage.

Look at that Mercedes. Just look at it. What kind of piece of crap drawing of a Mercedes is that? You can barely even make out the damn star.

Anyway, we've got the car, we've got the cat. Where were we going again? Town hall?
>>
No. 13162 ID: 390793

>>13140
Of course! But if you find a store, that is specialized in selling hats, tophats to be even more specific, then you shall make a short stop to acquire one of mentioned hats. Make sure you got your wallet.
>>
No. 13163 ID: fb5d8e

Take your cat to rape city, if you know what I mean.
>>
No. 13358 ID: 5e64a9

>>13159
I concur with the need to buy a hat. What the hell kind of AFFLUENT BUSINESSMAN are you? You don't even have a monocle.
Also, go ahead and tell us what you're capable of. SHOW US YOUR STATS.
>>
No. 13784 ID: f98e0b

You're a successful young black businessman and as we already know from KaraQuest there are zombies outside. Before you go out it is your responsibility, nay, duty, to GRAB SOME PEELS.
>>
No. 13816 ID: 67c611
File 124857515871.jpg - (74.36KB , 1280x1024 , 1232743575335.jpg )
13816

>>
No. 13949 ID: a3b36a

In b4 cat-in-car scene. Everyone knows what happens when a cat is loose when you're driving, right?
>>
No. 13951 ID: 06b21e

>>13949
It snuggles up quietly on your lap? Because this has been my experience in the past.
>>
No. 13962 ID: b1d4ff

>>13159
Bring the tank of gas. You never know when you're going to have to douse everything in gasoline.
>>
No. 17974 ID: f4963f
File 124897243189.jpg - (165.04KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Sheet.jpg )
17974

(Hey guys! I just got on my plane back from Frankfurt to Chicago today, so updates should be able to continue shortly.)

>STATS

Nicolas is a BUSINESS LAWYER. He makes a career out of helping fat rich white guys sue other fat rich white guys by for RIDICULOUS SUMS OF CASH. He also has a knowledge of INTERNET SUBCULTURE that's way more comprehensive than is seriously healthy, and entertains himself with geekish things on a daily basis. Seriously, ask him which Star Trek movie was best.

These two aspects of himself he keeps as separate as possible.

Nicolas' PHYSIQUE is not anything special. His MIGHT compares favorably to a wet noodle, and his AGILE and TOUGH are not something to write home about.

He is, however, CLEVER, CONVINCING, and LOADED WITH CASH. His LOGIC and CHARM stats are quite favorable. He is, after all, a professional bullshitter.

His wealth level is currently WEALTHY.
>>
No. 17981 ID: 9ac8e2

>>17974
You should be able to afford a damn nice hat, then.
>>
No. 18003 ID: f4963f
File 124897545977.jpg - (322.14KB , 1650x1350 , NicQuest_0009.jpg )
18003

>Bring the tank of gas.

Okay.

>>13162
>>13358
>>17981

>Buy hat!

Yes! It is imperative that you have a proper hat. What were we thinking? You immediately sets your sights on the nearest hat store.

>You're a successful young black businessman and as we already know from KaraQuest there are zombies outside. Before you go out it is your responsibility, nay, duty, to GRAB SOME PEELS.

Zombies? What zombies? That's totally silly. You don't have any reason to believe that there are zombies in this part of-
>>
No. 18004 ID: f78140

purchase fully loaded BICORN and have name legally changed to "Nicolean". never take off the bicorn.
>>
No. 18006 ID: f4963f
File 12489755134.jpg - (163.83KB , 805x634 , NicQuest_0010.jpg )
18006

-oh. Fuck. THOSE zombies.

Wait. Wait wait wait. You're a BLACK GUY. You're in a ZOMBIE HORROR scenario. Your knowledge of B-GRADE ZOMBIE MOVIES is comprehensive enough to tell you that this is a BAD SCENARIO to be in.

You have a DERRINGER PISTOL in the glove compartment, but in your current position, you're pretty sure that zombie's going to make mincemeat out of you if you lunge for it. Plus, you don't know if these are the VOODOO UNDEAD type of zombies that rise from the grave, or the 28 DAYS type of zombies that infect you with one bite. The lack of fresh dirt on their corpses gives unfortunate implications towards the LATTER.

In your inventory, you have a FANCY LAWYER PEN, a CANE, an IRATE CAT and a TANK OF GAS.

... well, guys?
>>
No. 18007 ID: 9a71e2

>>18006
Peel out.
Two zombies are going to hang on through your DEFENSIVE DRIVING TRAINING?
>>
No. 18009 ID: f1637c

>>18006
Smack the one crawling through h window withthe cat. Swerve to get the one on top to t go.
>>
No. 18011 ID: 95484a

>>18009
Not the cat, the cane! Do you know how dangerous a zombie cat can be in a confined space?
>>
No. 18198 ID: f4963f
File 12489934588.jpg - (144.09KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_0011.jpg )
18198

>Peel out.

Screw this. Nic's not going to be zombie bait. He pounds his foot on the accelerator.

A sick twisting sound above him alerts Nicolas to the wretching of metal, and out of the corner of his eye, he can make out the hand of the window zombie. These fucking things must have grips of iron.

You're now speeding through the inner city with two zombies dangling from your car. What next?
>>
No. 18211 ID: 6faa8c

>>18198
If your skilled enough, grind the side one against a post or some such, for the other, find speed bumps.
>>
No. 18222 ID: 7eda8b

>>18198
Brake hard, then accelerate again.
>>
No. 18710 ID: 9ac8e2

>>18211 >>18222
Both of these. Initiate CRAZY PANICKED DRIVING SKILLS and swerve around to throw them off. Then brake hard and abruptly.
Then accelerate to hit them with the car.
Or, if they haven't fallen off by that point, start smacking into shit.
>>
No. 27710 ID: 4b96a7

>>18198

Swerve them off, or get yer gun and shoot boy!
>>
No. 27994 ID: f4963f
File 125004085473.jpg - (208.47KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Driveby.jpg )
27994

>Sidegrind
>Swerve
>CRAZY PANICKED DRIVING SKILLS

After what feels like an eternity (sorry about that, guys), Nicolas swerves the car wildly, trying to pry the zombies off his Mercedes. Though he's not an expert driver, he manages to swerve close enough to the curb to smack the side passenger into a lightpost. The roof zombie's still clinging, though! Stubborn bastard.
>>
No. 27996 ID: f4963f
File 125004092098.jpg - (231.78KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_ZombieWindshield.jpg )
27996

>Brake!

Nicolas decides to use inertia to his advantage. He slams on the brakes, bringing the car to a screeching halt. The zombie flies forward, twisting around and-

FFFFFFFFFF-
>>
No. 27999 ID: d5b2d6

SLAM THE GAS
>>
No. 28000 ID: bde1b8

>>27996
Open the door, then slam it shut again. THEN slam the gas.
>>
No. 28001 ID: d5b2d6

>>28000
that's not the door, it's the front window, HIT THE GAS
>>
No. 28004 ID: 806f2b

>>27996
Now would be a great time to pull out that derringer. Driving forward would probably propel the bastard into your face.
>>
No. 28005 ID: cd08c0

>>28004
Agreed. Slamming the gas would be bad. Shoot that fucker!
>>
No. 28008 ID: d5b2d6

>>28004
No, it would pull him under the car. His legs are unde the hood!
>>
No. 28009 ID: 95484a

Swerve to the right! Turn on the windshield wipers!
>>
No. 28011 ID: d5b2d6

>>28009
To the right is the wall of a building :|
>>
No. 28046 ID: f4963f
File 12500450208.jpg - (186.17KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_ZombieEnd.jpg )
28046

>Gas!

Nicolas isn't so sure this is a good idea. If the thing doesn't go flying off, it'll probably push it straight through the windshield. He's not feeling very GAMBIT-y today.

>Derringer!

Nicolas would love to get his pistol, but his seatbelt-

Oh wait. We didn't buckle our seatbelt.

Take THAT public service announcements!

Nicolas rolls off to his right just in time for the zombie to crawl in. He pulls his Derringer pistol out of the glove compartment and puts it in his STRIFE SUCCUBUS. I mean weapon slot.

The Derringer pistol is for men who have no need to compensate for anything. That is to say, it's the most incredibly small firearm you've ever seen. This makes it great for CONCEALED CARRYING.

It also means that the damn thing has a magazine of two bullets.

>SHOOT IT KILL IT WITH BULLETS

BANG! Nicolas squeezes off a round at point-blank range. Even though he's not left-handed, it's hard to miss at this range, and the blow punches through the hood zombie's head.

The zombie slumps in the driver's seat. Nicolas has one round left. It's also oozing some sort of black ichor over the driver's seat. Fuck.

What now?
>>
No. 28049 ID: d5b2d6

TIME TO GO ON FOOT

You need to find a hot chick, a war veteran, and a street punk.
>>
No. 28055 ID: 95484a

We're not even five minutes into this, and your car's already a mess! Get the dead zombie out as much as you can, and find a mechanic to fix the roof and windshield.

And put spikes on the hood.
>>
No. 28128 ID: cd08c0

>>28046
If it's no longer moving, kick that fucker out and resume driving. We can run some repairs later.
Hm. Stopping Rastin may be difficult with just our PANSYASS LAWYER powers. We may need to use our CHARM and WEALTHINESS to CONVINCE some people to join our motley band.
>>
No. 28159 ID: f4963f
File 125005171544.jpg - (138.94KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Crystal_01.jpg )
28159

>>28055
>>28128
>Remove zombie, fix car.

Nicolas would love to repair his car. This thing's a fucking Mercedes, it costs more than pocket change to get a new one. However, as mentioned before, Nicolas is uncertain about how infective these zombies are, or how they even came into existence. He's not going to touch that thing or the blood splattered all over his car until he's sure it won't lead to a lifetime of lolling around brainlessly. That'd be worse than the chans!

>GO ON FOOT

Nicolas guesses that this would be the only option left to him.

>Stopping Rastin may be difficult with just our PANSYASS LAWYER powers. We may need to use our CHARM and WEALTHINESS to CONVINCE some people to join our motley band.

Nicolas hasn't really put a lot of thought into how he's going to go about kicking Rastin out of power yet. As a former business lawyer, he actually knows a fair bit about Paraply itself, but this Rastin figure who controls it seems to have popped out of nowhere and twisted the world around his finger.

It's not like he can just get smashed and drive there in in a bigass truck. God that would be so stupid.

Well then, as Nicolas recalls, he was headed in the direction of the hat store. Perhaps along the way he can find out if those zombies are contageous and salvage his car. ... it's not going to do much good with the windows broken, but he locks it up anyway. He gets ready to go to the hat store and...

ooh, hold on. What's that?
>>
No. 28179 ID: cd08c0

>>28159
Ignore it! We have more important things to acquire.
TO THE HAT STORE.
>>
No. 28235 ID: 9e9b47

>>28159

Let's just go drop by. If it's something we can use to shoot more zombies with...
>>
No. 28253 ID: f4963f
File 125005870670.jpg - (132.35KB , 718x593 , NicQuest_Crystal_02.jpg )
28253

>Let's drop by.

We may have been a bit unclear about what caught Nicolas' attention. There seems to be a strange object right on the division line of the road.

It looks like a vaguely orangeish crystal with unidentifiable runes on it. It glows, as though internally lit.

Oh great. This is the kind of thing that the DM loves to screw you over with. If you touch it, he'll be all like 'You touched the weird glowing magic rock without any idea what it would do?!' and you look like an idiot. If you /don't/ pick it up, then he'll be like 'you had an obvious unattended magic artifact ready at your disposal and you didn't even pick it up?'

You had some dickish DMs. Then you made your own campaign and made them piss-scared of little girls in white dresses.

Ah, memories.

But seriously. What should we do with this thing?
>>
No. 28257 ID: 033b20

>>28253
Pick it up.
>>
No. 28274 ID: 6faa8c

>>28253
GRABBIT
>>
No. 28278 ID: 9e9b47

>>28253

Prod cautiously with finger.
>>
No. 28422 ID: 1f5d37

IT IS AN UNATTENDED OBJECT, YOU ARE A BLACK MAN. I THINK YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.
>>
No. 28654 ID: 9a71e2

>>28253
Pick it up with something so you don't have to touch it.
>>
No. 28782 ID: 806f2b

>>28422
Grabbin peels? NO WAIT! Grabbin p-p-p-magic object!
>>
No. 28800 ID: f4963f
File 125012773786.gif - (201.08KB , 718x593 , NicQuest_Crystal_03.gif )
28800

>Pick up the crystal
>Touch it!

Alright, sure. What's the worst thing that could-

Nicolas terminates that thought mid-sentence. He knows that's just asking for trouble.

Still, in the interest of healthy experimentation, the lawyer reaches his hand down and- woah. Woah. Woah.

>Animooted
>>
No. 28801 ID: f4963f
File 125012776724.jpg - (86.96KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Crystal_04.jpg )
28801

>Woah

Nicolas' vision blacks out for a moment. He feels a sharp pain in his mind, and is suddenly, painfully aware of the crystal - every edge and corner of it, as though it were a part of his own body. It feels like his brain is pressed in a vice.

Some sort of basic awareness in the back of his mind kicks in, and soon he is acutely aware of everything around him. Some part of him feels tied to the crystal, and through some bizarre intuition, he's aware that he can summon it to his palm by concentrating. He... feels like he should be able to do other things, too, but he's not quite sure what.
>>
No. 28802 ID: f4963f
File 125012778780.jpg - (138.68KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Crystal_05.jpg )
28802

Nicolas snaps out of it and recoils his hand. His head aches, but his vision's back, and his senses have returned to normal. He's pretty sure that the crystal did something to him, but he's not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

He senses it should be okay to pick up the crystal now. Apparently the damage has already been done.
>>
No. 28804 ID: 9b5a49

Ok, well then I guess we should head off on foot now.
Keep an eye out for other cars on the side of the road and check each one incase of an unlocked one.
>>
No. 28889 ID: bde1b8

Attempt to discern what the hell your new psychic power is.
>>
No. 28926 ID: f4963f
File 125014411218.jpg - (120.57KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Scrubber_01.jpg )
28926

>Ok, well then I guess we should head off on foot now.

