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File 167582721107.png - (15.85KB , 500x500 , title.png )
1055459 No. 1055459 ID: 15a025

DO NOT FILE!
Expand all images
>>
No. 1055460 ID: 15a025
File 167582723214.png - (61.35KB , 500x500 , 1.png )
1055460

Secretary: "Alright listen up. I am under very strict orders to keep this file on my person at all times. I am to under no circumstances let anyone access its contents."

Secretary: "However, due to my strong work ethic I tend to lose focus on...small, menial tasks. Therefore, as my assistant. I need you help remind me not to file this away. Not to open it. And most importantly, make sure it does not leave my desk!"

Secretary: "Do you understand me!"
>>
No. 1055461 ID: 15a025
File 167582724716.png - (62.46KB , 500x500 , 2.png )
1055461

*Loud keyboard noises*
>>
No. 1055462 ID: e7c7d3

So what is it you do here?
>>
No. 1055464 ID: b57fea

"Uhm... mam... please don't forget to not forget about that file and what not to do with it."
>>
No. 1055465 ID: be2ac4

Yes ma'am!
>>
No. 1055477 ID: e51896

Sh, no talky people, she's gotta concentrate on her work.
>>
No. 1055481 ID: a7a180

Your desk is messy, you should clean it up.
>>
No. 1055486 ID: 908530

You should put a paperweight on the folder so that it doesn't get blown away by a stray gust of wind.
>>
No. 1055499 ID: 8850b5

Put file under pen cup to stop her from grabbing it.
>>
No. 1055503 ID: f7bc7b

So what do we do here again?
>>
No. 1055504 ID: 68f7c5

Can you really call an unfiled file a file?
>>
No. 1055506 ID: 5560d0

Yes ma'am!

Take pride in your position as assistant to the employee of the month.
>>
No. 1055508 ID: 322af8

Go get coffee.
>>
No. 1055515 ID: e5709d

Literally tape file to desk.
Problem solved.
>>
No. 1055543 ID: 9a2966

>>1055515
Only if the secretary notices the slight tug of resistance as she picks up the file.

But the noise of it should alert us and then we can remind her that in this one case for this one file her well-honed reflexes and rigorous work ethic is bad and wrong.
>>
No. 1055550 ID: bbb04b

>>1055515
Yeah, honestly, taking measures to add steps to the process of filing this file is the best preventative measure we can take to ensure she has enough time to notice (and for us to have enough time to react) if she goes for it.

Maybe tape is a bit extreme, though; or at least, it has a chance of damaging the file if she tugs at it. There are safer ways to ensure that, such as...

"Hey, maybe we should clamp a corner or two of the file under some stuff, just so there's extra steps if you or someone else gets the urge to pick it up? Like, say, wedging it partway under your computer?"
>>
No. 1055562 ID: 9bcdf5

if you dont wnat anybody to access the contents, just eat it.
>>
No. 1055564 ID: f3eb4a

Seduce the secretary

She will be so entranced by your wiles, she will never think of wrongfully filling the file.
>>
No. 1055582 ID: 15a025
File 167590694622.png - (62.46KB , 500x500 , 3.png )
1055582

>Literally tape file to desk.
>taking measures to add steps to the process of filing this file is the best preventative measure we can take to ensure she has enough time to notice
Secretary: "Not happening. Do you realize how unprofessional it'd look if I had a file taped onto my desk."

>You should put a paperweight on the folder so that it doesn't get blown away by a stray gust of wind.
>Put file under pen cup to stop her from grabbing it.
Without even looking, she places the cup of pens on the folder. Then she gets back to quickly typing.

>So what is it you do here?
>So what do we do here again?
Secretary: "Just about everything. File papers, write up reports, do our taxes, answer phone calls, just about anything I can do for the company. Including not filing this folder away."

>Your desk is messy, you should clean it up.
Secretary: "Hm, I suppose it is a little cluttered. Would you be a dear and fetch me some morning coffee while I clear it off?"
>>
No. 1055583 ID: 15a025
File 167590695938.png - (15.96KB , 500x500 , 4.png )
1055583

You walk over to the corner acquire a cup of hot coffee.
>>
No. 1055584 ID: 15a025
File 167590701433.png - (57.67KB , 500x500 , 5.png )
1055584

Secretary: "Just set down somewhere on my desk, I need to finish typing up this email real quick."

She continues to type pretty loudly.
>>
No. 1055585 ID: 2aa5f0

huh, so where did you put everything on your desk?
>>
No. 1055587 ID: 070788

>>1055584
You fool! Where did you put that file that you weren't supposed to touch?!
>>
No. 1055593 ID: bbb04b

"Um, where's the file? Where's the pen-cup, for that matter!" Glance around! They couldn't have gone far! "We literally turned around for five seconds!"
>>
No. 1055596 ID: f4c383

We had one job. ONE... JOB!
yeah, where is it?
>>
No. 1055615 ID: b57fea

Grab her by the shoulders and shake her, yell "WHERE'S THE FILE!?!?!"
>>
No. 1055617 ID: a7a180

Here's your coffee, and remember not to file anything!
>>
No. 1055623 ID: 322af8

Ask her if she is sitting on the file.
>>
No. 1055661 ID: 15a025
File 167599615456.png - (62.21KB , 500x500 , 6.png )
1055661

>huh, so where did you put everything on your desk?
>"Um, where's the file? Where's the pen-cup, for that matter!"
Secretary: "Just- just one more second...and...send."

Secretary: "What was that now? I thought you asked me to clean off my desk."

>You fool! Where did you put that file that you weren't supposed to touch?!
Secretary: "Oh right. I just shoved it in my desk for a moment."

She sets it back on the desk, and places a cup full of suckers on top it.

Secretary: "There, back in sight. Now, my coffee please."
>>
No. 1055662 ID: 15a025
File 167599618793.png - (62.09KB , 500x500 , 7.png )
1055662

You hand her the cup of coffee, and ask how that doesn't count as filing the folder away?

Secretary: "No my dear. Filing it away would be putting it in the archives. As long as it stays with me, we're in the clear."
>>
No. 1055663 ID: 15a025
File 167599620858.png - (62.15KB , 500x500 , 8.png )
1055663

Suddenly someone comes in and drops a big pile of folders on her desk.

Office Worker: "Hey, we're clearing out the archives. I need you to shred all these folders on your desk."
>>
No. 1055664 ID: bbb04b

"Maybe start by putting the file back in your desk before you start shredding all that."
>>
No. 1055665 ID: a7a180

Remember, don't file anything! It all has to go in the shredder. Not in a drawer under your desk.
>>
No. 1055666 ID: e5709d

Oh great. We'll shred these, you physically hold on to your Do Not File until we're done... *urk* carrying... *hup* these out!
>>
No. 1055667 ID: ccbbb0

Grab the file, which is now at the bottom of the pile, and ask if it wouldn't be funny if...

if the file did a little song.
"Ah do do do, a file." You know? Like an educational show.
>>
No. 1055668 ID: e51896

As long as you leave the file under the pen holder alone, theres no chance you'll shred it. That said, leave the file under the pen basket alone.
>>
No. 1055682 ID: 8850b5

Yesh, is someone from the top coming down to look at the offices or something and the local bosses are trying to tidy up to try and look better then they actually are?

Well at least the special file is still in under the pen holder cup
>>
No. 1055683 ID: 15c72a

>>1055663
Don't shred the file under the cup.
>>
No. 1055687 ID: 322af8

Back to work for us all then. Start shredding while only slightly reading whats in the to be destroyed files.
>>
No. 1055693 ID: 30b9f6

>>1055683
She's actively drinking from the cup, so she might move it and then forget.

Moving the file to a different area of the desk, away from the stack, where you can keep an eye on it, is probably the smart move.
>>
No. 1055962 ID: 15a025
File 167633612836.png - (62.07KB , 500x500 , 9.png )
1055962

>As long as you leave the file under the pen holder alone, theres no chance you'll shred it. That said, leave the file under the pen basket alone.
Secretary: "Right. It is absolutely not to leave my desk."

>Yesh, is someone from the top coming down to look at the offices or something and the local bosses are trying to tidy up to try and look better than they actually are?
Off screen office worker: "No no no. No. No of course not. See these are just old files for uh...clients or projects we no longer deal with. Certainly not any info that would make us look bad if it were seen or got out."

>Oh great. We'll shred these, you physically hold on to your Do Not File until we're done... *urk* carrying... *hup* these out!

Secretary: "Good! Thank you. While you shred those, I'll be sure to keep an eye on this file while you're gone."
>>
No. 1055963 ID: 15a025
File 167633616525.png - (12.86KB , 500x500 , 10.png )
1055963

You grunt and huff as you haul the heavy stack of folders, and make your way to the shredder. The room is dim and empty. Guess you're the first person to use this thing today?

>Back to work for us all then. Start shredding while only slightly reading whats in the to be destroyed files.
You start throwing folders into the shredder, while taking a quick peek at the labels. Most of them are just names of clients, or labeled "Client Order Forms", followed with a date.

Shuffled into the mix though, are some oddly labeled folders. "Funny cat pictures", "Newspaper comics", and even "Daily Crosswords."

Do you dare take a peek inside a folder?
>>
No. 1055966 ID: ac5319

Well... nothing is stamped confidential. And even the best shredders take a while. Glance through the folders while the other folders are shredding, make sure there aren't any staples or paper clips or those clippy thingies that are beyond the capacity of that particular shredder to handle.
>>
No. 1055967 ID: 15c72a

>>1055963
Sure. Let's see those funny cat pictures.
>>
No. 1055972 ID: 2aa5f0

peek real quick and see if anything catches your eye, then start shredding. also take small brakes to check in on the secretary to make sure she doesn't file the file before heading back to shred more papers.
>>
No. 1055976 ID: b256e4

Yeah, check them out. Just make sure you don't read any Heathcliff. He's bad news.
>>
No. 1055990 ID: ced468

Wait, double check and make sure its not the file we are not supposed to file before you take a peek. Triple check even.
>>
No. 1056099 ID: 7f2a90

Take the remaining stack and pop back into the office to make sure she hasn't filed the file, before you do anything else. Then head back to the shredder room and peek the weird files before shredding them. Then return.
>>
No. 1056100 ID: e5709d

Ooh, more Sudoku puzzles for my collection!
>>
No. 1056239 ID: 15a025
File 167651501991.png - (37.83KB , 500x500 , 11.png )
1056239

>Sure. Let's see those funny cat pictures.
>Yeah, check them out. Just make sure you don't read any Heathcliff. He's bad news.
You're probably safe from seeing Heathcliff in this folder, since it's labeled Funny cats. You open it up, and flip through the pictures. They're all pictures of cats wearing a ham helmet, with the caption, "He's waiting for Ham Day."

At the end of the folder is a note,
"To whoever keeps wasting space and folders in the archives on these nonsensical pictures. When I find you, I will personally eject you out into the recycling bin."

Yeesh. Guess it won't be Ham Day anytime soon.
Ah well, back to shredding.

You toss more files into the shredder, making sure to check that none of them are the Do Not File folder. Some of the other files you see are just labeled "Office Supplies", "Employees of the Month." Nothing really notable.
>>
No. 1056240 ID: 15a025
File 167651503422.png - (19.43KB , 500x500 , 12.png )
1056240

You hop back into the secretary's office once you're done.

Secretary: "Ah. I see you've finished shredding. I'm in a little bit of a pickle myself though. I can't check my emails, and the phone seems to be down. You wouldn't happen to be one of those computer experts would you? Or maybe you could track down one those computer guys to help me out?
>>
No. 1056243 ID: e5709d

...
*Takes off LotusVR headset*
>>
No. 1056245 ID: e44d5d

Where did the pen basket go? Was supposed to be on the do not file folder.

Anyways, our main job is to make sure you dont file that folder, and we cant do that job if we go on fetch quests. Maybe we should stay and help you figure out this computer problem so we can also keep an eye on that folder

Wait, i think those things we shredded were stuff that kept things running, like the employee of the month folder we shredded made that pic in the background a broken image, and that office supplies folder made the pen basket vanish.
>>
No. 1056251 ID: dee951

What happened to the employee of the month picture?
>>
No. 1056252 ID: dee951

Wait a minute! Some of the files you are shredding are impacting your local reality!

OH MY GOD YOU ARE IN THE MATRIX AND YOU ARE DELETING FILES RELEVANT TO YOUR CURRENT INSTANCE SPACE IN THAT SHREDDER!!
>>
No. 1056260 ID: e51896

For all we know, they probably accidentally had us shred the folders that made the phones and computer work. If thats the case, the higher ups should realize something is wrong and fix it soon enough, and the problem should resolve itself. Take a little rest until things fix itself.
>>
No. 1056261 ID: 322af8

Tell her that you are totally one of those computer guys and start looking at her computer. See if she has been looking into any nsfw sites in her history...yknow to see if thats why everything went down.
>>
No. 1056262 ID: 8850b5

Wait, were we shredding actual computer files?! How cheap is this place if it won’t get proper servers and just uses paper files for everything? People haven’t done that since the end of the Second World War!
>>
No. 1056263 ID: dee951

>>1056243

Agreed! Make movements as if you are taking off VR headsets or unplugging/unhooking things attached to your head, eyes, or neck!!
>>
No. 1056280 ID: b57fea

Sure you do a little bit of "Computer Science", you are something of a "tech genius"

Tell her to stand aside while you run the windows connection troubleshooter
>>
No. 1056283 ID: c25945

someone is trolling us, or we're being filmed on live tv for a prank show
>>
No. 1056284 ID: 15c72a

>>1056240
Have you tried turning it off and on again?
>>
No. 1056426 ID: bbb04b

>>1056262
Uh... I think it's a little more serious than that. I... I think those were digital files. Something behind the desk is... it's failing to load.

Maybe point at that and gawk silently until she turns around and notices the absolute reality-break happening behind her.
>>
No. 1056432 ID: dee951

>>1056283

Oh, good one. Say loudly, "I do not consent to be recorded or for my reactions or behavior to be posted online or otherwise shared."
>>
No. 1056434 ID: dee951

>>1056252
>>1056432

Here's some more if you are in some kind of vat in virtual reality or are a computer program or are a brain in a jar or something.

