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File 168390331329.png - (16.61KB , 500x500 , luncha_questo_3.png )
1063589 No. 1063589 ID: 8d318c

I fight for honor, justice, and revenge!
And remember: mask up! A Luchadora never removes her mask.

Written by Donut
Art by Poltergeist Ethanoic Acid: https://questden.org/wiki/Poltergeist_Ethanoic_Acid
Expand all images
No. 1063590 ID: 8d318c
File 168390334275.png - (53.96KB , 1000x1000 , 001.png )

The librarian asks if I would rather sit in a chair. I say no.

In order to understand Lucha Libre Americana, I must understand the table. I must feel how its two halves become one. I must seek to understand the subtle intricacies of its mechanisms, where it is strong and where it is weak.

Also I really need to lie down right now because walking is a hassle.

The doctors say I can go around like normal with a cast on, and even wrestle as my injury heals. They have given me a very clear instruction, however, that I am not to use aerial moves until the cast comes off. A Luchadora with no aerials? That’s like a rabbit with no ears! I’ll have to rely on my holds and quick grabs to win tomorrow’s Evening Gown Match against Tsuki.

The thought of it fills my stomach with butterflies. Butterflies with wings of white-hot rage, that is. I am not nervous. No, I am not. I will smash that white rabbit’s porcelain pride and put her in her place!
No. 1063591 ID: 8d318c
File 168390338389.png - (49.65KB , 1000x1000 , 002.png )

Clearly, I can’t rely on Coco to translate for me. I’ve successfully kept this match a secret from Coco. SHE MUST NEVER KNOW: that would be un desastre monstruoso. I need to rely on my own command of the English language.

It is not good.

I wish I could take a class at the community college near where I live, but my wrestling schedule makes that impossible. The best I can do is check out books and try to engage in conversations with the students around my age. Unfortunately for me, the sporty things like running, gymnastics and yoga are things I cannot do right now… meaning if I’m going to practice my English, I’ll need to do it inside and use my smarts a lot more than I’m used to.

The more difficult the conversations, the more likely it is I’ll be too drained to FIGHT EVIL if it rears its ugly head.

The clubs meeting today are:

1. Art Club. Difficulty: Easy. The art club needs a model. I don’t have to talk too much if I don’t want to, and they’ll be grateful to have such a flexible model.
2. Book and Poetry Club. Difficulty: Moderate. I can read along with the discussion, and they’ll help me practice my pronunciation.
3. Tabletop Gaming Club. Difficulty: Hard. There are few printed guides I’ll understand, and the gamers will be talking fast and using improv.
4. Debate Club. Difficulty: IMPOSSIBLE. For those with fiery blood! I’m not sure how much English I’ll actually learn, but I’ll get a chance to see PASSION!
No. 1063594 ID: e51896

Not only will it help with pronounciation, it will also help you actually read some english. Then you can read the silly signs fans bring to OWO wrestling
No. 1063603 ID: d5170c

3. Wrestling is on the spot action and events, you will need to sharpen up your skills with promos that that unexpectedly happen.
No. 1063610 ID: 87e33c

2 would probably be your best bet to actually learn and get better, and maybe learn poetry to wax poetic on your foes in the ring

You should do 3 only if you pick a really easy class/game to play and you think the vibe of the room will be patient

1 may try to get you to take off your mask so it's a hard pass/fail

4 is probably what you want to do due to passion, but I would reccomend against

That being said I vote 2 if you want to be practical, 3 if you want it to be funny but still managable
No. 1063614 ID: 20cba0

Tabletop club. Dios mio, do not touch debate club with a ten-foot pole.
No. 1063635 ID: 520a3f

3. Tabletop Club would be hard to technically keep up with, but it dovetails with what type of work you'll need to do in wrestling- think off the cuff, read body language, and get who you are across quickly using both words and gestures. Knowing how to say a lot with few words in wrestling is important, and a GOOD tabletop group will help with that.

Keyword being good, of course.
No. 1063648 ID: 3b86e0


Your english is well above what most non natives ever get. You are good at listening, and can figure out new words from context. You've got the brawn AND the wits.

Onward! Onward to knowledge!
No. 1063703 ID: e5784e
File 168400825443.png - (38.35KB , 1000x828 , 003.png )

No soy un gallina- I mean, I am not a coward. I will face the challenge of improvisation! I would like to be able to understand most of what is said, though, so debate club will have to wait until I can keep up with their pace.

I recognize the leader of the Tabletop Gaming Club making notes on a table near mine. He must be plotting his diabolical traps and schemes. If he was in a wrestling promotion, he would be the boss. I will show no fear. I will not be bossed around! I grab my crutch and hop off my folding table with CONFIDENCE.

“Hello,” I say, in what is clearly English and not Spanish. “I will play with you.”

“Gah!” the leader jolts in his seat. “Uh. What?”

¡Qué lástima! My English has failed me. I have to try again.

“Pues… I would like to join your group for the day,” I say, more carefully this time.

“I mean… sure, we’re always looking for more players,” he says. He tells me his name is… Felipe? I didn’t quite catch it.