Alright.

>Keep an eye out for other cars on the side of the road and check each one incase of an unlocked one.

Nicolas would make some crack about racial stereotypes, but he's only got one round of ammo to his name in the middle of a zombie-infested city being taken over by a supercorp. He'll keep his eye out and hope Yahoo News doesn't catch word of it.

>Attempt to discern what the hell your new psychic power is.

A novel idea, but easier said than done. Where does one even begin? Probably with the basics. Telepathy? He could try beaming thoughts into people's heads and see if they freak out. Telekinesis? Far seeing? If it's not something incredibly obvious for psychics, he's probably not going to have a clue. Maybe if he could find out more about the crystal...

Nicolas' thoughts are interrupted by the sound of approaching footsteps. A man in a Men in Black outfit approaches him, wielding a machine pistol in one hand and an ID in the other. Nicolas immediately recognizes him as an MIB Scrubber.

>"Excuse me, sir. Agent Logan of the MIB. I need you to come with me."
>>
No. 28930 ID: 6faa8c

>>28926
>those sunglasses

REFUSE. Run for an alleyway.
>>
No. 28931 ID: 7eda8b

Ask "Am I under arrest?"

You've got some rights if you're under arrest.
>>
No. 28932 ID: bde1b8

Refusing would probably get you shot, and you are not as tough as Kara. Give him a hundred dollars to pretend he did not see you.
>>
No. 28941 ID: cd08c0

>>28926 >>28932
Politely ask him why. Use his name to throw him off by being personal.
Maybe we can be CONVINCING enough for him to let us go. Or, failing that, bribe him.
>>
No. 28948 ID: e5d95c

Talk your way out of it! That'll work!
"That car was mine, alright? Yes, it belonged to me, the armed black man looking for valuables and magic crystals to loot. I was only driving like that because of the zombies!"
>>
No. 28995 ID: 5ba271

Summon strife succubus as a distraction.
>>
No. 29005 ID: d5b2d6

"Shouldn't you be off fighting aliens?"
>>
No. 29007 ID: 08b357

"Some part of him feels tied to the crystal, and through some bizarre intuition, he's aware that he can summon it to his palm by concentrating."

When you get out of your current situation and are in a safe spot experiment with trying to summon the crystal. Possibly even shape it into different forms, it'd be nice to have a backup weapon in emergencies if you can make it change.

If not either of those, psychic/magic powers are always nice to have as well.
>>
No. 29009 ID: f4963f
File 125018072660.jpg - (119.27KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Scrubber_02.jpg )
29009

>Ask "Am I under arrest?"
>Politely ask him why. Use his name to throw him off by being personal.

"Alright, Logan. I hear you. May I ask what I'm being arrested for?"

>You've got some rights if you're under arrest.

These are Paraply's Men in Black, not the conventional city police! They're probably working directly under Rastin's orders. Nic's not sure what sort of rights exist under Rastin's hypothetical world order, but they probably don't include a right to a fair trial.

>"May I ask what I'm being arrested for?"

Logan replies. "Everything psionic belongs to Paraply and Rastin, including those zombies. You're wanted for the destruction of government property. In addition, I thought I saw you fidgeting around with that crystal earlier. If you've built a psychic link to it, we will most definitely be needing to haul your ass in."
>>
No. 29010 ID: bde1b8

>>29009
>You're wanted for the destruction of government property
"The destruction of government... THEY WERE TRYING TO EAT ME."
>>
No. 29015 ID: f78140

if the crystal gave you psychic powers, see if you can go Tetsuo on his ass.
>>
No. 29023 ID: f075ad

swing CAT at his head.
>>
No. 29038 ID: f4963f
File 125019068781.jpg - (117.72KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Scrubber_03.jpg )
29038

>"The destruction of government... THEY WERE TRYING TO EAT ME."

"That's not really my problem, is it? They're the LIVING DEAD for chrissakes. You could outrun them at a brisk jog. We don't appreciate you and any other would-be heroes compromising our resources."

>"Shouldn't you be off fighting aliens?"

Nicolas bites his tongue. Better not make the MiB any more irate. It's a funny thought, though.

>if the crystal gave you psychic powers, see if you can go Tetsuo on his ass.

Nicolas squints his eyes at the agent and tries to throttle him with his mind. The agent stares at Nicolas deadpan. Well, whatever we can do, it looks like force-choking's not part of it.

"What... on earth are you doing?"

>swing CAT at his head.

The man's armed with a MACHINE PISTOL levelled straight at us. Nic's pretty sure Logan can pull the trigger faster than Nic can begin unwarranted animal abuse.

"There will be a five thosuand dollar fine for the zombies. In addition, because you've probably come in contact with that crystal, we're going to need to take you to Compound 43." He gestures with his firearm. "I strongly suggest you comply, citizen."
>>
No. 29041 ID: bde1b8

>>29038
Now if I am reading this, you are ridiculously affluent, correct?

Pay him the 5000$ fine, and offer an extra 10000$ if he'll forget he ever saw you.
>>
No. 29058 ID: 98dab8

>>29041
While bribery can go horribly awry, it seems like we don't really have a better option at this point.
>>
No. 29063 ID: 7eda8b

"Now hold on just a minute, let me just get my..."

Pull out the crystal and throw it at him. He considers it a big priority so he'll try to catch it, throwing off his aim. Run for it.
>>
No. 29077 ID: f075ad

"Look, they were climbing on my car. How was I supposed to know they were going to limp at me and not sprint at me like they hadn't eaten anything in 3 days? Haven't you seen the movie 28 days later?"
>>
No. 29095 ID: e5d95c

No force choke? Okay, no problem, try jedi mind tricking him. Or tell your cat to attack when you get close enough to hand over the money.
Just keep trying stuff.
>>
No. 29101 ID: 9e9b47

>>29038

Just go with the guy. He's got more firearms than you, so you might as well comply. There might be a chance to escape later.
>>
No. 29383 ID: cd08c0

Ask him why he's with the MIB. Probe this line of questioning. Maybe we can get all Hannibal Lector on his ass.
>>
No. 29443 ID: 2cbe3e

>>29038

Wait, this dude works for Rastin. See if you can get the fuck out of there. Agree to go with him long enough for the guy to turn his attention away.
>>
No. 29466 ID: f4963f
File 125027955234.jpg - (128.14KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Scrubber_04.jpg )
29466

>No force choke? Okay, no problem, try jedi mind tricking him.

Nicolas resolves to stop making himself look like an idiot in front of the guy with the gun.

>>29383
>Ask him why he's with the MIB. Probe this line of questioning. Maybe we can get all Hannibal Lector on his ass.

"Agent Logan, is it? What makes you work with the MIB?"

"We're the new world order. We keep you safe."

Are they /trying/ to be this Orwellian?

"Yes," says Nicolas, "but why side with Rastin in the first place? What do you see in a Paraply-lead world?"

"I'm beginning to question your acceptance of our peaceful transfer of power, citizen."

>>29041
>>29058
>Bribe him!

Nicolas holds up his hands and takes a step closer. "I see. I apologize, my good man. I fully intend to cooperate; I'll make good on the five thousand dollar fine. Though you know, there's a fair bit more in the account." He takes a cautious step towards the man. "I wouldn't mind parting with a little more of it if it means that we can put this whole incident behind us."

Agent Logan peers at Nicolas. "Do you realize how boned I would be if the MIB found out I let a shard-user walk free? No, psychic crystals are a top priority, and anyone who's formed a psychic link to one needs to be taken to Compound 43. I just saw you sitting down next to that crystal. As there is a chance you may have touched it, it's my duty to escort you away for psionic rehabilitation."

Nicolas is liking the sound of this Compound 43 less and less. They could have at least called it 'Psionic rehabilitation' or something. Compound 43 sounds like it jumped straight from a dystopian novel.

The agent appears to be growing increasingly irate with the lawyer's questioning. If Nicolas doesn't convince him or get away soon, the scrubber might start resorting to force of arms.

>Get the fuck out of there!

This... is looking increasingly appealing.
>>
No. 29467 ID: 6faa8c

Remind him it'd also be a good idea to take said crystals into custady, point it out, and run down that alley.
>>
No. 29468 ID: 2cbe3e

>>29466

Agree to go with him, albeit reluctantly. While going to his mode of transportation look for a way to book it. If this guy throws you in psychic rehabilitation I think you have as much chance of leaving as a cow does of leaving a slaughterhouse.
>>
No. 29469 ID: 9a71e2

>>29466
If psionic business won't work, then try something else.
Fixedly DO NOT stare at a point about a foot above his left shoulder.
Begin shaking visibly.
DO NOT tell him there's something behind him, but imply it with all of your body language.
If he asks, deny that there is anything behind him unconvincingly.
>>
No. 29470 ID: bde1b8

Toss the crystal at him, and shout "Fine! Its all yours!" Aim for just over his shoulder, so he'll have to turn to get it.

If he pursues it, run down that alley and gtfo. If he does not... well, I tried.
>>
No. 29479 ID: f78140

give up. let him take you where you are supposed to go in this instance. maybe that forcible re-education will include making you like ROFLdogs, and thereby solving your single grievance against Rastin.
>>
No. 29491 ID: 2e4eb7

Just fucking go with him. It couldn't be THAT bad. Besides, there might be a chance to escape later.
>>
No. 29516 ID: f4963f
File 125029104734.jpg - (70.15KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_WTF.jpg )
29516

>>29479
>maybe that forcible re-education will include making you like ROFLdogs, and thereby solving your single grievance against Rastin.

NOT EVEN WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER.
>>
No. 29517 ID: f4963f
File 125029106937.jpg - (125.47KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Scrubber_05.jpg )
29517

>>29469
>Divert his attention with a bluff.
If there's one thing years of business law have taught Nicolas how to do, it's bluff like there's no tomorrow.

Nicolas's gaze drifts over the agent's shoulder. He blinks once, and then his expression shifts. The agent looks confused. "Citizen, I'm going to ask you again..."

When Nicolas doesn't respond, the agent begins to look worried himself and quickly glances over his shoulder.
>>
No. 29519 ID: f4963f
File 125029111096.jpg - (164.08KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Scrubber_06.jpg )
29519

>>29023
>SKIMBLESHANKS. Apply directly to the forehead.

This is the opening he's been waiting for. Nicolas unleashes PURE FELINE WRATH on Agent Logan. Holy shit Skimbles is pissed.

Agent Logan drops his gun in shock.
>>
No. 29521 ID: cd08c0

>>29519
GRAB THE GUN.
>>
No. 29525 ID: bde1b8

>>29519
Tackle him! Then while he is down, pick up his gun.
>>
No. 29526 ID: f44349

>>29519
OBTAIN WEPON And/Or RUN LIKE HELL
>>
No. 29581 ID: 9e9b47

>>29519

Hit him in the chin with a Shoryuken!

Rising power!
>>
No. 29648 ID: f4963f
File 125030569121.jpg - (123.05KB , 674x643 , NicQuest_Scrubber_07.jpg )
29648

>GET YE GUN!

Nicolas picks up the machine pistol. Skimbleshanks continues to flip out, giving him ample time to do so. Thank you, Skimbles.

Something like this is bound to have a lot of recoil; Nicolas has no idea how to handle it. His experience with guns begins and ends with a mandatory 2 week gun safety course he took when he got his Derringer.

However, there's no reason Logan needs to know that.

Alright, we've got his weapon. What next?
>>
No. 29650 ID: 9a71e2

>>29648
Trip him, run with cat.
If he follows, point gun at him and keep running.
>>
No. 29651 ID: 276781

>>29648
Pick up GLASSES, wear or stow in pockets. Tell Agent Logan that he had better play nice with Skimbleshanks, or else he's going to get a gun sandwich.

Proceed with interrogation.
>>
No. 29659 ID: cd08c0

>>29648
Initiate SCARY BLACK MAN mode. Logan has no idea you're actually a wussy nerd.
Back up a bit so he can't just try to grab his gun back. Commence with interrogation.
At the end of interrogation, retrieve Skimbles who is a good kitty, make him drop all his items (including any communicators), and tell him to GTFO.
>>
No. 29674 ID: 95484a

Shoot him in the feet! Or legs! At this range, accuracy shouldn't be a problem. You just need to disable him so he can't steal the gun back.
>>
No. 29704 ID: f4963f
File 125031371275.jpg - (71.75KB , 550x450 , NicQuest_Interrogation_01.jpg )
29704

>>29651
>>29659
>Interrogate him.

Nicolas feels his stomach knot. He may have taken the guy's weapon, but there are still a few worries. What if he radios help? He may have a backup weapon, too. He also doesn't doubt that the agent has some form of body armour on under the suit. Still, Nicolas has turned around events, and damn if he isn't going to use it to get some answers. He puts on his best poker face and takes a step back from Agent Logan.

"Alright, Agent Logan," he says.
>>
No. 29705 ID: f4963f
File 125031374281.jpg - (97.65KB , 550x450 , NicQuest_Interrogation_02.jpg )
29705

>>29651
>Oh yeah, and steal his glasses.