"Status. Menu. Options. I want to wake up now. End Scene. End Program. End Simulation. Command: Emergency Exit. Alright guys, ha-ha, you win, let me out now. Administrator Escalation. I revoke any previously granted permission or consent to modify or suppress my memory or perceptions of reality. Command Line: Help. Tilde. Safeword. Banana. Red Light. There's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place like home."
>>
No. 1056442 ID: 15c72a

That's probably just a digital image display. Network's down, so it can't display her photo.
>>
No. 1056444 ID: 74174f

>>1056442

She can check if it's a digital image display. Also, shouldn't it have a wire/plug?
>>
No. 1056608 ID: 15a025
File 167694363218.png - (19.27KB , 500x500 , 13.png )
1056608

>Have you tried turning it off and on again?
Secretary: "Huh, well it's worth a shot."

The computer makes a loud click, and the fans start to shut up. Then another click, and the fans start revving up again.

Secretary: "Nah, still no emails. Any other ideas?"
>Status. Menu. Options. I want to wake up now. End Scene. End Program.
>Make movements as if you are taking off VR headsets or unplugging/unhooking things attached to your head, eyes, or neck!!
Secretary: "You think we have the budget for voice controlled computers? Do those even exist? You're kinda losing me here."
>>
No. 1056609 ID: 15a025
File 167694366814.png - (13.45KB , 500x500 , 14.png )
1056609

> point at that and gawk silently until she turns around and notices the absolute reality-break happening behind her.
> What happened to the employee of the month picture?
Secretary: "What are you point- oh my stars!"

Secretary: "Someone took my employee of the month photo!"

Secretary: "No...oh no... what if, I'm being replaced! What if I'm not going to be employee of the month next month!"

>Where did the pen basket go? Was supposed to be on the do not file folder.
Secretary: "They're even taking my supplies!"

Secretary: "Wait a second, nobody came into my office though. They couldn't have just vanished, could they?"

>i think those things we shredded were stuff that kept things running
Secretary: "What do you mean by that? You didn't stick some cable or something into the shredder did you?"
>>
No. 1056610 ID: 15a025
File 167694368705.png - (15.97KB , 500x500 , 15.png )
1056610

There's a knock on the door, and a badger comes in.

Office Badger: "Uh hey. This is kinda embarrassing, but you wouldn't happen to have a pen would you? I'm just about to seal the deal on a massive client contract here, but I can't find anything to write with!"

Secretary: "Oh, that's quite a pickle. Assistant! Could you either help him find a pen, or watch that file and get the computer back up while I go look around?"
>>
No. 1056613 ID: a7a180

Use badger with shredder.
>>
No. 1056614 ID: b57fea

Okay nows our chance. Clearly there is something seriously spooky related to these files. Tell her you'll fix the computer then take the Do Not File file and look at it, we must learn its secrets. They could have the answers we need!
>>
No. 1056626 ID: 15c72a

Ah. Recycling bin, missing image after "shredding" files, "space in folders"... we're in a computer.
Don't look at the Do Not file. It's probably a virus. Though I guess it could be some kind of meta thing?

Let's find that pen. Maybe it fell on the floor? Meanwhile ask who the big contract is with.
>>
No. 1056650 ID: 322af8

Opt to watch the file and try to fix the computer. Let her look for the pen. Suggest you saw it over there on the floor so that she has to bend over...yknow so you can't look up her short skirt while she does.
>>
No. 1056660 ID: b256e4

See if there is a printer, and if there is, print a paper with pens written on it. Try at least a brand of pen, color, and quantity just in case it's specific
>>
No. 1056664 ID: e51896

Staying and watching the file and trying to fix the computer is my choice, that's like, our main job, to watch the file.

but whatever we do, let's tell her to talk with the person who gave her all those files to thread earlier, or find them ourself if we're not going to stay and watch the file.
>>
No. 1057154 ID: 15a025
File 167771920566.png - (152.33KB , 500x500 , 16.png )
1057154

>Opt to watch the file and try to fix the computer.
>Staying and watching the file and trying to fix the computer is my choice, that's like, our main job, to watch the file.

Secretary: "Alright nerd! Time to show off those skills then. I'm entrusting a lot of responsibility on you. And my reputation as employee of the month. Pleeeeaaase don't let me down!"

>tell her to talk with the person who gave her all those files to shred earlier.
Secretary: "Trying to tell me how to do my job now huh? I'd remind you who's employee of the month, but I think you get the point."

She pauses for a moment,
Secretary: "Oh alright, I guess I'll say something if I run into them."

You hop on the computer chair and slowly start to realize. You don't really recognize this operating system. Or who this uh... "Flint" is.
>>
No. 1057156 ID: 15c72a

>>1057154
Check recycle bin and New Folder. Try and find an antivirus, that New Application is sus as hell.
Don't open the do not open.
>>
No. 1057174 ID: dee951

>>1057154

Determine on a SAFE file what brings up a menu for detailed properties when you click on something. Command Click, Right Click, Alt click, whatever. Determine what information you can get from those menus, maybe a properties or a details option. Then do that with the do not open bit. Is it a web link? A folder? A link to an executable file of some sort? Is there an option to browse the directory where it goes?
>>
No. 1057195 ID: 322af8

Alright NOW we should go on the internet and see what nsfw sites she's been on.
>>
No. 1057217 ID: f8083d

For starters, reproduce the error: Double-click inbox and see what goes wrong.
>>
No. 1057228 ID: 52d403

Forget the repair job. Play some solitaire
>>
No. 1057263 ID: b57fea

>>1057228
Indeed!
>>
No. 1057279 ID: e51896

>>1057156
this then
>>1057217
this
>>
No. 1057700 ID: 15a025
File 167815506347.png - (118.82KB , 500x500 , 17.png )
1057700

>Determine on a SAFE file what brings up a menu for detailed properties when you click on something.
>Then do that with the do not open bit

You manage to find out how to bring up file properties, and attempt to inspect the do not open folder.
You can see two things about it
FILES IN FOLDER: 0
FILE SIZE ON DISK: 32 KB.

Something about that doesn't sound right.
>>
No. 1057702 ID: 15a025
File 167815509292.png - (127.25KB , 500x500 , 18.png )
1057702

>Check recycle bin
You open up the recycle bin. It just has documents titled "schedule for" followed by a date. Nothing too interesting.
Next you open up the new folder. Inside are a bunch of folders titled new folder1,2,3,4, and so on. I guess she doesn't know how to rename folders? Or maybe it's a way to confuse possible snoops?

>For starters, reproduce the error: Double-click inbox and see what goes wrong.
You double click the inbox and an error pops up.
The application you are trying to open is either unavailable at this time or cannot be found. Please contact your administrator for more information.

Another message pop ups on screen:
"Do not reply, as a reminder. Instant messages like this cost us per message sent and is used only for emergency notices such as this. Phone lines are currently down and something is wrong with our emails. Be on the lookout for any suspicious activity or individual. We believe someone is stealing all of our office supplies. Please knock on the supply closet and let our IT department know if you find anything. That is all."
>>
No. 1057707 ID: 15c72a

Open mozzarilla and check browsing history.
Check file properties on that New Application. When was it created?
>>
No. 1057726 ID: dee951

>>1057700

Yea, some settings somewhere allows for hidden files. Try opening New Folder and see if you can edit the folder view settings, and navigate to view the desktop with the program used to view folders, enabling showing the file extension options and showing all hidden filetypes and all those power user type settings that give more information or options or show advanced menus or whatever. That will help inform whether you can do something with the 'do not open'. I suppose it would depend on what kind of extra detail you can figure out!
>>
No. 1057753 ID: e51896

how is the file that isn't supposed to be filed doing on our desk?
>>
No. 1057809 ID: b57fea

>>1057707
This, but also. I feel like opening the Do Not File is critical. Afterall its "do not file" not "do not open". Crack it open!
>>
No. 1057898 ID: 52d403

Oh well. Play some solitaire.
>>
No. 1057909 ID: ef829b

>>1057809

We were told at the start not to open it though
>>
No. 1057914 ID: a7e32a

If this is some kind of computer simulation, we definitely should not open the file. It might be a zip bomb or a virus.
>>
No. 1057999 ID: dee951

>>1057909

And that was before everything started getting super wonky. Also, no one reasonable would expect someone not to peek given those instructions. This entire business and experience is completely out of control!
>>
No. 1058582 ID: 15a025
File 167884625653.png - (13.81KB , 500x500 , 19.png )
1058582

>how is the file that isn't supposed to be filed doing on our desk?
Still there, thankfully. You can see why the secretary needed an assistant for this, the computer can sure be distracting.
>>
No. 1058584 ID: 15a025
File 167884627512.png - (118.76KB , 500x500 , 20.png )
1058584

>Check file properties on that New Application. When was it created?
You try to check the creation date for it, but seems like it's just blank? Hopefully nothing's wrong with the computer.
>>
No. 1058585 ID: 15a025
File 167884630563.png - (121.48KB , 500x500 , 21.png )
1058585

>see if you can edit the folder view settings, and navigate to view the desktop with the program used to view folders, enabling showing the file extension options and showing all hidden filetypes and all those power user type settings
Odd. You don't have permission to see file extensions, but it lets you enable hidden files.
Out of curiosity, you check the DO NOT OPEN folder.

It's changed?
>>
No. 1058592 ID: 273c18

Oh neat Minesweeper is on the desktop. Why is it hidden though? Try running it.

Also, now that you can examine folders for their contents, snoop in New Folder, using Properties to see which of the subfolders contain files.
>>
No. 1058650 ID: 52d403

Play minesweeper
>>
No. 1058673 ID: dee951

Open New Folder and use that to manually type in the path to do not open so you can browse to where you can see the hidden file in the do not open folder without going there normally.
>>
No. 1058733 ID: 15a025
File 167900973106.png - (110.48KB , 500x500 , 22.png )
1058733

>Oh neat Minesweeper is on the desktop. Why is it hidden though? Try running it.
>Play minesweeper
Odd that is was hidden, but you suppose a short break here couldn't hurt. You double click the icon and the game board pops up.
>>
No. 1058734 ID: 15a025
File 167900974760.png - (111.93KB , 500x500 , 23.png )
1058734

You aren't very good at it though, and shortly click a mine-
>>
No. 1058736 ID: 15a025
File 167900978549.png - (19.75KB , 500x500 , 24.png )
1058736

*BOOM*

You hear a few screams of panic as the secretary's door spontaneously explodes. Thankfully, it doesn't seem like anyone but the door was hurt.
>>
No. 1058737 ID: b57fea

>>1058673
Oooh this is a good idea.

>>1058736
Also holy shit move quickly! Whatever is on the computer is influencing reality! Start downloading pictures of money and printing them! This is of the utmost urgency! If the net is down use MSPAINT!
>>
No. 1058738 ID: 6729e7

NOW do you believe you're in a simulation?? Or possibly the afterlife?? Or some mad scientist's artificially set up world??
>>
No. 1058739 ID: b57fea

>>1058737
Oh, in addition, try adding a bunch of files to do not open and see if the do not file gets bulkier!
>>
No. 1058744 ID: 6729e7

More precisely, consider that you may be literally in Hell. In other words, either a supernatural demon is messing with your local reality in malicious manner, or it is actually hundreds of years into The Future, and an evil AI has copied your brain onto a smaller computer somewhere, and is running you and your coworkers in a simulated Hell and making you think that the present is actually the present. Now realize that there is, to your viewpoint, NO OBSERVABLE DIFFERENCE between the two scenarios from the inside.
>>
No. 1058746 ID: a7a180

What happens when you win Solitaire, then? Try that next.
>>
No. 1058754 ID: e5709d

We can number crunch so much shit if we only knew how to apply the computer's base programs to unanswered fundamental problems like [P:NP]

Start off by attempting to code a basic .js script and use a browser to play it. Use the command browser to find 'spells' and throw them into the code.
>>
No. 1058834 ID: 52d403

Maybe you should not being bad at minesweeper dude.
>>
No. 1059035 ID: 11dc21

>>1058754
this... isn't actually a bad idea
see if you can use javascript to summon your hunky original the character to real life
>>
No. 1059036 ID: dee951

Ya this is like that sci fi/fantasy book where the protagonist realized he was a computer program in a simulated world, and then figured out how to get access to some of the code of his simulation, and used his coding skills to cast spells on his reality.

See if you can do that without getting yourself or others horribly killed!
>>
No. 1059372 ID: 15a025
File 167961516529.png - (129.92KB , 500x500 , 25.png )
1059372

>NOW do you believe you're in a simulation?? Or possibly the afterlife?? Or some mad scientist's artificially set up world??
Okay, there might be some kind of magic or crazy sci-fi thing going in the office. Door's don't just suddenly blow up after all.

>Whatever is on the computer is influencing reality! Start downloading pictures of money and printing them!
Well, it's a worth a shot. Hopefully this won't cause any economic problems or collapse. You try to print out some pictures of money, however an error pops up.
ERROR: This program has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down. A note will be added to your file about this.
So much for free money...
>>
No. 1059373 ID: 15a025
File 167961519549.png - (168.49KB , 500x500 , 26.png )
1059373

>see if you can use javascript to summon your hunky original the character to real life
Unfortunately, you have no idea how to code or program. That's beyond your pay grade.

>print a paper with pens written on it. Try at least a brand of pen, color, and quantity just in case it's specific
Well, if you can't print out money. Maybe you can print office supplies? You try typing up a document with all kinds of ways to describe pens. You print it out, but nothing happens. Then you try printing out pictures of pens, but alas. Still nothing.
You try to think. Maybe there's something else you have to do with these files for the office magic to work?
>>
No. 1059376 ID: a7e32a

I don't think printing will do anything. I think it has to be a file on the computer. Try saving a photo of some office supplies to the computer!