“I call myself Ignacia,” I say. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Felipe.”

“Close enough,” he shrugs. “If this is your first time playing Swords n’ Spells, there are few books over on that shelf with the rules. Look for the big books with “spells” on it, they really like to pump out splatbooks.”

“Splat… books?”

“It’s not important,” Felipe says. “Just grab as many as you want, and meet us in that room over there. We’ve got a good crew today! Oh. Um, do you want some help carrying them?”

“I do not need help,” I insist, and I grab all the spell books under one arm to prove that I am not afraid of getting splattered, and need no assistance because I am a strong Luchadora with great coordination even when injured and using a crutch because of an EVIL ninja bunny who I hate with A BURNING PASSION.

I join the assembling Tabletop Gaming Club. Felipe introduces me to Chestnut, the first player to show up.

“I love your mask!” Chestnut says. “You must really like your character to dress up as them.”

“I am my character,” I say simply.


Chestnut is playing a “bard” which when she describes it sounds a lot like some of the people I work with. Two more players will show up soon, and they’ll pick characters to fill out the party, so I can choose who I want to play as with no problems. Felipe says we can expect COMBAT!

What character should I play as?

1. A tough fighter, just like me! She knows all of her moves in English!
2. A wizened wizard with complete command of the English language and spells!
3. A holy cleric who can recite sermons and banish demons in perfect English!
4. A smooth-talking, English-slinging, acrobatic and dashing thief that steals from the rich and gives to the poor!
5. Suggest another English speaker! Maybe she isn’t as familiar with English as the above, but she’s trying!
No. 1063704 ID: e51896

1. fighter mainly, cause that's our main thing IRL, fighting!

but also consider
5. Barbarian (my second choice)
No. 1063705 ID: a7a180

A barbarian who doesn't actually speak the local language well, but they have studied long on the incredible journey from their homeland of, uh... Ximeco, and they are excited to show off what they have learned!
No. 1063706 ID: dee951

A smack-talking, charismatic monk, who uses a fighting style inspired by Capoeira, who doesn't let the orientation of their face get in the way of their insults (which are also timed with their kicks), which are delivered with perfect English diction!
No. 1063708 ID: e5709d

Wizard-Thief! Be as controversial as possible!
No. 1063798 ID: 03a81a

Yes, a monk!
A Dominican specifically, they were one of the few literate people in the middle ages and you are no a mission to bring books you transcribed by hand to the Vatican.
The others have to escort you.
No. 1063799 ID: dee951


You know 'person who meditates or prays a lot', and 'person who enjoys brewing beer', and 'person who transcribes religious texts' and 'person who practices martial arts' and 'person who dresses in funny robes' and 'person who speaks cryptically' are not at all mutually exclusive. Mix East and West tropes for 'monks'! Be cosmopolitan in your mysticism!
No. 1063802 ID: d5170c

Monk Monkey name Monk.
No. 1064156 ID: 6ad04b
File 168454892177.png - (197.44KB , 1000x1000 , 004.png )

I choose to play a wizened monk of intense devotion named ¡Sabia! She is well educated in the ways of words and whoop-ass.

Felipe lays out an intimidating pile of charts with numbers and many unfamiliar words, most of which don’t have vowels. I realize that these are abbreviations, not full words, and my heart sinks. I’m not going to be able to understand these papers at all!

“Do you know how this combat system works, Nacha?” Felipe asks.

“I am the fiercest monk in the land… but I am more familiar with, pues, Mexican rules.”

“I gotcha,” Chestnut smiles. “Okay, you said you were a monk, right? You want wisdom and dexterity. Here, just roll these dice, and add these numbers here when it’s a physical attack, and these when you want to chant a spell. Simple!”

“Why does this number have a line next to it? It’s my Charisma score. How do you say Charisma in Spanish?”

“The line means it’s a negative modifier,” Chestnut says, which is very confusing and I”m not sure it’s English. “That’s when people have trouble relating to you, or you have trouble expressing yourself.”

”Pendejo,” I mutter under my breath. “I don’t want Sabia to have any trouble expressing herself. She speaks perfect english!”

“You can put the penalty in intelligence instead. It’s no big deal. She can read from a few books to remember tough spells, it’s fine.”

“Thank you.” I say, hiding my Spanish-to-English dictionary under the table with a little sleight of hand.

The two latecomers to the group bring us up to a party of four, which means counting Felipe as leader we’re five. That’s one short of a proper Lucha Libre match, but no club is perfect. I practice my English introductions with them, and Chestnut gives me a nod of encouragement, even though I don’t need her approval.

Felipe gives me my instructions for the setting. The three Amigos from last play session have been tasked with escorting a wisecracking ass-kicking monk (that’s me!) through a dangerous pass. I have many powerful spellbooks I’m protecting, and I’m the only one who can read them. I have to constantly reference them because they’re so important! Yeah! I make a big show of pulling out a “spellbook” I pulled from the library, in which I’ve hidden my dictionary oh-so-cleverly. It’s a really old book with mystical symbols and pentagrams and stuff on the cover I found next to all the “demon splatbooks,” and everyone looks very impressed by my prop.