"... it's my turn to ask the questions."
>>
No. 29706 ID: 9a71e2

>>29705
What do these crystals do?
Why is seven?
Do you have a family?
Why are did you take this job?
What are your qualifications?
Boxers or briefs?
Do I have a reason to leave you alive?
>>
No. 29708 ID: 9e9b47

>>29705

Ask him who the hell this guy Rastin is exactly. How can some guy who took over the internet be making zombies?
>>
No. 29750 ID: 6ab1c2

>>29706
"What do these crystals do? I may want to touch that one after all."

Then you'll only be wanted for insubordination, not being a high-priority psionic.
>>
No. 29908 ID: f4963f
File 125037876459.jpg - (91.03KB , 656x656 , NicQuest_Interrogation_03.jpg )
29908

Logan staggers back. Skimbleshanks lands on his feet and rushes under Nic's car. The agent's looking a lot more on edge now that he's on the receiving end of the pistol.

>>29708
>Who the hell is this Rastin guy?

"Rastin is the new leader of the free world. Or will be, soon. You're starting off on the wrong foot, citizen."

After a moment, Logan sees that Nicolas isn't happy with this answer.

"Rastin is... the new leader of Paraply, Incorporated. The company I work for. He became the CEO about two weeks ago, and we're just now executing his peaceful transfer of power."

"You mean the global takeover bit," says Nicolas.

"Yeah," says Logan weakly. "Basically."

>How can some guy who took over the internet be making zombies?

Logan tells Nicolas that it's because of some sort of massive MAGIC CRYSTAL Rastin has. Or maybe 'psionic crystal'. He sort of uses the terms interchangeably.

>Making Zombies

"So Paraply is producing zombies."

"Y-yes. They were... the result of attempts at revival magic."

"Are they infectious?"

"It's spread by a magically reinforced virus. The effect only takes hold if you die within 15 minutes of infection, though; the virus can only affect a recently dead body."

"I never heard of a virus that works like that."

"I don't think either of us have great experience with magic viruses."

So as long as Nicolas doesn't kick the bucket after touching the blood, he should be okay. Good to know.

>What do these crystals do?

"Like the one on the street? Heh. That's a psychic shard. They started appearing about two weeks ago. When someone touches them, it links to them, and they tend to manifest... strange psychic powers. The powers are much more low-key than a real psion's, but real psions tend to be rare anyway."

>>29750
>Insinuate that you didn't touch it to throw them off the trail.

"What would have happened if I had touched it, then? Would I start floating in the air and zapping lightning bolts from my ass?"

Logan eyes Nicolas suspiciously. "Nnno. Usually it takes a few days for a shard-holder to find out what they can do. And what do you mean if you /had/ touched it? You were kneeling right down next to it."

"I don't make a habit of touching strange glowing rocks with illegible runes on them," says Nicolas. "Actually, before you pulled the gun on me, I was about to go on my merry way to the hat store. Have you noticed that I don't have a hat? I'm desperately needing a hat, you jerk. And here you were about to cart me off to some compound in the middle of god-knows-where for staring at a rock. Fuck you."

"It's just for safety concerns, sir. S-since you were seen with the shard, I..." his gaze glances down to the gun. "... am sure we can reach a mutual understanding here. H-how about I just... leave that with you, and... take the shard off to the compound?"
>>
No. 29912 ID: 9a71e2

>>29908
Let him take it, then summon it to yourself when you get out of sight.
Unless he pokes it with something magic-looking or a lead box or something.
>>
No. 29921 ID: 98dab8

>>29912
Do this, but perhaps wait a bit longer than just until you're out of sight. In a more long-term setup, our mission is clear.

COLLECT ALL THE SHARDS!
>>
No. 29934 ID: 3d0e22

>>29908
Tell him you'll even pay the fine via mailed check.
>>
No. 29952 ID: 98dab8

>>29934
No point in overdoing it...
>>
No. 30012 ID: 276781

>>29908
Use ADEPT OBSERVATIONAL SKILLS to determine if Logan really wants to be working for Rastin.
>>
No. 30070 ID: f4963f
File 125039455287.jpg - (171.34KB , 888x672 , NicQuest_Interrogation_04.jpg )
30070

>>29912
>>29921
>Let him take the crystal, but keep an eye on him.

"You do that," says Nicolas in a level tone, gesturing with the gun. "No sudden movements. I wouldn't want my finger to slip."

>>30012
>SENSE MOTIVE CHECK

Hard to say. This guy's a scrubber, though, which puts him above the rank-and-file sweepers and desk job guys. He must have at least some attachment to his job to get this far. Apparently he puts his life above his country, though. Good man.

Nicolas keeps a close eye on Logan as he heads to the trunk of his van nearby. He opens it very slowly and puts on a pair of thick rubber gloves. He pulls out a small but official-looking plastic box and begins to move towards Nic's car.
>>
No. 30149 ID: f4963f
File 125040172965.jpg - (152.36KB , 825x675 , NicQuest_Interrogation_05.jpg )
30149

>Wait and see

Logan puts the crystal into the case and, warily eying the lawyer, makes his way towards the van.

"You know that threatening an officer is a criminal offense, citizen."

"Big surprise," replies Nicolas. "Just get out of my sight."

He gets into his black car and begins to pull out.

The MACHINE PISTOL has been added to Nic's inventory and equipped to the STRIFE SPECIBUS. The Derringer is place into Nic's inventory.

Nicolas keeps his eye on the car until it pulls out of sight.

Nicolas ponders his next action.
>>
No. 30150 ID: 9a71e2

>>30149
Summon the shard to your hand.
>>
No. 30151 ID: 6faa8c

>>30149
Get your hat, wait one hour, summon crystal, and DRIVE AWAY
>>
No. 30155 ID: f98e0b
File 125040206399.gif - (6.79KB , 400x400 , ahahaha.gif )
30155

Let's go somewhere we can learn more about this weird magic shit, like, oh, say, the headquarters of IGNOMETICS, where we will totally not have a run-in with another quest at all.
>>
No. 30161 ID: f44349

>>30150
>>30151
We could just move to someplace that is not here and summon it.
I mean they're gonna suspect you touched it either way so all we need to do is go to someplace this guy can't find us again and summon it.
Plus it'd be better to get it sooner rather than later in case they have some kind of anti-summoning case or somesuch nonsense.

>>30155
Also learning about WIERD MAGIC SHIZZ would be an excellent idea right about now.
>>
No. 30167 ID: 98dab8

>>30151
Wrong order, the driving away should take place immediately following the hat.
>>
No. 30215 ID: cd08c0

>>30149
First of all, make sure we have Skimbles who is a good kitty.
After that, we need to buy our fucking hat.
After that, maybe we should stock up on ammo and shit. Is there a gun store around here?

>>30155
After that, let's go somewhere where we can learn about WEIRD MAGIC SHIZ.
>>
No. 30221 ID: 9e9b47

>>30155

FUCK YES summon that shard and head on over there to get some answers.
>>
No. 30230 ID: f4963f
File 125040973159.jpg - (170.37KB , 600x543 , NQ_Chapter1_End_01.jpg )
30230

Nicolas clears the zombie out of his car. The windshield's smashed in and there's some blood on the seat, but the vehicle is otherwise serviceable.

>Summon crystal
Nicolas can still feel the connection, even though it's quite far away. He doesn't think there's any discernable range to this teleportation effect.

>Wait an hour
Discretion is the better part of valor. Nicolas wants to be somewhere else when Logan finds out he got bullshitted.

>IGNOMETICS
This is actually a very good idea. Nicolas is familiar with Ignometics; he even represented them in a case about a year back. If anyone knows about weird magical shit, it's them.

>Get your hat
Fuck yes.
>>
No. 30231 ID: f4963f
File 125040977173.jpg - (132.62KB , 900x815 , NQ_ChapterOne_End_02.jpg )
30231

Next stop: Ignometics
>>
No. 30232 ID: f4963f
File 125040979834.jpg - (97.55KB , 718x593 , NQ_Chapter_One_End_03.jpg )
30232

~ End of Chapter One ~
>>
No. 30233 ID: 6faa8c

>>30231
You are one dapper motherfucker.
>>
No. 30393 ID: 9a71e2

>>30230
Wait, how long has Ignometrics been around?
What does that say about the presence of magic?
>>
No. 30492 ID: 1f5d37

What happened to your glasses? From the beginning?
>>
No. 31391 ID: f4963f
File 125064281580.jpg - (61.70KB , 900x815 , Ch2_Splash.jpg )
31391

-- Chapter Two --
>>
No. 31392 ID: f4963f
File 125064302513.jpg - (205.43KB , 900x815 , Ch2_Ignometics_01.jpg )
31392

With his hat obtained, Nicolas sets his sights on his next target, Ignometics Infinite Technologies Inc. As mentioned before, he did a case for them about a year back, so he's familiar with the company.

He also takes the opportunity to clean the blood out of his car. It doesn't suit the Mercedes well, he feels.

>Wait, how long has Ignometrics been around?
>What does that say about the presence of magic?

Ignometics has been around about two years, ever since the discovery of magic. Though 'discovery' is the wrong word. It just began happening one day, and everyone freaked out.

There are two major corporations that deal in psionics now; Ignometics and Paraply.

The legal battles between the two have been epic; ultimately, they came to an uneasy standstill. They sort of tolerate one another's existence now. At least, that was the case before Rastin announced he was going to take over the world; wonder if that's changed.

>Glasses?

Nicolas left his glasses on the table back at home, near the beginning of his little misadventure. His eyesight's not that bad; the impact of not having them is minimal. Still, if he has to swing by his house again, he might pick them up.
>>
No. 31393 ID: f4963f
File 125064307618.jpg - (140.03KB , 900x815 , Ch2_Ignometics_02.jpg )
31393

Nicolas arrives in the Ignometics parking lot.

Doesn't look very busy today. On the other hand, it doesn't look very shot up either, so he'll take that as a good sign.
>>
No. 31394 ID: 6faa8c

>>31393
Go in, summon shard, tell them what happened and ask for help.
>>
No. 31395 ID: f78140

>>31394
watch out for the angry chick! she'll wreck your shit.
>>
No. 31412 ID: 7d87d9

Look for a PsiAmp. You never know when it might be useful.
>>
No. 31423 ID: fa0991

>>31393
Tell them you touched a psi shard and you feel weird. Would they please examine you?
>>
No. 31431 ID: f4963f
File 125064918272.jpg - (160.00KB , 900x815 , Ch2_Ignometics_03.jpg )
31431

>>31394
>Summon Shard and enter.

It's been about 50 minutes now; Logan should have no idea where Nic is. Nicolas focuses on the palm of his hand, and watches the crystal simply materialize into his open hand.

It's definitely the one from before; it even has the same markings.

Nicolas enters the building.
>>
No. 31432 ID: f4963f
File 125064920266.jpg - (155.28KB , 892x701 , Ch2_Ignometics_04.jpg )
31432

The lobby of Ignometics is large, and dominated with bright, clean colours, almost like the interior of an Apple Store. Only not as fruity. Well. /Almost/ not as fruity.

There's a few assorted people in the lobby, showing that the building is indeed not deserted; it even seems to be open. Nicolas recognizes Jay immediately; he's prettymuch the guy in charge around here. Jay also seems to recognize Nicolas.

"Oh, hey. I think I recognize you. Weren't you the stand-in lawyer in the Snowe case?"

Nicolas nods in affirmation. "And you're Jay, I believe?"

"That I am. What can I do for you, mister Zere?"

>>31394
>>31423
>Tell him what happened, get them to check up on Nic.

"Jay, have you ever seen one of these?" Nicolas tilts his hand a little to show Jay the psychic shard.

A few eyes turn in Nicolas direction. The receptionist looks up and then quickly averts her gaze down into her coffee. Jay hesitates, then nods. "Yes," he says. "We've seen it a few times now. That's a psychic shard. Paraply's been... rather aggressively collecting them."

"Tell me about it," says Nicolas. "I was nearly apprehended by a Scrubber." He pockets the shard. "I think it did something to me. Do you have any sort of psychic scanner that could... I don't know. Diagnose me?"

"I think... we should head upstairs and talk about this in private, mister Zere," says Jay. "We have some scanning equipment up there."
>>
No. 31440 ID: cd08c0

>>31432
Marvel at the difference in art quality between KaraQuest and NicQuest. Compliment Jay on how much better he looks, as compared to how he'll look when Kara shows up.
Do this with a completely straight face, ignoring the total destruction of the fourth wall.

Also, follow Jay. While moonwalking. Hum the music to Thriller as you go.
>>
No. 31444 ID: 5fe4a8

>>31440

This is clearly the only possible course of action.
>>
No. 31460 ID: f4963f
File 125065689551.jpg - (160.47KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_05.jpg )
31460

>>31440
"God damn, if you were drawn in Paint instead of Photoshop, reality would update a hella lot faster."

"What?"

For some reason, Nicolas gets Thriller stuck in his head. In the middle of a zombie apocalypse! Or, well, Nic guesses some businesses are still open, so it's not really an apocalypse. A zombie infestation?

Nicolas follows Jay upstairs, into one of their science labs.

Jay leads Nicolas to a large machine and tells Nicolas to put the crystal in. Nicolas does so, and a tube surrounds it.

Jay goes on to explain how the crystals work. When touched, they psychically bind to someone. They grant someone limited psychic abilities, though usually with less endurance than a real psion. There are only two ways to break the link.

"The first is death," says Jay.

"That doesn't sound particularly pleasant."

"The second is a technique the MIB are working on. Half the test subjects die. The other half basically go vegetative."

"I think I read that in a book somewhere."

"Yeah, but the film kinda sucked."

The machine dings and opens. Nicolas summons his crystal back, and Jay walks over to a massive computer terminal.

"Alright. Well, I'm seeing some mild psychokinetic attributes, and some mild illusory attributes. Um... you won't know how to use the crystal perfectly at first, but it looks like you should be able to lift light objects with your mind and..." he scrolls down. "Create minor illusions. Both will probably take a good deal of concentration."