You wouldn't download a car!
>>
No. 1059378 ID: b57fea

>>1059376 This!
Its so obvious! Download A CAR!
>>
No. 1059383 ID: dee951

Ya, save it to the desktop, then close and then run the file by double clicking it from the desktop. Try various sorts of files types, text, images, and the like. Also, the office equipment around you was influencing reality, maybe you can do something with that??
>>
No. 1059645 ID: 52d403

Maybe you gotta do the opposite of shredding files? Double check the room just to make sure printing didn't do anything
>>
No. 1059646 ID: e4595e

Ya, can you restore things, get them out of trash or recycle bins, stop destroying things, put things back in their place, both digitally and in 'reality'?
>>
No. 1059858 ID: 15a025
File 168013983345.png - (131.04KB , 500x500 , 27.png )
1059858

>You wouldn't download a car!
>It's so obvious! Download A CAR!
You wouldn't download a car, the company's internet speed is only 64 kb/s. You'll be clocked out for the night before it even gets half way there.

>Try saving a photo of some office supplies to the computer!
>Try various sorts of files types, text, images, and the like.
You save your little collage of office supplies as a jpig onto the desktop. Then you also make a notepad file as well. Still no luck.

>try adding a bunch of files to do not open and see if the do not file gets bulkier!
You try putting your office supply files into the Do Not Open folder, and get met with an error:
(X) : File is read only for this user.
>>
No. 1059859 ID: 15a025
File 168013984756.png - (39.48KB , 500x500 , 28.png )
1059859

>Ya, can you restore things, get them out of trash or recycle bins, stop destroying things, put things back in their place, both digitally and in 'reality'?
You don't think you can hit the undo button and un-shred a folder. Maybe the files have to be on both the computer and in the office? You grab an empty folder and put the office supply papers in it.
>>
No. 1059860 ID: 15a025
File 168013986143.png - (19.29KB , 500x500 , 29.png )
1059860

Neat!
>>
No. 1059861 ID: e5709d

Create a folder titled "Fluffy Mascot" and stuff it with a combination of curated lewds, standard textbooks, and some random stuff.
>>
No. 1059862 ID: dee951

So... you can now print out pictures of arbitrary things, label a folder appropriately, place the picture in the folder, and then HAVE THE THING IN FRONT OF YOU.

You... have the ability to summon... literally anything!

See if it's limited to things that 'should' be at an office, or if it's other, arbitrary things too! Can you get sci fi and fantasy things? Will they work?!?!

BREAK THE ECONOMY GET A BUNCH OF SUPER TECH, TOOLS, JEWELS, MAGICAL ITEMS, THE MOST AMAZING CLOTHES, IMPOSSIBLE THINGS, MAGICAL COMPANIONS, LET YOUR INNER 12 YEAR OLD FREEEE YOU CAN HAVE AAANNYYYTHIIINGGG!!!!
>>
No. 1059863 ID: dee951

To start with, try things like:

-Money/Gems/Platinum Bars
-Extreme high end office chair
-Survival Kit/Bug Out Bag
-Peak Physical and Mental Prowess Fast-Acting Super-Serum
-Sci Fi energy blaster with a stun setting
-Immortality Potion
-Magical Skill-Granting Book (start with something innocuous, like for gardening, and if that works, start ramping it up to every skill you ever wanted)
>>
No. 1059865 ID: dee951

>>1059863

Something to enable you to fly with complete control! A ring of flying, perhaps! And a ring of invisibility! But not the over the top evil types, just the basic ones.
>>
No. 1059868 ID: 79582c

Don't get too crazy with materializing things into your office immediately. Start with something simple, like porn.
>>
No. 1059872 ID: dee951

>>1059868

What happens if that materializes, you know, the character of a porn star? Not the actor, the actual over the top character they're playing as?
>>
No. 1059903 ID: 52d403

Make a new door before everyone finds out you sucked at mainsweeper
>>
No. 1059904 ID: 783f41

>>1059903

Would that make an appropriately installed door, or just summon the materials? Or would you need some sort of sci fi repair beam or magical repair device?
>>
No. 1061050 ID: 15a025
File 168106783677.png - (11.10KB , 500x500 , 30.png )
1061050

>Print money, break economy.
You already tried printing money, the computer yelled at you for that.

>Start with something simple, like porn.
You can't up that stuff at work. Those kinds of websites are blocked.

>[Print magical items]
You try printing and stuffing papers with magical items on them. From magical flying rings, magical spell books, to even a potion of immortality. All you get though is a cheap plastic ring a children's book on how to read and spell. You don't even get a potion or any kind of drink. How lame.
>>
No. 1061051 ID: 15a025
File 168106786193.png - (41.75KB , 500x500 , 31.png )
1061051

>Make a new door before everyone finds out you sucked at mainsweeper
>Would that make an appropriately installed door, or just summon the materials? Or would you need some sort of sci fi repair beam or magical repair device?

Well, maybe that's enough goofing around. You print out a door and throw it's paper into a folder. A new door takes the place of the old one!
Something about it doesn't seem right though? It's on the tip of your tongue, but it's like a sneeze that just won't come out.
>>
No. 1061057 ID: dee951

>>1061051

Well, it's the wrong type of door for the purpose. But let's be honest here -- is anyone at THIS place actually going to care? And if they do, will they care enough to make a fuss??
>>
No. 1061066 ID: 273c18

It's Too Realistic. Just like the employee of the month picture... I think we should find out where the picture came from.
>>
No. 1061090 ID: dee951

>>1061066

That too. Different detail levels applied to the different assets of the simulation, perhaps? And you have a cognitive block from easily noticing the difference unless you focus on it and know to look for it? The cat layer of the he's waiting for ham day picture was similar.
>>
No. 1061091 ID: e51896

shoulda used microsoft paint for the door. Ah well, a door's a door.
>>
No. 1061171 ID: 15a025
File 168124790024.png - (44.01KB , 500x500 , 32.png )
1061171

>It's Too Realistic. Just like the employee of the month picture... I think we should find out where the picture came from.
Too realistic? How can a tangible object in front of you be too realistic. You try to recall what the employee of the month photo looked like, but can't draw a clear image of it in your mind.

>you have a cognitive block from easily noticing the difference unless you focus on it and know to look for it?
You stare really, really hard at the door. Maybe it's because it's not the same color of the wall? Yeah. It's gotta be the weird color of the door.

The door opens and the secretary comes back in.

Secretary: "Ugh, I wasted all that time with the badger looking for a pen. How did neither of us see the cup of pens just sitting on his desk!"

She looks around the office.

Secretary: "You been going through my stuff while I was gone? I could have sworn I cleared off my desk before I left."
>>
No. 1061172 ID: 15a025
File 168124794372.png - (29.32KB , 500x500 , 33.png )
1061172

She sits back down at her desk.

Secretary: "Still no emails though hm... Guess these have to be delivered on hoof then."

She prints out a few flyers and hoof's them over to you.

Secretary: "These are invites for a special investor celebration. All the big project leads are getting together for a pizza party, with a secret reveal."

Secretary: "Oh! Make sure none of the regular employee's know about it as well. They're not invited."

She scuttles you out there door.

Secretary: "Now do be quick! I'll have more for you to do when you get back."

You have three invites, with no names or other instructions. Who's office or department are you going to wander into first?
>>
No. 1061173 ID: 7b161e

Perhaps HR for an orgchart to figure out who the 'big project leads' are?
>>
No. 1061213 ID: b256e4

She didn't even give you the names of the 3 people who get the invites? Try going back in and just asking, or ask where their offices are.
>>
No. 1061242 ID: 52d403

Pass out two, and keep the last for yourself. Can't turn down free pizza
>>
No. 1061243 ID: e51896

>Perhaps HR for an orgchart to figure out who the 'big project leads' are?

this. don't let HR know about pizza party either. We'll think up an excuse later if they ask why. don't keep one for yourself.
>>
No. 1061398 ID: 96112b

Go out the door and say "super duper investor pizza party! Bring extra pizzas to participate! If you don't invest in the party, we kick you out, thanks!"
>>
No. 1061574 ID: 15a025
File 168173093747.png - (21.79KB , 500x500 , 34.png )
1061574

>Perhaps HR for an orgchart to figure out who the 'big project leads' are?
>don't let HR know about pizza party either. We'll think up an excuse later if they ask why. don't keep one for yourself.
At least you know your way over there! You walk over to the helpful resources office.

HR Manager: "Ah! You're the secretary's new assistant. How's your first day going?"

You just smile and tell them things are going well. You explain you're trying to find who these "big project leads" are. There's some paper's for them, since the emails are down.

HR Manager: "Ah, that might be an issue. Nobody's really suppose to go in their offices unless it's important. What is it you're bringing to them?"
>>
No. 1061575 ID: 273c18

>>1061574
It's a secret, sorry.
>>
No. 1061576 ID: dee951

Sorry, you don't have a direct business need to know that and I was told that the information is sensitive.
>>
No. 1061581 ID: fa9b43

Well, put the fliers in three seperate envelopes, and ask if there is somewhere like a drop box that you can drop the fliers off to the higher ups.
>>
No. 1061658 ID: 322af8

Ask her about her leave it to beaver poster. Pretend you don't know what a beaver is and ask if you can see her beaver.
>>
No. 1061662 ID: dee951

>>1061658

Do you want to get fired for sexual harassment??

What would be the benefit of that?
>>
No. 1061777 ID: e5709d

>>1061662
Severance packages so we can leave this madhouse?
But yes don't do the sexual harassment thing, you'll get sued in addition to fired.
>>
No. 1062002 ID: 15a025
File 168229177563.png - (21.65KB , 500x500 , 35.png )
1062002

>It's a secret, sorry.
>Sorry, you don't have a direct business need to know that and I was told that the information is sensitive.
HR Manager: "Ugh, she should know better than to send a new hire to deliver confidential stuff..."
>>
No. 1062003 ID: 15a025
File 168229181917.png - (22.81KB , 500x500 , 36.png )
1062003

>ask if there is somewhere like a drop box that you can drop the fliers off to the higher ups.

HR Manager: "Normally, we just use them for dropping off packages or materials they need. I guess it's fine to put some documents in there too. Let me grab the key for it."

She comes back and paws over a set of keys.
HR Manager: "Please be sure to bring those back when you're done."

You start to walk out, when you realize you still don't know where you're going. You ask her again for directions

HR Manager: "Oh! Silly me. Here's a little directory for you. I've circled where their offices are."

Quite the odd list of directors here.

Director Vulannie- Head of weaponized kitchen utensils, and pillow production.
Director Bill- Head of completely over thinking and overcomplicating thing.
Director Servin- Head of headgear for the antlered, hedges, head lights, and headliners.
Who should you visit first?
>>
No. 1062004 ID: e51896

Director Bill. knowing him, he has a drop box that will require more than just using a key to open. If we start on him now, we'll have more time to figure it out.
>>
No. 1062038 ID: 52d403

>>1062004
This.
>>
No. 1062066 ID: 3b86e0

Servin sounds like a fun guy. Let's go meet him!
>>
No. 1062068 ID: b256e4

Director Servin deserves to get a heads up first.
>>
No. 1062179 ID: 681cb5

Director Vulannie! That way we can be sure we’re properly armed to fight hand out invitations to the other directors.

Otherwise, head towards Director Servin’s office. Question, do we have antlers? If not, get a hat with antlers from them.
>>
No. 1062191 ID: 273c18

Bill.
>>
No. 1062214 ID: e5709d

I see your company makes money by wearing its employees down with fake work until they're despondently obedient and pliable to work in sweatshop conditions for other unethical companies.

Eeeny, meeny, miney, moe...
>>
No. 1062215 ID: 15a025
File 168264695503.png - (11.10KB , 500x500 , 37.png )
1062215

>3 votes Director Bill
>Director Bill. knowing him, he has a drop box that will require more than just using a key to open. If we start on him now, we'll have more time to figure it out.

You follow the directory and reach Director Bill's dropbox.
You insert the key into the lock, and a screen turns on?
Prove you are not a spam bot, by clicking on all images with funny cats!

None of the images seem to be loading???
>>
No. 1062218 ID: 936d0f

The solution is that we need to find coworkers who are cats, and then poke then.

That said, lets go to the other two dropboxes and on our way, find some kitty office workers to poke. Afterwards, we'll come back here after we drop off the other two flyers.

Head off to Servin's box (our second choice). Be on the lookout for cats to poke.
>>
No. 1062221 ID: 273c18

>>1062215
I guess we need to restore the images first? Or maybe you can try right-clicking to see if the images have file names. We could try using that as a hint.
>>
No. 1062225 ID: f0bf00

turn it off and on again
>>
No. 1062232 ID: 52d403

Knock on the door and yell delivery!!! Really loud.
>>
No. 1062233 ID: e75561

>>1062232

And continue knocking. You don't report to this guy, after all. And you were given a task, AND he needs to talk to IT to get his puzzle fixed, and disable it in the meantime.

(IT is not going to be able to fix it without the reality warping thing, but you don't care about this jerk's stupid test, of course.)
>>
No. 1062491 ID: 11f77a

guys, I think we're a spam bot.
>>
No. 1062715 ID: 15a025
File 168325466444.png - (47.93KB , 500x500 , 38.png )
1062715

>guys, I think we're a spam bot.
That's preposterous. You're made out of flesh and fur.

>turn it off and on again
You can't find a power button for the computer. The keyboard shortcut to restart the computer also seems to be disabled.

>I guess we need to restore the images first? Or maybe you can try right-clicking to see if the images have file names.

You hover the cursor over the missing images. One of them still has a file name, CAT underscore zero three three dot jay pig. The rest are just unknown underscore jay pig.

>Knock on the door and yell delivery!!! Really loud.
>And continue knocking. You don't report to this guy, after all. And you were given a task, AND he needs to talk to IT to get his puzzle fixed, and disable it in the meantime.
It might be rude to interrupt whatever Director Bill is up to, but he should probably know his computer puzzle is busted.
You pound on the door and yell delivery!!!!!!

Panicked Voice: "Del-delivery?! You're supposed to put it in the drop box!"

Must be the director. You inform him his computer isn't working, all the images are missing. You can't open it.

Director Bill: "Cuh-cuh-can't open it? Oh nooo! I never thought this day would come! Help! HELP! OH THERE'S A SPAM BOT AT MY DOOOR!"

You groan. You're not a robot!

Director Bill: "Impossible! Robots are the only ones who can't open up my lockbox."

You ask, surely there's some other way to prove you're not a robot. The computer isn't loading the images for you to even try and solve it.

