"You have killed Annalee Belanger II, a 12-year old dictator from Peoria, IL."

I am a patriot, killing the underage dictator of Illinois

Here have some more achievements.

Crack Shot: Kill two people with the same bullet.
DJ Grammy: Kill a DJ over 60.
Still Full Metal: Kill an alchemist.
Killed the Pope: Kill a pope.
Regicide: Kill royalty.
There Is Respawning in Real Life: Kill two people with the same name.
No Words: Kill a poet.
Dananana: Kill a batman.
Can't Bear To See It: Kill 10 people while looking in the other direction.
Mergirl: Kill a fishwife.
Hulk Buster: Kill a person who takes 5 bullets or more before dying.
Psychosomatic: Kill a psychiatrist.
I Fought The Law: Kill ten lawyers.
Unstoppable: Put 16 bullets into someone without them dying.
Dance: Kill ten people by shooting under their feet.
Mario: Kill an Italian plumber.
Put Down: Kill someone on their way to the animal shelter.
Full Metal Jacket: Shoot 8 bullets through a person
Invincible: Put 24 bullets into someone without them dying.
Tax Cuts: Kill ten tax collectors.

You have killed Malanie Van Benthem, a 11-year old wrangler from Norman, OK. She will be succeeded by her children, Bianka, and Garvin. She was a member of Codependents of Sex Addicts and Disabled American Veterans.
That 11 year old sure got around.

You have killed Dr. Erick Thaxton, a 82-year old stripper from Long Beach, CA. He was a member of Catholic Association for International Peace and HeroBox.

>>6577
That just made me feel bad...

Kinda hard to feel bad when the game lets you kill an eleven year old Cheesemaker with a wife and kids.

I was trying to see if I could make a big pile of empty casings behind my guy, and a big streak of blood in front, without killing anyone, but I fucked up.

>You have killed Dayna Florry Andrusiak, a 16-year old beauty specialist from Greenville, SC. She will be succeeded by her loving husband, Hiro. She was a member of Grand Army of the Republic.

The Grand Army of the Republic was an organization of american civil war veterans. Its last member died in 1956. Why did they even code that into the game?

>>6619
>I was trying to see if I could make a big pile of empty casings behind my guy, and a big streak of blood in front, without killing anyone.

Boring night?

"You have killed Tanney Emilio Parrott, a 11-year old architect from Panama City, FL. He was a member of National Association for Black Veterans, Order of Scottish Clans, Beauty Without Cruelty and Jewish War Veterans of the USA."


And it took like five shots to take him down.

>>6629
Demoman really sleeps around.

>>6621
In my defense, it was only a few minutes.

"You have killed Dora Talya Traynor II, a 31-year old martial artist from Bryan, TX. She will be succeeded by her caring husband, Dimitry. She was a member of Equanimal.

Dora Talya Traynor's mother's birthday is today."

...Which Dora Talya Traynor?

You have killed Mr. Nealson Wilden Hudepohl, a 15-year old astrophysicist from Steubenville, OH. He was a member of Animal Liberation Press Office and Pearl Harbor Survivors Association.

You have killed Miss Carolann Devonne Cotten II, a 13-year old sports commentator from Newark, DE. She was a member of Knights of the Kappa Alpha Order and International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender & Intersex Law Association.

You have killed Madam Denyse Versace Sr., a 94-year old exotic dancer from Gary, IN. She will be succeeded by her caring husband, Scotty. She was on her way to an animal shelter.

Denyse Versace would have turned 95 today.

You have killed Dr. Willetta Lacey Mujahed, a 50-year old perfumer from Attleboro, MA.

You have killed Mrs. Hildagarde Alida Hertzog Sr., a 86-year old pirate from Lynchburg, VA. She was about to get a promotion at her job.

Old lady pirate getting a promotion amazing

You have killed Regan Maxie Westgarth, a 63-year old alchemist from Phoenix, AZ. He was a member of The Society of Hispanic Veterans.

A hispanic alchemist? In this day and age?

You have killed Bayard Rivard, a 10-year old referee from Rochester, NH. He was a member of Air Force Sergeants Association.

You have killed Ralf Keffer, a 14-year old dictator from Atlantic City, NJ. He will be succeeded by his caring wife, Robinett. He was a member of Clutterers Anonymous.

You have killed Sully Ficker, a 11-year old minister from Atlantic City, NJ.

>>6880
What, you never read 100 Years of Solitude?

"You have killed Dr. Trev Douglass Anker III, a 95-year old batman from Columbia, MO. He will be succeeded by his caring wife, Andromeda. He was a member of American Institute for Conservation and Workaholics Anonymous."
>95-year old batman
oh my god what have I done

>You have killed Milissent Devault, a 64-year old sawyer from Visalia, CA. She will be succeeded by her caring husband, Ignace. You did her a favor. She was going to commit suicide when she got home anyway.

Too awesome for words.

You have killed Beulah Butvich, a 12-year old secretary general from Santa Cruz, CA. She will be succeeded by her children, Cristie, Wilburn, Ronnica, Lincoln, Rudy, Mark, and Matthew.
>12 year old
>7 children
Holy hell

>>7202
I'm more impressed that she was a secretary general at 12.

Some of these people need fan art.

You have killed Karlee Kariotta Rolston, a 13-year old sexologist from Baton Rouge, LA. She will be succeeded by her beautiful husband, Tann.

I killed a president and a prime minister one after another.

After them I killed a 13-year-old compassmith and a 10-year-old astrologer.

Sic Semper Tyrannis: Kill ten dictators.

Kids These Days: Kill someone under the age of 12 who has children.

From our Cold, Dead Hands: Kill a member of the National Rifle Association.

Where's Your God Now?: Kill ten priests, pastors, ministers and theologians.

Semper Die: Kill ten marines.

Gun Fu: Kill ten martial artists.

Bad Moon Rising: Kill ten astrologers.

>>7113
You have killed Sacha Melina Jasny, a 61-year old joker from Beloit, WI.

Who knew that bats was that much older.

You have killed Wynn McNichol, a 11-year old porn star from Decatur, IL. She was a member of Intermuseum Conservation Association.

You have killed Sir Pepe Jasmin, a 13-year old pimp from Fort Collins, CO.

I love this game.

Retire from the Business: Kill a hitman.

You have killed Carolan Hadi, a 94-year old wet nurse from Belleville, IL. She will be succeeded by her caring husband, Merril.

>>13273
Nice necro there