"But I tried to force-choke someone already," says Nicolas.

"Well, yeah, but first of all, we're talking lifting and manipulating light objects with our minds, not strangling things. Secondly, you actually need the crystal in your possession to do it."

"Oh."

Jay continues to talk. Good thing Nicolas has a long attention span! An adventurer with a short one might miss something. WORDS WORDS WORDS.

Jay tells Nicolas that the crystals are, as far as he's aware, completely indestructable; some people have tried destroying theirs to evade MIB interest. One guy put his in an industrial vice. Some chick dropped hers into crazy powerful laboratory acid. And there was one guy who tried to cut it with a high-powered laser. Apparently none of it worked.

"There's actually a lot of people out there who are really pissed off about having crystals," Jay says. "Well... not a /lot/, there's only so many crystals. But you get it."

Nicolas pockets his crystal. So... he can make rocks hover with his mind and create images of dancing kittens, and for that the MIB want to lock him up in a state compound? ... he's pondering whether or not he actually likes this deal.

"Oh, and although we've seen a few crystals already, each one's utterly unique. Sort of a special snowflake thing. We're very interested in studying them, and offer financial incentives for information about them. Here, let me transfer some money to your account."

Nicolas' Wealth level goes from WEALTHY to VERY WEALTHY.

"Is there anything else you'd like to do, Mr Zere?"
>>
No. 31461 ID: 5fe4a8

Bulletproof business suit.
>>
No. 31464 ID: 6faa8c

>>31460
>Illusions

Get some photographs of movie extras.
When MIB show up, Illusion yourself to look like one of them.
>>
No. 31474 ID: fa0991

>>31460
Ask if they have anything magical for sale.
>>
No. 31475 ID: 7eda8b

"Well... I have an indestructible thing with sharp corners I can throw at people and have it return to my hand. That's something."

After several seconds of awkward silence, say "Say, can you guys James Bond up my car? Or at least fit it with some spiky things so it chops up zombies when they try to grab on?"
>>
No. 31478 ID: e5d95c

Say, do you know what's become of the mayor? You know, the old one?
>>
No. 31479 ID: 8fed85

Attempt to lift up light objects with said psychic powers.
>>
No. 31480 ID: bde1b8

...I just had a horrible idea.

We should duct tape the crystal to our submachine gun. Then we could keep the gun in our car, and summon it to us when we need it.

...First we would have to test if it works that way, but still.
>>
No. 31514 ID: 2af4d3

>>31460
No pyrokinesis? Damn. Ask him if he can put a secret compartment in your hat, like a magician. It'll be cheap and useful for hiding stuff.

Maybe improve Skimbleshanks' commoner deterring ability. Or allow him to speaks so he can be a better companion. Or let him speak like a lolcat, since you like them.
>>
No. 31612 ID: f4963f
File 125071772195.jpg - (122.67KB , 782x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_06.jpg )
31612

>>31479
>Attempt to lift up light objects with said psychic powers.

Nicolas' first action on finding out he has the force is an attempt to use it. Deciding that a loaded derringer might be a bad first item to test his telekinesis on, he uses his FANCY LAWYER PEN instead.

Agh! It feels like Nic's brain is on fire! But... but... it's hovering.

Hey. That's pretty cool.

>>31478
>Say, do you know what's become of the mayor? You know, the old one?

"Not really," says Jay. "He's been missing in action since Rastin appeared. Rastin's taken over the media airwaves, and we can only receive limited outside communication."
>>
No. 31613 ID: f4963f
File 125071774576.jpg - (120.93KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_07.jpg )
31613

>>31474
>Ask if they have anything magical for sale.

Jay has a few things available for field testing. He has a few rolls of DUCT TAPE OF REPAIR, which apparently works as a magical bandage for non-living things, and a pair of PSIONIC DETECTION GLASSES that have a persistent magic-detecting function. They also automatically adjust if you're near- or far-sighted to give you 20/20 vision.

They also have items for sale, including a WAND OF PRESTI, THAUMIC DISRUPTORS and a perpetual motion beak dipper bird thing. They also sell three-packs of HEALING POTIONS. They can also upgrade armour and weaponry. They're all RATHER EXPENSIVE and each would probably knock Nicolas down a wealth level.

"Wand of Presti... as in, Prestidigitation?"

"Yep! Like the D&D spell."

"So... you unravel the secrets of controlling space-time, and you use it to make a presti wand?"

"Well, yeah! It's like diet Wish! Come on."

>>31461
>Bulletproof business suit.

"Couldn't you just buy a kevlar vest? I mean, wouldn't it be a bit more-"

"Bulletproof. Business. Suit."

"... you're the boss!"

Magical enchantments cost a fuckton of money. Nicolas' wealth level goes from VERY WEALTHY to WEALTHY.

>>31514
>Feline enhancement?

That's not within their capabilities at the moment, apparently.

>>31475
>Car enhancement?

Possibly, but they'd have to take it into a special shop for a few days. It would also cost a fuckton of money per enhancement.

Alright, what do we do?
>>
No. 31614 ID: 6faa8c

>>31613
dem prototype glasses might be nice.
>>
No. 31623 ID: fa0991

>>31613
Well, take the free stuff of course, and one pack of healing. Is the thaumic disrupter some sort of magic nullifier? Ask if they can enhance the submachine gun with auto-aim.
>>
No. 31635 ID: 98dab8

>>31613
Volunteer to test the tape and glasses, and inquire about the Thaumic disruptor. Would it fuck with our crystal on any super-transient level? ie, are there any long term effects it would have on us?
>>
No. 31642 ID: 7eda8b

Better not knock any more wealth levels down. Maybe we can just go to a mechanic and get a brushcutter welded onto the car rather than something super-fancy here.

If we're using a White Wolf-style wealth system, we just need to get the level high enough that we can make purchases without lowering it.
>>
No. 31649 ID: 5fe4a8

>>31642
GODDAMN ABSTRACT WEALTH SYSTEM

I mean, uh...

Yes, maybe there are more mundane ways to better our car.
>>
No. 31692 ID: f4963f
File 125073680133.jpg - (165.05KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_08.jpg )
31692

>>31614
>>31623
>>31635
>Free stuff is good!

Nicolas will certainly take the free stuff. Nicolas equips the glasses, and several sections of the room begin to light up subtly. It looks like the big machine has some psionic components, as does Jay's watch. Neat!

We also get $1000 cash. Nicolas sticks it in his pocket.

>>31623
>One pack of healing
Done. Nicolas' Wealth level is now down to AFFLUENT.

>>31623
>>31635
>Thaumic Disruptor?
A thaumic disruptor has five charges. It dispels active psionic effects in a moderate area, and suppresses enchantments like enhanced weaponry or armour for a couple of minutes. It does not rob a psion of their ability to use further spells, nor should it affect psychic shards.

What now?
>>
No. 31712 ID: bde1b8

>>31692
Hmm... lets get ourselves a thaumic disruptor.
>>
No. 31733 ID: 26e176

>>31692
get disruptor, then head off to rescue the mayor. i think that's what we're doing, right?
>>
No. 31751 ID: 7eda8b

But.... Our riches! We need those to be rich!
>>
No. 31764 ID: 98dab8

The money's useless if we're dead. Our suit is bulletproofed, so we should be fairly safe from mundane assault, but magic could fuck our shit up. Lets spring for the disruptors. I don't want to go buying them all the time though, so let's try not to use them if we don't have too.
>>
No. 31867 ID: f4963f
File 125075228540.jpg - (187.54KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_09.jpg )
31867

>>31712
>>31733
>>31764
>Get the disruptor.

Alright. Nicolas buys the disruptor. His wealth level drops to WELL-OFF.

Nicolas feels content with his inventory for now.

>== INVENTORY ==
>Magic Glasses, Reinforced Business Suit, Cure Potion x3, Disruptor (charges x5), Psychic Crystal, Derringer Pistol (ammo x1), Machine Pistol (ammo x30), Fuel Can, Cane, Fancy Lawyer Pen

Jay thanks Nicolas for his patronage, and tells him to return if he finds anything particularly paranormal to poke at.

Nicolas makes his way outside when -- wait, what's this? Some freakishly tall chick has crudely pushed him aside! What's weirder is her company. She seems to be accompanied by a midget reptile whose body is 50% nose, a schoolgirl, a crazy man with disheveled hair, and a morbidly obese man shouting about beef while carrying a zombie. He's literally carting a zombie around.
>>
No. 31868 ID: f4963f
File 125075230523.jpg - (172.79KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_10.jpg )
31868

The creepy man stops and sniffs at Nicolas suspiciously. Nicolas feels unnerved.
>>
No. 31869 ID: f4963f
File 125075232957.jpg - (144.17KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Ignometics_11.jpg )
31869

... okay, that was weird. Where to now?
>>
No. 31871 ID: 6faa8c

>>31869
GTFO, or break the time-stream by joining their merry band.
>>
No. 31876 ID: 9e9b47

Off to the mayor's office perhaps?

Alternately, we could train our PSIONIC POWERS in a place where we won't get disturbed for a while, and then go and see if we can go to Rastin directly. Maybe not a group assault, but a single person infiltrating the place could be useful. We can disguise ourselves after all, maybe with a bit of training we can look like a Scrubber and slip inside.
>>
No. 31878 ID: bde1b8

>>31869
To the MAYOR to issue a FORMAL COMPLAINT.
>>
No. 32014 ID: f78140

>>31869
travel around the city, searching for
A) more psion crystals
B) allies
C) lolcats t-shirts for the upcoming shortage.
>>
No. 32022 ID: 7eda8b

We should ply the city for doodads to increase our WEALTH LEVEL.
>>
No. 32244 ID: f4963f
File 125082754776.jpg - (177.47KB , 900x613 , Ch2_Mayor_01.jpg )
32244

>>31871
>Join the party!
W... with KARA SIGURD?! Have you forgotten the Hotel Incident?!

>>32014
>>32022
>Cruise the city looking for psychic loot and allies!
If Nicolas is looking for ALLIES, he'll probably need a specific place to start. As for crystals... he has no clue where to begin. His glasses will tell him when something psychic is in the area, but he'd never even heard of the things until this morning.

>lolcats t-shirt
Nicolas already has three. ... shhhh.

>>31876
>>31878
>Mayor's Office!
Very well then.

Nicolas drives over to the mayor's office, which for some reason looks much more ornate than it needs to.

There are two MIBs here. They look like bottom-rung Sweepers to Nicolas. He can see a few more patrolling the yard. The gates to the estate are closed.
>>
No. 32248 ID: 7eda8b

Say "I HAVE BUSINESS BEYOND THIS GATE. STAND ASIDE."

Gesticulate dismissively.
>>
No. 32265 ID: 9e9b47

>>32244

See if you can use powers to make your driver's licence look like some sort of official badge that a Lieutenant of Rastin would use. Put on yellow glasses and stroll up, demanding to be let in. Tell them all you're one of Rastin's new personal lackies, and you don't wanna be kept waiting.

If they ask your business, scoff incredulously. Flash the crystal and tell them they're lucky you don't throw them both through the gate right now.
>>
No. 32308 ID: 6faa8c

>>32307
Man, later on, when we're alone, we seriously need to exercise the grey matter more.
>>
No. 32309 ID: f4963f
File 125083534625.jpg - (105.05KB , 600x463 , Ch2_Mayor_02.jpg )
32309

>>32248
>>32265
Nicolas equips the ridiculous glasses. He's only seen an MIB badge once in his life, but his background makes him intimately familiar with government documents and IDs. Using his recollection of the badge's layout and his own lawyery knowledge, he could probably create a forgery that will pass casual observation.

"I have business beyond this gate," says Nicolas, gesticulating dismissively. "Stand aside."

"Mmyeahkay," says the larger Sweeper chewing bubblegum.

"You, uh... don't seem to be in uniform," says the girl. "May I, um... see your ID, please?"

For an agent of an oppressive supercorporate paramilitaristic takeover, she's awfully polite. Must be a mook thing. Nicolas takes a deep breath and focuses. AGH. SPLITTING. HEADACHE. He lifts his illusioned' wallet up and flips out the driver's license. She glances at it. "... mkay, yeah. Didn't know Victor had any visitors today."

... Victor isn't the mayor's name. Nevertheless, it's somehow familiar.
>>
No. 32310 ID: 7eda8b

>>32307
Maybe it'll get less painful with practice. If not it'd probably be easier to just commission a fake ID.

Continue inward. Pause to let your head cool off so you can focus on being suave, sneaky, and deceptive.
>>
No. 32311 ID: f4963f
File 125083537822.jpg - (151.71KB , 900x695 , Ch2_Mayor_03.jpg )
32311

In this state, all Nicolas can really do is nod and try not to show how much his head frickin' hurts. He enters the gates, pockets the wallet, and releases his focus. GOD. Head is BURNING. Nicolas... isn't sure how many times he's going to be able to pull that off.

Anyway, Nicolas is in the yard of the mayor's office now.
>>
No. 32313 ID: 9e9b47

>>32311

Hopefully those two goons were the only ones we had to dismiss with a falsified ID. Let's head inside and see if we can find out who this Victor guy is. Try to be cool and collected. You're wearing special getup because you're above them in teh hierarchy, after all.
>>
No. 32320 ID: 5fe4a8

Yeah, take a moment to refresh your cool. If we have time later, maybe some mental exercises are in order, but don't give yourself an aneurysm. Keep the shades on so you look like you belong here, and go in as soon as you're ready.
>>
No. 32467 ID: 6164e0

>>32311
Well, maybe it will hurt less with more use.

Flexing your brain muscles, as it were.