We adventure out into the wilderness and are immediately beset upon by ¡Banditos!

“Sabia, we need your help!” Chestnut’s bard character says. Oh! I’m in character now. I’ve prepared for this moment. Just pretend I’m in a promo.

Promo Practice! What does Sabia do?

1. Give a speech about how the forces of righteousness will always win! (In English, of course.)
2. Intimidate them with a ferocious acrobatic display! (Will require a roll, which might fail)
3. Cast a spooky spell in YE OLDE ENGLISH from my “spellbook” I got from the Library! Great for practicing tough words, and no one will care about the pronunciation.
4. All of the above!
5. Dos of the above! (pick two choices from 1-3)
No. 1064163 ID: a7a180

5 = 2 + 3.
No. 1064183 ID: eb494d

I'm gonna go with 3.
Give us some 6th century English, girl!
No. 1064254 ID: e51896

No. 1064304 ID: ba93b2

1. It's the most practical form of practice. Even if it's not absolutely perfect, practicing giving rousing speeches will help you most with putting together language, and also help you out winning the crowds in the ring!

Why not both? Don't ask too much at once. Enthusiasm is good, but you'll trip over yourself if you let it carry you away.
No. 1064305 ID: dee951

No. 1064313 ID: 20eb82

No. 1064321 ID: eb494d

And do unleash a flying kicks, along with a good ol' chest-punching.
No. 1064370 ID: a0ec34

rolled 10 + 2 = 12

Rolling for acrobatics!
No. 1064524 ID: cc8588
File 168499024625.png - (54.66KB , 1000x1000 , 005.png )

If I’m in character, that means I need to get fired up like Sabia. She speaks fluent English, and doesn’t worry about stumbling over her words. She’s got brains AND brawn. There’s nothing she can’t do, as long as she believes in herself!

“Sabia leaps into the fight!” I declare, rolling the die Felipe points at. It lands on doce. “Twelve!”

“You knock the first bandit senseless,” Felipe says. “The bunny bandit leader is surprised that the monk carrying holy symbols and spellbooks is so strong! She deems you worthy of her attention.”

“Did you say she was a bunny?” I ask, eyes narrowing. “¡¿Una bandida de conejito!?[/i]”

The universe is mocking me. Evil bunnies lurk around every corner. Tsuki’s mocking laugh rings in my ears. Silence, bunny! You’re making me talk in Spanish! I am here for English only!

“Uh… did I say something wrong?” Felipe asks.

“No,” I reply. “It is perfect. I… ah, Sabia challenges her to a fight! One on one, here in the ring! There is no need for anyone else to get hurt. The forces of good will triumph tomorrow night, and you can buy a ticket for the low, low price of eight dollars. I mean, ah, that’s how much your carriage ride to the hospital will cost! Because I’m about to cast my most powerful spell to chop you into sushi!”

“Sushi?” Chestnut asks. Felipe shrugs.

I’m angry and flustered at how that came out, but it was genuine, and I recovered from my slip of the tongue. My mind is on a certain other rabbit right now. I grab my “spellbook” and turn pages full of weird symbols and strange runes until I see something I recognize: a page labeled REVENGE.

All these words are weird and don’t roll their r’s where they should, but I remember that Sabia would have no problem with the pronunciation. I think of my most hated enemy and let my burning need for payback carry me through!

“Blue Moon, Saint Bernardus, Oberon’s Bells! Ye spirits, hear mine call! Winds howl, dogges growl! Tooth and fang, bloody clang! I summon the strength of the devouring beast to bring doom and despair upon mine enemy, until its blows make feast for carrion crows!”

The wind kicks up and the lights in the library clubroom flickers. A chill runs down my spine.

“That was hard CORE,” Chestnut says. “Did you make all that up?”

“I was just reading from your splat book,” I say sheepishly.

“That’s not a splatbook,” Felipe says. “I’ve never seen a book like that anywhere, much less one for our ruleset. Hey, can you hand it to me so I can-”
No. 1064525 ID: cc8588
File 168499025904.png - (15.45KB , 1000x1000 , 006.png )

The lights go out. Even the sunlight from the single, solidary clubroom window darkens as clouds roll in.

“Um…” one of the other players says. “Maybe the lights will come back on soon?”

The power doesn’t come back on.

What do we do?
1. Keep playing, we don’t need electricity to have fun!
2. Call it quits for now
3. Freak out over my newfound supernatural powers
No. 1064527 ID: e51896

I'm not sure which is funnier, going on like nothing happened, or freaking out like a dork.

ehhhh, 3. As long as our freakout doesn't end the game early.
No. 1064529 ID: e5709d

3) Freak out because registered superheroes cannot be Luchadores under recently legislated federal laws.
No. 1064531 ID: a7a180

No. 1064532 ID: 755f26

Nah, light on some candles and keep playing. It's all good. Mistakes were made but life goes on.
No. 1064538 ID: 8f9bc4

Do what any true gamer would do. Attack the darkness!
No. 1064586 ID: d5170c

3. Your new wizard powers will come in handy for defeating Tsuki

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