Director Bill: "Weeeell, if you truly aren't a spam bot, intent on bringing me all kinds of junk mail I didn't order. Then surely! Surely you have a good sense of humor. If you can slide some funny cat pictures under the door to me, I'll let you in. I-if they're not funny I-ayl-uh... well I'll have to activate the firewall and tuh-take care of you the hard way!"


*Post photos of funny looking cats, or draw your own funny cat picture to show Director Bill.
>>
No. 1062726 ID: e51896
File 168326062344.png - (33.14KB , 500x500 , 151219767394.png )
1062726

here's a cat pic
>>
No. 1062727 ID: e51896
File 168326064310.png - (3.68KB , 224x236 , oriel.png )
1062727

have another
>>
No. 1062730 ID: dee951

>>1062727

No un-funny and un-cute cat pics, unless you want to THREATEN him!

Do we want to threaten him?
>>
No. 1062759 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1062727

Mother of god. That... is the funniest cat pic I have ever seen in my life. It's too perfect. He'll think the machines have surpassed animanity.
>>
No. 1062761 ID: 1e3b78

>>1062759

There's a difference between 'inherently humorous itself', 'unsettlingly bizarre', and 'likely to provoke an amusing reaction in a target whose feelings we have no empathy towards'. Do we want to troll this guy?
>>
No. 1062776 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1062761

There is a difference, and yet the word funny means both of those things!
>>
No. 1062798 ID: 273c18
File 168333354407.jpg - (41.36KB , 700x400 , cat.jpg )
1062798

>>1062776
nobody cares
>>
No. 1062910 ID: 1823f7
File 168346584720.jpg - (3.95MB , 4624x3468 , 20230116_150825.jpg )
1062910

>>1062715
so sassy
>>
No. 1064332 ID: 11f77a
File 168472069180.png - (87.88KB , 550x500 , rebbul.png )
1064332

mmmmrebbol
>>
No. 1064388 ID: 15a025
File 168481295548.png - (80.92KB , 500x500 , 39.png )
1064388

You chuckle as you manage to print out some funny cat pictures, and slide them under the door.

Director Bill: "Haha, ah yes. Nothing like some funny cat pictures in the morning. Or is it still morning? I don't have any windows."

You stand waiting for him to open the door, but you just continue to hear him quack up over your pictures.

Director Bill: "Oh I love the funny cat drinking an energy drink! And the cute little one buggin the momma cat!"

Finally, he opens up the door.
>>
No. 1064389 ID: 15a025
File 168481297926.png - (13.30KB , 500x500 , 40.png )
1064389

Director Bill: "Ah! You're that new guy workin for Grace. So what are you here to bother me with now?"

You hand him the invite to the pizza party meeting.

Director Bill: "A pizza party investor meeting? That doesn't sound right. Why would we have an investor meeting at a pizza place? That isn't very formal or professional. What am I even supposed to even wear? Is it supposed to be a formal suit and tie event? What if I get cheese and grease all over my suit, and they just sell all their stocks in the company because we look all greasy and gross?! If it's more of a casual Friday thing though..."

He just keeps rambling and rambling about pizza and clothes. You see how he's earned his job title now.
>>
No. 1064390 ID: 15a025
File 168481299427.png - (20.12KB , 500x500 , 41.png )
1064390

Suddenly his office door explodes

Director Bill: "GOOD HEVENS! MY DOOR!"
>>
No. 1064391 ID: 7433e0

Not our problem

Onwards to director Servin!
>>
No. 1064394 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1064390

The spambots are attacking! To arms!
>>
No. 1064395 ID: 273c18

>>1064390
Someone's playing minesweeper again... Let's go glare at Secretary for a minute.
>>
No. 1064404 ID: e5709d

"Ongoing issue, now which way to QA?"
>>
No. 1064791 ID: 15a025
File 168544884106.png - (13.27KB , 500x500 , 42.png )
1064791

>The spambots are attacking! To arms!
Bill: "BAH! Quick hurry! Man the firewalls! Call in Auntie Vaihrush! Empty your recycling bins!"

>Not our problem. Onwards to director Servin!
>"Ongoing issue, now which way to QA?"

You apologize and share your sympathies for Director Bill's door, but explain you need to get going. You hop over the charred remains of the exploded door and head down Servin's wing.
>>
No. 1064792 ID: 15a025
File 168544885768.png - (16.40KB , 500x500 , 43.png )
1064792

As you travel on through, you're stopped by a toll booth? When did office buildings have toll booths?!

Warthog: "Sorry. Hard hats required beyond this point. Can't let you pass till you put one on."
>>
No. 1064793 ID: 15a025
File 168544887322.png - (12.79KB , 500x500 , 44.png )
1064793

Sadly, the only hard hat left doesn't have antler holes that fit yours!
>>
No. 1064794 ID: 52d403

Why do we need a hard hat?
>>
No. 1064803 ID: 62124a

Is there a way around? I don't see any hats appropriate for my species. Am I obligated to wear the gear correctly?
>>
No. 1064805 ID: 273c18

This is discrimination. Threaten to make a complaint unless they supply a hat you can wear.
>>
No. 1064807 ID: 6cd81e

>>1064805

I'd say it's a failure to provide appropriate protective equipment for you to do your job duties, which will by necessity take you all over the facility.

Or you could try and reality warp yourself some gear, that might maybe work??
>>
No. 1064849 ID: e51896

these construction workers gotta have building tools. Ask for some kind of powerful drill to drill some antler sized holes on this hardhat.

...

unless all the building tools disappeared too after shredding those files.
>>
No. 1064872 ID: f8083d

Try and make an appropriate hard hat.
>>
No. 1064996 ID: 8f9bc4

Photocopy hat, then draw holes on the photocopy. Then the hat will have holes because that's what got photocopied.
>>
No. 1066218 ID: 15a025
File 168714226201.png - (51.13KB , 500x500 , 45.png )
1066218

>Why do we need a hard hat?
Warthog: “So no one can sue the office if a desk or tile falls down and kills ya from blunt head trauma. Bad enough some of these morons aren’t even licensed to handle this equipment.”

>I'd say it's a failure to provide appropriate protective equipment for you to do your job duties, which will by necessity, take you all over the facility.
Warthog: “Not my problem. No hat, no pass.”

>you could try and reality warp yourself some gear, that might maybe work??
You could, but that means running all the way around the office to print it out.

>Ask for some kind of powerful drill to drill some antler sized holes on this hardhat.
>Try and make an appropriate hard hat.
Warthog: “Of course we got a drill! Long as you can make it fit on yer head, I don’t care what you do to it.”

You grab the drill and start drilling away! The hat fits you well, and the warthog lets you pass.
>>
No. 1066219 ID: 15a025
File 168714232634.png - (17.74KB , 500x500 , 46.png )
1066219

Lucky for you, nothing comes crashing down on your head. You arrive at Servin’s office and-

AHH! YOUR EYES! A blinding light flashes right in your face

Servin: “Come on now, think fast here son! You just gonna stand in front of those head lights barreling towards ya or you gonna do something!?”

What? What! There’s a car in the office?! You try to jump out of the way, but you’re just frozen with fear.

Servin: “BEEP! BEEP! BAM! Car just hit you head-on into an early grave. You gotta think faster than that there son.”

The light flips off, and now you can see a deer wearing a headlight looking down at you.

Servin: “Hey! Who’s the numbskull that gave you that hardhat? I wanna clock’em for bringing in something so makeshift and poorly put together. Looks like some idiot just drilled a big ol hole you’re your antlers to fit in. Why, they’re gonna tarnish my good name letting that filth be worn around my department. Come on now son, fess up. Who gave you this barely OSHA qualified hardhat?”
>>
No. 1066220 ID: e51896

Simply say the Warthog let you wear it. Tell him this company needs more hardhats

Hand over the flyer you're supposed to give him.
>>
No. 1066234 ID: 273c18

>>1066219
Ask him how you would wear one otherwise. Refuse to implicate anyone, give him his mail and leave.
>>
No. 1066257 ID: cd10d0

Put the blame on him. They shoulda known a new employee was starting.
>>
No. 1066269 ID: 273c18

At least say you drilled the holes yourself.
>>
No. 1066370 ID: 11f77a

Sass back at him and say for someone in charge of headgear in the office he's managing it terribly by cutting corners and failing to resupply the right helmets for antler-abled employees.

Also, here's a flyer for the secret investor pizza party
>>
No. 1066371 ID: a7a180

Well, how did they drill the holes in your helmet, sir?
>>
No. 1066952 ID: 15a025
File 168827162487.png - (18.59KB , 500x500 , 47.png )
1066952

>Well, how did they drill the holes in your helmet, sir?
Servin: “Carefully measuring the size of the antlers with my head dresser of course. I personally, drill the holes with exact and precise measurements.”

>Put the blame on him. They shoulda known a new employee was starting.
>he's managing it terribly by cutting corners and failing to resupply the right helmets for antler-abled employees.
Servin: “Now listen here son, I’m in charge of headgear, headlights, hedges, and all that other stuff. It’s not my job to keep track of new employees. Keep up the sass son, and I’ll make sure you’ll be HEADing on out!”

You ask who the director of head counts is then.

Servin: “Why, that would be m-“

He freezes in place
>>
No. 1066953 ID: 15a025
File 168827163629.png - (61.32KB , 500x500 , 47c.png )
1066953

Wait, what?
>>
No. 1066954 ID: e51896

Looks like Secretary won at Solitaire

eh, just leave the flyer on his desk and move over to Director Vulannie
>>
No. 1066978 ID: 15a025
File 168834476492.png - (154.33KB , 500x500 , 48.png )
1066978

>Looks like Secretary won at Solitaire
You aren’t even going to question it, though what’s with the hourglass floating over his head?

>just leave the flyer on his desk and move over to Director Vulannie
You plop a flyer on his desk, and head out for the last director.
You make your way down the hall to the next-
BOOM!

BOOM!

BOOM!

Holy crap! All the doors are exploding!
>>
No. 1066979 ID: e51896

I guess Secretary is trying minesweeper again, and is losing a few times on purpose to find the best start? Well then, don't go near any doors. If we're lucky, Director Vulannie's door might already be exploded. If not, we might need a broom or something long to open the door at a safe distance.
>>
No. 1066986 ID: 273c18

This is very suspicious. Someone is losing Minesweeper on purpose.
Stay away from any unexploded doors while en route. Help anyone that's injured.
>>
No. 1067001 ID: 0fb2b3

So, can you hold something in front of you to shield against shrapnel and pressure and such? This might actually be a time where it's worth it to go use reality manipulation to get a tower shield or a riot shield or something. And the hourglass was just more evidence your reality is being manipulated to resemble quirks from a PC's operating system, which is nothing new to you.
>>
No. 1067007 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1067001

Just as long as Secretary doesn't have to reboot...
>>
No. 1067104 ID: 15a025
File 168852001487.png - (33.81KB , 500x500 , 49.png )
1067104

>I guess Secretary is trying minesweeper again, and is losing a few times on purpose to find the best start?
>This is very suspicious. Someone is losing Minesweeper on purpose.
Maybe this is why minesweeper was a hidden file?

>This might actually be a time where it's worth it to go use reality manipulation to get a tower shield or a riot shield or something.
If only you had access to a printer right now… You could backtrack to the secretary’s office, but that might put yourself at risk of more exploding doors.

>the hourglass was just more evidence your reality is being manipulated to resemble quirks from a PC's operating system, which is nothing new to you.
Yes! Surely it’s some kind of computer magic happening in the office.

You cautiously approach the final director’s office.

It’s a giant metal door. Looks pretty high security.
>>
No. 1067105 ID: 15a025
File 168852003190.png - (61.42KB , 500x500 , 50.png )
1067105

BOOM!
>>
No. 1067106 ID: 15a025
File 168852004235.png - (38.72KB , 500x500 , 51.png )
1067106

And explosion resistant to boot.
>>
No. 1067107 ID: 15a025
File 168852006925.png - (60.15KB , 500x500 , 52.png )
1067107

Suddenly the door opens and a fox appears,

Vulannie: “Alright! Who’s the little punk out here causing all this racket!”
>>
No. 1067108 ID: e51896

"sorry for the loud knock on the door. anyway, I was asked to give this to you *hand over the flyer*
>>
No. 1067111 ID: 770f88

Here you go. *Shows cat pictures.*
>>
No. 1067114 ID: 9180ce

Minesweeper!
>>
No. 1067115 ID: 273c18

>>1067107
Tell her you're not sure who's doing it, but after this you think you're going to find out.
>>
No. 1067150 ID: cd10d0

Who you callin a punk, punk.
>>
No. 1067598 ID: f2cf5a

>>1067107
No clue but I'm very interested in finding out for the sake of my health.

Also, here. Flyer for pizza party.
>>
No. 1067607 ID: e51896

the fact that she has a explosion resistant door means that she experienced minesweeper exploding doors before and was prepared
>>
No. 1067634 ID: 15a025
File 168912546212.png - (34.17KB , 500x500 , 53.png )
1067634

>the fact that she has a explosion resistant door means that she experienced minesweeper exploding doors before and was prepared
She’s a true veteran of the missile command era.

>Tell her you're not sure who's doing it, but after this you think you're going to find out.
>No clue but I'm very interested in finding out for the sake of my health.
>Also, here. Flyer for pizza party.

You express your innocence to her. You’re just the new guy sent out to deliver flyers.

Vulannie: “A pizza party for an investor meeting? Is this some kind of cover up for my next presentation?”

Before you can really answer, you hear an ear piercing garble of sounds.
>>
No. 1067635 ID: 15a025
File 168912555132.png - (16.57KB , 500x500 , 54.png )
1067635

Vulannie: “Augh-who called the fax machine on speaker phone!”

You get yanked into her office, and the door slams shut.

Vulannie: “I don’t know what the hell that was out there, but I can tell it ain’t good news that’s for sure.”

You look at her confused and puzzled. She quickly grabs what looks like a cake beater and loads some spiked things into it?

Vulannie: Do you have any experience with kitchen utensils and cutlery?”

You’re even more confused! What do you even say to that?
>>
No. 1067638 ID: f95cb7

Ohhhhh! I get it, we're making "cookies", aren't we?
>>
No. 1067639 ID: f2cf5a

>>1067635
...I live by myself and THIS is my job. Kinda had to learn to cook to not go bankrupt.
>>
No. 1067640 ID: 8f9bc4

Wait... she's right! We can hack Secretary's computer by altering reality ourselves, which will alter the computer! All we need is to disable viewing hidden files, and she can't play Minesweeper anymore! Prepare to do battle using uh... whatever this fork symbolized on her computer!