And don't look at me with such consternation about brain muscles! You know it is a common trop that practice with a new power invariably makes the user more capable and accustomed to it, even (especially) if they claim the power is eating away at them. Notice how they just end up getting stronger and surviving till the end of the story?
>>
No. 32608 ID: f4963f
File 125090772242.jpg - (124.56KB , 877x570 , Ch2_Mayor_04.jpg )
32608

>>32310
>>32320
>Chillax
Nicolas takes a minute to steel his nerves. He always considered himself a man of good mental fortitude, but using his shard is quite difficult. After about half a minute, Nicolas regains his composure. Innerly, at least. Outwardly, nobody could ever tell, right?

>>32467
>Genre savvy observation about psychic tropes
That much is true. Nicolas just needs a little time to cool down, lets he strain his brain.

>>32313
>So who is this Victor guy?
Nicolas enters the mayor's office. The building design's quite simple, with a few branching hallways diverting from a path that leads straight to the mayor's desk. Nicolas takes the straight route.

Behind the desk is a man in MIB supervisor shades. He's leaning back in his chair, grinning to himself, and the nameplate on the desk reads VICTOR RADLEY.

Oh god damnit. Not him. Nicolas knows this guy. He's Paraply's top lawyer. The guy's good - really good. Nicolas really ticked him off when he threw off the guy's otherwise perfect court record in that case one year ago. Ever since then, Victor's sort of treated Nicolas as an arch-rival, but the feeling's always been one-sided. Nicolas just doesn't /care/ about the guy.

And now he's dressed up in an MIB Supervisor's outfit, sitting back at the mayor's desk. God Damnit.

"Ah, Mister Zere. My arch-rival."

"Hello, Victor."

"What can I do for you?"
>>
No. 32612 ID: 2af4d3

>>32608
Where's the Mayor? And don't say "You're looking at him". Where's the proper Mayor.
>>
No. 32666 ID: f4963f
File 125091419041.jpg - (122.14KB , 877x570 , Ch2_Mayor_05.jpg )
32666

>>32612
>Where's the Mayor? And don't say "You're looking at him". Where's the proper Mayor.

Victor smirks. "You're looking a- oh." His face falls flat. "What can I say? He turned tail and fled into the city. Just like any politician, amirite?"

"... we're both lawyers, Victor," replies Nicolas dryly. "I don't think we're entitled to make profession jokes."

"You might be, Mister Zere," says Victor. "But unlike you? I'm going somewhere. Do you know who I am? Do you really think you know who I am? Let me tell you who I am, Mister Zere. I'm Rastin's right-hand man, and we're going to rule the world." He pauses. "He's gonna give me Australia. I've always liked Australia, you know."
>>
No. 32672 ID: bde1b8

>>32666
...Australia? You HAVE read TVTropes, right?

The evil overlords give Australia to the underlings they don't CARE about. Australia is like that christmas card nobody in your family likes so they pass it around to someone new every year. Apparently he thinks you're just barely important enough to not kill, but not so important you deserve anything NICE.

You're getting JIPPED, dude.
>>
No. 32675 ID: 1afd58

>>32666
Pet the adorable dog.
>>
No. 32827 ID: f4963f
File 125093068661.jpg - (117.75KB , 698x576 , Ch2_Mayor_06.jpg )
32827

>>32672
>Australia?! Aren't you genre savvy at ALL?
"Oh, I know," says Victor dismissively. "Australia's a throwaway country. I'm not really in it for Australia anyway. I'd tell you all about my plans, but... you know? You're going to be dead soon anyway."

Nuts. Nicolas was really hoping he'd be the type to spout off his evil plan. Victor's certainly self-absorbed enough.

"Dead, you say," says Nicolas.

"Yes," says Victor with a smile. "You see, I hate your guts."
>>
No. 32828 ID: f4963f
File 125093071044.jpg - (179.95KB , 585x450 , Ch2_Mayor_07.jpg )
32828

>>32675
>Pet the adorable dog.
Nicolas is /really/ more of a cat person. This thing's like a hyperactive dustmop on crack. But... well... but...

OKAY. But only because you told him to.

Victor looks at Nic in an annoyed manner. "Get your hands off my dog," he growls.

Nicolas reluctantly obliges.
>>
No. 32829 ID: f4963f
File 125093073642.jpg - (131.43KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_08.jpg )
32829

"There's just one thing I want you to know before you die," says Victor, reaching for his shades. "The media takeover... the ROFLDOGS, the deletion of the entire LOLCAT archives?"
>>
No. 32830 ID: f4963f
File 125093076048.jpg - (136.76KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_09.jpg )
32830

"... that was me."
>>
No. 32832 ID: 6faa8c

>>32830
A SEALED EYE FFFFFFFFFF HE'S A SUMMONER!
>>
No. 32834 ID: bde1b8

>>32830
Punch him! Right over the table!

Declare FISTICUFFS! as you do so.
>>
No. 32837 ID: bd2eec

>>32834
Words won't work here, Nickyboy.

Combine SWEET MARKSMANSHIP, STYLISH GRACE and your DERRINGER into one smooth move.

And blow Victor's other eye out.

Finish with a witty one-liner.
>>
No. 32840 ID: e55c57

>>32837
This, but with the thaumic disruptor.
>>
No. 32872 ID: 7eda8b

Go for the disruptor.

If that doesn't work, aim your gun at his dog.
>>
No. 33529 ID: f4963f
File 125108250343.jpg - (104.44KB , 785x675 , Ch2_Mayor_10.jpg )
33529

>>32832
>FFFFF HE'S A SUMMONER!
Nicolas isn't sure what the significance of the eye is, but he knows enough about movie tropes to know that Victor's new FREAKY EYE isn't just cosmetic.
>>
No. 33530 ID: f4963f
File 125108253526.jpg - (129.78KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_11.jpg )
33530

>>32837
>Draw Derringer. Put out his other eye.
This ends now.

"That's quite cute. I'm amused. Go ahead, Nicolas. Pull the trigger."

Victor is completely unfazed.
>>
No. 33531 ID: f4963f
File 125108255769.jpg - (140.02KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_12.jpg )
33531

>>32837
>Thaumic Disruptor.
That seems to get Victor's attention. "Where on earth did you get- no, it's not important. What's important is the effects of using that thing right now. Mister Zere, would you like to be known as the man who ended the world?"
>>
No. 33532 ID: 6faa8c

>>33531
He's talking about the globe on the fucking desk.

Use it.
>>
No. 33541 ID: 01383e

>>33531
honestly, being known as the man who ended the world sounds like the best possible title someone on the world could hope to achieve. it basically means you beat everyone else.
>>
No. 33560 ID: 576388

Though it wouldn't hurt to ask what he means first.
>>
No. 33584 ID: 7eda8b

He's bluffing. If he had a magical effect in his eye even tangentially related to world-ending power, there's no way we could've just walked up to him and drawn a gun.
>>
No. 33607 ID: a0aa05

Dude. Straighten that top hat.
>>
No. 33620 ID: e55c57

Well, with the LOLcat archives gone, there's no reason not to destroy the earth.
And on the off-chance that he's bluffing, you've still disarmed your nemesis.
>>
No. 33636 ID: f4963f
File 125109055696.jpg - (128.33KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_13.jpg )
33636

>>33584
>He's Bluffing
Quite possible. Much like Nicolas, Victor is also a PROFESSIONAL BULLSHITTER. He does genuinely seem much more worried about the disruptor than the pistol, though. Hm.

>>33584
>If he had a magical effect in his eye even tangentially related to world-ending power, there's no way we could've just walked up to him and drawn a gun.
"If you had world-ending power at your fingertips, I'd already be dead. I'm calling bullshit."

"Not all world-ending power is smite-on-sight, Mister Zere. How do you think Rastin took control of the media airwaves, the radio, and the entire internet?"

>>33560
>Though it wouldn't hurt to ask what he means first.
"Rastin has a bigass magic crystal, that's how. What does that have to do with your eye?"

"Ah, so you know about the crystal. But no, it's only related tangentially to the cause. That's how he got the zombies, sure. It's also been responsible for weird things appearing. But the technological takeover, Mr Zere - I'm the one doing it, and I'm using a bit of help. I'd ask if you're familiar with the name Vresch, but you wouldn't be."

Nicolas gets the nagging feeling that he should really know that name.

"He's... an extraplanar being that controls technology. I'm using him to control the internet. I am also his restraining bolt. My goals aren't quite the same as his, but as long as my mindlink remains intact, I can keep him in check."

"Now you're just making shit up."

"I shit you not, Mr. Zere."

"So you get control over the entire internet, and the first thing you do is nuke LOLCATS?"

"Yes, Mr. Zere. Just to piss you off." ... "Get off the table, Mappy."
>>
No. 33640 ID: a0aa05

Fuck this, shoot him.
>>
No. 33652 ID: 5fe4a8

Even if that's true, which I doubt it is, it wouldn't explain why he wasn't worried about the gun.
>>
No. 33656 ID: 2af4d3

>>33636
Now Nicolas think: Despite being a being from another plane, could Vresch be worse than this dick who took away LOLcats? No, it's not possible.

Shoot the bastard.
>>
No. 33658 ID: 01383e

>>33640
seconded, fuck this guy.

though, I don't KNOW this guy. why are we shooting him? would kneecapping him be as good?
>>
No. 33664 ID: bde1b8

"Well that's all very well, but frankly I'm just a lawyer. I don't give a damn about your fancy ruling of the world or any of that."

"No, I am here today on business. Mister New Mayor, I am here to submit a FORMAL COMPLAINT about the lack of Lolcats from the internet, and am threatening you with legal action. Good day to you, SIR!"

Then walk right back out.
>>
No. 33665 ID: 01383e

>>33640
>>33652
>>33656
>>33658
I wonder- are we ALL dedicated to continuing quest-time-continuums? if so... what will the eventual unified storyline that the crossovers make look like?
>>
No. 33669 ID: bde1b8
File 125109187125.png - (19.93KB , 350x350 , It Is A Mistery.png )
33669

>>33665
>>
No. 33670 ID: 5fe4a8

>>33665
We already saw it. It's a wasteland.

That's probably our fault too.
>>
No. 33673 ID: 782100

>>33636
Don't feel rushed into shooting him. If you miss this chance, I'm sure you'll get another.
>>
No. 33674 ID: 2af4d3

>>33665
Well Rastin's alive in Gnome's but he died in Kara Quest so it's already kind of messed up... unless we resurrect him at some time.
>>
No. 33677 ID: 782100

>>33674
He didn't seem too torn about that one clone that was killed. Besides, you could just slap glasses on anyone and call them Rastin. He isn't special in of himself, he just has that crystal.
>>
No. 33688 ID: 5fe4a8

Maybe "Rastin" is more of a title than a name.
>>
No. 33694 ID: 01383e

>>33674
kara... didn't... kill him?
>>
No. 33696 ID: 9e9b47

Guys there's a topic for crossover talk on /questdis/. Should probably move this there.

>>33636

Shoot the bastard. I think he's bluffing.
>>
No. 33738 ID: f4963f
File 125109979174.jpg - (149.12KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_14.jpg )
33738

>>33640
>Fuck this, shoot him.
>>33656
>He took away LOLcats. Shoot the bastard.
>>33658
>Fuck this guy.
>>33696
>Shoot the bastard, he's bluffing.
Nicolas is all too happy to oblige.

The disrupter shoots out a little wave. A previously unseen psionic shield as well as some sort of magic enhancement to Victor's suit both fizzle away. Victor's eye shoots out a small jet of blood, and the lawyer clutches his eye.

"Oh, is that why you were so confident about the pistol?"
>>
No. 33742 ID: f4963f
File 125110043519.jpg - (176.07KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_15.jpg )
33742

"You... you IDIOT!" Victor scrambles to his feet, still clutching his face. "Do you have ANY IDEA what you just did?!"

"I am here today on business. Mister New Mayor, I am here to submit a FORMAL COMPLAINT about the lack of Lolcats from the internet. I trust it will find you shortly."
>>
No. 33743 ID: f4963f
File 125110048119.jpg - (149.51KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_16.jpg )
33743

>>32837
>Use Derringer. Put out his other eye.
BANG! Nicolas expends the remaining round in his Derringer. He's not an experienced gunman, but the range is point blank. The shot goes right into Victor's neck. Victor gurgles a little and slumps to the ground behind the desk.
>>
No. 33745 ID: f4963f
File 125110051959.jpg - (103.10KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_17.jpg )
33745

... Nicolas gets the feeling that he's been detected.
>>
No. 33750 ID: a0aa05

No, see what you should have done is put on some glasses, then said:

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to..."
*whip sunglasses off*
"...file a formal complaint."

BLAM
>>
No. 33751 ID: 7eda8b

Remain cool. Walk until you're out of sight. If you run they'll immediately tackle you. If you walk they'll be suspicious but hopefully will take several seconds to figure out what happened. Seconds you can use to make your escape.

Once you're out of sight, THEN start running.
>>
No. 33755 ID: 242920

>>33745
Use LAWYERLY CUNNING to convince them that you are now the mayor (and their boss) by rights of succession.
>>
No. 33804 ID: f98e0b

>>33745
Put on those rastinglasses you snatched off the scrubber (did you get his badge too?) and tell them you're an agent from Rastin sent to kill this guy for being too controlling or trying to undermine him or something. He did say something about "keeping him in check" after all
>>
No. 33826 ID: f4963f
File 125113787456.jpg - (104.23KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_18.jpg )
33826

>>33755
>BY NATURAL LAW I AM YOUR NEW MAYOR.
Even Nicolas' ability to BULLSHIT isn't /that/ high.
>>
No. 33827 ID: f4963f
File 12511379115.jpg - (104.17KB , 523x675 , Ch2_Mayor_19.jpg )
33827

>>33751
>Walk, then run.
Right then. Nicolas begins to make his way towards the entrance. Two MIBs are approaching him rapidly, weapons drawn. Both Sweepers from the look of it.

"... you," says the closer one, gesturing with is gun. "Stay right there or I'll shoot. Did you just assault Mister Ridley?"

"What gave you the impression?"
>>
No. 33828 ID: f4963f
File 125113793837.jpg - (112.94KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_20.jpg )
33828

. . .
>>
No. 33829 ID: f4963f
File 125113796742.jpg - (100.33KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_21.jpg )
33829

The guy reaches for his radio. "Agent Voku here. We have a class 38-B situation, requesting assistance..."

Well crap. Nicolas makes a run for it.

We're currently in the mayor's office. There's a stone path leading straight to the large iron gates forwards; there are at least a few MIBs out in the open between Nicolas and the gates there. There are also hallways that branch LEFT and RIGHT in the building. It's possible that there are other entrances Nicolas could leave through, and there are several WINDOWS along the building.

From here, it looks like we could either CHARGE STRAIGHT or DIVERT down a side-path. The entire yard is surrounded by a fence, but even with his trifling MIGHT, Nicolas should be able to hoist himself over on pure adrenaline. His car's parked out front, but that also seems to be the most heavily guarded area.

We need an escape plan!
>>
No. 33834 ID: 7eda8b

Run to a first-story room. Prop a chair up against the doorknob to pin it shut. Then, jump out the window.
>>
No. 33835 ID: ed8d8a

Why are you not wearing yellow glasses? that's practically a whole disguise right there.
>>
No. 33866 ID: 01383e

>>33828
>that dog

JESUS CHRIST

GO BACK FOR THE DOG

LOOK AT IT YOU MONSTER
>>
No. 33890 ID: 4902ae

>>33866
It's actually Vresch.
>>
No. 34985 ID: f4963f
File 125126906990.gif - (116.18KB , 439x338 , Ch2_Mayor_22.gif )
34985

>>33866
>JESUS CHRIST
>GO BACK FOR THE DOG
>LOOK AT IT YOU MONSTER
What?! Nicolas is running for his life here! I-it's not even that cute a dog! And he's a cat person! Why should he save this lonely...

... scared dog... who now has no owner and...

GOD DAMNIT.

>Animooted
>>
No. 34986 ID: f4963f
File 125126912634.jpg - (153.48KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_23.jpg )
34986

Dog gotten.
>>
No. 34988 ID: f4963f
File 125126915229.jpg - (141.98KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_24.jpg )
34988

FUCK, they're shooting!
>>
No. 34989 ID: f4963f
File 125126918452.jpg - (122.97KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_25.jpg )
34989

Memo to self: 'Bulletproof' is a misnomer. Recommend product be renamed 'Bullet resistant vest'. Also, ow.

>>33834
>>33835
>Barricade self into a room. Slip on disguise. Exit window.

That sounds like a plan. Nicolas runs for his life. Thankfully, they're mostly throwing bullets at him from a range, so he has enough of a lead to make it work.

Nicolas puts on his disguise and covers up the wound as well as he can. He slips open the window.
>>
No. 34990 ID: f4963f
File 125126921822.jpg - (113.74KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_26.jpg )
34990

Nicolas has appeared in the EAST LAWN. He is MODERATELY WOUNDED. He doesn't think anybody saw him.

Right across from him is the fence; however, this is the fence to the EAST side of the building, and we're parked up front. They may have also stationed guards in the parking lot, and this bullet wound sure does look damn suspicious.

Do we want to get our car back, or ditch it? Either way, what's our plan of attack?
>>
No. 34994 ID: bde1b8

>>34990
Hop the fence, circle perimeter to car, see if you can sneak on into it. If not, we're legging it.
>>
No. 35006 ID: 6164e0

>>34989
Why, that is false advertising!

Make a mental note to bring this up in a lawyerly fashion next time you are at Ignometrics, potentially for free upgrade to desired product, or some other settlement.
>>
No. 35008 ID: 7eda8b

Return to your GIANT CAR. We cannot spare it!
>>
No. 35021 ID: e55c57

Turn the psychic disguise mojo back on. You got winged by the suspect, who is escaping on foot, and you'll need the car in order to chase him down.

Failing that, use the dog as a hostage.
>>
No. 35649 ID: f4963f
File 125151459050.jpg - (139.68KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_27.jpg )
35649

>>34994
>>35008
>Check on car
Nicolas would really prefer to salvage the car if he can. He clammers over the fence. Mappy squeezes in through the bars.

Nicolas circles around to the front parking lot.

It looks like there are two sweepers here. Actually, they look a little familiar...
>>
No. 35655 ID: 95484a

Use MINOR TELEKINESIS to create a distraction!
>>
No. 35656 ID: bde1b8

>>35649
The Roflcar's tire seems a bit flat... Hmm. I have no idea how that helps!

Well, lets see if we can't use our MINOR ILLUSIONS to make a wandering MIB look like you.
>>
No. 35664 ID: f4963f
File 125152139864.jpg - (107.70KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_28.jpg )
35664

>>35656
>Illusion to make an MIB look like you.
That might be hard to do. First of all, the illusion would be larger than the last one, the ID, and that was hard enough. Second, it would be exceptionally difficult to make the illusion follow the MIB's movements exactly. He might be able to disguise /himself/ in the future, but he's already strained his untrained powers today. Attempting too much could make Nicolas black out or... something. Nicolas has no idea what happens when he overloads his brain, but he's not too keen on trying it.

>>35655
>MINOR TELEKINESIS to create a distraction!
Nicolas thinks he might be able to pull off either a minor illusion or a minor act of telekinesis today. He's going to need specific ideas, though. What sort of distraction?
>>
No. 35667 ID: 1f5d37

Lets rustle the bushes at the far corner of the fence/as far away from us as possible but nearby enough to get these two's attention.
>>
No. 35668 ID: 43d730

>>35664
Have a gun go off around the corner, blackjack the other one with SNEAKY?

Untie their shoes, lead them a merry chase, then drive off?

Sever or compress major nerves in the brain?
>>
No. 35669 ID: e3f578

No, wait, take a closer look. Maybe their old friends, hell, Victor was your rival, who knows who's working for these kooks. They might even be Lolcats sympathizers.
>>
No. 35672 ID: bde1b8

Wait a second.

Just hit the alarm button on your car keys. That'll be distracting enough.
>>
No. 35674 ID: f4963f
File 125152791823.jpg - (107.74KB , 877x639 , Ch2_Mayor_29.jpg )
35674

>>35669
>They might be comerades!
Nic thinks you failed a check there. By 'they look familiar' he meant 'they're the exact two who were previously guarding the front gate.'
>They might be lolcats sympathizers?
Maybe?

>>35667
>Sever or compress major nerves in the brain?
Nic doesn't have the ability to cut with his mind! Besides, he's pretty sure his psychic powers cannot attack internal organs directly. Maybe if their brains were directly exposed, but it would be kind of redundant at that point, ne?

>Have a gun go off around the corner.
There's two possible things you could mean here. It's possible that you mean that Nicolas should create an AUDIO ILLUSION, which he can do. Easier than a visual one, actually. Gunfire isn't particularly complex, just loud.
The other is that he should manipulate a gun, which he could probably do. Fine manipulation of an object requires good LOGIC, but that's not a problem for Nicolas.
Since we haven't seen any guns lying around the corner, Nicolas is going to assume you mean the FORMER.

>Untie their shoes!
Nicolas only wishes this were Benny Hill.

Alright, AUDIBLE DISTRACTION it is. Gunfire's as good as anything.
>>
No. 35675 ID: f4963f
File 125152794133.jpg - (131.51KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_30.jpg )
35675

>BANG! BANG! BANG!
Nicolas clutches his head and his vision tunnels a little. The effect wears off after only a moment, but there's a lingering effect that feels like an ice cream headache. But that's just psychic weakness leaving the body, right?

The noise definitely gets their attention. The brute with the bubble gum begins moving to the corner. The woman steps a little to the side and begins to talk into her headset.

The distraction will only last for so long.
>>
No. 35676 ID: bde1b8

>>35675
CHAAAARGE! Knock the woman aside with your shoulder, and get into the vehicle as fast as humanly possible!
>>
No. 35678 ID: 9e9b47

>>35675

She might get a shot off. Take her hostage. You can release her later, but use BULLETLESS DERRINGER to threaten chick and bring her with you. She might have an idea of where Rastin is.
>>
No. 35679 ID: 33bb8b

Why do we care where Rastin is? We already avenged lolcats, the next task should be to work on rebuilding from the ashes of society. We must make it home and take pictures of Skimbleshanks, then put funny captions under them and post them to the internet. For great justice.
>>
No. 35680 ID: 95484a

>>35678
Bulletless derringer? Didn't we steal a whole new gun from an agent earlier?
>>
No. 35713 ID: 904da4

Indeed we did. Unless I missed something, we should still have a loaded MACHINE PISTOL.
>>
No. 35721 ID: 01383e

>>35713
aren't we doing the DERRINGER CLASSY special achievement where our only firearm is the derringer?
>>
No. 35739 ID: 9e9b47

>>35713

I forgot about the machine ostol. Use that then, unless you think you might set it off, in which case use Derringer. I dunno how adept (lol) Nic is with firearms apart from Derringer.

Get the chick to drive so you can keep the gun on her and pay attention.
>>
No. 35798 ID: 33bb8b

>>35721
Yeah, I thought we were going for the achievement here.
>>
No. 35893 ID: f4963f
File 125158466584.jpg - (131.44KB , 714x642 , Ch2_Mayor_31.jpg )
35893

>>35678
>Take her hostage so we don't get shot on the way out.
Alright then! Nicolas considers using the machine pistol, but for some reason decides to go for the Derringer because it's more stylish. It's not like we're /really/ going to fire, anyway, right? And Nic's liable to shoot himself in the foot if he tries firing the machine pistol one-handed. The lawyer closes in on his prey, and begins to make out the conversation she's having.

"Y'know, I thought I'd get a l-litte more respect, being on the frontlines for you asswipes." Staticy reply. "YEAH! A-Asswipe! Like something you wipe your ass on! That's what you are!" Staticy reply. "No, I don't think I will. In fact, I'm through with your bullshit. I fucking QUIT." She throws down her gun in disgust. She also throws down her shades and her badge, then chucks the radio against a car farther down the parking lot. It skitters across the lot. "G-god, that felt good," she says.
>>
No. 35895 ID: f4963f
File 125158471139.jpg - (255.99KB , 1384x1350 , Ch2_Mayor_32.jpg )
35895

She begins walking out of the lot.

Wait, what?
>>
No. 35896 ID: 43d730

>>35893
Wait for her to leave.
I suspect a trap.
>>
No. 35897 ID: f98e0b

>>35893
Invite stuttering scrubber to party
>>
No. 35899 ID: bde1b8

...CONVENIENT!

Toss Mappy in the back seat, and lets get the fuck out of here!
>>
No. 35901 ID: 9e9b47

>>35895

Take off glasses, catch up to girl. Tell her it'd probably be better if the two of you found a safe place to hide for now, before Mr. Big Bubblegum comes back. Take one of the cars and GET.
>>
No. 35903 ID: cd08c0

>>35893
Ask her if she wants to join the party. We can do awesome things together~ And you'll give her all the respect she wants~
Try to sound really sexy while you say it.
>>
No. 35904 ID: 0a81ea

After talking with her, whether she joins or not, grab what she threw down.
>>
No. 35955 ID: f4963f
File 125158884433.jpg - (142.96KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_33.jpg )
35955

>>35896
>I suspect a trap.
More likely a reverse trap!

>>35897
>>35901
>>35903
>>35904
>Catch up to that sweeper!
Right. Nicolas rushes up to her, removing his twenty five cent disguise as he does so. He switches them out for the magic-detecting glasses that would have /really/ helped him out in Victor's office. Damnit, gotta wear these more often. "Excuse me," he says.

The agent turns around. "Oh. Y-you're the guy from before." She waves a hand dismissively. "The car's yours. I don't give a fuck." She glances to his wound. "Wait, are you the guy who killed Victor?"
>>
No. 35959 ID: 95484a

>>35955
Maybe. Wait, what wound?
>>
No. 35961 ID: f4963f

>>35959
Artistic error. Nic's still got the woundy... bleedy spot. He's SLIGHTLY WOUNDED.
>>
No. 35969 ID: 789c25

>>35955
"Yep. And incidentally, I couldn't help overhearing you on the radio a few moments ago. It's probably best to stay where these fellows can't find you. You might be interested in coming with me?"
>>
No. 35977 ID: f98e0b

>>35955
A little bit, yeah
>>
No. 36024 ID: f4963f
File 125159640762.jpg - (173.27KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Mayor_34.jpg )
36024

>>35969
>>35977
"Yeah. Anyway, I overheard your-"

"Oh thank God! I hated that douchebag."

Nicolas can't say he disagrees with her. Still, the bubblegum brute's going to return soon. This is not time for pleasantries! "It's probably best to stay where these fellows can't find you. You might be interested in coming with me?"

She stares at Nicolas blankly for a moment. "Well, I guess with you is as good as anywhere else. I'm just sick of being a f-fucking mook." She hesitates. "Did you know we don't get health care?! We don't even get dental!"

"It's almost like they don't expect you to need it," says Nicolas, as he throws Mappy into the back seat.

"E-exactly!" she stammers. "I mean, /hello/?! I work a boring desk office job for ten years at Paraply and then they're like 'oh hey, you're a field agent now, here's a liability form and here's a waiver.'"