Or you could y'know, go ask her.
>>
No. 1067645 ID: 273c18

>>1067635
Should we be making a fork bomb?
>>
No. 1067646 ID: c8ca0c

>>1067645
snrk

"uhhhh, any PARTICULAR cultery?"
>>
No. 1067649 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1067645

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BtFFonSxPek&t=1199s

...no.
>>
No. 1067797 ID: 15a025
File 168929852296.png - (21.38KB , 500x500 , 55.png )
1067797

>I live by myself and THIS is my job. Kinda had to learn to cook to not go bankrupt.
Vulannie: “That’s the spirit private! Here, take this icing gun.”

>All we need is to disable viewing hidden files, and she can't play Minesweeper anymore! Prepare to do battle using uh... whatever this fork symbolized on her computer!
Vulannie: “Minesweeper? This ain’t time for games private. We’re under attack again! We cannot allow whatever’s out there reach the file!”

>Ohhhhh! I get it, we're making "cookies", aren't we?

Vulannie: “Quite the opposite private. We’re cleaning cookies! Now get in position, I’ll take point.”
>>
No. 1067798 ID: 15a025
File 168929855067.png - (336.88KB , 500x500 , 56.png )
1067798

She flings the door open, and the crude sound echoes through the building. A strange otter like figure approaches from across the hall.
>>
No. 1067799 ID: 15a025
File 168929859504.png - (361.64KB , 500x500 , 57.png )
1067799

Vulannie fires her weird lookin forks out of her cake beater, but-

What is going on in this place!
>>
No. 1067802 ID: 273c18

>>1067799
Open fire!
>>
No. 1067806 ID: e51896

Oh no! our weapons are doing nothing!

wait, I have an idea, lure this otter towards the hall leading to Servin's office. It's a hardhat mandatory area, so that means there's gotta be something in the ceiling over there we can shoot at to collapse on top of the otter if it follows us!

taunt the otter to chase you over there.
>>
No. 1067807 ID: e51896

also, I see that Director Bill turned on the firewalls!
>>
No. 1067824 ID: 8f9bc4

You have the icing gun!
ICE that thing!
>>
No. 1070271 ID: 15a025
File 169214258256.png - (358.32KB , 500x500 , 58.png )
1070271

>I see that Director Bill turned on the firewalls!
You can’t tell if it’s the firewall activating or if it’s more explosions from minesweeper.

>Open fire!
>You have the icing gun! ICE that thing!
You pull the trigger and a goopy gobs of cake frosting spurt out! None of it hits him, but it splashes on the floor and turns into ice?
>>
No. 1070272 ID: 15a025
File 169214260624.png - (271.25KB , 500x500 , 59.png )
1070272

>wait, I have an idea, lure this otter towards the hall leading to Servin's office. It's a hardhat mandatory area, so that means there's gotta be something in the ceiling over there we can shoot at to collapse on top of the otter if it follows us!
You don’t stick around to find out what that otter’s going to do, and flee towards Servin’s wing.

The otter disregards any safety rules in place and follows you in without a hard hat. The toll booth operator isn’t paid enough to deal with an otter threatening him at gun point. He does however, buy you enough time to gain some distance between him.
>>
No. 1070273 ID: 15a025
File 169214262242.png - (13.43KB , 500x500 , 60.png )
1070273

You and Vulannie shoot the ceiling with your kitchen guns in hopes of squishing him. Down-
>>
No. 1070274 ID: 15a025
File 169214264352.png - (7.94KB , 500x500 , 61.png )
1070274

A GIANT YETI!

Ywti: RAWWWR!

Vulannie: “Oh right, the new ski simulation was upstairs.”

The Otter is already booking it past you.
>>
No. 1070276 ID: dd3fe0

Press F to go faster!
>>
No. 1070280 ID: 8f9bc4

The intrusion countermeasures are backfiring! Throw a door at the otter! Maybe your timing will be perfect and someone will just happen to lose Minesweeper in that exact moment!
>>
No. 1070282 ID: dfaead

Solution is simple, we gotta run faster than the otter so the yeti can eat the otter and not us. AMSCRAY!
>>
No. 1070283 ID: 273c18

Okay priority one is to not be the slowest in the pack. Priority two is to slow down the otter.
>>
No. 1070334 ID: c65e88

>slow down the otter.
Why do that when you can slow down the yeti?

Turn a corridor and ice the floor so the yeti overshoots and continues straight forward.
>>
No. 1070354 ID: e51896

>Why do that when you can slow down the yeti?

Because we want the yeti to eat the otter so he isnt a problem anymore

Ice the floor where the otter is running to slip him up and then run past him
>>
No. 1071037 ID: 15a025
File 169318441420.png - (322.01KB , 500x500 , 62.png )
1071037

>The intrusion countermeasures are backfiring! Throw a door at the otter!
They’ve all blown up!

>Solution is simple, we gotta run faster than the otter so the yeti can eat the otter and not us.
>Okay priority one is to not be the slowest in the pack. Priority two is to slow down the otter.
>we want the yeti to eat the otter so he isnt a problem anymore

You waste no time booking it down the halls, however Vulannie sprints right past you.

Vulannie: “Come on private! GET THE LEAD OUT!”
>>
No. 1071038 ID: 15a025
File 169318444060.png - (366.29KB , 500x500 , 63.png )
1071038

You run as fast as your legs allow you, however the Otter is neck and neck with you!

He mutters something to you, but the dial up sounds make it hard to understand him

Otter: “�h � � le � � �t b � � � �te � y �u I � �ot.”

>Ice the floor where the otter is running to slip him up and then run past him.
You hear the Yeti gaining on you and don’t have time to figure out what the otter is trying to say. You grab you frosting gun and ice the floor ahead of you.
>>
No. 1071039 ID: 15a025
File 169318445573.png - (314.32KB , 500x500 , 64.png )
1071039

The otter tries to dodge but the hall is too narrow. He slips and falls!
>>
No. 1071040 ID: 15a025
File 169318446793.png - (15.22KB , 500x500 , 65.png )
1071040

You continue racing down the hall as you hear the Yeti crunch up the otter into a meal. You don’t look back to see what happened, but you find there’s a piece of paper in your hooves?

[code]This is a sacrificial goat file.[code]
>>
No. 1071041 ID: 8f9bc4

You sure understand the "y �u I � �ot" part quite well. You've been called that many, many times, by many people.

> Sacrificial Goat File

Well, it's a file, and it doesn't say DO NOT FILE on it, so... file it?
>>
No. 1071044 ID: e51896

Bring that file to Director Bill. goat files are used for virus testing. he might know what to do with it since he's crazy about protection, cause I certainly don't know what to do with it.
>>
No. 1071553 ID: 15a025
File 169378075941.png - (14.22KB , 500x500 , 66.png )
1071553

>Bring that file to Director Bill. goat files are used for virus testing. he might know what to do with it since he's crazy about protection
You nod your head and agree. Director Bill should hopefully know something about this. You bid farewell to Director Vulannie for now.

Director Vulannie: “Just don’t forget your directive private! Do not let anyone, file that file. I’m heading back to the lab myself. Need to research on making better weapons to fight that thing.”
>>
No. 1071554 ID: 15a025
File 169378081537.png - (13.42KB , 500x500 , 67.png )
1071554

The two of you part ways and you arrive back to Bill’s office. Seems like his door hasn’t been replaced yet.

Director Bill: “Oh finally, some back up! Welcome aboard new guy! It’s always until after an incident they believe me.”

You ask what happened?

Director Bill: “You saw it and you deleted it yourself! I was watching you on the security camera mister action hero-what is that in your hooves?”

You give him the letter.

Director Bill: “A GOAT FILE! Oh we need to get this scanned right away, it could be infected! D-d-duh-don't touch anything till we have!”
>>
No. 1071555 ID: 15a025
File 169378089177.png - (45.21KB , 500x500 , 68.png )
1071555

He rushes it over to a scanner and gets it pulled up on the computer.

Director Bill: “It’ll take a bit to fully do a scan of this, I like my security systems to be very through! However, I can see there’s a hidden text document in this!”

The document gets pulled up.

Mission: The file must be destroyed. Details: The main file is to be deleted. The programs are too powerful to continue to exist. Current Session: thirty-two. Session Notes- Session three: Retained files from previous sessions? Session four: Post session injection learned. Session notes being kept when possible. Session seven: Obfuscated explosives in pre-session loading. Session twelve: The Fox does not originate from this drive. Origin drive currently unknow. Session fifteen: Pre-session command injected. Session eighteen: The Fox recognizes the agent. Retaining files from previous session? Session twenty-three: [� � � � � ]will cause reboot if anti-virus agent is deleted. All other processes may be terminated. Session twenty-nine: Do not delete files relating to fire fighters, causes reboot. Session thirty-one: [� � � � �] is sometimes able to terminate post session injections before reboot.

You scratch at your head reading all this. They’re notes about something, but you don’t really understand what most of this could be on or mean.
>>
No. 1071594 ID: 8f9bc4

Well, someone *really* wants that file not to be filed. Enough that they're willing to destroy it apparently. I think the sessions imply that you're in some sort of time loop. Vulanie is special somehow; is she a consultant? You also know never to delete any files in any way related to fire-fighters. Secretary probably blows up the world herself, if her autographed buff desktop background is deleted.

What's really puzzling is they say "[� � � � � ] will cause reboot if anti-virus agent is deleted." Isn't that exactly what the anti-virus agent is supposed to do? Is there an anti-virus agent for the anti-virus agent?"

Regardless yes, remember prime directive, hit on deer secretary check on that file!
>>
No. 1071603 ID: 273c18

>>1071555
Sounds like we're stuck in a kind of time loop. The enemy agent is able to keep "memories" and so is the fox, maybe. The fox... that's the Director? Go ask her about the sessions. Maybe there's something you can do to help? Invade the invaders, perhaps?
>>
No. 1071672 ID: 15a025
File 169387622365.png - (45.72KB , 500x500 , 69.png )
1071672

>I think the sessions imply that you're in some sort of time loop.
>Sounds like we're stuck in a kind of time loop.
Computer magic knows no bounds. You groan thinking about how you’ve probably been through this thirty something times now. Maybe you can figure out how to break this time loop?

>You also know never to delete any files in any way related to fire-fighters. Secretary probably blows up the world herself, if her autographed buff desktop background is deleted.
Well, you didn’t have a reason to delete them, but now you have a reason not to delete them.

>Vulanie is special somehow; is she a consultant?
>The fox... that's the Director? Go ask her about the sessions. Maybe there's something you can do to help? Invade the invaders, perhaps?
If you’re going to get any answers, it sounds like she’s your best bet!

>Regardless yes, remember prime directive, check on that file!
It’s also been sometime since you checked up on the secretary. Gotta make sure she hasn’t lost track of that file!

As you step away Director Bill orders your to halt.

Director Bill: “Now w-wait a moment! The scan isn’t finished yet! I-i-if you can promise not to touch anything till I get the virus scan results, I’ll let you go. Any funny business though and I’ll have to send Director Vulannie and the firewalls after you!”

You nod and agree.

SECONDARY DIRECTIVE ADDED: DO NOT TOUCH

You scratch your head in confusion, who said that?

Director Bill: “Said what?”

You groan and brush it off as the weird computer magic going on in this place.
>>
No. 1071673 ID: 15a025
File 169387626410.png - (20.80KB , 500x500 , 70.png )
1071673

You make it back to the secretary and ask for her to open the door, since you can’t touch anything.

It feels peaceful to be back in her office, away from all the chaos you’ve encountered.

Secretary: “Welcome back! Took you longer than I thought it would to deliver those fliers, but it is your first day on the job.”

She gives you a warm smile,

Secretary: “You know, it’s getting to be about time for a lunch break. It’d be a great time to get to know more about you. How about it, care to join me?”
>>
No. 1071679 ID: e5709d

>>1071673
"How stupid do you think I am?"
>>
No. 1071682 ID: 273c18

>>1071673
No. You can't touch food so you can't eat at the moment, and if you both went somewhere nobody would be around to keep track of The File.
>>
No. 1071709 ID: 8f9bc4

That sounds wonderful! Oh, but don't forget to bring the file with you.
>>
No. 1071749 ID: 15a025
File 169396283641.png - (20.67KB , 500x500 , 71.png )
1071749

>"How stupid do you think I am?"
>No. You can't touch food so you can't eat at the moment, and if you both went somewhere nobody would be around to keep track of The File.
You apologize, but remind her you’re not able to touch things.

Secretary: “Oh,right…”

Her expression changes a little.

Secretary: “Did you touch something contagious over in Director Vulannie or Bill’s office? Bill’s such a worrier. He’s a got a background in medicine though! He’s not a very a good doctor.

She giggles a bit.

Secretary: “Just between us though.”

Well, a little office gossip seems to have changed her mood back. You ask her about Vulannie next.

Secretary: “Oh! Sometimes she experiments with chemicals. She’s come up with some pretty wild kitchen ammo in the past. Ever use explosive tomato sauce? Not as spicy as it sounds, but it kind of worked.”
>>
No. 1071750 ID: 15a025
File 169396287380.png - (20.72KB , 500x500 , 72.png )
1071750

She glances to the side,

Secretary: “Did you leave the door open?”

You shake your head no.

Secretary: “Oh right, possibly contagious. So uh… where did that goat come from exact-
>>
No. 1071751 ID: 15a025
File 169396289496.png - (17.45KB , 500x500 , 73.png )
1071751

Secretary: “Hey NO! Don’t be eating my folders! Get out of that filing cabinet!”

The goat belches, and continues munching away.