Nicolas picks up the dropped items and gets into the car. The defecting agent follows. Mappy seems pleased. He pulls out of the parking lot and makes his way into the city. "By the way, do you mind if I ask for your name?"

"Agent Grey," she says. "Er, sorry, reflex. Um. J-Joel. My name is Joel."

"Nicolas Zere," says Nicolas.

Nicolas reloads his Derringer and goes through his possessions.

>>== INVENTORY ==
>Weapons: Derringer Pistol (ammo x2), Walther PPK (ammo x8), Machine Pistol (ammo x30)
>Magic Shit: Magic Glasses, Reinforced Business Suit, Cure Potion x3, Disruptor (charges x4), Psychic Crystal
>Other: Fuel Can, Cane, Fancy Lawyer Pen, Joel's MIB badge
>>
No. 36025 ID: f4963f
File 125159644637.jpg - (133.86KB , 825x675 , Ch2_Underway_01.jpg )
36025

Alright, Nicolas is underway. It's getting late now; is there anything we still want to do?
>>
No. 36027 ID: cd08c0

>>36025
Have we eaten yet? Let's go get sammiches.
>>
No. 36056 ID: bde1b8

>>36027
And coffee. It'll be a date!
>>
No. 36057 ID: 9e9b47

>>36025

Let's go make sandwiches at the house. Plus, internet checking.
>>
No. 36079 ID: 789c25

>>36057
We've got a lady with us. That'd be a bit untoward.
>>
No. 36439 ID: f4963f
File 125174758265.jpg - (197.45KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_01.jpg )
36439

>Sammiches and coffee
Home outvooted~
The Seven Deadly Sammiches it is.

... What the hell happened here?

Somehow, the place is still open. Nicolas buys sandwiches for the both of them and takes a seat at... well, the only intact table. The place got sort of trashed.
>>
No. 36440 ID: f4963f
File 12517476105.jpg - (146.84KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_02.jpg )
36440

As he does so, Nicolas begins to think. He's not really sure where to go next. His self-proclaimed arch rival, the SIC of Paraply Incorporated, is dead. He claimed to have been responsible for LOLcats' disappearance. If that's true, then he's just avenged the website, but whether or not it'll come back online now is still unknown. Nic hasn't had a chance to see what the status of it is now.

He's also just encountered Agent Grey, or Joel, as it were. A defecting mook? She seems sympathetic enough, and that stutter's just a little cute. Though he still knows nothing about her.

Nic figures that his first priority should be to check on the status of the site. After that, though, he doesn't have any immediate goals. Perhaps he could use some? This crushing-the-world-under-our-heel thing that the MIB are doing doesn't seem all that good.

Nicolas' thoughts are interrupted by a man in a gaudy outfit with ruby-red hair and bright blue eyes. This is Tyrael, the owner of the Seven Deadly Sammiches, as well as the owner of several other local businesses. Nicolas knows him well. In the background is Tamana, his assistant manager who gets paid way less than she should for having to put up with him.

Tyrael smiles broadly. "See, Tamana? I told you. Our sandwiches are /so good/ that customers will come by even when our front lot is on fire. They just can't resist our sandwiches. They're just that good."

Tamana shoots a bitter glare at the back of his neck, but responds with a sweet voice. "Of course, Tyrael. You're always right, Tyrael~" ... she makes a little stabbing motion with her hands and then goes back to wiping the grime off of the counter. ... Tyrael's suit doesn't have so much as a smudge on it.

"What can we do for our esteemed customers?" Asks Tyrael, with a smile.
>>
No. 36442 ID: 01383e

>>36440
oh my god this guy is awesome

order some sammiches, and tip well
>>
No. 36443 ID: cd08c0

>>36440
Sammiches would be nice. And a place to sit. Let's take this opportunity to ask Joel about herself over food. Why she worked with Paraply, what she knows, does she have any hobbies?
Also, ask Tyrael what the HELL happened to this place. Completely ignoring Tamana, who is obviously not as important.
>>
No. 36499 ID: f4963f
File 125175195280.jpg - (156.71KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_03.jpg )
36499

>>36442
>Order some sammiches and tip well.
"We'll have two of your deadly sammiches, please."

"Certainly," croons Tyrael. He claps his hands twice. "Tamana! Two deadly sandwiches for our lovely guests~"

Tamana visibly wilts and walks into the back.

>36443
>Ask Joel about herself.
"So, um. Fed up with your job?"

"Y-yeah," she says. "Oh, could I have an iced tea, please...?"

"But of course," says Tyrael. He turns. "Oh Tamana, dearest~ one iced tea with those sammies."

"Tell me a little about that," says Nicolas. "Oh, and could I have a coffee?"

"Of course, sir," says Tyrael. "Our service is the best. ... TAMANA!"

A clatter comes from the back room.

"... one hot coffee with that."

There's a pause, and then a sweet voice comes from the back room with just a slightly venomous undertone. "Yes, sir~"

"Well, Paraply used to be a prosthetics company," says Joel. "I was a receptionist there for about ten years. R-really simple stuff, y'know? But then two years, magic appeared, and... and they began studying. Studying, um. How to. Regrow limbs! With magic."

"That's when they began patenting a bunch of psionic stuff," says Nicolas.

"R-right. So it was prettymuch just-just us and Ignometics, that had a monopoly on magic. And then that g-guy Rastin came in, and... well, things changed? And I got appointed to a sweeper position."

"And before that, it was prettymuch just a day job," says Nicolas.

"R-right!" she says. "But when they learned I could handle a gun, I was swept into some sort of generic stormtrooper position. The guy I worked under was a real asswipe."
>>
No. 36541 ID: f4963f
File 125175567438.jpg - (173.97KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_04.jpg )
36541

>>36443
>Ask Tyrael what the HELL happened to this place?
Tyrael says that a place as class as his is bound to attract very ADVENTUROUS types. Some valkyrie-chick beat the crap out of some MIBs earlier and set the lot on fire with her shotgun. "Which you have to admit, is really cool," says Tyrael. "She's almost as awesome as me~"

Tamana comes in from the back with a tray and a dour expression. She dishes out sandwiches and drinks. "Well look at us," she says, "sitting around in fancy business suits. Don't you just /love/ being able to dress up to go to a sandwich store? My, wouldn't it be /lovely/ to have that kind of money?"

"These are not mere /sandwiches/, my dear Tamana. These are sammiches. Deadly sammiches."

"Right. Anyway... The Prince for you, and The Envy for you." She hands out a few sammiches and heads to the back, muttering something about the size of Tyrael's head and why it won't fit up his ass.

>>36443
>Any hobbies?
Joel says she's an animal lover. She likes to look at pictures of cute baby animals online and subscribes to 'D'AWWW' magazine. She tried to learn needlepoint at one point but has given up on that.

"So... have you heard of LOLcats?"

"Well yeah, who hasn't? I-I think it's stupid that the MIB banned it from the internet. But it's not really worth making a big deal over. I mean. It's-It's just a website, right?"

Nicolas... is... confused. What are these nonsense words. They are nonsense.

"Besides, ROFLdogs are cute."

What.
>>
No. 36543 ID: 9891a9

>>36541
Oh NO she didn't.
>>
No. 36544 ID: 95484a

>>36541
This will have to be fixed. Show her the LOLcats. Expose her to the cute. Show her how evil the MIB were.
>>
No. 36546 ID: 6822a4

>>36541
She's ignorant, but stay calm, it can be remedied. You'll simply have to show her the best LOLcats can do. And there's nothing /inherently/ wrong with rofldogs, they are simply a pretender. Room exists for them on the sidelines.
>>
No. 36548 ID: cd08c0

>>36541
She's just an animal lover. A GENERIC Animal Lover. Argue that disallowing any kind of cute funny caption animals is an infringement on the freedoms of adorableness. LOLcats must be allowed to exist, or how will we be able to see pictures of adorable kittens? Nay, we must allow all manner of cute baby animals, so that people can decide for themselves which they like more and that LOLcats is CLEARLY SUPERIOR!!
... then realize that you're standing on the table shaking your fists to the heavens, cough embarrassedly and sit back down.

Ask Tyrael or Tamana if they would like to help you fight the MIBs who totaled their store. We're going to get revenge. They can get revenge, too! The more the merrier, right?
>>
No. 36571 ID: 6164e0

>>36541
Tip Tamana a minimum of 100 dollars.

She seems to love money, and her willingness to put up with Tyrael for low wages indicates she could very easily be hired.
>>
No. 36603 ID: f4963f
File 125176724582.jpg - (141.19KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_05.jpg )
36603

>>36543
>Oh NO she didn't.
Nicolas is bewildered.

>>36544
>>36546
>Convert her to LOLcats!
Nicolas sorely wishes he had access to a computer now. "Excuse me! Tyrael! Do you have internet access here?"

Joel gives Nicolas a confused look. Tyrael turns around and tosses his hair. "Of course we do! We're the best sammich store in the entire city. What kind of sammich store would lack internet access? Why, I'm such a genius, I managed to halve our subscription fees just by being awesome."

"You mean, Jeslyn is stealing the next door internet cafe's bandwidth and has been pocketing half the difference in fees," says Tamana, deadpan.

"No need to split hairs, Tamana. In any event, as an expression of my deep and profound generosity, I will allow you to use our interwebs for fifteen minutes for a mere dollar!"

"That's... that's fine," says Nicolas, suddenly stammering himself. "Miss Grey! I need to show you something. Something... profound." He hurries over to the computer in the corner and opens the browser.

"Um... o-okay?" Joel looks quite confused as she walks behind Nicolas. Nicolas has already typed in the address... let's see what the status of the site is.
>>
No. 36604 ID: f4963f
File 125176727722.jpg - (197.86KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_06.jpg )
36604

OH GLORIOUS DAY! That was... a lot faster than Nicolas expected! Victor died maybe an hour ago. Did the MIB really relinquish their grip on the internet that soon? Joel Grey leans over his shoulder and chuckles lightly. "D'awww... it's cute!"

Well that's a good sign. But wait... does this mean that our crusade against the MIB is over? That seemed a bit too easy, didn't it? But yes. We need to convert her to our side. Convert...

"You see, Miss Grey? Victor wanted to shut down this site JUST to troll me. And me specifically."

"Wow, really? That's kind of... p-pathetic. That sounds just like him."

Alright. We've got our sammiches. We've managed to check on the site, and it looks like things should be smooth sailing from here! Anything else we should do before heading home?
>>
No. 36612 ID: 6164e0

>>36604
Tip the fuck out of Tamana.

Ask her to come with you.
>>
No. 36615 ID: ed8d8a

click on kyaos.exe
>>
No. 36619 ID: cd08c0

>>36604
> ... does this mean that our crusade against the MIB is over?
Well, obviously we should continue looking into things. Who knows what the MIB will do, left unchecked?
Victor said something about acting as a restraining bolt. Which, if he's dead, means the power he had is running loose. That means there's something out there that could take away LOLcats anytime it wanted to. Or... replace ROFLdogs with LOLcats, if we control it.
We should look into that. Make sure it doesn't fall back into the hands of the MIB.
For purely altruistic reasons, of course.

Also ASK TYRAEL TO JOIN THE PARTY. Because he's awesome. So awesome. He does awesome things just by being awesome.
If Tyrael refuses, ask Tamana. Tell her she'll get to go on a fantastic adventure and Tyrael won't.
>>
No. 36621 ID: d7f745

Nothing will be decided until tomorrow, when we will find if the site has actually returned.

We cannot discount the possibility that this is a posthumous troll.

Remain on guard. Also sammiches.
>>
No. 36650 ID: 4270b5

>>36615
Haven't we done enough to destroy the world already? Oh, right. We haven't.
>>
No. 36677 ID: f4963f
File 125177443319.jpg - (100.05KB , 620x508 , Ch2_Sammich_07.jpg )
36677

>>36615
>>36650
>Click Kyaos.exe
Nicolas assumes you mean DOUBLE-click, you illiterate soccer mom.

The program opens, along with a little splash saying it was coded by some guy named Naveen. Nicolas doesn't particularly care.

It seems to be a game about a furry anthro bat-girl thing. Your objective is to collect pets for your bisexual harem by...

... GOD. Who would PLAY a game like this? Nicolas is pretty sure the characters in the game are lifted out of a comic series or something, and the menu alone tells him that the game itself is pretty amateur. Some neckbeard must have been up for hours in his basement lair coding this thing up. The thought kind of creeps Nicolas out.

Besides, a lady's watching over his shoulder. She's already getting a weird look.

Nicolas closes the program.

>( With a thousand apologies to Lucid, who makes lovely JQ material. <3 )
>>
No. 36679 ID: f4963f
File 125177445810.jpg - (118.43KB , 728x568 , Ch2_Sammich_08.jpg )
36679

>>336621
>We cannot discount the possibility that this is a posthumous troll.
>We must wait until tomorrow.
Nicolas agrees. This whole situation reeks of a fake-out ending. He's played way too many video games that've pretended to end on disk one to be put off guard by the likes of this.

>>36548
>>36571
>>36612
>>36619
>Ask Tyrael/Tamana to join the party!
They are prettymuch the first non-scientist, non-MIB people Nicolas has encountered. Nicolas wishes he could encounter MORE people who are NOT TRYING TO KILL HIM. Logically, they should join him.

He approaches Tyrael first and asks him if he would be interested in AVENGING the SLIGHT against his establishment that the MIB have made, what with blasting in the front wall and all. Tyrael informs Nicolas that although he could certainly take out a thousand MIBs if he really wanted, he's not particularly interested in doing so. His SAMMICH SHOP and a whole host of other businesses comes first. However, the MIBs are driving down business. He says that if Nicolas is really gung ho about stopping the MIBs, then he'd be willing to offer financial support to the tune of ONE (1) fuckton of money. Nicolas considers this proposal.