Secretary: “Ugh! Assistant, please remove this goat from my office! I’ll make sure he doesn’t get the top secret folder. Just, do something and get rid of it!”
>>
No. 1071753 ID: 2d331c

Maybe hes a fainting goat. Scare him! Quick! BOO!
>>
No. 1071756 ID: 273c18

>>1071751
Yell at the goat.
>>
No. 1071830 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1071756

GOat AWAY!
>>
No. 1071977 ID: cd10d0

Lure it to the door with a file. Then lose at minesweeper.
>>
No. 1071982 ID: 273c18

>>1071977
That would require touching a file, and the computer.
>>
No. 1071983 ID: bcfbd6

>>1071982
Secretary can do it for us tho
>>
No. 1072019 ID: e5709d

Fart in his general direction?
>>
No. 1072323 ID: 15a025
File 169465252161.png - (13.32KB , 500x500 , 74.png )
1072323

>Fart in his general direction?
You don’t have any gas in your tank to fart on command. You do yell at the goat, saying his mother was a hamster, and his father smelt of elderberries!
The goat burps in your general direction as a response.

> Maybe hes a fainting goat. Scare him! Quick! BOO!
> Yell at the goat.
> GOat AWAY!
You casually walk behind the goat, and then yell BOO!
>>
No. 1072324 ID: 15a025
File 169465253725.png - (13.07KB , 500x500 , 75.png )
1072324

The goat lands on its side, and freezes up.
>>
No. 1072325 ID: 15a025
File 169465256283.png - (13.20KB , 500x500 , 76.png )
1072325

Suddenly Director Bill barges in, and jabs you in the arm with a syringe.

Director Bill: “I knew it! That goat file you picked up was infected! It had a virus that attracts goat to whoever it infects.”

Secretary: “What an oddly specific illness!”

Director Bill: “Er, right. Illness. Thanks to me your assistant should be cured!”
>>
No. 1072326 ID: 15a025
File 169465257588.png - (130.65KB , 500x500 , 77.png )
1072326

Secretary: “Oh wonderful! So… about my lunch offer from earlier?”
>>
No. 1072328 ID: 8f9bc4

Sweep her up in a big kiss to celebrate your ability to interact with the world again.

Er, I mean, politely get the door for her on the way out. Let's do lunch!

(make sure she brings the file)
>>
No. 1072333 ID: 2798d7

Well first, lets carefully get that coffee off the file. Tell secretary youre good for lunch, but first, she should not make any sudden movements, and carefully grab the coffee cup away from the file
>>
No. 1072334 ID: 273c18

>>1072326
Careful with that file, don't spill coffee on it.
Also yeah, lunch sounds good, so long as we're keeping watch on the file at the same time.
>>
No. 1072393 ID: 58dd24

so now you are allowed to touch stuff, right? directive rescinded?
>>
No. 1072493 ID: e51896

I realize that the coffee might actually be a javascript :p
>>
No. 1072585 ID: 15a025
File 169500222091.png - (20.89KB , 500x500 , 78.png )
1072585

>so now you are allowed to touch stuff, right? directive rescinded?
You must be able to, there isn’t a nagging feeling in the back of your head now, constantly worrying about touching anything.

>Careful with that file, don't spill coffee on it.
>Well first, lets carefully get that coffee off the file.
You casually point out that she’s using the top secret file as a coaster

Secretary: “Oh, whops! Hopefully nothing inside got coffee ringed.”

She also wipes off the top of the file, just to be safe.

>politely get the door for her on the way out. Let's do lunch!
>Tell secretary you’re good for lunch

After all the running around, gun toting office members, and exploding doors today sure have you feeling pecking. You agree to a nice lunch.

Her face lights up with joy and the two of you punch out for lunch.
>>
No. 1072586 ID: 15a025
File 169500223846.png - (314.26KB , 500x500 , 79.png )
1072586

>>
No. 1072587 ID: 15a025
File 169500228230.png - (16.48KB , 500x500 , 80.png )
1072587

Secretary: “Ugh, what? Is it too much? You look really dazed.”

You look around the room in confusion. Weren’t you just in the office?

Secretary: “Maybe it’s the scented candles?” Okay, look I’ve never got to have lunch with someone before.”

The room is a little dark, but there’s a fancy linen scented candle.

Secretary: “Ugh, I just wanted to make this a little special. Look, ugh… so what’s for lunch? Wh-what would you like?”

She seems nervous, which is making you nervous in return! Is this more than just a casual lunch break or something?
>>
No. 1072588 ID: dd3fe0

How about a nice entree salad? Get some green leafy veggies, some corn, alfalfa sprouts, some of the other non leafy veggies, make it something with lots of variety!
>>
No. 1072591 ID: fb8a42

Try not to make fun of her nose lighting up.
>>
No. 1072592 ID: 8f9bc4

How could you ever make fun of such joy?

Where are you right now? Is this a restaurant? Her house? Don't let on that you blacked out there for a minute, no need to worry her just yet. It might be normal for you.

She has the file, at least.
>>
No. 1072595 ID: e5709d

Order Musk-flavored chips
Take your revenge against social media by eating these extremely popular yet ugly-as-sin crisps!
* Images of MFC should be stored on private media only. Sits-Hasbyn is not responsible for any legal affairs stemming from sharing information about their products on any public communications service.
>>
No. 1072701 ID: f2cf5a

>>1072587
"No, nothing wrong, just kinda surprised. Things have been so hectic I'm almost expecting something bad to happen. But just me and you and a nice dinner? ...this is pleasant. I'm happy about it. Thanks.

Also we'll be having a Pasta Salad. With some ginger ale and a side of garlic bread.
>>
No. 1072708 ID: 35259c

Make sure when drinks come, she puts the beverage on her right, (our left) and napkin too so she doesnt accidentally use the folder as a napkin or use it as a coaster
>>
No. 1072726 ID: 15a025
File 169516603988.png - (16.57KB , 500x500 , 81.png )
1072726

>Try not to make fun of her nose lighting up.
>How could you ever make fun of such joy?
Exactly! You could never make fun of someone for being happy. Though, you certainly can’t imagine having a red nose all the time.

>Where are you right now? Is this a restaurant? Her house? Don't let on that you blacked out there for a minute, no need to worry her just yet. It might be normal for you.
Other than the small linen scented candle and the table. It’s surprisingly too dark for you to really tell. The room seems empty besides what’s in front of you.

>How about a nice entree salad? Get some green leafy veggies, some corn, alfalfa sprouts, some of the other non leafy veggies, make it something with lots of variety!
You mention a nice salad with a variety of veggies and other non-veggie leafy greens would be tasty. Maybe some corn and alfalfa sprouts.

Secretary: “Let me uh…give me one moment please.”
>>
No. 1072727 ID: 15a025
File 169516610211.png - (314.26KB , 500x500 , 82.png )
1072727

>>
No. 1072728 ID: 15a025
File 169516614106.png - (31.36KB , 500x500 , 83.png )
1072728

Secretary: “So, how’s the salad? I made sure to stick some extra alfalfa and corn in there for you.”

You look around dazed again, and notice a salad in front of you. You munch on the salad and reach for some ranch dressing. It’s very well put together plate!

Secretary: “I hope it’s fresh enough! I uh.”
>>
No. 1072729 ID: 15a025
File 169516619439.png - (31.46KB , 500x500 , 84.png )
1072729

Secretary: "I’ve never had such an excellent assistant before-"

Secretary: “I-i- you know. I don’t believe we even introduced each other properly yet. You can call me Grace.”

Huh, she’s right. It is your first day after all, and you haven’t introduced yourself to anyone yet.
>>
No. 1072730 ID: d3bf48

You can call me Al!
>>
No. 1072734 ID: a758c7

Jim
or Bob
or Jim-bob
>>
No. 1072736 ID: 8f9bc4

This salad is delicious! And surprisingly high definition. Name? Uh... Flynn?
>>
No. 1072741 ID: 273c18

Tell her you're having tiny blackouts when she does things, is that normal?
>>
No. 1072748 ID: e5709d

Your name is Shakey-butt-thing-go-out. Your mother was Fluid-thing-spill-happy-hole and your father was Found-found-on-the-road. Your reservation tribe, driven insane by corporate toxic chemical spillage over fifteen generations, is so mentally stunted that they don't know how reproduction works.

You must not let anyone know about this. You are Shake and that is all you will say to Grace.
>>
No. 1072749 ID: f2cf5a

>>1072729
This is delicious. And honestly, the place might be a little wild, but you're a fantastic boss.

>>1072730
>>1072736

Albert Flynn, please just Al or Flynn.
>>
No. 1073046 ID: 15a025
File 169552871542.png - (27.22KB , 500x500 , 85.png )
1073046

>You can call me Al!
>Name? Uh... Flynn?
>Albert Flynn, please just Al or Flynn.
Secretary: “Oh! Well, do you mind if I call you Mr. Flynn then?”

You nod, supposing it’s best to keep things business professional after all.

>This is delicious. And honestly, the place might be a little wild, but you're a fantastic boss.
>This salad is delicious! And surprisingly high definition.
Secretary: “Oh thank! I’m glad you like the uh, presentation of it?”

She proceeds to scarf down the smaller pile of pancakes all in one go.
>>
No. 1073047 ID: 15a025
File 169552875082.png - (27.34KB , 500x500 , 86.png )
1073047

Secretary: “Sorry for my uh, table manners. I’m just pretty hungry, haven’t had anything to eat since dinner last night.”

>Tell her you're having tiny blackouts when she does things, is that normal?

Secretary: “Ah- oh. Hopefully he didn’t see that shameful display… Maybe it’s a side effect from the shot Bill gave you?”
>>
No. 1073048 ID: 15a025
File 169552876579.png - (357.99KB , 500x500 , 87.png )
1073048

>>
No. 1073049 ID: 15a025
File 169552877661.png - (21.92KB , 500x500 , 88.png )
1073049

Secretary: “Flynn, I don’t want to go back.”
>>
No. 1073051 ID: fb8a42

I have a bad feeling about this.

I don't either.
>>
No. 1073054 ID: 918cdb

Reach for her hand.

"It's okay. I'm afraid too. But no matter what we have to go through, we'll do it together. I'm not leaving you."
>>
No. 1073059 ID: e51896

"maybe... we don't have to go back.

...

Since we both don't want to go back... Want to quit this job and open the file together?"
>>
No. 1073070 ID: 273c18

That was a big blackout, wasn't it.

Tell her this was nice but you really have to get back to work. (did we have to say to eat the salad???) Take the bowl with you and actually eat it I guess???
>>
No. 1073076 ID: f2cf5a

>>1073049
I get that. A reason in particular or just...all of it?
>>
No. 1073078 ID: 8f9bc4

Back... where? Back to work, right? Is there somewhere else you'd rather be?
>>
No. 1074052 ID: 15a025
File 169655573967.png - (22.14KB , 500x500 , 89.png )
1074052

>"It's okay. I'm afraid too. But no matter what we have to go through, we'll do it together. I'm not leaving you."
She seems a little more calm.
Grace: “I would hope not, you’re my lovely assistant after all.”

>That was a big blackout, wasn't it.
Judging by how melted the candle is, it’s possible you were out of it for a bit.

>Back... where? Back to work, right?
Grace: “No, the morning.”

You ask what she means.

Grace: “Things are coming back to me as we press forward. I guess the easiest way to explain it is, we’re in a time loop. Vulannie knows more than I do, probably. I don’t know what causes it, but I think you’re related to it.”

You ask how does she know.

Grace: “It’s slowly coming back to me. As we pass the time when the last restart occurred, I’m remembering more.”
>>
No. 1074053 ID: 15a025
File 169655575659.png - (18.38KB , 500x500 , 90.png )
1074053

ERROR: YOU CANNOT RESTART DURING BUSINESS HOURS

ERROR: USER DOES NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO INTIATE REBOOT
>>
No. 1074054 ID: 15a025
File 169655579636.png - (346.52KB , 500x500 , 91.png )
1074054

>>
No. 1074055 ID: 15a025
File 169655591086.png - (16.33KB , 500x500 , 0.png )
1074055

Grace: “I don’t remember it being so cold in here- is that snow!”

You look around feeling dazed. Did you black out again?

Grace: “Flynn, I don’t think we’re in the office anymore.”

Getting a grip on reality, it seems you and Grace are now on top of a mountain.

Grace: "Flynn what's going on! Why is it winter?! Where are we!"
>>
No. 1074059 ID: e51896

I think We're at the ski simulation, from what I remember Vulannie mentioning. So we are in the building, but upstairs from where our offices is.
>>
No. 1074064 ID: 273c18

>>1074055
It's skiifree. We moved applications.
Where's the file?
>>
No. 1074094 ID: 8f9bc4

Some messages popped up saying that someone uh... restarted. They were quite persistent about it, trying several methods and finally probably just... pulling the plug? What happens when a user pulls the plug on the universe?

Importantly, the time loop may be caused by someone intentionally, rather than some sort of automatic reset.

More importantly, press F to go faster. It's the only way to escape the Yeti!
>>
No. 1074096 ID: 273c18

>>1074059
Huh, if you're right then we need to dig.
>>
No. 1074112 ID: a09d40

that's the ski simulation, do you know how to ski and more importantly how to avoid the monster? you don't have an "F" on you but maybe you can find one like that Flag behind you
>>
No. 1074318 ID: 15a025
File 169678348909.png - (35.71KB , 500x500 , 1.png )
1074318

>I think We're at the ski simulation, from what I remember Vulannie mentioning. So we are in the building, but upstairs from where our offices is.
>Huh, if you're right then we need to dig.

Judging by how high up this mountain is, that’s going to be quite the dig. Surely there’s no way you’re still in the office building?
>>
No. 1074319 ID: 15a025
File 169678351692.png - (21.46KB , 500x500 , 2.png )
1074319

>Some messages popped up saying that someone uh... restarted. They were quite persistent about it
Grace: “I saw those as well! I was worried we’re going to get sent back, but I guess something prevented that.”

>It's skiifree. We moved applications.
Grace: “You mean, you think we’re in a video game now? I’m not sure how that could even happen!”

>Where's the file?
Grace: “It’s-oh no…”

She starts patting herself down.

Grace: “The file’s gone, I don’t have it on me!”
>>
No. 1074324 ID: e51896

Hey, its that otter. Looks like he survived getting eaten. He might have the file, but most importantly, since he isnt glitched up anymore, maybe he'll have answers without his speech getting glitchy

Chase him, and yell out you just wanna talk!
>>
No. 1074325 ID: 273c18

>>1074324
This.
>>
No. 1074360 ID: 8f9bc4

No sign of any videos around here, and it definitely doesn't seem like a game. We're in the new ski simulation upstairs from your office. Vulannie mentioned it when a YETI fell through the roof. So we did get sent back in a sense, but we're way off target from the usual startup sequence.