He pays for the bill, and offers Tamana a large tip. She stares down at the plate, then stares up at Nicolas. "What're you trying to pull?" she asked. "I treat you like crap. Are you throwing money around just for its own sake?"

"Would you be interested in helping us take out the MIB?"

She peers at the two of them. "... not really," she says. "I'm not very keen on getting myself killed."

It doesn't sound like either of them are taking the bait. This saddens Nicolas. Agh. But at least we have Grey on our side.

Anything else before home?
>>
No. 36726 ID: ab91ae

>>36679
Well, we need to first take the MIB's down a notch if we want that 1 (One) fuckton of cash, well don't we?

Time to go do some research on what a lone lawyer can do about this. Because I am pretty sure its illegal to overthrow the government.
>>
No. 36752 ID: cd08c0

>>36679
> ... be willing to offer financial support to the tune of ONE (1) fuckton of money.
Accept. We're going to look into the MIB anyway. And if, somehow, magically, the problem fixes itself, you can just take credit.
You're a lawyer. Who're people going to believe?

> "... not really," she says. "I'm not very keen on getting myself killed."
Tell Tamana you'd really appreciate her help.
And she can help you spend this fuckton of money you're getting from TYRAEL.
And, honestly, it's not like she has to act as a meatshield or anything. Mostly we just like making friends.
C'mon, Tamana... Wouldn't you like to do something amazing?

> Anything else before home?
Well, we could probably stop by the local weapons store and look around. There's gotta be SOMETHING that doesn't require a lot of training to do damage effectively.
Also maybe buy a bulletproof vest or something to go along with your bulletproof business suit. Something that can be worn underneath the suit.
And something for Joel.

We have a FUCKTON of money, for the love of god let's use it.
>>
No. 36756 ID: ab91ae

>Bulletproof
I HAD FORGOTTEN ENTIRELY!

We need to go deliver a legal complaint to Ignometrics for their false advertising about our bulletproof suit!
>>
No. 36878 ID: 629e90

>>36679
>ONE (1) fuckton of money
an English or metric fuckton?

We need to field-test the duct tape before we return to Ignometrics. Try patching up the front wall.

Suavely inquire as to Joel's relationship status.
>>
No. 36919 ID: f4963f
File 125184007187.jpg - (201.01KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Sammich_09.jpg )
36919

>>36878
>We need to test the duct tape
Oh yeah! Nicolas almost forgot about that. Although the entire front wall is in ruins, he could probably at least close the gap up a bit. He asks for Joel's help in lifting up some rubble to duct tape to the walls.

It works! At least partially. It would take hours and probably more duct tape than Nicolas has to repair the entire wall, but in theory this could be used to repair the front wall.

It's probably cheaper just to get a new damn wall, though.

>>36752
>PLZ Tamana PLZ??!?!
Not even cute puppy dog eyes work. She at least seems mollified by the wall repairs, though.

>Moneys Plz
Tyrael's more than happy to fund the MIB's HORRIBLE DOWNFALL. Nicolas' wealth level rises from WELL OFF to AFFLUENT.

>Sue Ignometics!
Nicolas imagines the scenario in his mind.
Nicolas: This bulletproof vest isn't immune to bullets! All it did was save me from a fatal gaping gut wound! What a rip-off!
Secretary: Sir, with all due respect, go fuck yourself.

... nah. Ignometics is his friend anyway.

>Weapons and armour
A new gun? But Nicolas thought we were going for the DERRINGER CLASSY achievement?
>>
No. 36921 ID: f4963f
File 125184014033.jpg - (152.61KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Trigger_01.jpg )
36921

Joel interrupts his train of thought. She'd apparently /love/ to go look at guns. Huh. He hadn't considered her the type. Okay. Happy Trigger it is!

>Relationship status?
Nicolas inquires along the way. Turns out she's single. Yay?!

Alright, here we are at the Happy Trigger. Nicolas' money should be enough to buy small arms, normal rifles, mods for small arms and rifles, and all the ammo he could ever want. The Happy Trigger also has undercover vests for sale, which should offer additional protection for his torso. They also look better than the standard-issue MIB under-vests that're handed out to sweepers (there's barely any protection at all! It's almost like they expect them to die in droves!), so that might be a good deal for Joel.

What shall we get?
>>
No. 36923 ID: fdc826

>>36921
For one, how about that Thompson on the wall with a few drum magazines? You may be a crappy shot, but hopefully you'll be able to hit something with all the ammo you'll be spraying.
>>
No. 36924 ID: 43d730

>>36921
Vest for the both of you and two or three guns for her.
It's like a date.
Also, do we have DERRINGER AMMO?
>>
No. 36928 ID: 4c0f77

>>36921
What kind of enhancements could be made to the Derringer, anything to help with precise aiming?
>>
No. 36929 ID: f4963f
File 125184119869.jpg - (129.80KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Trigger_02.jpg )
36929

>>36924
Nicolas has some Derringer ammo remaining in the car. However, it would be very easy to stock up on it here. The cost of ammo is trivial compared to the cost of magic upgrades and other expensive equipment.
>>
No. 36933 ID: ab91ae

>>36929
Acquire 20,000 ammos.
>>
No. 36934 ID: 789c25

>>36928
Laser sights are good for people who don't really know how to shoot. I'd recommend it for Nic.

Also, stock up on ammo, get defensive gear, and hook the lady up with a nice gun or two.
>>
No. 36945 ID: 29cd6d

Get her a Thompson so she can sweep whole groups of enemys. After all she is a Sweeper! *rimshot*
>>
No. 36946 ID: 43d730

>>36929
See if anything catches her eye.
Gushing over rate of fire or the ability to put holes in things messily is a good sign.
>>
No. 36964 ID: 961ddb

>>36929
Inquire with Joel as to if she knows how to aim a crossbow well enough to provide a more stealthy form of killing.
Also purchase ammu for Dewwingew
>>
No. 36981 ID: cd08c0

>>36921
... is that a bazooka?
>>
No. 36984 ID: f4963f
File 125184985889.jpg - (108.42KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Trigger_03.jpg )
36984

>>36981
>Is that a bazooka?
Why yes it, good sir! It happens to cost exactly one metric fuckton of money. However, all the stuff Nicolas was about to ring up (Two vests, tommy gun, Joel's gun, and a crapload of ammo) is also going to cost a metric fuckton of money. If Nicolas buys the bazooka on top of that, he'll end up spending TWO fucktons of money and dropping two wealth levels instead of one.

Do we wish to buy the bazooka?
>>
No. 36985 ID: ab91ae

What kind of dumb question is that?

Of COURSE we want to also buy the bazooka.
>>
No. 36986 ID: f78140

>>36984
given you can't fire the machine pistol, the bazooka is a poor choice. maybe some other time.
>>
No. 36993 ID: 9b5a49

>>36984
Naw dont get it
>>
No. 36994 ID: fdc826

>>36984
Don't get it, at least not yet.
>>
No. 36997 ID: f4963f
File 125185335841.jpg - (172.96KB , 877x675 , Ch2_Trigger_04.jpg )
36997

>>36986
>>36993
>>36994
>Death before poverty!
Hmm, you're probably right. Nicolas has never handled heavy weaponry in his life, and he's not keen on driving his wealth levels any lower. The bazooka will stay where it is... for now.

>>36928
>>36934
>Accuracy mod for Derringer?
>Laser sight for Derringer.
The Derringer is too compact for most conventional mods, and isn't built for range either. However, Nicolas could probably upgrade his Derringer magically at Ignometics. The Derringer's primary advantage is that its extremely small size makes it one of the best concealed carries you can pick off the shelf.

>>36924
>Two vests, ammo, and guns for the lady.
Nicolas is happy to oblige.

Wearing a concealed vest beneath his business suit is not comfortable, but it should protect Nicolas' vitals even more. Since the torso's the easiest spot to hit anyway, and he has a lot of /important/ things there he'd not like punctured, he likes this idea.

>Guns for Agent Grey!
"We should get you a Desert Eagle or something!"

Grey gives Nicolas a unicode stare. "Mister Zere, the Desert Eagle is unwieldy, has ridiculous recoil, and jams much easier than a real top-line gun. It's the freaking katana of pistols. I swear, i-it's like you learned your knowledge of firearms from video games or something."

Zeke golf claps in approval. Nicolas reminds himself not to talk guns with Grey.

Grey chooses out a Glock 17. Some sort of really accurate Austrian gun, apparently. Nic doesn't know.

>>36923
>>36945
>Thompson!
Okay, y'know, Nicolas doesn't know how to handle an automatic. And Grey probably doesn't really care for old models of gun. But it's a freaking TOMMY GUN. Nicolas has to buy it. On principle.

Okay! Final purchase is:
>2x Undercover Vests
>1x Tommy Gun!
>1x Glock 17 w/ laser sight
>1x Metric Fuckton of ammo. We're not gonna have to worry about ammo for any of these weapons for a while, guys. Seriously.

The combined cost of these items is enough to push Nicolas' wealth level back down from AFFLUENT to WELL-OFF. Damnit.

That makes our weapon inventory:
>1x Classy Derringer Pistol
>1x Machine Pistol
>1x Tommygun
>1x Walther PPK
>1x Glock 17 w/ Laser Sight

That's more than Nicolas is probably ever going to need.
>>
No. 36998 ID: f4963f
File 125185338752.jpg - (133.42KB , 825x675 , Ch2_Underway_02.jpg )
36998

>It's getting late.
Nicolas offers Joel a place to crash at his place. She's a little leery of his proposal, but he offers to sleep out in the living room while she takes his queen-sized bed. She agrees.
>>
No. 36999 ID: f4963f
File 125185341735.jpg - (129.10KB , 809x600 , Ch2_End_01.jpg )
36999

>Sleep
Nicolas crashes on the couch. It's been a long day.
>>
No. 37001 ID: f4963f
File 125185344116.jpg - (76.24KB , 877x675 , Ch2_End_Splash.jpg )
37001

-- Chapter Two End --
>>
No. 37017 ID: f4963f
File 125185617413.jpg - (181.81KB , 825x675 , Joel_Grey_Sheet.jpg )
37017

...
>>
No. 37018 ID: f4963f
File 125185620543.jpg - (183.04KB , 825x675 , Victor_Sheet.jpg )
37018

...
>>
No. 37032 ID: 034a30

>>37017
D'aaaaw.
>>
No. 37048 ID: 789c25

What model derringer does Nic have? On most models it totally is possible to put a laser sight. It does increase the overall mass a bit, of course, but it's possible. If the gun man lacked the appropriate stuff, that's pretty understandable, though. And chances are if Nic had a laser sight he'd take like 30 seconds a shot making sure the dot was exactly where he wanted it.

It might be a good idea to go down to the range with Joel to get the hang of things. I'm not sure where this town is located, but if there's wilderness nearby, we could go out and taking turns throwing crap for each other to shoot at.
Also, it's probably a good idea for Nic to get familiar with his Tommy.
>>
No. 37445 ID: 0d5afc

>>36997
>Grey chooses out a Glock 17. Some sort of really accurate Austrian gun, apparently. Nic doesn't know.
>Glock
>Nic doesn't know
ಠ_ಠ
>>
No. 37735 ID: 3530d1

>>36997

Hey, katanas may not be as big as European swords, or have the same crushing properties, but they excel against lightly armored opponents, weigh less, and can strike quicker. Against multiple opponents, they're a great choice of weaponry. And despite their appearance, they're not as fragile as you think. It's just the general "HURR JAP ARE SHIT LOL WEEABOO" attitude that overstates their weaknesses and raises stuff like claymores and longswords up on a pedastal.

What I'm trying to say is: the Desert Eagle may come in handy.
>>
No. 37887 ID: 55569e

Back up top.
>>
No. 38123 ID: 904da4

>>37735
The problem with Katanas is that they are ONLY good against light or unarmored targets. Fine edged weapons are great for cutting stuff like that, but quickly lose their edge against any sort of armor (god forbid a shield). The reason Katanas get smacked down so hard is because they get touted as being "the end-all, be-all" in swords by so many people who don't really know jack-crap about weaponry.

Against an armored target, Claymores and longswords are indeed far superior, and at least remain serviceable against lighter targets.
>>
No. 38129 ID: 01383e

>>38123
I think the point he's trying to make is something more along these lines-

in the modern day, where NOBODY wears armor, a katana has a distinct advantage over a claymore.

unless that magical crap counts as armor, that would mess up the plants of katanamen.
>>
No. 38134 ID: 43d730

Does someone need to bring in the Katana Troll?
>>
No. 38135 ID: 01383e

>>38134
please, if you DO bring it in, just put it in the discussion thread, not the quest one. I feel kinda bad for discussing here myself.
>>
No. 38139 ID: 43d730

>>38135
Done and done.
>>
No. 38167 ID: 19a31e

Claymores can't kill unarmored people well? How come?
>>
No. 38183 ID: 8a9d2e

>>38167
They're big and heavy, and thus slow. They still kill people well, just not as effectively as a faster weapon.
>>
No. 38409 ID: 249213

>>38123
Japanese smiths spend years working on a single katana and fold it up to a million times to produce the finest blades known to mankind.

Katanas are thrice as sharp as European swords and thrice as hard for that matter too. Anything a longsword can cut through, a katana can cut through better. I'm pretty sure a katana could easily bisect a knight wearing full plate with a simple vertical slash.

Ever wonder why medieval Europe never bothered conquering Japan? That's right, they were too scared to fight the disciplined Samurai and their katanas of destruction. Even in World War II, American soldiers targeted the men with the katanas first because their killing power was feared and respected.

So what am I saying? Katanas are simply the best sword that the world has ever seen, and thus, require better representation on the quest board
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