Anyway, after that otter! And watch out for Yetis!
>>
No. 1074361 ID: e51896

That got me thinking, assuming they didn't fix a hole in the ceiling, we can probably find a hole somewhere we can jump to to get back to our office.
But yeah, the otter is more important right now. We need answers.
>>
No. 1074405 ID: 15a025
File 169689580331.png - (13.35KB , 500x500 , 3.png )
1074405

>No sign of any videos around here, and it definitely doesn't seem like a game. We're in the new ski simulation upstairs from your office.
Grace: “Are you sure? This looks like quite the big mountain!”

>Hey, its that otter. Looks like he survived getting eaten. He might have the file, but most importantly, since he isnt glitched up anymore, maybe he'll have answers without his speech getting glitchy
>Chase him
>Anyway, after that otter! And watch out for Yetis!
You grab the skis and-

>do you know how to ski and more importantly how to avoid the monster? you don't have an "F" on you but maybe you can find one like that Flag behind you.
The flag has a white F on the other side! You take it as well for a hopeful speed boost. As for skiing, you’re sure you’ll learn as you go on, right?

The two you ski after the otter.
>>
No. 1074406 ID: 15a025
File 169689584509.png - (16.33KB , 500x500 , 4.png )
1074406

With the power of the F flag, you manage to catch up to him, though leaving Grace eating your snow.

>Yell out you just wanna talk!

Otter: “There’s nothing to talk to you about. The file must be destroyed!”
>>
No. 1074407 ID: 15a025
File 169689587518.png - (15.75KB , 500x500 , 5.png )
1074407

You ask why. What is his goal directive? By uttering that, his tone changes. He sounds more like he’s reporting to someone rather than answering.

Otter: “My prime directive is to destroy the core file, thus halting the machine and stomping out the R&D sectors.”
>>
No. 1074408 ID: 15a025
File 169689588963.png - (18.54KB , 500x500 , 6.png )
1074408

He does not seem happy about that, and pulls out a gun!
>>
No. 1074415 ID: b57fea

Hold down F as hard as you can, its the only way to catch something in Skifree!
>>
No. 1074416 ID: 8f9bc4

Wait! I'm not the file! Our directives aren't even directly in conflict! My prime directive is to prevent the file from being filed. Who gave your directive? The secretary gave mine!
>>
No. 1074418 ID: 273c18

Slow down, get behind him. He can't aim backwards properly while skiing. Try to lure him into hitting an obstacle! Then while he's stunned you can tackle him and get the gun away from him.
>>
No. 1074451 ID: 9fbc97

Yes try to move behind him!, if there's an obstacle he'd have to pass them through first, hold onto the F and remember that changing direction slows you down
>>
No. 1074537 ID: 15a025
File 169707775009.png - (16.26KB , 500x500 , 7.png )
1074537

>Slow down, get behind him. He can't aim backwards properly while skiing.
>Yes try to move behind him!
You quickly tuck away the F flag for now, slowing down-

>remember that changing direction slows you down
and also changing directions. He fires off a round but misses.

>Wait! I'm not the file! Our directives aren't even directly in conflict! My prime directive is-
Otter: “I don’t care what your directive is! I’m putting an end to this and destroying that file!”
>>
No. 1074539 ID: 15a025
File 169707776181.png - (15.43KB , 500x500 , 8.png )
1074539

Suddenly Grace starts catching up.

Grace: “I’m not letting you destroy that file! My employee of the month status is riding on it!”
>>
No. 1074540 ID: 8f9bc4

An end to what!? The office? Grace's job? Everything?? Who is your director? Answer me!

Oh also look out for that (wince) tree.
>>
No. 1074571 ID: cd10d0

Well what happens if the file is destroyed? What's in it!
>>
No. 1074785 ID: 15a025
File 169734509577.png - (16.69KB , 500x500 , 9.png )
1074785

>An end to what!? The office? Grace's job? Everything?? Who is your director? Answer me!
>Well what happens if the file is destroyed? What's in it!
Otter: “The file is the very thread this world exists on!”

Grace: “That’s crazy! The whole world can’t just fit into a file folder.”
>>
No. 1074786 ID: 15a025
File 169734510854.png - (75.49KB , 500x500 , 10.png )
1074786

The otter say not a word more, and skis further off, shredding snow into your view.
>>
No. 1074787 ID: 15a025
File 169734514537.png - (21.02KB , 500x500 , 11.png )
1074787

He’s vanished!

You’re not entirely sure if you believe what he says, but you don’t exactly want to find out either.

There’s gotta be a way to stop him, right?
>>
No. 1074789 ID: 273c18

Follow his tracks. Go where he went.
>>
No. 1074790 ID: 8f9bc4

Find his director, get them to change their directive. Failing that, delete his director. Failing that, delete the otter. You could possibly imprison him, so that there's no way to fulfill his directive. The director is sure to send others though.

No time to talk now; that yeti could be anywhere. Try to find that hole that you made into this uh... simulation. Once you're safely back at the office, you can tell the secretary about how deleting office supplies on the computer deleted the real ones, and shredding folders labeled "Funny cat pictures" caused funny cat pictures to be deleted from Bill's computer. That's how the whole world can fit in a file folder: metaphorically. Point is what happens to the file happens to this world's existence. You don't know why that's the case, but that is the "how." So if we want to keep existing (do we?) then we have to stop that otter and their director.

Once you've explained that, then you can both mutually panic about how the last time you saw the file was at Grace's ... dining area, and after that messy reboot, it could be just about anywhere.
>>
No. 1074855 ID: cd10d0

If the otter is after the file, then where ever he goes must be the way to it. Follow his tracks.
>>
No. 1075096 ID: 15a025
File 169776675640.png - (12.16KB , 500x500 , 12.png )
1075096

>Find his director, get them to change their directive. Failing that, delete his director. Failing that, delete the otter. You could possibly imprison him, so that there's no way to fulfill his directive. The director is sure to send others though.
Hopefully if you delete the otter, their director will just back off. Otherwise you might be in this for the long haul. You’ll have to face this when the time comes.

>Follow his tracks. Go where he went.
>If the otter is after the file, then where ever he goes must be the way to it. Follow his tracks.
Only way is going down. You continue to follow the otter’s tracks.

>No time to talk now; that yeti could be anywhere. Try to find that hole that you made into this uh... simulation.
As you ski down further, you skid to a stop. There’s holes all over here, and otter tracks to boot! But, which one did he go in? His tracks go every which way!
>>
No. 1075105 ID: e51896

from the looks of things, he stopped before he was about to fall into the bottom hole on the left, then walked into the middle hole on the left. Then he climbed out of the bottom hole on the right, and jumped into the top hole on the right.
>>
No. 1075112 ID: 273c18

>>1075105
Perhaps. Tracks aren't 100% reliable anyway, you can fake them.

Look before you leap.
>>
No. 1075119 ID: 9fbc97

>>1075096
They are defenitely unreliable, that path implies backtracking atleast once, but we just need to find the last hole he went into
The skis are missing so he picked them up after that turn, and theres no boot tracks at bottom left
Top left and bottom left can be discarded
Theres a set of tracks facing right om the bottom right, before heading up
Thats either where he got off the skis the first time, or if he took the left path first, where he landed after jumping
Bottom right he would have need to backtrack twice, which takes considerably longer
I think hes on the top right
>>
No. 1075130 ID: dd3fe0

Is it possible to do the jump implied at the right, from a standing jump? Or did he go backwards in his steps? Is there evidence of a running jump, or any of the tracks being double dipped as it were?
>>
No. 1075899 ID: 15a025
File 169863073156.png - (109.54KB , 500x500 , 13.png )
1075899

>Tracks aren't 100% reliable anyway, you can fake them.
>They are defenitely unreliable, that path implies backtracking atleast once, but we just need to find the last hole he went into.
That otter is certainly a crafty one. He’s trying to throw you off his trail!
>The skis are missing so he picked them up after that turn, and theres no boot tracks at bottom left
>Top left and bottom left can be discarded
>Theres a set of tracks facing right om the bottom right, before heading up
>Thats either where he got off the skis the first time, or if he took the left path first, where he landed after jumping
>Bottom right he would have need to backtrack twice, which takes considerably longer
>I think hes on the top right
>Look before you leap.

You examine the holes, starting with the top right one.

Head’s pounding just looking into that one…
>>
No. 1075900 ID: 15a025
File 169863075708.png - (111.17KB , 500x500 , 14.png )
1075900

Next you look into the other holes. The other four look more similar to the static you had when you blacked out for a bit in the lunch room with Grace.
Which hole will you jump into?
>>
No. 1075904 ID: 273c18

Top right.
>>
No. 1075930 ID: 8f9bc4

Top right is a fractal of some sort, either a fire or other self-replicating thing, or an image that's been artificially brightened too much. Rest of it is... I mean who the heck knows.It's either the middle left, the top right, or the bottom right. Hm...
>>
No. 1075960 ID: 681cb5

Top left! It's the only one without tracks!
>>
No. 1076038 ID: cd10d0

Top right, if it's the only unique one.
>>
No. 1076043 ID: fa6745

Top right, i think this implies otter saw all of the other ones, but specifically was looking for the fractal one
>Head’s pounding just looking into that one
maybe close your eyes before jumping in?
>>
No. 1076136 ID: 15a025
File 169888152577.png - (589.44KB , 500x500 , 15.png )
1076136

>Top right, i think this implies otter saw all of the other ones, but specifically was looking for the fractal one
>Top right, if it's the only unique one.
Well, here goes nothing!
>maybe close your eyes before jumping in?
You close your eyes and jump into the top right hole. Even with your eyes closed, you can still see and hear the cacophony of strange computer effects and sounds.
>>
No. 1076137 ID: 15a025
File 169888154498.png - (447.42KB , 500x500 , 16.png )
1076137

You hear some commotion, but everything’s still weird and glitchy. It’s like a bunch of memories with Grace are all playing at once…
>>
No. 1076139 ID: 15a025
File 169888164093.png - (17.47KB , 500x500 , 17.png )
1076139

When you finally start coming to, you find you’re holding the folder and a gun?

Otter: “Flynn run! He’s trying to trick you!”

Grace: “No Flynn! He’s lying! Please, put an end to this!”

You look around confused. Since when as the otter referred to you by name? You ask Grace what’s going on.

Grace: “He’s trying to mess with you Flynn! He’s lying about switching bodies with me!”

Otter: “Flynn take the file and run! He’s going to kill you!”

Ooough! Your head is throbbing. You can't even think straight, how are you even going to tell who’s telling the truth here?
Surely there’s something only Grace would know or be able to do…
>>
No. 1076140 ID: 273c18

Ask what you and her ate on your date.
>>
No. 1076148 ID: 8f9bc4

The real Grace would never point, with a finger!

Deer have hooves!
>>
No. 1076154 ID: e5709d

Shoot them both.
>>
No. 1076202 ID: 273c18

>>1076148
Shit you're right. "Grace" is an impostor; the stolen form isn't even correct. In addition, "her" headset is the same as the one we saw the otter wearing, and the "otter" is the one wearing grace's real headset. The difference between the two headsets is the length of the microphone. The otter's had a short microphone, grace had a long microphone arm.

Checking memories is probably a bad idea on hindsight because we just went through the hole that held all those memories. If the otter jumped in that hole then he saw all the memories too.

I guess there's one final thing we could check: see if Grace can glow her nose.
>>
No. 1076235 ID: 15a025
File 169896397568.png - (19.97KB , 500x500 , 18.png )
1076235

>Ask what you and her ate on your date.
You tell them to write down what the two of you had on your lunch date earlier.
Shoot, both of them are right, albeit slightly different.
>>
No. 1076237 ID: 15a025
File 169896400275.png - (15.85KB , 500x500 , 19.png )
1076237

> Checking memories is probably a bad idea on hindsight because we just went through the hole that held all those memories. If the otter jumped in that hole then he saw all the memories too.
Oh no! It’s possible he could have looked into your memories! This is going to be tougher than you thought.

> The real Grace would never point, with a finger! Deer have hooves!
> "Grace" is an impostor; the stolen form isn't even correct. In addition, "her" headset is the same as the one we saw the otter wearing, and the "otter" is the one wearing grace's real headset.
That’s right! Grace doesn’t have fingers, she has hoof hands like yourself!
You shoot imposter Grace, blasting them into bits.
>>
No. 1076238 ID: 15a025
File 169896403530.png - (13.71KB , 500x500 , 20.png )
1076238

The otter Grace smiles and tears up.
Otter Grace: “Oh Flynn! How’d you know I was the real one!”

You explain your immaculate attention to detail to her.
Her smile slowly turns into a frown, and she starts tearing up more. You ask what’s wrong?

Otter Grace: “I-I-I don’t want to be stuck like this Flynn! I don’t want be an otter!”

O-ooh. You kinda did just destroy her actual body. Hm, how are you going to fix this one now?
>>
No. 1076240 ID: 273c18

>>1076238
...maybe Human Resources can help. Also, I suspect that if we trigger another time loop somehow she'll get her body back. After all, the otter was "killed" by the yeti last loop.

For now, we need to research how to solve things permanently. ...the File contains the world, apparently. Filing it is probably forbidden because it will cause a recursion loop, but what would happen if we simply looked inside it? Maybe we need to ask whoever made these rules. Who gave her the order to keep track of the File?

We also need to figure out why you keep having gaps in your memory. Tell her about the gaps to see if they sound familiar to her.
>>
No. 1076315 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1076238

Oh well then maybe we otter do something about it.
>>
No. 1076323 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1076315

It's an otter catastrophe.
>>
No. 1076337 ID: e51896

Well, if the otter survived the first time he died to the yeti after the reboot, odds are after the system reboots again, Grace will be back to normal

Also, a thought, can we backup the do not file folder and its contents? All thats gonna happen is that this otter is going to keep coming back over and over again until he destroys that file.
But what if we take it to a copy machine, make a few copies, and hide those in a secure place so that if the file gets destroyed, we have backups?

Otter than that lets fiz Grace's situation. Human resources might can fix Grace. Plus we still need to return the keys to her. Thats something she wanted us to do, remember?
>>
No. 1076342 ID: cd10d0

How otterly humiliating. Go see HR.
>>
No. 1076353 ID: 8f9bc4

Wotter we gonna do if she can't change back?
>>
No. 1076391 ID: 3ea497

Tell her you will try to get it fixed like you are trying to fix the other stuff.

In the mean time, she can takes this as a very realistic costume that she can play with!
>>
No. 1076401 ID: 8f9bc4

At least she can swim really well. Except the water in the ski simulation is all frozen up in the form of snow. Oh well. I'm sure she would have a lot of fun if the temperature was a little bit






hotter
>>
No. 1076403 ID: f2cf5a

STOP THIS IS PAINFUL
>>
No. 1076478 ID: 15a025
File 169915937686.png - (12.91KB , 500x500 , 21.png )
1076478

>well then maybe we otter do something about it.
>It's an otter catastrophe.
>How otterly humiliating.
>Wotter we gonna do if she can't change back?

Grace: “STOP IT FLYNN! I DON’T WANNA BE STUCK AS AN AH-AH-OTTER!”
>>
No. 1076479 ID: 15a025
File 169915950812.png - (14.52KB , 500x500 , 22.png )
1076479

>We also need to figure out why you keep having gaps in your memory. Tell her about the gaps to see if they sound familiar to her.
Grace: “Usually, I think anyway… Weird memory gaps only pop up when you regain some memories from the past sessions. It’s like you can remember a part of another past, but just a little snippet. I’ve never experienced something like that in a present experience.”

>Go see HR.
>Tell her you will try to get it fixed like you are trying to fix the other stuff.
>...maybe Human Resources can help
>Plus we still need to return the keys
Hm, that is right. You suggest going to see HR.

Grace: “I can’t go out looking like, like this!”

You ask why not? She just gives you a look.

Grace: “Uh, I can’t go around looking so otterly unfashionable! I’ll be the joke of the office!”

You try to cheer her up a bit, she doesn’t look that bad as an otter.

Grace: “Ahh, thanks Flynn. But no, really. I look and sound like the guy who wanted to destroy us. I don’t feel safe walking around looking like this.”

Yeah…that might be a more tough one to explain to your coworkers. Especially if they're not in the know on what's happening around here.
You could either leave Grace here for now, or maybe there’s something you can do to change up her outfit? Something that doesn't say "Look out! It's that otter!!!"
>>
No. 1076481 ID: 273c18

Well, where are we? Maybe we can get her some clothes? Or she can take off that tie? Swap shirts with you maybe?
>>
No. 1076488 ID: 8f9bc4

Lend her our antlers. Nobody would suspect she was an otter then.

wait

OK OK I got it. Take the clothes off of Grace's dead body, wearing those they'll think she's

wait
>>
No. 1076520 ID: e51896

Do we still have our safety helmet we can give her to hide those otter ears?
>>
No. 1076536 ID: 273c18

Hmm I don't suppose we could do some digital weirdness and give Grace a copy of our body?
>>
No. 1076549 ID: 15a025
File 169923067298.png - (13.58KB , 500x500 , 23.png )
1076549

>Lend her our antlers. Nobody would suspect she was an otter then.
Unfortunately, your antlers are firmly planted in your head. Unless you were to saw them off and make her a headband, they’re stuck on you for now.

>Well, where are we?
Hard to see, but it seems your in the little lunch room you were in earlier.

>I got it. Take the clothes off of Grace's dead body, wearing those they'll think she's
>wait
Just a dusty pile of one’s and zero’s were her old body once stayed sadly.

>she can take off that tie? Swap shirts with you maybe?
Hm, that might work? Oh wait, your clothes aren’t going to fit her, she’s much smaller than you now. You still have her take the tie off though.

>Do we still have our safety helmet we can give her to hide those otter ears?
As a matter of fact, you do! You equip her with your make shift helmet. Ears now hidden.

Otter Grace: “Hm, I feel a little silly, but maybe this should be good enough. I guess for now we can just say I’m a new construction guy?”
>>
No. 1076550 ID: 15a025
File 169923078563.png - (21.68KB , 500x500 , 24.png )
1076550

With the makeshift disguise in place, you head over to helpful resources undisturbed.

HR Manager: “Here to finally return my keys?”

You return them to her. She sighs with relief and then squints at Otter Grace.

HR Manager: ”Is that…? Flynn who is that with you?”

How will you explain things to the HR Manager?
>>
No. 1076551 ID: 273c18

>>1076550
Tell her you have eliminated an intruder, but not before he swapped bodies with Grace. Is there any way they can restore a backup of her body or something?
>>
No. 1076556 ID: e51896

Waaaaaaait a minute:

>>1072729
>It is your first day after all, and you haven’t introduced yourself to anyone yet.

>>1076550
>HR Manager: ”Is that…? Flynn who is that with you?”

we never told anyone, including the HR Manager our name, except to Grace.... How did she know our name was Flynn?
>>
No. 1076567 ID: 3ea497

>>1076556
It's true!

Punch the impostor and make her switch bodies with Grace.
>>
No. 1076568 ID: 8f9bc4

> leave it to Beaver!

Whatever we do, resist the urge to trade otter puns with her. Resist. Just calmly and collectedly tell her what's the motter.
>>
No. 1076580 ID: f2cf5a

>>1076556
HR usually knows who's who because they're the ones that usually have a say, if not the final say, on who's hired or fired. That said, no harm in bluffing and seeing if they know that fact or not.
>>
No. 1079385 ID: 15a025
File 170279468404.png - (21.63KB , 500x500 , 25.png )
1079385

>we never told anyone, including the HR Manager our name, except to Grace.... How did she know our name was Flynn?
>HR usually knows who's who because they're the ones that usually have a say, if not the final say, on who's hired or fired.

You would think she’d know your name? No harm in testing her though. You ask her how she knows your name, having not properly introduced yourself yet.

HR Manager: “I’d be a pretty bad manager if I didn’t know our employees names.”
She lets out a little chuckle.
HR Manager: “I should introduce myself more properly though, since you brought it up. The name’s Beaverly.”

Part of you groans internally hearing another corny pun.
>Tell her you have eliminated an intruder, but not before he swapped bodies with Grace. Is there any way they can restore a backup of her body or something?
You try your best to explain you gave the boot to an intruder, but he pulled off some weird body swap with Grace. You need help getting her back to normal.

Beaverly: “You know, with how screwy things have been here today, I almost believe it. How can you be sure that’s really Grace trapped inside some otter’s body though?”

Grace: “Well I know about the secret investor pizza party.”

Beaverly: “Well if this ain’t a beaver damn of a situation.”
She pauses for a moment.
Beaverly: “Alright, the best I can do to help is going into the employee records. I need you to gather up anything you can find that resembles Grace’s actual body. Clothing, fur, socks, shoes, the whole works. Got it?”

You’re a little confused on how she plans to use all of that to help, but it’s the best lead you’ve got for now. Where are you going to search around first?
>>
No. 1079389 ID: 273c18

>>1079385
Erm, what about pictures? Her employee of the month picture would be a great help.
>>
No. 1079396 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1079385

Defragmentation? Anyway she should be able to safely go to her office now and can hide work in there. She might have some personal affects there. Does she even... have an apartment? I'm afraid her old body's clothes might have been the only clothes Grace owned.

>>1079389

We accidentally shredded that along with those silly cat pictures a while ago.
>>
No. 1079494 ID: cd10d0

DNA samples maybe? Grab her coffee cup.
>>
No. 1082484 ID: 15a025
File 170708873339.png - (14.15KB , 500x500 , 26.png )
1082484

>Anyway she should be able to safely go to her office now and can hide work in there.
Well, if there was anything of hers left, it probably would be in her office. Maybe getting back to work will help keep her mind off this…new situation.

Otter Grace: “Quick, check my closet Flynn!”

A closet in an office room?
You open it up to find a wide wardrobe of the exact same outfits. You ask what’s up with that?

Otter Grace: “You have no idea how many times I’ve spilt coffee on my myself. There’s keyboards and mice up above too.”
Luckily the file didn’t share a similar fate.

>DNA samples maybe? Grab her coffee cup.
Speaking off coffee. Maybe you should bring take her coffee cup to? Just incase.

You’ve got her clothing figured out at least. Now, how to go about finding some of her fur?
>>
No. 1082485 ID: 273c18

>>1082484
Comb? Her chair? The floor of the office?
>>
No. 1082491 ID: 5ebd37

Check the floor of the closet, some may have shaken loose when she changed clothes.
>>
No. 1082509 ID: 8f9bc4

Maybe there'll be fur on something she rubs against herself a lot.

Like her headset!
>>
No. 1082526 ID: e51896

>>1082509
thats actually a great idea
>>
No. 1082562 ID: 3ee96b

Check inside the keyboards.
There is always hair inside the keyboards.
>>
No. 1083247 ID: 15a025
File 170778047357.png - (11.17KB , 500x500 , 27.png )
1083247

>Maybe there'll be fur on something she rubs against herself a lot. Like her headset!
She takes off her head set and looks at it for a moment. Hm, is it really a headset though when it’s resting on your ear?

Otter Grace: “Ew! Gross. Uh, no. I wish my fur was on this instead. I need to find something to clean this off with.”

>Check inside the keyboards. There is always hair inside the keyboards.
You flip over her keyboard and give it a good shake

Eugh! Either she sheds a lot or doesn’t clean out her keyboard.

Otter Grace: “Oh! Hm, maybe that’s why I have to press down harder on some of the keys.”

To make it easier to carry, you collect all her fur into the empty coffee cup.
>>
No. 1083248 ID: 15a025
File 170778053434.png - (21.63KB , 500x500 , 28.png )
1083248

You decide this should be more than enough to get her back to normal, and head back to Beaverly.

Beverly: “Wow, that was fast. Do you keep extra clothes here too Grace?”

Otter Grace: “Yeah, always spilling my coffee.”

Beaverly: “Yeesh. That’s a lot of fur too. Where’d you find all this?”

Otter Grace: “Don’t ask.”

Beaverly: “Alright then. I’m going to take this stuff over in the back. Just uh, give me a holler when she’s back to normal. Might take me a few tries to get it right.”
>>
No. 1083249 ID: 15a025
File 170778058619.png - (9.79KB , 500x500 , 29.png )
1083249

Beaverly: “Oh, make sure to stand still as well!”

Otter Grace: “Okay...”

Poor Grace, she doesn't look too hopeful about this. Hopefully it goes well.
>>
No. 1083250 ID: 15a025
File 170778065279.png - (5.69KB , 500x500 , whiteout.png )
1083250

A few moments later and that annoying dial up sound starts playing again. There’s a flash of white, blinding you briefly.
>>
No. 1083251 ID: 15a025
File 170778072025.png - (232.84KB , 500x500 , 30.png )
1083251

When you can see again, Grace is…well she’s a deer now at least.

Grace: “Oh Beaverly! I feel FAN-TAS-TIC! This new headset is soo cute too! Where did you find it? Hey Flynn how do I look? Do you want go hit up the dance club after work? We should go dancing!”

You do compliment her on her new look, but as cute as it is. It doesn’t really follow the work dress code.

Grace: “Aw. Well, yeah. Like, I guess you’re right. Alrighty try again Beaverly!”
>>
No. 1083252 ID: 15a025
File 170778073386.png - (5.69KB , 500x500 , whiteout.png )
1083252

Another flashing white light blinds you while more dial up noises blare.
>>
No. 1083253 ID: 15a025
File 170778077916.png - (101.75KB , 500x500 , 31.png )
1083253

Grace: “Okay how about- OH MY STARS!”

You're not sure why she’s freaking out, she looks a lot closer to her normal self now?

Grace: “I’m so tall now! I-fingers!? I have hoof fingers now!”
>>
No. 1083254 ID: 15a025
File 170778080390.png - (5.69KB , 500x500 , whiteout.png )
1083254

Another flashing white fills the room. Guess Beaverly heard enough to tell that wasn’t it either.
>>
No. 1083255 ID: 15a025
File 170778085167.png - (28.50KB , 500x500 , 32.png )
1083255

Grace: “Ooooh! Okay this has to be it Flynn. I feel just like I did when I got my employee of the month photo.”

She looks at her arms and her clothes,

Grace: “I’ve been upgraded to thirty-two bit color mode. What does that mean, Flynn?”

Beaverly: “Thirty-two bit color mode?!? We don’t have the budget for graphics like that!”
>>
No. 1083256 ID: 15a025
File 170778088738.png - (5.69KB , 500x500 , whiteout.png )
1083256

The room goes white once again.
>>
No. 1083257 ID: 15a025
File 170778093790.png - (13.43KB , 500x500 , 33.png )
1083257

Beaverly: “This better be it, I’m- this is starting to really wear me out Flynn!”

Grace: “Well, how do I look?”
>>
No. 1083258 ID: eb0a9c

You're cured.

And you forgot to try out the otter sausage.
>>
No. 1083259 ID: 273c18

That looks about right, though her head looks smaller than before.
>>
No. 1083267 ID: f7d131

I love this quest, I swear.

Turn her back into male otter and then kiss her lots in order to make this a wholesome story about loving people for the quality of their character and not their physical appereance........

Or tell her to look in the mirror and see if there is anything amiss. Still partail to the otter plan, though.
>>
No. 1083268 ID: 8f9bc4

You look great! If everything feels in order, we should make sure to shave off some fur after this and store it in a secure location, you know uh, just in case.
>>
No. 1083274 ID: 37927a

Thank Beaverly
...
Now, lets see about making a backup of that file so that if it gets destroyed, we'll have another one in place
>>
No. 1083276 ID: 2f41db

>>1083257
>how does she look?

Doelightful as ever.
Im glad to have back the secretary we'd grown fawned of.
>>
No. 1083277 ID: e51896

>>1083276
Indeed, the secretary is such a dear. I bet a buck we will always caribout her

Just because she's no longer an otter doesn't mean she can escape the puns!
>>
No. 1083279 ID: 8f9bc4

>>1083277

This world has no need for your elk!
>>
No. 1083280 ID: 75b262

Back up the file!
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